Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Transitioning and Homeostasis

I want to share something that I learned long ago that might help some of our members. I have noticed that many of our members who are in the early phases of transition struggle with their goals and even those who have transitioned long ago have related similar struggles. So this is an attempt to explain what is happening and why.

Homeostasis is "the tendency toward a relatively stable equilibrium between interdependent elements, especially as maintained by physiological processes."

What this means is that we resist change. We have an internal image of what is "normal" and our body and mind attempt to keep things operating within those boundaries.

For most people, this resistance to change is not related to gender but to other areas such as weight loss, finding a new job, moving to a new location, or even relationships. It is easier to put up with annoyances and do nothing than it is to take action and make changes.

In gender dysphoria, we sense that something isn't quite right with our gender and we consciously or subconsciously take minor actions to adjust our system back into balance. It could be something like a subtle desire to be the opposite sex. It could be a desire to experiment with cross-dressing. It could be just hiding features that we do not desire. The greater the sense of imbalance, the stronger the urge to make a correction.

Perhaps these changes work for a while, but then seem to be insufficient for us to feel like we are back in balance and that something more must be done.

Introducing Set-Point Theory

I learned about this while studying Health & Wellness. It pertains to human weight loss, but I believe you may see how it can relate to our experiences during transition.

"Set point theory, as it pertains to human body weight, states that there is a biological control method in humans that actively regulates weight towards a predetermined set weight for each individual."

If you have been a certain weight for a long time, your body thinks this is your "normal" and it will resist any change away from that set-point.

This is the reason that fad diets don't work. People start losing weight at first, but the body thinks it is starving and begins to use energy more efficiently, so progress slows or stops. People then think the diet didn't work and they give up.

The problem becomes compounded by how they feel. Chemicals in the body (vitamins and waste or poisons) are fat-soluble or water-soluble. Water-soluble chemicals are eliminated through urination. Fat-soluble are stored in the fatty tissues. As you lose weight, the fat is burned and the waste that was stored there is released into the system until it can be eliminated. This can make you feel sick or tired and can make you want to quit your diet. Because you don't feel "normal" and you want to get back to where you were. (Homeostasis)

Once the diet is stopped, the body will get back to its "normal" set-point, and the lost weight is regained. But then nothing has changed.

The way to overcome this is by making slow and gradual changes. If you lose weight by whatever means, keep at it. You may stop losing weight momentarily, and maybe feel sick or tired, but that is your body adjusting to the change. In time, it will establish this as your new "normal" and weight loss can begin again. But if you give up, you have accomplished nothing.

How does this apply to transition?

If you have been expressing a certain gender for a long time, this is your "normal" and your body and mind will resist any change away from that set-point. However, if we are dysphoric, any changes in the right direction will feel right. This doesn't need to be hormones or surgery. Simple changes in behavior can feel right too.

The faster we transition from one gender to another the more adjustments we have to make and that can be difficult. Add to that the reactions of others to drastic changes and we just add to our own stress levels. As I have advised many people in the past, the key is to go slow and gradual. Make changes using baby steps.

Spend time in therapy to fully understand what these changes will mean and what impact they will have on your life. Our lives are not one-dimensional. If you have the means, you could go for surgeries and instantly change many things. But that does not solve all of the issues you may face. There will be other things that need to be dealt with: identity documents, and updating public records (taxes, driver's licenses, registrations, etc.).

What about voice, hair, and wardrobe? You will need to adapt to reactions from others who knew you before: spouse/partners, friends, family, neighbors, coworkers, employers, property managers, maintenance personnel, and cashiers.

That is a lot of change all at once and it can be overwhelming. But taking baby steps helps you and others adjust slowly and gradually, thus overcoming homeostasis, the resistance to change.

Coming out to others is a step. You establish a new set-point. This is your new normal. You make changes to your wardrobe. That is a step. That is your new normal. You work on walking, or gestures, or voice. These are steps. They take time. Hormones take time, the effects are slow and gradual. When things are slow and gradual, people tend to not notice them as much, or if they do notice, it is easily forgotten because it was "normal".

And just like weight loss, the longer you stay at your new set-point the more likely it is that this becomes your new normal. Then, it isn't an issue. Then you can decide what the next step might be.

The other benefit of taking baby steps is when you are "settling in" to your new normal and getting through the issues that you will face, if the new you becomes unbearable you can always stop and go no further.

Wait and see if things even out over time. The odds are that they will. Then you can decide if you want/need to proceed with more changes or if you are content with where you are currently. Maybe something else needs to happen before you are ready for the next step. If you are safe, stay where you are.

If you stay the course, the changes you desire can happen. Remember that you had a goal in mind when you started this. If you keep jumping ahead, then going back to where you started, then trying this or that, you are wasting time, and money and jeopardizing your health. Stay the course. Go only as fast as you are comfortable with. Some people will be able to move quickly because their circumstances are different than yours. Just take your time.

Slow and steady. Baby steps.

I hope this helps you better understand the experiences you might be having, or have had in the past.

This is really, really great. And something probably everyone needs to read.

One thing I would also add is that homeostasis can be, and often is caused by fear. Fear of the unknown. The reason we feel comfortable with things is because we are designed to not like feeling uncomfortable with things. And most of these things are things we have no control over. It's called the comfort zone for a reason.

Baby steps is fantastic advice. Don't look at the peak of the mountain. Look at the next step you have to take.

@Lori Dee, this came at just the right time for me. I found myself wanting more too quickly since the New Year, but this reminded me of the original goal. I'm bookmarking this to keep it close.

Thanks ❣️