General Discussions => General discussions => Fun and Games => Topic started by: Osiris on October 05, 2010, 04:43:37 PM Return to Full Version

Title: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 05, 2010, 04:43:37 PM
Bringin back an old Susan's classic.

If you're new to the game, it's very simple. You corrupt the wish of the person above you, then make a wish of your own.

Example:
Code Select
First post: I wish I had new shoes!
Reply: Wish granted! You have new shoes but they're horse shoes, here let me help you nail them to your feet. :D
I wish I could dance.

I'll start:

I wish I had something of importance to do today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 05, 2010, 04:58:57 PM
First post: I wish I had something of importance to do today.
Reply: Wish granted! You did but you should have started first thing this morning, because it is due at 5PM.

I wish I had bigger hips and butt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on October 05, 2010, 05:10:36 PM
Quote from: Janet Lynn on October 05, 2010, 04:58:57 PM
I wish I had bigger hips and butt.

Granted, but they're so big you can't fit into your clothes anymore.

I wish I had a large iced mocha.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 05, 2010, 06:52:04 PM
Granted! You have a large iced mocha, but the large size is 5 gallons and you have to drink it in 2 minutes. Good luck. :D

I wish I wasn't thirsty!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Shang on October 05, 2010, 06:55:26 PM
Quote from: Osiris on October 05, 2010, 06:52:04 PM

I wish I wasn't thirsty!

Granted, but you can't stop drinking and drown.

I wish I didn't have to go to class.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 05, 2010, 07:04:04 PM
Quote from: LukasGabriel on October 05, 2010, 06:55:26 PM
I wish I didn't have to go to class.

Granted.  You're expelled.

I wish I had more money than I could ever spend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 05, 2010, 07:17:55 PM
Quote from: glendagladwitch on October 05, 2010, 07:04:04 PM
I wish I had more money than I could ever spend.

Granted.  But you alone are responsible for the national debt of both the United States and Canada.

I wish I have a real house to live in.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 05, 2010, 10:35:05 PM
Quote from: Janet Lynn on October 05, 2010, 07:17:55 PM
Granted.  But you alone are responsible for the national debt of both the United States and Canada.

I wish I have a real house to live in.

Granted: one doll house with all the amenities.

I wish I was born with original parts that say/look male.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Meepit on October 05, 2010, 11:07:10 PM
Granted. But now your brain is female :o.

I wish counselling and therapy didn't have ridiculously long waiting lists.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 05, 2010, 11:52:32 PM
Granted... Counselling and therapy have been outlawed in your area

I wish I were turning 19 instead of 49 tomorrow
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 05, 2010, 11:54:31 PM
Granted.  You are 19 again.  But you have to live your life over again, just as it was.

I wish I had an SO.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 06, 2010, 12:04:39 AM
Granted... Not only do you have an SO, you have a so 'n so for an SO

I wish I would have stayed home for dinner rather than go to the apt. building pot luck
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 06, 2010, 12:54:04 AM
Granted... but you got allergic to your food and need a cortisone injection now.

I wish my dishes were already done.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 06, 2010, 11:51:50 AM
Granted, you have no dishes so no need to clean them! Better load up on napkins though. :D

I wish it weren't so cold.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 06, 2010, 11:56:06 AM
Granted.  It is now 120o, in the shade. And A/C is illegal.

I wish that I had a job, that allowed me to at least live paycheck to paycheck.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 06, 2010, 11:59:36 AM
Granted, buy the paychecks are not covered.

I wish I were not a smoker.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rosemary on October 06, 2010, 12:03:49 PM
Granted, now you live the rest of your life with withdrawal symptoms.

I wish I have a garden.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 06, 2010, 12:12:37 PM
Granted. It's full of snakes, spiders and leeches.

I wish I had a bucket full of gold.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 07, 2010, 03:21:12 PM
Granted! Here's a bucket full of gold... paint. Just think of what you can paint and make all shiny and sparkly looking! :D

I wish I had something awesome and delicious to eat!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on October 07, 2010, 03:28:41 PM
Quote from: Osiris on October 07, 2010, 03:21:12 PM
I wish I had something awesome and delicious to eat!
Granted; but Satan's seagull just bombed it.

I wish I had a more sushi.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ayaname on October 07, 2010, 04:05:16 PM
Quote from: Shades O'Grey on October 07, 2010, 03:28:41 PM
I wish I had a more sushi.

Granted, one parasite platter coming up...

I wish I had more close friends.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 07, 2010, 04:17:22 PM
Granted, but they'll all fall manically in love with you and stalk you for the rest of your life.

I wish my desk were tidy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Hurtfulsplash on October 07, 2010, 04:19:03 PM
Granted, it's so tidy that nothing is on it anymore.

I wish I was in better shape.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 07, 2010, 04:23:54 PM
Granted:  you are the most beautifully shaped pretzel I ever saw.

I wish I could do three things at once  and then relax before repeating it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 07, 2010, 05:30:39 PM
Granted.  You grow extra two arms for handling things.  You work 14 hours a day, relax for a 1/2 hr and begin again.

I wish I had a better figure, more curvy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 07, 2010, 05:54:00 PM
Granted. You have a marvellous figure now, but the face of a toad and you stink like rotten fish.

I wish I had a nice partner.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 07, 2010, 06:29:39 PM
Granted... You now have a nice partner but they have the face of a toad and stink like rotten fish  :laugh: >:-) :laugh:

I wish my birthday lasted longer and I could get presents for a whole week
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 07, 2010, 06:53:00 PM
Granted. Your birthday lasts a week, but that's because it took you a week to be born - you are 5.000 feet tall.

I wish I could get done with the translation I'm working on in the next couple of hours.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ayaname on October 07, 2010, 07:42:06 PM
Quote from: Fencesitter on October 07, 2010, 06:53:00 PM
I wish I could get done with the translation I'm working on in the next couple of hours.

Granted, now all your work is in Chinese.

I wish I was a more average female height.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 07, 2010, 07:56:50 PM
Quote from: Ayaname on October 07, 2010, 07:42:06 PM

I wish I was a more average female height.

Granted:  You are now the height of the average female etruscan pygmy shrew.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn1.arkive.org%2Fmedia%2F20%2F20AD6F9D-A9EE-4E90-9E38-9B435F904F5E%2FPresentation.Landing%2FSavis-pygmy-shrew-size-comparison-with-human-hand.jpg&hash=0b3c1c80cb965622a4d7f3f2d92308f5844bf16c)

I wish for happiness.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 07, 2010, 08:48:27 PM
Granted. Your worst enemy is full of happiness now, whereas you are absolutely miserable.

I wish I'll have a nice week-end.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on October 08, 2010, 01:23:01 AM
Granted, but you will be having so much fun that time will fly very quickly.  Better get started; you have 5 seconds until Monday.

I wish that it will be sunny all week.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Katelyn Alexandra on October 08, 2010, 01:59:51 AM
Granted, sunny all week causing dryness, excessive hear, drought, and fires.

I wish I wasn't so impatient.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Meepit on October 08, 2010, 02:08:09 AM
Granted, you're so patient, you wait till the end of the universe to act on anything.

I wish certain people weren't coming over for thanksgiving (saying they died won't work in this situation ;D be creative).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Katelyn Alexandra on October 08, 2010, 03:01:25 AM
They don't come over, but you have the same amount of food you would have even if they did, which causes you to eat more. All the food is tainted with bacteria which only affects you if you eat too much, which you do because there are less people there to compete with. You therefore get horribly sick for a long period of time.

I wish I was telekinetic.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rejennyrated on October 08, 2010, 03:57:52 AM
Granted, you are now telekinetic, but unfortunately due to a rare genetic aberration in the telekinetic population you have no brakes and hence no ability to stop thing s once you have set them in motion.  As a result all your things are smashed to pieces and you are covered in cuts and bruises and usually find that you have to stay in bed all day for safety.

I wish I was a young girl again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 08, 2010, 08:44:11 AM
Quote from: rejennyrated on October 08, 2010, 03:57:52 AM

I wish I was a young girl again.

Granted.  You are physically and mentally one day old and remain so for the rest of your days.

I wish I had miraculous healing powers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on October 10, 2010, 02:55:05 PM
Granted. You have mircalous healing powers but now thousands of people come to you everyday wanting you to heal them and it annoys you to no end. I wish I was slender.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Meepit on October 10, 2010, 03:11:14 PM
Granted. You're so slender, you slip into cracks in the floor and get blown away with the lightest breeze.

I wish I didn't see the results on my last assignment compared to others....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 10, 2010, 08:50:09 PM
Granted. You've become blind.

I wish I knew how too cook Asian food.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 10, 2010, 08:52:23 PM
Granted.  And suddenly there are now cats in your neighborhood.   Ewwwwwwwwwwwww

I wish I had just a few more shoes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on October 10, 2010, 09:03:21 PM
Granted: You now have billions of shoes... however they are all 5 sizes too small

I wish that I could do well in school
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 11, 2010, 07:55:30 AM
Quote from: Michael Alexander on October 10, 2010, 09:03:21 PM
I wish that I could do well in school

Granted.  You've been allowed to start over, and are now acing kindergarten.

I wish for the next person to post to type something funny in a Transylvanian accent and end it with "Mua! Hua! Hua! Hua! Hau!"
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 11, 2010, 08:51:50 AM
Quote from: glendagladwitch on October 11, 2010, 07:55:30 AM
I wish for the next person to post to type something funny in a Transylvanian accent and end it with "Mua! Hua! Hua! Hua! Hau!"

Granted, but now ve know vhere you leeve und shall soock your blood.  Mua! Hua! Hua! Hua! Hau!

I vish for more candles
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 10:07:48 AM
Granted, but you'll need them as you couldn't pay for electricity and it's been turned off.

I wish I can finish my next translation on time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 11, 2010, 10:36:52 AM
Granted though your accuracy leaves something to be desired.
You have embarassed someone by your mistranslation.
I wish for a  much earlier transition or hypnotise all who knew me before into using and thinking correct pronouns/gender.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 10:59:13 AM
Granted. Either you've transitioned at age 6 including hormones etc. which makes you a very small person, or people use and think the correct pronouns/gender but the hypnosis went wrong and they think you're an >-bleeped-<.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 11, 2010, 12:52:09 PM
I guess Fencesitter didn't have a wish.

I wish I had more pants that fit well and look good. :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 01:22:14 PM
Granted. Unfortunately, they all wash out and lose their shape the first time you wash them.

I wish I had a brother or sister.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 11, 2010, 01:28:08 PM
Granted.  You now have 3813 brothers and sisters.  But we all want you to do something for us and your life becomes nothing more than being someone else helper.

I wish I had medical insurance for my Cats.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 11, 2010, 02:04:25 PM
Granted, but the pre-existing condition clauses and exclusions make it profitable for the insurance company but not usefull for cats.

I wish for affordable insurance that covered all I need it to.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 02:51:43 PM
Granted, but that insurance is so bureaucratic that it takes them 15 years in average to pay for whatever you need.

I wish I had a nice warm pair of boots for the winter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 11, 2010, 06:30:41 PM
Quote from: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 02:51:43 PM
I wish I had a nice warm pair of boots for the winter.

Granted:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2Fthumb%2F3%2F3a%2FThigh_High_Boots.jpg%2F220px-Thigh_High_Boots.jpg&hash=530261ab526d52df131aca177512cec683a17db3)

I wish for the next poster to get their heart's desire.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 11, 2010, 07:19:38 PM
AAARGH!!!! Really the kind of boots I'd only wear in the middle of nowhere if it's freezing cold and there's like no alternative. Or in certain... well... special circumstances. As long as it's clear it's drag and it's not in public, I'm fine with it. And... well... they're kind of hot and would look good on me together with nylons... and... well whatever... >-bleeped-<e. Transguy with transvestitic fetishism? Here I am. Well you corrupted my wish less than you thought you would.  ;D

My heart's desire is really not what I want to deal with in my every day's life, so that's a good corrupt your wish.

I wish my neighbor's old dog had a stronger bladder.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 11, 2010, 07:36:38 PM
Granted your neighbor's dog can now pee on objects that are several feet away and likes to aim at you whenever you're outside of the house so you have to run like hell to avoid being peed on everytime you go somewhere.

I wish I weren't so damn lazy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 11, 2010, 08:06:12 PM
Quote from: Osiris on October 11, 2010, 07:36:38 PM
Granted your neighbor's dog can now pee on objects that are several feet away and likes to aim at you whenever you're outside of the house so you have to run like hell to avoid being peed on everytime you go somewhere.
:laugh: >:-) :laugh:

Granted... You have so much energy you drive all you neighbors nuts

I wish tonight's Monday Night Football game would stop being delayed and they would start the game
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 12, 2010, 03:13:03 AM
Granted. They start the game but you suddenly get such a horrible headache that you can't watch it.

I wish my neighbors are in a good mood today (gonna go visit them in a couple of minutes for a coffee-break).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 12, 2010, 06:46:19 AM
They are, and have decided to stage a 48-hour Country and Western festival  in their backyard.

I wish I had a new pair of slippers.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 12, 2010, 06:55:19 AM
Granted, they are the wrong size though.

I wish I will sleep well tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 12, 2010, 06:58:49 AM
You will sleep so well you will not get up until 10 am, and your assignment will not be accepted late.

I wish the mouse in the ceiling would go elsewhere.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 12, 2010, 07:00:40 AM
Granted. It falls into your soup and drowns, and you only find it after having eaten most of the soup.

I wish I could stop smoking.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 12, 2010, 07:19:30 AM
Granted, but then you become addicted to chewing gum and coke-a-cola.

I wish i could sleep more
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 12, 2010, 07:23:24 AM
Granted. You prick your finger on a spindle, fall asleep for 100 years, and a prince with the personality of an >-bleeped-< kisses you awake and marries you.

I wish I'll have tasty food tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 12, 2010, 07:25:47 AM
Granted but you eat too much and then feel icky after eating

I wish my phones "lock" button wasn't broken.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on October 13, 2010, 06:14:48 PM
Granted your phones lock button is no longer broken. But the other buttons are now broken. I wish I had my own house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 13, 2010, 06:28:45 PM
You have a house of your own now. It's broken, and in a region where it's really dangerous to live as a trans person.

I wish I could write long texts on paper without smearing most of it (I'm left-handed).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on October 13, 2010, 06:32:16 PM
Granted! But only now you can't write at all! :B

I wish i had a big old cadillac with big old fins so i could drive around and show it off to all the guys at school! >=)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 13, 2010, 07:36:45 PM
Granted. But it costs you so much money that you're homeless now.

I wish I had more contracts for my work as a translator.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 14, 2010, 06:46:32 AM
Granted, but soon you have too much work and begin translating incorrectly

I wish i wasn't allergic to fish
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 14, 2010, 07:05:18 AM
Granted, but you have now become allergic to chips.

I wish my garage was tidy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 14, 2010, 07:16:28 AM
Granted, but then its not a garage so it has to be torn down and made untidy again

I wish that i had two pet snakes named Curly and Moe
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 14, 2010, 01:19:46 PM
Granted, but one's a rattle snake and the other is a black mamba. Plus you have no containers to keep them in and no antidote for their venom. Good luck. :D

I wish I didn't have to deal with that monthly feminine issue. >.<
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 14, 2010, 03:06:20 PM
Granted, but then you get male pms, which is ten times worse, plus nightly male issues every night, twice a night.

I wish my Chinese food wasn't so spicy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on October 14, 2010, 03:29:41 PM
Granted, but your chinese food is so bland it doesn't taste good at all

Now I wish... I had chinese food
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on October 14, 2010, 04:22:33 PM
Granted, but the food is a month old. =/

I wish I didn't have such bad mood swings.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 14, 2010, 06:22:48 PM
Granted, but then you would be monotone, uninteresting and always compared to a robot.

I wish i could get jushi her migraine medicine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 15, 2010, 08:55:47 PM
Quote from: Dusty on October 14, 2010, 06:22:48 PM
I wish i could get jushi her migraine medicine.

Granted.  But on the way home from the pharmacy, you are bamboozled into trading them for "magic beans."

I wish to win the lottery.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 15, 2010, 08:59:04 PM
Granted:  You are now next in line for the sacrifice to the dragon.

I wish I could be whole for one day
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 15, 2010, 09:09:31 PM
Granted... The gods hear your plea but don't speak good English and so now your a pothole on a NY city street

I wish I could quit my bad habits
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on October 15, 2010, 10:09:44 PM
Granted, but now you have new bad habits. I wish I could go ahead and divorce my ex.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 15, 2010, 11:21:26 PM
You do, and 5 minutes later she wins $400 million in the lottery.

I wish the cat would stop moaning and catch the mouse in the ceiling.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 15, 2010, 11:39:51 PM
Granted... The cat stops moaning and is now also up in the ceiling... But can't catch the mouse and their constant chasing about drives you bonkers and you get hauled off to the happy house for constantly yelling at the ceiling every place you go

I wish I could win $400 Million in the lottery
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 15, 2010, 11:43:23 PM
You do, but because your ex bought the ticket for you, she claims it.  The lawyers bills total $400,000,000.01

I wish I had some pancakes with maple syrup.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on October 15, 2010, 11:54:03 PM
You do, but theres more maple syrup than pancake and its just unappeitizing now =P

I wish i could get gasoline for free
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 16, 2010, 12:51:23 AM
granted, but you can only drink the free gasoline.

i wish i could yell at the moon with Buzz Aldrin.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rite_of_inversion on October 16, 2010, 12:56:08 AM
"i wish i could yell at the moon with Buzz Aldrin. "

You only can do so because the poor guy fell off the wagon and has been on a three-day drinking binge. >:-) (love you Mr Aldrin)

I wish I could drive a Porsche 944 at 180 MPH...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 16, 2010, 01:02:37 AM
Granted but you crash and die so now can only drive as a ghost.


I wish to complete transition in a timely fashion as in 2 years and not 20 as it is costing me now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rite_of_inversion on October 16, 2010, 01:09:53 AM
Granted. You do so because I crashed into you in my Porsche, and the insurance settlement from the resulting paraplegia allows you to fully transition rapidly...in the physical rehabilitation hospital.

I want to be more energetic.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 16, 2010, 01:13:24 AM
Granted:  You are now so energetic that you can not sleep for the 20 years.

I wish I would not sleep so much.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 16, 2010, 06:53:53 AM
You don't.  You now suffer from insomnia. :o

I wish I had another bottle of Champagne.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 16, 2010, 09:12:45 AM
granted, but you suddenly realize that you hate this particular bottle and have a breakdown

I wish i didn't have to go to a party tonight
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 16, 2010, 10:41:13 AM
Granted. The other invited guests have just agreed that they all hate you and have asked you explicitely not to come.

I wish I could sleep well tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on October 16, 2010, 10:43:10 AM
Granted, but you sleep so well you slept through your alarm and miss your appoinntment. I wish I had an million bucks.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 16, 2010, 11:08:03 AM
Granted: You now have a million Bucks, but like any good herd you now also have 4 million Does.

I wish it was still SUmmer
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 16, 2010, 05:06:53 PM
Granted. The earth does not rotate around the sun any more, so you're stuck with summer for the rest of your life. Unfortunately, the earth also does not spin around its own axis any more, so the average temperture in your region rises to 500°C.

I wish I had a cat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on October 16, 2010, 05:14:59 PM
You do, but it's a sabertooth and you have to leave your house so it doesnt kill you

I wish i could smoke and have it not be bad for me
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 16, 2010, 10:17:17 PM
Quote from: rexgsd on October 16, 2010, 05:14:59 PM
You do, but it's a sabertooth and you have to leave your house so it doesnt kill you

I wish i could smoke and have it not be bad for me

Granted.  Now when you smoke, other people get cancer.

I wish for telekinetic powers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 17, 2010, 02:57:12 AM
Granted. You use them to rob a bank, get caught and land in prison for 10 years.  :-\

I wish I had a melon here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 17, 2010, 05:51:38 AM
You do , but you don't have a refridgerator so the 47 kg you didn't eat goes off.

I wish there was something decent on TV.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 17, 2010, 10:44:25 AM
granted, but then your cable goes out and you can't watch it

i wish my homework would do itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 17, 2010, 10:53:40 AM
Granted:  But it is done poorly and you get a failing grade.

I wish I had propane for heat.   brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 17, 2010, 12:45:08 PM
granted but then you realize you only had 15 minutes worth of warmth and can't afford any more propane.

I wish to do good in my tournament today
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on October 17, 2010, 01:04:31 PM
you do, and you actually win the whole thing, but then you get a blanket party after because everyone else is jealous

i wish peanut butter didnt have so much damn fat in it
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on October 17, 2010, 01:46:59 PM
Granted, Peanut Butter has zero fat, but the sodium content is tripled...

I wish weekends could last forever
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 17, 2010, 02:24:46 PM
Granted:  It is now Saturday and Sunday forever.  However You now have to work every weekend.

I wish I own a Maserati.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on October 17, 2010, 02:27:28 PM
you do, but someone steals the wheels/tires and you cant afford new ones

i wish i had a special card for dunkin donuts so i could get free coffee for life!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on October 17, 2010, 03:14:00 PM
Granted, but all the Dunkin Donuts close down except for one on the other side of the planet...

I wish I had started transition 20 years ago
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 19, 2010, 06:29:50 AM
granted, and it cost you $50,000 ,but they introduced a 120% tax deduction on it 19 years ago.
I wish I had some avocadoes.


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 19, 2010, 10:58:07 AM
granted but they taste like pineapples.

i wish i had some money for lunch
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 19, 2010, 12:49:16 PM
granted: it is in foreign currency and all banks and such to exchange it are no longer in service.

I wish hoaxers had to suffer quadruple embarrasment and be poorest of the poor for the rest of their lives.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on October 19, 2010, 06:20:10 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on October 19, 2010, 12:49:16 PM
granted: it is in foreign currency and all banks and such to exchange it are no longer in service.

I wish hoaxers had to suffer quadruple embarrasment and be poorest of the poor for the rest of their lives.

Granted.  But, due to the decreased budgets, big foot costumes, flying saucer videos, and "miracles" become so pathetically transparent that they are no longer even remotely entertaining.  And the "Virgin Mary" grilled cheese sandwich you buy off ebay winds up looking like Daphne Duck.

I wish my boss weren't so abusive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 20, 2010, 05:35:15 AM
Your boss stops being abusive by retiring, and is replaced by a guy with excruciating body odour, halitosis, dandruff  and a need to stand close to you as he is partially deaf.

I wish I could afford a holiday.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 20, 2010, 10:49:02 AM
granted, but halfway through your hotel is infested with lice, bed bugs and the water is shut off

i wish i had more than one pair of pants that fit
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on October 20, 2010, 07:11:07 PM
Granted, but they all have big holes in the back of them and everyone can see your underwear. I wish I could the other books I want in one trip at the bookstore.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 21, 2010, 06:54:16 AM
Grante, but you get caught by the Book Liberation Front, and they take the lot.

I wish I had a pair of fluffy pink slippers, with bunny ears on them.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 21, 2010, 08:45:06 AM
Quote from: justmeinoz on October 21, 2010, 06:54:16 AM
I wish I had a pair of fluffy pink slippers, with bunny ears on them.

You do but they size 3 (US) in kid shoes.

I wish I knew why my sleep habits are screwing up.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 21, 2010, 11:24:25 AM
granted, but then it turns out it's because you're secretly a vigilante, and you're OK with this, but the police are not and then you are arrested because vigilantes are illegal.

i wish for a nap
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tad on October 24, 2010, 02:39:45 PM
Wish granted, but you shortly wake up because you had a falling dream.

hmmm. I wish for a hystorectomy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 25, 2010, 04:03:20 AM
Wish granted, but your surgeon takes out the bladder as well.

I wish for peace on Earth.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 25, 2010, 07:11:23 AM
Peace breaks out, but then people in the Middle East start arguing about who has the most peaceful country.

I wish the renovations at work were finished.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 25, 2010, 11:28:58 AM
Quote from: justmeinoz on October 25, 2010, 07:11:23 AM
Peace breaks out, but then people in the Middle East start arguing about who has the most peaceful country.

U made my day!  :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on October 27, 2010, 11:18:15 AM
They speed through the construction process, leaving a weakened floor in the bathroom.  You fall through onto your bosses desk the first time you sit on the toilet.

I wish that all of my pharmacy school applications will come back as acceptance letters.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on October 29, 2010, 12:14:19 PM
granted, but then you can't choose which school to go to, and wind up not choosing until the very last minute.

I wish my girlfriend liked Halloween more.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on October 29, 2010, 12:19:17 PM
She develops a debilitating addiction to candy corn.

I wish I could stay inside and watch Eureka all day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 30, 2010, 12:40:01 AM
You can, but the DVD has a scratch through the last 5 minutes.

I wish underwire bras were more comfortable.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on October 30, 2010, 12:43:48 AM
Granted All underwire bras are now comfortable.  But you become allergic to the underwire material.

I wish I could find a decent bra that would give me cleavage.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fencesitter on October 31, 2010, 10:06:15 PM
Granted. But new-born Christians come to power and showing cleavage in public or to anyone not being your husband is not allowed any more.
I wish having watched The Ring (Japanese original) again on Helloween wouldn't interfere with my sleeping habits.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 01, 2010, 12:43:03 AM
While sleeping comfortably a creepy girl crawls out and attacks you.

I wish I had a flat chest and washboard abs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 01, 2010, 07:11:28 AM
You have a flat chest and washboard abs - to go with your non-existent backside and water wing arms.

I wish petrol was 25 cents a litre.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dusty on November 01, 2010, 10:12:31 PM
granted, but it doesn't last as long as it should.

i wish internet service was reliable.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 01, 2010, 11:21:43 PM
It is, but it's unavailable in your area.

I wish my Spanish paper would write itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 01, 2010, 11:42:04 PM
Granted... Your Spanish paper writes itself... In Russian

I wish I could get all my guitars professionally repaired
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 01, 2010, 11:47:14 PM
They are repaired by professional drywall hangers.

I wish I had a maid.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 02, 2010, 07:02:30 AM
You have a maid.  She is then deported as an illegal immigrant, and you are charged with breaking the labour laws by underpaying her.

I wish tights wouldn't run.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on November 03, 2010, 07:05:57 PM
Granted. But the material is now so strong that it can stop bullets.  Consequently, all tights have been requisitioned for use by the military, and it is illegal for civilians to own or possess tights.

I wish the government had bailed out homeowners instead of banks.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 05, 2010, 06:15:48 PM
Granted... The government gives homeowners large bail out checks... But now there are no banks to cash them at and you crash while riding your broom around to find one

I wish the holiday seasons didn't depress the stuff out of me
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on November 06, 2010, 01:09:59 AM
Granted, only now you are depressed the rest of the year instead....

I wish I could be as pretty as Brittany Murphy was
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 06, 2010, 07:02:58 AM
You mean Brittany Murphy who lives round the corner and won the "Ugliest Woman In Australia 2010" contest , don"t you? Zap!!

I wish my cat wouldn't scratch the carpet to pieces.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on November 06, 2010, 02:38:57 PM
Granted, but now he scratches the curtains, couch, and all the sheets on your bed to pieces.

I wish i could get a good winter beater car for free
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 06, 2010, 02:57:09 PM
[Ew, and here I thought we French gamers were original with that game.]

Granted. Go to the car store closest to your home to be offered an old Lada car with mechanical arms that end with boxing gloves for hitting snow banks repeatedly.

I wish I could resist sugar's appeal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 07, 2010, 06:10:52 AM
You can, but being French you still fall victim to sucre'.
>:-)

I wish there was actually non-fat mayonnaise.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Raven on November 12, 2010, 01:44:24 AM
Granted but it   tastes aweful and you throw out the jar. I wish I had a few pickles with peanut butter on it lolz
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 12, 2010, 05:23:50 AM
Granted.  You now have a jar of pickles and a jar of peanut butter.  You also have no thumbs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 12, 2010, 05:28:37 PM
justmeinoz forgot her wish.

I wish the dishes would clean themselves on their own.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on November 12, 2010, 06:19:53 PM
Granted! You're dishes are now self cleaning but break when they clean themselves so your left with clean broken dishes.

I wish that I had a machine to multiply sodas and gatorade
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 12, 2010, 07:05:46 PM
Granted ! However, they multiply biologically. You do NOT want to drink it.

I wish I were faster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 12, 2010, 07:11:14 PM
Granted, but everything you do is faster.  Nobody can understand you when you talk.

I wish my rent were cheaper.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 12, 2010, 08:27:41 PM
Granted... Your rent is now free because you now live under a tree on the side of a highway

I wish I had a date this weekend
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 12, 2010, 08:33:57 PM
Granted. November 13th, 2010. There.

I wish I could teleport food from home when I forget my lunch box instead of ruining myself at a restaurant.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rite_of_inversion on November 12, 2010, 09:57:07 PM
Granted.  Your refrigerator materializes over you head and falls on you causing you to be rushed to the hospital with life threatening crushing injuries.

I wish I had bigger muscles
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on November 12, 2010, 10:00:30 PM
Granted! You have gained 800lbs of muscle on your body & are unable to carry around that muscle weight to walk.

I wish that I could get my letter for Testosterone now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on November 12, 2010, 10:12:48 PM
Granted you get a letter for testosterone, however, it's not for you and you have to give it to me. MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! *evil*

I wish my stomach would stop hurting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tom on November 12, 2010, 10:18:24 PM
Quote from: Osiris on November 12, 2010, 10:12:48 PMI wish my stomach would stop hurting.

GRANTED! Your stomach pain vanishes instantly...however you no longer have a stomach. You look pale? Is something wrong? X)

I wish I had a DRAGON! XD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 12, 2010, 10:56:16 PM
Granted... You now have a fire breathing dragon with a gastric condition and every time it belches or passes gas it sets something in your place on fire

I wish the insomnia monster would leave me alone so I could get a good nights sleep
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rite_of_inversion on November 12, 2010, 11:03:07 PM
granted: you now have an extreme, uncontrollable case of narcolepsy and will fall asleep at any time with no warning.

I wish I had an exciting and challenging job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on November 12, 2010, 11:06:46 PM
Quote from: rite_of_inversion on November 12, 2010, 11:03:07 PM

I wish I had an exciting and challenging job.
granted! you work on roller coasters and are run over by one and have serious injuries.
i wish i were already done transitioning

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 13, 2010, 12:13:14 AM
Granted. You are COMPLETELY done transitioning. A little too completely. You have transitioned from human to soil.

I wish I would stop wasting so much time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 13, 2010, 06:42:47 AM
I got my wish, to forget certain things- just forgot to say what!

A, you no longer have any time to waste as you are so busy you burn out from over-work and have to live in  a monastery permanently to recover.

I wish I had a nice bottle of Moscato.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 13, 2010, 05:42:09 PM
Granted. Luciano Moscato was murdered by the mafia yesterday, and a bottle of purée from him is has been delivered on your doorstep.

I wish my city's bus service was better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on November 13, 2010, 05:50:36 PM
granted, its better, but also 10 times more expensive now :p

i wish i only had to get two hours of sleep to be good for the day
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 13, 2010, 06:54:07 PM
Granted, but your eyes have dried out from staying open for too long.

I wish I had a meatball sub right now..
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 13, 2010, 07:14:37 PM
Granted... You now have a meatball sub that is four feet long and have been entered into a contest to eat all of it before your opponent finishes theirs

I wish I had a new car so I don't have to ride my bicycle to the store in the freezing cold
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on November 13, 2010, 07:44:14 PM
you do, but its so new its actually from the future and you cant understand how to operate it

i wish i could teleport to the store and get some diet pepsi
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on November 13, 2010, 11:52:02 PM
you do but the store you teleport to is across the world and you have no way to get home.

I wish i could could finally win a million dollars on a scratch ticket
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on November 14, 2010, 12:24:36 AM
Granted, but it happens so far into the future, that inflation has compounded to the point that a loaf of bread costs two-million dollars.


I wish a distant, unknown relative would leave me their family fortune.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 14, 2010, 04:10:11 AM
Unfortunately you are also unknown to their executors and as they can't find you,  the family fortune is left to a cats home.

I wish I didn't have this sinus infection.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 14, 2010, 07:29:58 AM
You're cured but now you have a chest infection.

I wish I won't get crazy acne on T...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on November 14, 2010, 06:30:42 PM
Granted, but you body had a weird reaction, so instead you got a crazy rash all over your body.

I wish i could fall asleep at night
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 14, 2010, 07:21:54 PM
Granted. Thanks to your newly found narcolepsy, you can now fall asleep at night. At noon, too. And at a supper, too.

I wish clean clothes would fold itself alone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 15, 2010, 02:17:22 AM
It does, but it also ties itself in knots, origami cranes, etc, leaving you with really weird wrinkle patters.

I wish pomegranates were easier to eat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SnailPace on November 15, 2010, 02:47:27 AM
Quote from: Lee on November 15, 2010, 02:17:22 AM
It does, but it also ties itself in knots, origami cranes, etc, leaving you with really weird wrinkle patters.

I wish pomegranates were easier to eat.
Granted! Pomegranates are so easy to eat that you forget how to eat anything else! It's all so complicated now... too bad you're a television chef!

I wish that I had bigger muscles.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 15, 2010, 04:24:22 AM
Granted, your toe muscles are so big you are in the Guinness Book of Records.

I wish the rosellas that have nested in the roof (wasn't mice after all!) would all  fly away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 15, 2010, 11:35:11 AM
Granted. A tornado passes by and the rosellas fly away. Your roof does, too.

I wish I could keep a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 15, 2010, 03:13:52 PM
You now have a job for life, and that job is garbage collector.

I wish I were a better dancer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 15, 2010, 10:52:11 PM
You are!! And...you've just snapped your achilles tendon and your career is over.

I wish I wasn't constipated right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 15, 2010, 10:53:52 PM
Granted. You have diarrhea right now.

I wish I could sleep well without my sleeping pill.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 15, 2010, 11:16:16 PM
Granted, but you realize that you've become addicted to sleeping pills and need to take them anyways.

I wish I looked this cool in sunglasses.  8)

Quote from: jamherst on November 15, 2010, 10:52:11 PM
You are!! And...you've just snapped your achilles tendon and your career is over.
Side note: this actually happened to a friend of mine who is a dance teacher.  She was dancing when a mirror fell off the wall and severed her achilles tendon.  Several surgeries and about a year later she's just starting to dance again.  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 15, 2010, 11:22:50 PM
Granted--your new cool sunglasses comes with a disability cane.

I wish my room was warm.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on November 16, 2010, 01:03:53 AM
granted! your room is 130 degrees now

i wish i was asleep right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on November 16, 2010, 01:17:21 AM
Granted, but you fall asleep for so long you miss all the plans you had for tommorow.

I wish my crush liked me back.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 16, 2010, 05:23:23 AM
They like you so much they have become a stalker. ( Have you looked in the saucepan for your sister's gerbil? )

I wish there was something decent on TV.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 16, 2010, 12:01:17 PM
Granted. There is now a very nice sculpture on top of your television.

I wish I understood something about arrays in program scripts.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 16, 2010, 08:07:30 PM
Now you do--and you know nothing else and live in your parent's basement scripting all day and drinking diet coke.

I wish my immune system was better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 16, 2010, 08:09:59 PM
Your immune system goes into overdrive giving you fibromyalgia.

I wish it were Thanksgiving break.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SnailPace on November 16, 2010, 11:52:51 PM
Quote from: Lee on November 16, 2010, 08:09:59 PM
Your immune system goes into overdrive giving you fibromyalgia.

I wish it were Thanksgiving break.
It is.  You eat Turkey dinner on the first day which causes you to sleep through the rest!

I wish post-secondary school was free.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on November 17, 2010, 12:23:49 AM
It is, and now so many people want to go so there is no room for you

I wish I could meet megan fox.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 17, 2010, 12:55:26 AM
You can, but this kid decides to hunt down all the fans she will actually talk to.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Flifemisled.com%2Fimages%2Ff%2FMegan_Fox_NoFlowers_4.jpg&hash=46b6735fd6bfc3c1575c0412e07fa14169325755)
I wish I had started studying earlier for my ochem test.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 17, 2010, 02:36:54 AM
You did, but they decided to put it on 2 weeks early.

I wish I had Megan Fox's figure.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 17, 2010, 12:53:35 PM
Granted. You now have a paper with the figure she draws and calls her initials.

I wish I would actually go to bed when I know I should.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 17, 2010, 04:40:13 PM
Granted. I'll personally come over every night and knock you unconscious.

I wish my straight stalkers would all gather and burn to death.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 17, 2010, 05:21:38 PM
Granted... You lure your stalkers into standing in a large fire pit and then light them up then relax in a fold out beach chair while the Johnny Cash song "Ring of Fire" plays in the background

I wish someone would knock my next door neighbor unconscious on a regular basis (as in, anytime he's awake)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 17, 2010, 06:27:37 PM
Granted. I'm the man for that job...as you have seen, I have experience from the last post  :D. However...I get arrested for multiple assault and your neighbors are still victorious.

I wish I wasn't freaking out right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Rainey on November 18, 2010, 01:32:55 AM
You stop freaking out but now you are in a grumpy mood.


I wish could pass algebra.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 18, 2010, 05:54:29 AM
You pass Algebra, and end up in the French Lit Exam.  Algebra was on the next floor.

I wish my hair would stay put.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 18, 2010, 07:50:13 AM
Granted. Your hair falls to the ground and definitely stays put there.

I wish my co-tenant was not so hard-headed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 18, 2010, 07:51:31 AM
Their head is now so soft that they have to wear a helmet everywhere.

I wish the weather were  better today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tad on November 20, 2010, 04:24:17 PM
The weather is better. In fact it's nice and hot out. But your air conditioner breaks and you slowly cook to death in your house.

I wish I had a penis.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 20, 2010, 05:29:04 PM
Granted... You are now hung like a horse and have a penis a full meter long and everyone calls you "The tripod"

I wish I could send someone to go to the store for me (It's cold and snowing outside  :P)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 20, 2010, 08:33:33 PM
Granted. Your 5-year-old cousin offers to do the job. You can send him to the store. But it does not mean he will come back.

I wish winter arrived all of a sudden and left the same way (Like, no -10°C - 8°C - -15°C - rain - snow - sun - snow - rain)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 20, 2010, 09:00:00 PM
Granted, it's gone from 32' C to -30 overnight, and all your winter clothes are in a trunk in the garage, under a metre of snow.

I wish I didn't have a huge swath of weeds in my lawn giving me hay fever.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on November 23, 2010, 05:18:12 AM
Granted.  The DOT takes your lawn by imminent domain and paves over it.

I wish I could sleep, and not wake up at night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on November 23, 2010, 05:43:51 AM
Granted, you now sleep soundly through every night but you never wake up on time ever again

I wish my T letter would come in the mail today
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 23, 2010, 06:17:17 AM
Granted, You may have all the T you want but there is no T shipped to your country's pharmacies anymore making you buy it from out of the country at double the cost.

I wish for a relatively pain free life from now on.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 23, 2010, 06:38:33 AM
Granted. Due to an industrial accident you are left numb from the neck down.

I wish there was a high speed rail link between my town and Melbourne.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 23, 2010, 06:50:11 AM
Granted, but it derails so often that it doesn't ave you any timeor money.

I wish....for 3 more wishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jamherst on November 24, 2010, 06:44:26 AM
Granted--but since your turn is over...I get the wishes.

I wish my turds were smaller.
I wish this vitamin B complex didn't smell so bad.
I wish that these extra wishes doesn't confuse the game.

