Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hello everyone it's Tatiana, I'm brand new here and unsure if I'm in the correct forum and significantly behind the average viewer here so how could I possibly have an answer to this age old question. The only thing I can tell you is what worked for me might hopefully work for someone else. It's really so simple even a cave person could do it. This actually hung me up in my transition for several years because I thought who am I to think I can pull off passing as female when I know I never could because women are so beautiful I could never reproduce this. But lately the shell I have been in for almost half a century has cracked and there's no putting the cracked shell back together after my eyes have been opened for the first time. It really comes down to faith in your gender identity first and your physical being second. While I have experienced augmenting my physical more feminine being successful of helping to cure a lot of the ailments that disabled me such as extreme insomnia aanxiety and depression. The real cure is being okay in your own head realizing that your identity takes precedence over the physical and we don't have to look like Barbie to be happy. if I wouldn't have come to this realization I would still be closeted with my wounds festering worse over time. Just being happy with yourself will let your inner identity confidence shine through and realizing all that matters is believing that you are a unique and as beautiful as they come you will find that all jealousy is gone. Love Tatiana

I wish that I had the level of self confidence that you do. I'm getting there though. I've only been full time about 6 months. But in that time I've built up a lot of self esteem. I know, physically, I have a way to go yet. I still see attractive women and wish I could look that good. But I also see some women and think I'm not all that bad. Not to seem mean or catty. But overall, I've come to the realization that I am what I am, a transgender woman. I own it, and I own it well.

Hello Stacy Renee.      Thank you so much for your kind words. I must say you do own it girl I think you look awesome but more important you feel awesome and it sure shows.  I know I won't look 1/10 as good as you do at the same time. But like I said I can't let my insecurities stop me because then I would still be shelled up forever. Thank you so much for taking out the time to post your feelings.     Love. Tatiana

I think it is worth saying that confidence can vary by the day. Some days it is high and some days low. I think we shouldn't beat ourselves up for the low days. As we live our new, more appropriate lives, it tends to get easier to have more  high confidence days.
Welcome Tatiana, glad you are here!  ;D
Moni

Excellent point Moni, your experienced advice is well received. You seem very comfortable in your own skin and probably have the same ups and downs as the entire population does. Which implies to me  you've done very very well.Thanks again for your advice I need as much as I can get. love Tatiana

I know I can't look like or be someone else from surgery.. I mean it can help make our appearance closer to "cis". What I'm jealous of is the affirmations they've gotten their whole lives about being female. I mean I'm jealous of any cis person for that.
But I'll live for now and hope to be acknowledged as my female self. I think I have a lot to learn and it isn't just hair and makeup.

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Quote from: StacyRenee on April 28, 2018, 06:08:14 AM
I wish that I had the level of self confidence that you do. I'm getting there though. I've only been full time about 6 months. But in that time I've built up a lot of self esteem. I know, physically, I have a way to go yet. I still see attractive women and wish I could look that good. But I also see some women and think I'm not all that bad. Not to seem mean or catty. But overall, I've come to the realization that I am what I am, a transgender woman. I own it, and I own it well.

@StacyRenee    That is a terrific attitude to have.
I am wishing you well as you continue in your transition journey and toward your goal.
Hugs,
Danielle

Quote from: HappyMoni on April 28, 2018, 07:04:17 AM
I think it is worth saying that confidence can vary by the day. Some days it is high and some days low. I think we shouldn't beat ourselves up for the low days. As we live our new, more appropriate lives, it tends to get easier to have more  high confidence days.
Welcome Tatiana, glad you are here!  ;D
Moni

Yes indeed @HappyMoni  we certainly do have highs and lows... that is a part of LIFE ...
... and I agree with you about as we continue on our transition journey our high confidence days come more often.  Great comment and a good attitude to have.
Hugs and well wishes,
Danielle

