Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Alright, I pass most of the time especially at a distance, mists, darkness, and older people who need glasses, and yes, much of the time under more ideal conditions too.  But that is with all the accoutrements: Wig (due to age), makeup, clothes.  But how many women do you see with makeup or specifically feminine clothes out and about?  No makeup, shorts and sloppy t-shirt... like that and I wouldn't pass.  I just wonder what you all do about that.  Of course the younger ones probably have an easier time. Especially nice would be hair that would grow out beautiful. Alas however, that ship has sailed for me.  But still, just wondering what most of you all do to go out, like, "casual".  (Examples:  All spiffed up just to go to a damned grocery store?  Or Walmart, etc?  I have had folks complement me but indeed some have asked if I'm going somewhere special after this because they don't believe it is necessary to get so dressed for just some common store.)

I often go out without makeup.  Of course, without makeup, there are fewer femme cues, and therefore I am probably less passable.  What I do is simply not worry about it.  I don't expect to be the prettiest woman in a room.  If someone has a problem with how I look, they can look the other way. 

If I am in a hurry, but don't want to go out with my face totally bare, I'll put on some lipstick.  It makes quite a difference.  And I always wear earrings.  I put in a pair of silver studs in the morning and don't take them out until I go to bed at night, unless I change them for something fancier to dress up.  You'd be surprised how feminizing that can be.

I have the hair issue, too.  I never go out without something on my head.  Any time I am out of the house, I have either a wig or a hat on my head.  Usually a wig if I am going into town, even if it is just for grocery shopping.  But for taking the dog for a walk, or going to the weekly fire department practise, I wear a ball cap.  Although I keep my own hair short for wearing under my wig, I keep it long enough to show some curls under a hat, so the effect is quite feminine.  (At the fire department, there is a brief moment when my head is exposed when I switch from my cap to my helmet - c'est la vie.)

Quote from: Josephine8Alexandria on October 07, 2018, 04:26:47 PM
Alright, I pass most of the time especially at a distance, mists, darkness, and older people who need glasses, and yes, much of the time under more ideal conditions too.  But that is with all the accoutrements: Wig (due to age), makeup, clothes.  But how many women do you see with makeup or specifically feminine clothes out and about?  No makeup, shorts and sloppy t-shirt... like that and I wouldn't pass.  I just wonder what you all do about that.  Of course the younger ones probably have an easier time. Especially nice would be hair that would grow out beautiful. Alas however, that ship has sailed for me.  But still, just wondering what most of you all do to go out, like, "casual".  (Examples:  All spiffed up just to go to a damned grocery store?  Or Walmart, etc?  I have had folks complement me but indeed some have asked if I'm going somewhere special after this because they don't believe it is necessary to get so dressed for just some common store.)

For me, attaching false eyelashes is the most critical in passing. With false eyelashes, I pass whatever I wear.
I prefer very thin eyelashes, as they make my eyes look natural and are not so much noticeable.
It is very subtle, but very effective in passing.

Yesterday while having dinner with my friends. I am wearing my biking outfit (bright t-shirts and sports leggings).

(https://c2.staticflickr.com/2/1969/44253960875_afbbdc7d18_b.jpg)

barbie~~

My female alters make sure she plays up some highly visible female gender cue when she goes out without makeup; wears a bold print/color or a stereotypical piece of female clothing (skinny jeans, short shorts, yoga pants), a flashy accessory like a bracelet, earrings, belt or something in her hair, or a tight shirt that shows off her boobs. That always seems to be enough. If you look closely, you will notice most women who go out without their makeup do this same thing.

Well, I'm not sure I have advice you need on this. Honestly, trying all the tips given here is a great first step. It really is.
I know this is a bit presumptuous for me to say, but outside of makeup, hair, and clothes/jewelry, I would consider facial feminization surgery. Consulting with board certified, and preferrably well-known, surgeons can be helpful to get a better idea of what can be done.
I know that doesn't address body feminization though there are also surgeries for the body. If you haven't already tried, hip, boob, and butt padding can help.

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Alli can say is, have patience. I almost never wear makeup, especially in hot or humid weather. The more feminine your face becomes, the less you'll need it.

