Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Eight years ago, I took advantage of this day to come out to my manager at work. I had started HRT in March 2017, but I hadn't planned out a long-term schedule. A few months after I started HRT, I knew I was on the right path. I realized that I would need to come out at some point, so I decided to use 11 Oct 2017 (National Coming Out Day) as the day to tell my manager. The following year, I told my story to the entire company.

No matter where you are on your journey, whether you are thinking about starting, or maybe you have finally become the person you always wanted to be, I wish all of you a safe journey.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Your video is powerful. I can only imagine the terror of the first time speaking in public, and adding in all the emotions of telling your story. You kept it together and told it so well. You are an amazing woman.

Now, I need to find some Kleenex. 😘

@Jessica_Rose

Quote from: Lori Dee on October 11, 2025, 11:09:14 AMYour video is powerful. I can only imagine the terror of the first time speaking in public, and adding in all the emotions of telling your story. You kept it together and told it so well. You are an amazing woman.

Now, I need to find some Kleenex. 😘

@Jessica_Rose

A few days after that video was made, I remembered the rest of the story. It was even darker than part I told everyone about. If I ever doubt my decision to transition, I just think about what almost was. Thanks for watching.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Thank you for sharing @Jessica_Rose, your video is incredibly moving, deeply inspiring and filled with such honesty.

I'm still dealing with the fear of coming out to my wife, knowing that I need to tell her but fearing the loss of everything if I do. Your story helps me Jessica, I want you to know that. Hearing your journey abcs experience doesn't make my decision less daunting but it does give me knowledge that I am not alone, that my life experience is not invalid.

I am wiping the tears from my eyes as I write this.

Thank you Jessica, and I hope your journey keeps getting brighter every day.

Beautiful Video Jessica!!! Enjoy every bit of what your courage brought you Dear Sister!!! Life is such a gift when we find the strength to let it be just that!

Hugs!

A💕

Quote from: IsobelWoods on October 11, 2025, 12:17:14 PMThank you for sharing @Jessica_Rose, your video is incredibly moving, deeply inspiring and filled with such honesty.

I'm still dealing with the fear of coming out to my wife, knowing that I need to tell her but fearing the loss of everything if I do. Your story helps me Jessica, I want you to know that. Hearing your journey abcs experience doesn't make my decision less daunting but it does give me knowledge that I am not alone, that my life experience is not invalid.

I am wiping the tears from my eyes as I write this.

Thank you Jessica, and I hope your journey keeps getting brighter every day.

Thank you, @IsobelWoods .

Initially, I was frightened about coming out. The first person I told was someone I had just met! After coming out to myself, I realized I would need some hair removal. I scheduled an appointment with an electrologist. After explaining the process to me, she asked me why I wanted her to remove my facial hair. Then added 'and don't tell me it's because you're tired of shaving.' That was going to be my response... I probably had that 'deer in the headlights' expression. I decided to tell her the truth. For the first time, I spoke the words out loud -- 'I'm transgender'. She said 'Oh, OK. Let's get started!' I'm still friends with her.

Many marriages do not survive this. It takes a lot of patience. Calm, truthful discussions, and a spouse who is willing to take the journey with you. Some spouses will flee immediately, some will hang around while planning their departure, and a few will hang around and see where the journey leads. For you to be truly happy, you must be free to be yourself. True friends will understand.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Quote from: Jessica_Rose on October 11, 2025, 08:52:17 PMFor you to be truly happy, you must be free to be yourself. True friends will understand.

And "Because I love you" is the only reason needed to stay.
With that, everything else comes together.

Quote from: Lori Dee on October 11, 2025, 09:05:29 PMAnd "Because I love you" is the only reason needed to stay.
With that, everything else comes together.

I often asked Susan why she stayed with me, her answer was always 'because I love you'.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Here is an interesting article in Forbes:
1 Key Sign Your Marriage Will Keep Going Strong, By A Psychologist
https://www.forbes.com/sites/traversmark/2025/10/05/the-no-1-secret-to-a-happy-marriage---according-to-new-research/
By Mark Travers - Oct 05, 2025

A short excerpt:

The single biggest leap in life satisfaction came not from marriage; it didn't even come from moving in together. Rather, it came from the very beginning: when the two partners started the relationship itself.

The true drivers of happiness are far less glamorous than what a wedding ceremony looks like. It comes down to how connected you feel to your partner; to how supported you feel by them; to whether or not the relationship itself feels as though it's truly fulfilling and sustainable.

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Hi Jessica

You are a much stronger woman than I will ever be in revealing who you are and I have read your story and finally heard your presentation video and yes I had some tears in my eyes.

Several times I have considered coming out, but in all my years I keep coming back to staying quiet about my past.  Questions that come to mind are, will disclosure materially improve my life? No.  Are there concrete risks if I do not disclose? No.  Do I want the emotional labour of managing others reactions and questions? No.

My life is settled and my privacy has worked for the last 36 years, all my documents are aligned with who I am and I live in a binary world so no reason to disclose.  The question that seems to be predominant of this issue of keeping quiet is "maintaining secrecy", but secrecy on this issue has never been a burden.  So the only rational choice for me, is to keep my history private or as I'm want to say "let sleeping dogs lie".

Jessica Rose, I see and acknowledge you coming out on, "Today is National Coming Out Day!" and I admire you for doing so.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Jessica_Rose

Quote from: Sarah B on Yesterday at 12:21:02 AMSeveral times I have considered coming out, but in all my years I keep coming back to staying quiet about my past.  Questions that come to mind are, will disclosure materially improve my life? No.  Are there concrete risks if I do not disclose? No.  Do I want the emotional labour of managing others reactions and questions? No.

I came out at work. Knowing that it would be impossible to hide my transition while keeping my job, I decided to use the occasion to help others. I wanted to help people understand why someone would want to do this, and to let those who were still hiding know that 'coming out' doesn't mean you will lose everything.

I don't advertise my transition. I don't fly flags, nor do I wear anything that would cause people to question my gender. I will only disclose my medical history to my primary care physician. Although some neighbors may eventually realize Susan and I are in a same-sex marriage, that doesn't carry the same level of stigma as being transgender. I will never forget who I am, and I will try to help other members of our community whenever I can, but I will stay stealth as much as possible.

Love always -- Jessica Rose