Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: jonjon on September 28, 2008, 05:20:17 AM Return to Full Version
Title: it's getting scary
Post by: jonjon on September 28, 2008, 05:20:17 AM
Post by: jonjon on September 28, 2008, 05:20:17 AM
I know i'm posting a lot today - just boredom and impatient about the 7th i guess.
But... i know i've been in this 20 months already... but i feel like my journey is only just beginning. And... with this realisation, i'm feeling kinda scared. It's not a 'i want out now' scared, it's an 'excited, i cant wait to see how things go, but wish someone was there to hold my hand' scared.
Just sat watching a few vids on youtube about FTM's vlogs from T to bottom surgery.
I'm realising i'm about to experience one of the most amazing journey's only a selection of lucky humans get to experience. It makes me feel proud to be trans, it makes me feel special to be one of the select few to experience this.
And all that is way way ahead of me... and i'm still here, still waiting for my first appointment with the endo. Still packing my bag so to speak.
But... i know i've been in this 20 months already... but i feel like my journey is only just beginning. And... with this realisation, i'm feeling kinda scared. It's not a 'i want out now' scared, it's an 'excited, i cant wait to see how things go, but wish someone was there to hold my hand' scared.
Just sat watching a few vids on youtube about FTM's vlogs from T to bottom surgery.
I'm realising i'm about to experience one of the most amazing journey's only a selection of lucky humans get to experience. It makes me feel proud to be trans, it makes me feel special to be one of the select few to experience this.
And all that is way way ahead of me... and i'm still here, still waiting for my first appointment with the endo. Still packing my bag so to speak.
Title: Re: it's getting scary
Post by: Elwood on September 28, 2008, 10:58:39 AM
Post by: Elwood on September 28, 2008, 10:58:39 AM
I personally don't feel very special... I just want to be a normal guy.
Title: Re: it's getting scary
Post by: jonjon on September 28, 2008, 11:02:44 AM
Post by: jonjon on September 28, 2008, 11:02:44 AM
most days i dont feel special either.
But today i do.
Just embracing it while it lasts as i know it wont last very long at all.
But today i do.
Just embracing it while it lasts as i know it wont last very long at all.
Title: Re: it's getting scary
Post by: iFindMeHere on September 29, 2008, 11:44:45 PM
Post by: iFindMeHere on September 29, 2008, 11:44:45 PM
see, you are better than cloud. He gets whiny!
Title: Re: it's getting scary
Post by: Jay on September 30, 2008, 03:09:57 AM
Post by: Jay on September 30, 2008, 03:09:57 AM
Quote from: Elwood on September 28, 2008, 10:58:39 AM
I personally don't feel very special... I just want to be a normal guy.
I feel like that too however, I do feel special that I am able to change to be me..