Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I was thinking I should let my hair grow out because it doesnt matter. But last night I had a dream that my hair grew down to my shoulders in one night and I was freaking out and trying to find a barber. I wonder why. Maybe I can to it when im on t but for now it just reminds me that Im still female so Ill look like a girl. :/

When I was 16 I let my hair grow, because I liked metal music and I wanted to be like my favourite singers.
Well, I discovered after some time that I didn't look like my favourite singers, but I looked like a girl.  :'(
Now I'd like to let my hair grow a bit, but I have your same problem.
I think I'll wait t too. :)

I had a dream about my hair growing out again and being freaked out about it.  I used to have long hair and didn't care, because long hair doesn't dictate gender.  But truly, when you have long hair and look like a girl, that's a little different.  I understand completely, and you should do whatever makes you comfortable, no matter what others (including barbers) say.

Quote from: Hector on August 30, 2009, 03:19:25 PM
I liked metal music and I wanted to be like my favourite singers.
Well, I discovered after some time that I didn't look like my favourite singers, but I looked like a girl.  :'(
Now I'd like to let my hair grow a bit, but I have your same problem.
I think I'll wait t too. :)

This. I was like that I remember keeping my hair long for that reason, but now I will only  grow it long once i'm on T, might grow it a little longer though.

I had hair down to my hips until I was 16.  To this day, when I'm feeling really worthless, I get "phantom hair".  I swear I can feel it pulling on my head when I'm really down about myself.  :(

Fortunately, since starting transition, those moments have been very rare.  :)

Thats spooky!

I used to have long hair until I was 17 and then decided to cut it all off. Short hair helps you pass much better. I want to grow my hair back longer into an emo-ish style, but I feared I may look to girly.. however I have tried my friends hair extensions on for a laugh and I looked like a guy..

So I want to grow it back its just getting past that naff stage which is the problem!

Jay

ehh hairs :D
today I was at ear nose throat doctor, my grandmother needed ear cleaning! (and someone to help her.. me!)

the doctor always referred me as to a girl until grandma (grr) said "that's my grandson"..

First thing she said was "what's up with the hair!"

how I hate it, sometimes I pass and then I am with family (who KNOWS!) and then people give me comments like "you are not a child anymore" and hair jokes.. just because they think I am something I am not.
\
And probably even more if they did see me as myself and then someone lied to them like my grandma! and then they seem to be even more critical of my look

Quote from: Myself on September 01, 2009, 08:02:53 AM
ehh hairs :D
today I was at ear nose throat doctor, my grandmother needed ear cleaning! (and someone to help her.. me!)

the doctor always referred me as to a girl until grandma (grr) said "that's my grandson"..

First thing she said was "what's up with the hair!"

how I hate it, sometimes I pass and then I am with family (who KNOWS!) and then people give me comments like "you are not a child anymore" and hair jokes.. just because they think I am something I am not.
\
And probably even more if they did see me as myself and then someone lied to them like my grandma! and then they seem to be even more critical of my look

I assume your grandmother knows right? Sounds like she's being a normal stubborn grandmother. Personally, if that's you in your avatar, I would just think she was starting to go senile.

Quote from: Radar on September 01, 2009, 12:09:35 PM
I assume your grandmother knows right? Sounds like she's being a normal stubborn grandmother. Personally, if that's you in your avatar, I would just think she was starting to go senile.

She does know, but I am getting more "he" than "she" even though it is me in my avatar picture it seems..
On the phone I only get she ^^

Quote from: Myself on September 01, 2009, 12:46:21 PM
She does know, but I am getting more "he" than "she" even though it is me in my avatar picture it seems..
On the phone I only get she ^^

If it counts for anything, I would never in my life call you a "he".  And I agree with Radar, if I were the doctor I'd think she was a little senile.

I'd rather my hair long, but like everyone has already said--it doesn't help passing.  Even on T, I've found that longer hair makes people do double-takes.  For that matter, I've mistaken some bio-guys with long hair for females (until they started talking).  It seems that if a guy with long hair lacks obvious characteristics that are typically gendered as 'male' (stubble/facial hair, angular face/build, height, large shoulders and comparatively small hips), it pushes them into a sort of androgynous zone where it's hard to tell what they are at a quick glance.