...But it probably will.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on November 24, 2010, 09:48:04 AM
Granted. However, I don't know what a turd so I'll make something random smaller. Say, your head.
Granted. It's now the vitamin B simple that smells so bad.
Granted. It just confused me.

I wish it were easier to just live through life.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on November 29, 2010, 12:19:08 AM
Yay! I love this game!

Granted, it's easier for everyone except you.

I wish I knew what happens after you die.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SnailPace on November 29, 2010, 01:40:38 AM
Quote from: The Unforgiven on November 29, 2010, 12:19:08 AM
Yay! I love this game!

Granted, it's easier for everyone except you.

I wish I knew what happens after you die.
Once you die, you're reincarnated, only to wonder what happens when you die every life you live OVER and OVER.

I wish it was easy being vegan.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 29, 2010, 03:02:39 AM
Granted but it is hard to be a carnivore and  you have to listen to all of them wish it were easier to be a carnivore or vegetarian instead.

I wish I understood people more and *sigh*...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 29, 2010, 05:51:33 AM
After many years pondering the imponderable and meditating deeply you gain total insight into all the people you meet.  You are so appalled you become a hermit.

I wish my tooth filling I had redone last week would stop falling out.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on November 29, 2010, 04:35:34 PM
Granted, it stops falling out because the last time it does you lose it and can never put it back in.

I wish my body wasn't so sore.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Unconditional Acceptance on November 29, 2010, 10:56:46 PM
Granted. Your body is so marvelously relaxed that you can no longer move. Premature rigor mortis sets in out of boredom.

I wish my finals would get distracted by something shiny so I could safely ignore them.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 30, 2010, 02:04:26 AM
Same here
They wander off just to come back in time for next semester's finals.  You get the joy of both!

I wish the material for my Spanish lit class were more interesting/less about murder and rape.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on November 30, 2010, 05:31:24 AM
Granted, the text for Spanish Lit is the Spanish edition of " Advanced Accounting and Double Entry Bookkeeping."

I wish the cat would stop getting underfoot.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on November 30, 2010, 03:01:33 PM
Granted, the cat is no longer underfoot as it's securely clawed to your back. Ouch, that looks painful.

I wish I had a more entertaining way to spend this afternoon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on November 30, 2010, 03:15:51 PM
You do... A bunch of relatives just showed up at your place unannounced  :laugh: Have fun

I wish my bruised up ribs would heal up and stop hurting so much
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: E on November 30, 2010, 03:26:42 PM
Your bruised rib is more than just "fine" - it's better than it's ever been before! Everyone you show it to agrees, that's one healthy-looking rib, and it defintely doesn't hurt anymore. Of course, that's because it's now sticking out your chest...

I wish for a reasonable quantity of chocolate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on November 30, 2010, 05:21:05 PM
You have it, but much like cake, you cannot have your chocolate and eat it too.

I wish I could compose.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: E on November 30, 2010, 05:23:42 PM
Quote from: Lee on November 30, 2010, 05:21:05 PM
You have it, but much like cake, you cannot have your chocolate and eat it too.

I wish I could compose.
Granted.

Oh - did you mean you wanted to be any good at it?


I wish I had the power to clone trees.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 01, 2010, 01:53:58 AM
Granted, but some guy in a time traveling DeLorean runs the cloned tree over every time you make it.  ::)

I wish I could disappear at will and be completely alone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 01, 2010, 04:34:04 AM
Granted, you get to disappear and be alone every time your football team looks like they are going to win a game.

I wish my panel-beater neighbour didn't have a backyard full of old cars.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 01, 2010, 10:12:46 AM
All the cars are abducted by aliens (Along with half the rest of the neighborhood.)

I wish I knew what to get everyone for Christmas.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 01, 2010, 02:06:56 PM
Granted. You know what they all want. Sadly, your bank account is empty.

I wish Christmas was fun.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on December 01, 2010, 03:38:02 PM
Granted, Christmas is the most fun holiday ever. In fact it's the most fun thing anyone can experience in their entire life! But you convert to a religion that forbids participation.

I wish I had someone around to play with.  >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SnailPace on December 01, 2010, 04:26:56 PM
Quote from: Osiris on December 01, 2010, 03:38:02 PM
Granted, Christmas is the most fun holiday ever. In fact it's the most fun thing anyone can experience in their entire life! But you convert to a religion that forbids participation.

I wish I had someone around to play with.  >:-)
Granted.  Your cat unexpectedly has a litter of kittens!

I wish there was a way I could bring my son to work with me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on December 01, 2010, 04:53:26 PM
You can... But your boss notices that he can do your job better than you and gives him your job

I wish I could convert my bicycle into a snowmobile so it would be easier to go to the store and back  :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: 28BROOK on December 01, 2010, 05:37:31 PM
Granted  but this year there is no snow......

I wish I was at least four inches shorter.

Brook
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on December 01, 2010, 06:07:21 PM
Granted, you're four inches short, unfortunately that's because you have a hunched back.

I wish that I could stay positive and not get depressed at all this month.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: E on December 01, 2010, 06:31:57 PM
Granted - you're now in a fever delirium.

I wish I was 3 years younger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on December 01, 2010, 06:35:21 PM
Granted, you are three years younger.... than the oldest person on the planet...

I wish Ice Cream was healthier
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: E on December 01, 2010, 06:40:04 PM
Granted - ice cream is now the healthiest food on the planet. And it tastes like it, too.

I wish my computer wasn't as temperamental as it is.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Vanessa_yhvh on December 01, 2010, 06:48:55 PM
Quote from: E on December 01, 2010, 06:40:04 PM
I wish my computer wasn't as temperamental as it is.

Granted. Your computer is dead as a rock.

I wish I could play piano better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 01, 2010, 11:24:38 PM
Granted, you can play piano better, but all the pianos in the world suddenly explode in flames.

I wish my iPhone had more space on it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on December 01, 2010, 11:33:09 PM
Granted! Your Iphone has deleted everything so now you have plenty of space.

I wish that everyone who wasn't wishing harm on others or wishing for a bunch of cash could really have their wishes granted
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Vanessa_yhvh on December 01, 2010, 11:36:27 PM
Quote from: Michael Alexander on December 01, 2010, 11:33:09 PMI wish that everyone who wasn't wishing harm on others or wishing for a bunch of cash could really have their wishes granted
Granted. Chaos engulfs the world.

I wish my hair were longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 01, 2010, 11:44:35 PM
You get locked in a tower, and the only way someone can save you is by climbing it.

I wish I had either an infinitely-refilling tea cup or a butler.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Osiris on December 01, 2010, 11:52:56 PM
Granted you can have both! Unfortunately the tea cup fills itself too fast and ends up flooding your house and your butler drowns and the family sues you.

I wish there was less distance between me and people who would most like to erm.. uh, engage in certain activities with me. :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 02, 2010, 05:55:28 AM
Granted, they are all there at once, become insanely jealous, and your house is trashed as they fight.

I wish Haemophilus Influenza A would grow easier when I  put it on an agar plate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 02, 2010, 04:35:43 PM
Granted. It grows very well. But it grows very well inside your lungs, too. Oops.

I wish I could hold in farts as well as everyone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 03, 2010, 05:54:19 PM
Granted. But instead of having the ability to hold them in, you have the ability to suck them back in once you fart, like Peter in Family Guy.  :P

I wish I could see Seattle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on December 03, 2010, 11:14:17 PM
granted! you now see Seattle all the time double-visioned next to everything else you see all day or night.

i wish i had a car
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on December 03, 2010, 11:16:57 PM
Granted you have a car that does not work and just sits outside collecting rust

I wish I had the money to see my doctor
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: E on December 03, 2010, 11:33:20 PM
Quote from: Michael Alexander on December 03, 2010, 11:16:57 PM
Granted you have a car that does not work and just sits outside collecting rust

I wish I had the money to see my doctor
Granted, but you still don't get to talk to him.

I wish my sleep schedule would adhere to society's.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on December 03, 2010, 11:44:45 PM
granted but now society is 3rd shift and only functions at night and you still aren't awake at the right time period.

i wish i knew how me and this woman I'm dating will turn out, whether she'll some day want a relationship with me or with someone else or will just never get over her issue.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 04, 2010, 05:25:04 AM
Granted. You now know that you will marry, and then her 47 member extended family will move in with you.

I wish I had another slice of Chocolate Bavarian.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on December 04, 2010, 02:21:34 PM
Granted, another slice,...and another...and another ....until end of time. You will be wider than the globe and eating another...


I wish for more time with my kids and grand kids.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 04, 2010, 02:36:45 PM
Granted. You are all kidnapped and imprisoned together in a small basement for years.

I wish my otitis would go away faster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on December 04, 2010, 02:38:38 PM
granted : Total ear removal is covered by insurance even, unfortunately it means you are deaf too.

i wish for a small planet sized basement, ( see former wish)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Cruelladeville on December 04, 2010, 03:25:41 PM
Granted: But to get you there NASA have placed you into deep stasis..... and its 25,500 light years away.... what a way to dream though?

i wish for all the peoples of the world to live in harmony and adore fluffy kittens.....eerrgh, bitch-slap to head.... no I don't....

I wish all those on Susan's a very merriment coming Xmas/winter holiday period.... yep that's defo better
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 05, 2010, 04:13:54 PM
We all have the best end-of-the-year ever, but next year....is fantastic too.  (I just don't have the heard to ruin it. :P)

I wish I will never have another period.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 05, 2010, 04:48:00 PM
Granted. You are struck by lightning when you go out and your uterus is destroyed. Unfortunately, so are your kidneys and liver, so you will never leave a hospital room, either.

I wish my co-tenant didn't tell me "I don't give a damn" when I tell her I disagree her taking speed in our apartment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 06, 2010, 01:14:28 AM
Granted, she now gives a damn, but you're the one taking speed.

I wish it was winter break already! I can't take this anymore!  >:(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 06, 2010, 01:18:15 AM
Granted, but it's snowing in florida and people are ice skating on the beach.

I wish I could reverse time and start young again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 06, 2010, 05:57:20 AM
Granted.  You won't make the same mistakes you made last time, you will make different ones.

I wish my ride-on lawnmower wasn't broken.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 06, 2010, 05:40:25 PM
Granted. Your garage door is broken, instead, so you still cannot mow your lawn.

I wish a check I do not remember making did not put my bank account in the minus this weekend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on December 07, 2010, 10:21:11 PM
granted, you now have millions and endless amounts of people are asking you for money round the clock

i wish i had called and started drivers training and called and got an appointment with a gender therapist days no weeks ago. no years ago would have been better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 07, 2010, 10:24:38 PM
Granted. You have called years ago to start training to become a gender therapist and had some pretty deep discussions with a driving instructor. Wait, what ? That's what happens when you do things too fast !

I wish they made an hypocaloric thing that tastes good, fills well and that I am not allergic to.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on December 08, 2010, 08:33:31 PM
Granted.  You are now a rabbit.  Lettuce tastes delicious!

I wish to wake up tomorrow and, when I step on the scale, realize that I have precisely achieved my weight loss goal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 08, 2010, 09:20:21 PM
Granted. You have lost an arm to a maniac overnight. Your weight is perfect, now, though.

I wish people realized my avatar is a drawing made with lipstick, not blood, in the caption thread.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 08, 2010, 11:51:59 PM
Granted, but then people start to wonder why you have lipstick made out of blood.

I wish all of my scars, physical and mental, would go away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 09, 2010, 08:07:12 AM
Granted but you find yourself just being born again having just been swatted on the ass by the doctor making you cry.  Then you hear those dreaded words. "It's a boy!"

I wish I could could make everyone smile today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 09, 2010, 08:28:48 AM
Granted.  You perform some improv comedy at work on your boss' desk.  Ends up he doesn't have the same appreciation for chicken suits and knock knock jokes, and you end up fired.

I wish my bonsai cherry tree would stop being fussy and grow well.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 09, 2010, 08:49:29 AM
Granted ; its growh is excellent... Too excellent. It's no bonsai anymore and you need to find a greenhouse.

I wish I were faster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 09, 2010, 11:47:10 PM
Granted, you are now faster. But once you start moving, you have to keep going at the same speed; you can only speed up.

I wish that I ace all my finals and somehow pass Biology!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 10, 2010, 05:17:08 AM
Granted. You pass all your Finals including Biology with Honours.  You then have a religious Epiphany, and go and live in a cave as an ascetic  hermit.

I wish mangos were less than $3 each.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 10, 2010, 10:26:09 AM
Granted, but they are now harvested by child slave workers to cut costs.

I wish peaches were in season.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 10, 2010, 10:52:22 AM
Quote from: Lee on December 10, 2010, 10:26:09 AM
Granted, but they are now harvested by child slave workers to cut costs.

I wish peaches were in season.

EWWWW  :'(

Granted peaches are in season and you go get a big basket of them. Just as you arrive home the bottom of the basket breaks open leaving you're poor peaches Bruised  >:-)

I wish peaches were in season for you!

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 10, 2010, 06:43:11 PM
Erm... granted? But they all taste like juicy dirt.

I wish I had a supercomputer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 10, 2010, 06:47:59 PM
You are the proud new owner of the Tianhe-1A, but now you have to pay for its upkeep.

I wish hiking didn't hurt my knees.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 10, 2010, 08:08:54 PM
Granted. Hiking hurts your feet.

I wish I did not need any sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 11, 2010, 12:45:11 AM
Granted you do not need sleep. but you are now 12 inches long covered in scales and breath water though gills


I wish it would stop snowing
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 11, 2010, 02:16:22 AM
Granted it stops snowing... everywhere except for wherever you happen to be standing.

I wish I could taste a starfruit.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 11, 2010, 06:26:34 AM
Granted. You have tasted a starfruit and find it so insipid you wonder what all the fuss was about.

I wish I could have back the hour and a half I lost watching "Skyline".
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on December 11, 2010, 12:48:37 PM
Granted, you get that time back at the cost of all the time that came before it...

I wish love didn't hurt so much
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 11, 2010, 03:00:11 PM
Granted. Friendship hurts so much, now.

I wish I could shower in less than 30 minutes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 11, 2010, 03:31:21 PM
Granted You're home now has a star trek style sonic shower that fully cleans you in seconds, it also has a tanning function, automatic hair removal system and heat lamp so you will never be chilled after washing.

How ever, you seem to have lost your keys and can't get into the house :(

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 11, 2010, 10:39:25 PM
Simone, make a wish !
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on December 11, 2010, 10:48:40 PM
Granted... Although Simone forgot to make a wish, by telling her to make a wish you have made a wish for her to make a wish and that wish destroys the world

I wish people were not so destructive
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 12, 2010, 01:23:49 AM
eeek! ok ok!

I wish it were Christmas morning!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on December 12, 2010, 01:29:00 AM
@ Virginia- Wish granted, PEOPLE are not destructive anymore, but now animals are even worse than we were...

@ Simone- Wish granted, it's Christmas Morning, and you get to find out that people were too poor this year to buy you anything

I wish I had gone to bed earlier
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 12, 2010, 02:46:16 AM
Granted, you went to BED earlier, however you were completely unable to sleep.

I wish there weren't so many bootlegged anime figures! (I want to buy my friend a Russia One Cent Grande Hetalia figure, but all the ones I can find are cheap bootlegged copies, and if they're not, they're $30!  :()
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 12, 2010, 05:38:14 AM
Granted.  Because there are no longer any cheap fakes on the market the genuine article now costs $50.

I wish the locust plague infesting this part of Victoria would all get blown into the Tasman Sea.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 12, 2010, 11:40:47 PM
Granted, it moves. But your boss calls you and tells you you either have to move down to the new branch or lose your job. Have fun with the locusts!  >:-)

I wish I didn't wear holes in all my shoes!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 13, 2010, 03:08:00 PM
Granted. Your shoes are holed from the moment you buy them.

I wish I were more mature.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 14, 2010, 01:47:15 AM
Granted, you are so mature you can't even laugh anymore because all jokes are too crude for you.

I wish my finals were over with already!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 14, 2010, 05:22:29 AM
Granted. Unfortunately somebody got caught with the exam papers and you all have to sit all of them again. OIn Christmas Eve.

I wish the locusts caught in the car radiator didn't stink like rotting grass.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 14, 2010, 11:14:21 AM
Granted not only are they Odorless but they now come in 10 amazing colors and 16 new flavors that are Irresistible to large Ravens and M>-bleeped-<ies. So as you drive around town a black cloud of birds follow you swooping down across your cars grill everywhere you go.

I wish for a pet sugar glider for XMass. They are so adorable!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr. Fox on December 14, 2010, 12:00:55 PM
Quote from: Simone V on December 14, 2010, 11:14:21 AM
Granted not only are they Odorless but they now come in 10 amazing colors and 16 new flavors that are Irresistible to large Ravens and M>-bleeped-<ies. So as you drive around town a black cloud of birds follow you swooping down across your cars grill everywhere you go.

I wish for a pet sugar glider for XMass. They are so adorable!

Granted.  But it has no legs or tail, just bleeding stumps.  Also, it has rabies.

I wish my therapist would write me my hormone letters.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on December 14, 2010, 12:18:25 PM
Quote from: Mr. Fox on December 14, 2010, 12:00:55 PM
I wish my therapist would write me my hormone letters.

Granted: your Bovine Growth Hormones will be arriving shortly.

I wish my lips weren't chapped.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 14, 2010, 07:46:44 PM
Granted, your lips are as smooth as a baby's butt (anyone else not need that image?), but everywhere else is chapped. (Ooo... that sounds painful!  :o)

I wish I didn't have to wait until Christmas to get my new computer parts.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rexgsd on December 14, 2010, 08:57:58 PM
okay, they come in the mail tomorrow, but theyre all broken but you still have to pay for them :P

i wish my uncle would let me buy his Oldsmobile off him instead of just letting me borrow it =(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 15, 2010, 04:05:40 AM
Granted, he will let you buy but you can't as you haven't got any money.

I wish good quality shoes came already broken-in.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 15, 2010, 07:06:27 PM
Granted, the shoes are "broken" in. The soles are cracked in several places, and there's holes everywhere else.

I wish I had a cool suit to wear that looked good on me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 15, 2010, 08:40:22 PM
Granted ; you now own a mascot's suit. It really does look cool !

I wish I were not too lazy to do the dishes every day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: glendagladwitch on December 15, 2010, 08:52:23 PM
Granted.  You are now perfectly jazzed about doing dishes, but still too lazy to do anything else.  You manage to eek out a living as a dishwasher, and are happy for time, but then you get replaced by a machine.

I wish that underwear washed itself.  (Yes, I know.  I now wear cats for underwear.)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 16, 2010, 06:11:25 AM
Granted. Your underwear now washes itself, unfortunately it also starches and irons itself.

I wish  I had a canoe.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 16, 2010, 09:15:32 AM
Granted. http://canoe.ca/ (http://canoe.ca/)

I wish I would always be in advance.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on December 17, 2010, 07:34:27 PM
You are... But then you are taken hostage and tied to a mattress in a dingy abandoned building for no apparent reason other than to listen to your captors debate among themselves whether Zebras are actually striped Jackasses or not

I wish I would have started making dinner earlier
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 17, 2010, 10:36:33 PM
Granted ! At 5 this morning you were up and at work ! Unfortunately, your soup turned into gaspacho.

I wish I had a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on December 17, 2010, 11:38:57 PM
Granted, you have a job.... but it's a bank job and you end up arrested and spend 10-20 in penitentiary...

I wish my guy could be with me on New Year's Eve for 2011 =[
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 18, 2010, 05:40:04 AM
Granted. You spend New Year's Eve stuck in an elevator with him. And 14 religious maniacs.

I wish I could spend Christmas with my boyfriend at my family's dinner.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Flan on December 18, 2010, 05:51:17 AM
granted, if you count mcdonalds as dinner.

I wish I was enrolled in med school...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 18, 2010, 06:04:41 AM
Granted, you are enrolled in a medical school in Albania. Unfortunately all instruction is in Albanian.

I wish my nose would stop bleeding so often lately.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on December 18, 2010, 11:26:10 AM
Granted your nose stops bleeding and every thing is fine, except for small case of chapped lips.

I wish we could all find a way to make every ones wishes come true with out such dire consquences!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on December 18, 2010, 12:25:30 PM
Granted, but then it's no longer fun and the thread dies, never to be resurrected.

I wish I wasn't always so tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on December 19, 2010, 01:38:01 AM
Granted, but after being awake and lively for a week you wish you could be tired and sleep just to refresh your brain.

I wish my liver was behaving and other misbehaving body parts were working like they should.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 19, 2010, 04:10:05 AM
Granted.  Your body is 100% functional.  It is also so tired from all the dysfunction that it decides to sleep for a month.

I wish I had a full head of hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on December 19, 2010, 11:37:53 AM
Granted. http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR2SSGSOH454qsebw02gGQ53c6zPJ5--vrDSTj2TvuhKK3iEbPk3A (http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR2SSGSOH454qsebw02gGQ53c6zPJ5--vrDSTj2TvuhKK3iEbPk3A)

I wish I could numb my skin to epilate in peace.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on December 30, 2010, 01:59:47 PM
Granted, but you get distracted and don't realize that you're now missing a good chunk of skin.

I wish I were graduated already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on December 30, 2010, 09:10:09 PM
granted! you graduated 40 years ago.

i wish i had a million dollars
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on December 31, 2010, 03:05:18 PM
Quote from: rexgsd on December 14, 2010, 08:57:58 PM
okay, they come in the mail tomorrow, but theyre all broken but you still have to pay for them :P

Man, this really did happen. The motherboard was broken and now I won't get it until after my winter break is over.  :'(

Quote from: Noah the brave-ish on December 30, 2010, 09:10:09 PM
i wish i had a million dollars

Granted, but the year is 3000 and one million dollars is worth the equivalent of 1 dollar today.

I wish my new computer's motherboard would arrive in the mail today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xAndrewx on January 01, 2011, 01:06:59 AM
Granted! It arrives 5 minutes after someone knocks your computer onto the floor and destroys it.

I wish I could think of something to wish for
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on January 01, 2011, 01:39:27 AM
granted but the genie is all out of wish granting power no that you know.


I wish I could safely teleport wherever I needed to be at low or no cost.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on January 01, 2011, 05:08:26 AM
Granted, but unfortunately the Teleporter only works on humans, not clothes. :o

i wish I could work out what to buy with the $50 gift voucher I got for Christmas.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: pixiegirl on January 01, 2011, 11:48:19 AM
Granted. However what you buy is exactly the same as whats in the box delivered as a late christmas present while you were out shopping with it.

I wish all cheeesy christmas music got erased from existence.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rock_chick on January 01, 2011, 03:08:19 PM
granted, but it's now been replaced with something worse

i wish i had a secret volcano lair
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 01, 2011, 05:12:19 PM
Granted, but Dr. Evil comes and he wants it back.

I wish I didn't have to go back to school on Tuesday.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: some ftm guy on January 01, 2011, 11:17:40 PM
granted, you never have to go to school ever again, you quit.

i wish the woman i like could have been with me over new years...or now and that she wasn't depressed..oh wait that's more than one wish damn.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on January 02, 2011, 02:21:39 AM
Granted and all is cool between you both

I wish (you )was an oscar myer wiener!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Double_Rainbow on January 02, 2011, 02:31:31 AM
Granted, but you'll have to settle with Eckridge....and no weenie mobile.

I wish I could build a turtle fence.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on January 02, 2011, 06:27:45 AM
Granted. The town council give you a permit to build a turtle fence, but it is now illegal to catch turtles.

I wish I had a nice cold beer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Double_Rainbow on January 02, 2011, 07:11:45 AM
Granted, but it is opposite day so you only get a bad, tepid diet Shasta.

I wish this forum had better smilies.   ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tad on January 02, 2011, 06:20:49 PM
Granted. But then people become so addicted to them that they spam the forums with smiley posts.

I wish my dad was more accepting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on January 02, 2011, 06:27:45 PM
Quote from: Rini on January 02, 2011, 07:11:45 AM
Granted, but it is opposite day so you only get a bad, tepid diet Shasta.

I wish this forum had better smilies.   ;D

Granted!  :icon_2gun: :icon_archery: :icon_birthday: :icon_birthday: :icon_blahblah: :icon_bat: :icon_help: :eusa_boohoo: :eusa_clap: :eusa_dance: :eusa_doh: :eusa_drool: :eusa_eh: :eusa_hand: :eusa_liar: :eusa_naughty: :eusa_pray: :eusa_shhh: :eusa_shifty: O0 :icon_pistoles: :icon_poke: :icon_punch: :icon_writers_block: :icon_yikes: :icon_suspicious: :icon_sitonitnrotate-nerd:

Quote from: Tad on January 02, 2011, 06:20:49 PM

Granted. But then people become so addicted to them that they spam the forums with smiley posts.

I wish my dad was more accepting.

I can't grant that but I can offer a hug hansom! 

Granted your Dad suddenly becomes more accepting of you but he starts to demand you join a foot ball team take up hunting and fishing and that you do all future repairs on his car.

I wish I were 25 years younger
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tad on January 02, 2011, 06:33:53 PM
hehe that'd be fine Simone. Already do some of that stuff. XD

Granted, but 25 years younger puts you back into pre transitioned life.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 02, 2011, 11:32:04 PM
You forgot your wish Tad.  ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tad on January 02, 2011, 11:37:41 PM
I wish that my ovaries would fall out. XD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on January 03, 2011, 12:06:18 AM
Granted, your ovaries fall out... of your mouth, followed by your uterus

I wish I could find a job faster

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 03, 2011, 01:32:14 AM
Granted, you have a job; shoveling manure.

I wish my shoulder wasn't hurting really bad.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Double_Rainbow on January 03, 2011, 09:03:10 AM
Granted, you get a shoulder massage to help with the pain.............from EDWARD SCISSORHANDS!!! MWAHAHAHAHA!

I wish I could get my tax refund check already!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 03, 2011, 12:29:00 PM
Granted, it's for $1.

I wish I could have any music album I wanted for free.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: pixiegirl on January 03, 2011, 04:41:02 PM
Granted, but you go deaf later that day.

I wish the world had a working teleport system
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 03, 2011, 04:49:40 PM
The system accidentally teleports itself to another galaxy where curious aliens are beamed to Earth and subsequently destroy humanity.

I wish I weren't terrified about coming out.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Karla on January 03, 2011, 05:21:16 PM
Granted! But after a world apocalyptic event that leaves only you, there's nobody to come out to anymore.

I wish I could have babies.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Double_Rainbow on January 03, 2011, 05:45:54 PM
Granted, you have 11 babies...all with Hugo Weaving's head!

I wish I could play the Sitar.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 03, 2011, 11:04:39 PM
Granted, but for some reason, every time you play, you scream "Dance, water! Dance!" and then 10 copies of yourself made out of water show up and attack you. (Sorry, Kingdom Hearts reference  :P)

I wish tomorrow was Friday.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on January 03, 2011, 11:06:54 PM
Granted, it's Friday but all your plans have fallen through and you now have absolutely nothing to do all weekend

I wish I could understand men better
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on January 06, 2011, 04:08:32 PM
Granted, but now you're one of them, so you can't understand women.

I wish I could loose some weight!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 06, 2011, 04:28:45 PM
Quote from: Mr.Hyde on January 06, 2011, 04:08:32 PM
Granted, but now you're one of them, so you can't understand women.

I wish I could loose some weight!

Granted.  You no longer have any internal organs and will forever be known as boneless Hyde.

I wish I had every single Castlevania and Mega Man game in the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on January 06, 2011, 04:31:24 PM
Quote from: sigmafan on January 06, 2011, 04:28:45 PM

I wish I had every single Castlevania and Mega Man game in the world.

Granted. You have every single Castlevania and Mega Man game in the world, but no system to play them on.

I wish I had a walk in closet.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 06, 2011, 04:40:59 PM
Granted, but you will not have any clothing or shoes or anything in that closet at all.

I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl and a kid, I would call her.  I wish I had rabbit with a hat and a bat, and a '64 impala.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on January 06, 2011, 04:44:55 PM
Quote from: sigmafan on January 06, 2011, 04:40:59 PM
Granted, but you will not have any clothing or shoes or anything in that closet at all.

I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl and a kid, I would call her.  I wish I had rabbit with a hat and a bat, and a '64 impala.

Boooo. I love shoes! Hahaha

Granted: But, the tree of you live in your impala, it doesn't run, and to feed your family you have to eat your rabbit. (PS. My SO sings that all the time. Hahahahaha)


I wish I had unlimited wealth.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 06, 2011, 04:58:21 PM
Quote from: Jacquelyn on January 06, 2011, 04:44:55 PM
Boooo. I love shoes! Hahaha

Granted: But, the tree of you live in your impala, it doesn't run, and to feed your family you have to eat your rabbit. (PS. My SO sings that all the time. Hahahahaha)


I wish I had unlimited wealth.

Granted, but unfortunately it's all in Lira.

I wish I had every episode of WCW Saturday Night & Worldwide.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on January 06, 2011, 09:34:40 PM
Granted. You discover there are more than you think. But you also discover that they did dub these in Finnish.

I wish my job did not consist of repeating the same words over and over.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on January 06, 2011, 09:38:42 PM
Wish granted, however now you can never speak at work again.

I wish that I could start everything from scratch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on January 06, 2011, 09:54:45 PM
Granted. A loan shark comes and informs you that he is about to take away everything you own because of an old debt your old uncle died with. Now isn't this a fresh start ?

I wish I did not have a headache right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Karla on January 06, 2011, 10:16:59 PM
Your wish has been granted, however now for some reason you wish that you did not *not* have a headache, and if that shall come true then you revert back to your original wish in an endless cycle.

I wish I had someone to drive me anywhere and everywhere.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on January 06, 2011, 10:31:14 PM
You do... But they take you anywhere and everywhere they want to go and you just sit bored to death waiting for them to get done

I wish I could eat anything and everything I felt like and gain any weight
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on January 07, 2011, 04:05:47 AM
Granted, but now you have to go to the bathroom just after eat and return everything  :-X

I wish I could sleep an entire week without disturbing...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Double_Rainbow on January 07, 2011, 07:15:13 AM
Granted, you fall asleep in your bed only to have a meteor come crashing down on the very tip of your bed launching you skywards through the hole in the roof.  At the same time a new prototype aircraft is flying over and the velocity at which you are traveling causes the aircraft to get caught in your draft and disassemble.  As you slow down and begin to fall back towards earth, the heat surrounding you melds the prototype aircraft's pieces into something resembling a pod and you crash back down at such a speed, you fly through the earth and into the core of the planet.  The iron and nickel quadruple fuse to become a super hard shell around the pod you are in.  So you finally wake up after a week and freak out because you don't know where you are, but at least you have bits of pilot from the aircraft trapped in the pod to eat.

I wish my neighbors wouldn't fight so loud all the time!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 07, 2011, 10:48:53 AM
Granted, but unfortunately because of a freak accident, you have lost 25% of your hearing and you're unable to hear those three little words that everybody wants to hear....I Love You.

I wish I was back in college graduating with a bachelors degree in broadcast production
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 12, 2011, 06:38:54 PM
Granted, you just got your bachelor's degree in broadcast production, but a new law is passed saying that you can only produce childrens' shows!

I wish I could read whole books in just one hour!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 13, 2011, 12:47:00 AM
Hey, I can make some killer kids game shows. 

You're wish is granted, but unfortunately those books are all written by your least favorite people in the world...mainly Fred Phelps and others.

I wish I had a limitless supply of Diet Pomegranate 7-Up.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 13, 2011, 02:58:59 AM
It now comes out of all of your water taps.  Enjoy your shower tomorrow morning  >:-)

I wish I had more masculine jewelery
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on January 13, 2011, 04:32:00 AM
Granted, but now all the girls wear masculine jewelry so it's now considered femenine jewelry  :angel:

I wish I had a nice suitcase...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 13, 2011, 09:48:05 AM
Granted...But inside is 2 dead skunks & 3 human heads.  Try cleaning the inside of that suitcase out.

I wish for a safe and healthy trip for me to Columbus and Chicago in February.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Karla on January 13, 2011, 09:31:05 PM
Your trip will be indeed safe and healthy since the entire time you will be in an sterile isolation chamber equipped with shock resistant cushions and no internal sharp edges!
(Have a safe enjoyable trip, sigmafan :))

I wish I were able to to unlock the mysteries of the universe.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on January 13, 2011, 10:16:01 PM
You do unlock the mysteries of the universe... But it scares the stuff out of you and you lock it back up again

I wish I wasn't so lonely and full of anxiety and depression
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 14, 2011, 01:24:12 AM
Quote from: Virginia Marie on January 13, 2011, 10:16:01 PM
You do unlock the mysteries of the universe... But it scares the stuff out of you and you lock it back up again

I wish I wasn't so lonely and full of anxiety and depression

Granted, but you're now filled with people who won't leave you the hell alone, who are full of anxiety and depressed.

I wish for a shield, just like Captain America had.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on January 14, 2011, 01:55:23 AM
Quote from: sigmafan on January 14, 2011, 01:24:12 AM
Granted, but you're now filled with people who won't leave you the hell alone, who are full of anxiety and depressed.

I wish for a shield, just like Captain America had.

Granted- except it's made with Lead so it gets recalled.

I wish that I could see the future.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on January 14, 2011, 03:55:00 AM
Granted, but now everyone can do it so the world becomes a super-paranoic place where companies read their customers minds and futures, you have to lock yourself in your home and never go out so you future doesn't become corrupted by Coca-Cola or Apple  >:-)

I wish I was at least 8 or 9 inches taller, without using platform boots...


(Oh and @sigmafan, I wouldn't mind to have a suitcase filled with certain human's heads... that would be the perfect accessory... :icon_weee:)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on January 14, 2011, 05:15:16 AM
Granted, your head is now 9 inches taller you sexy Conehead!

I wish I had a bottle of Red Moscato instead of a Cabernet Sauvignon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 14, 2011, 09:56:26 AM
Granted, but inside that bottle of Red Moscato is Cabernet Sauvignon.

I wish The Black Eyed Peas would quit music right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 14, 2011, 01:02:56 PM
They have now branched out into acting instead.

I wish I weren't out of dolmas.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: R3i on January 31, 2011, 10:43:30 AM
your place becomes full of plates of dolmas which attract raccoons and soon spoil


i wish i had an ipad
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 31, 2011, 12:16:49 PM
Granted, but soon it gets infected by several viruses and it becomes absolutely useless.

I wish I had $10 right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on January 31, 2011, 12:25:58 PM
Granted, $10 confederate. Now you just need a time machine to spend it.

I wish to stay awake and lively until I return from work since I sort of forgot to go to bed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on January 31, 2011, 03:49:32 PM
Granted, but you will FOREVER be awake and lively. No more bed for you.

I wish someone would cook me dinner.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 31, 2011, 04:13:42 PM
Granted, I'm making a salmon salad tonight, and you're welcome to join me.  However, you have to fly to Colorado first.  (You'll also be stuck eating fish in Colorado, which is always a little disappointing.)

I wish I didn't have midterms next week.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on January 31, 2011, 07:56:51 PM
Granted, but you also automatically fail the course, having to retake it again.

I wish for no more Westboro Baptist Church.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 01, 2011, 03:49:11 AM
Granted, they change their name to EastBoro Baptist Church.

I  wish the air conditioner at work  would work properly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 01, 2011, 08:16:22 AM
Granted.  Your newly assigned office in Colorado is blasting AC all day.  Unfortunately it's -13 degrees out this morning.

Next person would like a cup of tea.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Glenn on February 01, 2011, 12:34:27 PM
Indeed I would love a cup of tea.

The next person to post has had a positive thing happen to them today!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on February 01, 2011, 12:49:09 PM
Granted, but in an inverse, you broke your right arm while someone here on the boards finds true love.

I wish Family Guy would get cancelled and Seth McFarlane would quit all forms of entertainment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 01, 2011, 12:56:50 PM
Granted, but it makes Lee sad.

I wish I hadn't slept in so much today.

Quote from: Lee on February 01, 2011, 08:16:22 AM
Next person would like a cup of tea.
I completely mixed up what topic this was.  Sorry folks.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jacquelyn on February 01, 2011, 07:00:30 PM
Granted, from now on you can never sleep past 6am no matter how tired you are or how late you went to bed.  :o

I wish that I could travel the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on February 01, 2011, 07:59:59 PM
Granted, you can travel the world ... by canoe

I wish that I could find a decent-paying job that I would enjoy soon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on February 01, 2011, 08:36:04 PM
Granted,you find a decent paying job that you would enjoy but you must move to Qaanaaq Greenland

I wish i could get the 5 year back log of unfinished projects done
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 01, 2011, 08:55:11 PM
Granted.  You label them all as done and send them off telling people that things will work in a later update.  You now have updates in your "to do" pile and many angry coworkers and/or clients.

I wish I had enough money to move as soon as I graduate.

Quote from: April Dawne on February 01, 2011, 07:59:59 PM
Granted, you can travel the world ... by canoe

Actually, that sounds really fun!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 01, 2011, 11:26:57 PM
Granted, but you only have enough to live in a shack.

I wish I didn't have to constantly fiddle with my shirt to feel moderately comfortable (trying to hide moobs, hips, etc.)  :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 01, 2011, 11:45:08 PM
Granted, but you now have to constantly fiddle to feel comfortable.  Unfortunately, you don't play the violin and are fined for assaulting the public's ears.

I wish I had my cat at my apartment to keep my feet warm at night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michelle. on February 01, 2011, 11:52:59 PM
Kitty GRANTS your humble request by hocking up a hairball on your feet.

I wish I had bigger boobies.

ps... Kitty said that you has best clean up that mess at the foot of the bed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 02, 2011, 03:22:19 AM
Granted, but unfortunately you keep overbalancing, and spend all your time falling on your face.

I wish I had boobs, at all.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: R3i on February 02, 2011, 08:35:10 PM
granted, you now have 2 blue footed boobies which eat you out of house & home

i wish my roommates would stop buying me sushi just because i like anime
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: EliNewGuy on February 02, 2011, 09:16:40 PM
Quote from: R3i on February 02, 2011, 08:35:10 PM
granted, you now have 2 blue footed boobies which eat you out of house & home

i wish my roommates would stop buying me sushi just because i like anime

GRANTED.  But now they make you watch "The Cove" every night. 

I wish I could just bench 135 lbs. already!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on February 03, 2011, 12:59:36 AM
Granted, but then afterwards you can't move for 135 minutes, missing out on mostly everything.

I wish I had a working Dragons Lair Arcade Game.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 03, 2011, 07:00:39 AM
Granted.  All your friends are bored with it and refuse to play, or even visit you..

I wish it was the weekend already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on February 03, 2011, 07:31:37 PM
Granted But its Sunday night 11:59:59 PM

I wish it was Spring already
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: EliNewGuy on February 03, 2011, 07:40:37 PM
Quote from: SarahM777 on February 03, 2011, 07:31:37 PM
Granted But its Sunday night 11:59:59 PM

I wish it was Spring already

It is...in the Southern Hemisphere.  Happy autumnal equinox. 

I wish I could read minds. 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rite_of_inversion on February 03, 2011, 11:36:02 PM
QuoteI wish I could read minds.
Granted. 
You  now hear everyone's thoughts, all of them, awake and sleeping, within a 300-foot radius.  You go insane and retreat to a cave in the wilderness.

I wish I had a better-paying job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on February 04, 2011, 04:19:04 PM
Granted; you have a better paying job, but it's far enough away that the extra pay goes directly into the gas tank, leaving you right back at square one.

