Community Conversation => Transitioning => Gender Correction Surgery => Topic started by: CosmicJoke on June 28, 2026, 06:08:16 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Is this really the "end" of the journey?
Post by: CosmicJoke on June 28, 2026, 06:08:16 PM
Post by: CosmicJoke on June 28, 2026, 06:08:16 PM
Hi everyone. I have currently been going to a therapist as a prerequisite for a vaginoplasty. I guess now that this goal is within my reach I am starting to question if this is really the "end" of the journey.
I personally am not of the school of thought that gender and sex are the same thing. I don't think I would want to let my looks go or stop being feminine just because I "have a vagina now" for example.
These are just some of the questions I am asking myself. I find it interesting because I don't think it really "stops" just because you had surgery.
I'm just interested in what some other people here think!
I personally am not of the school of thought that gender and sex are the same thing. I don't think I would want to let my looks go or stop being feminine just because I "have a vagina now" for example.
These are just some of the questions I am asking myself. I find it interesting because I don't think it really "stops" just because you had surgery.
I'm just interested in what some other people here think!
Title: Re: Is this really the "end" of the journey?
Post by: Allie Jayne on June 28, 2026, 06:44:36 PM
Post by: Allie Jayne on June 28, 2026, 06:44:36 PM
My take is that we affirm our gender to find peace, and this can be different for everyone. Not everyone needs to 'complete' medical transition as much as possible, and many find peace with social transition alone.
I lived my life with gender incongruence, and my genitals were a significant trigger for me. But I didn't really need to be functionally female down there, just visibly feminine, so I opted for minimum depth vulvaplasty. 5 years post op, I am still happy with that option.
The procedure to get bottom surgery included a 'real life test' back then. So to satisfy my surgeons criteria I socially transitioned, even though I had mixed feelings about doing it. People told me different things, from the surgery would significantly reduce my dysphoria, to the surgery won't make a difference to my dysphoria, but my experience was that it mostly eliminated my dysphoria. To the point that I considered if I had started with bottom surgery, I might not have needed to socially transition and disrupt my former life.
But everybody is different. A lot of my trans friends prioritise social transition, so opt for facial surgery, breast surgery, hair transplants, and hair removal as priorities. So the question is when do we finish transition? Well, basically it is when we find peace. For some people this will simply mean occasional dressing to our gender. Others need to completely change their lives and body as much as possible. This may also depend on the time in your life, ie, you may find that occasional dressing works in your 20's, but you need to go further as you grow older.
So there is no set beginning or end, but whatever gives us peace as individuals!
Hugs,
Allie
I lived my life with gender incongruence, and my genitals were a significant trigger for me. But I didn't really need to be functionally female down there, just visibly feminine, so I opted for minimum depth vulvaplasty. 5 years post op, I am still happy with that option.
The procedure to get bottom surgery included a 'real life test' back then. So to satisfy my surgeons criteria I socially transitioned, even though I had mixed feelings about doing it. People told me different things, from the surgery would significantly reduce my dysphoria, to the surgery won't make a difference to my dysphoria, but my experience was that it mostly eliminated my dysphoria. To the point that I considered if I had started with bottom surgery, I might not have needed to socially transition and disrupt my former life.
But everybody is different. A lot of my trans friends prioritise social transition, so opt for facial surgery, breast surgery, hair transplants, and hair removal as priorities. So the question is when do we finish transition? Well, basically it is when we find peace. For some people this will simply mean occasional dressing to our gender. Others need to completely change their lives and body as much as possible. This may also depend on the time in your life, ie, you may find that occasional dressing works in your 20's, but you need to go further as you grow older.
So there is no set beginning or end, but whatever gives us peace as individuals!
Hugs,
Allie
Title: Re: Is this really the "end" of the journey?
Post by: KathyLauren on June 28, 2026, 07:47:36 PM
Post by: KathyLauren on June 28, 2026, 07:47:36 PM
I figure that the end of the journey will be when I am no longer alive. Until then, the transition part of my journey may be slow, but only because I got to my destination. That doesn't mean I can't still go on sightseeing trips now and then.
Title: Re: Is this really the "end" of the journey?
Post by: Maid Marion on June 28, 2026, 07:57:02 PM
Post by: Maid Marion on June 28, 2026, 07:57:02 PM
No HRT or surgery but I look enough like a small petite woman and have the expected walk, mannerisms, and voice I have "passing privilege." I've regained enough balance from my stroke to hover over the toilet as long as necessary, something commonly done in public rest rooms.
But I'm constantly learning new things.
Marion
But I'm constantly learning new things.
Marion