Susan's Place Transgender Resources

"How to Respect a Transsexual Person"
http://www.kisa.ca/respect.html

Just something I stumbled upon. Perhaps it is of value to someone.

Very Interesting. I think that anyone that reads this website should gain a much better understanding of what we are going through and the expectations that follow.

Gina

I like it. Maybe Ill use it someday...

Thanks,
Sarah :)

This is exactly something I needed to read.... Thanks so much for posting it Kimberly :)

I was struggling on how to describe myself.... most of the board is made up of women.... So I wasn't sure to refer myself as a birth woman, or what.... I saw someone use the term "GG" ... (whats that mean?)  In that article it says "non transexual woman"  that works!...

The only reason I make the distinction at all is exactly because of this article... I'm still learning, and trying to gain my footing... and trying to figure out how to help :)

I have seen GG described two ways (there may be more) , genetic girl and girly girl, both meaning a non-transsexual woman.









beth

A good article.  I can see where it would be good in my situation where i have just come out at work.  It answers a lot of simple questioins that can come up during those chats around the water cooler, ha, ha and other places as well.  I'm definitley taking it to work.  It has been bookmarked, printed and filed

thank you for a wonderful page

it helps me and others to put into words what we want to let people close to us know and may help those around us to understand more and feel more comfortable when talking. there is nothing worse than not knowing what to say to someone. i am sure this will help

i am printing a copy now and putting it in my bag for reference

An excellent article.

The points discussed are very valid, and I also feel they are applicable to crossdressers as well.

Why I mention that, is i feel  there are crossdressers, that while they are  transexual oriented, , are still considering transition, and they too should be afforded the same respect, until such times as they wish to come out and make their desires known

Denise Love

Each one of us transgenders is a person in their own right.  Each of us is just trying to come up right with our own selves whatever that is.   There is, in my mind, no stereo typical solution, except to do what feels good for our individual self within the context of each one of our lives.   What that looks like to non-transgenders who can tell.   Everyday I am changing and evolving what that means for me.    I know that I am female dominant,  but how much of that I am prepared to let the general public see,  I don't know.    I just go through the process of being comforable with myself,  learning more than becoming uncomfortable with myself,  stuggling to become comfortable again,  then repeating the process again and again.   I am a work in process,  just as we all are.   We share a common struggle and should respect and try and learn from each individual's struggle. :icon_bunch: :icon_chick: :icon_dance: :icon_suspicious:

i never meet any transexual people, which is a shame because i have no one to talk to about things....but if/when i do apart form myself i will try to respect the community as much as i can

I e-mailed 'How to Respect a Transexual Person" to a friend of mine.  He had mentioned months ago a friend of his who had recently come out to him, and I recalled my friend having a hard time with that. 

That was before I knew about this site, though... We were leaving each other offline messages about getting together before classes started again,(toolate now!) and I sent him that document...haven't heard from him since. 

Maybe he was offended because he thinks he knows it all already?  Or maybe he just needs more time to accept the situation.  We'll see what happens...either way, I'm glad I shared it with him. 

PS--Modifying this 9/1/05---Saw my friend yesterday and he only was busy which is why he hadn't gotten back with me...AND...he found 'How to Respect A Transexual Person' to be helpful. Hooray!

pretty nifty site, might use it when i come out to my parents...

The answer should be so simple, really............Just respect her/him as what s/he is, a human being....in other words....respect her/him the way you would like to be respected. Period.



tinkerbell

Yeah, I was thinking about this recently and I just want to be treated like you would treat any other woman.  That's as simple as it is really.

Melissa

respect it as the size of breasts, amount of liquor consumed, is she waering a black gicci dress?, how well is her make up applied,  :D :D

  am with tinker on this one, right girl?  ;)
sheila18

Quote from: sheila18 on August 01, 2006, 01:19:26 AM
respect it as the size of breasts, amount of liquor consumed, is she waering a black gicci dress?, how well is her make up applied,  :D :D

  am with tinker on this one, right girl?  ;)
sheila18

black gucci dress?  okay...I never thought of that one to tell you the truth....
Don't forget about Bloomingdales, Saks, and Cartier credit accounts, especially if they are on your spouse's name....LOL

tinkerbell  (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi100.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fm37%2Frianmarze%2F363p.gif&hash=fbf9bf51505d052ec903c548fa8fd055abc9e955)

Quote from: Tinkerbell on August 01, 2006, 01:35:29 AM
especially if they are on your spouse's name....LOL

tinkerbell 

mmmnh spouse's name?  ...I have never seriously consider that one,  food for thought, I mean just the whole thing of gainning more respect points by virtue of whom you marry. 
I know that people find it easier to respect me when am wearing Macy's as oppossed to Walmart's.  Materialistic?  This is the world were living in  as that 80's song said (Land of the Living?)
sheila18

Quote from: sheila18 on August 02, 2006, 12:53:12 AM
. 
I know that people find it easier to respect me when am wearing Macy's as oppossed to Walmart's.  Materialistic?  This is the world were living in  as that 80's song said (Land of the Living?)
sheila18

Sad but true.   Society in general tends to respect you more if you live up to the standards (so to speak).  However, the ironic thing is that most of those standards are artificial or unrealistic... :-\


tinkerbell

artificial/unrealistic just like this fellow---->   (https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi100.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fm37%2Frianmarze%2Fspiderdog7kr.jpg&hash=a1dd0723f80ed77cd919a46f019da912eb506e16)

Kimberly,
    I have copied this, thank you even though it has been here awhile. I need to take it with me today. I have a friend of 15 years who continues to use my old name and wrong pronouns in conversation past and present. My daughter is living with her right now so I have no choise as to be around her at this moment. She won't listen when I tell her, so hopefully she will read.

                                               Marco

Social Situations

   

Quote* If I blend well (i.e. I pass) or if I am online, then don't tell anyone I am transsexual unless they are too.

Why would another transexual need to know this information?

Without specific permission for one individual it is just not permissable to discuss anothers personal business.

If a friend is approached with a question , the proper response is "Go ask her/him"  I have been asked politely if I had "one of those".  My answer is usually "If you are not planning on sleeping with me, why do you ask?"  If the woman is really cute the answer is quite different.

I grant others the right of privacy.  I ask for the same.

Leigh

Something I have never really considered, I pass as a woman very well, so my treatment is very much that of a GG. Men hold doors, stand when I stand etc. etc.

Right, same here.  I pretty much avoid discussing gender issues unless somebody else brings it up (if they already know my history) or I'm in an environment that's specifically for discussing it.  Why?  Because talking about your gender issues forces people to look at you differently than other people of the gender you are trying to acclimate to.

Melissa

This thread prompted me to compose a piece at:

https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,5311.0.html

within the forums, my blog actually.

I had many problems dealing with other benders early on.  It was especially acute when I thought the association would prove me to be just like them. 

Cindi

Thanks Kimberly for posting this! (Dunno why I didn't see this thread before.) It's very good and if the situation warranted it I'd print it out, go over it with a hiliter, maybe even cross out/annotate one or two things, and hang it up on the wall. ;D