Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Ok I had no better 'catchy' title for this, but Ive read and talked with a few people and I mean honestly from experience as well I really dont believe that they do. A lot of kids are bought toys and told play with these that doesn't mean much right, I know my best friend who is in the same boat gender dysphoria wise I talk with her a lot, she did have barbies and what not but she also have toys like Terminator and anything Alien(movie not just aliens lol). But growing up I played more with like Lego's and K'nex it didn't change how I felt or feel now.

Mostly I think its an argument from the older generation trying to justify why we are how we are with no real proof, I guess Im just looking to see what type of toys everyone had growing up

I did enjoy playing imagination style games but its not like I was ever rolled as the mom or anything either lol I dont know 

Quote from: Amaki on May 31, 2018, 10:51:51 PM
Ok I had no better 'catchy' title for this, but Ive read and talked with a few people and I mean honestly from experience as well I really dont believe that they do. A lot of kids are bought toys and told play with these that doesn't mean much right, I know my best friend who is in the same boat gender dysphoria wise I talk with her a lot, she did have barbies and what not but she also have toys like Terminator and anything Alien(movie not just aliens lol). But growing up I played more with like Lego's and K'nex it didn't change how I felt or feel now.

Mostly I think its an argument from the older generation trying to justify why we are how we are with no real proof, I guess Im just looking to see what type of toys everyone had growing up

I did enjoy playing imagination style games but its not like I was ever rolled as the mom or anything either lol I dont know

I was given the matchbox cars & gi joe crap & just gave it to my younger brother.  The only toys I had were my stuffed animals and I did play with my sisters My little ponies too.  I wasn't super 'girly' either.. but I certainly wasn't into the mac truck gi joe theme either.  I guess I was just me :)  I  did play a lot in the garden & the woods.

Cool thread Sophia!

When I was younger, I played Legos with my older brother(who suffered from dysphoria, but died before transitioning) and we used one of my dad's cameras to make stop-motion films, and then did voice-overs. He always did the girl voices, cause I couldn't.

I also had a Stretch Armstrong, and apparently those are STILL a thing lol

I dont fit into the sterotype or wanting to play with girls toys, i did play alot with building stuff like micano (spelt wrong) and lego. Made a brill camra from lego once lol

Yeah I never really got to play much with my sisters dolls (barbies and what not) we had a dog that loved the heads of barbies lol. But I did sleep with stuffed animals (well two) until I was about 14 or so that was when my parents adopted (it gets confusing but he was always family just my grandparents who where raising him passed and so) my step-brother, and with no other place to sleep I got a roommate from that point forward. I know around this time I more or less played video games 24/7 and where I still took time out for the old toys they kind of went to the wayside more or less. Yeah i think it was a good question too lol lets see if we can get others to look,


This question is for everyone on this board the whole LGBTQI+ community we have. 

The first toy I remember having was a little stuffed dog.  She had a zipper along her back and inside were two puppies.  Not too sure of what to say about that.  Mostly I played with blocks and building stuff from back in the day.  Never had a doll until I got Raggedy Ann when I was thirty two.  I was DEEP in denying anything about being trans at that point but something in me made me buy her.  She is still in the house half a lifetime later.

I don't think toys really say a lot about being trans or not.

I loved playing with paper dolls. Baby dolls were all right, but not quite as nice, and anyway my parents didn't give me one. Although I did want one. I liked the long lashes, and how the eyes closed when you laid them down.

Barbies I also liked, although my father and some other adults said bad things about them. I think that to me they were a bit in the same category as paper dolls.

I also liked and wanted coloring books, but my parents were against them as well for some reason. I think they were supposed to somehow curb creativity.

Legos! Yes! Even now...

I did also like the electric car tracks that our friends had—especially if they had vertical loops. I guess it must have been the physics. I also liked to observe how tiny toy cars rolled on inertia, but don't remember ever pretending to drive them. I was baffled by how some boys seemed to know all the models—to me they all were... well, cars. Some just rolled better or were prettier than others.

I did like putting together plastic models, but didn't really play with them much once they were complete. In a way they were like Legos.

Superballs, or whatever they're called—the way they bounced was absolutely fascinating. As was the way an arrow flew when flung by a bowstring, and the way a kite caught and danced in the wind. Anything that soared through the air was lovely. I vividly remember the dreams where I myself would fall and find I could glide, rise and swoop like a bird.

As for ball games, I rather hated baseball, football and most other team sports except for volleyball. I also couldn't understand why they'd excite anyone other than the players themselves.

I loved sitting and floating in huge inner tubes and diving through them. And diving for shellfish and sea urchins, and cooking them over a driftwood fire while sitting wrapped up in towels with my sisters and other village children on the sun-warmed rocks.

And I loved to read. We weren't allowed to watch TV much, and my parents didn't buy us video games, but we had what felt like an infinite library... I also liked it when we read them aloud or made up stories to tell each other.

