Site News and Information => Introductions => Topic started by: Gemma S on July 24, 2009, 05:33:32 PM Return to Full Version

Title: wanting to be female
Post by: Gemma S on July 24, 2009, 05:33:32 PM
hi my name is gary and i,ve been wanting to be a woman for the best part of 25-30 years but i,ve never told anyone till now. I am 40 years old and i,ve only just told the doctor and he was understanding about it but my mind is all over the place can anyone help. Just need a friend who feels the same (and this is not a joke) i live in leeds England. thx :(
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: Nero on July 24, 2009, 05:48:29 PM
Welcome Gemma. I'm Nero.
<offers hand>
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: Janet_Girl on July 24, 2009, 06:05:55 PM
Hi Gemma, :icon_wave:

Welcome to our little family. Over 2700 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.

Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams.  Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.

But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another sister. :icon_hug:

And be sure to check out

  • Site Terms of Service and rules to live by  (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
  • Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
  • Post Ranks  (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)

Start by finding a good gender therapist.  And doors will open.

Janet
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: Gemma S on July 24, 2009, 06:09:12 PM
hi nero thx for replying. I keep saying to myself do i or dont i this is the mess im in i want to be female but faceing other people that will be very hard and not in the care pathway yet. just waiting for the psychiatrist.

Post Merge: July 24, 2009, 06:33:32 PM

well as you can see i have already thorght of a name for myself (Gemma) a lot better than Gary and yes i would like a full sex change and not a crossdresser. thx janet i will be on this site for a long long time to talk to people and tell people how i get on with the biggest thing i have ever done in my life. How i feel at the mo is confusion , scared , feeling down :'(
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: V M on July 24, 2009, 06:49:04 PM
Hi Gemma,

Welcome to Susan's

I wrestled with my femininity for years. Cross dressing in my teens, etc. I had allot of fear also and still do to some degree. Now in my late forties I'm accepting who I am and am noticing that others are becoming more and more accepting of me. Self acceptance is the key  ;)
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: Lori on July 24, 2009, 06:49:57 PM
Hi, nothing like opening pandora's box. Always starts with telling one person. Then another...then another....
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: Genevieve Swann on July 24, 2009, 09:55:57 PM
Gemma, You might try living as a female 24/7 for a time. That is usually recommended before surgury anyway. As far as coming out to others that is a sure way to break the ice. Let them see you enfemme. Then say Oh, I thought you knew. Sounds too simple doesn't it. We all have to start some way.
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: gennee on July 26, 2009, 07:05:10 PM
Hi Gemma and welcome.

Gennee
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: eshaver on July 27, 2009, 09:28:41 AM
Gemma , you can e-mail me direct as I belong to a european based trans forum . meanwhile What can I do here in America to help you transisition ? I'm nearly 60 and I have been out since 1994. Ellen Shaver 
Title: Re: wanting to be female
Post by: K8 on July 27, 2009, 02:13:20 PM
Hi Gemma.  Confusion, scared, feeling down go with the territory. :P

Talking to your doctor was a big step.  Talking to someone else - a friend, a therapist, a support group - is perhaps the next step. 

I'm sorry, but I respectfully disagree with Genevieve Swann.  Going from where you are now to full time woman is a HUGE step.  Better to nibble away at it.  Do a little at a time, to give yourself time to adjust as you go.  If I had to go 24/7 straight from the closet I would never have made it.  Now I'm 24/7 and loving it, but I did a lot of work to get here.  Don't jump in the deep end until you learn to swim.

Take your time puzzling it all out.  There's no rush.

*hugs*
Kate