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Title: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: Vicky on December 23, 2008, 01:34:15 AM
Post by: Vicky on December 23, 2008, 01:34:15 AM
Hi all, I'm Vicky. When I was born, the doctor told my mother and father I was a boy before he bothered to ask me. Now that I have outlived all three, maybe I can get the record straightened out and take time to be who I have really felt like for years.
I did the very bad look closet thing on crossdressing for about 10 years, hiding the stuff from the three very curious teenagers that I was raising as a single parent "dad". When they were finally out of the house for extended periods with school and first jobs, I had the chance to begin a better looking wardrobe and female presentation, as well as some time out of the house en-femme at spots like the old Queen Mary Show Lounge in the Hollywood area of LA. About six years ago, when I came out to two of my now adult children, it appears that I did not go a good job of locking the closet while I was raising them. They knew already, and while open on the idea at first, both of them told me. "but you are dad". Darn it, they do look like me!! Neither of them have seen more than a couple of pictures of Vicky, and that is their limit for the time being. My third now adult child is more open, and we have attended some social events as parent and offspring.
Ten years ago my youngest sister had mentioned that her clegyman spouse was beginning a church ministry for transgendered people. Six months later I found a link to their church web site, and found out that my up to then "brother-in-law" was transgendered too. Six months later, AFTER my first night out at an actual restaurant as Vicky, I came out to them and they helped me take my first girl pictures that I laugh at today because I was still making all the mistakes I had before, and was inventing new ones all the time.
They suggested a store that was gender friendly, where I could get help with my image (and that is listed in this site's resource list for crossdressers now) and found out that the owner of the store insisted that her MtF transgender clients look real and classy as females. That experience has set my standards for presenting as a female, and the store owner is now one of my very good friends. There are about 30 or so of us that know each other through being store patron, and we are at all stages of being trans, from people who are transitioning, who have completed SRS, who will never go through transition, etc.
I have been finding out over the past three years, that while I originally thought that Crossdressing would take care of my gender issues, I was wrong, and I am getting ready to begin psychological counseling for my gender issues when another issue related to some family deaths has been dealt with. The idea of HRT is definitely on my mind. I've got to admit that I am a little older than some of the posts here that I have browsed indicate their posters are, and this could put some brakes on going on to full SRS. The point is though that today, I do not rule the idea out. I only have a couple of years until I retire, and then it may be girl time for extended periods of time.
I was recently "outed" by a family member that learned about Vicky from someone whom I had known through a church and whom I thought was under clergy privilege and restriction about revealing confidences. This may be putting my volunteer work with two youth organizations in jeopardy, but the emphasis that I see here on youth issues makes me wonder if it may be time to be me as TG, and to put some of my energy toward young people with gender issues.
I hope to be a contributing member of this "community" and while I can be friendly and compassionate, I can also let an outrageous sense of humor loose from time to time. I do try to think before typing!!! Glad to be here.
I did the very bad look closet thing on crossdressing for about 10 years, hiding the stuff from the three very curious teenagers that I was raising as a single parent "dad". When they were finally out of the house for extended periods with school and first jobs, I had the chance to begin a better looking wardrobe and female presentation, as well as some time out of the house en-femme at spots like the old Queen Mary Show Lounge in the Hollywood area of LA. About six years ago, when I came out to two of my now adult children, it appears that I did not go a good job of locking the closet while I was raising them. They knew already, and while open on the idea at first, both of them told me. "but you are dad". Darn it, they do look like me!! Neither of them have seen more than a couple of pictures of Vicky, and that is their limit for the time being. My third now adult child is more open, and we have attended some social events as parent and offspring.
Ten years ago my youngest sister had mentioned that her clegyman spouse was beginning a church ministry for transgendered people. Six months later I found a link to their church web site, and found out that my up to then "brother-in-law" was transgendered too. Six months later, AFTER my first night out at an actual restaurant as Vicky, I came out to them and they helped me take my first girl pictures that I laugh at today because I was still making all the mistakes I had before, and was inventing new ones all the time.
They suggested a store that was gender friendly, where I could get help with my image (and that is listed in this site's resource list for crossdressers now) and found out that the owner of the store insisted that her MtF transgender clients look real and classy as females. That experience has set my standards for presenting as a female, and the store owner is now one of my very good friends. There are about 30 or so of us that know each other through being store patron, and we are at all stages of being trans, from people who are transitioning, who have completed SRS, who will never go through transition, etc.
