Susan's Place Transgender Resources

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The Dilemma:
In the topic "Gifts for Androgynes" https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,8356.0.html it has come to my attention that we need to address a vital dilemma. Either Fruitcake is a acceptable and tolerant gift that is eadible and sometimes good, or is it a cursed spawn of satan that plagues the very fiber of society and humanity itself.

Some people believe that there is only one true "Fruitcake", one that travels from house to house visiting the entire population of earth. A single gift given to all of humanity, much like Santa Claus, only appears around Christmas holidays, only to disappear and reappear mysteriously the next year.

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Fruitcake: A Spawn from Hell

I am sure the philosophers Laurie and Tinkerbell would agree with such claim and even bring up some credible evidence.

QuoteChunk, Chunk, Chunk...did you ever wonder why some families have been passing the same fruitcake around for the last 40 years?  Be careful opening that present from Aunt Mabel, remember, we dumped the fruitcake on her last year!!!

OK, I admit that I have tasted some very good fruitcakes, but those are few and far between.  There is a very good reason why not liking fruitcake is an American Cliche'...it is because so many of them weigh 50 pounds a slice and taste like fishing-worm dirt and old tires.

Laurie

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QuoteIs it?  the perfect gift, I mean?  oh good, I have one which I have been recycling for almost six years.

Tinkerbell

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Fruitcake: A slice of Heaven
Others would disagree. And not only fight for the rights of multi fruitcakes , but even delve into going where it seems half of the world dare not go, into an actual slice of fruitcake and partake of its substance.

QuoteThe only thing I like at Christmas is to be invited over to parties and dinners throughout the season - and slices of FRUITCAKE!!!!!

Chunk

QuoteFruitcake is by nature androgenous, therefore it is the perfect gift. There is light fruitcake as well as dark fruit cake. Some has a coating of marzipan while others have that stickiness on top. Some has a higher cake to fruit ratio then others.
Chunk

QuoteSome of us do like Fruit cake. My mom use to make the best. Of course the rum was here secret and she never gave me her recipe.

Jillieann/JR

Conclusion?:
I could not find , in the pages that I looked of photos any picture of anyone eating fruitcake. So to that side of the dilemma, I have no concrete evidence that anyone has even eaten fruitcake. I have seen several pictures of it cut up, and sitting on a table. I have also seen different types of fruitcake, which may disprove that fruitcake is only ONE single cake being passed around, unless that fruitcake is magical and can change forms and regenerate (become whole after being cut up).

Society whose mission it is to preserve fruitcakes: http://mbgoodman.tripod.com/fruitcakelinks.html

PS: No fruitcakes were harmed in the making of this post.




Additional comic:
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Very funny Ken/Kendra,

                       Thanks I needed that!!!!     I used to just send the fruitcakes along every year, never eating a bite from one.  A couple of years ago I had one in my trunk and forgot it was there. One day I had a flat and while lifting the great weight of the high density cake to retrieve the spare I had an idea!   Yep, now I use it for a spare when I have a flat, I find it much more substantial than the "doughnut" spare and can drive safely at any speed for any distance!


beth

I am not sure what all of this is about - who is  the :police: on this one (I needed to get the new icon a go) . I do not mind a bit of Fruitcate.


Alice

Ken/Kendra....tsk tsk tsk

What in the world are you thinking?  Here you are, a fine upstanding Androgyne, and you offer us a Binary view of fruitcake????  Just as I reject the binary gender worldview, so I reject the fruitcake choices.  

Personally, I'm going with "Standard Answer #1:  It Depends"

Not all fruitcakes are bad (just most of them).  I agree with Jillieann/JR's comments...the rum definitely makes all the difference.  I also like the lighter colored (and weighing) ones.  I'm just not a big fan of all the candied fruit...has a funny taste to me.

So, while there are a few Angels in the slice of Heavenly Fruitcake, most are Demon crumbs, scattered across the tablecloths of Christmas dinners everywhere.

Just my personal opinion.  If you happen to like fruitcake, God Bless you...you're gonna need it

.....Laurie

I'm Jewish!  I avoid this evil known as fruitcake!  :D

Never had it, but I don't think I would like it.  Therefore, spawn of hell.

Blueberry pie, on the other hand...

Quote...and on top of everything else, they are almost ten bucks!

 >:( You're not supposed to BUY fruitcake, you're supposed to bum it off someone who bakes it. The fake store fruitcake is there to divert people away from the hand made stuff....leaves more for me and my fat bottom. LOL.

ACCEPT THE CAKE. DO NOT JUDGE IT BY ITS FRUITINESS... OR WHETHER IS IS TOO HARD ...OR TOO SWEET....TO DARK OR TOO LIGHT.

Let the fruitcake just 'be'.

 :D

Rev. Chunk

Quote from: Tinkerbell on December 14, 2006, 09:18:29 PMOh...you bet! I agree!  I have been trying to get rid of this fruitcake for over five years now.. >:D, but somehow I keep on getting it back every Christmas.........this time, one of my "favorite" aunties will be the lucky one...>:D

Tinkerbell...you are an evil evil woman...and I love you for it!!  Favorite aunts are the perfect ones on which to dump the old fruitcake Christmas present bomb.  Problem is, they also tend to remember to send it back next year.  

I've decided to try an experiment this year...starting the fruitcake swap tradition with my family.  (Getting old means you get to do stuff like that.)  I'm gonna give a fruitcake to everyone and see how many I get back next year.  I'm not gonna tell them about the experiment until the end of January...were they brave and ate it, or just tossed it in the trash?  How many were actually twisted enough to keep it and send it back?  Inquiring minds want to know...

Who said you can't mess with people for Christmas?  I'm giving them the gift of entertainment, with a little dose of humility...how can that be bad?  The Spirit of Christmas is Giving...nobody said giving always had to be a good thing, did they?  >:D

Quote from: chunk on December 15, 2006, 01:20:04 AMACCEPT THE CAKE. DO NOT JUDGE IT BY ITS FRUITINESS... OR WHETHER IS IS TOO HARD ...OR TOO SWEET....TO DARK OR TOO LIGHT.

Let the fruitcake just 'be'.

 :D

Rev. Chunk

Amen, brother!  Accept the cake (and prepare to send it back next year!)  It doesn't matter if it is fruity or not, too hard, sweet, dark or light BECAUSE YOU AREN'T GOING TO EAT IT!!!

Let it be, let it be...whisper words of wisdom, let it be.  That means, "Step away from the Fruitcake", it is the Spawn of Satan and will cause your immortal soul to be condemned for all time to eating nothing but candied lemon rinds and funky tasting bread...beware!  ::) ::)

Wound half a turn too tight this evening.......Laurie


Modified:  OK, that was little over the top...for those of you who (sadly) believe that fruitcake is wonderful, please accept my appolgies (that you don't know better)...LOL

If anyone took any of this seriously, rewind and start over...life is too short to worry about the large outstanding problems of life (but there's always time for a long, protracted discussion over the most trivial matters)

......Laurie

Voting right now is exactly 50/50.

