Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Well, the apartment is secured, the furniture shopping is underway and come mid-November, I shall be flying off and returning with Shayna.

It's an exciting, yet slightly terrifying, time.  I really want this to work out - so much so that I can both feel it and taste it.  It's like I have a worn old teaspoon in my mouth and the butterflies in my chest are giving their wings a rest and trampolining on the knot in my stomach instead.

Having previously flushed what should, by any measure, have been a wonderful marriage down the toilet of my own hubris, I find myself wondering if I can finally make this relationship stick.  Of course, no matter how good things are, it can still go south...but if it does, perish the thought, then I'm determined it won't be my fault - not again.

I'm also thrilled - it'll be a fresh start for both of us.  Nobody (aside from me, her doctor, the passport control officer and the Gender Recognition Panel) will know her history and I think she's looking forward to that.  Of course, I've told her that if we don't get the gender recognition certificate, then it'll be a civil partnership as opposed to a marriage, which is basically a whopping great "OUT!" for both of us (unless we don't invite anyone I know to the ceremony, which will be an eyebrow raiser in itself).

It won't change what we plan to do and there's always the risk that folks will find out her history sooner or later ... but it still has me sweating like a priest in a playground; the irrational fear of what others will say, what they will think.  It doesn't help that I can anticipate, with excruciating clarity, exactly what that will be.

To hell with it - the world be damned!  I already have my family's disapproval for the collapse of my previous marriage and as I prefer my own company, being a rather misanthropic hermit, I wouldn't mourn the loss of those "pseudo-friends" one acquires at work.   Frankly, the only thing I really fear is the loss of earnings (and job) due to the thinly veiled homophobic reaction in the office such news would inevitably engender.

Still - if there's one thing I've learnt from the posts of other folks here, it's that there's nothing more inspiring than courage in the face of adversity and prejudice...and if I can show just half the character that some other folks here have done, then I'll be all set.

I apologise for this dreary digression into my life.  I now return you to your regularly scheduled programming...

Any time a great life change happens, it can be a momentous challenge.  But the both of you are looking forward to it, so it should be fine.

As you two go forward in life, there will be challenges.  But I think with everything she has been through, and with you there by her side, you will over come them.

Best of Love ans Life to both of you, finewine.  I know many of us girls are jealous that she has such a fine man to care for her.

Give Shayna my love and takes some for yourself.


Janet

Aww you are SO sweet!  Thank you, I really appreciate that.  *hugs!*

Sounds like exciting things are happening :) Congrats!

WR

Quote from: heatherrose on October 26, 2009, 11:40:24 AM

At the risk of sounding like an ignert, what is a Gender Recognition Panel?
[...]

I did originally write an answer to this but then I checked their website and their front page description says it all ...

Quote
The Gender Recognition Panel assesses applications from transsexual people for legal recognition of the gender in which they now live.

The Panel was set up under the Gender Recognition Act 2004 and ensures that transsexual people can enjoy the rights and responsibilities appropriate to their acquired gender.

If a person is successful in their application to the Panel, they will be issued with a full Gender Recognition Certificate, and that person's gender will become, for all purposes, their acquired gender.

How did things go Finewine?

Dear Finewine and Shayna

I'm sorry I missed this post earlier, but no matter.

Shayna, I know that you are one of the luckiest girls in the world to meet and fall in love with a man like finewine. I also you know they are rare. Tolerance and love don't always seem to go together in men. But finewine has been a person of information, acceptance and understanding on these boards.

We live in a world were it is so easy to hate, and those that do so regard themselves as normal.

Love, acceptance and tolerance takes effort. No wonder the majority don't understand; it requires work :'(. Even in families the dichotomy is ever present.

I muse; sorry, What is love? Dare I say acceptance?

The greatest love is accepting someone because you love them. Sounds like an oxymoron but it isn't.


Hugs and Kisses

Cindy

We're back!!  Sorry for being quiet for a few days but I was in Manila helping Shayna move to the UK...and here we are.  Shayna is beside me right now reading this thread together (she says thank you to you all too!)

Happy to report no problems getting back, except for a buttock-numbing long flight..hehe!  Immigration was absolutely fine, although they wanted Shayna to have a quick health check (which was really just a chest x-ray) which is apparently standard for any immigrant from Asia who is likely to stay 6+ months or indefinitely.

The lady in the health clinic asked her if she was pregnant, bless! :)

Now that we're here and I have (finally) got the internet up and running, Shayna can get online...she says she'd like to come here and say hello for herself so I'll let her do that later.

Hugs to all...
finewine (Jim) & Shayna

Welcome back FW :icon_hug: and Hi Shayna  :icon_wave:  Pregnant :icon_blah:  :laugh:


Janet

Congrats Jim(finewine) and Shayna

Best wishes to both of you  :)

(which was really just a chest x-ray) which is apparently standard for any immigrant from Asia who is likely to stay 6+ months or indefinitely.

And that is because of the high rates currently of TB in a lot of Asian countries.

congrats jim (finewine) i envy you both and wish you the best
jessica

thank you folks :)  you lot really warm my heart, you know that?

:icon_chuckel:

I'm really happy for you two, now don't screw it up mister. Don't start farting in  bed and reading the newspaper instead of talking to her, and god please don't take for granted how much she loves you back. We aren't that hard to manage you know, just a little attention, some loyalty and an occasional romp and we'll make your life wonderful.

hi to all the good members here. it's me shayna i'm super duper happy because i'm in england now with my very handsome fiance.:)

thanks to all.. have a nice day

Hi Shayna  :)

Welcome to Susan's

:icon_chuckel:

Quote from: heatherrose on November 17, 2009, 11:38:39 AM

Heck with you, how's Finewine?

:icon_chuckel:

lol! I'm getting hungry, actually.  I think we'll go out for a nice Thai meal tonight, as I fancy one.

Oh just let me know your plans, I'll have a car pick you up from the airport and bring you down to the restaurant :)

Righto - off to get ready and go eat. ttfn