Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi all:
Apologies as I haven't posted in a while and this seems like the place to get something off my chest as well as get some feedback. I retired a bit early from where I used to work at a public R-1 university in IT. While there, I got a second bachelors in psychology, retired in Jan 2025 and started an MSW program. I am almost done, with 6 credits to go this fall semester. For background, I originally wanted to go into clinical work with LGBT populations and possibly do play therapy with adults in a cooking/vocational type of situation. Both are very niche. My internships weren't clinical really, one was in a school district doing half hour sessions with students and the other was in a hospital burn ward. Previous to this, I did 31 years in IT support, being a supervisor when I retired. Prior to IT has some human services experience with a justice foundation, CPS and a shelter for runaway and homeless youth.

What's kind of pinging me is some of the general attitudes in social work and other factors that lead to some of the structural issues within it. I thought being trans would give me more insight that it has, but I think having been socialized as a male and probably having developed having testosterone in my body has kind of made me somewhere in between. I can see both sides, and it IT, it was heavy male and at times I found that difficult, but in social work, it's a little maddening.

Social work is probably 90% women, in work and in my classes. In the work, I see crazy caseloads, abusive management, high burnout, high turnover and a lot of cliquishness and tribal stuff I didn't see as much in IT. Women can be much meaner and unaccepting than men, IMO. The thing is, I have to wonder if social work were 50% men, would the same problems exist? It kind of reminds me of domestic abuse victims that put up with all sorts of stuff. I guess to boil it down, I feel like I don't fit in and I see a lot of behaviors that don't seem effective in dealing with the problems of the work.

Has anyone here felt that being trans, while giving us a unique perspective, also leaves us not being fish or fowl and trying to find our place is harder than most? Second question is more related to social work and also other helping professions: Being trans, how have you navigated what I am experiencing if you have experienced it or have insight into it? I am starting to feel like I wasted my time. What made this easy is that because I worked in a university system, I still get the tuition benefits in retirement. Maybe I would have been better off in a pay.d or LPC program as it the approach is a little different and the demographics might be too. I like the biopsychosocial systems approach with social work, but I just feel like I don't fit and calling anything out/for what it is, it highly unpopular.

Maybe it's a factor of age, I am 64 now, but compared others in my generation that I know, I am much more progressive. What triggered this is a post on an association for the profession where a social worker stated she supported trump. You could see how that went, but what shocked me was that the attitude was avoiding the elephant in the room and maintaining some sort of professional distance that in my mind seemed to be from them being non-confrontational. In general, I find people who are CIS females more likely to be like that. IDK. Maybe I have a 5'2 sicilian in my body and like to go after stuff.

Thanks for reading/listening, I appreciate it and I look forward to any replies.

Hi Gertrude

Its a filter problem the five letters after 'f' are parsed and we are left with a famous four letter swear word missing a 'u' after the 'f' hence why the word was <bleeped>

I thought it was fixed but apparently it has not been I will raise the issue with Danielle our administrator.

As you can see I just tested it again and it got bleeped in the preview.  I took a screenshot.

Best Wishes Always
Sarah B
Global Moderator
@Gertrude @Northern Star Girl

@Gertrude   cc: Sarah B

The censored word problem for  feedback  is now fixed.

Sorry for the problem.   Note:  I edited your posting with the fixes.

Danielle [Northern Star Girl]
   Forum Administrator    Direct Email alaskandanielle@yahoo.com

hii Gertrude!

and welcome back to Susan's 💖,

wow there's a lot going here and I  can understand why you're feeling frustrated... what stood out to me is that you still seem to have a interest in clinical work, with the LGBT populations.

I wonder whether you're questioning social work itself or whether you're disappointed by the professional environments you've encountered.

I hear you... it's discouraging when a profession built around helping people doesn't always reflect the compassion, cooperation, and acceptance we might expect from it. Unfortunately, people can carry the same workplace politics, cliques, and interpersonal conflicts into any profession, even one centered on empathy and social justice.

I also found your reflections on being transgender and feeling caught between social worlds interesting... but I don't think being trans means you don't fully belong in either world.

I can agree somewhat that women can be meaner or less accepting than men, and I think the dynamics of a workplace can influence that experience, but I'll be cautious about generalizing those experiences to women as a whole.

since you're so close to completing your MSW, I think you can explore the clinical opportunities available to you before deciding whether you need another degree, maybe the kind of work you envisioned is possible in a different setting, with better supervision and a better workplace.

I'm in a similar situation not exactly IT or clinical but my previous work experience consisted of a Male dominant environment as well and with my medical and social transitioning I am considering a more feminine environment for my own occupational too.