4 For
4 Against

Truely this incarnation has both a face of evil, and the purety of angelic delight. Such complex creation may have never been created since the beginning of time.

Not all fruitcakes are created equal.  What gives most fruitcake a bad name is the commercially made stuff that has citron as its main ingredient.  My wife makes fruitcakes every year for our family.  The recipe is called "Wexford Raisin Jewel Cake" and it calls for lots of raisins as well as candied fruit and nuts.  It must also be properly marinated in rum or whiskey.   ::)

Quote from: Louise on December 15, 2006, 05:59:05 PMNot all fruitcakes are created equal.  What gives most fruitcake a bad name is the commercially made stuff that has citron as its main ingredient.  My wife makes fruitcakes every year for our family.  The recipe is called "Wexford Raisin Jewel Cake" and it calls for lots of raisins as well as candied fruit and nuts.  It must also be properly marinated in rum or whiskey.   ::)

I'm assuming that the person baking this fruitcake should also be properly marinated? LOL. Could one use red wine for themselves and rum for the cake?

I've never made fruitcake. ----wait, a thought is forming....wait....sounds like....why not bake ......na, its gone. Had a thought but its gone.

Chunk

7 to 7  = tie still.

SAVE THE FRUITCAKE

Are you aware that each year literally thousands, if not millions, of innocent, helpless fruitcakes are slaughtered and chopped to pieces by intoxicated holiday revelers?  If this is not sad enough, the hapless fruitcakes are often placed into the drunken butchers' mouths and chewed.  While most are spat out because of their hideous taste (a natural defense mechanism) some are actually consumed!  This cannot stand!  Contact your state and local congressmen and political leaders demanding that they swiftly enact legislation to stop this vicious and perverse practice.  The fruitcakes are depending on you.

Oh well girl and boys i am not gonna stay silent on this one rest assured my little lips are moving here!!!!!!!!!!! :eusa_whistle:
First off many of my friends are fruitcakes.. Ha ha ha..... :icon_blah:
I could not resist!  
My old boss was a fruitcake!........ :icon_blah:  that was not hard at all...
But seriously folks.. Hmm sort of an irony huh in this first ever landmark fruitcke posting.  No polls please i beg... :icon_flower:
The only one i ever liked ever gave or ever counted is the one so laced and ladden with rum that you cannot taste anything esle in it! thus the fruit in cake and all along people thought it was the little bits of candied cherries and pineapples..
Tsk tsk.....
Fruit cake for all i say!  If the rum leaks out of the cake as it should then use the wrapping to start your fireplace with!
And to all a good night..............
Fruity kisses
Ricki

I agree with Ricki. Fruitcake requires large amounts of alcohol both in it and in the consumer. The best one I've ever had was so soaked in Jack Daniels that I didn't dare smoke near it.

In general, they are best used for hand to hand combat, not eating. I have been known to go on diets to avoid fruitcake. "gosh sorry, looks fabulous, but I'm on Atkins".

Dennis

Ahh Dennis that was great!  :icon_lalala:
It's nice to see some teasing and upbeat humor in an otherwise very confusing and topsy turvy world we live in!
xo
Ricki

Quote from: Tinkerbell on December 14, 2006, 09:18:29 PM
and on top of everything else, they are almost ten bucks!  no way....LOL ;D

Wow, ten bucks? I don't think I've ever eaten one that cost more than four. Maybe that's why I like fruitcake. I must be eating the el cheapo stuff. I guess just like modern art you have to pay big bucks to get something truly terrible.

Edit: Fixed quote - Melissa

Quote from: Casey on December 19, 2006, 01:40:00 PM
I guess just like modern art you have to pay big bucks to get something truly terrible.

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!

Sometimes there are definite advantages to not being "cultured".  I'm still looking for a picture of the dogs playing poker for my home-office wall...maybe the guest room depending on who the guest is...if they are "snooty", they get the picture...regular folks won't have to suffer.

Wonder if there is fruitcake along with the cards and poker chips on the dog's table???  It would explain a lot...

....Laurie

Quote from: LaurieO on December 19, 2006, 03:08:09 PM
Wonder if there is fruitcake along with the cards and poker chips on the dog's table???  It would explain a lot...

Maybe, but the artist probably grabbed it off the table to munch on while he painted, which would explain even more.

Melissa

Quote from: Kelly on December 19, 2006, 05:04:06 PM
I still haven't had any fruitcake, but I was thinking.......those ingredients never had a choice of whether or not they wanted to become a fruitcake, they were just made that way, and people just reject them and pass them on year after year.  All they ever wanted was to be eaten and enjoyed by people.   :'(

Kelly (Sympathy for the Fruitcakes)

I am in no way denying the ingredients, nor the whole fruitcake, it's God-given rights to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  Nor am I saying fruitcakes should be treated as the red-haired stepchildren of the food family.  They should be treated with the respect and admiration they so richly deserve.  Fruitcakes have a long history in our culture and are well known for their therapeutic properties...heck, just lifting one can be a cardiovascular workout requiring years of training.

Sadly, just as the rest of us don't always get what we want, the poor fruitcake's desire to be eaten is something I simply cannot help it reach.  I respect the fruitcake...heck, I even like it as a food item and a source of much jocularity...but, alas, I cannot eat it.  I have tried in the past to help the fruitcake achieve its goal of providing sustenance and tastebud entertainment.  I mean I really tried, but there is a weakness within me, a failing of perfect harmony if you will, that prevents me from fulfilling that goal.

I'm sorry, noble fruitcake, but perhaps one of my brothers and sisters and in-between-ers here at Susan's can bring about the exalted and righteous partaking of you that is so richly deserved.

Fruited be...

.....Laurie

Once again ...tied 10 vs 10

First off how much is a bucket in us dollars..
Second off i would guess cheap fruitcakes have less or no booze in them better ones have rum, the best would be 151 to just burn your tastebuds off before the nasty cake part hits them....
hehe..
actually i got one last year from the bread company.. Agghhhh
My mom loved it i thought she was nuts! hehe... :eusa_think:
think of the muscles the fedex and delivery guys build up just heaving those awful heavy things!
10-10 what a shame, where is the love!
Ricki

i
like
fruit
cake

I'm not a fan of fruitcake, however I did once eat one that was actually good.

zythyra

.... Of all -dead- posts... Pica decides to bump one related to fruit cake...
... You must really love fruit cake..  ;D

*Doesn't like sweets* Thus; let it burn.

WoW HOO i made it a draw at the moment, come on fruit cake, i do the very english thing of having a slice of cheese preferably wensledale al la wallice and grommit with mine, cracking cheese gromit

worth resurrecting, it's an important and popular debate.

