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Title: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 19, 2010, 07:22:55 AM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 19, 2010, 07:22:55 AM
Hi there, these intro post always make me nervous, I never know what to say or if I'm saying too much or too little. I guess the basics are I am FTM transgender and gay, both of which I am completely comfortable with. I decided to transition last summer, however it first came up when I was 16 but I couldn't move ahead with it at the time because I was just starting out on my own with no money or support.
I lived as a straight female until last summer, but I've always been fairly androgynous. Now I'm 28 and feel like I wasted too much time, and worry that I'm a fraud for taking so long. Since my decision I've been working on "passing" and getting those close to me to accept my preferred gender. My husband is having a hard time with it because we also decided to separate so I can start the life I've always wanted, and also because he's not gay.
I started seeing a therapist last week and I'm glad that he accepted to used my male name, it was exciting to hear for the first time. My main goal with him is guidance on starting HRT. I'm frustrated with the time it's taking to start T and I hope it happens soon and without too much hassle. I also see another counselor for depression, anxiety and social phobia which I hope will lessen when I transition
I'm excited about my transition and being who I've wanted to be for so long, and for a new life where I hope to be more confident and less isolated. But I'm stressed about the changes regarding the divorce and starting my life over once again from the ground up. I have no choice than to go ahead with it, I can't spend the rest of my life trapped like this.
That's about it, I'm just looking for people to talk to and learn from. I have been doing research for several months and might have something to offer you guys too.
I lived as a straight female until last summer, but I've always been fairly androgynous. Now I'm 28 and feel like I wasted too much time, and worry that I'm a fraud for taking so long. Since my decision I've been working on "passing" and getting those close to me to accept my preferred gender. My husband is having a hard time with it because we also decided to separate so I can start the life I've always wanted, and also because he's not gay.
I started seeing a therapist last week and I'm glad that he accepted to used my male name, it was exciting to hear for the first time. My main goal with him is guidance on starting HRT. I'm frustrated with the time it's taking to start T and I hope it happens soon and without too much hassle. I also see another counselor for depression, anxiety and social phobia which I hope will lessen when I transition
I'm excited about my transition and being who I've wanted to be for so long, and for a new life where I hope to be more confident and less isolated. But I'm stressed about the changes regarding the divorce and starting my life over once again from the ground up. I have no choice than to go ahead with it, I can't spend the rest of my life trapped like this.
That's about it, I'm just looking for people to talk to and learn from. I have been doing research for several months and might have something to offer you guys too.
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Janet_Girl on April 19, 2010, 07:49:22 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on April 19, 2010, 07:49:22 PM
Hi Hurtfulsplash, :icon_wave:
Welcome to our little family. Over 4500 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another brother. :icon_hug:
And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )
Hugs and Love,
Janet
Welcome to our little family. Over 4500 strong. That would be one heck of a family reunion.
Feel free to post your successes/failures, Hopes/dreams. Ask questions and seek answers. Give and receive advice.
But remember we are family here, your family now. And it is always nice to have another brother. :icon_hug:
And be sure to check out these links ( MUST READS )
- Site Terms of Service and rules to live by (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,2.0.html)
- Standard Terms and Definitions (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,54369.0.html)
- Post Ranks ( including when you can upload an avatar) (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,114.0.html.)
Hugs and Love,
Janet
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 05:10:26 AM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 05:10:26 AM
Hi Janet, and thanks for the welcome.
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: jesse on April 20, 2010, 05:23:42 AM
Post by: jesse on April 20, 2010, 05:23:42 AM
welcome to susans
jessica
jessica
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Katelyn-W on April 20, 2010, 05:33:16 AM
Post by: Katelyn-W on April 20, 2010, 05:33:16 AM
Welcome! :icon_wave:
In regards to transitioning/hormones helping... I like to think hormones are my miracle drug :laugh:, work better than any anti-depressant could ever hope to do for me. I use to be a depressed wreck that just wanted to stay in bed :'(. Transitioning has really helped, I'm happier now, less anxiety, more confident, and I've only been full time around 2 weeks (HRT started a month ago). I'm actually going out meeting people, trying to make new friends, never felt this happy in a long time. Everyone is different though, and I'm very lucky in regards that my family has been very accepting. Anyways I'll stop rambling about myself :P, hope everyone works out for you in this stressful time :).
