Susan's Place Transgender Resources

If there was one thing you wanted people to view transsexuals as rather than what the modern society thinks of them now. On the stigma of transsexualism.

What would it be?

I would change this erroneous notion that they...or I guess we...are going against what God- or whatever supreme being- made them at birth. It never occurs to these people that God might have put the desire to transition in there as well.

I'd have them know that Transsexual has nothing to do with sex - it's unrelated to homosexuality, and it's not a fetish.

So many people can't seem to distinguish between Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation.

Quote from: Teknoir on June 14, 2009, 10:50:04 PM
I'd have them know that Transsexual has nothing to do with sex - it's unrelated to homosexuality, and it's not a fetish.

So many people can't seem to distinguish between Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation.

Seconded.  I wince every time I see the T appended to LGB because even though we're all fighting for rights and acceptance, coupling ->-bleeped-<- with LGB just compounds the perception that it's a sexual orientation issue rather than a gender dysphoria.

I know some people see it as a natural alliance but I don't think one has to break that alliance to draw a distinction between LGB vs. T and *stop* correlating the two.  If the transgender community keeps making this conscious correlation, how can we expect the uninformed cisgendered common populace to know better?

Quote from: Teknoir on June 14, 2009, 10:50:04 PM
I'd have them know that Transsexual has nothing to do with sex - it's unrelated to homosexuality, and it's not a fetish.

So many people can't seem to distinguish between Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation.

What he said and Finewine gave a good explanation also  :icon_chick:

the obsession with genitals.

I'd like people to stop believing that being born in the wrong body is a choice, or thinking about Jerry Springer every time they hear the word 'transsexual'.

I'd like it if I could read an article online about a person who's going through transistion, and not see an overwhelming amount of comments yelling about what freaks we are.

Just to accept us as we are.  We are not the spawn of satan, perverts, making a choice to be this way.  If you can accept a person for being just who they are, would that not be better than hating them.

Janet

Quote from: Dominick on June 15, 2009, 12:36:32 AM
I'd like people to stop believing that being born in the wrong body is a choice, or thinking about Jerry Springer every time they hear the word 'transsexual'.

I'd like it if I could read an article online about a person who's going through transistion, and not see an overwhelming amount of comments yelling about what freaks we are.

i agree with this one most. its what my folks use to think of TS

Priscilla Queen of the Desert is NOT about transsexuals!

Quote from: GinaDouglas on June 15, 2009, 08:53:00 PM
Priscilla Queen of the Desert is NOT about transsexuals!

That's OK, Virginia, Goddess of the garden is all about human rights for all

I would erase all knowledge of preconceived social "gender-roles" making it easier for the Trans community to explain that "I want to be a woman, I don't just want to do a woman's job", which would make it less likely for people to associate Trans with sexuality.

Cause for me, sometimes the reaction I've found is that people see me as a butch woman, not a man, and they assume that I just want to be treated as a man in the sense of social roles.
I don't care about social roles. I don't want a man's job. I don't really care if I'm sir'd as long as I'm not she'd.
What I want, Is for my body to match my brain. Ain't got nothing to do with anyone else.

Thank you for reminding me to finish my sentence

Quote from: Teknoir on June 14, 2009, 10:50:04 PM
I'd have them know that Transsexual has nothing to do with sex - it's unrelated to homosexuality, and it's not a fetish.

So many people can't seem to distinguish between Gender Identity and Sexual Orientation.

I also think alienation is created by the term 'Transsexual'. I personally will never promote the fact of my orientation and prefer to keep quiet about it. I can never understand the celebration of 'transition' or 'look at me', 'I used to be a man' and whole website's dedicated to someone's transition with all the gory details. Sometimes we create our own problems and media nightmares.  For me it's a personal thing and transition is not something I want to broadcast. Each to their own.