I shouldn't have voted. I ruined an even count.

I just think fruit cake would be better if the cake was removed and replaced by chocolate.

QuoteI just think fruit cake would be better if the cake was removed and replaced by chocolate.

And even better still if we also removed the fruit, thus leaving only chocolate  ;D ::)

zythyra

Quote from: Pica Pica on July 16, 2007, 04:12:30 PM
worth resurrecting, it's an important and popular debate.

"Ahh...Ahhh...Ahhh...Bussshtt!" Laurry said trying to hide it behind a sneeze.

Popular debate I'll grant, but important?  Not nearly as important as the "Are you scatterbrained" debate.  Still, the fruitcake discussion continues once again...sigh

After giving it a considerable amount of thought, (well, most of the time was spent on whether or not to, once again, engage in this conversation), I find my biggest objection to fruitcake is the nasty extremely bitter tasting candied fruit used in the cakes in the US.  The cake itself isn't that bad, and I like dried fruits, but however they make the candied fruit, causes it to be very bitter.  Even with all that, it is hard to turn down cake that has been soaking in rum for a year.  Hopefully, the alcohol will kill most of my tastebuds before they have to deal with the nasty-tasting fruit. 

....Laurry

I'm for it. I like lots of things now that I dislike as a kid. Fruitcake, mustard, broccoli, sauerkraut, men.

Quote from: Candi Nahasapeemapetilon on July 16, 2007, 08:54:33 PM
I'm for it. I like lots of things now that I dislike as a kid. Fruitcake, mustard, broccoli, sauerkraut, men.

men with sauerkraut on their broccoli.   :D

Quote from: Tink on December 15, 2006, 01:58:11 AM

Quote from: LaurieOTinkerbell...you are an evil evil woman...

I've heard this not too long ago.... ;D ;)  Thank you for the compliment, Laurie.  It's great to know that I am loved! :D

Quote from: Ken/Kendra on December 14, 2006, 06:01:19 PM
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwhatscookingamerica.net%2FQ-A%2FFruitcake.jpg&hash=2f05bb87945a1e2d7eb8067f94ce7abc82ef4e17)

Okay I don't know about you kitties, but I've never, ever seen a fruitcake like the one above....where can I get a fruitcake that looks exactly like that?  in Utopia?

tinkerbell :icon_chick:

My mother and stepgrandmother make fruitcakes like that.  We eat 2-3 of them every holiday season.  Mum makes a dark one and a light one and my stepgrandma makes her top secret one.  They're usually all gone by the end of January.

Thanks for reminding me of that one, Tink.  It does look pretty tasty.

......Laurry

P.S.  Great...now I'm wanting something sweet...Thanks again, Tink!

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bl38Usa4Ig
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9knoLOVYLGg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HwshpqU5guY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M1OkFZZAsJc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EQfWWWTE8K4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsQNwr3tnqU

Quote from: Rebis on July 16, 2007, 09:45:39 PM

Quote from: Candi Nahasapeemapetilon on July 16, 2007, 08:54:33 PM
I'm for it. I like lots of things now that I dislike as a kid. Fruitcake, mustard, broccoli, sauerkraut, men.

men with sauerkraut on their broccoli.   :D

i spat me cream out at that, very funny. as for kens video bonanza (???blimey???)

It depends entirely on the fruitcake, really. One made with actual dried fruit instead of the glicee' sort, and without gallons of alum, but with pints of booze, is quite good.

Fruitcake is absolutely horrible.

Oooooh no it's not

Quote from: Doc on July 17, 2007, 02:24:17 PM
It depends entirely on the fruitcake, really. One made with actual dried fruit instead of the glicee' sort, and without gallons of alum, but with pints of booze, is quite good.

So are you saying that on the Fruitcake spectrum between really awful (glicee' [whatever that is] and alum) and quite good (actual dried fruit and booze) that, like us androgynes, most fruitcakes fall somewhere in the middle?

And, please note that I did not call androgynes fruitcakes, but I am sure there are a few (with or without nuts) for which it may apply.

.....Laurry

Actually, most fruitcakes fall on the awful end of the spectrum, as they are mass produced and sold in ugly tins with pictures of cartoon santas and teddy bears and cardinal-birds wearing scarves and such on them, and given to you by people whose level of taste is right along with that.

Glicee' (I am probably spelling it wrong) fruit are those candied ones that appear to be made out of transparent rubber and taste more or less like they are. They are mysteriously bright red and green and bear no resemblence to actual fruit.

I've been known to make fruitcake. Two sorts, even, a white one and a black one. But I get real dried fruit for them. They good, though quite hard and heavy. They are even better several months later, especially if I have remembered to take them out from time to time and inject more rum into them. Lately I've forgotten. My phase of wanting to inject booze into food with syringes seems to have passed. By the way, if you are on injectable hormones you might want to re-use your syringes to inject rum into peaches.

rum peaches? sounds good. I got some nectarines and a bit of Captain Morgan somewhere

Have you got a syringe and a needle? Inject small boluses of rum into several sites inside the peach. You don't want a huge pocket of the stuff. It does help to put the peach away for a while after you've given it its medicine, so that the rum can get distributed about a little inside, but you will want to eat it the same day.

i've got everything in need except a syringe
oh well, its in my head now and it's not coming out

Is it decided yet?

50/50.

I suspect fruitcake is the reason for the decline of family values. This could be a good or bad thing don't you think?

I blame fruitcake for the fall of Rome.  Either they had it, and that caused it, or they didn't and that brought the empire down.

can't argue against that one

iron clad that is

Pure Evil.
Cake and fruit should never mix.
Pie and fruit, different story.

Quote from: Vexing on January 04, 2009, 06:38:13 PM
Pie and fruit, different story.

:icon_blah:

I don't get how you can be as nutty as a fruitcake yet I have made lots of fruitcake without nuts. So your saying I'm not crazy?

today i cooked a pie with fruit and meat together

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:42:50 PM
today i cooked a pie with fruit and meat together

So you took a pie, some meat and some fruit, bunged them together and cooked it? That sounds terrible.

Anyone ever made a tomato pie? I have a feeling it would be really good.

Quote from: Nicky on January 04, 2009, 06:41:14 PM

Quote from: Vexing on January 04, 2009, 06:38:13 PM
Pie and fruit, different story.

:icon_blah:

I don't get how you can be as nutty as a fruitcake yet I have made lots of fruitcake without nuts. So your saying I'm not crazy?

I also do not get the Nutty Fruitcake thing.
Or is it because everything these days contains traces of nuts?

it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

Quote from: Vexing on January 04, 2009, 06:45:25 PM
I also do not get the Nutty Fruitcake thing.
Or is it because everything these days contains traces of nuts?

