Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Anyone else find them horribly tedious?

Yeah.  You, It, Them, Us.  Whatever happened to He, She, Him and Her.  Is it that hard? ???

I'm talking about hir and ze and xie and all those other sets I can't ever remember.

OK I am confused ???

Instead of using male and female pronouns (he/she) some folks opt for fancy new gender-neutral ones like the few I put in my last post.  It seems most prevalent on college campuses and live journal from my amateur sleuthing.

OK I guess I haven't heard them then.  I had wondered about that in your last post.

I've never really heard them before  ???

I like the 'sie' and 'hir' versions. 'hym' isn't bad for more masculine folk.

Sometimes they're a pain and half the time with androgynes I end up accidently switching from he/she, him/her and back a lot.

I think it's more comfortable for some non-binary folk not to be called by binary pronouns. And I try to respect that even though I slip a lot.

OK I am the dumb dame.  Now I think I understand.

i usually only use them when im not sure which the person prefers.  or if i just dont know which (if either) the person is!

I don't have a problem with them.  Some people prefer them, usually androgynes, and I try to respect people's preferences.  There's nothing different about wanting to be called "ze" than there is about wanting to be called "he" or "she," imo. :)

Quote from: Janet Lynn on October 21, 2008, 12:19:05 AM
OK I am the dumb dame.  Now I think I understand.

No, we're just the old farts. ;D

I've read them on a few sites.  I guess I don't know any androgynes in real life who have asked to be called by gender-neutral pronouns.  In reality, how does that work with employers?


Jay

Jay,

Yeah, who can understand them.

Ive never heard of them either!

I used to be a he, now I am a she.

I really don't wish to be referred to as sie or hir.

Sorry if the androgynous folks wish to be referred to in the neutral, but I am NOT neutral!

-Sandy(it's SHE dammit!!!)

I never heard of them before coming to Susan's, but I'm still uncertain of when and how to use them. So, I try to craft my sentances in ways that avoid both gendered and genderless pronouns. It's not so much that I find them tedious, but that I find it hard to remember their proper usage. When to use sie as opposed to xie or ze? It's complicated, but so is gender identity.

I'm an androgyne, but I usually present as male. So, he/him/his works fine for me. Perhaps it is the genderBLEEP/genderqueer crowd who prefer the neutral? With such persons, as I understand, there is a greater imperative to use neutral words. I think of myself as more gender-fluid, so I prefer pronouns that are based on how I present.

I know there are others who don't share this point of view.

As far as I can tell, all the gender neutral pronouns are interchangeable.  For example, there's no difference in use between sie, xie, or ze- they're all the same.  It's just that they haven't been narrowed down to one, single, widely-accepted term, so people use whatever they're used to or whatever they think sounds best.  "Ze" was the first one I ever heard of, so it's the one I use the most.  But if I used "sie" instead, it would mean the exact same thing. :)

At first I had only met people online who preferred to be referred to with neutral pronouns, but I recently met two people in real life who prefer them, too, so I really don't like thinking about them as though they're somehow 'strange' or not as valid as gendered pronouns.

Oh, don't get me wrong. I don't think these pronouns are strange. Non-standard, yes, but that doesn't necessarily mean strange. Languages evolve over time, so there will always (it seems to me) be words that are at one time non-standard that will become standard at another.