In regards to transitioning/hormones helping... I like to think hormones are my miracle drug :laugh:, work better than any anti-depressant could ever hope to do for me. I use to be a depressed wreck that just wanted to stay in bed :'(. Transitioning has really helped, I'm happier now, less anxiety, more confident, and I've only been full time around 2 weeks (HRT started a month ago). I'm actually going out meeting people, trying to make new friends, never felt this happy in a long time. Everyone is different though, and I'm very lucky in regards that my family has been very accepting. Anyways I'll stop rambling about myself :P, hope everyone works out for you in this stressful time :).
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 05:59:29 AM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 05:59:29 AM
Thank you Jessica.
Wow, that sounds just like me Katelyn, your results sound very promising and I hope I have similar results.
Wow, that sounds just like me Katelyn, your results sound very promising and I hope I have similar results.
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Little Dragon on April 20, 2010, 06:49:14 AM
Post by: Little Dragon on April 20, 2010, 06:49:14 AM
Teehee! Welcome, hon! I wish you luck with the hormone therapy! I've still ta go on the hormones, myself, but I'm happy with how I am :) Hope ya have a nice time here :police:
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 09:06:07 PM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 20, 2010, 09:06:07 PM
Hello Little Dragon, I hope I have a nice time here too. Thanks for the welcome.
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: BlackWolf on April 21, 2010, 02:26:52 PM
Post by: BlackWolf on April 21, 2010, 02:26:52 PM
Welcome! congrats on the transition and i'm glad you're finally becoming comfortable with you :D
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 22, 2010, 09:32:36 AM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 22, 2010, 09:32:36 AM
Thanks BlackWolf
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: gennee on April 22, 2010, 12:55:13 PM
Post by: gennee on April 22, 2010, 12:55:13 PM
Hi Hurtfulsplash and welcome. I'm happy that you have decided to live your life as your true self. I'm sorry about your impending divorce. It's sad that this happens but I pray that the two of you remain on good terms.
Gennee
:)
Gennee
:)
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Karla on April 22, 2010, 08:48:04 PM
Post by: Karla on April 22, 2010, 08:48:04 PM
Hurtfulsplash,
Glad to have you here (btw thank you for the welcome), glad also that you found your destination. No matter how early we start, we'll probably still wish it was sooner. But just being here fills me with inspiration.
Indeed, I also feel our paths have alot in common (despite being superficially diverging).
I have much less to deal with regarding relationships (none), friends (acquaintances more than anything), family... I purged most of them, along with a whole continent, I wish I'd done things more gracefully but that's the way it goes.
And like Gennee said, the both of you will doubtlessly feel much better if you parted on friendly, understanding terms.
It is very nice to meet you, and welcome :)
Glad to have you here (btw thank you for the welcome), glad also that you found your destination. No matter how early we start, we'll probably still wish it was sooner. But just being here fills me with inspiration.
Indeed, I also feel our paths have alot in common (despite being superficially diverging).
I have much less to deal with regarding relationships (none), friends (acquaintances more than anything), family... I purged most of them, along with a whole continent, I wish I'd done things more gracefully but that's the way it goes.
And like Gennee said, the both of you will doubtlessly feel much better if you parted on friendly, understanding terms.
It is very nice to meet you, and welcome :)
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: kyril on April 22, 2010, 09:47:53 PM
Post by: kyril on April 22, 2010, 09:47:53 PM
Hi! Looks like there are a fair number of us in the same situation (trans, gay, married, mid 20s, starting transition). Nice to meet you, and welcome.
Title: Re: Hello
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 27, 2010, 01:49:30 PM
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on April 27, 2010, 01:49:30 PM
Thanks for the greetings Gennee and Karla, I'm sure that my partner and I will separate on good terms, it still makes me nervous though, a lot of changes coming up.
Nice to meet you too Kyril, I had a feeling that there were a fair number of us, and its nice to meet one of them.
Cheers
Nice to meet you too Kyril, I had a feeling that there were a fair number of us, and its nice to meet one of them.
Cheers