My face  has been surgically changed and constantly has a big ass layer of makeup on so i cant really say much

KathyLauren:  Thank you for the reply!  Hmm, good idea, ear-rings.  Could be.  That and bracelets maybe.  And at least basic lipstick just to plump the lips.  Thank you!  ;)

Barbie:  Thank you for replying!  Yes, lashes would help just I have not learned to apply them yet.  Maybe those new magnetic types might help those ham-handed like me!  ;D    Hey, pretty outfit!  You are very pretty!  Thank you!  ;)

Virginia:  Thanks for replying.  Yes, yes, those are good ideas!  That and wig that covers most of face and basic lipstick should be good to go for non-critical places.  Thank you for replying!  ;)

Allison S:  YES!  Facial feminization procedures!  I'm saving up for it.  That and while doing it, general face lift.  And breasts.  Plan to do it probably in Thailand.  That would do the trick!   Thanks for replying!  :)

Hi Lady Sarah!  Yes I am doing HRT but it does not seem to be fattening the face much due to my life-long resistance to fat that I have always had.  I thought estrogen would change that but my body resists.  Probably the dagnab age.  I will just have to wait longer than most.   Thank you for replying!  ;)

RedLila:  You speak of facial feminization surgery?  I am saving up for that, will probably do it in Thailand.  Yes, the makeup IS best to solidify the assertion of being woman, which tends to be required in this society which generally expects total binary-ism.   Thank you for replying!   ;)

Quote from: Josephine8Alexandria on October 08, 2018, 02:03:56 AM
Barbie:  Thank you for replying!  Yes, lashes would help just I have not learned to apply them yet.  Maybe those new magnetic types might help those ham-handed like me!  ;D    Hey, pretty outfit!  You are very pretty!  Thank you!  ;)

Magnetic types are just waste of money. You may check various false eyelashes in AliExpress.com.

barbie~~

Most days I just sport a "soccer mom" look. Casual top, capri jeans or a skirt and a normal top. If I don't` forget, I add dangly earrings but even those I usually forget these days. Primarily trying to blend in with other women in my area and age. I did study my cis female neighbors for quite a bit and do match what they wear. With winter coming up it may be more jeans, a female coat, and boots. I usually take a purse as well, my new wallet would not fit into any pocket. In the last 8 months, I have been barely misgendered. I also have a good portion of "don't care" much which really helps. My nails are usually painted.

Makeup these days is reserved for special occasions, going out and, of course, business meetings. Since I work primarily home office, I do not get that chance a lot either.

(https://hy3ckq.dm.files.1drv.com/y4mIDUnBWgjYVtxAKIAvbMz2cTnfVAwXcgVJENuXe6Q1NUlfwiYDv-sSUw9b4S1vQvQ9ZeOstu8XnZdor0oRqf19k5ZMSm2amK86Wzch3Tecytan8wKwkKrwV7dtrtq97kVauegue6d-2vVG-vTSk7RO1-GPo-Lsx-_ltXvbU-l0CATal2MgSHpTWPGEn2oZHL4YCFY_cFpyJZiwF1fAdZ3Ew?width=660&height=495&cropmode=none)

This is me grocery shopping.

Quote from: Josephine8Alexandria on October 08, 2018, 02:07:03 AMThat and wig that covers most of face

Be cautious about covering too much of your face.  I understand the urge, but it can look like you are trying to hide, and that will draw the wrong kind of attention.

A great question! I'm not much of a makeup girl. I like a bit of dark around my eyes,  a little foundation, and a special trick or two sometimes lightly applied for frontal jaw and cheek countouring on the average basis.

And remember the golden rule with makeup, ladies - less, is more!

I have a couple of guys that follow me around and poke everyone in the eyes before they can see me. That way, I aways pass. ;)

I'm really really hoping I can just pass with hormones and no makeup; I've always liked a little bit on the eyes but most days I'm too lazy to do much, especially if I'm not going to be out for long.