I wish I had held my temper today and not yelled at my mom...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SanaMae on February 04, 2011, 04:30:45 PM
Granted but you end up freaking out on someone else.

I wish I had more chocolate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alex37 on February 04, 2011, 05:05:18 PM
Quote from: SanaMae on February 04, 2011, 04:30:45 PM
I wish I had more chocolate.

Granted, but you develop diabetes after eating it all. 

I wish my boyfriend were gay. 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on February 06, 2011, 11:06:08 AM
Granted; your boyfriend announces that he is gay.... and in love with someone else.

I wish I wasn't having such a hard time getting back on HRT
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 08, 2011, 10:25:23 AM
Granted, you testosterone prescription is on the way.

I wish I procrastinated less.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: VeryGnawty on February 09, 2011, 12:34:35 AM
Quote from: Lee on February 08, 2011, 10:25:23 AM
I wish I procrastinated less.

Granted.  You become so efficient that you complete everything almost instantly.  However, only now do you realize how bored you are because there is nothing to do.

I wish my body would feminize faster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Karla on February 09, 2011, 04:45:25 AM
Sure enough it does, and then you become a fashion model and get hooked on heroin.

I wish all the red tape is permanently eliminated...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on February 09, 2011, 04:59:01 AM
Granted, now there is neon green tape everywhere.  >:-)

I wish my iPad had infinite battery.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 09, 2011, 05:32:41 AM
Granted. It does this by remotely sucking the charge out of all the batteries in the vicinity, phone,tv remote, car,radio, iPod....

I wish politicians were not such a bunch of wankers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: kyle_lawrence on February 19, 2011, 09:50:47 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on February 09, 2011, 05:32:41 AM
I wish politicians were not such a bunch of wankers.

granted. there are no longer any politicians. The world is now a single nation in a constant state of anarachy and chaos.

I wish for the conversations I have with my cat to be less one sided.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Janet_Girl on February 19, 2011, 09:59:20 PM
Granted.  Not only do you understand your cat but the cat understands you.  But you no longer can speak anything but cat.

I wish I lived in my girlfriend's country.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 20, 2011, 05:13:38 AM
Granted, you are now a citizen of Jeblovia, she however, has just emigrated to Canada.

I wish my holidays started today instead of next weekend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 21, 2011, 11:29:02 PM
Granted, your holiday starts today. However, your boss calls you in to work, and tells you that if you don't come, you're fired.

I wish I could get all the books I ever wanted for free.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 21, 2011, 11:59:22 PM
Granted, but everyone you know hates you when they find out you're the Library Bandit.

I wish my apartment were self cleaning.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: R3i on February 22, 2011, 08:47:30 AM
Granted, your apartment becomes self aware and expels all your things out the window leaving it spotless.

I wish i were a cat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: QuestionMark on February 22, 2011, 09:00:48 AM
Quote from: R3i on February 22, 2011, 08:47:30 AM
Granted, your apartment becomes self aware and expels all your things out the window leaving it spotless.

I wish i were a cat.

Granted, you are now a cat. Unfortunately for you, your a cat infested with flees and about to be eaten by a giant pitbull.
I wish for unlimited wishes
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Hyde on February 23, 2011, 04:44:59 AM
Wish granted, but with every wish you make, a close family member or friend will slowly fall into illness towards death with no chance of recovery.

I wish I would sleep at regular hours so I can wake up early everyday.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 24, 2011, 05:29:10 AM
Granted, however in an Existentialist epiphany you decide that you don't care what the day is like and so go back to sleep for an extra hour every morning.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 24, 2011, 07:21:36 PM
I sense a forgotten wish!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on February 24, 2011, 07:47:11 PM
Granted... You now have sensed that there are two forgotten wishes and now the Sith lords are hunting you because they think you've become a Jedi Knight

I wish people would not forget to wish their wishes  ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 24, 2011, 10:46:24 PM
Granted, no one forgets to wish their wishes... but you forget every time.  :laugh:

I wish I wasn't being pressured to go to a baby shower.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Karla on February 24, 2011, 11:14:36 PM
Granted. You'll never attend a baby shower again, but you'll have to bathe them every day when they get old! ???

I wish I could unsee what I had seen.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 24, 2011, 11:34:38 PM
 ??? ...Granted, you never saw it. But now you will wonder for the rest of your life what it was (like the rest of us).

I wish I automatically got A's in all my classes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 25, 2011, 06:13:03 AM
Granted, however there is not much demand for people with a Master's in Navel Gazing, or Basket Weaving.

I wish I didn't have to work an extra shift tomorrow, and could start my holidays a day earlier like I was supposed to.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 25, 2011, 06:00:48 PM
Granted you don't have to work tomorrow, but you get snowed in and your heater breaks.

I wish I didn't have to mow the lawn.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 25, 2011, 06:41:57 PM
Granted.  You now have a sheep that wanders your lawn, keeping it nice and short.  However, your lawn is now covered with sheep droppings, which is against your HOA regulations, and you receive a hefty fine.

I wish I could find my lemon grass tea.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 25, 2011, 08:45:17 PM
Granted, your house is now filled to the brim with lemon grass tea.

I wish I could go to a 3 Doors Down concert.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 26, 2011, 06:36:56 AM
Granted, your tickets entitle you to a seat behind a large concrete pillar.

An Existentialist might or might not make a wish, for something or nothing, and they might also forget to mention it or perhaps not care whether they mentioned it. It's likely they would consider the chances of a wish being granted as problematical or of no consequence in the face of life's absurdity...
I wish I could understand Existentialism, or just speak French....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 26, 2011, 11:54:26 PM
Granted, you understand Existentialism, and French, but you no longer understand anything else.

I wish I had a magical storage shelf that could hold and infinite number of items.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on February 27, 2011, 03:39:02 PM
Granted.  It even comes complete with a three-headed guard dog.  However, as you are not musical in any way, shape, or form, you can never get into it.

I wish I could get the chat on this site to work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on February 27, 2011, 07:17:18 PM
Granted, but there's nobody to talk to....

Iwish I had some Monster or Burn to drink right now...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on February 28, 2011, 05:30:11 AM
Granted, but you won't drink it because you have realised it gives you 147 decibel flatulence. :o

I wish my son would return my Whipper Snipper (aka weed whacker/strimmer/line trimmer).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on February 28, 2011, 07:52:18 PM
Granted, but he gets angry at your request and stabs you with it.

I wish my teachers would stop segregating us for activities by gender.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on February 28, 2011, 11:30:09 PM
Granted.  Now they segregate you by height, and it could get hairy.

I wish I had a glass of Diet Pepsi right next to me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on February 28, 2011, 11:36:58 PM
Granted, but that glass of diet pepsi belongs to the person sitting next to you and they dont want to share.

I wish it was 85 degrees out where i live right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 01, 2011, 12:09:27 AM
Granted.  However, due to a mix up in immigration, you are deported to the south pole.

I wish I had a longer attention span.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 01, 2011, 04:51:59 AM
Granted, you are now monomaniacally obsessive about whatever you are doing at any given time.  Your friends all desert you, and your family move you into a shed in the backyard.

I wish I had 3 weeks holiday instead of just 2.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 01, 2011, 05:45:48 PM
Granted, you spend your 3-week holiday with the protesters in Libya.

I wish that my family will get the house we want! :eusa_pray:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 02, 2011, 05:38:16 AM
Granted, but you also have to spend the rest of your lives paying off the mortgage like the rest of us.

I wish someone would come up with a cheaper way to get a house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: VeryGnawty on March 02, 2011, 06:36:26 AM
Quote from: justmeinoz on March 02, 2011, 05:38:16 AM
I wish someone would come up with a cheaper way to get a house.

Granted.  Someone offers to sell you a house for next to nothing, so you buy immediately.  When you read the fine print, you realize they were only selling an outhouse.

I wish I weren't so tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 02, 2011, 08:16:53 AM
Granted: you find yourself with solid wooden wheels instead. Bumpy, but rustic.

I wish I were a tenor or a bass, and not a baritone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 02, 2011, 04:47:24 PM
Granted, your bass is so low, it shakes buildings even if you're just speaking. After destroying 4 different buildings, you are required by law never to speak again. And then all the people who know sign language die. Sorry.

I wish I didn't hate all my friends right now.  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 02, 2011, 04:51:20 PM
Granted: you "like" all your friends on facebook, get appalling carpal tunnel from all the mouse-clicking and can't masturbate for a year and a day.

[just so's I can say: I always wanted to be Black Bolt - he's so cool!]

I wish my new house was ready to move into NOW.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 02, 2011, 05:31:12 PM
Granted.  Your house moves into now and keeps moving until it reaches the future.  You, unfortunately, are still stuck in the now.

I wish I had time to lie down for a bit.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: espo on March 02, 2011, 09:09:06 PM
Granted: but I was in the same room telling you about all the really weird dreams I had in the smallest of detail

Wish I had 20 boxes of Pop-Tarts
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on March 02, 2011, 09:23:25 PM
Granted... You have the last twenty Pop - Tarts boxes... But they are all empty

I wish I would have kept my 1982 Volkswagen Vanagon
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 02, 2011, 11:50:01 PM
Granted, but it's permanently parked in your living room.

I wish I had my driver's license already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 03, 2011, 04:18:39 AM
Granted. You then go out to celebrate, and lose it for drink-driving.

I wish the wine in the cask was better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 03, 2011, 10:02:14 AM
Granted: the wine in the cask gets well, but now you have strep throat.

I wish I could sleep through a whole night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 03, 2011, 06:11:46 PM
Granted, you are well rested every morning. However, no one else can sleep anymore, so they are always pissed off at you.

I wish my friend would stop losing her phone every ten seconds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 04, 2011, 03:34:44 AM
Granted: Kazam!! your friend stops being a goldfish :).

I wish the nearest loom I want wasn't a 6-hour round trip away!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mr.Hyde on March 04, 2011, 04:52:50 AM
Granted, now it's just 25-hour away! :)

I wish my Tiger Balm was infinite!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 04, 2011, 05:06:45 AM
Granted, however the price is also infinite!

I wish I  hadn't almost torn my thumbnail off pruning a tree this morning. :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: VeryGnawty on March 05, 2011, 01:11:55 AM
Quote from: justmeinoz on March 04, 2011, 05:06:45 AM
I wish I  hadn't almost torn my thumbnail off pruning a tree this morning. :'(

Granted.  You didn't "almost" tear your thumbnail off.  You completely tore it off.

I wish I had more bread without having to drive to the grocery store to get some.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 05, 2011, 04:43:00 AM
Granted: your dwelling place is engulfed by a vast squid eating dough in a polyethylene bag. It is fast and bulbous.

I wish my beard was non-existent.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 05, 2011, 04:53:01 AM
Granted. You now have a beard's worth of hair growing in each ear.

I wish there was something decent on TV tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rejennyrated on March 05, 2011, 05:01:36 AM
Granted. There are back to back previously unaired episodes of all your favourite shows. Unfortunately there is a major power outage in your area and you cant watch them.

I wish I had a rewarding job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 05, 2011, 05:06:19 AM
Granted, you have a rewarding job as a nurses aid in an Nursing Home, as O/C Bed Pans.  Your self-sacrifice is appreciated by all the other staff, who wouldn't dream of taking such an uplifting duty from you!

I wish I had stopped at 2 pancakes at dinner tonight!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on March 06, 2011, 02:01:01 AM
Granted, you stop at 2 pancakes, only to spend the rest of the night wishing you had eaten more, so you finally do but just before bedtime, which gives you nightmares and an upset stomach... =]

I wish I wasn't depressed and could get motivated again
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 06, 2011, 02:58:37 AM
Granted. Godzilla appears out of thin air and starts chasing you, and this motivates you to run like hell for 5 hours. After he catches you, he bites your head off, and since you're dead, you no longer have feelings!

I wish I could fly.  ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 06, 2011, 05:14:30 AM
Granted, You are now a Pacific Black Duck. Unfortunately you live on the edge of a lake and it's Duck Season Opening tomorrow.

I wish I hadn't run out of coffee. >:(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 06, 2011, 09:53:30 AM
Granted: you run out of the nearest Dunkin' Donuts instead, and collide with a giant inflatable cheese, causing you to spill your coffee and donuts all over the head of John the Baptist, which happens to be in the carpark selling Lebanese hash to tourists. Chaos ensues, it's all over YouTube before you can say Jill Robyndaughter.

I wish my housemate hadn't come home yet!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: r e m on March 06, 2011, 09:58:17 AM
Granted; but your housemate was struck by a subway train and died instantly - now you have to cover the rent on your own. O:

I wish it was tomorrow night already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 06, 2011, 04:04:26 PM
Granted, but earlier that afternoon you were hit by a truck, so now you have to spend 2 weeks laying in a hospital bed while covered in a full body cast.

I wish I had skittles.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 06, 2011, 11:26:23 PM
Granted, someone gives you a bag of Skittles. But you eat one, then realize they are actually M&Ms in a Skittles bag.

I wish I didn't feel like my weekends go by in two seconds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 07, 2011, 05:03:02 AM
Granted, they are now so boring they feel like they last a week, and you can't wait to go back to work.

I wish Krispy Kreme donuts didn't taste like deep fried sugar, just donuts.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 07, 2011, 05:08:44 AM
Granted...kshsmshtinkleronronronronronron... oh, sorry, you crashed my wish granter :). Hold on, rebooting (set BIOS to ignore sugar)...

Granted: your donuts are made using pure aspartame. You grow an extra penis, on which you hang those inedible damn things as a warning to others. (Heh - Krispy Kreme Zero...)

I wish I didn't feel like sleeping and exploding at the same time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 07, 2011, 09:13:46 PM
Granted, you don't feel like sleeping or exploding, but your Wish Granter crashes again and causes you to experience both.

I wish I didn't have an "end-of-the-year" project due three months before school ends (i.e. this week).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 07, 2011, 09:18:39 PM
Granted, you now have an End of Term Project due LAST week.

I wish I hadn't pulled a muscle in my side unrolling a rug! :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: r e m on March 08, 2011, 12:48:32 AM
Granted, instead you were rolled INSIDE the rug and thrown off a bridge at midnight!

I wish I had something fun to do.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 08, 2011, 05:59:56 PM
Granted, you now have to help me with my end-of-the-year project that was apparently due last week. Isn't it fun?

I wish I didn't feel depressed all the time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 08, 2011, 07:32:40 PM
Granted, I didn't feel depressed all the time.  You, however, did.

I wish my back would heal enough to go to salsa this week.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 08, 2011, 08:26:03 PM
Granted, but now both your legs are broken. (Too predictable? :P)

I wish the world was free from hate.  :angel:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: VeryGnawty on March 09, 2011, 09:17:15 AM
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 08, 2011, 08:26:03 PM
I wish the world was free from hate.  :angel:

Granted.  As you walk around town and observe everyone, you realize that the only emotion they display is dispassionate indifference.  They are like living zombies.

I wish I had more pizza.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 09, 2011, 09:23:11 AM
Granted, but you have to fly to Colorado and raid Lee's fridge.  It is, overall, the most expensive leftover pizza you've ever had.

I wish my exams were spaced out more.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 09, 2011, 01:23:17 PM
Granted: your exams do a whole load of coke, get so spaced out they wake up in a whorehouse in Turkey.

I wish I'd slept last night before driving for 7 hours!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 09, 2011, 07:47:20 PM
Granted, you slept for 1 minute, then had to get up and drive more.

I wish I had cake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 09, 2011, 09:06:55 PM
Granted, but the cake is a lie.

I wish I had a glass of milk.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on March 09, 2011, 09:24:29 PM
Granted... But milk is lying also

I wish I had more energy to clean my apt. for tomorrow's inspections  :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on March 10, 2011, 03:15:13 AM
Granted... but the inspections a lie :p

I wish my interview Monday would end with me getting the job
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on March 12, 2011, 05:25:41 PM
Granted: You get the job, but it has poor pay and the conditions are terrible.

I wish that I could be king of the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 12, 2011, 07:25:38 PM
Granted, but when you introduce yourself as "I'm the king of the world" for the first time, you end up on a big ship that hits an iceberg and sinks.

I wish I were feeling better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 13, 2011, 12:40:37 AM
Granted you feel better immediately, but now everyone around you feels terrible, and they constantly bitch and moan at you for feeling good.

I wish my sister wasn't such an idiot.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 13, 2011, 05:20:06 AM
Granted. She is now some other kind of idiot.

I wish the rain had held off until the Carnival at the local GLBTIQXYZ Festival had finished.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 13, 2011, 05:41:20 AM
Granted: but even without the rain, the weight of all those letters still brought the giant umbrella crashing down, injuring many beneath it. But then the rain fell, soothing their wounds and some other poetic crap I can't be bothered to come up with.

I wish I had some different colours for my cotton warp today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 13, 2011, 05:46:04 AM
Granted, you have all the colours of the rainbow. Your cotton is however so badly warped it is unable to be straightened. :laugh:

I wish our plague of crickets would go away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on March 14, 2011, 06:20:08 PM
Granted, your plague of crickets is taken care of by a plague of spiders.

I wish the next person would grant me a GOOD wish :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on March 14, 2011, 06:24:11 PM
Granted, I get to prank you as many times as I like. Good, you say? Well, it's good for me.  ;D (Sorry.  :P)

I wish mailing things wasn't so annoying.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on March 14, 2011, 06:58:46 PM
Granted, it's no longer annoying... it's infuriating, you have an anurism, and die..... (that's for screwing up my wish lol)

I wish I could meet a really nice guy that would treat me with respect and not just want to treat me like a sex toy...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on March 14, 2011, 07:07:06 PM
Granted, but he's gay.

I wish I had a glass of orange juice.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on March 14, 2011, 07:26:20 PM
(since I still have a penis, gay might not be an end-all, just saying)

Granted, you have a glass of orange juice that's been sitting on the counter for three months.

I wish I hadn't had to stop HRT
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on March 14, 2011, 10:29:05 PM
granted, but the estrogen gives you a blood clot.

i wish i could overcome pure o. (purely obsessional obsessive compulsive disorder.)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: r e m on March 15, 2011, 04:55:18 AM
After many long years, you finally do..but at a celebratory get-together, all your guests are mowed down in front of your eyes by a runaway snowplow. you are sent into a deep relapse.

i'm wishing that I get hired at the job I'm applying for tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 15, 2011, 05:13:40 AM
Granted: you are hired, but fired the same day for mowing down some people with a snowplow.

I wish my hip would stop aching.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 15, 2011, 06:20:42 AM
Granted. It is now frozen solid after you fall in a snow drift escaping a homicidal snowplow driver.

I wish it would snow here so I don't have to wait forever for a new ice rink to be built.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on March 15, 2011, 06:23:15 AM
Granted: a wild Jake Gyllenhall ice-age film appears, and you die from projectile vomiting at the godawful sentimentality of it all.

I wish my raddle had arrived today, instead of some bloomin' clothes catalogue.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Juliet on April 01, 2011, 01:16:09 AM
Why did this awesome thread end?  Is it because I'm not the only one who doesn't know what you mean by raddle and therefore can't properly corrupt it?

I wish I knew what he meant by "raddle"
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 01, 2011, 01:26:11 AM
Granted. (I don't know what he meant either.  :D Please enlighten us, yoxi.) He misspelled "rattle", so you give him a baby rattle and he tries to kill you with it.

I wish I hadn't burnt the bottoms of my feet today. (long story...  :()
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CosmicCandi on April 01, 2011, 01:32:28 AM
Granted.  Your feet did not get burned, instead they melted, albeit painlessly. 

I wish I could start my hormones soon so I can start feeling like the real me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 01, 2011, 02:00:28 AM
granted, but they make you very hungry all the time, and you gain 50 pounds.

i wish my breasts weren't feeling so sensitive right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on April 01, 2011, 02:33:23 AM
Granted.  Your breasts turn to lead.  The sensation no longer bothers you, but the extra weight gives you back problems.  Also, you know, nobody likes to play with lead.

I wish I hadn't watched the Doctor Who episode "Blink" right before bed. *shudder*
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: fleshpull on April 01, 2011, 02:41:12 AM
Quote from: Lee on April 01, 2011, 02:33:23 AM
Granted.  Your breasts turn to lead.  The sensation no longer bothers you, but the extra weight gives you back problems.  Also, you know, nobody likes to play with lead.

I wish I hadn't watched the Doctor Who episode "Blink" right before bed. *shudder*



Granted, there is no more Dr. Who.

I wish I had a Supercharger for my Acura NSX
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Juliet on April 01, 2011, 03:57:15 AM
Granted, but you get the supercharger in exchange for the Acura itself


I wish I had a normal human sleep schedule


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: angiejuly on April 01, 2011, 04:09:54 AM
Quote from: Juliet on April 01, 2011, 03:57:15 AM
Granted, but you get the supercharger in exchange for the Acura itself


I wish I had a normal human sleep schedule
Granted, Now you are up all night like the rest of us wishing you could sleep.

I wish I was a wasle wooooo on a backwards train.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 01, 2011, 04:13:48 AM
Granted: now you're doomed to go ooch ooch* for all eternity.

I wish my ears were smaller :(

(*which of course isn't choo choo backwards, but oohc oohc looked wrong ::))
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 01, 2011, 06:49:51 AM
Granted, they are so small you can no longer wear glasses, or sunglasses.

I was going to was that my Lab Manager would resign, but she did and we are going to be privatised as well.

I wish I had a Sprintex Supercharger for my 86 Honda City micro car.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on April 01, 2011, 06:55:52 AM
Granted, but unfortunately, the Sprintex Supercharger was meant for the 1987 Honda City Micro Car and your car gets damaged beyond repair.

I wish I had tickets to go to Wrestlemania 27 this weekend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 01, 2011, 07:13:08 AM
Granted: you get ringside seats and get steam-ironed by a falling heavyweight.

I wish I'd already moved house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on April 01, 2011, 03:49:22 PM
Granted but the house you move into is really dirty
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Flan on April 01, 2011, 03:59:04 PM
I wish I knew how to type english
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 01, 2011, 03:59:38 PM
Quote from: LukeW on April 01, 2011, 03:49:22 PM
Granted but the house you move into is really dirty
...so long as it's my kind of dirt ;)

I wish you'd written a wish...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Flan on April 01, 2011, 04:00:57 PM
Quote from: yoxi on April 01, 2011, 03:59:38 PM
I wish you'd written a wish...
granted, but I just lost mine

I wis... see above
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 01, 2011, 04:04:28 PM
["don't cross the posts!"]

Granted: you are able to type "English", but every other word has a 50/50 chance of ending up in Klingon.

I wish I could get to sleep tonight (this is getting repetitive).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 01, 2011, 06:23:47 PM
granted, but you get kidnapped in your sleep and thrown into a lake.

i wish the waitress at the restaurant i was at today didn't call me "he" just because she thinks my parents have no daughter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on April 02, 2011, 05:11:02 AM
Granted: But she now thinks you have no parents.
I wish I could have all of the torchwood episodes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 02, 2011, 06:03:11 AM
Granted. You now have a full set of 'Torchwood'.  On Beta video cassette.

I wish my whipper snipper (weed-whacker/strimmer) hadn't run out of line before I had got started on the weeds in the garden.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: angiejuly on April 02, 2011, 02:15:07 PM
granted but you can no longer weed wack because the spindle flew off bounced off a tree and knocked you out.
I wish the waves where bigger today
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 02, 2011, 02:24:13 PM
granted, but another tsunami strikes and destroys your home.

i wish i knew what i'm doing, lol.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 02, 2011, 02:28:34 PM
Granted: you know what you're doing, but in true quantum spirit, you have no idea where you're doing it.

I wish I had some black cotton yarn to go with my white yarn.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 03, 2011, 08:22:00 AM
Granted, you have black yarn, but it is a foot shorter than you need.

I wish I had a bottle of Champagne, and a gorgeous lady to share it with.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 03, 2011, 02:57:57 PM
Granted, but she drugs your glass and runs off with your wallet.

I wish my IPod Touch could get wi-fi everywhere instead of being limited to hotspots.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on April 03, 2011, 03:07:01 PM
Granted... But now people only call when your on the potty

I wish I lived near the beach again
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on April 03, 2011, 05:34:44 PM
Granted: But you live so near that every time the tide goes in your house floods.
I wish I didn't stay up late nearly every night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on April 04, 2011, 12:49:44 AM
Granted; you no longer stay up late, you stay up until it's time to go to work (or school) again.

I wish a Crow movie could be made that would actually match the first in content, emotion, and tone while still being good rather than being a pale and lifeless rip-off.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 04, 2011, 06:04:21 PM
Granted. You get your very own DVD of The Crow that is exactly the same as the first one. Only difference is that in this version, someone filmed the TV while the store-bought copy was playing ;D

I wish I had some pizza from pizza hut.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 05, 2011, 01:11:38 AM
Granted: Pizza the Hut catches you trying to free Han Solo and chains you up in a gold bikini.

I wish I wasn't seeing double (damn you, eye muscles!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 05, 2011, 07:33:12 AM
Granted, you now see everything out of focus.
I wish I had a jam sandwich.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 05, 2011, 05:24:59 PM
Granted, but it's strawberry jam. (Which I think is disgusting, lol)

I wish i didn't have such broad shoulders.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lord of the Dance on April 06, 2011, 03:00:42 AM
Granted — you lose both your arms and shoulders in a horrendous motorcycle accident.

I wish my boss would actually pay me!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 06, 2011, 03:05:39 AM
Granted: your boss pays you in chocolate money, you develop diabetes.

I wish my warping mill would arrive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 06, 2011, 07:44:33 AM
Granted, your warping mill arrives, but is too big to get through the door.

I wish I knew what on earth a 'warping mill' was!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on April 06, 2011, 09:53:30 AM
Granted,but your boss pays you in fake money.
I wish I had more clothes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 06, 2011, 05:30:16 PM
Granted, your house is stuffed to the brim with clothes that don't fit you.

I wish I had a 3DS.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on April 07, 2011, 01:39:43 AM
Granted, but you find it broken when you open the box. And you didn't keep the receipt. d:

I wish my neck wasn't so stiff.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 07, 2011, 01:53:51 AM
Quote from: funson on April 07, 2011, 01:39:43 AM
Granted, but you find it broken when you open the box. And you didn't keep the receipt. d:

I wish my neck wasn't so stiff.
Granted: but now you need a neck brace all the time to hold up your head.

I wish I was a waitress.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 07, 2011, 02:06:20 AM
granted, but you're a waitress at the texas roadhouse, and people throw peanut shells at you.

i wish my cat would shut up.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Padma on April 07, 2011, 02:14:58 AM
Granted: your cat becomes a ninja and disappears to Albuquerque*.

I wish my packing was finished.

*why not? It's fun to type. And a known hotbed of ninja activity.

PS: I wish I knew what on earth a 'warping mill' was!

Warping Mill 2 - Speeding up! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yx1G_r7_zJ8#)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on April 07, 2011, 10:07:10 AM
Granted, but when you actually do get finished and moved, you actually forget some important, private stuff to you and it's left there for the new residents to see.

I wish that World Championship Wrestling was still alive to this date.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 08, 2011, 10:31:54 PM
Granted: but the wrestling uniforms have all been changed to Bozo the clown cosplays.

I wish my network hadn't blocked this site.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 08, 2011, 11:26:36 PM
Quote from: Tesseract Allen on April 08, 2011, 10:31:54 PM
Granted: but the wrestling uniforms have all been changed to Bozo the clown cosplays.

I wish my network hadn't blocked this site.
Granted: every network server has been shut down and the internet is dead.

I wish my customers would stop throwing peanut shells at me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 08, 2011, 11:38:31 PM
Granted: they now throw the entire nut instead.  Such a waste.... :-\

I wish I was lost three inches hight wise.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 09, 2011, 12:28:42 AM
granted, but the modeling agent that would've booked you as a model now is not interested since you are too short.

i wish i wasn't so stressed out about having to get ready for a vacation.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 09, 2011, 07:21:20 AM
Granted. You are now on vacation and stressed about going back to work.

I wish it wasn't raining.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alex37 on April 09, 2011, 10:43:37 AM
Granted.  The sun comes out, and you get a 3rd degree sunburn.

I wish I had more money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 09, 2011, 05:44:33 PM
X
Quote from: Alex37 on April 09, 2011, 10:43:37 AM
Granted.  The sun comes out, and you get a 3rd degree sunburn.

I wish I had more money.

Granted: you are one cent richer than when you asked.

I wish I was fluent in every lanuage that is and was ever spoken on earth.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 09, 2011, 06:01:26 PM
Granted, but the only thing you can say to people are sexual variations of the same phrase that involve their mothers.

I wish I could come up with more wishes that didn't involve junk food. T.T
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 09, 2011, 09:22:42 PM
Granted: Now junk food doesn't exists, it's been replaced by Just Plain Garbage TM.

I wish I had enough money to get my HRT Refferal letter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on April 09, 2011, 11:10:47 PM
Granted:  But your provider won't pay for your meds and now you have to pay for your meds.

I wish I didn't have to worry about funding for college.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 10, 2011, 12:07:29 AM
Granted, you get a full scholarship for clown college.

I wish I had a bigger bookshelf.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 10, 2011, 12:13:24 AM
Granted: but all you books have turned to bad fanfiction.

I wish I had  a superpower.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 10, 2011, 06:15:33 AM
Granted.  It's called the USA, and decides to annex your country.

I wish my boobs would grow now I have been on hormones for 2 days!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 10, 2011, 05:26:11 PM
Quote from: Tesseract Allen on April 10, 2011, 12:13:24 AM
Granted: but all you books have turned to bad fanfiction.

I wish I had  a superpower.
Granted: you super power is that you can make the titties grow of the first person that asks. And then all your powers are used up.

Justmeinoz:
Granted: your titties start to grow and never ever stop growing because the super power that was used will remain in effect forever(that's why they call it SUPER)

I wish I never had to eat, drink, pee, or poop again to sustain my life.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 10, 2011, 07:02:07 PM
Granted, but you are now really susceptible to viruses, and you die of the common cold the next day.

I wish I could read books really fast.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 10, 2011, 07:57:44 PM
Granted: but now everyone calls you 'Johnny 5'

I wish you didn't just remind me of Short Circuit.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 10, 2011, 08:00:46 PM
Granted.  You are now reminded of War And Peace, and talk non-stop for 17 days at a time. (movie felt like it was that long).

I wish my ever expanding boobs would shrink.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 10, 2011, 08:45:50 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on April 10, 2011, 08:00:46 PM
Granted.  You are now reminded of War And Peace, and talk non-stop for 17 days at a time. (movie felt like it was that long).

I wish my ever expanding boobs would shrink.

Granted: in addition to tesseract's superpower, you find that your titties have an amazing regenerativve power that let's you cut them off daily after which they continue to grow again. With the freshly lopped off tissue you are able to feed 1/3 of the population of france each day. However, you are forced to live in france as a troglodyte and johnny depp sends you vile presents every day as compensation.

I wish I could reincarnate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 11, 2011, 08:12:06 AM
Granted. Quick get the shotgun, it's Tiger Snake!

I wish the weekend would get here sooner.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 11, 2011, 08:49:22 AM
Granted, It's the weekend everyday!!! Unfortunately that means billions of people no longer can work their 9-5 weekday jobs. Everyone goes hungry.

I wish I had some perfume I liked.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 11, 2011, 06:22:29 PM
Granted, but you are now allergic to it.

I wish that I'll win the sweepstakes I entered (the contest ended today; waiting anxiously to see the winners! But I've never won anything in my life...  :-\).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 12, 2011, 01:39:09 AM
Granted. The prize is a rabid Chihuahua with sharpened teeth. It's nonrefundable.

I wish that all my stupid online homework were done.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 12, 2011, 02:29:52 AM
Granted: your homework is complete but you didn't learn anything from it and there's a test tomorrow that counts for 50% of your grade with no extra credit given for the course.

I wish diapers weren't so messy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 12, 2011, 07:48:13 AM
Granted. They are now messier.
I wish I didn't have to get up early tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sfem on April 12, 2011, 08:32:03 AM
Granted. You lost your job.

I wish political parties would leave my internet alone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 12, 2011, 10:46:30 AM
Granted! But now they won't leave your home, you have the BlockQuebequa in your bathroom screaming "WE WILL SUSSEDE!"

I wish I was moved already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 12, 2011, 10:55:13 AM
Granted. Say hello to your multiple squeaky disease-carrying roomates! They're too large for mousetraps.

I wish that my piercings would heal quicker.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 12, 2011, 11:00:45 AM
Granted, now the heal so fast that the peircings are absorbed in to your skin.

I wish I had a a peanut butter,hot sauce and ham sanvich!
Actually now that I think about it,  I have the ingreedeants...I can re...wait, just build it!!!

Okay, I changed my wish.

I wish I had a cybernetic body.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 12, 2011, 11:27:08 AM
Granted. You are now a Cyberwoman, with no emotions and very few weaknesses. Say goodbye to your loved ones, you'll be the one destroying them.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fsandalsandsocks.typepad.com%2Fphotos%2Funcategorized%2Fcyberman2.jpg&hash=dde27b49eb8534ecbc7864d347289bac7e1fb086)


I wish I weren't so sleepy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 13, 2011, 12:23:34 AM
Granted: you meet Dr. Who who places you in a perpetual time tunnel, whenever you get tired you are immediately taken back to a time when you were not tired. You live forever but accomplish nothing while doing everything over and over again!

I wish I was 100% ambidexterous and had the ability to use my feet and toes as well for many tasks that I can currently only perform with my hands.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 13, 2011, 12:38:27 AM
Granted. Unfortunately, you are also now a quadriplegic.

I wish that my brother would stop wandering around the house with no purpose. We don't have a big enough house to wander in, and it stresses me out.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 13, 2011, 12:57:18 AM
Granted. Now he has a perpous in wandering, he wants to run a hole in the floor around your room which eventually drops through a hole in the ground to the firy pits of magma below.

I wish I was a kung foo action ninja star.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 13, 2011, 08:37:10 AM
Granted, you now have a typecast role as a baddy who gets beaten up by the star.
I wish I didn't have to shut down and go to bed so I can go to work in the morning, having just got home.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 13, 2011, 02:41:02 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on April 13, 2011, 08:37:10 AM
Granted, you now have a typecast role as a baddy who gets beaten up by the star.
I wish I didn't have to shut down and go to bed so I can go to work in the morning, having just got home.
Granted: you just got transferred up to japan and now have a sleep tube at work so you only go home on Friday nights whereby you never have to wake up early upon arriving home.

I wish people would put as much thought into granting my wishes as I put into granting theirs ;-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on April 13, 2011, 04:04:39 PM
Granted... Everyone thinks so long and hard about what to reply and wish for that it takes forever and a day to reply to your posts

I wish I belonged to a site that actually lends support to transgendered people
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 13, 2011, 04:44:24 PM
Granted, but a mod accuses you of posting naked pictures of yourself and you get a perm ban. I wish I had an enter bar on my iPod Touch. :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 13, 2011, 04:49:54 PM
(Not sure exactly what you mean, but...) Granted, you have an enter bar on your iPod Touch, but your Touch breaks the next day.

I wish I was passing my classes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 13, 2011, 05:18:22 PM
You notice how there's no big space separating my grant and wish? It bothers meh :3 and granted but you have to do all of your teachers dirty laundry for a year. I wish a flight from Los Angeles to Taiwan was shorter than 13 hours -.-
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 13, 2011, 06:50:03 PM
(Oh, I see. Touches are designed like Macs; "enter" is called "return". Being a PC user, that doesn't really make sense to me, but the return button is in the lower right of the keyboard, and it does the same thing. So unless you don't have any touching abilities in that corner or something, it should work.)

Granted, the flight takes only 1 hour, but you end up in Timbuktu instead of Los Angeles.

I wish I had an excuse to wear dress shirts and ties more often.  :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 13, 2011, 10:03:57 PM
Quote from: Dante on April 13, 2011, 06:50:03 PMI wish I had an excuse to wear dress shirts and ties more often.  :P
Granted, you are dead and have been stuffed into a suit and tie for your funeral. Now you can wear it forever!

I wish that I had some ice cream.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 14, 2011, 05:29:37 AM
Granted. You now have 47kg of "no-flavour-whatsoever" ice cream.
I wish I could drink more than 3 glasses of wine without getting drunk.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 14, 2011, 05:38:17 AM
Granted: you never have to worry about being drunk again because you're now drunk all the time! Have fun!!

I wish I had InstaRamen making powers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 14, 2011, 05:40:42 AM
Granted. You can no longer go near the Asian food section of the Supermarket as the packets spontaneously cook.
I wish I could afford better wine than 'Chateau de Cardboard' ($12 cask).  ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 14, 2011, 11:30:07 AM
Granted. You are evicted from your apartment/your house is repo'd. No more rent/mortgage payments to worry about, buy all the wine you want!

I wish someone would bring me coffee, I don't want to get out of bed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 14, 2011, 11:56:22 AM
Granted, but they spill it all over you and you have to get up anyway, and now your bed's wet too.

EDIT:I wish I actually read my posts before posting!!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on April 15, 2011, 12:23:55 AM
Granted, but now you read very slowly, one word every 10 minutes. By the time you're done, someone else has posted and you have to correct your posts.

I wish I had a unicorn for a companion animal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on April 15, 2011, 03:15:20 AM
Granted: but when the feds find out you're jailed for life for harboring an exotic endangered species and they confiscate the unicorn in an attempt to clone it in the future.

I wish I could get back to sleep every time I need to after I wake up after 4 1/2 hours.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 15, 2011, 05:23:28 AM
Granted. You get back to sleep for all of 10 minutes. Afterwhich you can't get back to sllep at all.

I wish I had another job to go to , because I am sick of being overworked, underpaid, and unappreciated in the one I do now!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 15, 2011, 11:12:31 AM
Granted! You now have my job, where they randomly drop shifts on you and your hands are in water all day!

I wish I could tell if I'm kidding myself that my peotry is good...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on April 15, 2011, 02:32:35 PM
Granted, you are now the world's greatest poetry critic. Historically clever rhyming schemes pale before your scrutinous eyes. Unfortunately, you've lost the ability to appreciate anyone else's poetry along the way..

I wish I already had the money from selling my mountain bike.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 15, 2011, 09:38:43 PM
Granted, but you have an ovewhelming earge to buy a random bike of the same ammount gained, thus nullifying any profit! Oh, and you get ripped off as well...

I wish I wasn't having a hell of a hot flash for the past few hours.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on April 16, 2011, 12:20:18 AM
Granted. Instead you are freezing cold and shiver so bad you can't competently perform any task.

I wish I didn't have to go shoe shopping tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 16, 2011, 01:34:17 AM
Granted. You don't have to shop for shoes. You have to shop for everything else.

I wish I wasn't exhausted from transplanting trees.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 17, 2011, 01:00:14 AM
Granted. You're now exhausted from transporting a fat, sweaty old man on your back.

I wish couldn't get tired, and could stay up all night. ;D (Ty for tip Dante :3)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 17, 2011, 02:27:34 AM
Granted. You now stay up all night, and sleep all day. Your friends now call you Drac.

I wish there were heaps of jobs around here so I would have something to go to when I resign my current one tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on April 25, 2011, 09:30:42 PM
Granted. But they're all snapped up by refugees and prestigious university graduates, so you just waste a lot of time.

I wish joining Katimavik this July.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on April 25, 2011, 10:48:30 PM
Granted, but the organization is actually a ring of slave drivers in disguise. You now have to 'volunteer' for 8 months.

