General Discussions => General discussions => ARGHHH! => Topic started by: perfectisolation on April 03, 2009, 11:02:50 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: perfectisolation on April 03, 2009, 11:02:50 PM
Post by: perfectisolation on April 03, 2009, 11:02:50 PM
I'm so sick of people on irc (chatrooms), who know I'm trans, saying things like "a real man does this" or "a real man with a vag would use it" or "a real man is good at math" or how it's girly to look at cute pictures of animals, or saying things about how "real men" have penises. F them. It's hard enough dealing with dysphoria every time my someone says something that reminds me that I'm just a vag to them. It's hard enough dealing with how I should express my identity in public, and stressing out about simple things like getting a haircut. It's hard enough feeling so limited and left out in every part of my life because of how I am. I'm so PO'ed. I'm so annoyed. stfu you a-holes.
:icon_boxing: :icon_chainsaw: :eusa_wall: :icon_censored: :icon_evil: :icon_userfriendly:
vvv Yeah Meghan, I forgot to say, this is on an irc server where trolls, and just plain mean, ignorant people are abundant.
:icon_boxing: :icon_chainsaw: :eusa_wall: :icon_censored: :icon_evil: :icon_userfriendly:
vvv Yeah Meghan, I forgot to say, this is on an irc server where trolls, and just plain mean, ignorant people are abundant.
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: MeghanAndrews on April 03, 2009, 11:05:12 PM
Post by: MeghanAndrews on April 03, 2009, 11:05:12 PM
I'm glad this wasn't in a Susan's chat Northy, you know you are always welcome in our home :)
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: sd on April 04, 2009, 02:10:42 AM
Post by: sd on April 04, 2009, 02:10:42 AM
Northy, it is very common for males to cut each other down to feel good.
FIGHT BACK!
They expect it. :D
And don't let anyone tell you that you're not a man.
FIGHT BACK!
They expect it. :D
And don't let anyone tell you that you're not a man.
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: Miniar on April 04, 2009, 11:37:45 AM
Post by: Miniar on April 04, 2009, 11:37:45 AM
Comment back.
"At least I'm secure enough in my masculinity not to have to take cheap shots at people."
"No need to get your panties in a twist little miss insecure."
"Just because you're that small doesn't mean you have to take shots at someone who hasn't got one yet."
"I'm sorry, am I making you question your sexuality? Cause you know, that's not intentional. It's alright if you're curious."
Things like that.
"At least I'm secure enough in my masculinity not to have to take cheap shots at people."
"No need to get your panties in a twist little miss insecure."
"Just because you're that small doesn't mean you have to take shots at someone who hasn't got one yet."
"I'm sorry, am I making you question your sexuality? Cause you know, that's not intentional. It's alright if you're curious."
Things like that.
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: myles on April 04, 2009, 12:29:36 PM
Post by: myles on April 04, 2009, 12:29:36 PM
I was amazed how quickly everyone started telling me what "real men" do and don't do. I also find it very annoying!
Miniar thanks for the suggestions.
Myles
Miniar thanks for the suggestions.
Myles
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: Miniar on April 04, 2009, 01:03:31 PM
Post by: Miniar on April 04, 2009, 01:03:31 PM
My favorite retort is "Real men don't need to validate their masculinity by making "Real men.. " comments."
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: heatherrose on April 04, 2009, 02:13:26 PM
Post by: heatherrose on April 04, 2009, 02:13:26 PM
A good friend, once told me,
"Never take advise from someone less sucessful than yourself."
One old bat that envisioned herself to be my "mentor",
used to say things like, "Real women or ladies don't this or that."
My retort was and continues to be,
"I know of one that does................
ME"
While grocery shopping, one day, "she" showed me
how "she" thought a "lady" should walk and I had all I
could do to contain my laughter and embarrassment
because the display was more akin to a 6'3" man
in unisex clothing rushing to the restroom.
OMFG
People have no idea how foolish they look
as they try to force their vision
of what's proper on others.
Proper is subjective.
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: perfectisolation on April 09, 2009, 08:28:07 AM
Post by: perfectisolation on April 09, 2009, 08:28:07 AM
I actually do fight back, but still the words hurt because I know they're saying those things to attack my weaknesses, and I know they're saying it because I'm trans (I told them because I introduced myself in those channels as a female, before I came out to myself). Also it's not just male irc trolls, it's women too. I've had this totally passive aggressive girl pull this kind of crap with me, attacking my male and trans identity any chance she could get because she thought I was a threat to her womanhood.
God the internet, especially irc, is full of narcissistic losers. Except you all, you're a great bunch. :)
God the internet, especially irc, is full of narcissistic losers. Except you all, you're a great bunch. :)
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: tekla on April 09, 2009, 09:03:06 AM
Post by: tekla on April 09, 2009, 09:03:06 AM
God the internet, especially irc, is full of narcissistic losers.
Back when I was teaching students would say things to the effect that basically "College sucks." To which I'd reply, "That's why its such excellent preparation for real life, which you'll find out, also sucks."
Sure the net is full of narcissistic losers, so is real life. Perhaps even more so, they just say less.
Real people, men and women both, tend not to care. If you know your path, comments from others will not sway you.
Back when I was teaching students would say things to the effect that basically "College sucks." To which I'd reply, "That's why its such excellent preparation for real life, which you'll find out, also sucks."
Sure the net is full of narcissistic losers, so is real life. Perhaps even more so, they just say less.
Real people, men and women both, tend not to care. If you know your path, comments from others will not sway you.
Title: Re: Stop attacking my male identity & masculinity!
Post by: Lokaeign on April 10, 2009, 09:55:57 AM
Post by: Lokaeign on April 10, 2009, 09:55:57 AM
Quote from: northy on April 09, 2009, 08:28:07 AM
I actually do fight back, but still the words hurt because I know they're saying those things to attack my weaknesses, and I know they're saying it because I'm trans (I told them because I introduced myself in those channels as a female, before I came out to myself).
Man, I'm really sorry you're having to deal with these bullies. What garbage people do spout. (And to think, it's TS and TG men and women who get accused of perpetuating gender stereotypes.)
QuoteGod the internet, especially irc, is full of narcissistic losers. Except you all, you're a great bunch. :)
Yeah, you said a mouthful. I mean the percentage of narcissistic losers is probably no greater than in the meatspace population, but at least in real life most of these people are reined in just a little by having to deal with the consequenses of talking smack to someone's face. Hiding behind a keyboard and a VDU makes bullying so much easier.