I think it is to do with fruit cake looking like it has already been digested, and after seeing Austin Powers I now know that poo tastes kind of nutty so putting one and one together the phrase basically is likening you to a ->-bleeped-<-. Pleasant.


Your pie sounds grand pica. Sounds like deconstructed deviled sausages in a pie. I was thinking along the lines of Tamarillo and chicken. Would be a pretty color but probably not taste the best. Made a Tamarillo pizza once and it looked like an open wound. Would have made a good desert pizza but I had not added any sugar or custard or similar  :(

LOL, this thread has resurrected from the dead...

Fruitcake, The Sequel coming soon to a theater or theatre near you.

I'm still against it ;D

Z

seriously a thickened tomato pie where you bite into it and drink out the insides like tomato soup, that would be great!

I'm not a big fruitcake fan but I'll eat it if it is there. I like it best when it has plenty of sherry on it. I'm not a big fan of marzipan icing, my mum makes wedding cakes and I had my fill of the stuff growing up. Plus after working with cyanide in pest control the almondy marzipan reminds me of it's smell and kind of puts me off.

aparantly some people can't smell cyanide - some sort of gene thing like tongue rolling.

Ah. Almondy smell.
I think you hit the nail on the proverbial.
Almonds are nuts. Icing on fruitcakes. Nutty fruitcake.

Holy smokes Batgirl! I think you've got it.

Almondy smell.

Interestingly enough, cyanide has a faint almond smell, on the bitter side, but almond just the same (don't ask how I know) so I'm thinking now that people who give you fruitcakes are trying to kill you.

C4, an explosive, also has a distinct almond smell.

Quote from: tekla on January 04, 2009, 08:43:43 PM
Almondy smell.

Interestingly enough, cyanide has a faint almond smell, on the bitter side, but almond just the same (don't ask how I know) so I'm thinking now that people who give you fruitcakes are trying to kill you.

Some people can't smell it. It has a nastyness to it, can't really describe it. It is a bit almondy but you feel it way back in your nose. You don't want to smell too much of it as it can kill you just from the smell - stops your blood binding oxygen If I remember rightly, so you kind of suffocate.

Hey honey, drink this, it's good for you.

i made day of the dead candy skulls with almond paste in high school...they were very ew. 

on a side note, I enjoy fruity cake, fruity pie, and well, fruity anything really.  :D  Probably why I like you guys so much!  HAH!  >:-)

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:46:14 PM
it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

this is why you people couldn't even hang on to India.

Quote from: Rebis on January 05, 2009, 07:58:17 PM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:46:14 PM
it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

this is why you people couldn't even hang on to India.

haha good one reebs!

Quote from: Vexing on January 04, 2009, 08:48:59 PM
C4, an explosive, also has a distinct almond smell.

It's very good to know that you know this.  >:-)

Mina.

Quote from: Rebis on January 05, 2009, 07:58:17 PM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:46:14 PM
it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

this is why you people couldn't even hang on to India.

Yeah, but they had a man....in a loincoth...who sat down...you can't defeat a man in a loincloth who sits down.

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 06, 2009, 02:11:57 AM

Quote from: Rebis on January 05, 2009, 07:58:17 PM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:46:14 PM
it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

this is why you people couldn't even hang on to India.

Yeah, but they had a man....in a loincoth...who sat down...you can't defeat a man in a loincloth who sits down.

LOL.  :D

Mina.

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 06, 2009, 02:11:57 AM

Quote from: Rebis on January 05, 2009, 07:58:17 PM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 04, 2009, 06:46:14 PM
it does, but it was very good - i used pork and apple and some onions..and then a bit of wholegrain mustars, creme fraiche and an egg whipped together as a top instead of pastry. Was quite scrumptious actually...but i like fruity meat.

this is why you people couldn't even hang on to India.

Yeah, but they had a man....in a loincoth...who sat down...you can't defeat a man in a loincloth who sits down.

Wow.  Nice.  I enjoyed that.  :P

Well its easy to stop people who are doing something, protesting, marching, rioting, its almost impossible to stop people who are doing nothing.

which is why 90% of my time is spent doing nothing.

Quote from: Rebis on January 06, 2009, 07:20:38 PM

which is why 90% of my time is spent doing nothing.

It only works if you wear the loincloth around our waist and groin area Rebis.

Quote from: Nicky on January 06, 2009, 07:24:47 PM

Quote from: Rebis on January 06, 2009, 07:20:38 PM

which is why 90% of my time is spent doing nothing.

It only works if you wear the loincloth around our waist and groin area Rebis.

OUR waist and groin?  Are you planning on something I should know about?

Damn it, I dropped the Y. Thats how Y fronts were invented by putting the Y back into our loincloth.

I can live with a Y in my loincloth.  In fact, I might prefer it to what is in my pants right now.    :o

Quote from: Rebis on January 06, 2009, 07:32:35 PM

I can live with a Y in my loincloth.  In fact, I might prefer it to what is in my pants right now.    :o

Just tell her to get out  ;)

I got an idea for underwear that prevents molestation while sitting on a train or a bus.  It's pretty simple. I'm going to create under that has fish hooks all over it. Then when a person uninvited tries something, they'll learn a good lesson.

I'll need some volunteers to model it for our customers.

Gonna make it kinda hard to sit down, don't 'cha think?

but great for fishing. especially the coat yerself in bacon and sit in the river style of fishing

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Bacon.

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 07, 2009, 12:52:50 PM
but great for fishing. especially the coat yerself in bacon and sit in the river style of fishing

you're already coated in bacon, so all you need is step 2. sit in the river and let them gnaw at you. ;)
boy, this thread is making me hungry.

The solution is obvious.  Bacon Fruitcake.

Not sure if I really want to rub that on my shoes  :-\

you kiddin'? love teh frootkaik! go frootkaik!

OK, everyone send their unused fruitcakes to SoldierJane.

Quote from: tekla on January 07, 2009, 12:50:08 PM
Gonna make it kinda hard to sit down, don't 'cha think?

Maybe. But I can't admit it because I don't want to blow any sales.

Quote from: Nero on January 07, 2009, 12:55:06 PM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 07, 2009, 12:52:50 PM
but great for fishing. especially the coat yerself in bacon and sit in the river style of fishing

you're already coated in bacon, so all you need is step 2. sit in the river and let them gnaw at you. ;)
boy, this thread is making me hungry.

That's because you're favorite food is bacon.  Didn't you tell us once that you eat tons of it?

Quote from: tekla on January 07, 2009, 12:57:31 PM
The solution is obvious.  Bacon Fruitcake.

Bacon Fruitcake?  That sounds terribly English.  What say you, Pica Pica?  Between the tripe and the mincemeat, wouldn't bacon fruitcake fit in fine?

Quote from: tekla on January 07, 2009, 12:57:31 PM
The solution is obvious.  Bacon Fruitcake.

or maybe a fruit baconcake.

although I cannot picture bacon fruitcake, I can imagine a steamed bacon and fruit pudding. In a posh shop in london they sell bacon chocolate.