I wish it was 5 years from now. >.>
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xxUltraModLadyxx on April 25, 2011, 10:59:11 PM
granted, but 2012 strikes, and all of humanity dies.

i wish i wasn't so stressed out.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on April 26, 2011, 01:26:14 AM
Granted, you now are completely relaxed....maybe too relaxed.....Oh goddess stop relaxing! THE MUSCLE IS BECOMING SO RELAXED IT"S MELTING OFF THE BONE!!!

I wish I had written a wish before posting instead of after.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tom on May 08, 2011, 01:35:54 AM
GRANTED! You posted a wish before instead of after but in order to do so you had to invent a crazy box that you didn't quite understand but you only knew you could transport yourself through time. But not like cool time. Real time. So you created doubles of yourself because you couldn't decide what to wish for. SO NOW there is a CRAZY ARMY OF FIFTY OF YOU!

I WISH I haaad a lollipop. ^^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 08, 2011, 07:38:37 AM
Granted. You had a lollipop, it was garlic flavour and you are still tasting it 4 hours later.

I wish someone had bought the car i had advertised this weekend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on May 08, 2011, 02:30:27 PM
Granted but befoe you could deliver you end of the sale some one steals the car, drives it off of a cliff, fills it with gasoline, hacks it apart with a katana, then lights it on fire and dives it in to the sea. Oh and then aliens take the leftovers and throw them in to a room with ten starving people as a science experinmet.

I wish I got an acceptance lette from a publisher.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on May 10, 2011, 02:35:56 AM
Granted, but unfortunately for you it's for Hustler Magazine and wants to see some more pictorals from yourself before hiring you.

Somehow I wish I hadn't just typed that out, due to fear of reprocussions.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on May 10, 2011, 04:53:20 AM
Granted, but you end up typing something else so vulgar that nobody will let you write ever again.

I wish I had someone to cuddle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 10, 2011, 07:27:07 AM
Granted. Sigmafan is there to be cuddled, now if you only had proper arms and hands.

I wish I had ordered a different dish for dinner at the Thai restaurant Thursday night and avoided an "out-of-stomach experience". :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on May 14, 2011, 03:21:36 AM
Granted, instead of ordering a nausea-inducing meal, you order one that makes you instantaneously break out in awkwardly itchy hives!  :-X


I wish my glasses weren't so tight on one side, it's giving me a headache.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 14, 2011, 07:07:37 AM
Granted.  They are now a perfect fit, but are faulty and make you wall-eyed.

I wish it hadn't been so cold when i rode down to Melbourne today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on May 19, 2011, 09:20:17 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on May 14, 2011, 07:07:37 AM
Granted.  They are now a perfect fit, but are faulty and make you wall-eyed.

I wish it hadn't been so cold when i rode down to Melbourne today.
Granted. You're placed back in time and on your way to Melbourne the temperature raises to 23C but your car breaks down resulting in a four car pileup behind you. Then while at the chiropractors office later he places you in traction and says that for the next two weeks you need to take ice baths to ease the pain of the whiplash til you recover.

I wish my sheets, clothes, house, car, and body never got dirty.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 19, 2011, 10:11:54 PM
Granted... None of your stuff gets dirty, it just gets dusty because you're in the traction bed next over because you were in one of the four cars that piled up

I wish I didn't have to get surgery on my shoulder
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: RabbitsOfTheWorldUnite on May 19, 2011, 10:30:08 PM
Granted.
Your situation is so dire and unique that not a single surgeon will dare to touch it for fear of a malpractice suit that's sure to follow. But then you discover a witchdoctor who lives at the delta of the mississippi who cures you without surgery. However, the cost for each of his cures is to be ridden with one of his plentiful curses. You're a cute girl though, so he selects a more pleasant curse: now you have 6 long cat-like whiskers growing from your cheeks. And your shoulder is now more flexible, stronger, and more beautiful than ever!

I wish we could change not just our gender, but our species as well.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on May 19, 2011, 10:54:59 PM
:O That one's better let's go with it.

Granted but Species Reassignment Surgery isn't covered by insurrance.

I wish my grandma, in her youth, would've made a video like this for me.

I Am Your Grandma (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfY1lfFu8j8#ws)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 20, 2011, 07:39:20 PM
Granted, but you see it as a child, and you are so traumatized by it, you develop a phobia of grandmothers.

I wish that our moving sale tomorrow will go well.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on May 21, 2011, 04:32:56 AM
Wish granted, but it goes so well that you have sold all your furniture that you were going to move in your new house with.
I wish I could have food magically appear when I want it to.  ;)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Gingertrap on May 21, 2011, 04:41:17 AM
Granted, but all of your teeth have been removed due to a horrible gum disease which makes chewing on anything extremely painful. You now must receive your nutrients intravenously.

I wish I had elf ears!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on May 21, 2011, 08:00:23 PM
Granted, you permanently transplant your human ears for elf ears. Unfortunately they're the plastic kind and now you can't hear or feel vibrations from music and such! ):


I wish I had more work experience so that I could get a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanW on May 22, 2011, 04:41:59 AM
Granted, but you get so much experience that they tell you can't get the job because your too experienced.
I wish I could afford a binder.>w<
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 22, 2011, 06:50:59 PM
Granted, a wad of money magically floats down from the sky, but as soon as it touches your hands, everything in your house breaks. After paying for all the damage, you are exactly where you were before.

I wish my English project was already done!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on May 22, 2011, 07:59:53 PM
Granted. *sets your finished project on fire* >:-)

I wish Netflix streaming wasn't such a ripoff.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on May 22, 2011, 11:49:20 PM
Granted, but they then raise the prices of all the rental prices, it becomes impossible to go through netflix.

I wish that Game Show Network would air more older game shows such as Sale of the Century and Scrabble.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 23, 2011, 12:15:33 AM
Granted, all the new game shows are phased out of existence.

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on May 22, 2011, 07:59:53 PM
I wish Netflix streaming wasn't such a ripoff.

I wish Netflix streamed English subbed anime instead of English dubbed.  :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Gingertrap on May 23, 2011, 12:29:50 AM
Quote from: Dante on May 23, 2011, 12:15:33 AM

I wish Netflix streamed English subbed anime instead of English dubbed.  :'(

Granted, but the only available anime is Naruto, Pokemon, and Dragon Ball Z.

I wish I didn't have to write two essays for my English comp II class.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 23, 2011, 06:18:23 PM
Quote from: Gingertrap on May 23, 2011, 12:29:50 AM
Granted, but the only available anime is Naruto, Pokemon, and Dragon Ball Z.

FUUUUUUUUUU!  :icon_censored:
:P  ::)

Anyway, my annoyed ranting aside. Granted, you only have to write one, but it has to be 10 times as long as the original two papers.

I wish that I will pass all my classes for the semester.  :eusa_pray:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 26, 2011, 04:43:01 AM
Granted.  But your course is rendered obsolete before you finish, so you have to re-enrol in something else.

I wish I could find a leather skirt in any of the shops around here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on May 26, 2011, 01:14:28 PM
Granted, but it's too short and it shows off ample amounts of your butt and other things.

I wish to be a better human being than I am right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on May 26, 2011, 03:50:22 PM
Granted, you grow another functional arm. Now everybody's making fun of you. ;D

I wish I had cheerios.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 26, 2011, 04:32:02 PM
Granted... You now have a new mental illness that has been named Trista's Cheerios which causes you to constantly smile and wave and say "Cheerio" to everyone you talk to

I wish healing from the surgery on my shoulder wasn't quite so painful  :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alex37 on May 28, 2011, 10:37:15 PM
Granted... you contract leprosy, can't feel a thing, and die in a leper colony

I wish it were easy to quit smoking cigarettes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 29, 2011, 01:07:02 AM
Granted, it's really easy to quit. Unfortunately it's even easier to start again.
I wish I was motivated to do housework today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on May 30, 2011, 03:14:40 AM
Granted, now you have extreme OCD.

I wish I didn't have to come up with a wish everytime I granted someone else's wish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alex37 on May 30, 2011, 07:20:21 AM
Granted, now you want everything in the world and are never happy

I wish college was free.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alasdair on May 31, 2011, 03:00:15 PM
Quote from: Alex37 on May 30, 2011, 07:20:21 AM
Granted, now you want everything in the world and are never happy

I wish college was free.


Granted! College is free but you have to go naked and all the seats are vinyl!

I wish my girlfriend wasn't so messy!

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on May 31, 2011, 05:08:00 PM
Granted, she leaves you and now the mess is entirely yours making her not messy.

I wish that all of my student loans were paid.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 01, 2011, 04:13:12 AM
Granted, but then the cheque bounced, and the Fraud Squad want to play 20 questions.

I wish that my breast forms would stop trying to fall out of my bra.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on June 01, 2011, 03:26:05 PM
Granted. They don't try and fall out of your bra, they succeed in falling out of your bra.

I wish my earbuds would stop breaking after 2 months of use!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 01, 2011, 03:40:48 PM
Granted, now they are always broken when you buy them, so now they're useless from the start.  ;D

I wish I never had to go through the ordeal of carrying my heavy ass woodshop project home just now. -.-
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on June 01, 2011, 03:56:43 PM
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 01, 2011, 03:40:48 PM
Granted, now they are always broken when you buy them, so now they're useless from the start.  ;D

Well, at least I can take them back right away.  :D

Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 01, 2011, 03:40:48 PM
I wish I never had to go through the ordeal of carrying my heavy ass woodshop project home just now. -.-

Granted. You had to go through the ordeal of carrying your even more heavy ass metalshop project home.

I wish I would find $100 on the ground as soon as I walk outside my door.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 01, 2011, 04:02:22 PM
Granted, but then this cop sees you pick it up, and since it was technically outside your house, he goes "RAWR THAT'S THEFT!!!" and then he puts it in his pocket and sends you to jail for like 2 hours cause he's new didn't know what else to do with you.

I wish I had a pony! :D That shot deadly laser beams out of it's eyes. >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on June 02, 2011, 12:28:14 AM
Granted, but it shoots laser beams at you whenever you try to ride it.

I wish I can lose over 100 pounds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 02, 2011, 02:58:36 AM
Granted, you move to the UK and lose your wallet.

I wish the rotten headache I have had all day would go and infest a Family First Senator instead!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 04, 2011, 06:30:01 PM
Granted; the rotten headache dissolves only to be replaced by a fresh headache.

I wish ... for ... a shrubbery!!!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: sigmafan on June 04, 2011, 08:37:45 PM
Granted, but the shrubbery continues to say NI! all through the night, annoying you and any houseguests you would have in the future.

I wish I had not gotten the reference.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 04, 2011, 08:53:23 PM
Granted; you didn't get the reference, therefore my wish goes uncorrupted... er.... thanks.

Anyone else wanna corrupt my shrubbery?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sephirah on June 04, 2011, 09:10:42 PM
Erm... okay...

I'll grant your wish, but it's a Shrubbery from Northrend... far far away from Zangarmarsh... and too cold to do anything with other than stare blankly at it. :P

I wish my knee didn't itch. >.<
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on June 05, 2011, 12:24:01 AM
(SHRUBBERY!!!)  ;D

Anyway...
Granted, your butt itches instead.

I wish I was playing paintball right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 05, 2011, 02:46:05 AM
Granted, but you are caught in the open with no paint left!

I wish the wine cask wasn't so empty!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 05, 2011, 12:09:50 PM
Granted: while you weren't looking someone topped it off with water thinking you'd never notice.

I wish my fingernails would stop tearing and splitting so easily.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 06, 2011, 11:01:18 PM
Granted. They are now as hard as steel and have to be cut with an angle grinder.
I wish it would stop raining and blowing a gale so I can paint outside.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on June 07, 2011, 12:54:41 AM
Granted, but you find out that all of the siding has blown off your house.  You have to put up new ones and spend your time painting that instead of something fun.

I wish for a hug.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Gingertrap on June 07, 2011, 01:51:44 AM
Granted. However, you find yourself in the middle of a sumo wrestlers convention on free-hug day.

I wish I had a better job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 07, 2011, 03:10:40 AM
Granted. You have a better job, but the increase in pay is less than the increase in your tax.
I wish 60 second drying nail polish lasted more than a couple of days.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 07, 2011, 05:14:04 AM
Granted: It lasts forever, and causes your fingers to rot away
I wish I could wake up tomorrow and have a man;s body (no joke but why not have fun with it?)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 07, 2011, 05:16:34 AM
Quote from: April Dawne on June 04, 2011, 06:30:01 PM
Granted; the rotten headache dissolves only to be replaced by a fresh headache.

I wish ... for ... a shrubbery!!!!

ROFLMFAO were you refering to what I think you were?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 07, 2011, 06:29:06 AM
Granted. You now have a man's body in the lounge room and the Homicide Squad want to play 20 Questions!

I wish I wasn't coming down with a cold.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 07, 2011, 02:47:55 PM
Granted: It is not a cold, but you are pregnant
I wish that I could meet Shania Twain, one of my greatest inspirations.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 07, 2011, 03:12:59 PM
Granted, but she's a bitch in person.

I wish I could shuffle. ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 07, 2011, 08:29:38 PM
Granted. You can now shuffle, but they won't let you play because you always trump your partner's aces.

I wish the real estate rep would turn up to do the valuation on the house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 07, 2011, 09:17:04 PM
Oops I meant shuffle dancing lolz

Granted but right when she's at the door you trip and make a large hole in the wall somehow.

I wish I could grow my hair out at will.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sephirah on June 07, 2011, 09:21:56 PM
Granted, but Will gets the fright of his life at the sudden appearance of a mass of hair approaching him.

I wish there were no more sunny days. Ever.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 07, 2011, 09:23:15 PM
Granted, but your hair grwos out as large worms and they never go away.
I wish that I could find enough help to go to veterinary or psychology school
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 08, 2011, 12:06:30 AM
Granted. Someone gives you a lift to Moscow Veterinary College.
I wish my chest looked more like my avatar's.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on June 08, 2011, 02:15:29 AM
Granted, but your face now looks more like my avatar's.
I wish my AC were quieter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 08, 2011, 03:08:23 AM
Granted: it doesn't work at all
I wish that I could take a better pic of myself
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 08, 2011, 02:21:14 PM
Granted; you can take a better pic of your foot....

I wish one of the jobs I applied to recently would hire me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on June 08, 2011, 07:06:56 PM
Granted, you get hired. Then you spill hot coffee on your boss the next day and you're fired.

I wish my dad would stop telling me to try harder without actually caring to ask what's wrong.  :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 08, 2011, 09:52:10 PM
Granted: He asks you what is wrong, then just hugs you and walks off as you tell him. (Sorry but I couldn't totally corrupt it. Reminds me of my mom)
I wish that my step brother's testicles would rot off as he sits in jail and pays for what he did.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on June 09, 2011, 03:24:17 AM
Granted, he rots in jail for whatever it was he did. When he gets out, he regrets whatever he did, and begs for forgiveness, but you are unable to forgive him, and you become old and bitter. (wow, that was kinda emo  :-\)

I wish I could read, write, and speak Japanese fluently.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 09, 2011, 03:33:27 AM
Granted, but unfortunately Japanese becomes a dead language 5 minutes later.

I wish I passed my Algerbra II final. :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 09, 2011, 06:02:46 AM
Grante, but as you did Algebra 2 last year and Algebra3 this year it is no help whatsoever.

I wish my new hairpiece would stay in place better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HonestReflections on June 09, 2011, 12:02:18 PM
Granted: But it stays attached to your chin, making a very disturbing-looking beard that you can't shave no matter what you try to do.
I wish these samll-town biggots would shove their comments up their penises.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on June 09, 2011, 01:44:30 PM
Granted, but they make so many bigoted comments that it becomes the new trend in penile enlargement.
I wish my cell and molecular bio class were shorter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 10, 2011, 07:29:08 AM
Granted, your cell is shorter. So short that you can't sleep comfortably.
When they let you out to do the Molecular Bio class you fall asleep in class, despite it only lasting 20 minutes.

I wish the Winter Fashion Parade at the shopping mall had lasted longer than 5 minutes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 10, 2011, 03:27:54 PM
Quote from: HonestReflections on June 07, 2011, 05:16:34 AM
ROFLMFAO were you refering to what I think you were?

Why yes.... yes I was  ;D

Granted; the Winter Fashion Parade lasted six hours and was such a smash that it was impossible for you to get in to see any of it.

I wish I had some pistachio ice cream.....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 12, 2011, 01:47:18 AM
Granted... You had some pistachio ice cream and now you want more

I wish this world didn't stress me out so much
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 12, 2011, 02:29:55 AM
Granted, now instead of getting stressed out, your brain will just explode into little pieces.

I wish Bruce Lee magically came back to life and looked the same as he did 40 years ago. (Way of the Dragon is playing on TV right now, lolz)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 12, 2011, 06:54:28 AM
Granted, he also has to explain to the Police why he faked his own death, and where the insurance money went.  He gets 20 years!
I wish  there had been a few other transwomen at the dance party I attended.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tesseract Allen on June 12, 2011, 03:55:20 PM
Granted, but all the music suddenly turns to what souns like random Yodeling through a tin can, then you find out someone blocked the doors with really heavy boxes.

I wish I had rocket boots.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 13, 2011, 04:43:34 AM
The music did sound like yodelling through a tin can! Total Rock and Roll bypass!

Granted, you have rocket boots and they embed you in the lounge room ceiling while you are showing off.
I wish I could get an avatar photo to upload! Help!!! :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 13, 2011, 05:03:34 AM
Granted. :D

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi260.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fii34%2FSteve-o_094%2Fpossiblyasiancatlady.jpg&hash=c7c2ce402d767a153f2bd5973c0cd12b3472fe2d)

I wish I had a magical flying dolphin named Ralphy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 13, 2011, 06:32:41 AM
Granted, you did. But he took one look at that and shot through.

I wish I was visible again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 13, 2011, 03:09:14 PM
Granted: you become visible only to realize it's just as bad as you feared, making you wish to be invisible again.

I wish I could find it in me to be positive again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on June 14, 2011, 07:25:55 PM
Granted, you put rays of sunshine and rainbows to shame. Unfortunately everyone else is so negative in comparison it brings you down again.

I wish I hadn't cried during my first therapy session.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on June 14, 2011, 08:45:32 PM
Granted, instead you vented by punching your therapist in the face.

I wish I was an international super spy bent on stopping baddies from blowing up the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on June 14, 2011, 08:51:38 PM
Granted, but you are legally obligated to wear a bowtie everywhere.  This sounds cool until you realize how much of a pain it is to shower and sleep in one.

I wish for infinite wishes. 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 14, 2011, 10:57:04 PM
Granted... You now have infinite wishes... But now you feel overwhelmed and can't decide what to wish for

I wish power outages wouldn't occur just as I'm typing an email response
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 14, 2011, 11:20:56 PM
Granted: they now happen just as you are about to read your email.

I wish I had more motivation.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on June 14, 2011, 11:59:13 PM
Granted, you're so motivated you solve every crisis in the world today. Then, without anything productive to do, you are bored to death.


I wish I had some gelato!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 15, 2011, 01:10:00 AM
Granted.  You have a double cone of Anchovy and Broccoli flavour. Enjoy!

I wish the Health Insurance agent hadn't stuffed up and put my Mother's name instead of my new name on my membership, meaning I have to go and see them again!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: A on June 15, 2011, 01:14:23 PM
Granted. They put your father's name instead. Happy birthday.

I wish I would have the incredible luck to have noticeable bone changes with HRT.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jo on June 15, 2011, 01:28:55 PM
Granted, too bad those bones were in your ears. And yes, they are very noticeable.

I wish that there was no such thing as illness.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on June 15, 2011, 02:18:26 PM
Granted, the word disappears and suddenly people have no idea what's wrong with them or how to fix it.

I wish we had the chance to buy tickets for the last shuttle launch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 15, 2011, 08:04:38 PM
Granted  You are given the chance to buy unused tickets for the last shuttle launch but it is 6 years after the fact and you can only bid for them on Ebay.


I wish i could find a way to slow down my hyper active kitten
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 16, 2011, 06:10:18 AM
Granted. The Vet prescribed Cat Valium. It now spends all day lying on it's back with a silly look on it's face.
I wish it had not been so cold in Melbourne today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Anon on June 17, 2011, 02:27:53 PM
Granted, instead it was 120 degrees and everyone skipped work to go surfing, leaving the city completely unattended.


I wish I could find someone to do my homework for me!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Gingertrap on June 19, 2011, 01:02:50 AM
Granted, but the 6 year old who did your homework wrote boobies for every answer and you were suspended for lewd behavior.

I wish my estrogen dose was finally increased.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on June 19, 2011, 01:07:37 AM
Granted; your estrogen is increased, but now your anti-androgens are off, requiring more bloodwork to sort it out.

I wish the next person's wish would go uncorrupted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: R3i on October 06, 2011, 07:23:13 AM
granted, but a time paradox occurs and the universe is destroyed

i wish my roommates's puppy would stop trying to bite me
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 06, 2011, 10:31:17 AM
Granted. Your roommate's puppy is now a grown dog. That still bites you.

I wish I could think of something to wish for.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 06, 2011, 04:56:10 PM
Granted, I'm gonna choose for you, and I say that you wish for a muffin. *steals muffin* ^.^

I wish I was a smurf, and I lived in Smurf Village with all my smurf friends.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: bballshorty on October 06, 2011, 05:02:42 PM
Granted, but all your smurf friends left you for me because you're a lazy smurf.
I wish I can grow taller.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 06, 2011, 09:19:18 PM
You're now 14 feet tall and can't get through most doors.

I wish Steve Jobs came back from the dead to lead a zombie army in a war against Microsoft.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 06, 2011, 11:14:54 PM
Granted, but Microsoft wins.

I wish that this Corrupt-a-Wish thread will stay open for a long time!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 07, 2011, 05:10:06 PM
Granted, but now everyone's corrupted wishes happen to you as well.

I wish I could save 15% on car insurance.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amaranth on October 07, 2011, 10:31:46 PM
Granted, but now a talking gecko bugs you all day long.

I wish marijuana was finally legalized.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michelle. on October 07, 2011, 10:47:36 PM
Granted. However your locale goes even further than the Dutch. Your weed contains Negative 10% THC.
check out the BBC for the article

I wish for a Sugar Daddy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 07, 2011, 10:56:37 PM
Granted.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1225.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee398%2Fbarry_robinson2%2Foldman.gif&hash=ffa22e9c979143a501488bd9c03fdd379e66ae85)

I wish I could physically stick my tongue down my throat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 08, 2011, 12:32:00 AM
Granted, but then your tongue decides that it wants to be soul mates with your esophagus, and leaves your mouth and never comes back, saying that your mouth never loved it like your espohagus could.  (Wow, apparently sleep deprivation aids in the corruption of wishes!  Huzzah!)

I wish my girlfriend were here with me.   ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 08, 2011, 01:46:53 PM
Granted, but her ex-lover is, too.

I wish The Sims Social didn't make you build everything you buy. X(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 08, 2011, 07:31:54 PM
Granted, but now everything costs real money :P. And it costs twice as much if it already DID cost real money!

I wish my feet weren't so big >:(.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 08, 2011, 07:38:15 PM
Granted, but now your feet are so small you need a magnifying glass to trim your toenails.

I wish I had a pet rat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 08, 2011, 07:59:21 PM
Granted, but it's a male and it pisses everywhere it goes. And I mean everywhere. Oh, and it likes to get ornery with your hand.

I actually used to own rats, so did my sister :). I'm not joking about males pissing everywhere they go, though :(.

I wish that when I died my wish to have my casket dropped out of a flying airplane while on fire right into my funeral plot would come true. Apologies if that takes a while to digest.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amaranth on October 09, 2011, 03:14:30 AM
Granted, but the fire spreads before it's dropped and brings the plane down.

I wish Justin Bieber would hit puberty.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 09, 2011, 03:48:16 AM
Granted, but his new breasts turn out to be really hairy.

I wish Susan's was more active.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amaranth on October 09, 2011, 04:13:54 AM
Granted, but it's invaded by an army of trolls and haters.

I wish I could climb the tree in my backyard without getting poison ivy rash.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on October 09, 2011, 04:16:15 AM
Granted.  The tree is poison ivy free, but the rest of your yard is covered in it.
I wish I weren't becoming nocturnal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 09, 2011, 06:20:45 AM
Granted, you now stay awake all the time.
I wish I could drink more than 3 glasses of wine before I started to feel seedy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 09, 2011, 01:08:53 PM
Granted, but then you build such a high tolerance that you can't feel 'seedy' even if you wanted to.   >:-)

I wish annoying people came with a 'mute' button.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on October 09, 2011, 03:24:01 PM
Wish granted.

But it only works for 30 seconds by pressing their belly button

I wish I had a plane that turns into a robot. ( been watching a lot of Macross this week)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Walter on October 09, 2011, 03:42:10 PM
Granted. You now have a plane that turns into a robot..but it doesn't turn into just any robot, it turns into a Decepticon

I wish I didn't have ovaries
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 09, 2011, 04:19:03 PM
Granted, but then you somehow magically turn into an octopus.   :laugh:

I wish I could think of something to draw/paint right now.  ???
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on October 09, 2011, 05:08:00 PM
Granted!

You can now think of something to draw or paint. But your only medium available is on a 1 inch X1 inch scrap of paper and a purple crayon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michelle. on October 10, 2011, 12:17:17 AM
I wish that Keaira had left a wish for me to corrupt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 10, 2011, 12:48:20 AM
Granted. Congrats! You just caused a paradox.

I wish weekends were three days instead of two.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amaranth on October 10, 2011, 12:53:32 AM
Granted, but now we all work less and make less money and the economy somehow sh*ts itself.

I wish I had a flask that refills itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on October 10, 2011, 02:15:36 AM
Granted.
you now have a flask that will refill itself. But it only refills with stale root beer.

I wish I had been born with a female body.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amaranth on October 10, 2011, 02:20:45 AM
Granted...but you are now an FTM.

I wish my speakers didn't get ruined when I assaulted them with Bassnectar.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on October 10, 2011, 02:30:42 AM
Ouch! well corrupted! :D

Your wish is granted, but they burn out the next day from an unexplained power surge that also takes out your TV.

I wish there was no discrimination against anyone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Vee on October 10, 2011, 02:56:42 AM
Quote from: Keaira on October 10, 2011, 02:30:42 AM
I wish there was no discrimination against anyone.
Granted, we're all smurfs now


I wish I wasn't so lazy today

p.s.Awesome thread.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 10, 2011, 03:13:29 AM
Granted, you are now a workaholic.

I wish my right breast was the same size as my left.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 10, 2011, 03:14:59 AM
Granted... You are now totally flat chested

I wish I could snap out of this melancholy state of being that I'm trapped in
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on October 10, 2011, 03:28:52 AM
Granted you can, and do.  Now everyone wants to know what the **** you are grinning for all the time.

I wish it was a nice day tomorrow so I can ride the new bicycle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on October 10, 2011, 05:24:43 AM
granted. it's 180 degree's outside and will be for the next 6 months with not a cloud in sight.

I wish I was a professional artist.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 10, 2011, 07:35:01 AM
Granted. You get a magic paintbrush that makes you the best artist in the world, but when you sleep your art comes to life and goes on murderous rampages. But at least you get paid! Well, until your art kills the people that pay you.

I wish I could lose weight faster!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 10, 2011, 08:19:00 AM
Granted. You now lose weight with every move you make. But it will never stop (until you wither away to nothing!)

I wish I could sleep all through the night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 10, 2011, 02:37:49 PM
Granted, Godzilla bites your head off too, so you're also dead. ;D

I wish my guitar tuned itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 10, 2011, 08:14:02 PM
Your guitar gains the power to tune itself, as well as everything else. It tunes itself, it tunes a piano, it even tunes a fish (buh dum, SHING!), but when you play a note wrong one day, it's magic tuning power tries to tune you! In the process your vocal chords are mangled and ripped apart so that you can only make guitar sounds with your mouth for the rest of your life. On the bright side, you could make a lot of money because of this! Well, you could if the government ever lets you leave their testing area after thinking you were some type of advanced life form with an advanced language.

I wish work wasn't so boring! >:(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 10, 2011, 08:24:34 PM
Granted, you are given the most interesting job in the world! But then the person you inadvertently stole the job from comes and tries to kill you.

I wish that I will be able to go to college where I want.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 12, 2011, 02:07:15 PM
Granted, but then you lose all memory of where you used to live and are now lost. 

I wish my house plants could talk to me.  I always wonder what they're thinking, if they can think.   ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 13, 2011, 12:11:35 AM
Granted, your plants now talk to you. But now they have minds of their own and proceed to take over your house with vines. Your house ends up looking like something out of Jumanji.

I wish I could break the 4th wall whenever I felt like it.  :laugh:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Felix on October 13, 2011, 01:45:20 AM
QuoteI wish I could break the 4th wall whenever I felt like it.  :laugh:

Wait, are you an actor? Well okay, but since that's messing with reality, reality melts, and you never find out if it's just you or if the whole world is broken.

I wish I had my own bedroom.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 13, 2011, 08:12:14 AM
Granted, but due to a mix of ghosts and it being locked from the outside, you can never leave it.

I wish...I wish...I was a fish!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 13, 2011, 10:05:38 AM
You are now a fugu. You are caught and eaten by a group of wealthy Japanese businessmen. Your death makes the news after 3 of them are hospitalized due to poisoning. They successfully sue the restaurant and spend their earnings on another fugu party. Some people never learn.

I wish I had a new mouse!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: valkyrie256 on October 13, 2011, 11:18:25 AM
Granted. Your new pet mouse has rabies.


I wish for world peace.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 13, 2011, 06:08:47 PM
Quote from: kael on October 13, 2011, 01:45:20 AM
Wait, are you an actor?

Nope.  :D I just wish I could randomly break the 4th wall, because that's gotta be my favorite style of joke. And, as an added bonus, being able to break the 4th wall in real life would entail me knowing what exists outside of this.  :o

Quote from: valkyrie256 on October 13, 2011, 11:18:25 AM
I wish for world peace.

Aww, I have to corrupt this? :(
Granted, we finally achieve world peace. And then the world explodes.

I wish I had my own private library.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: valkyrie256 on October 13, 2011, 06:27:49 PM
Granted. Books are now illegal.


I wish that I was the smartest person in the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 13, 2011, 06:31:32 PM
Quote from: valkyrie256 on October 13, 2011, 06:27:49 PM
Granted. Books are now illegal.

There's a book about books being illegal, Fahrenheit 451. Idk it was kinda dumb, in the middle of it some old lady gets caught with a bunch of books and then burns herself alive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 13, 2011, 08:52:03 PM
Quote from: Dante on October 13, 2011, 06:08:47 PM
Nope.  :D I just wish I could randomly break the 4th wall, because that's gotta be my favorite style of joke. And, as an added bonus, being able to break the 4th wall in real life would entail me knowing what exists outside of this.  :o
This reminds me of Deadpool (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deadpool). He's the one superhero that breaks the fourth wall all the time.

Anyway, back on topic.

Quote from: valkyrie256 on October 13, 2011, 06:27:49 PM
Granted. Books are now illegal.


I wish that I was the smartest person in the world.
Congratulations, you are the smartest person in the world! However, due to your intelligence, you are constantly hounded by agencies, both governmental and illegal, wanting you on their side. Heck, even entire countries try to get you on their side, and they don't care what means they use to obtain that. You eventually have to live constantly on the lamb because everyone wants to use your brain power for their own self benefit. You are never able to find a peaceful moment to yourself because of it.

I wish I was as tough as I acted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 13, 2011, 10:21:21 PM
Quote from: Fighter Sadie on October 13, 2011, 08:52:03 PM
This reminds me of Deadpool (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deadpool). He's the one superhero that breaks the fourth wall all the time.

Haha, I interrupted the thread. Whoops.  ::) You know, I seem to remember in some other story there was a character whose actual superpower was to be able to break the fourth wall whenever he wanted to (which is where I got the idea from), but I can't remember for the life of me who it was.  ???

Quote from: Fighter Sadie on October 13, 2011, 08:52:03 PM
I wish I was as tough as I acted.

Granted, you are as tough as you act, but you have a tendency to always act like a cute bunny.

I wish I had enough money to buy a new binder.  :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 13, 2011, 11:12:19 PM
Granted! You are now the proud owner of:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Flskimport.net%2Fyahoo_site_admin%2Fassets%2Fimages%2Fred_binder.6130533_std.jpg&hash=3bcf1d15d3bc91d94bbc3291b04b378563575ae3)

I wish I had some nice fresh salmon to eat right now!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Felix on October 13, 2011, 11:50:05 PM
Granted, but your tasty salmon turns out to have been unsustainably farmed, and the pollution and devastation that led to your thirty minute meal will haunt many future generations.

I wish I could play an instrument.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 14, 2011, 01:02:25 AM
Granted, you play the banjo.

I wish I wasn't ashamed of my past.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Felix on October 14, 2011, 02:36:09 AM
Quote
Granted, you play the banjo.

Omfg I almost spit-taked on that.  :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 14, 2011, 10:35:09 AM
Quote from: Dante on October 14, 2011, 01:02:25 AM
Granted, you play the banjo.

I wish I wasn't ashamed of my past.
Granted. You're no longer afraid of your past, but you now know your future, which you are VERY ashamed of.

I wish I wasn't getting sick >_>.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 14, 2011, 01:16:40 PM
Granted, your eyes get sewn shut and they die anyway.  (God, I'm terrible today, sorry if this sounds mean.  :( )

I wish I could get my haircut today instead of tuesday.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 14, 2011, 01:37:57 PM
Granted. Your hairdresser has a seizure while they're cutting your hair, leaving you with huge patch on your head.

I wish I had a super powers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 14, 2011, 01:42:12 PM
Granted, you have been given the power of camouflage-skin, but you always seem to turn the wrong color when you want to camouflage yourself, which is maddeningly inconvenient, I'd imagine.

I wish the crickets for my science experiment would at least chirp and amuse me, since observing them and taking notes is so boring when they're just.  sitting.  there.   :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 14, 2011, 02:06:49 PM
Granted. Your crickets can now have an understanding of human interaction and can speak themselves, but they turn out to be stereotypical african american gangsters. They talk extremely obnoxiously and threaten to jump you if you tell them to shut up.

I wish I was wealthy.  ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 14, 2011, 03:11:28 PM
Quote from: JoeyD on October 14, 2011, 02:06:49 PM
Granted. Your crickets can now have a full understanding of human interaction and can speak themselves, but they turn out to be stereotypical african american gangsters. They talk extremely obnoxiously and threaten to jump you if you tell them to shut up.

I wish I wealthy.  ::)
(OMFG, Ebonics-speaking crickets!  :D  That is freakin' hilarious!~)
Granted, but then all the poor people decide to kill you.

I wish I didn't need my glasses to see.   :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 14, 2011, 06:55:21 PM
Granted, you don't need glasses to see, because you can't see at all.

I wish the ending of the book I just finished didn't have such an annoying cliffhanger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 14, 2011, 07:40:08 PM
Granted. Instead, the ending just plain sucks. And I'm talking Borderlands bad. "Yeah, I just found the Vault and I can get my phat loot now! Oh >-bleeped-<, giant monster! Yeah I killed the giant monster! Angel lady thanks me! I get...nothing but a chance to play again on a harder difficulty."

I wish we could all just get along~
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 14, 2011, 07:44:00 PM
Granted, but instead of this being a 'transgender resources' forum, it's a forum about murdering/torturing and ways to hide bodies.  >:-)

I wish I had an ass like Nicki Minaj.
(butt-spiration!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 18, 2011, 02:16:14 PM
Granted. You have her ass in a glass jar on a shelf. Too bad the police are after you now...

I wish I get a promotion at my work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 18, 2011, 08:45:25 PM
Granted, you are the new head officer of the new toys division, and your co-workers are children.

I wish I knew more good Halloween movies to watch!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 18, 2011, 10:53:02 PM
You come home to find your entire bookshelf filled with your favorite scary movies.

However, the only one that works is a VHS copy of Ernest Scared Stupid.

I wish I literally had 99 bottles of beer on my wall.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 18, 2011, 11:32:12 PM
Granted, but they're all broken and the beer is all soaked into the carpet. Enjoy!

I wish my homework for this week was already done.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 19, 2011, 12:32:12 AM
Granted. You meet a friendly alien who does your homework for you. However, you lose it the day it's due. Also the alien stole your wallet.

I wish I got paid more!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michelle. on October 19, 2011, 05:02:44 PM
OK. But i'm payin ya' in used cat food cans.

I wish for the end of summer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 19, 2011, 05:10:24 PM
Granted, but the catch is that next year's summer will be twice as long and hotter.

I wish my puppy could take care of himself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 19, 2011, 06:39:21 PM
Granted. Your puppy can take care of himself. He just won't.

I wish work didn't take up so much of my day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 19, 2011, 07:35:57 PM
Granted, you're only at work for 1 hour a day. However, you decide to go back to college, which takes you 15 hours a day.

I wish I had better drawing skills.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 19, 2011, 09:52:32 PM
Granted, you have no joints now.
You practically have sticks for limbs:3

I wish I had a soundproof room so my mom will stop complaining about my loud music.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jayr on October 19, 2011, 10:18:05 PM
Granted. But someone breaks in your room, and does horrible things to you [figure that one out yourself :P].
But since your room is soundproof, no matter how loud you scream. Help never comes.

I wish I had a teleporting machine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 19, 2011, 10:32:39 PM
Quote from: Jayr on October 19, 2011, 10:18:05 PM
Granted. But someone breaks in your room, and does horrible things to you [figure that one out yourself :P].

Tickle torture! >:-)

Granted but on your return trip you accidently bring back an extinct species of bacteria that wipes out all humanity.

I wish I could telepathically look through the eyes of someone else, so I could find my damn cat! >.>
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 19, 2011, 11:01:10 PM
Granted.
No, no one wants to touch you.
No one would think about using you.
A neglected toilet with no purpose in life.

Even >-bleeped-<faced prostitutes rather gulp down their own puke than purge themselves into you.



...
I wish I had an unlimited amount of food.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jayr on October 19, 2011, 11:16:03 PM
Granted. But you're a tree in a dog park. You get pissed on all day. And your branches are broken off and used for fetch.

I wish I was done with this studying.

Ps. She has unlimited amounts of food, therefore the raccoons can't eat all of it. :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 20, 2011, 01:07:41 AM
Granted, and by "other people's" they mean everyone except yours.

I wish the moon was a giant jelly donut.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 20, 2011, 06:12:21 PM
Granted. But an asteroid hits it and you drown in the gooey jelly.

I wish my car was an autobot.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 20, 2011, 10:14:13 PM
Granted. It randomly transforms at the worst possible moments, smashing tunnels, buildings, other cars, and the occasional fire hydrant.

I wish I had a car.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 20, 2011, 10:25:24 PM
Granted.
You're now the owner of the Oscar Mayer Weinermobile :3
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi40.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fe244%2Ffahrer4184%2FOscarMayerWeinermobile.jpg&hash=466b484dad7726093a713409c7ad1ec78fe2ecff)


I wish mosquitos could be moved to another planet.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 21, 2011, 01:00:10 AM
Granted. All the mosquitoes are rounded up and sent to another planet. However, we don't want them to die out, so we decide to send a team of humans along to act as a food source for them. You are the first one picked. Have fun in space!

