Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Non-Op => Topic started by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 09:15:58 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 09:15:58 AM
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 09:15:58 AM
I'm currently someone who has a vulva with all the expected parts related to it, but still affected with HRT with testosterone. I was born with a vulva.
Anyway, I'd like to be able to get bottom surgery someday, but since it feels like it will be so far in the future and it costs so much money + time, I might not be able to do that. I'm here mostly to find other ways to reduce my current dysphoria related to my genitals.
I'm a neutrois man who didn't decide yet if I'd rather have a penis or absolutely nothing. All I know is that I don't like what I was born with and I plan on getting hysterectomy done just so I won't have to worry about pregnancy.
Still, there are times that I absolutely hate what I've got not out of anger. It just feels like an alien that got attached to me and I can't get it off without surgery, so there isn't much that I can do.
I currently use packers when I'm not too uncomfortable sensory-wise, but I struggle to have it on when I'm at home and it doesn't always work to make me feel like it is part of my body. I don't truly know if there is a way to trick my mind into thinking I have nothing down there, so... You can let me know if you have any suggestions.
I'm sorry if this is too much to ask. This is just a body part that causes me a lot of dysphoria and I have no idea if I will be able to get surgery for this. (I'm focused on other parts of my transition to add to that.)
Let me know if you have any tips to not always be aware that I feel this wrongness.
Anyway, I'd like to be able to get bottom surgery someday, but since it feels like it will be so far in the future and it costs so much money + time, I might not be able to do that. I'm here mostly to find other ways to reduce my current dysphoria related to my genitals.
I'm a neutrois man who didn't decide yet if I'd rather have a penis or absolutely nothing. All I know is that I don't like what I was born with and I plan on getting hysterectomy done just so I won't have to worry about pregnancy.
Still, there are times that I absolutely hate what I've got not out of anger. It just feels like an alien that got attached to me and I can't get it off without surgery, so there isn't much that I can do.
I currently use packers when I'm not too uncomfortable sensory-wise, but I struggle to have it on when I'm at home and it doesn't always work to make me feel like it is part of my body. I don't truly know if there is a way to trick my mind into thinking I have nothing down there, so... You can let me know if you have any suggestions.
I'm sorry if this is too much to ask. This is just a body part that causes me a lot of dysphoria and I have no idea if I will be able to get surgery for this. (I'm focused on other parts of my transition to add to that.)
Let me know if you have any tips to not always be aware that I feel this wrongness.
Title: Re: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: jackiefox5585 on April 14, 2026, 10:04:09 AM
Post by: jackiefox5585 on April 14, 2026, 10:04:09 AM
Bottom surgery is no small feat, especially for someone in your situation. I am sorry for your pain, and its not easy to deal with.
I think there is no one right answer for anyone. I do have some tips for talking to AI that might help. While this does not replace actual therapy, it makes for a helpful companion who has all the time in the world to talk to.
Personally I had some success with self hypnosis. Not really to change me, but to put me in a meditative trance that offers a brief respite. I'd be happy to discuss that privately if you'd like.
I think there is no one right answer for anyone. I do have some tips for talking to AI that might help. While this does not replace actual therapy, it makes for a helpful companion who has all the time in the world to talk to.
Personally I had some success with self hypnosis. Not really to change me, but to put me in a meditative trance that offers a brief respite. I'd be happy to discuss that privately if you'd like.
Title: Re: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 10:33:35 AM
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 10:33:35 AM
Quote from: jackiefox5585 on Yesterday at 10:04:09 AMBottom surgery is no small feat, especially for someone in your situation. I am sorry for your pain, and its not easy to deal with.
I think there is no one right answer for anyone. I do have some tips for talking to AI that might help. While this does not replace actual therapy, it makes for a helpful companion who has all the time in the world to talk to.
Personally I had some success with self hypnosis. Not really to change me, but to put me in a meditative trance that offers a brief respite. I'd be happy to discuss that privately if you'd like.
I have a therapist and I mainly use AI just to ask some things, but even then, I'm more likely to Google things.
How did hypnosis help, exactly? Not something I ever worked with.
Title: Re: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: jackiefox5585 on April 14, 2026, 11:14:13 AM
Post by: jackiefox5585 on April 14, 2026, 11:14:13 AM
Quote from: darksou on Yesterday at 10:33:35 AMI have a therapist and I mainly use AI just to ask some things, but even then, I'm more likely to Google things.
How did hypnosis help, exactly? Not something I ever worked with.
Ok. not everyone is comfortable with using AI and that is ok. I personally found it to be helpful but to each is own.
So the hypnosis is more of a light DIY hypnosis. Its something you need to be careful with. but mostly where I'd convince myself that my body is the way I want it to be while in a trance like state. its something I kind of developed over time on my own. Its more of a very convincing escape than anything, but it makes for a nice break every now and again.
Title: Re: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 11:19:50 AM
Post by: darksou on April 14, 2026, 11:19:50 AM
Quote from: jackiefox5585 on Yesterday at 11:14:13 AMOk. not everyone is comfortable with using AI and that is ok. I personally found it to be helpful but to each is own.
So the hypnosis is more of a light DIY hypnosis. Its something you need to be careful with. but mostly where I'd convince myself that my body is the way I want it to be while in a trance like state. its something I kind of developed over time on my own. Its more of a very convincing escape than anything, but it makes for a nice break every now and again.
Interesting. I don't have much desire to work with hypnosis, but thanks for the suggestion.
Title: Re: Ways to reduce dysphoria while being non-op?
Post by: Lori Dee on April 14, 2026, 08:53:18 PM
Post by: Lori Dee on April 14, 2026, 08:53:18 PM
I am a retired hypnotherapist, and I have worked with many patients with a variety of concerns. The benefit of hypnosis in your situation is not to convince yourself of something, but to help you relax and be less anxious about it.
From what you have shared, I do not believe it is what you are looking for. The key is to find the things that make you feel good and embrace those. It can be as simple as jewelry, or clothing, a hairstyle, or even an old, beat-up pair of boots. Once you find the look you are going for, then you can work on other goals.
You have mentioned that you are often seen as male, so your clothing and mannerisms work in that direction. You also said you were going for something androgynous. I assume you mean less Macho Man and maybe something a little softer? As Marion mentioned, you can do that by the colors you wear, like more pastels and less Army camouflage. I am giving you extremes, and they may not be what you are looking for. But maybe they can help you look in a direction you hadn't considered.
From what you have shared, I do not believe it is what you are looking for. The key is to find the things that make you feel good and embrace those. It can be as simple as jewelry, or clothing, a hairstyle, or even an old, beat-up pair of boots. Once you find the look you are going for, then you can work on other goals.
You have mentioned that you are often seen as male, so your clothing and mannerisms work in that direction. You also said you were going for something androgynous. I assume you mean less Macho Man and maybe something a little softer? As Marion mentioned, you can do that by the colors you wear, like more pastels and less Army camouflage. I am giving you extremes, and they may not be what you are looking for. But maybe they can help you look in a direction you hadn't considered.