Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi Everyone -

I am new here and in the process of trying to figure out a side of me that I've ignored or pushed down much of my life until recent years.

I'm in my mid 60's, and when I have time completely to myself, I dress as and enjoy my feminine persona. No one else currently knows about this side of me but my therapist and wife. For a number of reasons am cautiously coming out.

Since my desire is to be a woman when I can be in that place, my situation seems to extend beyond simply crossdressing, but since I'm not uncomfortable being a man nor looking to give it up entirely at this point, I'm not completely on the full transgender end of looking to be a woman 24/7 either. Admittedly I don't myself find expressing as a mix particularly satisfying.  I do know that when I am in my woman persona, I do enjoy it and would love to be able to be that more of the time were other considerations not factors.

Look forward to joining more conversations 🙂


Hugs
Jaymie

Hii,

Welcome to Susan's Place, Jaymie! 💓

~ Lilis 🌷

Hello Jaymie Z,

I'm Lori Dee. Welcome to Susan's Place!

Thank you for that wonderful introduction.

We strive to make this a safe place to find information and share your thoughts and comments. No matter who you are, you are always welcome at Susan's Place.

It is important to remember that gender is not binary (masculine or feminine). It is a spectrum, so there are an infinite number of points in between. Your therapist can explain this to you and help you find the answers you seek. Many members here have experienced similar thoughts and feelings to you. Maybe by reading their stories, it will help you identify where you are on the spectrum and how you want to handle it. We all have similar stories, but our paths are unique to each of us, depending on experiences, life situations, and environment.

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I will add links below that are important for new and returning members. Pay special attention to the links in RED.

Until then, if you have any questions about the Susan's Place site and the Forums, please feel free to contact me at    LoriDee605@outlook.com

Once again, welcome to Susan's Place!

~ Lori Dee
Forum Staff

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@Jaymie Z
@Sarah B
@Northern Star Girl

Hi, Jaymie, and welcome.

I think you'll find that there are others here who are in similar circumstances.

Please do join in or start conversations. I look forward to hearing more about you.

Pema

Hi Jaymie,

Welcome. There are certainly advantages to being a man that many of us would not like to give up.
I doubt I'd have the paid up house or retirement investment portfolio that I currently own if I were born as a woman in the 1960s.  The engineering job I had would not have been available to me.

Marion

Hi Jamie and welcome to Susan's. The transgender spectrum is wide and welcoming. Find where you are happy and be you. Maybe you'll stay there and maybe you'll move left or right on the spectrum over time. The key remains to find your happy spot. I'm glad to see that you're working with a therapist. I've continued to work with mine through transition and will continue with her indefinitely to help me sort through the various challenges we all face. Best wishes!!

Welcome Jaymie!

Chrissy

Thank you all for your warm welcomes !

Lori Dee,, that is a good point about gender being a spectrum, and I wholeheartedly agree. I guess for myself, I find going even a little beyond my AMAB self I want to be a woman and partial steps are not entirely satisfying, and it is something that I have discussed in therapy and reflected upon. If I had to put a label on my situation, bi-gender seems the most apt, at least currently. We'll see what the future holds, maybe I will drift towards being more trans as I have the time and opportunity to explore this side of me further.  ;)

Maid Marion, as far back as my teens I had always secretly wanted to shapeshift between being a guy and a gal. Even though Human Services and  Healthcare have been more open to differences, it seems that overall it has been more limited with trans.

April Marie, good to see you once again ! I believe we've encountered each other elsewhere ;)


Look forward to further chats and sharing  :)

Jaymie

Welcome Aboard Jaymie Z!!!

Intent to find ways to express the parts of yourself that have long sought expression is a concrete step indeed towards finding them... Kudos on working with a therapist and having a wife that is not in the dark about things!...🌻

 There are many ways to make this all work and make your life a far better expression of the soul within... To become more the person you are... and let go of the things you are not... Go into his wonderful process with hope in your heart and a sense of joyous anticipation for the discoveries you shall make... All the answers that you seek are out there and will be worth all your efforts to find... 🌻

Amazing things patiently await you!

Onward Brave Sister!