I wish I could bring books to life.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 21, 2011, 01:33:57 AM
Granted... But you read murder mysteries and the main suspect kills you and the case is never solved

I wish I had an Oscar Mayer Weinermobile  :D
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi40.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fe244%2Ffahrer4184%2FOscarMayerWeinermobile.jpg&hash=466b484dad7726093a713409c7ad1ec78fe2ecff)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on October 21, 2011, 02:07:32 AM
Granted, but the company accidentally gives you the Anthony Weinermobile.  You quickly realize it's not nearly as smooth a ride.

I wish my cat would move off my bed so I could put the sheets on without feeling bad about waking her.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 21, 2011, 02:12:58 AM
Granted. She poofs on top of your roof.

I wish I had to never go to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 21, 2011, 09:17:07 AM
Granted. You now can never sleep, but you still NEED sleep. In other words, you still get tired and drowsy and cranky, but you can never actually sleep.

I wish my co-worker would sell me his ps3 for under $50.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JenJen2011 on October 21, 2011, 12:16:29 PM
Granted. But while you fall to the floor to do a split, you break your legs off.

I wish I was a millionaire.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Akashiya Moka on October 21, 2011, 07:28:20 PM
Granted.  Due to faulty design your house burns down and your entire family dies in the fire; you collect a million dollar settlement but your attorney's outrageous fees eat up most of the profit.


~I wish I had an incorruptible wish that cannot be corrupted by any previous*, concurrent, or subsequent wishes in this universe or in any other.

*Just to rule out time travel (and multiverses). :P >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 21, 2011, 07:30:09 PM
Granted.
You get banned from susans.
THIS THREAD SHALL LIVE!

I wish I had more food to eat.
xD im so fat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Akashiya Moka on October 21, 2011, 07:42:09 PM
Quote from: JoeyD on October 21, 2011, 07:30:09 PM
Granted.
You get banned from susans.

~Totally worth it. ;D

Quote from: JoeyD on October 21, 2011, 07:30:09 PMI wish I had more food to eat.
xD im so fat.

Granted. You are stranded on an island with plenty of coconuts...and only !@#$%& coconuts! Also, there are non-human primates on said island that perceive you as an attractive simian female.... and it is mating season. :P

I wish I could turn into a cat at will! =^.^=
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 21, 2011, 09:43:10 PM
Granted, you can now turn into a saber tooth tiger but every time you do, thousands of scientists converge on your location to try to capture you for study.

I wish swiss cheese had fewer holes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 21, 2011, 10:24:04 PM
Granted. All swiss cheese now has just one giant hole in it.

I wish my acne would stop...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 22, 2011, 02:41:18 AM
Granted, your acne is purged. However, you begin to develop unsightly warts. And somehow, you seem to have been transported to Salem during the witch trials...

I wish I could remember how to sing this Welsh song!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 22, 2011, 07:23:45 AM
Granted. You learn how to sing that one Welsh song you were thinking of, but you've learned it so well that you forgot how to say any words besides the ones in the song.

I wish I was a knight! Huzzah!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 22, 2011, 07:33:36 AM
Granted. You are a knight in the medieval era. You are wounded falling off your horse and die from a simple bacteria that has now spread through your body.

I wish I could smack my employees with no consequence to my job.


Edit: typo.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 22, 2011, 06:05:07 PM
Granted, but the dog isn't alive when you do so.

I wish I made ten times more money than I do.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 22, 2011, 07:52:55 PM
Granted, but the government finds out you're making money "under-the-table", so to speak, and they put you in jail.

I wish binders weren't so expensive!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 22, 2011, 09:10:32 PM
Granted. They're super cheap, which reflects the quality (or lack thereof). You can only use one for about an hour before it disintegrates.

I wish my girlfriend would be more willing to "put out".   >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Akashiya Moka on October 23, 2011, 03:55:08 AM
Granted! She put outs; but only when realllllly drunk & only with other chicks. ;D

I wish my (mostly) past shoulder-length hair would finally grow down to my breasts (especially the stupid hair in the very front which grows way, way, slower than in the back >:()!!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 23, 2011, 03:58:48 AM
Quote from: Akashiya Moka on October 23, 2011, 03:55:08 AM
Granted! She put outs; but only when realllllly drunk & only with other chicks. ;D

I wish my (mostly) past shoulder-length hair would finally grow down to my breasts (especially the stupid hair in the very front which grows way, way, slower than in the back >:()!!!
Grows down to breast fast but keeps growing...you must cut it every day...

I wish that there was no longer any possible way of anything anywhere suffering in any way.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 23, 2011, 05:06:40 AM
Granted. Everything is dead.

I wish I didn't have to go to the bathroom right now. (I think I'm running out of wishes. O.o)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 23, 2011, 08:30:41 AM
Granted. Instead, very similar to my own situation at the moment, you have intense intestinal cramps. But you don't need to go to the bathroom, because you can't!

I wish Camomile tea tasted better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 23, 2011, 12:47:49 PM
Granted, Camomile tea is now the best tasting tea in the world. It's also illegal.

I wish I had $1000 right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 23, 2011, 01:26:05 PM
Granted: it's in Monopoly play money.

I wish I could take a decent photo of myself!  Argh!   :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 23, 2011, 05:19:50 PM
You take a totally awesome pic of yourself... but there was no film in the camera.

I wish I could photosynthesize.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 23, 2011, 05:27:42 PM
Granted, As a result your are now green and will soon be abducted by the government for experiments as you are thought to be an alien and thus do not have any rights.

I wish everything was exactly as is best.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sage on October 23, 2011, 07:40:43 PM
Granted, but the higher powers who grant your wish claim that your statement is a matter of perspective, and decide to have everything as is best, but is different from your opinion of what is best.  The world explodes, because these higher powers believe that an absence of life forms is 'everything as is best.'

I wish my the Homework Fairy would do my homework for me so I can watch South Park instead.   ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 23, 2011, 07:48:49 PM
Granted, the characters from South Park do your homework for you.  >:-)

I wish I had cable.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 23, 2011, 08:01:58 PM
Granted. But you can't wake up.  >:-)

I wish my dog would obey my commands better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 24, 2011, 06:22:08 PM
Granted but In order to skip those two days all days were skipped you are now at the end of time with nothing to do.

I wish that no wish ever was nor ever could be granted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 25, 2011, 01:31:22 AM
Granted. Wait no, not granted. But... if I grant that, you technically never made the wish in the first place, so I can still grant it. GRANTED, YOU JUST CAUSED A PARADOX AND DESTROYED THE WORLD.  :o

I wish we could actually read interesting books in English class.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 25, 2011, 09:29:18 AM
Granted. But now you have to complete one book every class AND give a report on it before the end of class. If you don't complete a single one, you fail the class.

EDIT: I forgot my wish!!!

I wish I had a better memory.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JenJen2011 on October 25, 2011, 09:44:16 AM
Granted. You remember every single detail of your past but you end up having nightmares of all the bad events that occured in your life.

I wish every sex partner was good in bed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 25, 2011, 05:28:36 PM
Granted, there are no more men in the world. And overall population has been severely reduced(including women). Resulting in market crashes and overall civilization breakdown.

I wish I have perfect good luck.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 25, 2011, 06:04:40 PM
Granted, you are given immunity from bad luck. However, people start to wonder how nothing bad ever happens to you, and they become suspicious and start rioting outside your house.

I wish I owned a house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 25, 2011, 06:51:15 PM
Quote from: Dante on October 25, 2011, 06:04:40 PM
Granted, you are given immunity from bad luck. However, people start to wonder how nothing bad ever happens to you, and they become suspicious and start rioting outside your house.
But that would be bad luck...
Unless it leads to something good...right?

Quote

I wish I owned a house.

Granted but the house is on mars.

I wish I could shape-shift back and forth between anything while maintaining mental clarity.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Venus-Castina on October 25, 2011, 06:54:56 PM
Quote from: Abstract on October 25, 2011, 06:51:15 PM
I wish I could shape-shift back and forth between anything while maintaining mental clarity.

Yet each time you do shortens your life with 1 year...


I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lily on October 25, 2011, 10:37:18 PM
You can fly, because gravity is now nonexistent.

Unfortunately, this causes the atmosphere and oceans to drift away into space.

I wish I had a swimming pool of rice pudding.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 25, 2011, 11:08:40 PM
Granted, I make it for you though c:
You get food poisoning which leads to your death due to my horrendous cooking.
:-X

I wish I could shape shift!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Akashiya Moka on October 26, 2011, 03:08:11 AM
Granted.

~You shape shift into a cat, but find yourself unable to change form ever again. You are adopted by me, and spend the rest of your life trying to escape my crazy affection for cute kitties. Be prepared to be cuddled & kissed to death, and for me to play with your whiskers & paws even though it annoys you!

I wish I had an edible giant hamburger as big as a house, that would never grow stale or moldy. (Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking either) :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JenJen2011 on October 26, 2011, 08:03:52 AM
Granted. But instead of you eating the giant edible hamburger, it ate you!

I wish my white clothes are always super white with no stains what-so-ever.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on October 26, 2011, 03:37:20 PM
Granted. But now they're also all radioactive and thus are unsafe to wear.

I wish I was never thirsty.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 26, 2011, 04:57:44 PM
Granted, your body acquires the ability to make its own water. However, to maintain this ability, you have to eat twice as much, and you are constantly hungry.

I wish I didn't have writer's block.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on October 26, 2011, 10:13:50 PM
Granted, you now have so much to write about you don't know where to start.

I wish i had the ability to have anything i think of happen only when i want it too.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on October 27, 2011, 01:35:26 AM
Granted, you're in high school.

I wish my 3D animation project was already done.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fighter on October 28, 2011, 10:11:13 AM
It's done, but it's a very poor quality piece of work.

I wish it wasn't going to snow here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JenJen2011 on October 28, 2011, 10:15:16 AM
Granted. Before the snow hits the ground, it converts into rain and it ends up raining A LOOOOOT! So much that while you're sleeping, the water level reaches 500ft and you drown.

I wish I had a pet pig.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on October 28, 2011, 11:08:41 AM
Granted, but you then learn a valuable lesson about owning a pig as a pet. There's a reason why they're so cute, so you don't murder them and turn them into bacon when they poop every 10 seconds.


I wish finding a job was easier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on November 01, 2011, 07:58:03 PM
Granted half the worlds population dies due to a virus... there is no plenty of workers needed...

I wish I new the best thing for me to do in this life, and how to do it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: valkyrie256 on November 01, 2011, 09:06:20 PM
Granted. You learn the best thing for you to do in life, and how to do it. However, you are physically unable to carry it out.

I wish I was never confused about my gender.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on November 02, 2011, 07:06:45 PM
How can it be the best thing for me to do if I cannot do it?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abstract on November 03, 2011, 10:40:50 AM
Granted, they are all asleep but snore ridiculously loud... it sounds like an earthquake or volcano erupting...


I wish I could live for as long as i wanted to, and could meanwhile heal from any damage back to my original present human form...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Felix on December 30, 2011, 03:26:48 AM
Granted, but healing from damage for some reason doesn't include the ability to forget anything. So you live as long as you want but with memories you don't want to live with.

I wish I could visit Narnia.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on December 30, 2011, 03:41:20 AM
Granted, but it's all been burned to a crisp

I wish a certain friend of mine wasn't so damn rude to me
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on December 30, 2011, 04:01:52 AM
Granted, he now has excruciating body odour and you are stuck next to him on a 13 hour bus trip.

I wish I had a plate of Garlic Prawns.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ryuu on January 02, 2012, 07:59:14 PM
Granted, but the waiter tripped and dropped them - along with a glass of red wine - onto your lap. Too bad you were wearing your nicest clothes!

I wish my dinner would get done quicker, I'm going to piss off my family at this rate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joeyboo~ :3 on January 03, 2012, 08:06:10 AM
Granted, but when you weren't looking rat poison fell in there and you accidentally send them all the hospital..

I wish my throat stopped hurting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 04, 2012, 03:38:20 AM
Granted, now your back hurts.

I wish I could learn any language just by reading each word once.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on January 04, 2012, 03:55:33 AM
Granted, then you realise that Finnish has words that are umpteen letters long, and forget the whole idea.

I wish the wind would stop blowing a gale.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: fionabell on January 04, 2012, 04:04:08 AM
Granted, but the wind was the only thing propping you up as you walk against it so you fall over forward.

I wish I was magically skinny again
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 05, 2012, 01:23:36 AM
Granted. Your culture now considers fat women to be sexy.

I wish that I get this cool watch I want.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on January 05, 2012, 03:24:46 AM
Quote from: Dante on January 05, 2012, 01:23:36 AM
Granted. Your culture now considers fat women to be sexy.

I wish that I get this cool watch I want.

Granted. you get the cool watch, but it is broken. On the plus side, the time is right on it twice daily.

I wish I actually owned a dress.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 08, 2012, 01:18:00 PM
Granted.  Cats were playing in it though so now it is flea infested.

I wish I was an anime character.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xander on January 08, 2012, 03:55:20 PM
Granted. You are Fat Buu from DBZ.

I wish I didn't have a toothache.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 08, 2012, 09:00:50 PM
Quote from: xander on January 08, 2012, 03:55:20 PM
Granted. You are Fat Buu from DBZ.

I wish I didn't have a toothache.

Granted.  The tooth gets rotten and falls out numbing the pain.

I wish I had a cheesecake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xander on January 08, 2012, 09:52:39 PM
Granted. But one of the main ingredients is ass hair.

I wish I had a new video game.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 08, 2012, 09:57:12 PM
Quote from: xander on January 08, 2012, 09:52:39 PM
Granted. But one of the main ingredients is ass hair.

I wish I had a new video game.

Granted.  Your new video game will have so many glitches that it will freeze it everytime.

I wish I had facial hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Michael Joseph on January 08, 2012, 11:00:58 PM
granted. but its everywhere, covering every inch of your face.

i wish it would snow
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 08, 2012, 11:04:49 PM
Granted.  There will be yellow snow everywhere.

I wish I wasn't tired right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 10, 2012, 01:18:17 AM
Granted, you are so awake, you're super hyper and can't even blink.

I wish I had more time to play games and watch anime.  :'(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 01:26:22 AM
Granted but video games and anime has all been outlawed now.

I wish I had a peach soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 10, 2012, 01:41:32 AM
Granted, the peach soda falls out of the sky, hits you on the head, then sprays all over your lap.

I wish I didn't have to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 02:03:10 AM
Quote from: Dante on January 10, 2012, 01:41:32 AM
Granted, the peach soda falls out of the sky, hits you on the head, then sprays all over your lap.

I wish I didn't have to sleep.

Granted but you have so much sugar trying to stay awake that you gain 40 pounds

I wish I didn't have school today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: caseyyy on January 10, 2012, 02:12:36 AM
Granted, but all your teachers and classmates have been killed in a horrible accident.

I wish this room would clean itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 02:20:35 AM
Granted. You will have a robot to clean everything but once it's finished it will malfunction and explode thus making your room dirty again with nuts and bolts.

I wish I had ice cream right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 10, 2012, 02:54:40 AM
Granted.  The ice cream truck comes down your street, but you have to fight your way through a mob of 7 year olds to get to it.  You return victoriously with ice cream but missing several fingers and a shoe.

I wish my graphics card didn't get sad when I try to run Portal 2.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 03:02:23 AM
Quote from: Lee on January 10, 2012, 02:54:40 AM
Granted.  The ice cream truck comes down your street, but you have to fight your way through a mob of 7 year olds to get to it.  You return victoriously with ice cream but missing several fingers and a shoe.
d
I wish my graphics card didn't get sad when I try to run Portal 2.

Granted.  Your graphics card got angry instead and shattered Portal 2 into pieces.

I wish I had 20/20 vision.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lee on January 10, 2012, 03:17:24 AM
Granted but now you can only see things in hindsight.
I wish my knee were healed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 03:22:26 AM
Quote from: Lee on January 10, 2012, 03:17:24 AM
Granted but now you can only see things in hindsight.
I wish my knee were healed.

Granted but then your ankle goes out for overworking your knees once they are healed.

I wish I had a punching bag with gloves.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NikaPlaidypus on January 10, 2012, 05:03:39 AM
Quote from: Malachite on January 10, 2012, 03:22:26 AM
I wish I had a punching bag with gloves.

Granted!  Betty White shows up wearing chainmail gauntlets and beats you to a pulp.

I wish I could reconfigure my genitalia depending on how I was presenting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: caseyyy on January 10, 2012, 09:43:17 AM
Granted, but your pants would be see through.

I wish I didn't drink Pepsi with my breakfast.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 01:59:36 PM
Granted.  The Pepsi spills into your breakfast now.

I wish school was over.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NikaPlaidypus on January 10, 2012, 08:54:43 PM
Granted!  School's over because the zombie apocalypse started in the boy's locker room and everybody got eaten.

I wish that I had a smaller waist and a bigger butt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 09:02:32 PM
Granted. Your butt gets so big that when you sit down on the toilet the toilet breaks and when you fall your waist is so small it snaps off from the impact.

I wish I was taller.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 09:34:14 PM
Quote from: Logan Erik on January 10, 2012, 09:20:23 PM
Granted.  You are eight feet tall.  You can't fit in cars, you can't sit in furniture, you can't walk in buildings, and your limbs are so long you have lousy circulation and joint problems.

I wish I had more energy.


Granted.  Your have so much energy that the authorities take you and do painful genetic testings on you for 10 years.

I wish I was a professional MMA fighter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NikaPlaidypus on January 10, 2012, 09:38:43 PM
Quote from: Malachite on January 10, 2012, 09:34:14 PM

I wish I was a professional MMA fighter.

Granted! Your first opponent is Tony Jaa.

I wish that my stepmother wasn't so bigoted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 10, 2012, 09:54:40 PM
Granted.  She turns into a cheapskate.

I wish I knew how a rasberry tasted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 11, 2012, 12:07:04 AM
Granted. Your taste buds, however, always make raspberries taste like strawberries.

I wish I had my own apartment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 11, 2012, 12:31:21 AM
Quote from: Dante on January 11, 2012, 12:07:04 AM
Granted. Your taste buds, however, always make raspberries taste like strawberries.

I wish I had my own apartment.

Granted but someone will drill a peep hole in your bathroom and watch you every time.

I wish my internet connection sped up.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NikaPlaidypus on January 11, 2012, 02:39:29 AM
Granted!  But your CPU can't handle the data transfer rates and melts.

I wish that extreme right wing Christians would be afflicted with true empathy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on January 11, 2012, 02:54:05 AM
Quote from: NikorNiki on January 11, 2012, 02:39:29 AM
Granted!  But your CPU can't handle the data transfer rates and melts.

I wish that extreme right wing Christians would be afflicted with true empathy.

Granted.

The Christians are are afflicted with empathy, but it's for everyone else and not us.

I wish I could be a Ninja Girl.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 11, 2012, 05:42:45 AM
Granted.  You are now a female ninja turtle.

I wish I had big strong muscles.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: April Dawne on January 11, 2012, 07:57:48 AM
Granted, you now have big strong muscles -- in your fingers and toes. The rest of your body is the same. At least you can open those pickle jars with ease.

I wish my cell would stop freezing and acting so random since the recent update.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 11, 2012, 08:12:43 AM
Quote from: April Dawne on January 11, 2012, 07:57:48 AM
Granted, you now have big strong muscles -- in your fingers and toes. The rest of your body is the same. At least you can open those pickle jars with ease.

I wish my cell would stop freezing and acting so random since the recent update.

Granted.  Your cell phone gets dropped in water and never comes back on again.

I wish my college classes were easy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NikaPlaidypus on January 13, 2012, 04:25:50 AM
Quote from: Malachite on January 11, 2012, 08:12:43 AM
I wish my college classes were easy.

Granted!  Your classes this semester are Advanced Fingerpainting 203, Fun with Construction Paper and Popsicle Sticks 123, The Alphabet 102: N through Z, Whole Numbers 3.14, and Advanced Recess 222.

I wish I didn't have to shave every day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 13, 2012, 05:27:15 AM
Granted.  The last time you shave you accidentally nicked yourself with an infected razor and die from the infection spreading.

I wish I had a red velvet cheesecake
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kollaa on January 24, 2012, 08:33:16 PM
Granted.  Though a few dozen mice happened to 'fall' inside while it was being made.

I wish I had straight hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 24, 2012, 09:34:49 PM
Granted.  Your hair sticks permanately straight up.

I wish I had an energy drink.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 25, 2012, 01:17:18 AM
Granted, you drink it, become hyperactive, and then die from too much strain on your body.

I wish I wouldn't make so many mistakes when I type. (I used to be really awesome at typing, but then I took an arrow to the knee but then I learned how to use the shift key instead of caps lock. XD)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 25, 2012, 10:50:18 AM
Granted.  A ninja comes and slices off your hands (and your knee), therefore eliminating your need to type.

I wish I had 1 billion dollars
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on January 25, 2012, 10:29:23 PM
Granted, you are now Dr. Evil.

I wish I had a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 25, 2012, 10:38:29 PM
Granted.  Your are an over-worked porn star.

I wish my professors gave less work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Felix on March 17, 2012, 03:05:39 AM
Quote from: Malachite on January 25, 2012, 10:38:29 PM
Granted.  You are an over-worked porn star.

I wish my professors gave less work.
Granted. You end up with no discipline and a degree that you could've just purchased in a second-world country.

I wish I had real power and could do more than stand idly by when people I care about are suffering and falling.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on March 17, 2012, 03:08:43 AM
Granted.  You get the real power but the people who are suffering and falling turn their backs on you and don't want you to interfere in their lives.

I wish I had a beard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on March 17, 2012, 04:14:09 AM
Granted.  You have a beard, pity it grows out of your ears and not on your face.

I wish I could get genuine Canadian Chees Curds so I could make proper Poutain.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Artemis on March 17, 2012, 02:18:05 PM
Wow... that is a hard one to corrupt without being a compleet ass  >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: bballshorty on April 19, 2012, 02:18:28 AM
Granted. Except you're a half-ass with a donkey tail =D

I wish I can get into the habit of sleeping earlier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 19, 2012, 05:03:39 AM
Your wish is granted.  You get the sack for falling asleep on Night Shift, and letting 400 ton of molten steel incinerate the staff's tea room.

I wish the NHL was on TV here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 19, 2012, 08:28:53 AM
Granted-however all of your Tvs are broken so you can't watch it.

I wish I had a cheesecake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on April 19, 2012, 10:22:42 AM
You got your cheesecake but the cook misunderstood the concept and made it with cheesewhiz.


I wish Dr. Brownstein gave major discounts and priority to poor people like me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 19, 2012, 10:25:18 AM
Quote from: LordKAT on April 19, 2012, 10:22:42 AM
You got your cheesecake but the cook misunderstood the concept and made it with cheesewhiz.


I wish Dr. Brownstein gave major discounts and priority to poor people like me.


Granted.  Now Dr. Brownstein does half the work for half the pay.

I wish I I lost weight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on April 19, 2012, 11:06:14 AM
Granted, One car accident to remove  your legs and the weight dropped quickly.

I wish for a winning lottery ticket with a high payout.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 19, 2012, 01:42:42 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on April 19, 2012, 11:06:14 AM
Granted, One car accident to remove  your legs and the weight dropped quickly.

I wish for a winning lottery ticket with a high payout.

Granted.  You get the high payout lottery ticket but it was burned in a fire.

I wish I could swim.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ash on April 19, 2012, 02:53:51 PM
Granted, but that doesn't get rid of the sharks.

I wish my hair was shorter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: bballshorty on April 19, 2012, 03:15:12 PM
Granted, a fire burned your hair and eyebrows off.
I wish I could dunk.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 19, 2012, 03:59:51 PM
Quote from: bballshorty on April 19, 2012, 03:15:12 PM
Granted, a fire burned your hair and eyebrows off.
I wish I could dunk.

Granted, you are now given the super ability to jump high but you lost both of your arms in an intense arm wrestling contest.

I wish I was able to transition.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sasamu on April 24, 2012, 03:46:08 AM
Quote from: Malachite on April 19, 2012, 03:59:51 PM
Granted, you are now given the super ability to jump high but you lost both of your arms in an intense arm wrestling contest.

I wish I was able to transition.

Granted, but you transition to an ostrich instead of a male. 

I wish I had a six-pack.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 24, 2012, 04:27:36 AM
Granted.  You have a six-pack, pity it's a half dozen of KB Gold, the world's worst beer.

I wish I was already fluent in French.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 12:23:44 PM
Granted.  You are fluent in French but that languaged died 40 seconds ago so no one will speak it or understand it but you.

I wish I had a sour slushie from the gas station.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on April 24, 2012, 09:52:06 PM
Granted, you have a sour slushie. That is, it's filled with soggy sour gummy worms.

I wish school was over for the year, and that I got straight A's.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 10:23:24 PM
Granted.  School is over for this year but next year they are extending the school period by another month.  You get straight A's but according to a new law an A is failing now.

I wish I had a cheesecake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 10:59:29 PM
You didn't kill the fish.  It killed you.

I wish I had a soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 11:03:22 PM
Wish granted you get a soda, but it's only the carbonated water.

I wish I had a more masculine build.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 11:06:01 PM
Granted.  You turn into a meathead losing 84 percent of your brain function.

I wish I didn't have to use the bathroom.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 11:08:36 PM
Wish granted, you use the restroom where you are.

I wish I had $100.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 11:25:25 PM
Granted.  Howeven an unexpected bill came up that costs $100 exactly.

I wish I had more video games.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 11:30:00 PM
Wish granted, however your gaming systems were stolen and now you can't play the new games.

I wish I had wings.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 24, 2012, 11:36:34 PM
Granted.  You are given an extra hot bucket of half-eaten chicken wings.

I wish I found more money on the ground.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 24, 2012, 11:41:22 PM
Quote from: Malachite on April 24, 2012, 11:36:34 PM
Granted.  You are given an extra hot bucket of half-eaten chicken wings.

Thats just gross -.-

Wish granted, but you're arrested for "stealing money".

I wish I was reborn as a cat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 12:32:33 AM
Granted.  Too bad you got ran over by a truck when trying to cross the street though.

I wish I was a tapeworm waddling in a bucket of water....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 25, 2012, 12:42:44 AM
o.O wish granted but after infecting someone you're killed off but medication

i wish i could shoot lazers out of my eyes
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 12:46:07 AM
Granted.  You accidently zapped a mirror and the laser bounced back on to your forehead burning it to the core of your brain.

I wish I owned Gamestop.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 25, 2012, 12:50:59 AM
wish granted but it tanks and you now owe the US goverment thousands of dollars (and theres an angry mob of gamers at your front door)

i wish i had a job
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 01:10:12 AM
Granted.  You are overworked and tired as you work 108 hours a week.

I wish I had a McDonald's Ice Cream cone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on April 25, 2012, 09:51:06 AM
Granted. But it's just the cone and there is no ice cream.

I wish I was no longer in debt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 25, 2012, 10:31:19 AM
Wish granted, but you're also no longer alive.

I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on April 25, 2012, 03:05:11 PM
Granted, but you have no control over it. You fly At random, especially in your sleep. And when you wake up, you fall from the sky. Ouch.

I wish I was good at baking.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 25, 2012, 03:26:26 PM
Granted, but only small children, and their mothers stare at you disapprovingly as you do.

I wish I was a lemon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 03:38:00 PM
Granted.  However you are squeezed to death in the process of making lemonade

I wish I had pizza..
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 25, 2012, 03:47:45 PM
Granted. and its authentic italian! from Pompei! Maybe it is a tad fossilised.

I wish potatoes were extinct
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 03:58:39 PM
Granted.  A meteor hit the Earth so EVERYTHING is extinct now.

I wish I had a peach soda
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 09:41:23 PM
Darn and those sodas look tasty too. 

Wish granted.  Every cat on Earth now sees you as a scratching post now....

I wish I was handsome
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sasamu on April 25, 2012, 09:53:36 PM
Granted but you're only handsome in the eyes of old women.

I wish my voice was deeper.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 25, 2012, 10:22:07 PM
Granted.  Your voice is so deep that no one can understand you.

I wish I would have changed my ad on Craigslist earlier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 01:23:11 PM
Granted, but no one cares about your ad (sorry dude)

I wish I had some motivation.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 01:49:03 PM
Granted.  You have so much motivation but you forgot what you wanted to be motivated for.

I wish I wasn't so tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 01:51:27 PM
Granted. You no longer tired but you can't think straight either.

I wish I had a PS3
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 09:40:19 PM
Granted.  Sadly your PS3 gets the YLOD upon playing it.

I wish I could skateboard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 09:55:57 PM
Granted. However skateboards ceased to exist yesterday.

I wish I had another cat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 10:05:40 PM
Granted.  This cat hates you though.

I wish I only had a taste for healthy foods.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:22:31 PM
Granted except you have to deal with this outrageous smelling B.O. now

I wish I had my own air plane
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 11:26:07 PM
Graned.  You now own a paper air plane that has been stepped on.

I wish I could drive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:28:01 PM
Quote from: Malachite on April 26, 2012, 11:26:07 PM
Graned.  You now own a paper air plane that has been stepped on.

T^T why'd you step on it!

Granted but driving is pointless since we now use teleportation to transport ourselves to and from our destinations.

I wish I could lick the moon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 11:39:19 PM
Quote from: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:28:01 PM
T^T why'd you step on it!

Granted but driving is pointless since we now use teleportation to transport ourselves to and from our destinations.

I wish I could lick the moon.

Granted.  You can lick the moon but you get a parasite from doing so.  (Totally ironic wish after what I wrote in the next person to post game.  I didn't see it coming lol.)

I wish I never had to blow my nose again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:41:00 PM
Granted you don't have a nose! (And great minds think a like ^^)

I wish I had some black duct tape
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 11:47:42 PM
Granted.  You have black duct tape but it isn't sticky enough.

I wish I had a pocket knife.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:49:18 PM
Granted but it has no blade

I wish I had darker hair
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 26, 2012, 11:51:43 PM
Granted.   Now you have darker nose hairs

I wish I lived in Australia.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 26, 2012, 11:56:00 PM
Granted except Australia is now the testing ground for everyone's nuclear weapons (sounds like a party)

I wish zombies existed
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 12:06:56 AM
Granted.  Everyone but you went to Mars and took all the survival stuff so now it's just you and a bunch of  blood thirsty zombies running around.

I wish I was taller.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 12:13:57 AM
Granted. But everyone else is a hobbit so you are rather uncomfortable and have to crawl around in peoples houses

I wish I was older
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 12:18:28 AM
Granted.  You are so old that you can't walk, see, or hear anymore and you constantly use the bathroom on yourself.

I wish I had an energy drink.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 12:25:53 AM
Granted but it tastes like an old person's waste '^-^'

I wish I could transform into a piece of fruit
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 12:36:50 AM
Granted.  You are now that tiny sour grape that never got a chance to fully develop.

I wish Walmart would lower their prices.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 12:49:03 AM
Granted but when before you can buy anything they're completely sold out of everything except old people depends and a tube of open toothpaste

I wish I wasn't drawing in ink
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 12:52:31 AM
Granted.  You are now drawing in your own blood. 

I wish the Sailor Moon abridged series would cover the entire 200 episodes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:03:18 AM
Granted, they copied over it and Sailor Moon no longer exists

I wish dinosaurs were not extinct
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:05:41 AM
Granted.  Now there are dinosaurs running around crushing houses and eating people. 

I wish I was the WWE Champion.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:08:36 AM
Quote from: Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:05:41 AM
Granted.  Now there are dinosaurs running around crushing houses and eating people. 

^^ how is that bad?

Granted but nobody cares or knows what WWE is anymore (aw)

I wish I could use Death Magik
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:13:20 AM
Oh yeah I forgot this is the guy who dreams about WW3 and destruction  :D Uhhhh you get eaten!

Granted.  You use the magik of death to put you in a deep sleep forever

I wish my hands were bigger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:15:36 AM
Granted however they are the size of a small house and you lack the strength to life or use them, plus they are really hairy and horde of small children live under them

I wish I could simply snap my fingers and money would appear
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:19:22 AM
Granted.  However the whole world went to a complete bartering system so there is no more use for money.

I wish I had a girlfriend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:22:26 AM
Granted but it turns out she's your long lost half sister (that would be sick)

I wish I wasn't so pale
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:26:56 AM
Granted.  You aren't pale anymore but you are now blind so you can't tell the difference.

I wish fishing didn't hurt the fish or live bait.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:29:32 AM
Granted water no longer exists and nor does fish

I wish a solar flare would hit earth ^o^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:35:59 AM
Granted.  You slept through it the whole time though.

I wish breakfast was illegal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:39:15 AM
Granted but so is lunch and dinner and food has been banned all together.

I wish i owned an Aston Martin.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:46:36 AM
Granted but Ashton breaks out of the cage and escapes.

I wish I had Chinese food right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:08:44 PM
Granted but its 100 years old and breathing on its own

I wish I could tie my shoes right ^^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:17:05 PM
Granted.  Now you forget how to put on the rest of your clothes.

I wish I had  $50,000.54
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:25:37 PM
granted but the USA no longer exists and american currency is worthless

I wish I could bend metal with my mind
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:27:04 PM
Granted.  Everytime you bend metal with your mind your bones tend to bend as well.

I wish I had a pizza
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:29:43 PM
Granted but its just the dough and its uncooked and gives you a really bad stomach ache along with something else ^~^

I wish for world peace ^^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:33:53 PM
Granted.  Too bad it came too late after a nuke blew everyone up.

I wish I was awake fully.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:39:55 PM
granted, but you have narcolepsy and now your back asleep

I wish I could turn into a wirewolf
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:41:37 PM
Granted.  You are now a plastic wirewolf toy.

I wish my fingers were longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:47:46 PM
Granted they're now 7 feet lone each and you are in the book of world records, congrats.

I wish there was a ceral called 'Death'
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 01:49:48 PM
Granted.  Too bad it's for promotional display only.

I wish my legs were skinnier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 01:55:41 PM
Granted but they are now so skinny you can't put any weight on them without breaking them
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:00:12 PM
Where's the wish? >.>
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 02:03:27 PM
meh it cut it off!!! (my internet likes to fluxuate)

I wish my internet would work right ^o^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:05:59 PM
Granted.  You internet works fine but it's your PC/Laptop that's is broken.

I wish I could go out to eat more often.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 02:08:06 PM
(lol its an XP so i doubt it! ^.^)
Granted but all there is to eat is soy burgers with no toppings

I wish I could sing like Simon Curtis
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:09:28 PM
Granted but everyone around you is deaf

I wish I could legally change my name.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 02:16:33 PM
Granted but no one no longer goes by names, instead we just grunt and point (haha that's a funny mental image)

I wish I was a blood elf
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:33:48 PM
granted you are now an elf covered in ant blood

I wish the summer was longer
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 02:41:47 PM
Granted the president decided to get rid of the other seasons and just have a summer that has a snowing period in it

I wish i had a light saber
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:42:49 PM
Granted.  Too bad it won't cut on though.

I wish I had MMA gloves
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 27, 2012, 02:45:45 PM
Granted, you now have Massive Mutant Antifreeze gloves.

I wish i procrastinated less
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 02:53:26 PM
Granted but nothing has a certain due date now.

I wish I had a tail
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 02:54:59 PM
Granted but it causes a weird bulge in the back of your pants and people give you very strange looks and its awkward to sit

I wish I had ketchup
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 27, 2012, 03:07:53 PM
Granted, but now the ketchup vampires are after you, and worse - you're shiney!

I wish for more wishes
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 03:14:35 PM
Granted but the coupon for more wishes experied yesterday.

I wish I had a swimming pool
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sasamu on April 27, 2012, 04:15:55 PM
Granted. You have a pool... meant for toddlers.

I wish I was a billionaire! :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 04:18:53 PM
Granted but everyone else is really poor and decides to kill you and take your money (oo bad call)

I wish for lickable wall paper
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 04:19:48 PM
Granted.  The wall paper you lick tastes like sweaty gym socks


I wish my eyesight was perfect.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 04:22:21 PM
Granted but light ceases to exist and so seeing no longer matters

I wish the world was made of glass
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 04:24:19 PM
Granted.  However a little kid threw a rock and now there's shards everywhere you have to walkthrough.

I wish I was a bucket.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 04:25:27 PM
Granted however there is a hole in you and you are now useless

I wish cars could fly
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 04:26:41 PM
Granted.  However it's illegal to fly cars  now.

I wish I didn't eat as much.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 04:31:49 PM
Granted now you don't eat at all (uh-oh)

I wish I was a ninja!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 04:41:20 PM
Granted.  You are a ninja turtle that was captured and made into turtle stew

I wish I had a flat chest.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 05:48:47 PM
Granted expect you are now the last human so no one really cares

I wish society was formed diferently
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 06:33:54 PM
Granted.  Everyone worships vegetables.

I wish I had a a car.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 07:07:28 PM
Granted but streets no longer exist and everyone uses bikes as transports

I wish everything was shades of grey
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 07:10:46 PM
Granted.  You are blind though so it wouldn't matter.

I wish I had another eggroll.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 27, 2012, 07:29:38 PM
Granted but its filled with dog fur

I wish X-box live was free
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 27, 2012, 07:33:07 PM
Granted.  However everyone plays PSN now.

I wish I had a bigger tv.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 28, 2012, 03:21:54 PM
granted however the screen size is 1"x1"

i wish i had some soup
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 06:00:04 PM
Granted.  It has a fly in it.

I wish I had a Redbull Energy Drink
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 28, 2012, 06:01:10 PM
Granted but it contains actually red bull body parts

I wish people were excepting of others
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 06:03:41 PM
Granted.  You are the only person left that isn't accepting of others.

I wish I had white chocolate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 28, 2012, 06:07:17 PM
Granted except its burnt and tastes like old tofu

I wish my bed would make itself
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 06:08:47 PM
Granted.  There's a giant sinkhole under it and swallows everything whole.  Problem solved

I wish I felt like being active today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 28, 2012, 06:14:16 PM
Granted but today is the day the world ends so it was pointless in being active anyways ^^'

I wish I wasn't drinking a soda
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 06:17:26 PM
Granted.  You are now drinking blood.

I wish I was a bar of soap.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 28, 2012, 07:44:10 PM
Granted but its really old, falling apart and moldy

I wish I sparkled in the sun light ^^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 08:53:11 PM
Granted.  The sparkle is so it it burns everyone to touch.

I wish I was on the moon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Elijah3291 on April 28, 2012, 09:31:37 PM
Granted.  But you can never leave now and you are the only one there and you are out of toilet paper.

I wish my cat would come cuddle with me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 09:35:38 PM
Granted.  While your cat is cuddling with you it has uncontrollable gas.

I wish I had a lot of money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on April 28, 2012, 09:40:33 PM
Quote from: Malachite on April 28, 2012, 09:35:38 PM
I wish I had a lot of money.
Granted, but you can only spend it at McDonald's.

I wish I had a bigger apartment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 09:50:40 PM
Granted.  The walls are covered in fugus and holes though.

I wish I had my driver's license
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on April 28, 2012, 09:55:11 PM
Quote from: Malachite on April 28, 2012, 09:50:40 PM
I wish I had my driver's license
Granted,  but your car is 2 inches long and says "Hot Wheels" on the bottom.

I wish I had some tacos.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 10:11:00 PM
Granted.  You now have tacos that were found in the trash can.

I wish I had a rubber duck.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on April 28, 2012, 10:35:48 PM
Quote from: Malachite on April 28, 2012, 10:11:00 PM
I wish I had a rubber duck.
Granted, but it runs away with your best friend's rubber chicken.

I wish seafood was cheaper.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 28, 2012, 10:37:35 PM
Granted.  Seafood is now illegal to eat in the states making it much cheaper for you.

