Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Feel free to vent or say anything that's on your mind!

I'm thinking about how I lost an old friend today and I handled the situation very poorly :( crummy day.

Quote from: yayo on May 01, 2018, 07:34:08 PM
Feel free to vent or say anything that's on your mind!

I'm thinking about how I lost an old friend today and I handled the situation very poorly :( crummy day.

@yayo      Yes, I have had my crummy days also....  regrets about saying what I shouldn't have said... and not saying what I should have.

But this week has so far been quite interesting....  I discovered that my dental hygienist has a crush on me and gave me a nice card and a beautiful necklace.   .... and I am still wondering about 2 males that also have been vying for my affections... with gifts of espressos and chocolates...   so anyway, that is quite fresh on my mind and makes me quite happy and feeling very feminine.
Hugs, Danielle

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on May 01, 2018, 11:16:25 PM

@yayo      Yes, I have had my crummy days also....  regrets about saying what I shouldn't have said... and not saying what I should have.

But this week has so far been quite interesting....  I discovered that my dental hygienist has a crush on me and gave me a nice card and a beautiful necklace.   .... and I am still wondering about 2 males that also have been vying for my affections... with gifts of espressos and chocolates...   so anyway, that is quite fresh on my mind and makes me quite happy and feeling very feminine.
Hugs, Danielle

Ooh, yes! Having two men after you is great! I went out with two very handsome guys in the city over the weekend! It definitely makes you feel special and glamorous:D

Right now I'm trying to decide if I want to go peopling and have lunch with my spouse. I have five minutes to decide.

Sorry to hear about your loss.  It's never easy to handle a death.  They hit us differently each and every time.

Quote from: RobynTx on May 02, 2018, 11:13:13 AM
Right now I'm trying to decide if I want to go peopling and have lunch with my spouse. I have five minutes to decide.

Sorry to hear about your loss.  It's never easy to handle a death.  They hit us differently each and every time.

It wasn't a death, my mistake. The friendship ended. Bitterly.

Well,  if any of you have been following some of my recent posts on my thread, particularly today's update, I had a downright awful day yesterday... it started with my morning coffee and breakfast at my favorite next door coffee shop and it went downhill from there...  almost all day yesterday was a bust.
Today is a new day, and I am doing my best to make it a good day... so far, so good!!!
Danielle

Quote from: yayo on May 02, 2018, 11:52:28 AM
It wasn't a death, my mistake. The friendship ended. Bitterly.

Some of those are worse than death.  I had an old friend that I occasionally text with that I haven't seen in years.  He texted me the other night and during the texting I told him I'm transgender.  He said that was a surprise but is fine with it.  He wants to meet up and go do some fossil hunting or play paintball soon. So while I shouldn't be surprised by his reaction it is still nice to hear he wants to be friends still.

Well I completely messed things up with my roommate. I feel like a fool and I just need to move on, officially... I'm embarrassed to even say what happened [emoji20]

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How to proceed in my life in regards to having spent years transitioning--now just wanting to live, and the path forward that I thought I was taking seeming more difficult by the day due to forces I didn't forsee coming.

Also,
A: The fact that I am getting elective laser eye correction next month after all the medical/surgical stuff I've already gone through--and being like, MEH, whatever.
B: How much I bloody hate my body and still feeling hopeless about being self-confident in it despite transitioning since 2009.  Looking at the dating scene and feeling hopeless as a 20-something trans person who flat out hates her body and has trouble ever feeling remotely sexy even though yes, I pass fine.  Also on that note, thoughts of voice and other surgeries.
C: (Confidential matter)
D: Following up on deleting my social media presence on facebook (as it's become quite a monster in my life, and I figured it would be worth getting rid of it) while maintaining a connection with people I actually care about.

I'm feeling ugly, like I took a giant step back or hit with an ugly stick.  I don't see an end in sight for being misgendered:(

Bari Jo

Quote from: Bari Jo on May 02, 2018, 01:39:03 PM
I'm feeling ugly, like I took a giant step back or hit with an ugly stick.  I don't see an end in sight for being misgendered:(

Bari Jo

[emoji20] this is the hard part for me too. If it's not my face/facial hair then it's my body.
I know hrt takes it's sweet time, and it the meantime we do everything else to push ourselves further. I'm taking a break from (almost) everything so I can gather my thoughts. Maybe you need a break too? Or to figure out what it is that's making you feel this way. Could it be not going full time yet?

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Quote from: Allison S on May 02, 2018, 01:53:16 PM
. Could it be not going full time yet?

I'm not sure what full time means other than out to everyone. I'm already wearing just about everything I will when I plan on outting myself.  I also wear makeup and nails, have a purse, earrings.  If I did come out to my team right now, it would be so awkward since I look well, awful right now.  I don't look like my avatar right now.  My hair is about 1/2 inch and salt and pepper.  Believe me when I say ugly. I mean it:(

Bari Jo

Quote from: Bari Jo on May 02, 2018, 03:05:32 PM
I'm not sure what full time means other than out to everyone. I'm already wearing just about everything I will when I plan on outting myself.  I also wear makeup and nails, have a purse, earrings.  If I did come out to my team right now, it would be so awkward since I look well, awful right now.  I don't look like my avatar right now.  My hair is about 1/2 inch and salt and pepper.  Believe me when I say ugly. I mean it:(

Bari Jo

I'm sorry [emoji26] hair can really be a breaking point. I know because I'm growing mine out too... I thought about wearing wigs again but I don't know at this point

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I'm thinking about how much I miss having $20,000 in the bank.

Right now I'm thinking about getting more laundry done, dishes put away, lunch and how bad the incoming thunderstorms will be in an hour.

Quote from: Bari Jo on May 02, 2018, 01:39:03 PM
I'm feeling ugly, like I took a giant step back or hit with an ugly stick.  I don't see an end in sight for being misgendered:(

Bari Jo

Why does this have to happen? it hurts so much when my mind starts doing this, I can relate no doubt

As far as transgender stuff goes, I'm just wondering what I'll have to do to "pass," or at least not be read as transgender.

There are too many details here (and some of them are too personal). But I feel like if I could just get the voice down, finish hair removal (almost there!), and the upcoming SRS makes me just a little less muscly (at least in the arms), I should be okay.

It's hard keeping myself focused on that goal, though, since in the meantime I'm suffering some pretty severe discomfort.

Right now, I am thinking about a movie my husband and I watched last night. It was about alien abduction and the 'tests' performed on the human subjects.  My mind has now trailed off to crazy questions -- 'what if a pre or post girl was abducted?' -- what would these supposedly very intelligent aliens think?  Would they make her perfectly whole dna-wise? with their advanced technology and she could bear children or would they categorize her differently -- maybe they would think our species was evolving? Do such things exist where they are from  :laugh:  The list goes on with scenarios, but my lunchtime approaches and my mind snaps back to reality.

Hot tanned guy in scrubs with an adorable puppy that smiled at me can get my digits.. [emoji4] too bad he didn't ask lol

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something that's been on my mind lately, should I disclose to my doctor that I am feeling no I am transgender. my s yearly physical is tomorrow. that inner voice keeps saying yes but I don't know if I am ready for that or not.  :-\