I also liked board games. As for video games—my parents never bought us any so we only played them at friends' houses. I bought my first one after I started living alone.

But this is already getting a bit long, and I'm drifting off subject so I think I probably should stop now...

Year after year I asked Santa for a pink bicycle with a basket on the front. He never brought me it.

I hated getting dirty as a child, but did love my Lego!

Em

I was like most, i played with toy cars at very age. It wasn't till i was in my last year of HS that i started buying Barbie dolls.

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Since your post solicits opinions here is mine.  I once looked for validation of being transgender in my youth relative to my feelings and behaviors.  As a child I often felt out of place and my secret feeling was that I would grow up to be  a mom.  I enjoyed cooking, baking, taking care of the babies and reading.  I so wanted long hair.

None of that, IMO, made me transgender.  I consider self identification as transgender sufficient in and of itself.  Gender identity is intrinsic.  Behavior, and that includes preferred toys, is not a reliable indicator of anything.  People of any gender identity are able and welcome to play any role or with any toys that amuses them.

Gender identity is not reliably validated by behavior.  Too many lives lived locked in closets is one indicator that we cannot assume that what visibly fits is "proof" of anything.  I assume you, as an individual are the very best and most reliable source of info about your gender identity. 

Quote from: Tessa James on June 01, 2018, 02:33:44 PM
Since your post solicits opinions here is mine.  I once looked for validation of being transgender in my youth relative to my feelings and behaviors.  As a child I often felt out of place and my secret feeling was that I would grow up to be  a mom.  I enjoyed cooking, baking, taking care of the babies and reading.  I so wanted long hair.

None of that, IMO, made me transgender.  I consider self identification as transgender sufficient in and of itself.  Gender identity is intrinsic.  Behavior, and that includes preferred toys, is not a reliable indicator of anything.  People of any gender identity are able and welcome to play any role or with any toys that amuses them.

Gender identity is not reliably validated by behavior.  Too many lives lived locked in closets is one indicator that we cannot assume that what visibly fits is "proof" of anything.  I assume you, as an individual are the very best and most reliable source of info about your gender identity.

We should have this framed, yeah I know that but we still have parents refusing to buy opposite gender style toys for god knows what real reason, homophobic or other reasons. I know I dont have to bring any of that up here we all know about it in some form. But yeah its just a general question and even with the few post it does seem a lot of us somehow came to the few gender neutral style toys mostly because we couldnt or where afraid to buy or get bought for us the toys we wanted.

I played with all sorts of toys as a kid. I especially liked trucks, plushies, and animal figures. And of course I've always loved video games.

Usually comes from that old argument that there should have been some "evidence" a person was not happy from the start in their "natural role". Which in turn comes from the general interest boys have in 'objects' as opposed to 'people' and vice versa for girls reflected in toy choice. There's some evidence to support this in science studies, but it doesn't mean a great deal even if it's so. Just because one sex prefers dolls on average to the other preferring cars doesn't mean each never picked up the other in a creche or from their siblings' toys.

Personally I always hated dolls - the kind that are meant to resemble babies with the eyes that close when you put them down flat and so on, but I also had very little interest in toys that looked like vehicles too. Lego, dinosaurs, robots and mecchano were irresistible, though. As were video games, although I had almost no staying power with the old ones that were actually difficult compared to modern ones which almost play themselves. And I noticed boys and girls picking up both of them as a kid. I also owned a large doll's house that was made for me by my carpenter father, and after I grew up I realized an interested in doll's houses and miniatures is something plenty of both sexes (usually older) are interested in anyway. There wasn't much evidence in my case of any particular gendered habits in toy preference... I seemed to get bored of the stereotypical choices almost as soon as I'd discovered them and gone for the middle ground and in particular for things I could build my own creations out of. In fact my all-time favorite toy was a cardboard box. Or plasticine.

It is true that they've studied primates and found female primates have more interest in dolls than male ones, and male primates have more interest in toy mechanisms and vehicles than female ones, but again it's an average. They will still pick up both.

People just automatically respond to the transsexual admission by trying to think back for "signs" you weren't like the other boys or girls. I don't think it's intended maliciously, just them trying to make sense of something they know nothing about... and if the compulsion is strong enough to warrant transition they tend to expect it have come from 'somewhere' (observable or tangible).

I played with cars, action figures, planes, lego, screwed every electronic equipment to pieces and put it back together. I played alot outdoors. Riding my bike that I had build myself, playing soccer, playing Karate kid and Rambo. Build my first computer in 1986, I was 9 years old. Made simple programs, text games, in BASIC.

I got a doll house from my grandmother. My mom told her not to buy it. She did anyway. My baby sister got the dolls and I used the house as a garage to my cars.

I feel like a stereotypical person now.

Lego Lego Lego Lego.... I had other toys, but my Lego was everything to me.

If you ask me what I am, before anything else,  I would say Engineer. Lego has historically been a boys toy (less so these days), but I considered it quite gender neutral.