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 09, 2009, 05:21:55 PM
although I cannot picture bacon fruitcake, I can imagine a steamed bacon and fruit pudding. In a posh shop in london they sell bacon chocolate.

Mmmmm, bacon chocolate.  Somehow, I'm not surprised.  My grandmother is from UK, so I was exposed to some of the fun things english.  Mincemeat is actually a favorite of mine, and I love english tea-- especially Earl Grey.  My mom collects tea pots, and I have dibs when she passes.
But I had never heard of bacon chocolate. :-\

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 09, 2009, 05:21:55 PM
although I cannot picture bacon fruitcake, I can imagine a steamed bacon and fruit pudding. In a posh shop in london they sell bacon chocolate.

I swear to God I am going to report you to the World Health Organization.

From the nation that gave us ell pie.

Quote from: Rebis on January 10, 2009, 11:27:01 AM

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 09, 2009, 05:21:55 PM
although I cannot picture bacon fruitcake, I can imagine a steamed bacon and fruit pudding. In a posh shop in london they sell bacon chocolate.

I swear to God I am going to report you to the World Health Organization.

It ain't kosher either, so I'll report hir to the Rabbinical authorities.

Z

Good idea. Something must be done!

Maybe Isreal will turn their attention to Pica.

And risk a Pica Pica infatata infatata?

or, even worse, a Pica Pica bacon/apple fruit cake

If Pica Pica was making it wouldn't it be a bacon bacon cake?

Bacon, is there anything it can't do?

I don't think you want to bring bacon in any form to Israel.

Z

Awe hell, Israel is the BEST place to eat bacon, no one else wants any of it.

Quote from: Zythyra on January 10, 2009, 06:13:25 PM
I don't think you want to bring bacon in any form to Israel.

Z

:D

Quote from: tekla on January 10, 2009, 05:39:56 PM
If Pica Pica was making it wouldn't it be a bacon bacon cake?

Bacon, is there anything it can't do?

i have made steamed bacon pudding, should i be expecting people in black to bundle me off soon, Or just be air-struck?

Funny, when I was in Israel I got bacon, in an omelette with cheese to boot.  The religion forbids them from eating it, not from serving it.

Fruitcakes make great catapult fodder. The less folks that eat bacon, the more for me. :laugh: Mmmmmm bacon. ::) Ba'con, chomp chomp. I loves bacon. Now I just have to figure how to make folks stop eating other food I like.  >:-)

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 11, 2009, 01:23:26 AM

Quote from: tekla on January 10, 2009, 05:39:56 PM
If Pica Pica was making it wouldn't it be a bacon bacon cake?

Bacon, is there anything it can't do?

i have made steamed bacon pudding, should i be expecting people in black to bundle me off soon, Or just be air-struck?

People in black loincloths.

Fruitcakes make great catapult fodder

Wow, I never thought of that, we build a little Trebuchet at work once and it was launching water balloons a solid block or so until the police told us it wasn't the best idea they came across that day.

i love a good trebuchet... the tower built one, but never fired it.

Quote from: Pica Pica on January 11, 2009, 03:17:15 PM
i love a good trebuchet... the tower built one, but never fired it.

I wonder how well an androgyne would work as trebuchet ammunition?

I think fruitcake is heavenly

I am fruitcake, hear me roar...

Quote from: KYLYKaHYT on August 29, 2009, 07:17:41 AM
I am fruitcake, hear me roar...

haha!

Again, another old discussion that was never fully finished.

Again, another old discussion that was never fully finished.

Not finishing it goes with the subject, fruitcakes are never fully finished either.

I read this about fruitcake storage. Interesting.

"after being slowly baked, the finished fruitcakes get their preservative treatment. Cheesecloth is soaked in brandy, bourbon, whiskey, rum or other liquor and then wrapped around the cooled fruitcake. The whole shebang is then wrapped in foil to ripen and age.

Fruitcakes soaked in liquor can literally last for years if you periodically add more liquor. Some fruitcake fans won't even touch a fruitcake until it has aged at least three years, although it's generally recommended that soaked fruitcakes be consumed within two years. Fruitcake should be tightly wrapped and stored in the refrigerator. Unwrap every few months and drizzle with liquor. Re-wrap tightly."

I wonder who originally thought of pickling a fruitcake in booze for storage?

Quote from: riven_one on September 02, 2009, 01:40:49 PM
Fruitcakes soaked in liquor can literally last for years if you periodically add more liquor. Some fruitcake fans won't even touch a fruitcake until it has aged at least three years, although it's generally recommended that soaked fruitcakes be consumed within two years.

Yeah, and if you plan to store your fruitcake for more than two or three years, you can simply substitute formaldehyde - or embalming fluid - for the booze.  :laugh:

Fruitcakes soaked in liquor can literally last for years if you periodically add more liquor

Makes some sense, it sure worked for Uncle Frank.

Quote from: tekla on September 03, 2009, 03:36:25 PM
Fruitcakes soaked in liquor can literally last for years if you periodically add more liquor

Makes some sense, it sure worked for Uncle Frank.

and the queen mum

Her too.

Would eating some really old, liquored up fruit cake kill illness?  'Cause this one time when I was sick, I got REALLY, REALLY drunk and felt fantastic the next day...

Virginia contemplates keeping the fruitcakes she gets at Christmas and buying a large bottle of Jack  :icon_suspicious: :icon_chew: :icon_drunk:

Quote from: Virginia Marie on September 04, 2009, 11:52:25 PM
Virginia contemplates keeping the fruitcakes she gets at Christmas and buying a large bottle of Jack  :icon_suspicious: :icon_chew: :icon_drunk:

Seems that you could squeeze a fair amount of jack out of the fruitcakes that you get from christmas  :D

Had a very nice rum cake over christmas, but also a horrible bricklike fruitcake

Thank you all for 15 minutes of solid laughter!

(ps I do not believe fruitcake is food - except maybe at Susan's place its food for laughter)

Didn't read all the replies, so apologies if this has been posted before.

http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html (http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html)

There's a fruitcake at the end that stops a bullet.

Quote from: SilverFang on January 27, 2010, 06:20:55 AM
Didn't read all the replies, so apologies if this has been posted before.

http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html (http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html)

There's a fruitcake at the end that stops a bullet.

ROFLMAO ......That was great!!!  :laugh:

Quote from: SilverFang on January 27, 2010, 06:20:55 AM
Didn't read all the replies, so apologies if this has been posted before.

http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html (http://www.zug.com/live/83255/Can-a-Fruitcake-Stop-a-Bullet.html)

There's a fruitcake at the end that stops a bullet.

there we go, vote for fruitcake - it could save your life

I can only add that anything that has "Hostess" written on it can not be considered a positive example of the fruitcake universe.

