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Title: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: Anoulie on February 05, 2009, 10:53:09 PM
Post by: Anoulie on February 05, 2009, 10:53:09 PM
Hi y'all!
I registered yesterday (thanks to Emelye again for helping me with my activation problem :-* ) and thought I'd just introduce myself...
My name is Katie (I already talked to some of you on the chat - Katie0328, remember?), I live in Florida and I'm a foreign exchange student (from Germany). I came here in August and I'll go back in June. :)
Now back to topic: My best friend is an MTF transsexual, and is spending an exchange year in Kamakura, Japan right now. We're both registered at a forum for exchange students. I keep sending her PMs and E-Mails, but she never answers... Okay, I saw she had logged in a few times, like three times since August, and once, in November, she wrote a short post as a guest that she was fine... but I'm still worried about her.
You know, she tried to kill herself like three times (she said she wouldn't be alive anymore without me...) because of her body and other stuff... and now, in Japan, she'll have to live as a boy for 10 months, and that must be REALLY hard for her - in Germany, she was more of an anti-social person, sometimes not even daring to go outside because of her body and especially her voice (that's why we communicated mostly via MSN - did I mention she didn't even change her MSN status since four days before her flight?).
And what especially worries me: Everyone (including me, sadly - I didn't know better) kept telling her to go to Japan later, after her HRT, because it wouldn't work right a year later - but this exchange year was just her dream, so her plan was "Okay, I'll go to Japan, come back and kill myself." I don't know when her flight back will be, but I do hope it'll be before mine or that she'll wait for me to come back, at least, before she does anything stupid...
I mean, I look at some people's pictures here, and I think, That person was born in a male body? NO WAY! And these people didn't start HRT when they were 15, mostly, right? I read about another MTF who started when she was like 45?! And it worked out well...
This may be really confusing and way too long, but I just needed to get it off my chest and talk to some people who wouldn't say "What, that guy thinks he's supposed to be a girl?" >:(
Let's just hope she'll come back fine or even answer one of my many PMs/emails in the next time...
- Katie
* Removed excessive personal information
I registered yesterday (thanks to Emelye again for helping me with my activation problem :-* ) and thought I'd just introduce myself...
My name is Katie (I already talked to some of you on the chat - Katie0328, remember?), I live in Florida and I'm a foreign exchange student (from Germany). I came here in August and I'll go back in June. :)
Now back to topic: My best friend is an MTF transsexual, and is spending an exchange year in Kamakura, Japan right now. We're both registered at a forum for exchange students. I keep sending her PMs and E-Mails, but she never answers... Okay, I saw she had logged in a few times, like three times since August, and once, in November, she wrote a short post as a guest that she was fine... but I'm still worried about her.
You know, she tried to kill herself like three times (she said she wouldn't be alive anymore without me...) because of her body and other stuff... and now, in Japan, she'll have to live as a boy for 10 months, and that must be REALLY hard for her - in Germany, she was more of an anti-social person, sometimes not even daring to go outside because of her body and especially her voice (that's why we communicated mostly via MSN - did I mention she didn't even change her MSN status since four days before her flight?).
And what especially worries me: Everyone (including me, sadly - I didn't know better) kept telling her to go to Japan later, after her HRT, because it wouldn't work right a year later - but this exchange year was just her dream, so her plan was "Okay, I'll go to Japan, come back and kill myself." I don't know when her flight back will be, but I do hope it'll be before mine or that she'll wait for me to come back, at least, before she does anything stupid...
I mean, I look at some people's pictures here, and I think, That person was born in a male body? NO WAY! And these people didn't start HRT when they were 15, mostly, right? I read about another MTF who started when she was like 45?! And it worked out well...
This may be really confusing and way too long, but I just needed to get it off my chest and talk to some people who wouldn't say "What, that guy thinks he's supposed to be a girl?" >:(
Let's just hope she'll come back fine or even answer one of my many PMs/emails in the next time...
- Katie
* Removed excessive personal information
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: TamTam on February 05, 2009, 11:00:31 PM
Post by: TamTam on February 05, 2009, 11:00:31 PM
Hi, Katie. :) I'm 19 and my girlfriend is mtf. I can't imagine how hard this is for you [and her] to deal with. :-\ But yes, be assured that most of the transpeople on this site didn't start hormones until well into adulthood.. your friend will not be left to go down some horrible path if she has to wait a few more years.
