Susan's Place Transgender Resources

So I've sort of been contacting numerous therapists via email and I got my first reply from one today. None of them were gender specialists as there is none in my town.

This was what I said and then her reply.
(Note, I really had no idea what to put for a message. If anyone knows what exactly I should then please do say so. I just don't want to waste time and money at some therapist that can't actually help me get started on everything.) Sorry for the arrows. Was copied from my email.

Quote
> Hiya. I was just looking over some different therapists in
> my area.
> There isn't really any gender-specialists that are too
> close to my
> town, but I've been told by a handful of people that a
> regular
> therapist can do the same things.
>
> What I'm asking is if you offer therapy to people with
> gender
> dysphoria? And if it's possible to start Hormone
> Replacement Therapy
> after seeing you for a certain amount of time; meaning can
> you supply
> letters to proceed with HRT?
> In order for doctors to prescribe hormones, they need a
> letter from
> the patient's therapist saying she/he meets the diagnostic
> criteria for
> Gender Identity Disorder and is making an informed decision
> to
> transition; so I was just asking if all this was possible
> through your
> therapy services.
>
> Thanks!

The response:

Quote
Hi,
Sorry for the lapse time in replying but I was out of town over the weekend.

I have had 2 previous clients with these concerns, but each case is different so there are no hard and fast rules.  I would expect to meet with you for a typical intake assessment and if we both decide to work together, further sessions as well as some psychological testing/evaluation is needed before any recommendations can be made.  This is a serious process and no certain recommendations or even time frame can be established without adequate time to make an informed opinion/recommendation. Some of the factors involve include your age, support system and family impact.

So if this sounds like something you would like to pursue we can set up the initial appointment by phone (704) 880-2384.  You may also wish to contact your insurance company to determine if counseling for these concerns are covered by your policy. Looking forward to hearing from you,

So uhh. I didn't really like the sound of that.
For one.. testing? I don't want some therapist judging me by test results. Is that normal? And I also don't like the idea of my age being a factor. Doesn't sound like a very reasonable therapist if you ask me.. but I figured I'd see what some of you thought.

Not having dealt with any therapists yet myself, I feel like shes giving off a more professional vibe.  Well age is not an issue (in my opinion anyways) she might believe it so if you are younger and lacking a support system as pointed out in her response.

I would say its a very professional response based on the information you provided; no idea what the testing may be but I wouldn't get to concerned about what the therapist replied with. 

The response does seem positive and I like the fact the therapist stated that you both have to decide to work together.

I guess I'll maybe work on setting something up. I'd like to hear some other responses before I settle with her though. I don't want her to wind up being against me transitioning because I'm young.

Quote from: SkylitLove on April 06, 2010, 12:06:34 AM
I guess I'll maybe work on setting something up. I'd like to hear some other responses before I settle with her though. I don't want her to wind up being against me transitioning because I'm young.

I doubt she would be against you but it is important to find a therapist you feel comfortable with and don't think it is your fault if you meet with this one and decide it isn't working.

right, right. I definitely want someone I can feel comfortable with. I sort of have ideas in my head of who will work and who won't.. but I guess I'll need to meet with her before making any judgements.

I was planning on waiting a bit first. I turn 18 in about a month. I'd rather be able to do it all on my own since I haven't came out to my family.

Although the therapist mentioned insurance.. which I do not have.. I don't really know what to do there.

Reply and ask if she functions on a sliding scale or if she knows any colleagues in the area who might be willing to work with you as such.

Also, yes, professional response. You wrote her a letter asking for hormones. That's going to raise the ire of any therapist, even ones in your court. Also, psychological evaluation is used both to judge your current state of transition, and to see if there are any comorbid problems (such as bipolar, childhood sexual assault, fetishism, etc.) You probably won't even notice them doing it, because, seriously, ink blot tests are old.

When I first met my therapist, she adored me and was confused why I wasn't fulltime already. She couldn't stop gushing about my body language, word choice, appearance, progress with laser hair removal and AA etc. I passed quite often without the confidence to try.

My friend, who saw her after I suggested it, did not hit it off well at all. She had to go for more visits, and her HRT recommendation letter was very, very cold. She sent me one through the mail at a discount.

My friend made it clear from the very beginning that she wanted to transition and did not see any reason for therapy and was only seeing her for the letter.

Don't spite the gatekeepers. Plus, honestly, trained therapists can really be quite helpful. I was on the fence about transition, but talking to her actually gave me the courage to move forward.