Later in my childhood I graduated to racing radio controlled electric 1:10 scale cars, but again, I preferred building and tuning them to actually driving them.

I think I was born an engineer, so I don't think my toys defined me, I simply went for the thing that appealed most to my mind. As a child growing up I just stayed fairly clear of the 'boys toys' and the 'girls toys'.


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When I first started transition I felt that I had to justify my feelings to others, and due to not being able to provide a physical cause for being Trans, I provided anecdotal evidence. It gets better though, because as I became stronger and more confident I no longer felt the need to justify my transition. "I am, because I say I am." 😊

Quote from: MissyMay2.0 on June 30, 2018, 05:00:56 PM
When I first started transition I felt that I had to justify my feelings to others, and due to not being able to provide a physical cause for being Trans, I provided anecdotal evidence. It gets better though, because as I became stronger and more confident I no longer felt the need to justify my transition. "I am, because I say I am." 😊

yeah no matter what I truly believe the same thing, Toys wise as I said yeah more building legos and what not. After my first NES (well the only one I ever had) it was a hand-me-down but still ever since than I found solace in games.. more or less locked myself up to avoid the real pain of the world

I have 3 older brothers so I received a lot of their toys. Except when I was really little I had no one to play with, so I wasn't good at imagination games. I liked to try to build "useful" things, like a real car using pillows and flashlights or a real skateboard using legos. I tried to attach plastic bags to playmobiles and throw them from high places to see if it would act as a parachute. I put together some sort of house for my dinosaurs so they would have a place to sleep. I also had a police set that my grandma got me and my mom hated, it included sunglasses, a toy gun, a plastic beating stick and handcuffs, lol.
At school I played marbles with boys, eventually some girls joined. I had some barbies and a doll house, but I never knew what to do with it besides setting in all the furniture and then putting it all back, but I also had some sort of doll house medieval castle and I didn't know what to do with it either. Mostly I played videogames, drew and read.

We were quite poor so did not have any trendy toys. Forced us to us our imagination to develop our own games. My Sis and girl cousins were all older so what toys there we had were mostly dolls and such.
I think that I was their favorite toy and that may have had some influence on me accepting the female part of my identity.

Toys are toys. I had Stuffed animals, My Little Pony, GI Joe and Transformers, Legos, and all the video games. I do not think the have anything to do with teaching a child's gender.

That being said, I wonder how many children like toy x only because they are told that they have to like toy x and that they should not like toy y.

If you walk in to a toy store almost all of the toys are marketed towards girls or boys. And the marketing can be quite extreme.

There is a lot of young boys that want to paint their nails and there is a lot of young girls that likes trains or construction. We as a society really must understand what kind of signals we are sending to our children. Today the norms are strong. Be in this way or like this and so on. But it does not have to be like this. Everyone should be free to be themselves and feel pride and happiness. No-one should be bullied or picked on because of who they are. It's terrible.

I like this old letter from Lego:
(https://static.independent.co.uk/s3fs-public/styles/story_medium/public/indy100/eJ9eAn1Vug/10209-3i1vmj.jpg)

I played with just about everything, honestly. Dolls, stuffed animals, toy cars, Legos, video games, etc. I wanted to create things, tell stories, and experience fantastical things; I don't think my gender factored into it. If I couldn't build with it, or build an interesting narrative around it, I wasn't interested.

I also grew up on a small farm, so I wasn't a stranger to dirty clothes and scraped knees. I have fond memories of catching small animals (bugs, tree frogs, lizards, etc.), rolling around with our dogs in the grass, and sprinting around like a wild child until I collapsed in the dirt. My mother didn't care what I played with, or how I played, as long as I didn't hurt myself, hurt someone else, or break something important.

I think our enjoyment of certain toys/styles of play growing up are less related to gender than they are our natural proclivities. I've always been creative, and I much prefer creative "toys," even today. There's no way to prove if being nonbinary caused it, or if being autistic caused it, or if I'd have been this way regardless; toys are toys, and I liked just about all of them.

We did not have very much in toys in post WWI Germany with the father a prisoner of war in Siberia, and a Jewish mother.  My sister and I played with the same toys, and whatever could be considered to be toys.  Our biggest problem is getting enough to eat and not going to bed hungry.  It got better when my dad came back in early 1950, and he could go with an old bicycle to his uncles and aunts who had farms about 50 miles away from were we lived.  He brought good quality food back for us from every trip, and hunger became a thing of the past.  I don't remember what toys we had later I just remember that my sister had a little hand cranked sewing machine, and I liked to sew stuff for the dolls of my sister on it.  She did not like anything I made for her dolls, and that made me cry each time she rejected a piece I had made with all the labor of love!

I don't know how much this formed me, but I never ever will forget how it feels to go to bed being hungry.  Still today I am not able to throw food away!  I eat it, even if I don't like it!