Try a Claxton Fruit Cake (http://www.claxtonfruitcake.com/index.php).

The "Two Fat Ladies",  on the UK cooking show said one should never let an American near a pumpkin, it appears that this axiom must now be broadened to include that masterpiece of the culinary arts, the Fruit Cake.

How anyone can possibly produce one which does not cause one's tastebuds to leap in orgasmic delight is a mystery to me.  Even the humble Lions Club Christmas Cake, once released from it's metallic prison,  is a joy to behold as it presents itself to one, in all it's sultana-laden glory, redolent with the aroma of a fine Scotch whisky.

Truly, you are among the deprived of the world if you are bereft of the this veritable King of Cakes.

2nd time I have read all the posts in this.....and LMAO, again. Classic.  :laugh:

I can't even eat the damned stuff. So I have to go with, "BURN IT! HERESY, THY NAME IS FRUITCAKE."

Since I'm a vegan, I would have to make my own fruitcake-nonvegans seem baffled by the arcane arts of making vegan pastry...oh, and I have to find no-food-coloring dried fruits to put in it...

Given that, I have yet to meet a simple sugar or carb I didn't like.  In fact there's only a rare few that I *can* actually have in the house without eating the ENTIRE THING. Be it the whole bag of cookies, the whole cake, whatever.  My wife made cookies and I had to ask her to put a padlock on the jar.  And they weren't even that good.

I have a chronic binge-eating problem,which is currently under control, but...Single-serving bags are my friends.  I DON'T think I could be safely left unattended with a properly-made fruitcake.  It would be like leaving a bag of coke around a reformed tweaker.

(All your fruitcakes are belong to us now...Make your time now...)

no in-between? and on an androgyny board D:

haha, JK  ;) fruitcake is delicious

Was this thread about eating fruitcakes, or doing something else to/with them?

Hey,
Just wanted to offer my fruitcake-eating services to any of you who would hate to see a gift go to waste.
Man...now I'm hungry....

Quote from: Rebis on October 28, 2010, 10:31:26 PM
Was this thread about eating fruitcakes, or doing something else to/with them?

Yes.

Hey, now, I'm married >:-) behave

I poured all that booze into the fruitcake but still didn't get anywhere with it.

Quote from: Rebis on November 01, 2010, 10:20:38 PM
I poured all that booze into the fruitcake but still didn't get anywhere with it.

That's a tough fruit cake!  Try sheep puns!  They're baaaaaaad.  :icon_eyebrow:

Fruitcake one of the foulest cakes on earth in my opinion, everytime I attempt to eat one I would nearly blow chunks, it just taste aweful to me. One time I cheated and stole all the m&ms or whatever the chocolatte was from it and happily ate that.

LET THEM EAT CAKE!!!

This should be required reading, from the beginning, for anyone who questions silliness here.

I love fruitcake.

I know for a fact that there is no one true fruitcake as every fruitcake that has crossed my path has been promptly devoured.

Lightly toasted with an overly generous slathering of salt free butter....heaven.

Oh that's not what you meant...?

:P

I spose, like a good play, this was due a revival.

I spose, like a good play, this was due a revival.

Only if we can get the understudy Black Forrest Cake to take over the lead role.

ha ha! i've never even seen a fruitcake in my life, but after having been fed amounts of silliness, i'm now a firm believer that fruitcake will, one way or the other, show you heaven

Flan 9 From Outer Space...

Quote from: Padma on June 14, 2011, 12:54:34 PM
Flan 9 From Outer Space...

I just watched the first hour of that movie just the other day. Couldn't find it in me to finish the flick.

Now that I think of it, it's true that I've never actually seen anyone eating fruitcake. I've seen people claim to eat it, I've seen fruitcake with pieces cut out, but I've never seen it being eaten.

Fruitcake is one of my favorite food groups!  The best is when my mother makes it and soaks it in brandy for several months.  ;D

Drink the brandy, toss the cake.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.justsaypictures.com%2Fimagesthumb%2Fthe-cake-is-a-lie.jpg&hash=0314735447187171f1e2fe52c86f30cc082748fc)

Hmm...

I genuinely can't believe that no one in this thread has even considered the possibility that:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages.icanhascheezburger.com%2Fcompletestore%2F2008%2F12%2F5%2F128729983494342116.jpg&hash=6bcc800f0e4087a5faf54ef4a99a7414dadd229e)

The cake is an ally :).

ally.. as in partner in crime?

 8)

A poem about brandy in not quite the style of Ogden Nash.

Of Brandy
I am not a fandy
But of rum
I can gollop quite a lot and it makes me feel very happy and warm inside but them churns up and ejects through my mouth and out my tum.

I was afraid of where that was going to end... :)

You mean like the one about the Man from Nantucket.?  Though the Irish priest from New Delhi is pretty good too.

Quote from: tekla on June 14, 2011, 03:23:14 PM
You mean like the one about the Man from Nantucket.?  Though the Irish priest from New Delhi is pretty good too.

Maybe we can start a limerick and everyone add a line? I'll start.

There was once a man from nantucket.....

Who liked to eat cake from a bucket...

But the cake was so dense

it stuck to the fence

And no one can come and unstuck-it.

Really Picax2?  That's NOT how you end a limerick.   

Quote from: tekla on June 15, 2011, 10:06:13 AM
Really Picax2?  That's NOT how you end a limerick.   

True, but in Pica-squared's defense they were limited by the rules of the forum

Wanna give it another try there, Pica?  This time with the tangential wit we've all come to expect?

Nah - go unstuck yerselves (grumble, grumble).

a slight variation on this topic...

Fruitcakes: For or Against Androgynes ;D

Would it be Androgyns in general or just the Androgyns ;D?

Either way I guess I would have to say 'for', but, then that is admitting that indeed I am a fruitcake.
I'm not sure if I should share that kind of volatile information.

Fruits of the forest :).

Spawn of hell! I find the little fruits inside too bitter.

Quote from: Zythyra on June 15, 2011, 01:00:10 PM
a slight variation on this topic...

Fruitcakes: For or Against Androgynes ;D

I feel like this depends entirely on their desire to be eaten.  Or their propensity for hurt feelings (see poll at the top).

I tried papaya once and didn't like it but I love the dried papaya and pineapple and mangos. 

Best thing about mangos is mango butter.  Spread it all over your lover for a tropical sensation.

Whoa!!  What a great idea now all I need is a lover

Quote from: Laurry on December 14, 2006, 08:36:38 PM
Ken/Kendra....tsk tsk tsk

What in the world are you thinking?  Here you are, a fine upstanding Androgyne, and you offer us a Binary view of fruitcake????  Just as I reject the binary gender worldview, so I reject the fruitcake choices. 

