Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I have a sister eight years my junior.  She is married to the greatest guy in the world.  She is so well grounded, far more than I.  I just love her to death!  But she has admitted she's feeling a little funny about the brother she has known all her life to present himself as female.  But that never lessened her support.  She's such a sweetheart!

I have been very passive about pushing myself on my family.  My older sister seemed to have absolutely no problem.  And when we had dinner together she was full of compliments.  But my little sis hasn't seen me in person.  Lately I have been flooding her with pictures and she was even so kind to say I made a cute girl. 

Then the subject of holidays came up.  I let her know I was thinking I would be spending Thanksgiving with TS friends.  But I also said I didn't know why I couldn't spend the holidays with my family.  She came back with an invitation to spend Thanksgiving with her and her family.  She has the coolest family in the world!  They are all so amazing!  And she's been keeping them abreast with what's going on in my life so there's no surprises.

So this Thanksgiving I will be spending the day with my sister, brother-in-law and four nephews.  It will be a great time.  Yes, I am nervous, very nervous, but I will put my best foot forward and do my best to let them know this strange abberation is who I am.  Wish me luck!

Julie

Awesome, it doesn't get any better than that!  Enjoy, love and be loved.

Hooray, Julie.  Enjoy; it will be a fun teachable moment. 

Hugs

Robyn

Julie that's just so wonderful to hear !! Have a Great Time !

Jamie

That's GREAT news, Julie!

Thanksgiving, a time of home, hearth, and family.  May you have all that and more!

-Sandy

Oh that so wonderful Julie.
Don't worry about comeing across, just be yourself.
Your a super lady.
So have a great Thanksgiving.
:) :)
Jillieann/JR

Julie that is great!
I'm happy for you!
We had sour news i guess my nephew who is 13 wants to spend time with his uncle (his mom's brother) and they are going away which means he will not be with us thanksgiving and his dad is currently in jail?  So my mom is devastated about this!  she's a one thought machine though and only sees in her way maybe this is why its so hard?
I do not care really and understand his choices and how rough his life has been...
anyway hope it goes well! 
So Julie?????  What are we going to wear to sis'...?????

How wonderfull, Julie.  I'm so happy for you!
It's OK to be nervous, but just be yourself and things will go fine.

Here's hoping you have the time of your life...

........Laurie

Julie,

Thank you for the support. Tomorrow's the big day and I'm still a bit nervous. I have known her family for over 20 years and have known her all my life. And they all have only known a man. I'm sure there was some talk within the family I was "different" but to see the real me in the flesh I'm sure will take them for a loop.

What will I wear?  Well, the possibilities have been passing through my head like they were on a conveyor belt.  "The first impression is a lasting impression."  Even though they all know me I know that seeing me as Julie will cause some doubt about how well they know me.  If I could hide this for so long...

But I want to present myself as a woman.  That I am inside really won't be seen so I have to make what's outside reflect what's inside.  At first I was going to wear a beige skirt and tan suede leather boots, a sparkling gold V-neck sweater top, practical earrings and a ladies watch.  Nothing too dressy but not too casual.  Then my sister tells me it's a simple blue jean affair and to dress casual.  So now I'm thinking tan corduroys, open toe sandals and layered tops.  The pants don't help much with hiding what's still "down there" and I fear I might be self conscious about that.

While I am looking forward to this, part of me wants it over.  This waiting is becoming nerve racking!

Julie

You'll find out that you will do fine.  I remember that my first family get together was for my grandfather's funeral.  It was difficult under the circumstances, but it came off fine.  Regardless of what any single person of your family thinks, they will all be civil and gracious.  This will be one of the biggest and best remembered days of your life.

Cindi

Awl, Julie you'll do fine! Just try to not overthink TOO much, and just be you! Maybe pretend you've done this a hundred times before, and just dress instinctively, whatever seems to come to mind. Sometimes I'll pretend I HAVE done something, like I'm already used to it, then try to creatively "remember" how I did it. Try to put the event into a "been there, done that" context rather than worry and do something special for a first impression.

Besides, with that personality of yours, they're gonna be so focused on loving and laughing with you, I'm sure the clothing will soon be forgotten after that initial moment.

Unless we're talking fishnets, miniskirt and tube top... ;)

Julie:

What are you bringing to the party?  A pie or dessert or something?  Maybe that is what you should be thinking about instead of trying on every top you have...

Besides if you started now, you'd be late for the party by time you tried them all on :D

Casual means without effort.  When it's time to get ready just open up your closet and grab the closest slacks and top that match and go with it!  Then accessorize appropriately.  A little makeup and you're out the door.  Don't forget the dessert!

They are already expecting to see you, the real you, so don't worry about it!  Are you afraid you'll pick out something too butch?  Fat chance!  Besides, after tomorrow there will be lots of times you can show off that wonderful wardrobe of yours to them.

Relax, or do I have to come over there and get Zen on your butt?

You're going to have a fine time!  Enjoy it!

-Sandy

So how did it go?  Said a prayer that it would be a wonderful expereince for you and your family.  What did you end up wearing?  Any problem with jeans/casual dress?  Hope you feel a lot better now that this milestone is under your belt.

