Susan's Place Transgender Resources

i hear people say that hormone replacement therapy is potent, and that from going on it, not only are there physical changes, but it seems to change you in so many other ways. i heard someone mention that their mindset has changed. my question is, what exactly is the difference between a male and female mindset? from searching through all the years, i've heard just about everything.

I've found many changes, but I went on hormones and full-time pretty much at the same time so I'm not sure how much of the effects are hormones.

I have greater emotional range.  I am less precise (picky) about things.  I am much friendlier and open.  I am far happier.  I feel at peace with myself and, usually, the world.  Somehow I've learned to listen to others better.  I have a much better idea of who I am.  I am beginning to feel whole for the first time in my life.  Men can look at me and get my insides feeling weird, which never happened before.  And there are other changes.  But none of these I would term a "mindset". 

In many ways I am the same as I always was, except freer and happier.  I'm not sure what kinds of mindset changes you mean.

- Kate

More emotional.  And guys!  I never looked at guys before, no interest in them.  But now OMG there are guys in the world that attract my attention.  Pitter Patter.  ::)  And I have noticed that I am sexually attracted to them, that never happened before.

Also more at peace with the world.  Things done bother me as much anymore.



Hugs and Love
Janet

I can definitely feel a shift towards peace. During the years I was off of HRT I wasn't quite the same. I'm not saying you'll leave you're close ones wondering who kidnapped the real you- but if this is what you really want. You'll definitely feel a sense of closure.

I feel somewhat like how K8 described the feelings. I know that for myself my emotions seem more sane. When I was off HRT I felt as if I was off-track and didn't know what planet I was on. Now that the biochemicals are finally catalyzing wonderfully in my body my sense of peace is more prominent.

Except when it comes to algebra  ;)

ps. oh and janet aren't they (guys) just the cutest :)

Quote from: Mia B on December 09, 2009, 08:44:04 PM
ps. oh and janet aren't they (guys) just the cutest :)

Yummy.  >:-)



Hugs and Love
Janet

I used to get overwhelmed. When I started to feel things it was like a whirlwind inside me would sweep it all up and just spin me around and set me back down a jumbled, frustrated mess. I used to tell my boyfriend "I am never having anti-you feelings, sometimes my anti-me feelings just come out that way." He of course didn't get it, but god bless him for trying.

The pressure was intense. My mother actually commented to me the other day that I was a lot easier to get along with before I went on hormones, BUT that I smile a lot more now. She's right, I don't brood anymore. I don't swallow feelings, I feel them as they come. This makes for a bit of a rough day every now and then but they wouldn't stay down even if I tried so why bother.

I find myself more able to concentrate, think logically and process. My grades have suffered because of my recent issues, but I have learned more than ever if that makes any sense at all. I'd rather have a C that I worked hard for than an A that I got with things I pulled out of my ear. It's hard to describe the differences in the way the world is perceived, it's really something you have to experience for yourself to get it because our language just doesn't have the right descriptions.

Boys were always the first choice, that didn't change or intensify really.

I actually got better at Algebra  ;)

Not like I'm intending to play the contrarion here but...

I have not experienced a lot of difference in mindset prior to and post hormones. Nothing that wasn't just as strong due to transition without the hormones anyway.

In my opinion and experience, the greatest part of any "mindset" change comes from deciding who you intend to be and how you intend to get there. And that doesn't depend on hormones so much as personal decisions and attitudes.

That's my opinion, anyway.

Keeping in mind that I'm only on t-blockers (no estrogen yet), I haven't felt anything I can reliably claim is the result of it.
I have been going through a veritable revolution in outlook, body language and manner of speaking...

But...
This started a little while before the t-blocker, and not after. It's probably the result of accepting what I tend towards doing, mannerisms-wise, and then not worrying so much about how it will be percieved.

The only things I know are the direct result of the t-blocker are the little bumps that showed up under the nipples. ^_^

I attribute my not losing my temper as easily to hormones. Whether or not that is fact, I'll leave up to the argumentative types.

i agree with lord kat on this i  have only been on them for 5 weeks and things that us to anoy the crap out of me no longer even dent my mood. its a blessing for me
jessica

I have been on HRT for about 6 months.

