Site News and Information => Introductions => Topic started by: the softer side of me on July 13, 2008, 05:10:10 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: the softer side of me on July 13, 2008, 05:10:10 AM
Post by: the softer side of me on July 13, 2008, 05:10:10 AM
A little about myself first...
I'm a little web/forum savvy and I believe it's always nice to introduce yourself before asking advice and spewing opinions!
I'm in my late 30's and very happily married for 15+ years and have two terrific kids. My wife somewhere between tolerating and accepting my 'hobby'. My kids are (hopefully) unaware. I say hopefully because my 'hobby' is strictly sexually driven and not about what I wish to be. I've come to that conclusion after years of thought and am pretty comfortable with it.
One of the most positive aspects of my 'hobby' is the ability to realize that people are people whatever shape/colour/preference they may choose. Likewise for those not benefitted by choice.
So, my hobby?
As the board name would suggest, I have discovered the softer side of myself and enjoy some of the finer garments intended for ladies. I like to dress up but I love being a guy! In my 'perfect world' I would like to be able wear (outside) anything I want to fit the mood I'm in. I've been out in ladies cargo-style shorts with a men's polo, croc's to match the shorts, Silks stay-ups and really subtle lipstick. I purchased a few items while dressed, the most risque being a corsette. What a rush! Nothing was said but I don't know if anyone noticed. I did receive a bit of a 'look' from an older female employee at a payless whilst looking at size 13 ankle boots with a 3" heel. I didn't have the guts to try them on and regret not buying them. Gotta love Payless!
I'm a larger guy and would never be passable. I'm not sure I would want to be passable but I can say with certainty that I wish I was smaller and possibly try!
My wife knows and is somewhat supportive but she has her limits. No bras. She's cool with wearing in the bedroom but appreciates it when we have a balance between dressed and undressed. I'm not about to push the envelope (too much!).
For wearing out of the house - nothing can be seen and she'd prefer that I didn't wear anything femme in case I 'hit by a bus' LOL!!
We have a pretty good handle on my hobby - sometimes she'll even pick something out for me or I can call her at work and ask her to pick up stockings on the way home.
One day, I would LOVE to take her out of town and wear the femme/guy blend (in good taste of course) and live some of our bedroom fantasies!
Thanks for having me here and it was fun to post all that - nobody else knows! Now I have to go wake up my wife for a panty party!
the softer side of me
I'm a little web/forum savvy and I believe it's always nice to introduce yourself before asking advice and spewing opinions!
I'm in my late 30's and very happily married for 15+ years and have two terrific kids. My wife somewhere between tolerating and accepting my 'hobby'. My kids are (hopefully) unaware. I say hopefully because my 'hobby' is strictly sexually driven and not about what I wish to be. I've come to that conclusion after years of thought and am pretty comfortable with it.
One of the most positive aspects of my 'hobby' is the ability to realize that people are people whatever shape/colour/preference they may choose. Likewise for those not benefitted by choice.
So, my hobby?
As the board name would suggest, I have discovered the softer side of myself and enjoy some of the finer garments intended for ladies. I like to dress up but I love being a guy! In my 'perfect world' I would like to be able wear (outside) anything I want to fit the mood I'm in. I've been out in ladies cargo-style shorts with a men's polo, croc's to match the shorts, Silks stay-ups and really subtle lipstick. I purchased a few items while dressed, the most risque being a corsette. What a rush! Nothing was said but I don't know if anyone noticed. I did receive a bit of a 'look' from an older female employee at a payless whilst looking at size 13 ankle boots with a 3" heel. I didn't have the guts to try them on and regret not buying them. Gotta love Payless!
I'm a larger guy and would never be passable. I'm not sure I would want to be passable but I can say with certainty that I wish I was smaller and possibly try!
My wife knows and is somewhat supportive but she has her limits. No bras. She's cool with wearing in the bedroom but appreciates it when we have a balance between dressed and undressed. I'm not about to push the envelope (too much!).
For wearing out of the house - nothing can be seen and she'd prefer that I didn't wear anything femme in case I 'hit by a bus' LOL!!
We have a pretty good handle on my hobby - sometimes she'll even pick something out for me or I can call her at work and ask her to pick up stockings on the way home.
One day, I would LOVE to take her out of town and wear the femme/guy blend (in good taste of course) and live some of our bedroom fantasies!
Thanks for having me here and it was fun to post all that - nobody else knows! Now I have to go wake up my wife for a panty party!
the softer side of me
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: Candlelight on July 13, 2008, 05:58:50 AM
Post by: Candlelight on July 13, 2008, 05:58:50 AM
Welcome to the boards softer. This is a very good place to be.
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: barbie on July 14, 2008, 01:35:51 AM
Post by: barbie on July 14, 2008, 01:35:51 AM
Thanks for your introduction.
I wish it is a kind of hobby to me, and many people think so.