I'm curious if you could work in the kind of clinical setting you envisioned, with a supportive team and the opportunity to make a difference in people's lives, would you still want to pursue social work?


~ Lilis 🌷

Hmmm, I wonder if it is more to do with the line of work you are doing.

I am not out but I work in an admin team that is and always has been an exclusively female role. I am accepted as I am, I am treated like one of the girls and I recieve zero coldness, meanness or animosity from my co-workers. I suspect they probably know I might be trans though it has not been mentined directly. It is a small team of 5. We are an admin team that supports an all male team of building inspectors and management and I feel that I am fully accepted as one of the female support team rather than part of that male team if that makes sense. So from my experience I would disagree about your assesment of female co-workers.

However the field you are in deals with some very traumatic cases I imagine, you will deal with some harrowing stories and this, I think, causes people including women to become colder and harder to cope with it. I have noticed the same is true with nurses and doctors. It is a coping mechanism and likely not a reflection on you or your trans status. There are of course the odd individuals who will have problems with transwomen but for you to feel the whole workforce is like this suggests it is not an anti-trans agenda.

I would not take it to heart. If you have a true passion for the work you are doing I would try to accept it for what it is. However, if it is still giving you issues then I think a different female typical carreer path would not necessarily have the same feel to it.

I hope that helps but bear in mind that is simply my opinion based on my admittedly limited experience!

Quote from: Lilis on <strong>Today</strong> at 03:29:28 AMhii Gertrude!

and welcome back to Susan's 💖,

wow there's a lot going here and I  can understand why you're feeling frustrated... what stood out to me is that you still seem to have a interest in clinical work, with the LGBT populations.

I wonder whether you're questioning social work itself or whether you're disappointed by the professional environments you've encountered.

I hear you... it's discouraging when a profession built around helping people doesn't always reflect the compassion, cooperation, and acceptance we might expect from it. Unfortunately, people can carry the same workplace politics, cliques, and interpersonal conflicts into any profession, even one centered on empathy and social justice.

I also found your reflections on being transgender and feeling caught between social worlds interesting... but I don't think being trans means you don't fully belong in either world.

I can agree somewhat that women can be meaner or less accepting than men, and I think the dynamics of a workplace can influence that experience, but I'll be cautious about generalizing those experiences to women as a whole.

since you're so close to completing your MSW, I think you can explore the clinical opportunities available to you before deciding whether you need another degree, maybe the kind of work you envisioned is possible in a different setting, with better supervision and a better workplace.

I'm in a similar situation not exactly IT or clinical but my previous work experience consisted of a Male dominant environment as well and with my medical and social transitioning I am considering a more feminine environment for my own occupational too.

I'm curious if you could work in the kind of clinical setting you envisioned, with a supportive team and the opportunity to make a difference in people's lives, would you still want to pursue social work?


~ Lilis 🌷

I've never seen a profession/environments where empathy and compassion are at the center of the work, but not there with peers. I also think how the industry functions is a direct result of the demographic that dominates it, just as I see it with IT. It's not a comfortable conversation to have. Anyway, to answer your question, I've realized is that finding one's tribe counts for a lot. I just don't know if that exists for me in that work. No more degrees for me. My discourse was should I have taken a different path in this. Doesn't matter at this point. Really, I want to do something that has some variety. Maybe individual, maybe group, maybe in vivo, which is what the vocational stuff could be like. Clinical can be too clinical.

Quote from: Stottie Girl on <strong>Today</strong> at 03:52:34 AMHmmm, I wonder if it is more to do with the line of work you are doing.

I am not out but I work in an admin team that is and always has been an exclusively female role. I am accepted as I am, I am treated like one of the girls and I recieve zero coldness, meanness or animosity from my co-workers. I suspect they probably know I might be trans though it has not been mentined directly. It is a small team of 5. We are an admin team that supports an all male team of building inspectors and management and I feel that I am fully accepted as one of the female support team rather than part of that male team if that makes sense. So from my experience I would disagree about your assesment of female co-workers.

However the field you are in deals with some very traumatic cases I imagine, you will deal with some harrowing stories and this, I think, causes people including women to become colder and harder to cope with it. I have noticed the same is true with nurses and doctors. It is a coping mechanism and likely not a reflection on you or your trans status. There are of course the odd individuals who will have problems with transwomen but for you to feel the whole workforce is like this suggests it is not an anti-trans agenda.

I would not take it to heart. If you have a true passion for the work you are doing I would try to accept it for what it is. However, if it is still giving you issues then I think a different female typical carreer path would not necessarily have the same feel to it.

I hope that helps but bear in mind that is simply my opinion based on my admittedly limited experience!