I am WAY calmer
I am patient
I have empathy now
My bad moods don't seem as intense as they used to be
Absolutely no anger now (i can still get mad but it stops there and doesn't escalate)
I was always somewhat attracted to guys but now I am VERY attracted to guys. Even though I lived my life as a straight male I really couldn't see myself date a woman now.
I am am totally happy and more outgoing now. I love me now!

6+ years.  I don't like football quite as much as I used to.  Sometimes I'll watch for awhile and find something more interesting on Bravo.  I'm more interested in nesting than I used to be.  I'm more vain about my appearance.  I'm far more nurturing and less focused as a sales person.  I cry far more easily.  I smile more.  I used to think in straight lines and sharp angles...now more in curves and waves.  Testosterone is like flying a fighter jet to where you want to go; estrogen is like taking a cruise on the ocean and making stops along the way for things you never noticed before, and not being upset if you're not there quite as fast.  More snuggly, less sex oriented.

Quote from: NicoleFoxFan on December 09, 2009, 05:48:48 PM
i hear people say that hormone replacement therapy is potent, and that from going on it, not only are there physical changes, but it seems to change you in so many other ways. i heard someone mention that their mindset has changed. my question is, what exactly is the difference between a male and female mindset? from searching through all the years, i've heard just about everything.

I think if you were like me and had a female mind set, attitude and persona long before HRT, it's not going to change by taking HRT.

Quote from: Naturally Blonde on December 17, 2009, 06:58:32 AM
I think if you were like me and had a female mind set, attitude and persona long before HRT, it's not going to change by taking HRT.

that's how it is for me.

I've been on hormones for a little over 8 months now.   ;D

I was just talking to a friend the other day.  I had mentioned that even though I'm going through some changes, I'm still the same person that I've always been.  He told me that I'm not the same person that I used to be, that I have changed in attitude, demeanor, and a couple of other things. But I forget what exactly.  That's one thing that I've noticed.  My memory doesn't quite work the same as it used to.  Also, less anger, and a whole lot more emotional.  It doesn't take much to set me off into a crying fit.  There have been a couple of times where it was "why am I crying and why can't I stop".  Less anger as well.  And a whole lot more at peace with myself.

I have become more of a neat freak over the last few months.  Not that I have the time to clean, but I do try to keep my home clean and tidy.

Some of it could be psychosomatic (?), but not everything can be attributed to that. 

I've noticed that I tend to think in a less linear fashion than I used to.  Often it seems that my mind is off on several threads at once.  It doesn't seem to affect my ability to concentrate or get things done; it just seems richer, more textured somehow.

- Kate

Hormones can greatly effect your "mindset" in regards to MTF as well as FTM.  Im my case, i felt more feminine, more abstract in thought processes. Thinking more about what ppl have to say and in reasoning with ppl.  This is not something that changed for me drastically, because i was always in a female mindset.  I always had the opposite gender specific role of a female than a male, that is why i had such difficulty when i was an adolescent.  I was never able to relate to men on a male/male relationship.  Whether it  be one on one or in groups, i was always an outcast.  It wasnt even sexual feeling, but in how i thought.  Later as i grew sexually, i was brought up by hetro parents, so naturally i tried, not knowing that i was even TG to have relationships with women, but when it came to intimacy i was always in the female mindset to even be able to perform.  I  didnt  even really know i was doing this, but even with the girl not knowing and her being hetro, i was in my  mind thinking more about me being satisfied as a woman would be.  It is rather confusing now that i reflect on it.  But to answer your question, yes hormones will help greatly in putting you in the "mindset" of the opposite sex, but as i have said b4, you can not change your character from one sex to the other if you are in fact not transgendered.  Sooner or later it will catch up with you.  Find out first if you truly are TG b4 and are ready b4 ever starting hormones, especially if you are a younger person and do not know for sure one way or the other. 

Have you ever read Woman are from Venus and men from Mars or heard the expression different as night and day.
Sarah

I didn't notice a thing.

I didn't get my T levels checked beforehand, but I suspect they were fairly low. Maybe that makes a difference. But the only thing that changed was my libido. My mind doesn't derail the way it used to when a beautiful woman walks by.