Quote from: Myself on September 01, 2009, 08:02:53 AM
the doctor always referred me as to a girl until grandma (grr) said "that's my grandson".

My grandmother does the same thing, and she knows about me.  I went to visit her when she was staying at an assisted living home, and all the nurses (and patients) kept asking her "and is this your grandson?", which she pretended not to hear and instead proclaimed "meet my granddaughter."  I was the one who got strange looks (from the nurses, at least--they're well-acquainted with my grandmother and know that she is far from senile).

Quote from: Jamie-o on September 01, 2009, 06:27:10 AM
I had hair down to my hips until I was 16.  To this day, when I'm feeling really worthless, I get "phantom hair".  I swear I can feel it pulling on my head when I'm really down about myself.  :(

I have the phantom hair thing even when I'm not feeling self-conscious. I had long hair until about 13, when the dysphoria started getting really severe again... since then it's been short and long, though from the time I decided to transition it's been no longer than 4 inches. Every once in awhile I'll decide I want long hair again and grow it out for a time... but it never gets past about 2 inches before it starts annoying me. Rather than being worried it'll keep me from passing, since I can always grow a beard to compensate, I'm of the opinion that any longer than 15 minutes to get ready in the morning just isn't worth it. If I can't put a little gel in my hair, run a comb through it, and be done, I don't see the point.

SD

I used to have long Richard Stallman type hair (only much thicker) when I was a teenager. I can relate to what you're all saying regarding idols. Nice to know I'm not the only one :).

I chopped it all off for passability. Thinking I'll grow the ol' pony tail back post-T. Undecided... depends on how quickly the T works, and the results I end up with.

Oh, I eventually learnt to take care of the hair later on and ended up with some human looking hair instead of Stallman overgrowth  :laugh:

You know, it was baffling to me to read that nightmare. You're a guy... go to town with some scissors or a trimmer, right?  :laugh:

But seriously, I've had balding dreams before. The amusement of how perfectly MTF/FTM mirror never ends.

Quote from: Autumn on September 02, 2009, 06:00:41 AM
You know, it was baffling to me to read that nightmare. You're a guy... go to town with some scissors or a trimmer, right?  :laugh:

But seriously, I've had balding dreams before. The amusement of how perfectly MTF/FTM mirror never ends.

Haha Ive have fears of going bald to when I start t. Fortunetely hair restoration techniques are getting better

Quote from: Kyle :P on September 02, 2009, 02:52:55 PM
Haha Ive have fears of going bald to when I start t. Fortunetely hair restoration techniques are getting better

Yes, I've also had worries about going bald.  I've even had nightmares about it.  I just really, really don't want to lose my hair.  I'm all in for hairline changes.  It's just that I value my hair.  There aren't many men in my family without their hair.  The people I am supposedly most related to have thick heads of hair so here's hoping.

I, also, am terrified of going bald. Prior to starting T, I had the traditional female hairline, and my hair was mad thick. Over the past year on T, it's thinned considerably, and my hairline has receded... which made me think I was balding. Instead, however, once I got over the initial panic, I realized it was just reshaping itself. My hairline actually advanced down my forehead in the middle, while it receded on the sides, toward the temples... kind of hard to explain without a picture. It advanced ON my temples, above my sideburns. And the thinning, which I thought was a signal I was balding, is the exact same thinning I can see on my little brother, who's 19. I think it's just a difference between hair thickness in males and females in my family, and while it may signal that baldness is a possibility down the line, it's not here yet... and in that case, I agree with Kyle: thank god the hair restoration techniques are improving by the year.

SD

I have a very real fear of this....and I have no idea of how it will turn out. The only man I know of in my family was my great-grandfather and he was bald. My grandfather I never met, died before I was born and wasn't related to my great-grandfather (and ive never seen him) ....so god knows if I'll retain all my hair.