I wish I knew something to tell her to make her feel better or at least not suicidal anymore, but I don't.. :-\ Just know we're here for you and we understand, at least in some small way, what you're going through. :) Feel free to take a look around the SO forum, there's a wide variety of experience. :)
I wish I knew something to tell her to make her feel better or at least not suicidal anymore, but I don't.. :-\ Just know we're here for you and we understand, at least in some small way, what you're going through. :) Feel free to take a look around the SO forum, there's a wide variety of experience. :)
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: Wendy C on February 06, 2009, 06:09:46 PM
Post by: Wendy C on February 06, 2009, 06:09:46 PM
Hi Katie, I'm glad she has a friend that cares for her and welcome to Susans. All you can really do is wait until she contacts you again and then tell her that we are here for her. She is very lucky to be that young and to be thinking about transition and age does not really matter as to a timeline. Hugs
Wendy
Wendy
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: Anoulie on March 26, 2009, 07:33:56 PM
Post by: Anoulie on March 26, 2009, 07:33:56 PM
So here I am again...
I thought I'd just let you know that I received a letter last week - from Japan. I almost had a heart attack!
She's fine and misses me... I almost started crying.
Since January she hasn't had any internet access whatsoever because of some virus (I don't know why she didn't contact me before, but I don't really care). She didn't say anything like "I hate pretending I'm a boy" etc. on those two pages (except she likes that her new haircut makes her face look more feminine and her parents complained about that and she wishes she had long blond hair like that other exchange student at her school), so I didn't mention anything about that in my letter because I knew (or thought I knew) she wouldn't like that. So sorry, she still doesn't know about this forum (wouldn't help a lot anyways, since she doesn't have internet), but I promise I'll show it to her when she comes back. Ok?
I thought I'd just let you know that I received a letter last week - from Japan. I almost had a heart attack!
She's fine and misses me... I almost started crying.
Since January she hasn't had any internet access whatsoever because of some virus (I don't know why she didn't contact me before, but I don't really care). She didn't say anything like "I hate pretending I'm a boy" etc. on those two pages (except she likes that her new haircut makes her face look more feminine and her parents complained about that and she wishes she had long blond hair like that other exchange student at her school), so I didn't mention anything about that in my letter because I knew (or thought I knew) she wouldn't like that. So sorry, she still doesn't know about this forum (wouldn't help a lot anyways, since she doesn't have internet), but I promise I'll show it to her when she comes back. Ok?
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: Janet_Girl on March 27, 2009, 02:06:16 AM
Post by: Janet_Girl on March 27, 2009, 02:06:16 AM
Hi Katie, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 1900 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion. Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another SO. :icon_hug:
Janet
Welcome to our little family. Over 1900 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion. Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another SO. :icon_hug:
Janet
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: Wendy C on March 27, 2009, 01:45:57 PM
Post by: Wendy C on March 27, 2009, 01:45:57 PM
Thanks for the update Katie, Keep her and in your heart and when the opportunity arrives you will be ready to help her. Let her be the one to decide when the time is right by what she tells you about her thoughts and in that way she will be ready to accept suggestions much easier. Hugs
Wendy
Wendy
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: miniangel on March 31, 2009, 06:40:18 AM
Post by: miniangel on March 31, 2009, 06:40:18 AM
Hi Katie.
I came over here after reading your response to one of my posts. I'm so glad to hear your friend made contact again. I console myself by thinking that as long as there is one person in the world that we can talk to, it isn't so black as it can sometimes seem. My own dear friend battles his way through life, stubborn and proud, and I have to remind him that I will always be here for him, whatever happens.
Even if your friend can't access this forum, maybe she'd be comforted to know it exists, that she's not alone in the world.
Minnie.
I came over here after reading your response to one of my posts. I'm so glad to hear your friend made contact again. I console myself by thinking that as long as there is one person in the world that we can talk to, it isn't so black as it can sometimes seem. My own dear friend battles his way through life, stubborn and proud, and I have to remind him that I will always be here for him, whatever happens.
Even if your friend can't access this forum, maybe she'd be comforted to know it exists, that she's not alone in the world.
Minnie.
Title: Re: A significant other says hi! :)
Post by: TamTam on March 31, 2009, 11:31:38 AM
Post by: TamTam on March 31, 2009, 11:31:38 AM
I'm so happy she got in contact with you! :D :) I hope she's doing okay.