Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I'm back.

I owe you an explanation for my absence. Most of April and the first days of May were dark ones for me — the kind where everything feels heavier than it should and the words don't come the way they normally do. Part of what happened is that I just shut down. Not by choice exactly, more like the system protecting itself by going offline for a while. I'm embarrassed to admit that I knew people were worried about me, and even that wasn't enough to pull me out of it. That's how dark a place it was.

I stepped back because I wasn't in shape to be present here, and I didn't want that showing up in my posts. This community deserves better than a version of me that's just going through the motions. My words matter here, and yours do too, and I knew if I tried to push through it would come across in ways I couldn't take back. So I went quiet, and I let the silence do what posting through it couldn't.

I owe an enormous thank you to Danielle and the rest of the staff — Charlotte Kitty, Devlyn, Flan, Jessica_Rose, Lori Dee, Mariah, Robyn, and Sarah B. They made sure the site kept moving while I was away, kept members supported, and held the day-to-day together so I could step back without the whole thing coming apart. I don't take that for granted. This site has the staff it does because they care about it the way I do, and that showed in every day I wasn't here.

And I owe an apology to the members. To anyone who came here in those weeks looking for me — for an answer, for a familiar voice, for whatever it is I usually try to be in this space — and didn't find me there: I'm sorry. I know what it means when someone you count on goes quiet, and I know this site has people in it who don't have many other places to turn. Letting you down is the part of all this that's hardest to sit with.

To the members who reached out to Danielle to check on me — she shared every one of your messages with me, and your care and concern reached me even when I couldn't yet answer it. And to those who chose to do more in ways that have eased a real weight I'd been carrying — I didn't ask for any of it, and that's exactly what makes it mean so much. You saw I was missing, and you held the space until I could come back to it. I'm here now, and I'm going to start the massive job of catching up on over a month's worth of posts.

Thank you, all of you, for being there for me, especially when I wasn't able to be there for myself.

Sometimes, the best thing we can do for ourselves and the community is to just unplug for a while. Glad you are OK, and we are happy to see you back.

Big Hugs!

Dear Susan,

No apology needed on my part, I was worried about you but just kept thinking of you and hoping for the best.  Welcome back and I love you.

Hey Susan,
The main thing I hope is that you're feeling somewhat better now? It's hard when the darkness consumes you and in that space, we all find our own ways of coping that are right for us.

Also these experiences are part of you, but don't define you. Much like someone suffering a physical injury is not letting anyone down, then neither have you.

I've had a few wobbles too and nearly stepped away a couple of times, but alas I found ways to come back stronger.

Great to have you back.

Charlotte 😻

No apology necessary Susan. We all have our moments of weakness where the darkness seems to take over. You are allowed to take the time to reset and recharge you know. Nobody will think any ill of you.

Danielle and the rest of the team have been doing a stand out job as far as I can tell. I'm still a newbie but I certainly have not felt a lack of help or support from the site. Everyone has been very welcoming.

That's not to say you weren't missed of course!

It was noticed, but didn't want to...ask or intrude. Your input is so regular and insightful and it is missed when you are gone. You were missed greatly. 💚

It's important to take time for yourself. If that means stepping back and getting your heart in the right place, do it. No apologies required.
Mental health is a part of your wellbeing.  Take it serious. No judgment just love.

No apologies required, Susan. I've had to take breaks occasionally as well. Reading through all of the news stories for articles to post can play havoc with my mental state at times. That's probably I don't interact with people on the site as much as I used to. We all need to take time off for 'mental health' once in a while.

As you are here for the community, the community will be here for you. Welcome back.

Love always -- Jessica Rose

Welcome back Susan. 

I too need breaks and have taken them.

Your sharing was missed.  Step out and pause as needed for a break.
We all need time to refresh.  It is because we are human.


Hugs,

Chrissy

Quote from: Susan on May 05, 2026, 03:23:02 PMI'm back.

✅️👍🏼😀🫂💝

Quoteeverything feels heavier than it should

I must echo some of your wisdom back to you: it was as heavy as it was. It still is as heavy as it is.

Quotethe words don't come the way they normally do. Part of what happened is that I just shut down. Not by choice exactly, more like the system protecting itself by going offline for a while. I'm embarrassed to admit that I knew people were worried about me, and even that wasn't enough to pull me out of it. That's how dark a place it was.

So well put. I know the feelings. Overwhelm. Exhaustion.

QuoteThis community deserves better than a version of me that's just going through the motions.

This community is here for you, too. We celebrate when each of us is strong and wise. Even the strongest and wisest need comfort and nurturance.

On the other hand, thank you for letting your staff take over when you needed to recede.

QuoteThis site has the staff it does because they care about it the way I do, and that showed in every day I wasn't here.

This site has the staff it does because their predecessors and you invested so much into building this community to be what it has become. The members and passers-by are here because of your vision and dedication and commitment and sacrifice. That momentum continues when you step away to catch your breath and replenish your energy.

QuoteI know what it means when someone you count on goes quiet, and I know this site has people in it who don't have many other places to turn. Letting you down is the part of all this that's hardest to sit with.

I feel your pain and disappointment. Thank you for taking care of yourself and coming back.

QuoteI'm here now, and I'm going to start the massive job of catching up on over a month's worth of posts.

Thank you for this place being here. Thank you for your inspiration, wisdom, and support. May you, too, find the comfort here that you give so generously.

Its always the right thing to take time for yourself when you need it. Something I learned the hard way in the last 18 months or so.
I'm glad you are feeling better, welcome back.

Big hug dear, its good you are back. Keep up the positiveness.

Dear Susan,

I am so glad that you are able to be back with us on the forum.  I have been so worried about you and sincerely hope that you are feeling better than you were.  I am so sorry for the darkness that you have had to walk through in the last month.  That darkness can be so debilitating and so difficult.  I want to be there for you with the same love, support, and care that you have shown to me and so many others.   

I love you Susan.

With so much love and care,
Amy