Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi everyone. Basically what I am talking about is how different your life would be as the "other" gender. Most people don't really think it would make a big difference. In fact, I think that's how most people justify telling us not to transition in the first place.

I live full-time as a woman. To be honest, I have no idea where I would be as a man. All I know is my life would most likely be something completely different than what it is now. That's a scary thought to be honest.

This was just a brainstorm I had recently, but has anyone else thought of this like I have?

I lived as a male for sixty years. Remember that we are shaped by our experiences. Had I been born female, I think life would have been very different. I would have spent less time in male-dominant activities that I never enjoyed anyway, maybe not even joined the military. Maybe got married and had kids, and spent my time making a home for my family.

As much as we would love to control our lives, most of the time, our lives shape us. Whatever experiences we have change the way we see things, which could change the decisions that we make. We could, maybe even "probably would", be living different lives. Same soul, same inner self, just different life experiences. If that makes sense.

Quote from: Lori Dee on June 24, 2025, 06:38:18 PMI lived as a male for sixty years. Remember that we are shaped by our experiences. Had I been born female, I think life would have been very different. I would have spent less time in male-dominant activities that I never enjoyed anyway, maybe not even joined the military. Maybe got married and had kids, and spent my time making a home for my family.

As much as we would love to control our lives, most of the time, our lives shape us. Whatever experiences we have change the way we see things, which could change the decisions that we make. We could, maybe even "probably would", be living different lives. Same soul, same inner self, just different life experiences. If that makes sense.

What a perhaps profound statement when talking about family. I think I agree with you if I had been born female I would have had a better family life, with lot's of kids and even grand kids running around everywhere. Thanks for that perspective. :) I also would not have played football which left me with broken bones here and there.

If I had been AFAB, my life would have been completely different. I can't imagine not having my wife and daughters in my life. I have no idea what Susan's life would have been like, but a world without our daughters is unimaginable.

I'm happy with my current life, the only thing wrong was that I had to masquerade as a male for over 50 years. Now that I have become the person I should have been, I am content. Sure, there are many minor annoyances I have to deal with, but the elephant in the room is gone. Everything else is simple.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

@Jessica_Rose

Dear Jessica:
Thank you for sharing from your heart.... 
 .... very nicely stated.

There is an old saying...
...later in our lives we "regret more what we DID NOT do instead of what we DID DO."

Unfortunately we can not go back in time, but we can live our lives
to the fullest extent now and in the future.

Thank you for posting your thoughts.

HUGS, Danielle [Northern Star Girl]

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on June 25, 2025, 07:10:34 AMIf I had been AFAB, my life would have been completely different. I can't imagine not having my wife and daughters in my life. I have no idea what Susan's life would have been like, but a world without our daughters is unimaginable.

I'm happy with my current life, the only thing wrong was that I had to masquerade as a male for over 50 years. Now that I have become the person I should have been, I am content. Sure, there are many minor annoyances I have to deal with, but the elephant in the room is gone. Everything else is simple.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

I have little doubt that my life would have been quite different. In some ways better, in some ways worse. Aside from the political and cultural hatred toward trans people, I am pretty happy with my life as it is. I think things turned out pretty well for me.

It's something I've thought about. My life would definitely be different. I certainly wouldn't have all the hobbies I have, I would chose a different path than I did when I went to college, and I definitely wouldn't have all the friends I have if I was born AFAB.

Hmm.  Well, yes I've thought of it.  Such thoughts invariably result in, "Quit crying over spilled milk, Richelle."  So I pull up my big girl panties, adjust my boobs, check my hair and face and step out smartly.   :angel:  :-*

Okay.  Really I just quickly arrive at a list of thoughts:
I wasn't AFAB, so get over it.  Don't dwell on "coulda, woulda, shoulda."
I wouldn't be the same person, how could I be?  My experiences as Richard defined Richelle over many years.  Richelle and Richard coexisted and co-mingled.
I have children that know me as Papa, and still do in spite of appearances, no matter how I dress, I am still the person they know, love...and seem to respect.
I have an adorable yet pragmatic woman as a partner.  I am still by her side.  Plan to be too, until one of us goes to join the gods.

I allow myself the occasional fantasy of thought.  What would it have been like.  Yet I'll never know.  I won't cry in my beer (which I really never liked any how.)  I revel in the now and plan to continue to enjoy the life I'm blessed with.