Community Conversation => Transitioning => Voice Therapy and Surgery => Topic started by: Shannonymous on July 12, 2026, 08:09:40 AM Return to Full Version
Title: The hardest thing...
Post by: Shannonymous on July 12, 2026, 08:09:40 AM
Post by: Shannonymous on July 12, 2026, 08:09:40 AM
Voice training has been the absolute hardest and most frustrating part of my transition. I have dropped thousands of dollars on lessons from multiple people, spent hour after hour practicing and recording myself, and all for what? Nothing as far as I can tell. I can raise my pitch. I can reduce vocal weight. I can change my resonance. But when I try to put them together, I sound like an absolute parody of a woman, and it triggers more dysphoria than anything else.
I've been considering VFS, hoping that if the pitch were raised on its own and I could just concentrate on the other aspects of voice training, I'd have more luck. (Plus, I would no longer have the ability to cheat and just default back to my male voice....)
Any tips or tricks that anyone here can give me? Or any relevant experiences post VFS?
I've been considering VFS, hoping that if the pitch were raised on its own and I could just concentrate on the other aspects of voice training, I'd have more luck. (Plus, I would no longer have the ability to cheat and just default back to my male voice....)
Any tips or tricks that anyone here can give me? Or any relevant experiences post VFS?
Title: Re: The hardest thing...
Post by: Devlyn on July 12, 2026, 08:35:22 AM
Post by: Devlyn on July 12, 2026, 08:35:22 AM
I wouldn't give up my Boston accent for anything, and besides, I've talked the same way for over 60 years now. I have no desire to change the way I speak. Sometimes when I talk to someone they'll start with female pronouns and switch to male during the conversation. That's fine with me.
So basically I'm not answering your questions, but I just wanted to say you're absolutely nailing the art of putting your posts in the right subforums. 🙂
Hugs, Devlyn
So basically I'm not answering your questions, but I just wanted to say you're absolutely nailing the art of putting your posts in the right subforums. 🙂
Hugs, Devlyn
Title: Re: The hardest thing...
Post by: Shannonymous on July 12, 2026, 09:11:06 AM
Post by: Shannonymous on July 12, 2026, 09:11:06 AM
Quote from: Devlyn on Today at 08:35:22 AMI just wanted to say you're absolutely nailing the art of putting your posts in the right subforums. 🙂
I may be new to this forum, but I am a veteran of many a forum in the days before social media. I've missed it--glad to find this place!!!!
Title: Re: The hardest thing...
Post by: tgirlamg on July 12, 2026, 09:53:21 AM
Post by: tgirlamg on July 12, 2026, 09:53:21 AM
@Shannonymous
Welcome Aboard Sister!
I had similar experience with lessons, paractice and coaching etc... when I could kind of make it happen in controlled conditions... it would all go out the window in real world conditions and I would be misgendered on the phone... I also was bugged that I had to do all these "tricks" just to speak... I wanted my voice to just be... my voice!
I had VFS in 2017... it was slow recovery, I lost a lot of vocal power, and took me almost two years to get to a good place power wise... it is still a bit difficult to make myself easily heard in loud environments but, in everyday situations, no issues!... I do a lot of public speaking at the local university and other venues and have no problems... I no longer have to think about it, what comes out naturally is my voice without "tricks" and now, I am always gendered correctly on the phone.
Seattle Voice Lab on YouTube seems to have really good tips that are much easier to connect with than much of the coaching I received in early days if you want to try more on your own!
May Your Vocal Journey Be Blessed Sister!
Ashley 💕
Welcome Aboard Sister!
I had similar experience with lessons, paractice and coaching etc... when I could kind of make it happen in controlled conditions... it would all go out the window in real world conditions and I would be misgendered on the phone... I also was bugged that I had to do all these "tricks" just to speak... I wanted my voice to just be... my voice!
I had VFS in 2017... it was slow recovery, I lost a lot of vocal power, and took me almost two years to get to a good place power wise... it is still a bit difficult to make myself easily heard in loud environments but, in everyday situations, no issues!... I do a lot of public speaking at the local university and other venues and have no problems... I no longer have to think about it, what comes out naturally is my voice without "tricks" and now, I am always gendered correctly on the phone.
Seattle Voice Lab on YouTube seems to have really good tips that are much easier to connect with than much of the coaching I received in early days if you want to try more on your own!
May Your Vocal Journey Be Blessed Sister!
Ashley 💕