Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So I'm not for sure if it's a good idea to open this topping here or not but I'm looking for ideas and also offering up ideas for people that deal with stress and anger anxiety while I'm hormones so maybe we can help each other out and calm me each other without ending up in jail or the hospital or anything like that.

So one of my ideas that I am considering is a punching bag one of the heavy bags and as bad as this sounds taking a iron on picture and using a picture of the person that I wish I was hitting so that way maybe it relieve some of the stress and ironing that picture onto the punching bag and if it's not necessarily a person then I imagine it could really be anything

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I spend a lot of time out in the yard/garden taking care of flowering shrubs.  Lots of lower body exercise means my hips are just as wide as my shoulders! My diet and exercise program has resulted in a quite passable body shape without HRT. ;D

Quote from: Maid Marion on October 27, 2018, 09:52:35 PM
I spend a lot of time out in the yard/garden taking care of flowering shrubs.  Lots of lower body exercise means my hips are just as wide as my shoulders!  ;D

I never thought about the benefits of gardening but I kind of had two black thumbs instead of a green thumb unfortunately every plant that I touch dies but it is truly a wonderful idea and I imagine a great stress reliever

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I really advise against taking aggressive actions on any picture or image of someone else. How are you going to react when you see that person in real life? In the military, we train as we fight and this extends to civilian life as well.

Anger is something internal and although it may be triggered by other persons or events, you really need to control your anger within you and make it work for you. In my experience, the best and easiest way to control my anger is through any type of aerobic exercise program that lasts for a least an hour about 3 times a week. Running is excellent if you have the legs that can handle the high impact of running about 2 miles a day. Since I am older now, I use low impact exercise such as bicycling or swimming.

I am a retired Pharmacist and in my opinion medication should only be used for people who have no other coping skills. I have always felt that "chill pills" are way over prescribed in the US and this just perpetuates the situation where people just do not develop socially acceptable ways of dealing with anger and conflict.

Quote from: Dani on October 27, 2018, 09:59:51 PM
I really advise against taking aggressive actions on any picture or image of someone else. How are you going to react when you see that person in real life? In the military, we train as we fight and this extends to civilian life as well.

Anger is something internal and although it may be triggered by other persons or events, you really need to control your anger within you and make it work for you. In my experience, the best and easiest way to control my anger is through any type of aerobic exercise program that lasts for a least an hour about 3 times a week. Running is excellent if you have the legs that can handle the high impact of running about 2 miles a day. Since I am older now, I use low impact exercise such as bicycling or swimming.

I am a retired Pharmacist and in my opinion medication should only be used for people who have no other coping skills. I have always felt that "chill pills" are way over prescribed in the US and this just perpetuates the situation where people just do not develop socially acceptable ways of dealing with anger and conflict.

Well I'm definitely trying to stay away from any medicines for stress I take enough medicines as it is but I do have some exercises that I should be doing I'm just going to actually do them LOL

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You need to join a garden club and find out what you should be growing in your area.

Even upscale nurseries will sell stuff that won't grow in your area.  Before I learned I bought a lot of stuff that just wasn't right for my climate, even though they were all purchased from local stores.

Quote from: Maid Marion on October 27, 2018, 10:03:19 PM
You need to join a garden club and find out what you should be growing in your area.

Even upscale nurseries will sell stuff that won't grow in your area.  Before I learned I bought a lot of stuff that just wasn't right for my climate, even though they were all purchased from local stores.

Sweetie I live in the country anything or grow in my area they literally throw everything on the farms out here it's just me I don't have the tations or attention span to actually pay attention to guarding it of watering it every day and all the other stuff

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Actually for me beginning estradiol is the one thing that calmed me down. It was like an addict getting a fix. Seems my brain felt this way before. Actually I kept my feelings at bay during my teens and twenties by exercise. I played basketball on average four hours per night. In my early thirties my health began to fail and I could not exercise any longer. Basically I had the same ailment as Hank Gathers of Loyola Marymount. Cardiomyopathy. From then on I was depressed for 40 years. I have been on Prozac, Cetaphil, and Welbuterin. Once I started estradiol I have not had to fill out a depression survey for two years now. I actually look forward to what tomorrow will bring. Being able to come out and talk to people has been a great stress relief. Going to my support group meetings. It's not easy for me to talk one on one. Put me in front of a crowed with a training plan and I can talk your leg off, on the most inane subjects. I can't look people in the eye. I have never felt I was that interesting. So small talk is largely something I cannot do. But I am slowly coming around. I am still socially inept but improving. Thinking positive is I guess, what the cure is.

Meditation works for me. Not the kind where someone chants something over and over, but just trying to still my mind. Keeping a clear mind was very difficult at first. I will admit that chanting affirmations years ago did help. Not so much now because I do not need it.

When I get physically upset I exercise to relieve my anger. All of the anger Adrenalin provides helps create a great workout.

In the film "A Fantastic Woman" Marina used a punching bag! (But no picture attached ;))    By the way, this is a must see film for any transgender woman if you have not seen it.  It won the academy award for best foreign film this year.