I have been finding out over the past three years, that while I originally thought that Crossdressing would take care of my gender issues, I was wrong, and I am getting ready to begin psychological counseling for my gender issues when another issue related to some family deaths has been dealt with. The idea of HRT is definitely on my mind. I've got to admit that I am a little older than some of the posts here that I have browsed indicate their posters are, and this could put some brakes on going on to full SRS. The point is though that today, I do not rule the idea out. I only have a couple of years until I retire, and then it may be girl time for extended periods of time.
I was recently "outed" by a family member that learned about Vicky from someone whom I had known through a church and whom I thought was under clergy privilege and restriction about revealing confidences. This may be putting my volunteer work with two youth organizations in jeopardy, but the emphasis that I see here on youth issues makes me wonder if it may be time to be me as TG, and to put some of my energy toward young people with gender issues.
I hope to be a contributing member of this "community" and while I can be friendly and compassionate, I can also let an outrageous sense of humor loose from time to time. I do try to think before typing!!! Glad to be here.
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: tekla on December 23, 2008, 09:21:43 AM
Post by: tekla on December 23, 2008, 09:21:43 AM
The Queen Mary in LA, that's Old School. And what you said about kids is true too, you think your are hiding, but they see a lot more than we think they do, and sense even more.
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: sarahb on December 23, 2008, 09:39:22 AM
Post by: sarahb on December 23, 2008, 09:39:22 AM
No matter the age, it's never too late to realize who you are and take the steps necessary to live as yourself. It's great to hear that your sister is so accepting, as well as your children. I can imagine that's a huge load off your shoulders knowing that. It's good to have you here and I'm sure you'll enjoy the community on this site as well. There's a ton of great people here with insight, experiences, and support to offer and share.
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: katherine on December 23, 2008, 09:49:40 AM
Post by: katherine on December 23, 2008, 09:49:40 AM
Hi Vicky!
Welcome to Susan's. This is a very nice, friendly place. I too, am a bit older than most here and I believe there are a few who are older. I've been trying to play catch-up with the forums and now and then adding my two cents worth. Sounds like you are much further along in the "looks" area than I am. I'm dreadful. Can't even put my lipstick on straight! Anyway, it will be nice hearing more from you. Take care.
Welcome to Susan's. This is a very nice, friendly place. I too, am a bit older than most here and I believe there are a few who are older. I've been trying to play catch-up with the forums and now and then adding my two cents worth. Sounds like you are much further along in the "looks" area than I am. I'm dreadful. Can't even put my lipstick on straight! Anyway, it will be nice hearing more from you. Take care.
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: Chrissty on December 23, 2008, 11:35:13 AM
Post by: Chrissty on December 23, 2008, 11:35:13 AM
Hi Vicky
Welcome to Susan's,
....as Katherine says, there are a number of us here who have at least passed the half century...
Do take a look around, and feel free to post on any topics you ar interested in.
I'm sure someone will be along soon to tell you to check out our site rules etc...which you will find here
..https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
You need to make 15 posts before you get the ability to pm, change profiles etc..
:icon_hug:
Chrissty
Welcome to Susan's,
....as Katherine says, there are a number of us here who have at least passed the half century...
Do take a look around, and feel free to post on any topics you ar interested in.
I'm sure someone will be along soon to tell you to check out our site rules etc...which you will find here
..https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
You need to make 15 posts before you get the ability to pm, change profiles etc..
:icon_hug:
Chrissty
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: Vicky on December 23, 2008, 11:08:40 PM
Post by: Vicky on December 23, 2008, 11:08:40 PM
Thanks for the welcoming words all.
Beth -- That is some drive you have to do to get to work, unless you go the long way around!! Until I was promoted to supervisor, I had to do a lot of field work in that area and saw some beautiful scenery, but it was a workout on the steering wheel not to mention on the mental stress mechanisms. Now I'm stuck driving a desk in downtown L.A.
Tekla -- The Queen Mary indeed was old school, and regrettably exists no more I am now friends with a couple of the people who worked there as entertainers, and still see some of the group that used to go there for just plain clubbing from time to time. The QM did however have a very distinct place in the history of Southern California's transgender population. It might be fun for me to post about them on a forum board on TG history, they deserve their own place in our history.
Chrissty-- I have indeed read the rules of the road for this group, and they are part of the reason I feel good about posting here. I'm going to try and be a good neighbor, listen before talking, but I don't hold back on saying something is ridiculous when I see that it is. "An old cliche in the post is worth twenty five to the 10th power still in the Online Dictionary of Lousy Humor" is typical of what I mean by an outrageous sense of humor. (GROAN).