Personally, I'm going with "Standard Answer #1:  It Depends"

Not all fruitcakes are bad (just most of them).  I agree with Jillieann/JR's comments...the rum definitely makes all the difference.  I also like the lighter colored (and weighing) ones.  I'm just not a big fan of all the candied fruit...has a funny taste to me.

So, while there are a few Angels in the slice of Heavenly Fruitcake, most are Demon crumbs, scattered across the tablecloths of Christmas dinners everywhere.

Just my personal opinion.  If you happen to like fruitcake, God Bless you...you're gonna need it

.....Laurie

I vote for BREAD PUDDING!   >:-)

Now there's a flash from the past...

It actually makes sense...I must have been high when I wrote it

.....LD

P.S.  I still reject the binary choice option

I'm against fruitcake but my opinion doesn't count since I'm not andro.  :)

Of course your opinion counts.  Why would you ever think otherwise?  I mean, just because we're going to ignore it... :o

my opinion doesn't count

just because we're going to ignore it...

Right, and all are welcome here, we ignore everyone.  It's equal.  All is one and one is all.  It's pretty much where common sense comes to die.

It's pretty much where common binary sense comes to die...

common binary sense comes to die

that's because we can count to more than two.

Quote from: tekla on February 23, 1974, 01:00:30 AM
that's because we can count to more than two.

We understand the importance of three and more, and also are able to acknowlegde the infinitey between zero and the quantitiy of two.
For all you simple minded and geeky people out there, there is more to life and life is not just on or off.
There is a majority of maybe in the universe. IMO (on-maybe-off).

For some reason, I'm unable to resist typing: Two's company, three's a cloud. Probability-wise, that is...

Still against fruitcake, other than its use in war as a weapon of mass destruction.
CIA reports that the middle east is far behind in stockpiling them.
Especially as western countries do by placing them in civilian homes until the Great Exchange that takes place near the winter solstice.

Fruitcake is a waste of space that could be filled with christmas pudding 8). That's a weapon of mass distraction. Or possibly just a weapon of mass.

A weapon of messy distraction.

I was just recognizing the joke and trying to get in on it.   :-\

No joke here.

The fruitcake is the androgyne, the androgyne is the fruitcake. It's a metaphor really.

Cake my hand - I'm a stranger in paradise.

Was listening to that song today.

I prefer the original Borodin, but while there are princes in it, there's no cake.

Quote from: Pica Pica on June 17, 2011, 02:09:04 PM
The fruitcake is the androgyne, the androgyne is the fruitcake. It's a metaphor really.

the androfruit is the gynecake, or is it, the androcake is the fruitgyne?  ;D

QuoteFor ...taste of Heaven 36 (46.2%)
Against...spawn of Hell 42 (53.8%)

[Announcer's Voice]
Will "for" fruitcake recover and tie it up, or will "against" fruitcake settle the matter once and for all.... stay tuned!

...and Fruitcake's coach brings on Hash in the last quarter... this could really turn things around...

Quote from: espo on June 16, 2011, 01:06:16 PM
Whoa!!  What a great idea now all I need is a lover

Me!! Oooh! Me!! Pick me!! Me!!!!!!! Meeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm feeling true to form, a little omg panting  >:-) and a little really? blushing   

And yes I'm being gender sexist because I'm sure girls pant too ESPECIALLY at such an offer.

Quote from: espo on June 21, 2011, 03:35:29 PM
I'm feeling true to form, a little omg panting  >:-) and a little really? blushing   

And yes I'm being gender sexist because I'm sure girls pant too ESPECIALLY at such an offer.

I'm gonna get you one day

The make or break question I ask all my potential lovers ( haha I wish ) is when do you most enjoy your Cornflakes ? Breakfast or midnight snack.

LOL  we are doing the freak'n thread drift thing again.

I open the Cornflake question to everyone ..... no strings attached :p.

Elevenses

I am Winnie the Pooh sometimes.

I wish everyone who hated fruitcake would send them to me  ;)

i wouldn't have to buy food for eons  :)

oh they do last forever too  ::)

You could also build a very large permanent structure for the benefit of all mankind.

Quote from: espo on June 22, 2011, 12:57:39 PM
The make or break question I ask all my potential lovers ( haha I wish ) is when do you most enjoy your Cornflakes ? Breakfast or midnight snack.

My answer is  "I'll enjoy YOUR cornflakes all night long..." with a really cheesy wink at the end.

Does fruitcake always get you into these moods or is it????

Quote from: Stratovan on June 23, 2011, 12:28:01 AM
Does fruitcake always get you into these moods or is it????

If you were referring to Espo as "fruitcake" when you said that then yes, fruitcake always does it to me

I've skimmed the thread, it looks like we're going to milk this cornflakes thing for a bit  :D

cornflakes again? i love them with milk or kefir, but i wonder how they'd taste with fruitcake

Does Tony the Tiger fit into this somewhere?

Quote from: Zythyra on June 26, 2011, 10:01:34 AM
I've skimmed the thread, it looks like we're going to milk this cornflakes thing for a bit  :D

That was udderly terrible, Z.  :-*

Your's wasn't mooch better...

Half fat, half wit, we are not amuelsied.

:)

Those puns are so quick they go past-yer-eyes.

It's a veritable cattlecart galactica of dairysion. [stop that... okay...]

*Intruding*

Am I the only one in the world who actually thinks fruit cake is really good-tasting and a great idea for a gift?

Could be the worst of the best or the other way around.

"A sharp bolt of hunger hit Luther hard.
His knees almost buckled, his poker face almost grimaced.
For two weeks now his sense of smell had been much keener, no doubt a side effect of a strict diet.
Maybe he got a whiff of Mabel's finest, he wasn't sure, but a craving came over him. Suddenly, he had to have something to eat.
Suddenly, he wanted to snatch the bag from Kendall, rip open a package, and start gnawing on a fruitcake."
— John Grisham

I sort of like fruitcake, I just think it's like a very low-res version of xmas pudding - which has more fruit and less flour in it, and is just a superior comestible (that's magic).

Those puns were beautiful.  Brought a tear to my eye... :icon_weee:

I'm pretty sure I remember my grandmother making a fruitcake once and I'm pretty sure I liked it.  But that was a long time ago.

Quote from: A on June 29, 2011, 11:05:39 PM
*Intruding*

Am I the only one in the world who actually thinks fruit cake is really good-tasting and a great idea for a gift?

Noooo - I like fruitcake. Almost as good as chocolate or ginger... ^_^

Candied ginger ?  That's definitely an acquired taste.

Stem ginger in honey - food of the gods (it's hard to find, it's usually stuck in sugar syrup instead).

pickled ginger is yummy. can't eat sushi without those and wasabi, but i can eat pickled ginger without sushi any day

Ginger?  meh, I take Mary Ann first.

I was referring to ginger cake actually, but candied ginger is nice too - helps with travel sickness as well.

definitely Mary Ann over Ginger....