Hey Allison and Danielle thanks so much for jumping in. First off I want to apologize to Danielle for misspelling your name in a previous post I am so so very sorry for this  I promise to watch my p's and q's better from now on. I had no ill intentions whatsoever it was just a typo due to my inexperience please forgive me for this embarrassing mistake.   And Allison I know exactly what you meant about not growing up that way I would bet most of us feel that way but that was the past and there's nothing to be done about it but moving forward in the direction we choose.  All of you gals here are light years ahead of me but your interaction with this newbie is priceless and left me a little teary-eyed to tell you the truth.  Love. Tatiana

Tatiana,
   So you have 21 posts and look how you are contributing already. It  doesn't matter where you are on your journey, you are one of us and we are glad to have you. It is nice to share with each other. You have something valuable to share with us, your perspective. I do find myself jealous of others sometimes but I waited a long time to be a woman and live that way. Why would I screw that up wasting my time with negative thoughts of wanting to be someone else. That's when I lean over, rear up, and try to kick myself in the butt. It is really quite a sight.  ::)
Hugs
Moni

I agree wholeheartedly that you have to love yourself.  And its important to be yourself as jealousy will only get you so far. 

As the late comedian Arthur Godfrey once said, "the secret to life is to be yourself. People might like it, or they might not, but you can't force them. There is no point in trying to be someone else."   

Confidence in myself has gotten me through some rough early times when I may not have looked my best.  Great post Tatiana!

Dear Moni and Judy.            OMG you gals really touched my heart and were just what the doctor ordered with your acceptance. I finally shut up last night and read about people's experience starting HRT. I realized that I didn't know squat. So how could I possibly interact let alone give advice to a community light years ahead of me. Your positive support is absolutely Priceless to me. I felt I have been spilling all over you like a dam breaking spilling its water into a new community. and I'm sorry to anyone who took me like that it certainly was not my intent. I do have some secret weapons that led to my confidence which I have not exposed yet but feel I have to now. Thank you so much again love Tatiana

Quote from: Tatiana 79 on April 29, 2018, 06:44:28 AM
Dear Moni and Judy.            OMG you gals really touched my heart and were just what the doctor ordered with your acceptance. I finally shut up last night and read about people's experience starting HRT. I realized that I didn't know squat. So how could I possibly interact let alone give advice to a community light years ahead of me. Your positive support is absolutely Priceless to me. I felt I have been spilling all over you like a dam breaking spilling its water into a new community. and I'm sorry to anyone who took me like that it certainly was not my intent. I do have some secret weapons that led to my confidence which I have not exposed yet but feel I have to now. Thank you so much again love Tatiana

Tatiana,
   Now listen Girl, we got to get you to stop apologizing, okay? I think attitude is more important than having a wealth of information. You, my dear, seem to have a very positive attitude. That very quality makes you invaluable here. There are people here who have been kicked in the teeth over and over by society, by family, by themselves for having gender dysphoria. A kind word can mean so much. There is a relative newbie here, Alaskan Danielle, who has kind of burst on to the scenes and has been so positive that it inspires others. There are many others here who do the same. You can be a newbie and make an impact. Relax a little, know you belong, and bring your qualities to the table. Bring your hard times here. We can be good at listening too. I for one am enjoying talking and listening to you.  :)
Moni

Quote from: Tatiana 79 on April 27, 2018, 09:45:56 PM. . . identity takes precedence over the physical and we don't have to look like Barbie to be happy.

ewe lol agree! I'm more a dreamy Brat's girl . . .  ;)

Quote from: Allison S on April 28, 2018, 10:11:18 AM. . . it isn't just hair and makeup.

Or just the clothes one wears you've a healthy, great attitude Tatiana!

Hey Moni and Kiera    thanks so much for your no-nonsense straight talk to me. It definitely made me feel like I do have some worth here and increase my confidence level to be set free growing in intensity overtime. And Moni, no more apologies from me, promise. Thanks gals you really made my day. love Tatiana