Quote from: Dorit on October 28, 2018, 01:37:17 AM
In the film "A Fantastic Woman" Marina used a punching bag! (But no picture attached ;))    By the way, this is a must see film for any transgender woman if you have not seen it.  It won the academy award for best foreign film this year.

What year is it and is it in English and the only reason I suggested the picture is because I live with the person so I have to see them so release anger on that picture would I feel help a lot

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Exercise and meditation work for me. O usually use a cross trainer but sometimes I have a go on a rowing machine as well. Swimming can he really good if you need support for your body or joints and if the pool is quiet the sound of rippling water can be quite soothing as well.

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Meditation and exercise.  By exercise, I mean specifically long-distance cardiovascular exercise like running, cycling, cross-country skiing, etc.  There is nothing like natural endorphins for chilling!

I really don't think a punching bag is a good idea, especially not with someone's picture on it.  That sounds to me like a mechanism for magnifying stress.

Exercise is good.  Perhaps get a shoulder massage or a hand massage.

A hand massage is most relaxing.  You may receive a hand massage when you get a manicure.

If you go to a beauty spa or salon, they often can provide neck, shoulder, arm, face, ears and hand massages.  The hand massages at spas are typically over more time that what is provided at a nail place.   A facial is also relaxing.  But all that service costs some money.

At little cost at home, I soak small towels in hot water.  Then I will wash my face with one, then let one soak or rest on my face until it cools.  I may then get another hot wet towel and let it soak on my face until it cools.

Not only does this open up the pores and is usually good for your face (do not use hot water that is too hot though, to protect your comfort and safety), it feels refreshing and does help rid yourself of some stress. 

Men can certainly do all of the above, but I think the facials and nail services are more often associated with women's beauty than of men.  All of it helps make me feel good and the stress melts away.  That is, until I exercise a bit too much and a muscle pulls or strains, then I might again benefit from a massage!  Ah, the relaxation cycle begins again...   :)

Chrissy

I also suggest cardio exercises. The chemicals released will help neutralize the anger. When using anger as a reason to exercise, you will find yourself pushing the limits to see how much you can do.

This will help both to improve your mind and your body! That's a win win!

A punching bag is also a good way to exercise and works your cardio. However, I will agree that putting a picture of the person you are mad at, especially if you live with them, won't end well. I can see it magnifying your anger, and if they ever saw it, you would have things blow up in your face.


Hugs,
Lacy

Quote from: Arianna Valentine on October 28, 2018, 02:01:17 AM
What year is it and is it in English and the only reason I suggested the picture is because I live with the person so I have to see them so release anger on that picture would I feel help a lot

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It is a Peruvian film in Spanish with English subtitles if shown in the US.  It won the Academy Award in March 2018, the film was premiered in 2017.  Just Google "A Fantastic  Woman"   Marina, the lead actress is herself a transgender woman.   Some of the scenes are so real to me, I cried from recognition and identity with her.   Only a transgender woman could have delivered such a powerful performance.

Quote from: Dorit on October 28, 2018, 10:11:55 AM
It is a Peruvian film in Spanish with English subtitles if shown in the US.  It won the Academy Award in March 2018, the film was premiered in 2017.  Just Google "A Fantastic  Woman"   Marina, the lead actress is herself a transgender woman.   Some of the scenes are so real to me, I cried from recognition and identity with her.   Only a transgender woman could have delivered such a powerful performance.

I don't know if I'm going to watch it anytime soon I think I'll wait till I get over being sick it's hard enough to breathe right now with a sinus and upper respiratory infection I don't need crying and even stuffy or nose and everything too add to the list of current issues LOL but I will definitely check it out always love a good cry that's why I watch 11 seasons of mash

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Sleep. Knitting the raveled sleave of care can work wonders.

If you can, regular bedtimes without a whole lot of excitement or screentime in the evenings are a good maintenance strategy.

Afternoon naps are a sacrament of my own personal religion, and I do try to get to church every Sunday. [emoji39]

Hit the gym. Nothing wrong with working out the frustration and getting physically fit at the same time. 🙂  I am also a fan of motorcycles. A ride usually gets me in the right state of mind. 😎

Shame your to far away from my Reflexology BFF as that is so good , will clear your sines as well . See if you can find one that's recommended in your area.

Quote from: davina61 on October 29, 2018, 05:13:43 PM
Shame your to far away from my Reflexology BFF as that is so good , will clear your sines as well . See if you can find one that's recommended in your area.

That would be so nice right now too because I have a sinus infection from hell

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Quote from: Harley Quinn on October 29, 2018, 09:24:21 AM
Hit the gym. Nothing wrong with working out the frustration and getting physically fit at the same time. [emoji846]  I am also a fan of motorcycles. A ride usually gets me in the right state of mind. [emoji41]

I tried the whole gym thing for a little bit it did not work out well

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@Arianna Valentine

Hey Arianna,

I would try walking and listening to uplifting music ( ie nothing angry or negative)  Also watching comedy shows really helps change your mood,  make sure you have a whole season to binge watch and you'll find after 2 or 3 episodes that your mood can change.
My favourite comedies are, Absolutely Fabulous, Kath & Kim, Seinfeld, The Office ( UK and USA versions), Extras, Gimme Gimme Gimme, the IT crowd.