Relating to the subject line of this thread "Passing with "Plain Face ... no makeup"  ....
.... A couple weeks ago when I got out of bed and as I quickly got dressed and cleaned up... and getting my first cup of morning coffee, I looked in the mirror and was quite happy to see how I appeared before I did my makeup and fixed my hair.  Appearing as a female without all the makeup enhancements to me is the goal of full-time passing...
Danielle
       

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on October 08, 2018, 09:31:03 AM
Relating to the subject line of this thread "Passing with "Plain Face ... no makeup"  ....
.... A couple weeks ago when I got out of bed and as I quickly got dressed and cleaned up... and getting my first cup of morning coffee, I looked in the mirror and was quite happy to see how I appeared before I did my makeup and fixed my hair.  Appearing as a female without all the makeup enhancements to me is the goal of full-time passing...
Danielle
           

Yup that's the goal you look great [emoji4] am I a terrible trans person just wanting to put this all behind me a get back to my cis normative life but on the other side? Maybe but I can't help it haha.


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Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on October 08, 2018, 09:31:03 AM
I looked in the mirror and was quite happy to see how I appeared before I did my makeup and fixed my hair. 

Yes. Tidy hair is a kind of obligation for most women who care about their own beauty. I was surprised that many women here can point out very trivial details in my hair style. Most men do not notice or care about them.

barbie~~

Quote from: barbie on October 08, 2018, 03:18:40 PM
Yes. Tidy hair is a kind of obligation for most women who care about their own beauty. I was surprised that many women here can point out very trivial details in my hair style. Most men do not notice or care about them.

barbie~~

What's tidy hair? Lol I'm definitely not in that category, one trans woman I'm acquainted with teases me about my "chia pet" hair as she says... I like my wavy/curly and frizzy around the edges hair
Now I just wish it was longer so I can feel like a girl with messy hair and not a boy...

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Quote from: Allison S on October 08, 2018, 03:26:41 PM
What's tidy hair? Lol I'm definitely not in that category, one trans woman I'm acquainted with teases me about my "chia pet" hair as she says... I like my wavy/curly and frizzy around the edges hair
Now I just wish it was longer so I can feel like a girl with messy hair and not a boy...

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Yes. There are some cultural and regional differences. Here career women should take care of their hair style. For example, you may notice some regulation on hair style of stewardess if you take flights of Korean Air or Asiana.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimage.chosun.com%2Fsitedata%2Fimage%2F201804%2F21%2F2018042100876_0.jpg&hash=51ebfb636fc5aed1bc0e95d53b49dd05914b0510)

This hair style is an example of tidy hair. Another example is the hair style of a famous actress here: http://cm.asiae.co.kr/view.htm?no=2011041915401484890

barbie~~

Stopped wearing makeup 4 years ago when i had an eye infection, taken a few weeks ago, 61 in 2 weeks https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-0/p206x206/31046354_621161471568380_2876802617080545280_n.jpg?_nc_cat=108&oh=21556b68311c7dcab31c1642440d3b81&oe=5C56CAFB

https://scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/32841504_634250660259461_8706391560784183296_n.jpg?_nc_cat=109&oh=4fda06a509c1dc252d798d3f569de5ad&oe=5C484CB2

My thoughts regarding makeup, it is kinda like washing and waxing your car, it can be a beautiful car to start with, but with a little tender loving care makeup can enhance the beauty that is already there but it is important to realize that it is not as attractive if it is overdone.  Just enough to do the job that you want. 
There are a lot of girls out there that look very, very good without any makeup but if they are going out and about to a dress-up event, a little lip gloss, a little help with complexion and eyes, hair styling. etc... all of those enhancements if not overly done to the extreme can make a nice face look like a terrific face.