Ashley 💕

Hi Jaymie,
It's lovely to meet you. Welcome to Susans Place. Your situation is very similar to my own and we are the same age.
You have come to a good place.

Ciara

Hi Jaymie

My name is Sarah and I would also like to formally, Welcome you to Susan's Place!

I see that other members of Susan's have also welcomed you as well.

It's lovely that you have shared a little of your story and I can understand how significant it is to finally give space to a part of yourself that you have carried for so long.  The happiness of wearing the clothes that feel right and knowing deep down that it feels natural has never escaped me either, so I can relate to that joy.

Only you can decide how far your dreams and journey will take you and nobody else.  That's not to say you should not listen to others, especially your wife, but ultimately this is your life and your path.  It truly does not matter how old you are or when you start, how far you choose to travel along this path, or exactly what your dreams look like.  As long as it makes you happy within yourself, that is what matters most.

Just like you, I have never told old friends or anyone else about me after I changed my life around and only a couple of doctors and family members know. There's nothing wrong with keeping your feelings and experiences in this area private if that feels right to you.

Sorting out gender questions is a very personal process and as Lori mentioned, gender can be seen as a spectrum.  By seeking help to explore more about yourself and where you might be on that spectrum, you are already on the right track.  That self discovery will help you more than you might imagine.

I look forward to hearing more from you as you feel ready to share.

Once you feel comfortable here, it would be appreciated if you add a little bit more about yourself in the other forums and threads.   I would appreciate it very much as, I'm always interested in learning something new about new members.

In addition members of Susan's will more than likely will discuss problems or issues that are similar to yours as most have experienced these issues as well.

Please keep in mind when posting that this is an ALL AGES PUBLIC Forum and the internet never forgets.   Do not post anything that you do not want to be made public.

Take care and all the best for the future.

Once again, Welcome to Susan's Place!

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Devlyn  @Jessica_Rose  @Mariah  @Northern Star Girl  @Lori Dee
@Jaymie Z

Do come back here often Jaymie!

Chrissy

Only you can decide how far your dreams and journey will take you and nobody else.  That's not to say you should not listen to others, especially your wife, but ultimately this is your life and your path.  It truly does not matter how old you are or when you start, how far you choose to travel along this path, or exactly what your dreams look like.  As long as it makes you happy within yourself, that is what matters most.

Just like you, I have never told old friends or anyone else about me after I changed my life around and only a couple of doctors and family members know. There's nothing wrong with keeping your feelings and experiences in this area private if that feels right to you.


Thank you Sarah, funny, my therapist also keeps telling me that only I can decide where I want to go in this journey. It is very true, but still good to hear confirmation of that point ;)  I am, upon advice and along with and despite my own proclivities, taking the coming out process gradually. As part of the coming out process, I realize that there will be bumps (& yes hills), and am preparing myself for the possibility that I might have to come out completely out of necessity due to things that happen outside of my control.     

Quote from: Jaymie Z on August 10, 2025, 08:48:27 AMI am, upon advice and along with and despite my own proclivities, taking the coming out process gradually.

Going at your own pace is always the best. I took it slow, too. I started by changing my "online persona". Then, when the hormones began making changes, I came out to friends, neighbors, and people I see often (landlord, maintenance/housekeeper, etc.). I then started changing my wardrobe. Makeup, women's jeans and t-shirts, then shoes, boots, and eventually more feminine tops. After a year, I went and had my ears pierced as a birthday present to myself and began wearing jewelry and wigs. At the two-year mark, I went to court for a legal name change, had surgery to fix my eyes, and started voice training.

There is no one path for everyone. The path I had planned did not work out due to what services were available to me. Work on what you want to achieve and go at the pace you are comfortable with. Always remember that you can stop at any time and say, "That's enough, I am happy." Later, if you decide you want more, then go for it.

Welcome Jaymie!

Nice to meet you.  I'm in my mid-60s and have just started my transition. We have that in common, and I am looking forward to reading your future posts.

Paula

Hi Jaymie,

I'm in a situation similar to yours. I'm just going with the flow of what feels right to me.

Alana