I'd change the public's implicit perception that a Transsexual is a man becoming a woman. People don't understand the mindset of the Transsexual and that she mentally, for all practical purposes, is a woman. As we have seen in the cases of those disabled, from somethign as simple as an amputee to something as extreme as the situation presented in "The Butterfly in the Diving Bell", the mind, not the body, is the essence of identity and by extension much of our definition of humanity (though the two do affect each other).

I worked at a very large quasi federal government organization (you'd know the name) and a memo came out about a guy that was transitioning and would be coming back to work as a female. My coworkers (some of whom I had known for a long time) were simply aghast at the concept, and some not very nice things were said about the situation.

I had to stand there and just absorb it; if I said anything then I fear would have started getting unwelcome personal questions.

So i'd say that i'd like to see the public get more educated on what it means to be transgendered/transsexual, and why a person might choose to go thru transition. And also have the public learn that a trans person is not a sexual deviant, he/she is just a neighbor with a medical condition.

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Post Merge: June 18, 2009, 01:17:39 PM

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Quote from: chrysalis on June 18, 2009, 01:17:12 AM
I'd change the public's implicit perception that a Transsexual is a man becoming a woman. People don't understand the mindset of the Transsexual and that she mentally, for all practical purposes, is a woman.

Well said. I might add that the reverse is also true for our brother FTMs.

I had to stand there and just absorb it; if I said anything then I fear would have started getting unwelcome personal questions.

So i'd say that i'd like to see the public get more educated on what it means to be transgendered/transsexual, and why a person might choose to go thru transition.

If not you, then who?  If not at that critical moment, then when?  Oh, far be it from you to make your own life uncomfortable, but, given that, who is going to be for you when that happens?  If not you, who?  If not now, when?

Nice, fine and dandy to wish, but real people make real change happen.  You were given a chance to really make a difference, but, instead of working on that change then and there, you come in here an whine to us, and WISH, it would be different someday.   

How very strange.

Quote from: tekla on June 18, 2009, 10:42:04 PM
I had to stand there and just absorb it; if I said anything then I fear would have started getting unwelcome personal questions.

So i'd say that i'd like to see the public get more educated on what it means to be transgendered/transsexual, and why a person might choose to go thru transition.

If not you, then who?  If not at that critical moment, then when?  Oh, far be it from you to make your own life uncomfortable, but, given that, who is going to be for you when that happens?  If not you, who?  If not now, when?

Nice, fine and dandy to wish, but real people make real change happen.  You were given a chance to really make a difference, but, instead of working on that change then and there, you come in here an whine to us, and WISH, it would be different someday.   

How very strange.

The topic of the thread is "if you could change one thing". I gave my answer to that specific question while relating an experience that I had to show WHY I would change that one thing. Of course wanting to change something (the thread topic), and actually changing something (activism), are two different things, but that's not the topic of the thread now is it?

What you said is true tekla, but that experience happened to me before I figured out that I had GID, before I joined this site, and before I had really put much thought into the matter. I would not have been a good spokesman for trans issues at that time. Today I would probably have a different and better answer.

Now let's quit hijacking the thread.

I'm pretty new to the site and all, but I saw this and I'd like to add my 2 cents.

If I could change one thing about the stigma that is usually attached to transsexualism, it would be, to remove the thought(s) that being who you are on the inside and bringing that out, is somehow "wrong" by "typical societal standards".

the quotes are merely to compensate for the gross generalization, my apologies that I cannot articulate it better, but I believe it may communicate the intended message.

I'd simply want people to accept us for who we are and stop trying to deny who we are, because it's not their place to decide, and it's not their place to judge us.

I would change ppl telling me how I "WANT" to be a man, I already am just someone screwed up when it came to body development.

Actually I'd change people from writing about 'what upsets them' and get them writing about what they intend to do change it.  But I guess people like being powerless in the end, more to complain about.

Quote from: Janet Lynn on June 15, 2009, 12:48:04 AM
Just to accept us as we are.  We are not the spawn of satan, perverts, making a choice to be this way.  If you can accept a person for being just who they are, would that not be better than hating them.