I wish I had 20/20 vision.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 12:28:33 AM
Granted but 20/20 means your legally blind

I wish I could do a triple back flip
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 12:55:14 AM
granted but you throw your back out every time you do one now

I wish I had an eggroll
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 12:57:47 AM
Granted but its 3 weeks old and smells like athletes foot

I wish I was made of lint
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 01:00:13 AM
Granted.  Now you have the honor of being stuck in a fat man's belly button for years to come.

I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 01:04:51 AM
Granted except you are sucked into the turbine engine of a passanger plane and become red sauce

I wish they would post the next episode of TFP on youtube already!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 01:06:52 AM
Granted.  Too bad they take it down before you are able to see it.

I wish I knew how to duel with Yugioh cards.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 01:13:07 AM
Granted but Yu-Gi-Oh is no longer popular and no one will play against you

I wish World of Warcraft was completely free like Dungeons and Dragons
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 01:28:22 AM
Granted.  WoW is free but the all of the rules changed completely and it gets so complicated that you refuse to play

I wish I was a professional boxer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 01:33:35 AM
Granted but people box with swords now and you didn't get the memo till after you entered the ring

I wish the sun was blue
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 01:35:23 AM
Granted.  The sun is blue and spits blue poisionous gas down to Earth and it kills people.

I wish I had facial hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 01:50:41 AM
Quote from: Malachite on April 29, 2012, 01:35:23 AM
Granted.  The sun is blue and spits blue poisionous gas down to Earth and it kills people.

Yay! Dreams do come true

Granted but you only have 3 hairs and they're 3 feet long each

I wish the primary colours were Red Green Purple
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 03:04:37 AM
Granted but you are color blind so you couldn't tell the difference.

I wish I was stronger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 29, 2012, 11:51:32 AM
Granted, but everything else becomes heavier so you cant tell the difference

I wish pixies would tidy my room
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ohnoimaduck on April 29, 2012, 11:59:15 AM
Granted, but they explode after they're done cleaning.

I wish Half-Life 3 was released already. :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 12:39:42 PM
Granted but it's all sold out before you could get to it.

I wish my stomach was flatter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 12:57:04 PM
Granted but everything else is puffed out

I wish my cat would stop teething
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 03:00:18 PM
Granted.  Your cat stops teething but now it has diarrhea.

I wish I had my own apartment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 04:17:53 PM
Granted but it has no ceiling and only two walls

I wish I could morph into a fish
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 04:19:01 PM
Granted.  As soon as you morph into a fish a shark eats you.

I wish my legs were muscular.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 04:55:57 PM
Granted but rest of you is skinny as a pencil so you like rather alienish

I wish Earth was an all water planet
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 04:57:58 PM
Granted.  However the Earth is destroyed 4 seconds after that so you can't enjoy it.

I wish I had gummie worms.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 05:02:44 PM
Granted but I licked them before giving them to you

I wish I had some more tofu
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 05:23:56 PM
Granted.  However your tofu is pea sized.

I wish I had strawberry milk.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 06:46:21 PM
granted but it has fly carcasses in it

I wish I would get off the couch
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 06:56:56 PM
granted, you go straight to the bed and do the same thing you were doing on the couch

I wish people around me weren't sick
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 07:10:11 PM
Granted except now your sick

I wish fish didnt smell so bad
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 07:13:18 PM
Granted.  Fish now smells like a fruity turd instead of the regular fish smell.

I wish I had superpowers.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 07:17:14 PM
granted but your superpower is detecting ant feelings

i wish i had a pet dragon
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 07:26:12 PM
Granted but it breathes fire into your eyeballs melting your skull.

I wish my bat was newer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 08:24:05 PM
Granted but its all 1" long

I wish I hadn't burnt my popcorn
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 11:02:11 PM
Granted.  You accidently drop it on the floor instead.

I wish I had a turkey sandwich.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 11:21:24 PM
(eh i could probably live with that)

Granted but it's a live turkey stuck between to unbaked loaves a bread and its angry

I wish I had my own gym
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 29, 2012, 11:28:04 PM
Granted.  All your equipment is broken though.

I wish there was a full moon tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sasamu on April 29, 2012, 11:33:16 PM
Granted, but you know what they say about full moons. They make people go crazy. So a man decides to run his car thourgh your house destroying your computer(or laptop). :s

I wish I could find a new song I like.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on April 29, 2012, 11:35:24 PM
Granted but after you decide its kind of catchy it starts to drive you insane and you become an axe murder

I wish I could climb up walls like Spiderman
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 30, 2012, 12:06:34 AM
Granted.  Walls do not exist anymore.

I wish I wasn't full from food.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 30, 2012, 04:07:18 AM
Granted. You are now full of Indigestion remedy.

I wish I could get motivated to do some study tonight.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 30, 2012, 04:21:11 AM
Granted.  You are now motivated to study everything about Superman.

I wish my legs weren't so thick.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on April 30, 2012, 04:25:24 AM
Granted.  You legs aren't thick, they are really clever, your arms however are now really dumb.

I wish I had J Lo's bum.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 30, 2012, 04:30:49 AM
Granted.  You get J-Lo's bum but you break every chair you sit in afterwards.

I wish I had more facial hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on April 30, 2012, 11:57:36 AM
Quote from: Malachite on April 30, 2012, 04:30:49 AM
I wish I had more facial hair.
Granted, but it was grafted from Oscar the Grouch.

I wish chocolate wasn't fattening.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 30, 2012, 12:33:46 PM
Granted.  Now chocolate is tasteless and not pleasing to the tounge.  Not fattening though!

I wish my eyes were blue.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on April 30, 2012, 04:33:32 PM
granted, however your eyelids have sealed shut so no one can ever see them

i wish i could watch the new bones episode now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on April 30, 2012, 04:55:24 PM
Granted.  It sucks so bad that you wish you were doing soemthing else.

I wish I never had to put on deodorant.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 01, 2012, 02:06:24 PM
it never has been the same since booth and bones got together :(

Granted, your arms were savaged by an escaped time traveling lemur back in '62 and the arm cannon prosthetics wont be out of R&D for another ten years.

i wish i had more space for books
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 02, 2012, 05:47:52 AM
Granted. However everything is now published as an ebook only, so you no longer need the room.

I wish I had steak for dinner tonight instead of fish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 02, 2012, 05:57:26 AM
Granted.  The steak is burnt to a crisp.

I wish I wasn't tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 02, 2012, 06:08:42 AM
Granted. You are no longer tired. You are exhausted.
I wish I had a carton of genuine Canadian cheese curds to make real poutain.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 03, 2012, 06:09:12 AM
Granted but that's the last one left on Earth.

I wish my teeth were perfect.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 03, 2012, 07:19:56 AM
Granted.  You have perfect shark's teeth and keep biting your tongue off.

I wish I had been able to remember the names of the four types of fish scales in my Biology test this morning.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 03, 2012, 07:23:43 AM
Granted.  Next time you will have to write a 10 page paper describing each fish scale in detail.

I wish I lived by an ocean.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 03, 2012, 03:44:36 PM
Granted, due to gloabal waring, there is no more land (yes it some how magically scienceically produced vast amounts of water as well as melting the polar ice caps and everything) so you live by the sea on a raft, as all the underwater cities are full up.

I wish there were more green sweets
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 03, 2012, 03:58:43 PM
Granted.  There are more green sweets but they are all held at the center of the Earth so you can't get to them.

I wish my laptop battery lasted longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Marion on May 04, 2012, 05:23:12 AM
Granted. However, it keeps getting progressively hotter. Eventually you have to use a silicone mat on top of a cooling lap desk, and you'll end up melting things occasionally.

I wish I had more time to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 04, 2012, 05:50:10 AM
Granted. Unfortunately you now also have insomnia.
I wish i had really been allowed to rip the people in CantreLink a new a****** *today. >:(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 04, 2012, 05:58:49 AM
Granted.  You literally rip their a****** and get the bodily remains all over your hands and arms.

I wish I could make up my mind about things.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 06, 2012, 04:55:52 PM
granted, though you made up your mind to never make up your mind ...

I wish that when i touched stuff it would turn to skittles too
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 05:07:07 PM
granted except now you have an itch on your nose and its really really bugging you...

I wish sun would always shine and never go down
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 06:34:54 PM
Granted.  Now the sun overheats and we all burn to death.

I wish my nephew wasn't in my room.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 07:36:13 PM
Granted but now the two of you are in the closet together because there is a raptor in your room

I wish I knew how to end things better...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 07:40:31 PM
granted- it doesn't change the other people's thoughts though

I wish I had blue eyes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 08:01:00 PM
granted but everyone is colour blind so it doesn't matter

I wish i had more wealth
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 08:37:20 PM
Granted.  You gain wealth after you die.

I wish I wasn't itchy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 08:47:52 PM
Granted but now your on fire

I wish I was an A.I. program
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 09:00:46 PM
Granted but it's you are the defective type.

I wish I had ice cream.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 09:07:33 PM
Granted but it was tucked in the couch cushions for a couple of hours so its melted and rather warm

I wish Gravity didn't exist
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 09:10:59 PM
Granted but now friction is gone so all we do now is slip and slide until we die.


I wish I had a sub sandwich.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 09:21:57 PM
Granted but it is a sub sandwich of worms and crickets and smells faintly or B.O. and old sneakers.

I wish I had a pet dinosaur
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 09:34:44 PM
granted.  You get a T-rex that eats you

I wish I had some mall cookies.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 06, 2012, 10:24:43 PM
Granted but your jaw no longer works so you can't eat them

I wish I had a cigarette (OMG where did that come from!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 06, 2012, 10:45:23 PM
Granted.  You now have a used cigarette from the trash can.

I wish it wasn't hot.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 07, 2012, 06:55:53 AM
Granted, now its so cold it burns (thank you Jonathon Creek ^^^ )

I wish i could go out and dance in the rain
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 07, 2012, 07:01:35 AM
Granted but you slipped and broke your arm.

I wish exercise never existed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 09, 2012, 06:08:26 PM
granted, but it is illegal to eat anthing other than celery, or the BMI police will take you away for 'inquistion'.

I wish I was better with words
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 09, 2012, 09:02:47 PM
Granted but now you can't speak.

I wish I didn't sleep all day today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 09, 2012, 09:07:10 PM
granted, but now you have insomnia so bad that you cry tears of milk.

I wish i could teleport
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 09, 2012, 09:34:11 PM
Granted but you can only teleport to a cow's stomach.


I wish I had a girlfriend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 09, 2012, 09:52:25 PM
granted, and she stays inflated for up to 3 days!

I wish i'd got some sleep before it was too late.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 09, 2012, 10:31:53 PM
Granted.  You go to sleep and never wake up again.

I wish I had a peach.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 09, 2012, 11:18:54 PM
Granted and it has a magikal worm inside of it, accept you ate it and now glow a faint green in the dark

I wish NC would revoke that bill
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 09, 2012, 11:23:50 PM
Granted.  NC also makes all marriages illegal now whether it's gay or straight.

I wish I had more ps3 games
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 09, 2012, 11:50:59 PM
granted but I stole your console so you can't play them but was kind enough to leave a note and directions to the nearest poilce station (aw ^^)

I wish I had better abs
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 09, 2012, 11:54:02 PM
Granted.  You have abs of steel but they are covered in scars.

I wish I had a soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 10, 2012, 12:05:58 AM
(hard core...as long as their not hearts and bunny shaped scars)

granted but is diet, flat, and some homeless man spit in it.

i wish the "one ring" really did exist
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on May 10, 2012, 04:50:31 AM
Granted.  And so does Sauron.

I wish I could sleep for more than 4 hours at a stretch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 10, 2012, 05:33:26 AM
Granted but the longer you sleep the more you wet the bed.

I wish I had some Chinese food right now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 10, 2012, 08:49:54 AM
Granted, your cupboards are filled with chinese flavour soylent green, enjoy!

I wish the hover worked its self
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 10, 2012, 10:07:50 AM
Granted but now it wants to take over the world!

I wish I was a ninja pirate
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 10, 2012, 05:55:09 PM
Granted but you are in jail and can't act out on your powers.

I wish there wasn't sodium in foods.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 11, 2012, 10:07:34 AM
Granted but now all foods are 500% more fatty! *insert cheesy comerical voice* ^o^

I wish I had a job already that was pleasent and not overwhelming or gross
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 11, 2012, 01:03:39 PM
granted, however you have an grown an inoperable benign apathy inducing tumor and the pleasantness is loss on you as everything feels like pure unadulterated drudgery

I wish my hair grew a lighter shade
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 11, 2012, 04:55:31 PM
Granted but now your face turned purple so it doesn't match.

I wish I didn't sleep all the time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 12, 2012, 01:38:38 AM
Granted instead you have to use the restroom every 5 minutes and so you can no longer sleep properly

I wish microwaves didn't beep so loud
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 12, 2012, 01:40:10 AM
Granted.  However now all microwaves overcook your food if you leave it on for more than 5 seconds.

I wish I had sour candy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 12, 2012, 10:01:53 AM
Granted but its also extremely bitter and smells faintly of old people

I wish my neighbors weren't so noisy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 12, 2012, 01:09:31 PM
Grante.  Now they stalk you.

I wish I had stronger bones.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 13, 2012, 04:27:48 AM
Granted, but now your burce willis and have to fight terroists. while singing 'love machine' and doing a silly dance.

I wish there was more food
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 13, 2012, 04:28:54 AM
granted but all the food was thrown into the ocean

I wish my kitten would sleep more.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 13, 2012, 08:57:11 PM
Granted but it also snores and has really bad gas

I wish I had some Arizona Green Tea
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 12:06:26 AM
Granted but it's been drank out of already.

I wish I could see a gender therapist who will write my letters of reccomendation.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 14, 2012, 01:31:25 PM
Granted but no one will accept them

I wish my BMI was lower
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 04:54:25 PM
Granted but your blood pressure increases.

I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 14, 2012, 05:12:39 PM
granted, but you are falsely imprisoned  in a small cell by M.I.8.

I wish i could move out
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 05:13:56 PM
Granted.  The only place you can move to though is the swamp now.

I wish I had two dollars.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on May 14, 2012, 05:21:37 PM
Quote from: Malachite on May 14, 2012, 05:13:56 PM
I wish I had two dollars.
Granted: it's Monopoly money.

I wish tattoos didn't hurt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 05:29:36 PM
Granted.  Your tattoos now come off at the touch of water.

I wish I had more energy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on May 14, 2012, 05:44:36 PM
Quote from: Malachite on May 14, 2012, 05:29:36 PM
I wish I had more energy.
Grated: you've been overdosed with gamma ray energy and now you look like the Hulk.

I wish I had a bowl of wonton soup.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 05:46:39 PM
Granted.  It's frozen so bad that it tastes like freezer fur.

I wish my mom would leave me alone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 14, 2012, 06:00:59 PM
granted, but now every one else is bugging you

i wish it were  raining
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2012, 11:01:04 PM
Granted.  It's raining used tampons.

I wish my teeth were healthy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 15, 2012, 09:48:23 AM
Granted but they're plastic and you have to take them out at night

I wish I had a rocket launcher
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2012, 11:13:52 AM
Granted but it's a replica and doesn't do anything.

I wish the end of the world happened soon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 15, 2012, 03:40:04 PM
Granted but the apocalypse is 17 years of congress debating what to do with a stuffed rabbit

I wish I had a motorcycle
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2012, 12:24:08 AM
Granted.  You are given a a motorcycle with no wheels or engine.

I wish my eyesight was perfect.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 16, 2012, 08:09:34 AM
Granted but to do so they have to be removed and someone decides to keep them for themselves

I wish the moon was a smiley face
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2012, 10:42:02 AM
Granted but it drools spit right on top of your head from a continuous smile.

I wish I could visit space.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 16, 2012, 12:42:56 PM
Granted but your stuck in a space shuttle with a bunch of chimps hyped up on Rockstars

I wish I lived in California
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 16, 2012, 01:18:28 PM
granted, you live in california, wyoming - population 364(+1)

I wish I had more noodles
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2012, 03:51:10 PM
Granted but they are made of worms.

I wish I had a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 16, 2012, 07:07:47 PM
Granted its to stare at the wall without blinking for 8 hours straight and you only get a penny an hour

I wish i could go skydiving with a fully functionable parachute
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2012, 10:29:32 PM
Quote from: JayKyle on May 16, 2012, 07:07:47 PM
Granted its to stare at the wall without blinking for 8 hours straight and you only get a penny an hour

I wish i could go skydiving with a fully functionable parachute

Granted but you land in the ocean.

I wish my hair was shorter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 16, 2012, 10:47:05 PM
Granted but now your bald and have red itches sploches all over your head

I wish society wasn't so rigidly structred
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2012, 11:06:34 PM
Granted but that happens in a 1,000 years so you won't be able to witness it.

I wish that Red Lobster hired me for the job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 17, 2012, 12:46:58 AM
Granted. You are hired as a dancing lobster.

I wish the program I need to use to finish my project on time would quit being a bitch to me. >.>
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2012, 12:51:24 AM
Omg that would be so cool!

Granted but now you have to do another project  that requires 7 different programs that you have to buy.

I wish I had Chinese Food
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on May 17, 2012, 12:53:29 AM
(Remember Judge Trudy on The Amanda Show? :P)

Granted. It's your absolute favorite dish, but after your first bite, you realize there are worms in it.

I wish it was the weekend already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2012, 12:57:20 AM
Oh yes I remember that show!  :D

Granted but now there are 40 hours in a day so your weekdays are longer.

I wish I had a peach soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on May 17, 2012, 10:13:58 AM
Quote from: Malachite on May 17, 2012, 12:57:20 AM
I wish I had a peach soda.
Granted, but you're so excited to have said soda you spill it on your shoes.

I wish my nails were perfect.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2012, 10:22:20 AM
Granted.  You have brand new nails from Ace Hardware that are perfect for fixing up things.

I wish I was richest person in the world.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 17, 2012, 12:13:04 PM
Granted but its also the zombie apocalypse and all you have is all that cash to beat off that brain hungry mob!

I wish I lived by myself
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 17, 2012, 03:06:55 PM
Granted, but the penguins want you out as your driving down the prices in the antarctic neighbourhood by using centre heating and making it too warm, so they have graffitied your house with xenophobic slurs. And there are no shops and the penguins wont share their food.

I wish I was lemon flavoured
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2012, 05:45:54 PM
Granted.  You smell like a lemon that a cat has pooped on.

I wish I know how to put on a tie.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 17, 2012, 06:46:52 PM
Granted, but its eaten by the rabbits you used.

I wish Tenacious D tickets were cheaper
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JayKyle on May 17, 2012, 07:06:55 PM
Granted but their also fake...

I wish my cat would stop eating fake houseplants
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2012, 11:37:52 PM
Granted but your cat starts snatching food off your dinner plate.

I wish my leg didn't itch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LoveInMyEyes on May 18, 2012, 12:36:41 AM
Granted, your legs don't itch. Because you no longer have any!

I wish I were a drummer in a band.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2012, 12:59:32 AM
Granted but the band gets rid of you after the first week.

I wish I had some Pepto Bismol.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 18, 2012, 05:54:18 AM
Granted, but you accidentally drink coke with it and turn into a human mentoes experiment

I wish I had green eyes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2012, 06:14:18 AM
Granted but you're the last person alive so no one gets to see them.

I wish more jobs let you fill out applications online.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LoveInMyEyes on May 18, 2012, 12:59:39 PM
Granted, but none of the employers read them.

I wish I had a computer without a bad power cord.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Demiguy on May 18, 2012, 01:19:07 PM
Granted. But then you would only see the blue screen of death.

I wish I had an apartment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2012, 04:11:19 PM
granted but it has no roof

I wish my eyesight wasn't failing.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 19, 2012, 09:50:32 AM
Granted, but a pirate superglues two eyepatches to your eyes.

I wish for Benedict Cumberbatch
<3
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 19, 2012, 10:04:17 PM
Granted but you only get him 2000 years from now when he is just bones.

I wish the room would stop spinning.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 20, 2012, 10:31:34 AM
( >.> well i do like a good bone )

Granted, but the room is now a bouncy castle

I wish I had more shelves for my books.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 20, 2012, 08:34:59 PM
 ;)

Granted but the shelves are so big you can't fit them through your place.

I wish I had a peach.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on May 20, 2012, 08:39:17 PM
Quote from: Malachite on May 20, 2012, 08:34:59 PM
I wish I had a peach.
Granted, but Bowser comes along and takes it to another castle.

I wish I had a mocha.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 20, 2012, 09:08:07 PM
Granted but it spills in your lap.

I wish our toilet was fixed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 21, 2012, 08:11:15 AM
Granted, but it is fixed in reverse

I wish i owned a waterstones
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 21, 2012, 09:12:04 AM
Granted but no one buys from it so you have to shut it down.


I wish I was over 6 feet tall.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 22, 2012, 03:16:09 PM
Granted, you are a Yeti.

I wish it wasnt so hot
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 22, 2012, 05:47:56 PM
Granted.  Now you are an ugly person.

I wish I wasn't as hungry.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ffern on May 23, 2012, 02:18:08 PM
Granted, full frontal lobotomy, now you don't feel  anthing. Including hunger ^^^

I wish i was more punctual
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 04, 2012, 10:27:06 PM
You are so puntcual that you arrive at work just in time for it to be hit by a meteorite. A minute late, and you'd have been spared a squishin'.

I wishI had more soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 04, 2012, 11:19:57 PM
Granted but it's flat with chewed bubble gum in it.

I wish my tooth wasn't broken.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 06, 2012, 01:27:32 AM
Granted. It's in perfect condition, except it's not in your mouth anymore.

I wish I had a rapier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 06, 2012, 06:35:48 AM
Granted. Unfortunately your opponent has a sub-machinegun.

I wish I had a nice bottle of wine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kelly J. P. on June 06, 2012, 06:39:20 AM
 Granted. Unfortunately, the bottle of wine comes with a date from a gross >-bleeped-<->-bleeped-<.

I wish I had C-sized naturally-grown boobs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on June 06, 2012, 06:42:56 AM
Granted.  You can now model for a new painting of "Madonna with the Three Boobies",
as in " 'allo, 'allo".

I wish I had size D naturally grown boobs.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kelly J. P. on June 06, 2012, 06:45:43 AM
 Granted. The dark, coarse, naturally-grown hair on them is "D-sized" too.

I wish for more wishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 06, 2012, 08:50:27 AM
Granted but you can only wish for melted ice cream.

I wish we had two bathrooms in the house.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on June 06, 2012, 11:22:34 AM
Granted. They're both permanently clogged and/or leaky.

I wish the rest of my schooling was paid for.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 06, 2012, 12:33:23 PM
Granted but you can't find any job in you field of study now.

I wish I was a worm living inside of a tree.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 07, 2012, 12:35:42 AM
Your very odd request is granted- you are a worm living inside a tree. But the tree is getting cut down, and there's a lot of hungry-looking birds out there... Have fun! ^_^

I wish I had a 3DS!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 07, 2012, 12:42:29 AM
Granted.  You are now the owner of a 3DS that has been dipped in toilet water and ran over by a truck.

I wish I could lose weight in my sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 07, 2012, 12:56:31 AM
Granted but only lose muscle mass for weight loss.


I wish I could afford bottom surgery.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 07, 2012, 01:02:00 AM
Granted but all of the bottom surgery surgeons in the world retire so it doesn't make a difference.

I wish I was a tapeworm melting in acid.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kelly J. P. on June 08, 2012, 12:21:17 AM
 Granted! Unfortunately, it's a very weak acid, so your death is going to last for a verrrry long time!

I wish for money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 08, 2012, 12:25:49 AM
Granted.  You now have all the money you desire but everything has went to a bartering system so it's no good.

I wish I was a cheesecake ready to be eaten at a fancy restaurant.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 08, 2012, 01:15:15 AM
Granted. Unfortunately, an incompetent waiter sets you down in a chair for a moment, and you are sat on.

I wish my hair didn't grow so quickly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 08, 2012, 01:21:59 AM
Granted.  It doesn't grow at all now.

I wish I was a movie star.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 10, 2012, 03:27:54 AM
Granted. Pohotographers are now photographing you as you sleep, and news that you still sleep with a teddy bear nearly ruin your career.

I wish I had my teddy bear right now... T_T
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on June 11, 2012, 05:11:26 PM
Granted. It eats your soul with extra mustard.

I wish for uncorruptible wishes  >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 11, 2012, 05:19:13 PM
Granted.  You now have a coupon for uncorruptible wishes.  It expired yesterday though. 

I wish my root canal healed up completely
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 12, 2012, 02:46:45 AM
Granted, but now it needs to be re-opened, 'cause the dentist left a scalpet... in your tooth... somehow.

I wish I had more time to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 12, 2012, 02:53:58 AM
Granted.  You have more time to sleep however you sleep so much now that you missed out on life.

I wish I had baked cookies.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jumpingcats on June 12, 2012, 05:40:33 AM
Granted but they are made out of sand and have turned into glass after getting baked.

I wish I owned a car.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 12, 2012, 01:21:39 PM
Granted but it's a toy car with no wheels.

I wish the buses ran at night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 14, 2012, 12:28:01 AM
Granted, but their wonky schedules mean that you still can't catch one on time.

I wish I had something to fix my aching body.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 14, 2012, 12:46:12 AM
Granted.  You have a bottle of Bayer rub to put over your sore body.  Too bad it's empty.

I wish I was a stripper pole.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on June 14, 2012, 05:17:30 PM
Granted. You're made out of jello and fall apart.

I wish I could dance.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 14, 2012, 05:34:52 PM
Granted but you can only dance in your sleep.

I wish I was a fish swimming in Puerto Rico with a school of fish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 17, 2012, 12:57:15 AM
Granted, but your school is full of delinquents who try to get high by seeing who can stay out of water the longest. You stay out too long, get turned into a taco, and are really quite tasty.

I wish I didn't have to do homework.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 17, 2012, 01:38:32 AM
Granted.  You have no more homework but your tests become harder.

I wish I was a shard of glass.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 17, 2012, 11:12:11 PM
Granted. Unfortunately you ended up on a beack, where the wave action eroded you back to the quartz from which you came.

I wish I was a Rock Star
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 17, 2012, 11:26:55 PM
Granted, but your fame and fortune leads to drugs, and you die at the age of 27.

I wish I knew what I want to eat for dinner.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 17, 2012, 11:34:39 PM
Granted. Eventually you chose a Porterhouse steak with mushroom sauce. Regrettably the mushrooms were of the poisonous variety and you died a slow agonising death.

I wish I was a Princess in a castle waiting for my Prince Charming to resue me
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 17, 2012, 11:38:13 PM
Granted.  Prince Charming has been eaten by the fire-breathing dragon that was in his path so you will be waiting forever. 

I wish I could see a gender therapist.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 18, 2012, 04:30:24 AM
Granted. And after only 3 months accelerated treatment, you received approval for all your transition needs, won Lotto which financed everything for you. Regrettable you had to be teleported to the moon, as he was the only therapist available on short notice. The good news was that you lived happily ever after

I wish I was an Eskimo
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 18, 2012, 03:51:22 PM
(That had to be the best corrupted wish ever.   :D )

Granted.  You was an Eskimo....until the nice polar bear came by and decided he needed a snack.

I wish I had a beard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 18, 2012, 08:45:31 PM
Granted. Regrettably you had an adverse reaction to some of your recent forays into cooking, causing a rapid hormonal imbalance. Your 'T' levels shot through the roof, reacting to form DHT, causing an instant shedding of your beard. Your beard immediately feel to the floor and was hastely gathered up by the mice at your feet, wisked away and turned into wigs for the laboratory mice on a sex change programme.

I wish I could write trash
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 18, 2012, 09:00:09 PM
Granted.  You write great trash but someone plagerizes your work and you get no credit for any of your work.

I wish I had some bubblegum.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Angelique1994 on June 18, 2012, 09:07:10 PM
granted. you get ur gum but its so old and so hard that it breaks ur teeth lol.

i wish i was the prettiest girl alive
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 18, 2012, 09:12:12 PM
Granted.  You are the last person alive so there's no one else to compare yourself too.

I wish I had some grapefruit soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 18, 2012, 09:50:32 PM
Granted.   Regrettably there was a production error in the batch of soda you bought. The seeds were not filtered out. In the bottle you bought, the seeds took root, and grew into an enormous fruitless  grapefruit tree, absorbing all the remaining fluid. So you never got to drink it.  The manufacturer refused you compensation, sighting your story to be soooooo unbelievably false.

Fortunately living in South Australia, as you do, next door to Cindy, the GodMother, you are able to retrieve a 5 cent refund on the glass bottle.

I wish I was a Martian
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 18, 2012, 09:58:56 PM
Granted.  You are now a voice actress for a Martian in a video game that got bad reviews and didn't sell too well.

I wish I was a bucket of sand.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 12:01:16 AM
Granted.   Fortunately you ended up near the rock pool at the local beach. Children, being children, one child found you and immediately did what all kids do at the beach. Eat sand in vast quantities. The internal heat of the childs body slowly turned you into a looking glass, which you were for eternity, able to look at the image of the gorgeous man you became from eating that specially wished for sand.

As for the sand that wasn't eaten, I hear you ask? That was dumped by a Katrina style typhoon that came in after the kids had left the beach and it spead your remains to the 4 winds. In fact I think some ended up on Avoca Beach. Let go down and check out to see if some of you is still there. Won't be long. .......... 1 grain of sand, 2 grains of sand, 3 grains of sand, 4 grains of sand ...... No! Not so far, but there's a few more still to count.

I wish I was gnome
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 19, 2012, 12:09:18 AM
Granted.  You are the prettiest gnome sitting in the yard when the owner's dog knocked you over and shattered you to pieces.  Luckily though you were able to be pieced back together but you never looked the same as the glue and duct tape was visible.


I wish I was a tire for a truck.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 12:26:00 AM
Granted.   Unfortunately while crossing the state border the road nail strips were inadvertently activated. Not only did the explosive decompression that occurred rip into minute shreads, the rim that supported you was destroyed, causing you further demise. Fortunately a road sweeper was following you and it swept up your remains, sold them to a pencil factory where you were immediately transformed into a countless number of pencil erasers sitting a top of an eons supply of pencils for school childen in the milleniums to come.

I wish I was a Beauty Queen
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 19, 2012, 12:46:19 AM
Granted.  You are now the Beauty Queen of Australia and as the Beauty Queen you must give up all of your privacy and be photographed and video tapped 24/7  with no breaks.

I wish I was an ocean.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 11:20:08 AM
Granted.  Unfortunately as soon as your wish was granted, Global Warming kicked itself up a few notches, to the point all the oceans evaporated, all except for a little mud hole half the size of a duck pond, somewher in Texas (That's New South Wales Oz, not USA). Further componding your dilemma, the GFC leapt to an all new dimension due to the Greek bail out (no pun intended, or offered) and not one nation could rub 2 bob (20 cents AUD) together to finance a programme to de-evaporate you. Sadly you ended up floating round the ether (whatever that is) all misty.

I wish I was a yellow Leprechaun
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 19, 2012, 11:23:48 AM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 11:20:08 AM
Granted.  Unfortunately as soon as your wish was granted, Global Warming kicked itself up a few notches, to the point all the oceans evaporated, all except for a little mud hole half the size of a duck pond, somewher in Texas (That's New South Wales Oz, not USA). Further componding your dilemma, the GFC leapt to an all new dimension due to the Greek bail out (no pun intended, or offered) and not one nation could rub 2 bob (20 cents AUD) together to finance a programme to de-evaporate you. Sadly you ended up floating round the ether (whatever that is) all misty.

I wish I was a yellow Leprechaun

Granted. ^.^ but I'm sorry, the leprechaun is rabid and ate your pot of gold and the rabies reversed the good luck and now you only have bad luck. And the yellow was vomit.

I wish I was smart
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 11:38:27 AM
(oh dear god. Malachite has been cloned as jasper 3. Where will this end. Apart from trouble on all fronts)

Granted.  Due to the enormous international brain drain brought on by both global warming and the GFC, notwithstanding the Greek scenario, there was insufficient evidence OR proof that the wish in fact ever worked. A ruling from the international smart committee stated that assumption were not admissable. So ....................  tough luck eh?

I wish I was an amoeba
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 19, 2012, 11:42:28 AM
Granted. But you live in a 2 year old's nose who is a picker and eater. It eats you on a booger and you obviously cannot live in the stomach with the hydrochloric acids. ^_^

I wish i had a flamethrower
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 19, 2012, 11:55:21 AM
Granted.   This was the winning prize you received from a television game show. Regrettably its delivery was delayed, finally being hand delivered by DHL. You unfortunately were a keynote speaker at a fire convention when DHL delivered the flamethrower to you on stage. Where upon the organising committee immediately extinguished your speech (pardon the pun) and your membership to the organisation was burnt.

I wish I was a little twinkling star
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 19, 2012, 12:04:18 PM
Granted. ^_^
Ooh but Lex Luther blew up that star; superman was too late, sorry <3

I wish I had a dog
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 19, 2012, 02:35:05 PM
Granted.  You are the the new proud owner of a stuffed animal dog with no legs or head with the cotton spilling out.


I wish trash cans smelled like peaches.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 20, 2012, 08:00:19 AM
Granted.   As you were rummaging through the bin looking for the illusive peaches, the garbage truck arrived, scooped you up and compacted you into a cube of recyclable rubbish, which was later sold to China. Upon landing in China you were immediately shredded into Bock Choi ingredients, eaten by the local peasentry without ever tasting those bloody peaches.

I wish I was the Queen of England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales, including the Commonwealth
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 20, 2012, 08:06:48 AM
Granted. :)
But unfortunately, the next in line for the throne assassinates you.

I wish I was a marionette
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 20, 2012, 08:35:13 AM
Granted.  However your evil step sister comes to your opening performance and cuts all your string, where upon you end a matted heap on the floor.

I wish I was "Tinker Bell"
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 20, 2012, 08:38:13 AM
Granted. :D
But the kids don't believe and you die :'( (sorry I'm a morbid kinda humour guy) :3

I wish I was a beautician :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 20, 2012, 08:46:38 AM
Granted.  Just as you receive your certification, the Hendra virus mutates and infects all humanity within 24 hours, even before you finalise your lease for your beauty palour. Leaving no one but yourself to beautify.

I wish I was the pirate Capt Hook
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 20, 2012, 08:52:01 AM
Ooh .. Can't-- get away from.. MIRROR!!!!! My hairrrrr!!!!!!

Ok you're Captian hook :) but..  :o peter pan went too far and ... Sorry now you can be Captian HOOKS ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 20, 2012, 12:18:23 PM
Quote from: jasper3 on June 20, 2012, 08:52:01 AM
Ooh .. Can't-- get away from.. MIRROR!!!!! My hairrrrr!!!!!!

Ok you're Captian hook :) but..  :o peter pan went too far and ... Sorry now you can be Captian HOOKS ;D

Where's the wish? >.>
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 20, 2012, 12:20:56 PM
I always forget the wish and have to edit it back in lol I guess I forgot to
I guess uh..
I wish the sun was blue
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 20, 2012, 12:25:32 PM
Granted.  The sun is now blue but everything else is blue too so it doesn't stand out as much.

I wish I had more video games.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 20, 2012, 09:41:24 PM
Granted.  And as soon as you opened the first of uber many video game boxes a solar flare hit earth, knocking out the entire power grid forever and destroyed all batteries. You are now the proud owner of mega tones of useless plastic.

I wish I married Hugh Jackman    (ooooooooooohhh H U G H   J A C K M A N  Swoooooon)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 20, 2012, 10:23:40 PM
Granted.  You are now married to Hugh Jackman but he has been called up to do a mission on the moon that will take 40 years so you won't get to see him for a while. 

I wish I had a philly cheesesteak with some curly fries.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 20, 2012, 10:46:15 PM
Granted.

Unbeknown to you though the cheese was old and full of salmanella, the beef was from a cow with foot in mouth disease, which in fact curled the fries. (Silly you. You should have seen the writing on the wall). You then spent the best part of your life in hospital with your feet in your mouth, trying to recover from salmonall poisioning. Remember you are on a diet now. Shouldn't be sneaking out for these quickies now, should we?

I wish I was a magic fairy, and granted everyones wish (especially yours)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 20, 2012, 11:11:59 PM
Who knew that breaking diets could be so painful?

Granted.  You are able to grant everyone's wish especially mine but with all the magic power it took you had to change a fee of 7 million dollars per wish and no one could afford that so it's like the wishes never happened.



I wish I had a milkshake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 03:37:47 AM
Granted.     The milkbar attendent was just about to put your milkshake in the mixer, when, yes you guessed it, the world was struck by yet another solar flare, knocking out the power grid forever. The only solution left was when a fitness studio learnt of your plight and offered you the use of a solar powered belt massager. This worked to a degree but unfortunately not being able to see what was happening in your stomach, the milk curdled, causing an immediate case of salmonella poisioning, resulting in death. There is a silver lining to this wish, and that is during the autopsy, they discovered some butter in your stomach which was offered to a childrens orphanage. Sorry.

I wish I was a grain of rice
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 03:48:04 AM
Granted but there were hungry Asians (sorry if is is offensive to any Asians here)

I wish I was a car which couldn't crash, burn, or in any case be damaged even by an apocalyptic chaos and I kept the people and food, vegetation and animals and water alike, safe from harm. :P

Hehe >:-) I made a hard one to corrupt
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 04:26:50 AM
Granted.  You are a now a drawing of a car that couldn't crash, burn, or in any case be damaged even by an apocalyptic chaos and everything is save from harm.  That drawing was thrown in the trash however.


I wish Black Friday was here already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 04:29:25 AM
Grr I didn't think of that lol

Granted. The sun on Friday was black :P

(don't know what black Friday is lol)

I wish I knew what black Friday was :3
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 04:36:03 AM
Granted but now you have to take an extra minute or two out of your life that you can never get back to read what it is  >:-)

"Black Friday is the day following Thanksgiving Day in the United States, traditionally the beginning of the Christmas shopping season. On this day, most major retailers open extremely early, often at 4 a.m., or earlier, and offer promotional sales to kick off the shopping season, similar to Boxing Day sales in many Commonwealth Nations. Black Friday is not actually a holiday, but some non-retail employers give their employees the day off, increasing the number of potential shoppers. It has routinely been the busiest shopping day of the year since 2005,[1] although news reports, which at that time were inaccurate,[2] have described it as the busiest shopping day of the year for a much longer period of time.[3]

The day's name originated in Philadelphia, where it originally was used to describe the heavy and disruptive pedestrian and vehicle traffic which would occur on the day after Thanksgiving.[4][5] Use of the term started before 1961 and began to see broader use outside Philadelphia around 1975. Later an alternative explanation began to be offered: that "Black Friday" indicates the point at which retailers begin to turn a profit, or are "in the black".[4][6]

For many years, it was common for retailers to open at 6:00 AM, but in the late 2000s many had crept to 5:00 or even 4:00. This was taken to a new extreme in 2011, when several retailers (including Target, Kohls, Macy's, Best Buy, and Bealls[7]) opened at midnight for the first time."