Peace,

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fganjataz.com%2F01smileys%2Fimages%2Fsmileys%2FloopyBlonde-blinking.gif&hash=4545ddf8251cf9c32ae6074d56e48bc34a755857) Kristi

Just got back from my sister's.  It was wonderful!  When I got there everyone was there and they were all waiting for me to arrive so they could eat.  They said 3-4, I pulled up at 3:05.  I walked in and one by one gave everyone a hug.  Jim would have hugged his sister and shook hands with the rest.  One of my nephews had his girlfriend there and she was in line waiting for her hug.  I felt so welcomed! 

My brother-in-law made a playful comment, we all laughed and for the rest of the night it was the same as it's always been.  Well, there was one exception.  For the first time in my life I was with my family and comfortable in my own skin.  My sister said it showed.  She's such a sweetheart!

The conversation was the usual stuff, catching up on things.  They talked about the boat they bought and how much they enjoy it.  I talked about living my life as a woman and how much I enjoy that.   ;D  It was a very pleasant evening and I think we all learned from the experience.  What I learned is not to stress over things so much.  It's a waste of time.

I told my sister and her family how wonderful you all are.  They were happy I had a place to go to get understanding and support.  So am I.

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.  Thanks again for helping me through my nervous moments.  That helped get me out the door.

Well, I should get some rest.  Tomorrow is day 8 of 11 straight days being free from masculinity.  I'm hoping my boss finds some more work for me to do at home so I can make it an even dozen.  :)

Julie

Congratulation Julie.  I am so glad (and a bit envious) it went so well for you.

Melissa

Julie!

I am sooooooo happy for you!!  It sounds like you had a wonderful time!  I'm so glad!

The thing that you didn't mention in your post, after all that worry and wonder, WHAT OUTFIT DID YOU FINALLY PICK????????

Inquiring minds want to know, girl!

-Sandy

Julie,
   I'm so happy for you. I think now you have learned that fear can be conquered. I'm so happy that you felt like yourself and that you are looking for many more days of happiness.
Sheila

Quote from: Kassandra on November 24, 2006, 08:43:21 AM
The thing that you didn't mention in your post, after all that worry and wonder, WHAT OUTFIT DID YOU FINALLY PICK????????

Inquiring minds want to know, girl!

It was nothing to write home about.  In fact when I saw the other girls there I felt a bit underdressed.  I could have used a little more jewelry or something!  Being with two natural beauties made me look like the ugly step sister. 

Since a picture tells a thousand words here's a picture taken at the dinner table.  My sister is sitting next to me but since I don't have her permission to post it I cut her out.  It takes away from the beauty of being with family but I have to respect her privacy.  Sitting next to her I look like an ugly lug.  She's such a beautiful person, inside and out.

Quote from: Julie Marie on November 24, 2006, 11:05:36 AM

Quote from: Kassandra on November 24, 2006, 08:43:21 AM
The thing that you didn't mention in your post, after all that worry and wonder, WHAT OUTFIT DID YOU FINALLY PICK????????

Inquiring minds want to know, girl!

It was nothing to write home about.  In fact when I saw the other girls there I felt a bit underdressed.  I could have used a little more jewelry or something!  Being with two natural beauties made me look like the ugly step sister. 

Since a picture tells a thousand words here's a picture taken at the dinner table.  My sister is sitting next to me but since I don't have her permission to post it I cut her out.  It takes away from the beauty of being with family but I have to respect her privacy.  Sitting next to her I look like an ugly lug.  She's such a beautiful person, inside and out.

(https://home.comcast.net/~julimarie/image_files/11-06/TGiving_06.jpg)

You look great, Julie!
And you look very feminine to me. And, no you do not have men's hands in the slightest.

im late but thats wonderfull

Julie,
    You look very nice. In fact you are gorgeous. You have nothing to worry about.
Sheila

Wowser. Julie!  No wonder they were so accepting.  Anyone still thinking you're a guy would prob'ly be hauled off by the white coated guys for a perception adjustment!

I'm thrilled that it went so well for you!

hugs & smiles,
helen

Quote from: Julie Marie on November 23, 2006, 11:50:56 PM

.
.
.
Well, there was one exception.  For the first time in my life I was with my family and comfortable in my own skin.  My sister said it showed.  She's such a sweetheart!

The conversation was the usual stuff, catching up on things.  They talked about the boat they bought and how much they enjoy it.  I talked about living my life as a woman and how much I enjoy that.   ;D  It was a very pleasant evening and I think we all learned from the experience.  What I learned is not to stress over things so much.  It's a waste of time.

Julie

Juile,

I can so relate people are saying I and getting more comfortable with who I am - it is such a nice feeling. I am glad you had a great thanksgiving.

Alice

Julie,
P.S. I'm envious of your hair!

Julie!
You look wonderful!
My sister is pretty too and we often get told we share similiar features or you know how people say "ya i can see how you two are related"..Etc..
But you look great in the pic!  Gald you had a good time too!
Ricki

Julie glad to hear your Thanksgiving went GREAT !
You really look Wonderful !

Jamie L.