Just compare the "no makeup" picture that I posted this morning to the picture in my avatar profile picture....  I am the same girl in both photos but the enhancement is obvious I think.
Danielle

Quote from: barbie on October 08, 2018, 04:16:11 PM
Yes. There are some cultural and regional differences. Here career women should take care of their hair style. For example, you may notice some regulation on hair style of stewardess if you take flights of Korean Air or Asiana.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimage.chosun.com%2Fsitedata%2Fimage%2F201804%2F21%2F2018042100876_0.jpg&hash=51ebfb636fc5aed1bc0e95d53b49dd05914b0510)

This hair style is an example of tidy hair. Another example is the hair style of a famous actress here: http://cm.asiae.co.kr/view.htm?no=2011041915401484890

barbie~~

Woe tbey have beautiful hair. Sadly for my hair to be that straight, it would get too damaged. I prefer my soft wavy/curly hair since it's natural for me. I'm really impatient with it growing out, I want it long already

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the only useful advice i have from my own experience is this, get enormous breast implants, people stop looking at your face lol

Quote from: RedLila on October 08, 2018, 07:43:12 PM
the only useful advice i have from my own experience is this, get enormous breast implants, people stop looking at your face lol

@RedLila
I fully understand and agree with you !!!!!   
Enormous breasts will suck the eyes out of the guys that are staring at them. :o :o :o
Hugs,
Danielle

When I was learning how to put on makeup correctly from my favorite MAC lady, she would always say.  Makeup is there to enhance you beauty, it is not a mask. 

With makeup you can tone down flaws but it alone can't cover some of the male features.  Practice a lot, and I mean a lot of different looks.  Take photos so you can see what looks good and what you like and don't like and work to keep improving.  Years ado, I also went to a Diva Las Vegas event for a week where it was 24/7 and I forced myself to go out during the days with lighter makeup.  One thing that really helps is just getting out in public so that you feel comfortable with yourself and then you don't care what people think. (as much)

Good luck,

Julie

If you look in Danielle's thread at my coat picture HERE (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,236395.msg2182985.html#msg2182985) you can see why I do not post pictures with no makeup on. Only the guy shows though :(

Quote from: Faith on October 08, 2018, 09:15:06 PM
If you look in Danielle's thread at my coat picture HERE (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,236395.msg2182985.html#msg2182985) you can see why I do not post pictures with no makeup on. Only the guy shows though :(

@Faith
Dear Faith:
I do not agree...  I do not see "the guy" at all.   I think that you look wonderful in your coat picture.
Hugs,
Danielle

 I am now more prone to wear just lipstick and BB cream when I go to the shops but when I go walking the dog or getting fit its about what I wear...really about the colours and style....I might wear my hair up but I always have my jewellery on, and its also about how you move....but if I am brutally honest I am just me....I let me shine through and that seems to be enough for most people....those from here who have skyped with me might be a better judge of "how" feminine I am but I try not to think about it too much...I have always felt there is nothing so obvious as someone trying to be something they are not.


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Quote from: Julie -2010 on October 08, 2018, 08:32:57 PM
Makeup is there to enhance you beauty, it is not a mask. 

Today's quote.

barbie~~

I pass without makeup for several reasons starting young really nice fluffy curly hair and a narrow jaw line and blue eyes. I never wore makeup when first started transitioning I only recently started doing it in the last year. I only know I pass without makeup cause I passed before I ever dabbled in makeup. When I started my new job everyone thought I was 100% female and then scared the >-bleeped-< out of them. When I dropped my guy voice and spoke really loudly one day telling some thugs that were threatening to shoot to get the hell out of the store. After they left an things settle down I got bombarded with questions. "Eye roll" always fun

Quote from: roseyfox on November 07, 2018, 07:34:27 PM
I pass without makeup for several reasons starting young really nice fluffy curly hair and a narrow jaw line and blue eyes. I never wore makeup when first started transitioning I only recently started doing it in the last year. I only know I pass without makeup cause I passed before I ever dabbled in makeup. When I started my new job everyone thought I was 100% female and then scared the >-bleeped-< out of them. When I dropped my guy voice and spoke really loudly one day telling some thugs that were threatening to shoot to get the hell out of the store. After they left an things settle down I got bombarded with questions. "Eye roll" always fun

Ok, wow. First of all, that'a amazing. You have a lot of guts...seriously, a lot! They had guns?! I'll be honest, I'm a bit shocked they didn't use one on you... Which is a great thing they didn't. But I think for next time it's probably best to lay low in that situation or just try to escape... Sorry if this comes off insensitive to your actual lived experience, but that's just what I would do in a threat like that. I think you risked your life... That's scary

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