I found in the past a punching bag was a doubled edged sword, yes you get the anger out but you also end up exercising your anger....so I stopped doing it. 
Getting a massage is also really good to relax.

Take care,

Sonja.

Quote from: Sonja on October 29, 2018, 05:23:30 PM
@Arianna Valentine

Hey Arianna,

I would try walking and listening to uplifting music ( ie nothing angry or negative)  Also watching comedy shows really helps change your mood,  make sure you have a whole season to binge watch and you'll find after 2 or 3 episodes that your mood can change.
My favourite comedies are, Absolutely Fabulous, Kath & Kim, Seinfeld, The Office ( UK and USA versions), Extras, Gimme Gimme Gimme, the IT crowd.

I found in the past a punching bag was a doubled edged sword, yes you get the anger out but you also end up exercising your anger....so I stopped doing it. 
Getting a massage is also really good to relax.

Take care,

Sonja.

It would be nice if I could find a place around here that actually does massages that would be wonderful also how is one look up massage parlors near where they live I've tried looking up massage parlors but is there something else that it would be under?

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Quote from: Sonja on October 29, 2018, 05:23:30 PM
@Arianna Valentine

Hey Arianna,

I would try walking and listening to uplifting music ( ie nothing angry or negative)  Also watching comedy shows really helps change your mood,  make sure you have a whole season to binge watch and you'll find after 2 or 3 episodes that your mood can change.
My favourite comedies are, Absolutely Fabulous, Kath & Kim, Seinfeld, The Office ( UK and USA versions), Extras, Gimme Gimme Gimme, the IT crowd.

I found in the past a punching bag was a doubled edged sword, yes you get the anger out but you also end up exercising your anger....so I stopped doing it. 
Getting a massage is also really good to relax.

Take care,

Sonja.

@Sonja                  cc: @Arianna Valentine
Dear Sonja:
Very good advice about getting a massage to relieve stress and resulting anger.   In addition, getting pampered at a hair or nail salon, or a spa can do wonders to improve one's mood.

When I am really stressed out I also will go to the gym and workout, or go out for a long solitary walk, jog, or run....  while doing those activities I can ponder my issues, cool off, and come back with a clearer mind.

I sincerely hope, Arianna, that some of the suggestions that you are getting on your thread will help... it seems that nothing that is suggested is working for you.....  keep working on it... stress and anger are not productive.

Danielle

Quote from: Alaskan Danielle on October 29, 2018, 05:35:09 PM
@Sonja                  cc: @Arianna Valentine
Dear Sonja:
Very good advice about getting a massage to relieve stress and resulting anger.   In addition, getting pampered at a hair or nail salon, or a spa can do wonders to improve one's mood.

When I am really stressed out I also will go to the gym and workout, or go out for a long solitary walk, jog, or run....  while doing those activities I can ponder my issues, cool off, and come back with a clearer mind.

I sincerely hope, Arianna, that some of the suggestions that you are getting on your thread will help... it seems that nothing that is suggested is working for you.....  keep working on it... stress and anger are not productive.

Danielle

Thank you very much Danielle as well as everybody else I am taking and everything that all of you are saying and considering what would best work for me now that I know the punching bag ideas off limits LOL I don't need to be angrier I'm angry enough

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Umm stress and anger. Well. Those are definitely two things I deal with on a regular basis. One thing I won't turn to to help me cope is men.
Things I do are walking, a lot. This does help me, but it's also getting colder and windy.
I think keeping an open body stance is important. When you're at home try not to cross your legs or arms. Breathing can help too but only if you know how to use it to your advantage and not let your anxiety/stress take over...
None of this is easy. I fail at walking and breathing almost daily. Even talking to friends, family, doctors or therapists sometimes doesn't feel very helpful to me.
I think looking forward to things does help me. So rather than just talking, I like doing things with people too.
Also time to yourself is important. Playing hard and partying even harder isn't really the smartest thing to do for me.

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Quote from: Arianna Valentine on October 29, 2018, 05:16:33 PM
I tried the whole gym thing for a little bit it did not work out well

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🤔 well, the gym is not for everyone... I break out my iPod and crank the music... get out of my head and hit the heavy weights. When I'm concentrating on other things, frustration goes away. Same for motorcycles... it'll take your mind off of stuff and the problems melt away down a scenic mountain pass under the rumble of the pipes.

Quote from: Harley Quinn on November 01, 2018, 09:32:24 AM
[emoji848] well, the gym is not for everyone... I break out my iPod and crank the music... get out of my head and hit the heavy weights. When I'm concentrating on other things, frustration goes away. Same for motorcycles... it'll take your mind off of stuff and the problems melt away down a scenic mountain pass under the rumble of the pipes.

I think right now the biggest thing bothering me is a sinus infection I have because only certain medicine gets rid of it and I can't get the medicine

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