I could see the environments leading to that coping style, but considering the work in terms of knowledge, I would hope for some self-awareness and seeking help. I found going to therapy once a month very helpful as I don't want to take it home or be a d at work. My comment about trans status is more about perspective and the industries I worked in, one male dominated and one female dominated. While the work itself is contributory to this in a big way, I think the other demographics have a huge influence in some ways too. Another thing is, my therapist, who is an LCSW has told me my experiences aren't unique (he's male). He just said to expect certain things and like the questions here, finding one's tribe seems to be a theme.

Yes, I saw things I can't unsee at the burn unit.

Welcome back, Trudie. 🙂

Welcome back, Trudie!

I think you could do a lot of good if, as you said, you could find your tribe. My therapist at the VA Clinic is a polyamorous LCSW with a transgender child. Her supervisor is transgender. So, even though the general "government agency" policies are hostile, good people are working in the trenches to help us cope with the politics and life in general.

I wouldn't rule out a clinical setting entirely. There are opportunities out there. When I opened my hypnotherapy practice (pre-transition), I received several offers to work with local healthcare clinics.

I wouldn't change course because the river is rough. I expect that to change. The important decision is whether this is what you want to do. If so, then find a way to do it. You might work with a local clinic or LGBTQ Support Group, write self-help books, or set up your own practice.

With your experience, you could do a lot of good. With what you have seen of issues in the "system," your work might even change some of that.

Fair enough Trudie. I'm going to jump out of this conversation because there are too many acronyms flying about!! I have no idea what an MSW is nor a LCSW 🤣🤣

Quote from: Stottie Girl on <strong>Today</strong> at 11:29:36 AMFair enough Trudie. I'm going to jump out of this conversation because there are too many acronyms flying about!! I have no idea what an MSW is nor a LCSW 🤣🤣

Masters in Social Work and Licensed Clinical Social Worker. In between the two is LMSW, whick is an associate or provisional license. License Master Social Worker. That's where one would do the clinical hours to be able to take the test for LCSW and if one passes, they can hang their own shingle. That's 2-3000 hours of work with supervision.

Quote from: Lori Dee on <strong>Today</strong> at 09:48:17 AMWelcome back, Trudie!

I think you could do a lot of good if, as you said, you could find your tribe. My therapist at the VA Clinic is a polyamorous LCSW with a transgender child. Her supervisor is transgender. So, even though the general "government agency" policies are hostile, good people are working in the trenches to help us cope with the politics and life in general.

I wouldn't rule out a clinical setting entirely. There are opportunities out there. When I opened my hypnotherapy practice (pre-transition), I received several offers to work with local healthcare clinics.

I wouldn't change course because the river is rough. I expect that to change. The important decision is whether this is what you want to do. If so, then find a way to do it. You might work with a local clinic or LGBTQ Support Group, write self-help books, or set up your own practice.

With your experience, you could do a lot of good. With what you have seen of issues in the "system," your work might even change some of that.

Maybe it's age or just repetative stress injury from working a long time, but I am little tired in general. It's like I don't have the eneragy I used to and I don't have the patience for stuff that I find...problematic. It's kind of what led to me retiring. We got new management and their policy was that managing up was all that mattered and they had some goofy promotions with the wrong folks. Of course I had to be honest about it, and a few levels up, I there was actually some agreement, but no fixes. Me and two other supervisors left in 8 months with a total of 40 years org experience. I just felt my values weren't respected and honored, so I took my leave. The US is plagued with a lack or accountability in our management and leadership structures or at least not accountable in a way that benefits society as a whole. As much as we understand it from a psychosocial perspective, like dark triad/tetrad, we haven't figured out how to fix it. So when I see an application of that in social work, it's even more surprising in the sense of understanding it, but just as that's so, it also goes along that they are ineffective in dealing with it. The TLDR is, they need to unionize. Unfortunately, the left has become feckless with change over time. They bring flowers to a gun fight and wonder why they always lose.

Anyway, I've babbled too long.

Quote from: Gertrude on <strong>Today</strong> at 03:08:38 PMMaybe it's age or just repetative stress injury from working a long time, but I am little tired in general. It's like I don't have the eneragy I used to and I don't have the patience for stuff that I find...problematic. It's kind of what led to me retiring.

This was me too. Eventually, I realized I just didn't want to deal with OPP (Other People's Problems); I just wanted to be retired. I sold my practice, bought an old pickup truck, built a camper on the back, and moved to South Dakota. I spent the next ten years gold mining, and I never looked back. I still feel for people who are suffering, but all we can do is offer advice. It is up to them to make the changes they need. Now I am back home in Colorado, writing books. I hope to get back to gold mining next Spring.

Good luck with whatever you decide.