Source: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Friday_(shopping) (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Friday_(shopping))



I wish I had a trampoline.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 04:50:44 AM
Ah see here we have Black Beach that (I don't mean to be offensive to African Americans or native Africans or other "black" ethnicities) black people go annually and most shootings and crimes happen
Idk much about it but that's what I hear on the news and from teachers and students (southern mississippi)

Granted but while jumping, you go too far and hit the outer most edge of the trampoline while still on it, and your ankle gets trapped in between the springs and gets fractured by the pressure and angularity of the springs and metal and they have to amputate your foot so you spend the rest of your life in a wheel chair

I wish I had a t-Rex xD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 04:57:09 AM
Granted but it is only the fossils of a T-Rex

I wish I had a bacon cheeseburger with monzerella cheese.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 05:06:12 AM
How is that corrupting my wish? That's still cool, they can go for lots of money lol  :eusa_dance:

Granted but the cheese, beef, and pork is infected with trichinosis, bovine spongiform encephalopathy, and listeria monocytogenes and those diseases and bacterial and viral infections infect eachother and your body absorbs these diseases and you..  :icon_blah:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 05:08:44 AM
well uh...the fossils were made of plastic then  >:-)

Where's your wish again? lol
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 05:12:52 AM
Grrr I hate my memory lol
I can remember hundred of muscles, specific lymph and blood vessels, specific lobes and cavities of the body and even parts of the brain and the processes and even all the scientific names of all 206 bones in the adult human body and even the variants in the infant but I can't remember to do other things  :icon_redface:

Uhm I wish I had a new shoe.. Yes a said shoe, singular *looks at my burnt converse on the floor* .. Yes.. Singular
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 05:17:28 AM
Granted but it's in the wrong size.

I wish my knee didn't itch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 05:18:29 AM
Granted, it's been amputated   >:-)

I wish I was a bird lol
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 05:26:51 AM
Granted.  The next day a stray cat caught you and then ate you for dinner.

I wish I was a melted worm.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 05:29:17 AM
O.o uhm... *thinking* ... Uh a little kid was dared to eat you?

I wish I was a regular worm haha
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 08:43:21 AM
Granted. Immediately you were seen in the garden by a keen fisherman, who snapped you up and threaded a hook through you and used  you as bait to catch a fish.

I wish I was SuperWoman



@ Malachite. I think it wise for you to eat before you return. Each time you wish for food, it appears you die very shortly afterwards. Just a thought. You might like dying.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 08:46:25 AM
Granted. Superman declined your offer to take him out on a date (you asked cuz you're superwoman and Amazonians are in dependant, strong women) but still, you don't have a date lol

I wish I was a hamburger (@ Malachite. I think it wise for you to eat before you return. Each time you wish for food, it appears you die very shortly afterwards. Just a thought. You might like dying.)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 08:57:58 AM
Granted.   By the law of averages, you become a Big Mac. Ordered by a 4 yo snotted nosed kid, who takes one look at you, pukes all over you and subsequently, you are immediately thrown in the garbage. Fortunately there is a silver lining to this wish. A garbage truck appears minutes after your demise and you are whisked away to a recycling plant and are converted into garden waste where you are absorbed into a wheat plant. At harvest time your seed is sold to Goodman Fielders to be made into hamburger buns, while a cow eats the husk and stalk, dies later and becomes a meat patty for Maccas. So you are reborn as a hamburger. Regrettably your bun was not matched to the beef patty. You then lived the remainder of your life out the back store room of Maccas receiving counseling. It's a Maccas policy not to sell psychologically damaged products

I wish I was a little flower in the garden

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 09:03:51 AM
Wow lol

Granted I empty my horse's manure on your head.

I wish i had $1million
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 09:11:18 AM
Granted.  Due to unseen problems with the GFC including the Greek bail out, and Global Warming, the dollar fell to an all time low of minus $!.50 in the dollar. You now owe the Government 1.5 million dollars, payable immediately, otherwise it's the firing squad for you dear Sir.

What Global Warming actually had to do with your wish, hasn't been established beyond reasonable doubt prior to publication. The back office is frantically working on some lame excuse, so please watch this space in the future. It may end up being just that ..... space...... blank

I wish I had a rum & raisin ice cream that NEVER ran out
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 09:16:05 AM
Granted but you now you have alcoholic liver poisoning from the rum

I wish I could go back to cosmetology school :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 09:21:28 AM
Granted.  However since it's been a while since you last attended. A quasar expoded, creating one holy enormously big (and I mean BIG) black hole that everything, and I mean EVERYTHING was sucked into. Leaving ABSOLUTELY nothing. Not even a thought was left behind, including the though you had this wish.

I wish I was a little pixie
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 09:26:53 AM
 :o

Granted but I caught you in a jar but I didn't know what pixies ate  :(

I wish I was a new born puppy going to live with rich people xD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 01:19:47 PM
Granted.  The rich people don't want you anymore so they give you away.  You still had a good home though but not to rich people.

I wish I wasn't tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 21, 2012, 01:25:27 PM
Granted. You have insomnia, you can't sleep but you aren't tired :P

I wish I was on a tv show
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 01:31:42 PM
Granted but it's only aired at 3 am and lasts 20 seconds and it got cancelled in two days.

I wish I had a biscuit.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 21, 2012, 07:50:12 PM
Granted. Being the Kings gate keeper to his castle, your main job is to be subservant to him. He wanted the draw bridge opened so he can go on a local crusade. While opening the draw bridge, the mice scurry into your tea room, spy the busciut and ravenously devour every last crumb. Fortunately there is a silver lining to this wish. On your return, because the mice are so fat from eating your biscuit, you catch them and BBQ them for lunch and getting the added protein as well as your biscuits, albeit slighty pre digested. Everyone lives happily ever after, except for the mice.
This in fact has repercussions in the Cinderella story, there is a shortage of mice footman, but that an altogether different story or wish.

I wish I was a turtle
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 21, 2012, 11:56:54 PM
Granted but you are captured and made into turtle stew.  However you werea poisionous turtle so everyone who ate you died.  Revenge Revenge!


I wish I was melted butter.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 22, 2012, 12:55:33 PM
Granted.   However the chef that created you from natural butter was inadvertently detained, you started to burn and evaporate away and by the time the chef returned there was nothing left of you. There is a silver lining to this wish. The chef then decided to replace you with olive oil which burns at a much higher heat than butter, which allowed him to complete his recipe which was to be served to your idol. Thus restoring a smile to your face and knowing that good triumph's over evil

I wish I could live forever                         


(And if I don't go to bed soon I'll sleep forever, forever dreaming whether my wish was granted LOL)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 22, 2012, 03:28:43 PM
Granted but you have to live by yourself on the moon forever.

I wish I wasn't as sleepy lol.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 23, 2012, 05:16:58 AM
Granted.   However, you ended up staying awake for soooooooo long, you forgot how to sleep and kept disturbing  your household to the point they threw you out. Regrettable due to a housing shortage, there is NO silver lining to this wish. It just ended in tragedy. Sorry.

I wish I was the pumpkin that was changed into Cinderellas coach the night of the ball; and then I grew up to be the Queen cornation coach.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 23, 2012, 06:45:54 AM
Granted.  You go to sleep dreaming that you were the pumpkin that  was changed into Cinderellas coach the night of the ball and that you eventually grew up to be the Queen cornation coach but when you wake up you become depressed that the dream wasn't real.

I wish I had blue eyes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 23, 2012, 07:17:31 AM
Granted.    However this causes one enormous, regrettable, unfortunate, horrific, unbelievable, unthinkable, (supercalafragilisticexpeladocious. Sorry, I've wanted to use this word for months now, and I haven't found an appropriate thread to put it in, not that I ever thought I would. But it has to be used before its expiry date. It has absolutely nothing to do with your wish, so don't be alarmed or concerned. It's quite harmless, and safe for the kiddies) (I feel better now.) Back to the wish.
and horrendous (I hope you're still here) effect. You can now only see things that are blue. Like the sea and the sky. At your feet is the largest gold nugget, even larger than Mt Everest, ever to be found. You unfortunately can't see it, nor cash it in to pay for everything your heart has ever desired. You fall over it, hitting your head, causing immediate death, by concussion.

I wish I was a fairy with a magic wand
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 23, 2012, 09:10:02 AM
Granted but you're caught by mr Crocker, sorry: http://fairlyoddparents.wikia.com/wiki/Denzel_Crocker (http://fairlyoddparents.wikia.com/wiki/Denzel_Crocker) just in case you don't know the show

I wish I was a dragon!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 23, 2012, 01:22:31 PM
granted but you can't breath fire or fly and you are only 2 inches long and 4 inches wide

I wish I had an energy drink
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 24, 2012, 11:44:05 AM
Granted.

However the energy drink concentrated way too much energy in your solar plexus, (where ever & whatever that is  ??? ;D ) which changed you into a hairy gorilla in the depths of the Congo jungle (which BTW is rapidly disappearing, nothing to do with your wish apparently), where upon you were immediately and fatally shot by elephant tusk hunters.

I wish I was a little cup cake with with icing & 100's & 1,000's sprinkled on top
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 24, 2012, 01:31:14 PM
Granted but you are made out of hamburger meat with mustard for icing and dirt for sprinkles.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 24, 2012, 11:36:49 PM
Ah - hum. Do we have a Royal Wish that requires corrupting perchance?

Huggs
Catherine
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 12:42:39 AM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on June 24, 2012, 11:36:49 PM
Ah - hum. Do we have a Royal Wish that requires corrupting perchance?

Huggs
Catherine

Ooops lol sorry.  I was really tired that day.  >.> Silly me.


I wish I would have wrote my wish earlier. 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on June 25, 2012, 03:25:47 AM
Granted. This means that you spend a couple more minutes on the computer, during which time your PC is infected with viruses that download such disgusting porns that you vomit all over your computer and have to dip into your savings to buy a new one.

I wish I could afford the new Kingdom Hearts game. And the 3DS to play it on.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 25, 2012, 03:30:50 AM
Granted but they were sold out so you decided to give the money you acquired somehow to charity. :) (not all bad, eh?)

I wish I had a cool silver and black  cane!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 04:10:23 AM
Granted but it's two inches long.

I wish I was on a train.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 25, 2012, 09:23:11 AM
Granted
Unfortunately this train was on a siding with a broken set of points. So you never really moved, which sort of negates the whole wish

I wish I was a lion trainer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 12:30:37 PM
Granted but every lion you have to train just prefers to lay around and sleep so you get frustrated and quit. 

I wish I had longer and skinnier legs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 25, 2012, 06:04:49 PM
Granted, you starve yourself in hopes of your legs becoming skinnier and longer but your anorexia only caused your feet to become skinnier and longer. Everyone makes fun of you so you never go outside and whenever you look in the mirror you can only help but to tape a picture of long, skinny legs to each shin.

I wish I was a guitarist.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 06:11:48 PM
Granted but everyone else including yourself suddenly goes deaf so no one can hear you play.

I wish I had wings.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 25, 2012, 08:50:10 PM
Granted.
As soon as they sprout you are caught up in a Katrina style hurricane which not only blows then off, you are blown away beyond the fartherest land, turning into a fire breathing dragon, without wings.

I wish it was summer so I no longer freeze when I go to the beach (Oh god here we go) looking for oysters (I must be pregnant)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 09:03:20 PM
Granted.  However it's so hot that you won't feel like going to the beach and all the oysters melt.

I wish I was made out of a rock
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 25, 2012, 09:12:18 PM
Granted.
Immediately you are seen by a road construction company and are hauled away to a rock crusher where you are pulverised into dust to be mixed with concrete for road base.

I wish all the poor and starving people in the world; WEREN'T                 



(Sorry this wish can only have a happy ending)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 09:24:34 PM
Granted but you had to sacrifice you life in order for your wish to happen.  At least you made millions of people happy. 

I wish I had bigger muscles.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 25, 2012, 09:36:24 PM
Granted.
After an amazing session at the local gym, you developed biceps so large that it was impossible for you to move unaided. A local touring circus troupe saw you and thought you'd be an ideal side show attraction. They took you on and billed you as the hairiest man in town. The hair was obviously a by product of the excessive muscle mass.

I wish I was a famous brain surgeon
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 09:52:13 PM
Granted.  You were famous for so many law practice lawsuits because of the damage you did  so you had to flee to another country to save yourself from the people with pitch forks.

I wish I was a bucket of paint.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 25, 2012, 10:02:10 PM
Granted
You were a very special bucket of paint, specially mixed for Royality, and you were duplicated and used through the land to everyones joy and delight. Unfortunately you were missing a vital ingredient that when you wre exposed to sunlight, you changed into the ugliest mission brown colour that made everyone so angry tht you were stripped from the land and recycled into fertilizer

I wish I was a Brides Maid
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 25, 2012, 10:18:51 PM
Granted but you overslepted and missed the wedding you were supposed to be a part of.

I wish I had a bucket of money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on June 26, 2012, 08:40:36 AM
Granted, but it's the zombie apocalypse and there's nowhere to spend all the cash!

I wish I could see without glasses.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 26, 2012, 08:42:19 AM
Granted, but you have to wear contacts instead of glasses and they make your eyes red and watery and irritable.

I wish I had a better job than cleaning rich people's toilets.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 26, 2012, 03:57:48 PM
Granted.  You are now cleaning rich people's underwear.

I wish my kitten wasn't so clingy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: jasper3 on June 26, 2012, 04:39:44 PM
As long as they're sexy people's underwear ;) haha kidding.

Granted. Your kitten is now trapped in a cage 24/7 and watered by a gerbil's water bottle and feed like fish, by opening a tiny opening of the cage and dropping the food in. At least it isn't clingy now. :(

I wish I could donate my house to St. Jude's hospital, it is a local hospital for children and cancer research (my dad won't let me lol)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 26, 2012, 04:52:27 PM
Granted but it crumbles into pieces before it could be used for good.

I wish I had a pool in my yard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: EmmaMcAllister on June 26, 2012, 04:57:51 PM
Granted, but it's an inflatable kiddie pool with a pinhole leak you can't seem to find.

I wish I lived in Montreal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 26, 2012, 05:00:26 PM
Granted but a big storm came just as you moved in and destroyed everything in it's path making it all rubble.


I wish I had a shoelace
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 26, 2012, 09:10:56 PM
Granted.
Unfortunately it came undone without you noticing and you tripped over it, falling on your head and losing your memory. You then weren't able to remember your wish and bought slip on shoes

I wish I was going on a picnic this weekend
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 26, 2012, 10:20:25 PM
Granted but as soon as you get your picnic ready it pours down raining hard but to your luck it's raining oysters.

I wish I had duct tape.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 27, 2012, 06:55:08 AM
YUMMMMM!!!

Best time to go to the beach, is when it's raining. Everyone packs up and goes home. I have absolutely no idea why. You get wet when you go in the water at the beach, what's the problem with the rain?

Granted.
You receive that much duct tape (the fairies were in a good mood) that you are inundated with it. Being a hot and summery day the glue holding the duct tape starts to melt, slowing embalming you in this enormous sea of duct tape. By the time the authorities can attempt to rescue you, it's all too late. The temperature dropped and the duct tape congealed into a solid mass.

I wish I was a famous actor
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 27, 2012, 07:02:56 AM
Granted.  However every movie and tv show you are in had low ratings and you were deemed a horrible actor.

I wish I had a loaded shotgun.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 27, 2012, 07:20:05 AM
Granted.

This loaded shotgun was a family heirloom, and was held with high esteem within the local community. Even to the extent one day each year the local community would pronounce a special holiday to venerate this shot gun.

As the day drew near you took the loaded shot gun down to polish and get it ready for the mighty occasion. (Even the Pope would leave Rome for this event) In the process of cleaning it, the safety catch accidentally disengaged. Not noticing it when you were about to return the shotgun to its glass case, your hand slipped on the highly polished barrel. Fumbling to catch it you accidentally pulled the trigger, discharging both barrels into the china cabinet, totally destroying Auntie Gertrude's Royal Doulton china dinner set worth 800 million trillion dollars.

I wish (with what I know today) I was a little boy again.                             





(god how things would be different today
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 27, 2012, 09:24:59 PM
Granted but you were attacked by a wolf so you were scared for life afterwards.

I wish I wasn't tired.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 27, 2012, 10:05:55 PM
Granted.
And this wish came with special powers that gave you the ability to grant wishes to everyone in the world, and do so much good. The corrupt part of the wish is about to commence, so go get your popcorn now, I'll wait ...........

Unfortunately, sleep deprivation caused you to die all too young. How must of a miserable sod are you?  :laugh:   :laugh:  If you'd just gone to bed earlier, YOU could have saved the world.

I wish I was a hairpin
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 27, 2012, 10:29:57 PM
Granted but someone broke you in half and ran over it with a truck so you are never used.

I wish I had sweet potato pie.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 28, 2012, 11:11:17 AM
Granted.

And what a sweet potato pie it was. End of wish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 28, 2012, 11:24:53 AM
Now for the evil, mean, nasty and corrupt part of the wish.

After eating it, the sweet potato reacted with your digestive juices, together with the pastry and created an enormous balloon inside you. It became sooooooo big you floated skyward without any control whatsoever. You were at the mercy of the wind.

You floated so high you entered commercial airspace, were duly noted on radar and as you didn't have a transponder to squawk your identification, the USAF were scrambled immediately thinking you were a terrorist attack. The pilot who saw you couldn't believe her eyes, you looked sooooo gorgeous, but orders are orders. She locked on you, her target and deployed the missiles in order to avert a tragedy. You unfortunatelywere blown to smithereens at 38,000 feet.

The silver lining to this evil corruptness is, your remains settled in a paddock and was used as good fertilizer.

I wish I was genius
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 28, 2012, 04:10:14 PM
Granted but you have memory loss so you don't remember anything at all.

I wish I was beach sand.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 29, 2012, 12:55:48 AM
Hummmmmm ...............................      Granted

However failing to hear the local weather forecast and the impending doom of yet another Katrina style hurricane/ typhoon, you are quickly sucked up into the hurricanes vortex. The heat is soooo immense that you are immediately transformed in from of your own eyes (if sand had eyes) into the largest sheet of glass EVER known to mankind.

Regrettable as the storm lost its veracity, you fell to earth shattering into thousands of tons of sand, upon some unsuspecting farmers paddock. Sorry. due to the strike at Fairfax's paper, there is No sliver lining OR moral to this wish. Stay tuned, same time same station next week for an update


I wish I was a black hole
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 29, 2012, 12:59:12 AM
Granted.  You are now a black hole that is stuffed with used toilet paper and wastes from tourists in the public bathrooms.

I wish I had a sand dollar.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 29, 2012, 01:17:38 AM
Granted         (I think. As fairy feverishly looks up Wiki leaks looking for definition of sand dollar.       I think I've found it)

Yes! Absolutely granted.

With the latest news from the stock market indicating the Aussie dollar has taken over world currency, including Greece's debt, but not the Italian's. The price of sand dollars falls to an all time low. So low in fact that anyone holding sand dollars has to pay the Aussie Govt. a zillion dollars every year, for eternity. You now declare yourself bankrupt and fly to Majorca to live a life of seclusion.

I wish i was Mary Poppins
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 29, 2012, 01:25:11 AM
Granted.  You just happen to be a person named Mary Poppins and not the actual famous Mary Poppins.

I wish I had a water gun.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 29, 2012, 10:15:12 AM
Granted.

With the GFC and Climate Change in full swing, remembering that Greece has gone bust, hotly persued by Italy (Not really sure why they get a mention. We may find out later) all the water drys up and even if there was money available, you still couldn't afford to buy water that wasn't for sale. So the joy and delight of this little ditti is you have your water pistol, but no water.

The silver lining in this story is, if you said yes to NPTP topic, drinks Coca cola, you could put that in the pistol and shoot everyone with Cola. Well times are tough. Necessity is the mother of invention


I wish ............................... *Catherine hummmmmmmming again*  Nope !

I wish ......................... * Catherine behave yourself. Please. Stop thinking naughty thoughts*

I wish I was Julia Gillard, Prime Minister of Oz
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 29, 2012, 07:34:20 PM
Granted.  You are now Julia Gillard.  You celebrate by going sailing on a boat but you wind up stranded and wrecked on an island and everyone eventually forgot about you.

I wish I had a great career.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 01:33:21 PM
Granted.

And when you look deeply into the reasons you now have that great career, you'll find the corruptness. And it wasn't on your behalf, just let it be known that good DOES triumph over  >:-)    :laugh: :laugh:  Got cha!!

I wish I was a tragedienne
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 07:36:32 PM
Granted.  However everytime you come on stage people boo you and throw rotton tomatos at your face forcing you into an early retirement.

I wish I was a tapeworm inside of a human.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 07:44:12 PM
Granted

You however grow to epic proportions, even taking on the persona of your host, (you predator!). You then start to procreate, which initially gone on undetected by the National Medical Authority, until it is too late and a new generation of life size tapeworms take over the world. Fortunately some space dust falls from the sky, which in fact is a mutated disease that you have no resistance against. The disease spreads at pandemic speed and proportions. So much so that everything dies befor ............................................
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 07:47:08 PM
Where's your wish? lol
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 07:48:56 PM
NEWS FLASH   NEWS FLASH

We interrupt this thread with an urgent news item.
The author of the previous thread has died suddenly. In her last will and testament the following instruction was found and will now be duly carried out.Normal programmes will resume shortly

"I wish I was Cinderella on my way to the ball"



Even later breaking news.

It was the author previous to the pushy individual who jumped in ahead of time above who died.  :laugh:  :laugh: ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 07:57:09 PM
Granted.  On the way to the ball the horses went crazy and ran you into a lake.  You had to walk the rest of the way and by the time you got there the ball was over.

I wish I had sweat on my face.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 08:20:03 PM
NOT granted!!!!


Oh alright.  .........  I'll grant it just this once. But don't make a habit of it. After all you've been doing a lot of hard work today.

And in your haste to clean yourself up you start to shave the stubble from your face. The razor encounters the first patch of perspiration, slips with remarkable ease, causing you inadvertently slit your juggler vein causing you to bleed profusely. Fortunately a neighbour seeing your plight, immediately applies a pressure point and rushes you to hospital saving your life.

I wish I was SuperWoman
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 08:36:26 PM
Granted.  However her weakness was oysters and if she were to eat one she would lose her superpowers forever.   >:-)

A habit you say....hmmmmm well I wish my shirt was drenched in sweat.  :)

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 09:10:23 PM
ABSOLUTELY NOT!!

Oh well *sigh* all.....right I did say don't make a habit of it.

Granted   (under duress)

Having finished all your hard work that created this situation, you were unaware of a sudden weather cold snap coming over the range. It hit with such speed and voracity that it caught you unawares. You, having no other protective clothing immediately develop a cold of mammoth proportions and have to spend the rest of the year in bed.

See, you should have listened to your mother, and this wouldn't of happened if you'd taken you galoshes.

I wish I was as ugly as the 3 sisters put together.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 09:14:46 PM
Granted.  You were so ugly that everyone wanted to take a picture of you.  You eventually got mad and punched a papparazi in the face landing you 7 years in the slammer.

I wish I had a bottle of soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2012, 10:00:22 PM
 :laugh:   :laugh:   :laugh:   :laugh:   :laugh:   :laugh:   :police:

Granted

When opening the soda bottle on such a hot day as it is, the bubbles went straight up your nose, causing you sneeze incessantly. So much so the soda bottle was shaken so much all of its contents were split on the hot pavement and evaporated immediately. Leaving you with all but an empty soda bottle.

Fortunately you had been visiting the GodMother in Adelaide at the time where they give you a 10 cent refund on the empty bottle. So all wasn't lost


I wish I had a teleporter
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on June 30, 2012, 10:04:38 PM
Granted.  Your teleport to the dinosaur ages when the teleporter breaks down to an unrepairable status.  Have with with the T-Rex over there.

I wish I had a Harley Davidson

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 01, 2012, 12:02:11 AM
Granted.                             Only if it has a side car (Yuck!! What an abomination)

In your haste to take it for a ride on Route 66, you inadvertently run over the fairy who granted the wish, without so much as a sorry, beg your pardon. Once the fairy is released from hospital some weeks later, she immediately dispatches the fairy  :police:  to hunt you down.

They finally discover you, lost somewhere in the middle of the Mojave desert, as you took a wrong turn at Albuquerque. The fairy spots you riding away into the sunset at terminal velocity, so she turns up the power of her magic wand, fires a bunch of wishes in your direction. You dive through a hail of wishes and come out the other side as a small monkey riding a matchbox size motor bike.


I wish I was a fairy who could grant everyones wishes
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 01, 2012, 12:03:57 AM
Granted but she died 4 years ago

I wish I didn't have a cheeseburger just now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: PrincessKnight on July 01, 2012, 03:02:20 AM
Granted. Instead, you have a used pregnancy test, and your hands are full, so you have to hold in in your mouth on the way to the trash can.

I wish I could get the new Kingdom Hearts game.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 01, 2012, 03:10:39 AM
Granted but you hate the game so much that you break your system out of fit of rage and regret it.

I wish I could lose weight easier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on July 01, 2012, 11:16:45 AM
Granted but the transplant doctors messed up and took more than just your kidney. You now weigh 87 lbs and fit a child's casket.


I wish for solvency.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 01, 2012, 05:16:22 PM
granted but it only lasts for a month

I wish I was on the moon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 02, 2012, 07:21:39 AM
Granted.
Unfortunately you didn't tell ANYONE  where you were going (dear oh dear. Don't you remember your Mother telling you that. I DO) And no matter how much jumping up and down or waving your hands, nobody sees you. You remain on the moon till you die. To which unfortunately, Richard Branson lands on the Moon the day after to set up Branson City. First intergalactic space rocket stop over for all those intergalactic transports

I wish I was clever girl
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 02, 2012, 03:04:33 PM
I remember too :p *always tell me where you are going* 


Granted but every other girl in the world is just as clever as you so it doesn't make a difference.



I wish I had more peaches.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 03, 2012, 10:21:11 AM
Granted.
You receive so many peaches that's it's impossible for you store, let alone eat. They slowly begin to rot, creating such a stench that it makes you so sick, you can't even think of eating one, let alone looking at one. Which defeated the whole purpose of the wish.

I wish I was a story book
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 03, 2012, 12:01:02 PM
Granted.    It's a boring story book though so not many people read it.

I wish my laptop was running correctly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on July 04, 2012, 03:01:07 PM
Granted. It runs so well, it decides to leave you behind & head to the Olympics and win a gold for the State of Tech. Doesn't even leave a note for you.

I wish chocolate was calorie-free.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 04, 2012, 04:31:16 PM
Granted but it tastes so bitter you don't want any.

I wish I had more arm hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 06, 2012, 11:48:10 AM
Granted.

However due to atmostpheric changes brought on by Global Warming and the GFC (not including the Greece bailout); the more you exposed yourself to the sunlight, the longer the hair became.  It grew sooooooo long that it took over your entire body, making you look like "Cousin It" in the Addams Family.

I wish a fairy had just granted me three wishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 06, 2012, 04:24:59 PM
Omg how is that a corrupted wish?   :P  That would be freaking awesome!

Granted.  However you were sleep when she arrived and you only dreamed that you asked for 3 wishes.  She waited for you but got tired of waiting and left.

I wish I had blue eyes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jasper on July 07, 2012, 10:01:58 AM
Granted. Your eyes are now blue but no one can see them because the entire planet has just gone blind. That sucks.

I wish my shoes never wore down.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 07, 2012, 11:37:57 AM
Granted but you misplace them and never find them again.

I wish I had sunglasses.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on July 13, 2012, 02:03:31 AM
Granted. They're garish, oversized and covered in spikes.

I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 13, 2012, 02:07:22 AM
Granted but gravity is 100000 times heavier now so you can't fly far.

I wish I had the video game "Sims: Castaway" again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on July 15, 2012, 03:23:03 AM
Granted. Your disc is fatally scratched.

I wish I could win a random giveaway.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 15, 2012, 03:25:59 AM
Granted but after taxes you wind up oweing money so it's not practical.

I wish I had a giant stack of gummie bears.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 15, 2012, 09:02:41 AM
Granted.

Unfortunately the sugars gummy bears are made out of creates it's own internal combustion, which causes them to melt into one hell of a gooey mess not fit for eating. The stench is pretty acrid too.


I wish my stocking didn't ladder
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 15, 2012, 01:40:26 PM
Granted.  Now you don't have legs so no need to worry about that.

I wish I had some juice.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on July 17, 2012, 03:29:18 PM
Granted. It's de-odorized moose juice  >:-)

I wish I always had someone nearby to cuddle with.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Constance on July 17, 2012, 03:37:30 PM
Quote from: Your Humble Savant on July 17, 2012, 03:29:18 PM
I wish I always had someone nearby to cuddle with.
Granted: It's Lord Voldemort

I wish I had a folding bike.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 17, 2012, 05:07:13 PM
Granted-it's missing wheels though and it's rusted

I wish I was happy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on July 25, 2012, 01:52:00 AM
Granted, but everyone else in unhappy and they constantly complain to you about all their problems, so you can't enjoy your happiness.

I wish I could afford that really cool pair of antique sunglasses I want.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 25, 2012, 02:41:03 AM
Granted but there are only one pair in existance and someone else has already gotten them.

I wish I was wide awake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on July 31, 2012, 08:13:43 PM
Quote from: Malachite on July 25, 2012, 02:41:03 AM
I wish I was wide awake.


Poof. You are now awake, and twelve feet wide.


I wish I could pen a best seller.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 31, 2012, 08:22:51 PM
Granted but you only can in your dreams.

I wish I had wings.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on July 31, 2012, 08:37:17 PM
Quote from: Malachite on July 31, 2012, 08:22:51 PM
I wish I had wings.


Ok. Here's your order. Unfortunately, the hot sauce is extra, and without it, your order of wings is tasteless.


I wish the summer were three months longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on July 31, 2012, 08:38:15 PM
Where's your wish?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 13, 2012, 01:18:58 PM
Granted, your summer is three months longer.
You get a sunburn for every extra day  >:-)

I wish it were easier to write good music.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on August 13, 2012, 09:52:34 PM
Granted, it's easier for everyone besides you.

I wish I could win a writing contest.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: justmeinoz on August 14, 2012, 04:42:18 AM
Granted. You win the National "Essay with the least connection to English Grammar"  Contest.

I wish I had another Blue Cheese.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 14, 2012, 09:38:11 PM
Granted. A family of weasels resides within.

I wish I had more tolerance for spicy foods.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 15, 2012, 05:43:05 AM
Quote from: Your Humble Savant on August 14, 2012, 09:38:11 PM
I wish I had more tolerance for spicy foods.

Enjoy your five-alarm chili without a tongue.

I wish I could read people's minds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on August 15, 2012, 04:30:35 PM
Granted. Everyone suddenly has vivid daydreams about having sex with you and you can't block them out.

I wish my school could actually give me the classes I wanted.  :eusa_wall:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 15, 2012, 07:36:46 PM
Quote from: Dante on August 15, 2012, 04:30:35 PM
Granted. Everyone suddenly has vivid daydreams about having sex with you and you can't block them out.

Actually that sounds like fun. I could cancel my subscriptions to all those porn sites.  >:-)

Quote from: Dante on August 15, 2012, 04:30:35 PM
I wish my school could actually give me the classes I wanted.  :eusa_wall:

Granted. Check out the course catalog for Fall 2018. They're all there.

I wish I could make the clothes I want instantly materialize in the right size, rather than having to go out shopping for them.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 16, 2012, 07:56:37 AM
Quote from: agfrommd on August 15, 2012, 07:36:46 PM

Actually that sounds like fun. I could cancel my subscriptions to all those porn sites.  >:-)
 
Granted. Check out the course catalog for Fall 2018. They're all there.

I wish I could make the clothes I want instantly materialize in the right size, rather than having to go out shopping for them.

Granted but now clothes are illegal to wear.

I wish I had some white chocolate cheesecake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 16, 2012, 11:12:59 AM
Granted. It's got a bleu cheese & ant filling.

I wish for wishes that cannot be corrupted  >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 16, 2012, 11:35:24 AM
Quote from: Your Humble Savant on August 16, 2012, 11:12:59 AM
I wish for wishes that cannot be corrupted  >:-)

Granted. Your 11,238th and 11,239th wishes will not be corrupted.

I wish there was less violence in movies and on TV.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 16, 2012, 01:58:43 PM
Granted but there is also a lot more sex in them now.

I wish I had a unicorn.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Elsa on August 16, 2012, 02:35:14 PM
granted. except now you no longer have place for anything else.

I wish I had a smaller waist and less love for beer and rum.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 16, 2012, 05:26:36 PM
Quote from: Vibes6 on August 16, 2012, 02:35:14 PM
I wish I had a smaller waist and less love for beer and rum.
Granted. You're now five inches tall, and will only drink champagne whose bottles cost more than a car.

I wish I stopped losing things.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sara Thomas on August 16, 2012, 08:15:27 PM
Granted - Everything that you have ever lost is being mailed back to you... C.O.D.

I wish it weren't so dang hot and dry here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Elsa on August 16, 2012, 10:03:49 PM
Granted - but now it either rains or snows all the time and is very cold.

I wish I had more time to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 17, 2012, 05:59:33 AM
Quote from: Vibes6 on August 16, 2012, 10:03:49 PM
I wish I had more time to sleep.

Granted. You are now ineducable and unemployable.

I want a body that stays thin and toned no matter how much I eat or how little exercise I do.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 17, 2012, 11:06:06 AM
Quote from: agfrommd on August 16, 2012, 11:35:24 AM
Granted. Your 11,238th and 11,239th wishes will not be corrupted.

Curses! Well played, afgrommd, well played.

Quote from: agfrommd on August 17, 2012, 05:59:33 AM
I want a body that stays thin and toned no matter how much I eat or how little exercise I do.

Granted. The thinness is so severe you blow over in a stiff wind, and the tone is that of angry hornets.

I wish my knees worked better.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sara Thomas on August 17, 2012, 11:44:24 AM
Quote from: Your Humble Savant on August 17, 2012, 11:06:06 AM
I wish my knees worked better.

Granted - Now they are demanding a raise, and your elbows are complaining of inequality.

I wish the cat would leave me alone when I'm internetting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Elsa on August 17, 2012, 01:03:52 PM
Granted But now a dog wont stop looking at you with its cute little eyes for attention while your internetting.

I wish I can study more/learn better/faster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 17, 2012, 02:02:55 PM
Quote from: Vibes6 on August 17, 2012, 01:03:52 PM
I wish I can study more/learn better/faster.
Wish granted. You are now a computer. Unfortunately you have to pause every minute or two to upgrade some of your software.

I wish I was able to fix anything.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 22, 2012, 03:23:15 PM
Granted. You can fix anything, but it only stays fixed for twenty seconds.

I wish my school stuff would pack itself neatly and ship itself off to campus.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 22, 2012, 05:36:34 PM
Quote from: DianaP on August 22, 2012, 05:05:45 PM
I wish to be able to have a boyfriend.

Diana, get the door. Your blind date's here. Says his name is Rush Limbaugh.

I wish I were immune to all disease.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 22, 2012, 06:09:38 PM
Granted but you have to spend your entire life savings to gain immunity so you are now broke.

I wish I had real diamonds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 22, 2012, 08:31:13 PM
Quote from: DianaP on August 22, 2012, 06:43:29 PM
I wish I knew Russian, French, and Chinese.

Granted. You now can say "you drool in your sleep" in three languages.

I wish I never dropped anything.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dante on August 23, 2012, 12:45:47 AM
Granted. The person who gives you the cinnamon pretzel puts salt on it also.

I wish I could stop listening to this song over and over!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 23, 2012, 06:40:07 AM
Quote from: Dante on August 23, 2012, 12:45:47 AM
I wish I could stop listening to this song over and over!
You are now too hearing impaired to hear the music. Now you have to watch someone sign it over and over.

I wish I could live in a place that's a ten minute walk to a secluded river bank where I could sit and reflect and a ten minute walk in the other direction to a main street where I could buy whatever I needed without getting into a car.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 27, 2012, 10:06:13 PM
Granted. It's a ten-minute walk through boiling oatmeal, the river is always full of rotten mushrooms, the other way is a normal walk but main street only exists on Tuesday for ten minutes.

I wish I had no financial woes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 28, 2012, 05:12:18 AM
Quote from: DianaP on August 27, 2012, 10:13:08 PM
i wish for a custom cross bicycle.
It's coming. Oh, you wanted pedals? Well that'll be a few hundred extra.

I wish my relatives weren't quite so crazy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 28, 2012, 02:14:15 PM
Quote from: DianaP on August 27, 2012, 10:13:08 PM
Granted. You now own a corporation, but are too busy to even listen to music!

Ohh, very clever. Cut out my heart, why don't ya  :P

Quote from: DianaP on August 28, 2012, 09:06:09 AM
I wish for a Sonic the Hedgehog plush toy.

Granted. It comes alive at night and eats your face.

I wish global warming would stop  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 28, 2012, 06:07:06 PM
Quote from: DianaP on August 28, 2012, 02:24:17 PM
I wish to just wake up tomorrow as a girl.

Jeez, Diana, we all wish that. How are we supposed to corrupt that? Oh, well, you asked for it.

Granted but you have this strange feeling. You're body isn't quite right. Could it be you're FtM genderqueer? Thinking about top surgery?...

I wish I were always witty and interesting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Your Humble Savant on August 29, 2012, 04:12:49 PM
Granted. They're made of cheap plastic and about three inches long.

I wish eating healthy was easier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 29, 2012, 04:47:32 PM
Quote from: DianaP on August 29, 2012, 04:22:46 PM
I wish I could feel my left hand again.

Granted. *Chop*. It's right there in your freezer. You may open the door and feel it whenever you want.

I wish for no more hurricanes this year.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 18, 2013, 07:47:06 PM
Granted, unfortunately there was no room for them. The weather cycles were too full of Tsunami's, typhoons, heat waves, cold snaps, earth quakes, comet showers, catastrophic multi storm cells, volcanoes and the odd day of good weather.

I Wish I was a brilliant opera singer
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Joe. on January 18, 2013, 08:04:58 PM
Granted. But you get a really bad throat and can never sing again.

I wish I could have a dog.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 18, 2013, 08:30:09 PM
Granted. Regrettably your Vet didn't check it for rabies.It bit you and you died instantaneously . 

I Wish I was a famous ballet dancer
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on January 19, 2013, 07:10:41 AM
Quote from: Joey4 on January 18, 2013, 08:04:58 PM
Granted. But you get a really bad throat and can never sing again.

I wish I could have a dog.

Granted. Enjoy the 900th trip to the pet store in search of a flea powder that actually works.

I wish the people I live with wouldn't leave their things lying around everywhere.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 19, 2013, 08:07:33 AM
Wish granted-Someone robs them of everything they have including your things.

I wish I was a dead worm.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 19, 2013, 07:48:25 PM
Granted. Fortunately for you an anthropology student saw your diminished state and took you on, resuscitated you and you went on to become a most beautiful butterfly.

I wish I was a honey bee
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on January 19, 2013, 07:52:45 PM
You are, and we know we can count on you for something sweet.

I wish gardening season were here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on January 19, 2013, 07:54:58 PM
Granted but all you can grow is dandelions

I wish we would get some snow
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Shawn Sunshine on January 19, 2013, 08:03:36 PM
Granted - But its yellow snow falling down.

I wish I could find my true love.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on January 19, 2013, 08:08:07 PM
Quote from: Shawn Sunshine on January 19, 2013, 08:03:36 PM
I wish I could find my true love.

Granted. His name is Bruno and he has a religious objection to showering.

I wish I had perfect vision.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 19, 2013, 08:16:44 PM
Granted. Unfortunately, due to global warming and the rise of gasses into the atmosphere, they blocked out the sun and so there was nothing to see.

