Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: iminadaze on February 01, 2009, 11:14:36 PM Return to Full Version
Title: One more step for me
Post by: iminadaze on February 01, 2009, 11:14:36 PM
Post by: iminadaze on February 01, 2009, 11:14:36 PM
Since becoming a member at Susan's, I have enjoyed reading about people's
"first time" experiences, like trips to the makeup section, dressing up
for evening walks through town and my favorite, girls night out.
I was always envious of the courage I have read about here.
The least difficult for me was buying the clothes. I always had bought clothes
for my GF and if I ever was asked if I needed assistance I would've
used that excuse and told them she is my size. But I never had to use the excuse.
Buying makeup was difficult cuz I was using the mirrors to match shades to my
skin tone, etc... just really taking an interest in what I was looking for...It was sooo
obvious that the makeup was for me, so I felt uncomfortable with all the GG's around,
but I got through it.
...Baby steps I know, but I am taking them,
and someone here at Susan's who has become dear to me has noticed.
and although she feels that she only did what any kind soul here at Susan's
would do, she did do it. She encouraged me, and her words of
encouragement have gotten me to be my best, and right now my best may not be
good enough in the eyes of others, but it is good enough for me. I think I
really got a taste of what self acceptance feels like thanks to her,
!It felt better than...Um! nevermind.
I took another step forward saturday night and had my first girls night out.
It was with my GF. We went to a local dance club. When I was near the door
I was freaking but after I got inside I was feeling better. I got a
strawberry daiquiri at the bar (first time ever having one, tasted great)
and I walked around the club just looking for peoples strange reactions
and you know what, I didn't see any the whole night...I was just another girl
at the club and it felt great, I really felt alive. By the end of the night
I had all the confidence I needed. I stopped off at a dunkin's for a coffee
where there were people hanging out after the club, and there also nobody looked
at me strangely. I am still glowing from the experience...I never knew I had it in me.
Thank You Sweetheart.
oh! before I forget this is what I looked like when I left my house.
The club lights were a lot less revealing than this flash though
so this camera isn't doing me any justice.
Nicole
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi314.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fll407%2Fiminadaze%2FPicture012a.jpg&hash=3ae912c4eb9bd1c1bd9bf100efeb25e0f0e6a7a4)
"first time" experiences, like trips to the makeup section, dressing up
for evening walks through town and my favorite, girls night out.
I was always envious of the courage I have read about here.
The least difficult for me was buying the clothes. I always had bought clothes
for my GF and if I ever was asked if I needed assistance I would've
used that excuse and told them she is my size. But I never had to use the excuse.
Buying makeup was difficult cuz I was using the mirrors to match shades to my
skin tone, etc... just really taking an interest in what I was looking for...It was sooo
obvious that the makeup was for me, so I felt uncomfortable with all the GG's around,
but I got through it.
...Baby steps I know, but I am taking them,
and someone here at Susan's who has become dear to me has noticed.
and although she feels that she only did what any kind soul here at Susan's
would do, she did do it. She encouraged me, and her words of
encouragement have gotten me to be my best, and right now my best may not be
good enough in the eyes of others, but it is good enough for me. I think I
really got a taste of what self acceptance feels like thanks to her,
!It felt better than...Um! nevermind.
I took another step forward saturday night and had my first girls night out.
It was with my GF. We went to a local dance club. When I was near the door
I was freaking but after I got inside I was feeling better. I got a
strawberry daiquiri at the bar (first time ever having one, tasted great)
and I walked around the club just looking for peoples strange reactions
and you know what, I didn't see any the whole night...I was just another girl
at the club and it felt great, I really felt alive. By the end of the night
I had all the confidence I needed. I stopped off at a dunkin's for a coffee
where there were people hanging out after the club, and there also nobody looked
at me strangely. I am still glowing from the experience...I never knew I had it in me.
Thank You Sweetheart.
oh! before I forget this is what I looked like when I left my house.
The club lights were a lot less revealing than this flash though
so this camera isn't doing me any justice.
Nicole
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi314.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fll407%2Fiminadaze%2FPicture012a.jpg&hash=3ae912c4eb9bd1c1bd9bf100efeb25e0f0e6a7a4)
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 01, 2009, 11:26:10 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 01, 2009, 11:26:10 PM
Looking good there, Girl. The smile does a lot to show your inner femininity. Hope you enjoy more nights out.
Janet
Janet
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: tekla on February 02, 2009, 12:07:36 AM
Post by: tekla on February 02, 2009, 12:07:36 AM
Very nice, and yes club lights are gelled and hued to make people look better, its a big field in design. Flash is designed to make everything look worse in pure white light.
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: katherine on February 02, 2009, 04:05:38 AM
Post by: katherine on February 02, 2009, 04:05:38 AM
Hi Nicole! That must hav been quite an experience! I've gone out dressed, but not to a club. I'm still at that point where my nerves would be so frayed. If I can look half as good as you do in your pic, I'll be happy...
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: Chrissty on February 02, 2009, 04:34:33 AM
Post by: Chrissty on February 02, 2009, 04:34:33 AM
Hi Nicole,
I'm so happy for you...talk about in a the deep end...WoooHoo! :icon_biggrin:
Looks like you're getting "there" ! ;)
:icon_hug:
Chrissty
I'm so happy for you...talk about in a the deep end...WoooHoo! :icon_biggrin:
Looks like you're getting "there" ! ;)
:icon_hug:
Chrissty
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: klodefm42 on February 02, 2009, 04:49:29 AM
Post by: klodefm42 on February 02, 2009, 04:49:29 AM
Go Nicole ;D !
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: iminadaze on February 02, 2009, 08:36:55 PM
Post by: iminadaze on February 02, 2009, 08:36:55 PM
OMG! I am soo blushing and shaking right now. I really don't know how to handle a compliment.
thank you so much everyone
I can't even explain how I feel right now but I will assume all of you have an Idea.
Next time I am going to take the camera with me, but it won't be too soon as I don't
want to get ahead of myself, I was so close to backing out, and I know that ahead lies
confrontation and that scares me.
and I have to ad that if I had all of you in front of me giving me these compliments I would have
covered my face and ran....I still feel like doing that, so I see that I still have plenty to work on.
*Hugs* Nicole
thank you so much everyone
I can't even explain how I feel right now but I will assume all of you have an Idea.
Next time I am going to take the camera with me, but it won't be too soon as I don't
want to get ahead of myself, I was so close to backing out, and I know that ahead lies
confrontation and that scares me.
and I have to ad that if I had all of you in front of me giving me these compliments I would have
covered my face and ran....I still feel like doing that, so I see that I still have plenty to work on.
*Hugs* Nicole
Title: Re: One more step for me
Post by: paulault55 on February 03, 2009, 10:42:04 PM
Post by: paulault55 on February 03, 2009, 10:42:04 PM
Saturday night i went to a gay bar with a friend i met, neither one of us is gay but she's been there before and it is LGBT friendly and it was, we met up with three other TS ladies she knew and we all had a good time. It was the first time going to a bar as Paula and the first time in a gay bar. I even got hit on by a guy and he asked if i was a guy or a girl.
Paula.
Paula.