What really changed was my outlook on life: no longer would I have to worry about being "driven by testosterone" and I stopped worrying about all the changes my testosterone were continuing to effect upon my body.

But everything else is the same. I don't cry more, I'm not more "in touch" with my emotions, etc.

A falacy many fall into is generalizing to all what has been their own personal experience.  Unless you're a clinician or therapist who has seen hundreds of cases, speaking authoritatively about how things "are" or "will be" or "should be" for any person confronting trans issues is probably ill-advised.  This is a very complex issue and although there are similarities in many cases, everyone is an individual and responds to hormones in varying ways. 

i have noticed a change too after six monthes on hrt, first thing my mother noticed when i was buying a new clothes and i picked up pink piece of cloth, my mother was surprised and said that my taste and fashion is changed, i can set colour together, i am also become more calm, i am critisizing clothes other women wear, another thing, i never liked red or pink colors, now, i love these colors very much, i smile alot, but this color thing, i don't know

I feel a lot of the mindset changes I've seen (and there have been loads) probably have more to do with being happy than with changes in my hormonal makeup.  Going from rock-bottom: furious, hopeless, and slowly losing the will to live; to omg-happy and loving life in a few short months will have an effect on one's mindset, believe me!

There have been a couple things I've noticed that I think probably do fall outside the effect-of-being-happy realm.  The first being that my sexuality became a little less ambiguous, and second but not least I find babies and small children far more adorable than before.  Nothing earth shaking, I guess =P.

But omg, overall the effect on my outlook in life is night and day.  I was looking through some pictures the other day, comparing the expression on my face before hormones to recent ones and it was pretty astonishing to see such a huge difference.  Very cool!

I would NOT say I feel like I'm a different person or anything.  I'm just me, minus the angst.  Happier, friendlier, more patient, affectionate, peaceful... all of that stuff, but I really think those attributes have more to do with removing bad emotions and revealing the good ones underneath than adding things to my personality that weren't ever there to begin with.  If that makes sense?

YMMV-- is that the acronym?  I think so :).

That's an interesting thought.

One thing that I notice is that I see things like facebook comments or something that are "hyper girliey" (and I mean from ciswomen here) in reference to a baby pic or something (I have a neice with a newborn who constantly uses expressions like "our dear little family" and such) and I sometimes feel like I'm "not girly enough" that i don't squeal "OH! How PRECIOUS!!" when someone posts a baby pick.

It is totally stupid and unreasonable of me but i sometimes wonder what it would be like  - not just to go through the motions but to ACTUALLY THINK the little bugger is "precious"...

Quote from: Laura Hope on January 07, 2010, 02:54:36 AM
....It is totally stupid and unreasonable of me but i sometimes wonder what it would be like  - not just to go through the motions but to ACTUALLY THINK the little bugger is "precious"...

I went a long time worrying about the same thing, thinking I was bitter because of my situation and promising my mum that after 'everything' that I will be more maternal and want to spend time with my nephews and nieces.
I've been told it can develop with hormones after enough time (not sure how far you're in) but I don't know, there are plenty of CIS girls out there that cringe at the thought of holding a baby. *shrugs*.
If it changes at least just a little then I'd be happy, but I won't force it. :P

Besides all the generic HRT stuff like sexuality, mood, attitude, perspective, happiness, blah blah, I am cooking a LOT more as time permits. And trying to feed my parents what I buy/make. Insistent on it.

I'm becoming an old Italian woman. (1/4th Italian, 1/4th French... food is in my blood.)

Quote from: Naturally Blonde on December 17, 2009, 06:58:32 AMI think if you were like me and had a female mind set, attitude and persona long before HRT, it's not going to change by taking HRT.

i'll "ditto" that too - the idea is to be more yourself than something or someone your "not"! Lately wife now says i've become more "sweet" but somehow i don't think she means that in a complimentary sort of way! For me it's the difference between being a "feminine looking dad" or a "dad that wants to be female"; i'd rather accent that which i already am as opposed to trying to appear as something i obviously cannot . . .

"Er, excuse me [sir] but are you their mother (or grandmother)"  ??? From all quarters I've been getting this alot!