I think you have better use a nickname in this site.
See you,
Barbie~~
I wish it is a kind of hobby to me, and many people think so.
I think you have better use a nickname in this site.
See you,
Barbie~~
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: NicholeW. on July 14, 2008, 12:13:18 PM
Post by: NicholeW. on July 14, 2008, 12:13:18 PM
Welocme to Susan's, Softer Side,
As you've probably seen we are a diverse group of folks here who mostly get along pretty well together. I'm sure you'll fit right in.
You might want to go to the "Announcements" section and read the two posts "Post Ranks" and "Reputation Rules" to help you with some knowledge about when you can apply your own avatars, PM, and what those lil stars mean beneath all of our names and how to get them for yourself as well!!
I hope you'll enjoy your stay at Susan's and just jump right in when you feel like it and post replies or start threads of your own.
All the very best to you, :icon_flower:
Nichole
As you've probably seen we are a diverse group of folks here who mostly get along pretty well together. I'm sure you'll fit right in.
You might want to go to the "Announcements" section and read the two posts "Post Ranks" and "Reputation Rules" to help you with some knowledge about when you can apply your own avatars, PM, and what those lil stars mean beneath all of our names and how to get them for yourself as well!!
I hope you'll enjoy your stay at Susan's and just jump right in when you feel like it and post replies or start threads of your own.
All the very best to you, :icon_flower:
Nichole
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: tinkerbell on July 14, 2008, 08:45:30 PM
Post by: tinkerbell on July 14, 2008, 08:45:30 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi220.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fdd141%2Fgoldendragonfly%2FTinkerbell-2-5.gif&hash=5be8480c960ef48b1799ad2adf2134b3c3a7c712)
Hello there and welcome to Susan's!
Thanks so much for introducing yourself. Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)before posting, and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Main_Page), chat (https://www.susans.org/chat/index.html), and the links listed at the main page. (https://www.susans.org/index.html); We look forward to your future posts and participation. Enjoy your stay :)
tink :icon_chick:
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: the softer side of me on July 15, 2008, 05:46:11 AM
Post by: the softer side of me on July 15, 2008, 05:46:11 AM
Thank-you for the welcomes!
Over the years I've questioned my orientation, I've purged, I've kept it to myself, I've opened up to my wife but I have never had to deal with the struggles that so many others have faced. The term 'hobby' was not intended to trivialize the matter but only to put my matter into perspective.
When I reflect, the toughest part of this matter was assuring my wife that I was happy in our marriage, not looking for anything else and that I am still the person she married.
So with that said, I think I have things all figured out but here's the contridiction - it's nice to find a forum like this that can re-affirm that I'm not a freak nor am I the only guy in the world that enjoys wearing lingerie. If I was completely comfortable with myself, would I be looking for affirmation? Hmmmm, why am I here? LOL!!
Softer Side
Over the years I've questioned my orientation, I've purged, I've kept it to myself, I've opened up to my wife but I have never had to deal with the struggles that so many others have faced. The term 'hobby' was not intended to trivialize the matter but only to put my matter into perspective.
When I reflect, the toughest part of this matter was assuring my wife that I was happy in our marriage, not looking for anything else and that I am still the person she married.
So with that said, I think I have things all figured out but here's the contridiction - it's nice to find a forum like this that can re-affirm that I'm not a freak nor am I the only guy in the world that enjoys wearing lingerie. If I was completely comfortable with myself, would I be looking for affirmation? Hmmmm, why am I here? LOL!!
Softer Side
Title: Re: Cool place, thought I'd join in!
Post by: NicholeW. on July 15, 2008, 08:18:15 AM
Post by: NicholeW. on July 15, 2008, 08:18:15 AM
Quote from: the softer side of me on July 15, 2008, 05:46:11 AM
... If I was completely comfortable with myself, would I be looking for affirmation? Hmmmm, why am I here? LOL!!
I think we all need affirmation, Softer Side. That many males have been socialized through a system like the self-actualized ego to be thinking that they should just be able and willing to affirm themselves and to heck with the rest of us doesn't seem a healthy way to go about things to me anyhow.
No one is a rock or an island and we need to receive the plaudits and "attagirls" or "attaboys" from others. We all crave for acceptance and a feeling of community. I believe that that is why we term ourselves "social animals." We are. We tend to be rather helpless and or lonely and ill without the basic needs of companionship and having people who "know us."
Hon, there are no "self-made" people; we all require others to assist us in growth and collegiality. No shame in discovering that; in fact, there's a lot of healthy benefits that flow from it.
And yes, there are other CDs, or people who fit into the CD-spectrum, who post here as well. You are not alone in that respect. You'll meet them and I think finding that one isn't the only one and has others to talk with about one's self and one's experience and get their input is a very needful thing for us all.
I hope you stick around to discover that is true.
Hugs,
Nichole