I prefer Mary Jane.
With or without guys in spandex.
And I didn't like the movies either.

I also didn't read the thread, but I just assumed it was in mid drift.

Quote from: ZaidaZadkiel on July 05, 2011, 01:11:03 AM
I also didn't read the thread, but I just assumed it was in mid drift.

hahaha!  We always seem to be.  :p


Speaking of gingers, I saw a show about a ginger ghost and I was thinking that all ghosts should be gingers.  It just feels right.

At first, I was like, yes!  Ginger Ghost Hunters!  But then I realized that sounds like the living ones are ginger.  Not that I'd mind that either.

Ginger hunters of Ginger ghosts.

ginger ghosts hunting gingers or gingers hunting ginger ghosts?

or ginger ale?

I still want maryjane

Fruitcake.  ::takes deep breath::

Okay.  I used to believe that fruitcake was not actually food, but the rejects from a brick factory.  I considered it a Christmas tradition right up there with that hideous Paul McCartney song, you know the one I mean.  It was, perhaps, the inspiration for a certain dessert-related meme from a recent videogame involving portals.

And then, my roommate made fruitcake.  I was skeptical at first.  The ingredients were rum, fruit, awesomeness, rum, and... I think there may have been some rum in it too.

I have seen the light.  Fruitcake is an incredible transcendent experience.  Also, rum!

That stuff in cardboard boxes that people give as gifts?  Make no attempt to eat it.  It is not cake.  It's 150 years old.  It contains no rum.  Politely accept the gift, and if you don't need to build a levee or something in the next year, dust it off, put a fresh tag on it, and return it to the person.

In conclusion, rum.

so in conclusion, it was your rum-mate's fruitcake.

Rum for yer life.

i talking to himself in a singing manner as he walks and occasionally loses his balance:
"rum-buddy-rum-de-rum-de-rum...rum-buddy-rum-rum-rum-rum......"

rum.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.lighteningonline.com%2Fwp-content%2Fblowing-out-the-candles-on-the-pirate-cake.thumbnail.JPG&hash=01270ecdb19601c7a9184fc778b8ee009d2cf5f6)

Forget rum-cake, THIS is a cake for pirates.

Right newbies, time to ask the andros that most important of questions; Fruitcake, for or against?

Quote from: Pica Pica on May 19, 2012, 03:57:26 AM
Right newbies, time to ask the andros that most important of questions; Fruitcake, for or against?

Don't know if I'd consider myself against fruitcake.

I mean if you want to get your jollies from bungee jumping, watching Tim Burton movies, wine tasting, eating fruitcake, or some other activities whose appeal is beyond me, well go ahead. It's a free country.

i'm a free cake-lover, but i can't say for sure that i'd love fruitcake

still, from what i've heard told about it, i believe that it would let you have a taste of heaven one way or the other

Quote from: espo on June 22, 2011, 12:57:39 PM
The make or break question I ask all my potential lovers ( haha I wish ) is when do you most enjoy your Cornflakes ? Breakfast or midnight snack.

Most of my cereal killing is done at midnight.

I'm a ginger, but not candied.

And fruits and cakes should be kept separate, unless it's pineapple upside down cake.  Or chocolate cake with chocolate in it and raspberry sauce.  Or strawberry shortcake.  Or cheesecake with blueberries on it.  Except cheesecake is pie...  ???

This thread is a lot like an old fruitcake.
You can't keep it down.

If it's well made... I even eat it.
If not... I forgo the experience, and let anyone else have a bite :)

Hehe,
Axélle
PS: no idea if that make "for..." or "against...".
How about a: "Depends..."?

Quote from: Axélle on May 20, 2012, 12:49:39 AM
If it's well made... I even eat it.
If not... I forgo the experience, and let anyone else have a bite :)

Hehe,
Axélle
PS: no idea if that make "for..." or "against...".
How about a: "Depends..."?

THERE IS NO THIRD WAY  >:( ONLY YES OR NO.

Quote from: Pica Pica on May 20, 2012, 06:35:25 AM
THERE IS NO THIRD WAY  >:( ONLY YES OR NO.

OK babe, 'gooey fruitcake' sucks... unless due to just too much brandy in it?  >:-)

Better? :)

Axélle

This is always worth reading from the beginning.

are we back to this again?

it depends on who baked it. but knowing how much (or rather little) i like fruit in general, i suppose it's still a no from me.

updated some of the original post's pics that went dead. makes it a little more entertaining.

Bacon chocolate fruitcake....

"updated some of the original post's pics that went dead. makes it a little more entertaining."
LOL!

Although I think a good spiced cake containing dried fruit and nuts can be made, I have not had one.

italian panforte is delicious. dried fruits, nuts, honey, spice. but american fruitcake sounds nothing like it.

I like it soaked in alcohol.

Of course, I like just about anything soaked in alcohol.

Bacon soaked in alcohol...
Coated with chocolate...
Something, something about fruitcake....

Chocolate bacon flambe on fruitcake

I see a market for that

Any food in flames is fun.
If it explodes, even better...
Yep, flaming chocolate bacon fruitcake sounds like fun.
*Wonder if I can get it to explode when I want it to?
*There's got to be a video for making it on Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-UBw-q1wGaE
(also known as 'El Cakeo Diablo' in some countries)

Yep, Chocolate Bacon Flambe Fruitcake with optional explosion...
Ativan.

against fruitcake is slightly ahead, over all the years this post has run. pica normally brings it up every year, but i guess i will, if anyone else wants to add to it.

Fruitcake is evil. Did you know that all fruit cakes are exact copies of the meta cake squatting in nth dimensional cake space, plotting world domination. It's something about the interaction of the cake batter in the oven, it aligns into perfect phase and the meta cake is a little bit closer to its goals.

Could it be then that fruitcake is the path to quantum life?  If I eat it will I be in superposition with every point in the universe?  Or will I just have multidimensional indigestion?

It's been five years - it is my duty to bring this back, if just in memory of Nero.

Great to see you Pica Pica!!!  :icon_wave:  Been wondering how you'd been   

Hugs

V M

Always good me. I came on the site to see if anyone else got involved in this new 'Non-Binary' stories book coming out from Columbia University Press. I'm in there and it would be fun to see if anyone I 'know' is also.

Quote from: V M on March 16, 2019, 02:57:46 PM
Great to see you Pica Pica!!!  :icon_wave:  Hugs

Ditto! Will change my vote if can come to London for an autographed copy I'll be on the 08:25AM from Hartsfield-Jackson! Miss Nero too!

Nonbinary Memoirs of Gender and Identity (https://cup.columbia.edu/book/nonbinary/9780231185332) "23. The Flight of the M->-bleeped-<-ie, by Adam "PicaPica" Stevenson" ;D ( You see where NYC now has an "X" factor? No questions asked! )

Embrace your inner fruitcake. Be the cake.