General Discussions => Entertainment => Humor => Topic started by: Janet_Girl on February 08, 2010, 09:10:09 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Dogs and cats
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 08, 2010, 09:10:09 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 08, 2010, 09:10:09 PM
I get some funny stuff from some gals I know. Here is the latest.
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary......
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...
Day 983 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the TOP of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe..... For now..............
Excerpts from a Dog's Diary......
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
Excerpts from a Cat's Daily Diary...
Day 983 of my captivity...
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.
Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.
Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow -- but at the TOP of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.
The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe..... For now..............
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Flan on February 08, 2010, 09:29:06 PM
Post by: Flan on February 08, 2010, 09:29:06 PM
\o/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8wtbeiqz5U# (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8wtbeiqz5U#)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8wtbeiqz5U# (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8wtbeiqz5U#)
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 08, 2010, 10:17:41 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 08, 2010, 10:17:41 PM
Such a cute puppy and on vacation too.
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: V M on February 08, 2010, 10:48:11 PM
Post by: V M on February 08, 2010, 10:48:11 PM
LOL..... Day 983 of my captivity...
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Muffin on August 05, 2010, 04:45:30 AM
Post by: Muffin on August 05, 2010, 04:45:30 AM
lol!!!!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ficanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com%2F2008%2F02%2Ffunny-pictures-civil-disobedience-cat.jpg&hash=754bdc7230b095c9813d7aa320ca86272485b6c9)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ficanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com%2F2008%2F02%2Ffunny-pictures-civil-disobedience-cat.jpg&hash=754bdc7230b095c9813d7aa320ca86272485b6c9)
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: spinaltap on August 05, 2010, 07:01:04 AM
Post by: spinaltap on August 05, 2010, 07:01:04 AM
lol, that was pretty funny, a very fun/creative interpretation of cat behavior.
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on August 06, 2010, 09:24:00 AM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on August 06, 2010, 09:24:00 AM
Lol Janet, thanks for posting it.
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: confused on August 06, 2010, 10:25:20 AM
Post by: confused on August 06, 2010, 10:25:20 AM
lol.yup ,that's most likely what they are thinking -_-
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Shang on August 06, 2010, 10:30:49 AM
Post by: Shang on August 06, 2010, 10:30:49 AM
That's great! I laughed because it's possibly true.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi654.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu261%2FMauvaisAnge%2Fkittens.jpg&hash=19017a1d7f25d3b2aeb8e33fcd6664e7f991cda7)
See the gray kitten (he was named Spanky)? He was completely plotting how best to get my dog to listen to him.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi654.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu261%2FMauvaisAnge%2Fkittens.jpg&hash=19017a1d7f25d3b2aeb8e33fcd6664e7f991cda7)
See the gray kitten (he was named Spanky)? He was completely plotting how best to get my dog to listen to him.
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: insanitylives on August 08, 2010, 04:28:51 PM
Post by: insanitylives on August 08, 2010, 04:28:51 PM
Quote from: Shang on August 06, 2010, 10:30:49 AMAnd you see that little fuzzball?
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi654.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fuu261%2FMauvaisAnge%2Fkittens.jpg&hash=19017a1d7f25d3b2aeb8e33fcd6664e7f991cda7)
Thou Shalt Not Eat, Lest I Claw Thouest Eyes Out.
[yes, i have a sick sense of humor]
Title: Re: Dogs and cats
Post by: Shang on August 08, 2010, 04:40:24 PM
Post by: Shang on August 08, 2010, 04:40:24 PM
Sweetpea? I wouldn't doubt he was thinking that. He was really mischievous, but not as much as Spanky...Spanky was the master of ninja attacks on your feet while you sleep.