Janet

Janet Lynn is right on.  Transsexuality is a birth defect ... nothing more ... nothing less.  My one cousin was born without his right hand.  There is just a stub after his elbow with two, very tiny, residual fingers there.  Nobody (except true idiots) hates or rejects him because of his birth defect.  They should not hate or reject us because of ours.  Hugs!    :)

I would change the concept that being "transgender" is not an identity. I would just as soon be out to everybody that "needs to know" just as the Gays and Lesbians in my community can out themselves in many places and in casual conversation without raising eyebrows. As far as I am concerned, I worked on looking like a passable female for self-protection, fun, looking good in clothes, and autogynophelia >:-)  I say we should have the right to be honest about our pasts without consequences. I did have surgery for arthritis last year and disclosed to all the medical staff who took a history and the reaction was mainly "so what, as long as you can take a catheder"

Just to be considered another person in society without gender becoming an issue.

I would change the fact that people always assume transsexuals look like their birth sex. Countless times I've heard friends tell me that this transguy I know who's been on T much longer than I have "looks just like a regular guy". Yeah, that's kinda the point of transition.

Quote from: chrysalis on June 18, 2009, 01:17:12 AM
I'd change the public's implicit perception that a Transsexual is a man becoming a woman. People don't understand the mindset of the Transsexual and that she mentally, for all practical purposes, is a woman.

I would change this, too, but for a completely different reason.  I would change the perception that transpeople are only transwomen.  Transmen seem to be more ignored by the media (for better or worse), the general populous, and sometimes even the trans community.

It seems that unless I'm in the FtM area or unless a guy is posting, I constantly see references to only transwomen and I often feel the urge to post something inflammatory.  I did once and got some flack for it.  I just read that entire ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- post [6 pages.. whew], and even after a few guys posted, everyone still continued to define a ->-bleeped-<- as someone after a transwoman, when it's really someone after a transperson.

Also, when I come out to people, the common perception has been when I tell them I'm having surgery is that I'm getting a fully functional penis sewn on somehow.  This assumption comes from the fact that "surgery" for MtFs is a vaginoplasty, I suppose.  They just generally know more about how things work for MtFs.

That said, I don't envy the objectification many of the women on here face, but we all face it, albeit the men not as often.  Trust me, I enjoy not being objectified the way I used to be when I presented as female.

Hope I didn't step on too many toes.

Quote from: Kayden on July 06, 2009, 10:29:49 PM
I would change this, too, but for a completely different reason.  I would change the perception that transpeople are only transwomen.  Transmen seem to be more ignored by the media (for better or worse), the general populous, and sometimes even the trans community.

Ok I will confess that before I joined this site, if someone asked me to picture a transsexual in my mind it would have been a transwoman.  In fact, I had no appreciation at all for just how man transmen there are and while I've heard guys talk about transwomen (always with the non-specific "transsexual" term), I've never heard them mention transmen.

So why is this? Probably a number of factors.  One is the male fascination with transwomen (whether that be from the ->-bleeped-<-s or from the transphobics - the vast majority of bio men probably reside in one or other of those groups).  Frankly, and I apologize for this, but most bio men probably visualize transmen as an extreme form of butch lesbianism - and a rare one too.  Women on the other hand seem less freaked out and phobic about transmen (well, generally anyway).  I think the asymmetric reaction between men and women on people transitioning away from their gender is fundamental to this asymmetry in public perception.

Also, as Kayden said, the media and the adult industry overwhelmingly focus on transwomen; there are some exceptions but I believe that's very much a minority...possibly for similar reasons as the above.

QuoteI just read that entire ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- post [6 pages.. whew], and even after a few guys posted, everyone still continued to define a ->-bleeped-<- as someone after a transwoman, when it's really someone after a transperson.

There's a well known so-called "TS dating" site and I defy you to find a single female ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<- or transman there. :)   It's full of male "f**k-my-arse" ->-bleeped-<- ->-bleeped-<-s and transwomen (the latter being mostly hookers advertising their "samurai power").

All rather depressing, isn't it?  :(