Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Non-Op => Topic started by: rogue on October 17, 2009, 03:03:35 PM Return to Full Version

Title: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: rogue on October 17, 2009, 03:03:35 PM
Living as a female full time for 9 years, and now begrudgingly back as a male has left me between two worlds, I dont identify with men...and certainly the minutae of the male world (you must have a  thorough knowledge of football/engines/boxing/usless facts)...and dont get me started on having to use mens toilets.....I digress....I feel my time as Sarah has given me an insight to relationships, I was with a male friend and watched all the little signs a woman he was talking to was giving, I could see clearly shes was into him, and as the conversation ended, I was aching to tell him waht I knew..but it would have been too much information..there have been many other instances where my female experience will alert me to how people are feeling...oh and how women feel about me...lol thats an eye opener...anyway, it would be great to hear your feelings/experiences.
Thanks
Rogue x
Title: Re: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: Nigella on October 17, 2009, 03:11:58 PM
I would really like to know why on earth did you detransition after nine years living as a woman? I know its off topic but I can not for the life of me go back to living like that, it was such a dichotomy of feelings.

Stardust
Title: Re: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: rogue on October 17, 2009, 03:24:11 PM
The answer is very very long and wordy, in a nutshell I was in a abusive/toxic realtionship, I was acutley isolated, I had lost contact with my psychiatrist, I had incredible money problems, I was suffering from serious depression and a paranoid illness (from such long periods of isolation and stress), a person who alledgeley was my friend made it their business to out me in pubs across town, I lost everyone who mattered to me, and those who stayed turend against me, I was a complete bitch to be around, and after an incident that left me in collapse I decided that I simply wanted to take time out from the pressure to reallign myself, re organise and start agian when I was healthy and strong....that was in 2004.... (theres more to that story...) but its good to be here to share, and maybe help other people on the path.
Title: Re: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: Nigella on October 17, 2009, 04:01:19 PM
I'm sorry to hear that, yeah, you need time to discover who you are without any body else. To be you and not be pushed and pulled by other people. We can only be truly ourselves by discovering what we are not.


Take care

Stardust
Title: Re: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: Lachlann on October 17, 2009, 04:02:42 PM
... so tell me of these infamous 'signs' girls give.
Title: Re: Has the gender reassignment process given you a new insight to living as a male?
Post by: rogue on October 18, 2009, 03:05:42 PM
.....I find that having been in transiton for so long I do tend to slip into female mode ..I think its a way of socalising...when I was with my friend the woman was responding to me on a female same level, which let me sit back and watch as she showed she was very much into him...(which is fair coz hes a lovley guy, very gentle, strong, and caring)...As they chatted, she mirroed his body language, looked into his eyes, played with her hair, slipped in question about his family, her intonation rose amd she prolonged the conversation when my freind he needed to leave, ...I was in my little zone..smiling for him...afterwards I couldnt resist telling him as we drove, lol he no idea so it made his day  :    )