Katherine -- Lipstick is supposed to follow the curve of your lips!! If its on straight, that could be why it doesn't look right!! :laugh: Finding a place to get a good makeover and some lessons is well worth the price and its a lot of fun to have someone work on you that way.
Sarah -- I do have several family members who accept me, but do not really understand, but thats OK. I know they want me to be me more happily. Unfortunately, the sister whom I first came out to is one of the "deaths" I am dealing with just now. :( Its my surviving sister who "outed" me to other family members and family friends, and now I will be "coming out" to them my own way, but before I thought I was ready. With the support I now have though, I am seeing more that is possible, than that which is not.
All of you, thanks for a welcome I really feel!! :-*
Beth -- That is some drive you have to do to get to work, unless you go the long way around!! Until I was promoted to supervisor, I had to do a lot of field work in that area and saw some beautiful scenery, but it was a workout on the steering wheel not to mention on the mental stress mechanisms. Now I'm stuck driving a desk in downtown L.A.
Tekla -- The Queen Mary indeed was old school, and regrettably exists no more I am now friends with a couple of the people who worked there as entertainers, and still see some of the group that used to go there for just plain clubbing from time to time. The QM did however have a very distinct place in the history of Southern California's transgender population. It might be fun for me to post about them on a forum board on TG history, they deserve their own place in our history.
Chrissty-- I have indeed read the rules of the road for this group, and they are part of the reason I feel good about posting here. I'm going to try and be a good neighbor, listen before talking, but I don't hold back on saying something is ridiculous when I see that it is. "An old cliche in the post is worth twenty five to the 10th power still in the Online Dictionary of Lousy Humor" is typical of what I mean by an outrageous sense of humor. (GROAN).
Katherine -- Lipstick is supposed to follow the curve of your lips!! If its on straight, that could be why it doesn't look right!! :laugh: Finding a place to get a good makeover and some lessons is well worth the price and its a lot of fun to have someone work on you that way.
Sarah -- I do have several family members who accept me, but do not really understand, but thats OK. I know they want me to be me more happily. Unfortunately, the sister whom I first came out to is one of the "deaths" I am dealing with just now. :( Its my surviving sister who "outed" me to other family members and family friends, and now I will be "coming out" to them my own way, but before I thought I was ready. With the support I now have though, I am seeing more that is possible, than that which is not.
All of you, thanks for a welcome I really feel!! :-*
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: tekla on December 23, 2008, 11:27:02 PM
Post by: tekla on December 23, 2008, 11:27:02 PM
it's about an hour drive to get anywhere from where I live but on the good side I can get anywhere in southern california in an hour
I thought that was just basic LA 101 (the class, not the highway), that it takes at least an hour to go anywhere, no matter where it is you're going. And that's after you take a half an hour to look it up in the Thompson's and find out how to get there.
I thought that was just basic LA 101 (the class, not the highway), that it takes at least an hour to go anywhere, no matter where it is you're going. And that's after you take a half an hour to look it up in the Thompson's and find out how to get there.
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: tinkerbell on December 24, 2008, 09:59:09 PM
Post by: tinkerbell on December 24, 2008, 09:59:09 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi220.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fdd141%2Fgoldendragonfly%2FTinkerbell-2-5.gif&hash=5be8480c960ef48b1799ad2adf2134b3c3a7c712)
Hello Vicky and welcome to Susan's!
Thanks so much for introducing yourself. Please take a few moments to get familiar with all the boards of the site, review the site rules (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)before posting, and take advantage of our many resources such as the wiki (https://www.susans.org/wiki/Main_Page), chat (https://www.susans.org/chat/index.html), and the links listed at the main page. (https://www.susans.org/index.html) We look forward to your future posts and participation. Enjoy your stay! :)
tink :icon_chick:
Title: Re: Hello From Sunny So. Calif. Rain is forecast!
Post by: Janet_Girl on December 25, 2008, 12:33:10 AM
Post by: Janet_Girl on December 25, 2008, 12:33:10 AM
Hi Vicky,
Welcome to our little family. Over 1300 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion. Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another member.
And I am one of the half century ladies here. although I prefer sexy senior.
Janet
Welcome to our little family. Over 1300 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion. Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another member.
And I am one of the half century ladies here. although I prefer sexy senior.
Janet