I don't see any problem with the reply.

I didn't ask for hormones. I wrote her asking if she'd ever write a letter if the patient met the criteria to receive them because I'm not going to go spend my time and money to see a therapist that will never agree to writing a letter for me to do so, because I've heard of some that just don't.

Yes, I would like someone to talk about this with but I also want to eventually be able to start transition as an effect from doing so.

And honestly, not to bash the therapist but I wouldn't consider it the most professional response seeing as I had to correct around 10 mis-spellings before posting it here.

But I'll message her back asking about the sliding scale.

edit:
Just messaged her saying a little this and that and then asking about the sliding scale. I guess I'll go from there to see what she says next.

"testing", as I understand it, refers to filling out little answers in a little evaluation paper to "estimate" your level of stress, depression, anxiety and such. I've done a few of those. They're harmless and rather accurate.
My therapist uses 'em more to see how severely my situation is affecting me than anything else.

oh. well if that's the case then that'll be alright.

---

Post Merge: April 06, 2010, 08:11:52 PM

---

eh.

she replied

"Hello,

No I don't operate on a sliding scale and neither do most private practice therapist.  In Iredell County you may want to contact The Counseling Center of Iredell.  If you live in another county you can usually call the United Way to get a referral to an agency that may offer sliding scale services.  I hope you find a comfortable fit.

Elaine"

   There is a test / evaluation by Harry Benjamin that is used by some.    That may be what is being referred to.

I think her response was reasonable, she has past experience and would like to do an intake session, after if you both click you can set up more sessions.

The majority of therapists follow the Standards of Care (SOC), many require an MMPI (The Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory) be  taken.

Everything she has said is reasonable, some things like the MMPI will come after a few months, and the psychological evaluation is needed to get your 2 letters for surgery, which will come somewhere after your 1 year RLT, each therapist is different, this is how mine did it.

She does seem interested, she could have said she does not take trans patients, i think she is worth a shot, if after a few sessions you feel she is not helping, you can fire her and look for another therapist.

Paula

Quote from: SkylitLove on April 05, 2010, 11:27:57 PM
So uhh. I didn't really like the sound of that.
For one.. testing? I don't want some therapist judging me by test results. Is that normal? And I also don't like the idea of my age being a factor. Doesn't sound like a very reasonable therapist if you ask me.. but I figured I'd see what some of you thought.

I agree with the others, it sounds like something a professional therapist would say.  Coming from someone who has seen several therapists, an intake interview is the norm.  I agree with her that age, support system, and family impact are all very valid points. 

Sounds like a promising counselor, imo.

okay. thanks everyone. I quit e-mailing her a bit back.

I told her around now wasn't the best time and that I was just looking around for therapists to get a jump start.

I plan on setting up an actual appointment somewhere after early June.

The main reason is because I'm 17 (my birthday is in June) and live at home with my parents and haven't told one family member about all of this yet. It might seem smart to tell them before I start getting therapy for this all but I just don't know if I can, yet. Just with the way they are, especially with how religious they are.. I know they won't take it well and I'm afraid of the results. I plan on getting my own place sooner or later which will come early on in any sort of transition so it should be alright. Once I'm more stable on my own then I'll probably explain to my parents what's up, but for now I'm sort of keeping it quiet.

So yeahh, hopefully I'll get together some money and after I turn 18 I'll set up an appointment with the therapist.

being young and starting this journey is best, you will have a lifetime of memories in your soul gender, but that also puts in incredible resposibility on the councelors shoulders your life is in her hands, it is so important that she draws out your motivation, your dilemma, disphoria to draw them out so she can see and so you can see, so your choices are more firmly established, or you may need more time to consider. This is an incredibly important discision and to do this with a overseer is wise. Now if the overseer has preconceived ideas..... if you don't feel comfortable, you don't have a peace about it .... if I don't feel comfortable about someone i'm out of there.

I am 55 years old and have been in conflict all of my life, i have been closited until about fall 2009, I want to go full transition, I have been on phytoestrogen type herbs since November 09 Oh how I love being estrogen driven, for me things are in so much better order in my mind and soul, I have been confused trying to be something that I was not, coming out of the closit for me was realizing I am a woman inside, trying to be a man has been a confusing journey. My mom said to me one time when I was about 15 yrs old that some people are born with both sex's She is gone now but i so wish I would have talked to her but I was so paranoid then. i wish I could talk to her now, but thats me.

It is good that you are young, and it is wise to have a overseer.

Wishing You The Best
Joni