I wish I could eliminate world poverty
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 19, 2013, 09:21:28 PM
Granted- you eliminate poverty but you're left with an empty feeling afterwards thinking you could have done more

I wish I was goat fur.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 19, 2013, 10:02:59 PM
Granted. Your fleece was of such fine quality, you were shawn of it and made into a nice angora sweater for s very posh lady, who insisted in using a foul smelling perfume,which made you sneeze.

I Wish I was a little fleck of fairy dust.




P.S. Congratulations on handling the poverty one with such grace and dignity. You're a man after my own heart. :icon_heart:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on January 20, 2013, 06:53:33 AM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on January 19, 2013, 10:02:59 PM
I Wish I was a little fleck of fairy dust.

Can't resist this one. Sorry if it offends anyone.

Granted, but your parents disowned you because they wanted a fleck of manly heterosexual dust that would produce grandchildren.

I wish I weren't so sensitive to cold.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on January 20, 2013, 07:05:26 AM
Granted but your job requires you to live in Nome,Alaska

I wish I was living in a cottage by a babbling brook
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 20, 2013, 08:42:52 AM
Granted. However due to unseasonal snow conditions, in spring they melted rapidly, turning your gossiping babbling brook into a raging torrents, sweeping you and your cottage away into the depths of the Pacific Ocean, where you were seen by over flying aircraft bobbing up and down on the waves on your own little cottage island.

I Wish I could have transitioned 30 years ago.


@agfrommd No offence intended, none taken. I thought it was pretty funny - because that did come true. They got their grandchildren. :laugh:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on January 20, 2013, 02:07:39 PM
Granted. Now you're mad for not wishing for a sooner transition date! ;D

I wish I could talk in other accents. >.<
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on January 20, 2013, 03:32:52 PM
Granted but it is in Latin

I wish get all my work caught up
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on January 20, 2013, 09:32:20 PM
Granted but your work was done incorrectly so it has to be done all over again.

I wish I was a ant's leg that fell off.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sara Thomas on March 03, 2013, 03:08:58 PM
Granted - A passing Roly-Poly picked you up and used you to club an Ant-Lion to death.

I'm doing my own: I wish it would warm up some.

Granted - It's 77 degrees Fahrenheit, with wind gusts up to 30mph (thereby, with the windchill, making it feel like -342 degrees out...).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on March 04, 2013, 04:47:14 AM
Granted but it warms up too much to 115 and the air con is broken, nasty.

I wish I others could be happy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on March 04, 2013, 04:55:23 AM
Granted...

But now everyone constantly laughs with maniacal laughter

I wish I didn't have to go to bed
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 04, 2013, 06:10:35 AM
Granted. And you see life from a different perspective, rushing off to live life to the fullest.
Regrettable on your way to enjoy life to the max, sleep deprivation takes hold and you become zombified for time immemorial.

I would like to lose a billion dollars
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on March 04, 2013, 06:21:44 AM
Granted, easy come easy go but it wasn't yours to loose and the Mob (Cindy) are coming around for a visit..

I wish I had better depth perception.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 04, 2013, 06:45:11 AM
Quote from: Jenny07 on March 04, 2013, 06:21:44 AM
Granted, easy come easy go but it wasn't yours to loose and the Mob (Cindy) are coming around for a visit..

Thanks Jenny. <*Catherine quickly running round the home, drawing the blinds, locking doors, turning lights off, phone off the hook.*>  Damn!!! Not that SA woman again. I'll never hear her coming in her socks and heels.   :laugh:   :laugh:

Quote from: Jenny07 on March 04, 2013, 06:21:44 AM
I wish I had better depth perception.

Granted.  Unfortunately this wish took some time to implement, for unknown reasons. In the meantime you went deep sea diving down the Mariana Trench where you then realised the depth was far too great from your diving suit to bear. You were immediately crushed to death.

I wish I could eliminate world wide poverty
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on March 04, 2013, 07:08:54 AM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 04, 2013, 06:45:11 AM
I wish I could eliminate world wide poverty

Granted. You just landed the world's worse case of carpal tunnel syndrome from writing a check to every single poor person on the planet.

I hope the snowstorm predicted for tomorrow night misses us.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jeepgirl90 on March 04, 2013, 11:37:51 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on March 04, 2013, 07:08:54 AM
I hope the snowstorm predicted for tomorrow night misses us.

GRANTED: However now there will be lots of rain, so much that your whole town floods.


I wish I could win a nice lump sum of money
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on March 04, 2013, 05:45:03 PM
Granted! A giant bar of gold falls out of the sky and crushes you. :3

I wish people would worry about their own hair instead of nagging me to cut mine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kevin Peña on March 04, 2013, 06:45:41 PM
Granted, but everyone becomes consumed by their hair and no longer wish or have the time to hang out with you.  :P

I wish for a unicorn like Princess Amethyst's.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Ffc09.deviantart.net%2Ffs71%2Ff%2F2012%2F227%2F1%2F8%2Fprincess_amethyst_by_sii_sen-d5b5civ.png&hash=b5e865b5f53b28455d5f237006bff2e1bfb61d79)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jeepgirl90 on March 04, 2013, 07:20:30 PM
Granted but shortly after you receive it it accidentally kills you with it's horn

I wish I could afford a new house in a nice quiet area
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 05, 2013, 05:57:34 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on March 04, 2013, 07:08:54 AM
Granted. You just landed the world's worse case of carpal tunnel syndrome from writing a check to every single poor person on the planet.

Thank you Suzi,

That was a hard one and you dealt with it just so tactfully.

Quote from: Jeepgirl90 on March 04, 2013, 07:20:30 PM
I wish I could afford a new house in a nice quiet area

Granted. However due to a really massive population blow out in human history, the only place we could accommodate you was slap bang on the South Pole, where the chill factor was so intense, you froze to death.

I wish I could stop laughing and crying at the same time
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: kariann330 on March 09, 2013, 06:24:45 AM
Wish granted, but instead of laughing and crying you are now coughing and sneezing at the same time.

I wish i wasn't bipolar anymore
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on March 10, 2013, 07:45:43 AM
Quote from: kariann330 on March 09, 2013, 06:24:45 AM
I wish i wasn't bipolar anymore

Granted. You're now 100% well adjusted and always in a generally pleasant mood. Now you can't stand to be around any of us, don't understand why we all need to take mood meds, can't see why we don't just snap out of it.

I wish my transition didn't make so many people so unhappy.
Title: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keira on March 10, 2013, 11:08:58 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on March 10, 2013, 07:45:43 AM
I wish my transition didn't make so many people so unhappy.

Granted

Except two years later a chemical spill results in 80% of the world becoming permanently negative/depressed.

I wish I had a condition that made my T level lower and my E level higher.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jeepgirl90 on March 11, 2013, 12:16:14 PM
Wish granted but due to your new condition you are now an African Tree Frog


I wish I didn't have to go to work on my day off
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on March 11, 2013, 01:00:01 PM
Quote from: Jeepgirl90 on March 11, 2013, 12:16:14 PM
I wish I didn't have to go to work on my day off

Too easy: You are now laid off.

I wish my the administrators here appreciated the job I do and thought my program was too important for cutbacks.
Title: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keira on March 11, 2013, 01:19:20 PM
Quote from: suzifrommd on March 11, 2013, 01:00:01 PM
I wish my the administrators here appreciated the job I do and thought my program was too important for cutbacks.

Congratulations, your program goes through...unfortunately the administrators manipulate your program to their own ends and leave you with all the blame.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 10, 2013, 05:30:10 AM
I wish I was born completely satisfied with my body and with superhuman strength and intelligence.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 10, 2013, 06:28:55 AM
Quote from: LocustBlotter on May 10, 2013, 05:30:10 AM
I wish I was born completely satisfied with my body and with superhuman strength and intelligence.

Granted... But you live on an alien planet where even the strongest and most intelligent of humans are considered a bunch of weak snivelers

I wish I lived somewhere that my sleep habits were on par with normal daily life
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on May 10, 2013, 08:25:15 AM
granted, however due to normal being sleeping 12 hours a day and eating for 10 hours, you grow sluggish and blimply.

I wish  for 'No More Insults' to be an honest politician's winning slogan.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 09:14:39 AM
Quote from: LordKAT on May 10, 2013, 08:25:15 AM
granted, however due to normal being sleeping 12 hours a day and eating for 10 hours, you grow sluggish and blimply.

I wish  for 'No More Insults' to be an honest politician's winning slogan.
Granted. But he's an honest neo-nazi.

I wish that the defense for the Brothers Castro (from the Cleveland case) would, in trial, request the harshest possible sentence for their clients. 'Cause I like to think that even lawyers have moral limits on what they'll defend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on May 10, 2013, 09:16:43 AM
Granted. Unfortuantely due to a long and ruthless search, worldwide, no honest politicans could be found to hang that shingle on.

I wish there were more dark chocolate coated jelly beans in the world
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 10:48:54 AM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on May 10, 2013, 09:16:43 AM
I wish there were more dark chocolate coated jelly beans in the world

Granted. Go out and enjoy them. What is that you say? Can't get your door open? There's a large dark mound of WHAT blocking the way?

I wish my divorce would just go smoothly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 11:01:22 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 10:48:54 AM
Granted. Go out and enjoy them. What is that you say? Can't get your door open? There's a large dark mound of WHAT blocking the way?

I wish my divorce would just go smoothly.
Granted. Your ex gets everything, plus alimony.

I wish standing desks didn't make my feet hurt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 10, 2013, 11:06:46 AM
Quote from: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 11:01:22 AM
Granted. Your ex gets everything, plus alimony.

I wish standing desks didn't make my feet hurt.

Granted,  but your boss is still a pain in the butt!

I wish I had a popsicle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 11:12:49 AM
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 10, 2013, 11:06:46 AM
Granted,  but your boss is still a pain in the butt!

I wish I had a popsicle.
Granted. You had a Popsicle - when you were ten.

I wish I had a jelly bean.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 10, 2013, 11:20:01 AM
Granted, one thousand, four hundred, seventy eight times! 



I wish I had made it one thousand, three hundred, seventy eight jelly beans.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 03:03:03 PM
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 10, 2013, 11:20:01 AM
I wish I had made it one thousand, three hundred, seventy eight jelly beans.

Granted. You may go back in time and change your wish. Just let me set the time machine. Hmm. Uh... Don't know how to tell you this, but I accidentally set it a mite too far. You're now two and a half.

I wish people would stop wishing for jelly beans.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 03:06:14 PM
Quote from: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 03:03:03 PM
Granted. You may go back in time and change your wish. Just let me set the time machine. Hmm. Uh... Don't know how to tell you this, but I accidentally set it a mite too far. You're now two and a half.

I wish people would stop wishing for jelly beans.
Granted.

I wish I had a jammy dodger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 10, 2013, 03:12:17 PM
Granted, but unfortunately a dog got into your package and ate them all.  :(

I wish the world would always smell like freshly ground coffee beans.  :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 10, 2013, 04:46:32 PM
Granted... But it's uncleaned Kopi Luwak (google it)
I wish I hadn't eaten all the sugar that I did yesterday.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 10, 2013, 05:12:15 PM
Quote from: LocustBlotter on May 10, 2013, 04:46:32 PM
Granted... But it's uncleaned Kopi Luwak (google it)
I wish I hadn't eaten all the sugar that I did yesterday.



Granted, but you had three bags of potato chips and your blood pressure is sky high. And you're thirsty.


I wish I had a new couch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on May 10, 2013, 05:16:17 PM
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 10, 2013, 05:12:15 PM


Granted, but you had three bags of potato chips and your blood pressure is sky high. And you're thirsty.


I wish I had a new couch.
Granted. It's new... to you.

I wish nobody at Goodwill would stare at me today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 10, 2013, 05:25:00 PM
Granted... But instead of staring at you, they poke at you and grab at you.
I wish I had a more angular face.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 07:58:18 PM
Quote from: LocustBlotter on May 10, 2013, 05:25:00 PM
Granted... But instead of staring at you, they poke at you and grab at you.
I wish I had a more angular face.

Granted:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ethanrogge.com%2Fimages%2Ftriangle%2520face.jpg&hash=b6777ffb84d38144b75a7f421737543bfdeab030)

I wish computers always did what you wanted.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 10, 2013, 08:31:02 PM
Quote from: suzifrommd on May 10, 2013, 07:58:18 PM
Granted:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.ethanrogge.com%2Fimages%2Ftriangle%2520face.jpg&hash=b6777ffb84d38144b75a7f421737543bfdeab030)
Haha your answer made me laugh.
Granted... But it takes the computer four months to do everything (like open a browser or move the mouse.)
I wish my pet rats would live longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 10, 2013, 08:47:40 PM
Granted... But they have taken up residence in your hair

I wish I had a transporter device to go to the grocery store and back to do my shopping rather than having to ride my bicycle
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 10, 2013, 08:54:09 PM
Granted... But you get really obese from lack of physical activity.
I wish I could eat whatever I wanted and still be muscular, thin, and healthy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 11, 2013, 05:37:29 AM
Granted, but the stores only carry strawberry flavored Ensure now.

I wish it wasn't raining.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 11, 2013, 05:43:20 AM
Granted... But it's 153 degrees fahrenheit and sunny. There is also no air conditioner.
I wish my grandfather wasn't such a sadistic, bigoted arse.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 11, 2013, 06:01:22 AM
Granted, but now he's aTellitubby.

I wish I could take my dog to school with me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 11, 2013, 06:32:20 AM
Granted... But some kid decides to throw things at your dog and aggravate it, your dog bites the kid in self defense, the kid's parents press charges, and your dog has to be put to sleep.
I wish my cat wasn't so picky about his food.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2013, 09:39:30 PM
Granted.  Your cat now uses your bed as a place to go to the bathroom instead.



I wish sodas were healthy to drink.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on May 14, 2013, 10:09:01 PM
Granted. You however become sooooo healthy with your 'Hulk" type figure, the rest of the world embraces soda as a national beverage.

This leads to a massive worldwide shortage of water (used in manufacture) that eventually leads to mankind's demise on this planet.

The moral of this story is: not everything that's healthy for you, is good for you.

I wish summer was eternal
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Liminal Stranger on May 14, 2013, 10:14:08 PM
Granted, but you don't have an A/C.

I wish my puppy would stop being so overprotective and paranoid, she thinks every noise is an intruder coming to steal her toys and bones.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 14, 2013, 10:46:50 PM
Granted.  Your puppy runs away.


I wish I could eat a tire without any negative consequences.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on May 14, 2013, 11:58:01 PM
Granted.  The diet of car tyres was soooooo successful, you actually morphed into one. And such was the transformation, you were picked to be a tyre on a Formula 1 racing car that won the world grand prix. (without blow outs or wear - well you did ask for no negative consequences didn't you?) :laugh:

I wish "Oscar the Grouch's" fairy godmother waved her wand over him and he became eternally happy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 15, 2013, 01:04:35 PM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on May 14, 2013, 11:58:01 PM
I wish "Oscar the Grouch's" fairy godmother waved her wand over him and he became eternally happy.

Poor Oscar. He's now out of a job. And this showed up on Craigslist:

"To Let: One efficiency trash can. Due to heating issues having fur definitely helps. Sunny disposition need not apply. Send application to 6 Sesame Street."

I wish the temperature where I work were always comfortable.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Liminal Stranger on May 15, 2013, 04:49:53 PM
Granted, but you're sent on a permanent business trip to Siberia.
I wish people would quit calling me a girl.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 06:54:46 PM
Quote from: Liminal Stranger on May 15, 2013, 04:49:53 PM
Granted, but you're sent on a permanent business trip to Siberia.
I wish people would quit calling me a girl.

Granted but now they call you Petunia.

I wish my "female dog" boss would go on vacation permanently, and I'd only have to work with the nice attorneys who give me fun projects.  :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 15, 2013, 06:59:27 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on May 15, 2013, 06:54:46 PM
Granted but now they call you Petunia.

I wish my "female dog" boss would go on vacation permanently, and I'd only have to work with the nice attorneys who give me fun projects.  :D

Granted! But now all of your "fun" work revolves around clowns, you have a crippling clown phobia and your ex-boss is now your sister-in-law.

I wish that people could only see me how I feel about myself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 07:03:26 PM
Quote from: cynths on May 15, 2013, 06:59:27 PM
Granted! But now all of your "fun" work revolves around clowns, you have a crippling clown phobia and your ex-boss is now your sister-in-law.

I wish that people could only see me how I feel about myself.

Granted, but now you have a disorder where you can only see yourself as a giant talking stick of asparagus.

I wish I was the Terminator.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2013, 07:21:40 PM
Granted but you are only a prototype that got discarded.

I wish I was a flute.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 15, 2013, 07:31:41 PM
Quote from: Malachite on May 15, 2013, 07:21:40 PM
Granted but you are only a prototype that got discarded.

I wish I was a flute.

Granted! You are always off-key and never got to go to band camp.
I wish I had been born a wealthy Lady in Medieval times with none of the VD that was going around.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2013, 07:34:24 PM
Quote from: cynths on May 15, 2013, 07:31:41 PM
Granted! You are always off-key and never got to go to band camp.
I wish I had been born a wealthy Lady in Medieval times with none of the VD that was going around.

Granted. You live a long life and die at age 30. 


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 15, 2013, 07:37:28 PM
Gah! I'd better make the next two and a half years worthwhile!
Make a wish Malachite!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 07:38:38 PM
Malachite wishes he was in heaven surrounded by 7 beautiful virgins.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2013, 07:44:08 PM
OOPS lol

Lets go with LearnedHand's idea.  I wish for heaven surrounded by 7 beautiful virgins!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 07:47:07 PM
Granted, except they're 7 beautiful virgin aligators! Look out!  :o

I wish my jaw didn't keep popping.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2013, 08:02:32 PM
Granted.  Now you have lockjaw.  No more jaw popping for you!


I wish I had a pet worm.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 08:15:35 PM
Granted, except its one of these scary worms: http://www.cracked.com/article_19988_the-5-most-nightmarish-worms-planet.html (http://www.cracked.com/article_19988_the-5-most-nightmarish-worms-planet.html)

I wish I had a vacation.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 15, 2013, 08:35:19 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on May 15, 2013, 08:15:35 PM
Granted, except its one of these scary worms: http://www.cracked.com/article_19988_the-5-most-nightmarish-worms-planet.html (http://www.cracked.com/article_19988_the-5-most-nightmarish-worms-planet.html)

I wish I had a vacation.

Granted, you're on a cruise ship doubled over in the bathroom with cruiseshipahrea.


I wish my stereo went to 11.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 15, 2013, 08:41:56 PM
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on May 15, 2013, 08:35:19 PM
Granted, you're on a cruise ship doubled over in the bathroom with cruiseshipahrea.


I wish my stereo went to 11.

Granted! Your profound hearing loss is only just negated by your fab new stereo! Also, your neighbours now hate you.
I wish I didn't live next to Devlyns' house with her new stereo.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 15, 2013, 08:44:24 PM
Granted, you live next to my family which illegally burns trash (including plastic)!

I wish my eyes didn't water when I am sleepy, it makes it really hard to see. G'nite guys, typing blind!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 15, 2013, 08:59:53 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on May 15, 2013, 08:44:24 PM
Granted, you live next to my family which illegally burns trash (including plastic)!

I wish my eyes didn't water when I am sleepy, it makes it really hard to see. G'nite guys, typing blind!

Granted! Your eyes become so dry that you need to use eyedrops to keep them moist during the day, but you do get a good night sleep :)

I wish for world peace.
Who's going to ruin that for everyone huh?!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 15, 2013, 09:08:55 PM
Granted, there is peace. Your stockbroker invested every dime you had in Raytheon yesterday.



I wish I had some ice cream.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 15, 2013, 09:24:02 PM
Granted, but then you drop it on the ground and step on it

I wish the world wasn't full of people who think they need to step on everyone and everything
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 15, 2013, 09:29:34 PM
Granted, it only seems like it's filled with them sometimes.




I wish you'd come with me to the ice cream place for more.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 15, 2013, 11:06:38 PM
Granted but the ice cream place has ran out of ice cream.

I wish I had a necklace made out of cheese.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on May 16, 2013, 12:41:50 AM
Granted.  Unfortunately while dinning at the most expensive restaurant in town, you are besieged  by a plague of mice who eat your necklace and the restaurant refuses to compensate you. You leave both hungry and without your "jewellery"

I wish I had an endless Hershey's chocolate malted.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2013, 01:00:15 AM
Granted but it's only a picture in a magazine.

I wish someone would tell me a bed time story with a confusing ending.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 16, 2013, 06:31:37 AM
Granted, but it's so confusing that you can't fall asleep because you're thinking about it too much.

I wish someone would make me breakfast.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: xander on May 16, 2013, 07:02:39 AM
Granted. But breakfast is frogs legs and pig snouts.

I wish that I could gain knowledge from books simply by touching them.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 16, 2013, 10:34:26 AM
Quote from: xander on May 16, 2013, 07:02:39 AM
I wish that I could gain knowledge from books simply by touching them.

Granted. Unfortunately you accidentally picked up the book called "The physician's guide to human bodily fluids" and your appetite is totally gone.

I wish we could try on other bodies to see how they feel.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on May 16, 2013, 10:41:25 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on May 16, 2013, 10:34:26 AM
Granted. Unfortunately you accidentally picked up the book called "The physician's guide to human bodily fluids" and your appetite is totally gone.

I wish we could try on other bodies to see how they feel.

Granted. while you were in Bodies-R-Us someone backed into your car.



I wish my dog would learn to cook and have dinner ready when I got home.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on May 16, 2013, 03:29:49 PM
Granted, but the pig cooks cleans and decides to get it's own apartment. It also sues you for back pay.

I wish I had more money and less work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2013, 04:26:47 PM
Granted.  However money is now useless and we all barter with rocks instead.

I wish there was a snake in my toilet.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 16, 2013, 08:27:40 PM
Granted, but it's a poisonous snake and it bites your butt when you sit down.

I wish I was a hobbit and lived in the shire all happy!  :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 16, 2013, 09:34:04 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on May 16, 2013, 08:27:40 PM
Granted, but it's a poisonous snake and it bites your butt when you sit down.

I wish I was a hobbit and lived in the shire all happy!  :D

Saruman has invaded and enslaved your people! Damn that sucks!

I wish my laundry was all done...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 16, 2013, 10:46:05 PM
Granted but now the machine is broken.

I wish  I was an abused bucket.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 17, 2013, 06:15:18 AM
Granted, but because you've been cracked during the abuse, you've been thrown in the garbage.

I wish I didn't drop my omelette on the floor.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2013, 06:24:09 AM
Granted-  You drop it in the toilet instead. 

I wish I didn't feel so lonely.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 17, 2013, 07:19:11 AM
Quote from: Malachite on May 17, 2013, 06:24:09 AM
Granted-  You drop it in the toilet instead. 

I wish I didn't feel so lonely.

Granted! You've been convicted of bucket abuse and are in prison. You have no time alone, nor a private moment until you get bail!

I wish Joffrey would die in Game of Thrones!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2013, 07:20:33 AM
Yay!  That big burley guy over there looks interesting.


Granted.  Joffrey dies, but everyone around you is  crying so loud about it that it annoys you.

I wish I had a pet tapeworm in the bathroom sink
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on May 17, 2013, 08:53:35 AM
Granted, but a worm loving activist group has them put on a endangered list and raid your house to turn it loose in the wild.


I wish sleep would happen when I need it and not when it is time for work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 17, 2013, 05:24:30 PM
Granted... You get lots of sleep every night before work, but you have terrible, hyper-realistic nightmares the whole time. Also, because you are sleeping so well, you can't wake up from the nightmares.
I wish I looked like Jim Morrison. BEFORE he got fat ad grew a beard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 17, 2013, 06:48:46 PM
Granted... You get into a horrible accident and after reconstructive surgery you look just like Jim Morrison if he had been in a horrible accident

I wish all the various scars all over my body would all disappear
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 17, 2013, 06:59:38 PM
Quote from: V M on May 17, 2013, 06:48:46 PM
I wish all the various scars all over my body would all disappear

Granted. They're gone. You look funny with all those places where you have no skin and we can see all your blood vessels and muscle tissue underneath.

I wish transphobic bathroom Nazis the world wide would just mind their own business.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 17, 2013, 07:10:10 PM
Granted... But all of the transphobic nazi's turn into cannibalistic demons that shoot acid out of their eyes.
I wish The Doors would have made more songs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2013, 09:53:59 PM
Granted but all of the extra songs suck.

I wish I wasn't so itchy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 17, 2013, 10:10:44 PM
Granted... But to stop the itchiness, all your skin gets melted off with hydrochloric acid.
I wish I could have a tea party with Albert Einstein, Andy Warhol, Syd Barrett, and Douglas Adams.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2013, 10:27:35 PM
Granted but the tea is posioned and you all die.

I wish I was taller.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 17, 2013, 10:55:25 PM
Granted... You end up growing to thirteen feet tall and you can't walk through any doorways.
I wish I was sexier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 17, 2013, 11:03:36 PM
Granted, but now everyone (including yourself) is blind so it doesn't matter

I wish I had a whistle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 17, 2013, 11:53:42 PM
Granted... But the whistle is coated with sulphuric acid and your lips melt off.
I wish I had a bigger fanbase on the pages I admin.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2013, 12:57:40 AM
Granted, but the website shuts down the day after so it doesn't matter.

I wish I didn't have to use the bathroom.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 18, 2013, 01:14:54 AM
Granted... You are no longer able to eat or drink.
I wish I was more secure and happy with my body.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2013, 01:22:36 AM
Granted but you wake up and realize it was all a dream

I wish I didn't get anymore headaches
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 18, 2013, 02:15:20 AM
Granted... You are decapitated by a serial killer.
I wish I was a Time Lord.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2013, 02:31:42 AM
Granted but your parents forbid you to use your time lord powers or you're grounded


I wish I had a tooth pick
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 18, 2013, 02:50:38 AM
Granted... But it can only be seen under a microscope and is no use whatsoever.
I wish I had a Bulgarian donkey with a knack for quantum physics and knitting. I would name it Alwert and it would speak French.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2013, 02:54:08 AM
Granted, but someone steals that Donkey and barters it for a goat.

I wish I had a bigger tv.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 18, 2013, 03:08:56 AM
Granted... But it can only play Justin Beiber music videos.
I wish my rat wouldn't poop everywhere.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 18, 2013, 03:40:24 AM
Granted... The rat will now only poop in your shoes

I wish I had as much energy as I did when I was young
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on May 18, 2013, 03:50:27 AM
Granted... You go back in time and have to live your life all over again.
I wish my grandfather would croak soon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on May 18, 2013, 04:10:15 AM
Granted... Your Grandfather turns into a toad and since he's your Grandfather you turn into a toad as well and you both sit about croaking at each other all through the night with the rest of your family

I wish I could eat as much of what ever I wanted without getting sick or gaining weight
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 18, 2013, 06:04:19 AM
Granted but all of the food you consume now tastes nasty.

I wish I wasn't addicted to sour candy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 18, 2013, 06:51:55 AM
Quote from: Malachite on May 18, 2013, 06:04:19 AM
Granted but all of the food you consume now tastes nasty.

I wish I wasn't addicted to sour candy.

Granted! The 12 month rehab was well worth it! Your dentist loves you.

I wish I had Mystiques' power from X-men (and no one goes blind!).
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 20, 2013, 11:09:31 PM
Granted but it causes the people around you to go deaf instead.

I wish I had a skateboard.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on May 21, 2013, 04:01:59 AM
Granted! Everybody else gets a hoverboard!

I wish all my things were already packed to move next week.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on May 21, 2013, 07:59:59 AM
Quote from: cynths on May 21, 2013, 04:01:59 AM
I wish all my things were already packed to move next week.

Packed. Moved. Shipped. You wanted them sent to northern Siberia, right?

I wish I were calmer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on May 21, 2013, 03:58:36 PM
Granted, but now people walk all over you.
I wish I could type faster and more accurately.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on May 21, 2013, 04:49:18 PM
Granted but your computer  automatically dies each time before you have a chance to save.

I wish I had more grapes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on June 04, 2013, 04:26:24 PM
Quote from: Malachite on May 21, 2013, 04:49:18 PM
Granted but your computer  automatically dies each time before you have a chance to save.

I wish I had more grapes.

They're all covered with mold.

I wish i had someone to finish all of my school projects.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Liminal Stranger on June 04, 2013, 07:22:06 PM
Quote from: CalmRage on June 04, 2013, 04:26:24 PM
They're all covered with mold.

I wish i had someone to finish all of my school projects.
Granted, my seven year old cousin was happy to help. Look, there's even a handprint on it! Can't say much about the content, though...

I wish my mother understood that there is no such thing as "a seedy underground community of freaks where the men dress up like women and the women go around saying that they're men".
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on June 05, 2013, 08:03:27 AM
Quote from: Liminal Stranger on June 04, 2013, 07:22:06 PM
I wish my mother understood that there is no such thing as "a seedy underground community of freaks where the men dress up like women and the women go around saying that they're men".

Granted. A high-class out-in-the open community moves into your area of men who dress up like women and women who go around saying that they're men. They're so high-class that the property values soar and you can no longer afford to live there and have to move.

I wish workplace discrimination against trans people would stop.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on June 05, 2013, 10:19:26 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on June 05, 2013, 08:03:27 AM
Granted. A high-class out-in-the open community moves into your area of men who dress up like women and women who go around saying that they're men. They're so high-class that the property values soar and you can no longer afford to live there and have to move.

I wish workplace discrimination against trans people would stop.

Your wish is granted. However, as soon as you leave work, a group of Westboro Baptist fanatics attack you.

I wish my mood swings would disappear.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Liminal Stranger on June 05, 2013, 11:24:47 PM
Quote from: CalmRage on June 05, 2013, 10:19:26 AM
Your wish is granted. However, as soon as you leave work, a group of Westboro Baptist fanatics attack you.

I wish my mood swings would disappear.
Granted. You now have a mood merry-go-round.

I wish I didn't have to get up so early tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rachel85 on June 06, 2013, 12:54:05 AM
Quote from: Liminal Stranger on June 05, 2013, 11:24:47 PM
Granted. You now have a mood merry-go-round.

I wish I didn't have to get up so early tomorrow.

Granted! Tomorrow never comes! It is the Mayan apocalypse which we all had wrong by a few months!

I wish I had more privacy where I live.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on June 06, 2013, 10:44:13 AM
Quote from: cynths on June 06, 2013, 12:54:05 AM
Granted! Tomorrow never comes! It is the Mayan apocalypse which we all had wrong by a few months!

I wish I had more privacy where I live.

You're the only human in the block and wolves are after you.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: wrabbit on August 04, 2013, 03:37:20 PM
lemme revive this thread.... the previous poster didn't have a wish!

I wish I could drive to my friend's house right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on August 04, 2013, 03:43:42 PM
Quote from: wrabbit on August 04, 2013, 03:37:20 PM
lemme revive this thread.... the previous poster didn't have a wish!

I wish I could drive to my friend's house right now

Wish granted but you must drive a forklift.

I wish I could make you happy............
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 04, 2013, 03:50:34 PM
(Lets try this game)

Your wish is granted. You are making someone happy, but you don't know who....

I wish my belly talked to me...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 04, 2013, 04:03:18 PM
Quote from: TheMultipleOne on August 04, 2013, 03:56:32 PM
Your wish is granted but now your belly won't shut up.

I wish I was a loaf of bread...

Your wish is granted. You are now a loaf of bread, but you were burnt in the oven.

Who removed their post? I was going to quote you as well and fix myself :(

I wish the person that removed their post, felt the wrath of my thunder :P (Just kidding)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 04, 2013, 04:24:32 PM
Maddy reposts her thoughts...

You are a loaf of bread, but gluten-free. Ewww... :P

I wish I could remember my previous wish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 04, 2013, 04:28:05 PM
Quote from: TheMultipleOne on August 04, 2013, 04:21:56 PM
Your wish is granted but they aren't afraid of thunder.

I wish I was an Oscar Mayer wiener.

Granted, but now there's mustard all over you. Yuck.

Quote from: MadeleineG on August 04, 2013, 04:24:32 PM
Maddy reposts her thoughts...

You are a loaf of bread, but gluten-free. Ewww... :P

I wish I could remember my previous wish.

Granted, you now remember you previous post, but you forgot why you posted it.




I keep forgetting to add my wish. I wish i was not so forgetful....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 04, 2013, 08:57:40 PM
Wish granted, but everytime you remember something you normally would've forgotten, someone else is diagnosed with dementia.  :(

I wish I didn't get pimples.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 04, 2013, 09:12:08 PM
Granted. Now you get boils.

I wish my dog were better conversation (as an aside, I wish hadn't deleted this wish earlier)

Maddy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on August 04, 2013, 09:33:32 PM
Granted, your dog learns to speak and becomes a world wide sensation going on tour of all the various talk shows and lands a contract which affords it to get it's own place full of servants to wait on it hand and foot and never calls or visits you again

I wish I could breath normally without having to use inhalers on a daily/nightly basis
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 04, 2013, 09:36:43 PM
Granted, but shortly after you get rid of your inhalers, it's discovered that air pollution has become so horrible that we all must wear gas masks everyday.

I wish I did my laundry today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 04, 2013, 09:51:49 PM
Granted! But the neighbor's dog got into it and now all your clothes are ruined.

I wish everybody would stop being so serious all the time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 05, 2013, 09:30:19 AM
Quote from: Jillian on August 04, 2013, 09:51:49 PM
Granted! But the neighbor's dog got into it and now all your clothes are ruined.

I wish everybody would stop being so serious all the time.

Your wish is granted. Everyone is now mute.

I wish a had a machine that made anything i wanted
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 05, 2013, 09:40:54 AM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 05, 2013, 09:30:19 AM
Your wish is granted. Everyone is now mute.

I wish a had a machine that made anything i wanted

Granted, you just need 1.21 gigawatts of electricity and a flux capacitor to run it

I wish I was healthier without having to work for it
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 01:07:39 PM
Granted. The stock market just crashed.

The wish Canada and the US would sign a Schengen-like open-border agreement. (World's longest undefended waste of time and money)

Maddy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 05, 2013, 01:19:57 PM
Quote from: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 01:07:39 PM
Granted. The stock market just crashed.

The wish Canada and the US would sign a Schengen-like open-border agreement. (World's longest undefended waste of time and money)

Maddy

Wish granted, Americans slowly invade Canada and take over

also lol, what does the stock market have to do with my health.

I wish I had a general idea of where my future is headed
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 01:28:30 PM
"I wish I was healthier without having to work for it"

stock market crashes --> unemployment --> no work

Granted. You're future is headed to Medicine Hat.

I wish western Canada were a bit more liberal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 05, 2013, 01:32:51 PM
lol I meant work out, not job work, I am already unemployed. but anyways....

Wish granted, however, you no longer live in Western Canada, you live in Iraq.

I wish my neck would stop hurting
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 01:39:33 PM
Sorry Casey. Maybe that was a little too oblique.  :-\

How about this one...

Casey: "I wish I was healthier without having to work for it"
Maddy: "Granted. The government has redefined healthy. A BMI of 30 is now considered underweight, chocolate has been added as a food group, and daily sodium intake has been raised to 3000 mg.

I wish western Canada were a bit more liberal.

Maddy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 05, 2013, 01:49:11 PM
Wish granted, however, you no longer live in Western Canada, you live in Iraq.

I wish my neck would stop hurting
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 01:54:44 PM
Granted. Your head now attaches directly to your shoulders.

I wish the HRT fairy would come and leave me a scrip in the middle of the night.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 05, 2013, 02:58:28 PM
Granted but she leaves the wrong one and now you grow scales and a tail.


i wish food would cook itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 05, 2013, 03:29:11 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on August 05, 2013, 02:58:28 PM
Granted but she leaves the wrong one and now you grow scales and a tail.


i wish food would cook itself.

Food can cook itself now, but every time you go to pick food up it vanishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 05, 2013, 03:30:22 PM
oh gosh I wish that too LearnedHand lol.

What about your wish SaveMe?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 05, 2013, 04:03:33 PM
Doh! I am not used to wishing for things :/

I wish i could eat playdough
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 05, 2013, 04:23:28 PM
Wish granted! you can eat playdough, but that doesn't change the fact that it will make you sick. xD

I wish I could do a better backbend.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 04:28:54 PM
Granted. You're an invertebrate.

I wish that everything I wish comes true.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 05, 2013, 04:31:54 PM
Granted! Everything you wish comes true. This in itself could pose a major problem for you. xD

I wish I could shapeshift!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 05, 2013, 06:36:54 PM
Quote from: Makalii on August 05, 2013, 04:31:54 PM
Granted! Everything you wish comes true. This in itself could pose a major problem for you. xD

I wish I could shapeshift!

Granted, only it takes 35 years for each shift to complete, so you are stuck between 2 forms for most of your life

I wish I had no body or facial hair
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 05, 2013, 06:41:05 PM
Granted, but unfortunately scientists were wrong and instead of the earth getting warmer, we suddenly go into an ice age! Now, people need body hair to stay warm and the most famous supermodels are taking hormones to grow large amounts of body hair.

I wish I lived in a country where it's socially acceptable to not shower daily (lol I know, I am disgusting, but don't worry, I am heading for the shower. . .   :D)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 05, 2013, 06:44:57 PM
Granted! You live in a primitive hut village in the rainforest, and you must abide by their taboo codes as you struggle to survive.

I wish I could fall incredible distances without injuring myself!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 06:50:07 PM
Granted. You achieve escape velocity and fly off into space.

I wish every day were a bit longer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 05, 2013, 07:27:37 PM
granted but you find absolutely nothing to do with that extra amount of time

I wish I were alive in the 80's.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 05, 2013, 07:34:37 PM
Granted. Welcome to Andalucia, circa 1484. Do yourself a favour and avoid the Inquisition.

I wish I could read minds.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 05, 2013, 08:02:12 PM
Granted. Good luck making friends now. x)

I wish I could walk through walls.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 06, 2013, 05:43:22 AM
Your wish is granted, Makalii, but when you walk through walls you will be covered in dirt

I wish i had wishes that couldn't be corrupted ;)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanielM on August 06, 2013, 10:35:32 AM
Granted! Everytime you wish for something, even just in a flash of thought it wil be granted, see how long you'll hold out without wishing for something you didn't really want...

I wish I was a merman :p
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 06, 2013, 10:39:55 AM
Granted.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fcdn.fangraphs.com%2Fnot%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2011%2F10%2Freverse_mermaid_rene_magritte-300x192.jpg&hash=457e1ee7ba9647464526e39ee4805ae3dbe5e229)

I wish I had wings.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on August 06, 2013, 11:33:31 AM
Your wish is granted and your wings carry you to such fabulous places that you never return home

I wish my transition was as fun for others as it is for me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 06, 2013, 01:30:17 PM
Your wish is granted, but unfortunately a meteoroid is about to hit Earth.

I wish i knew Wayne Knight
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 06, 2013, 05:57:39 PM
Granted, you are hired as his personal accountant, but he frames you and you become imprisoned for tax evasion and fraud. (and then, you both get eaten by dinosaurs  :( ).

I wish I exercised this morning instead of sleeping in.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: NathanielM on August 06, 2013, 07:01:26 PM
Granted, you excercised but pulled a muscle. Ouch!

I wish I lived in an awesome Tree House
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 06, 2013, 07:12:36 PM
You do... and your forest is about to be clear-cut. :(

I wish they would stop clear-cutting old growth forests.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 06, 2013, 07:21:45 PM
Wish granted, but only because all the fairies turned evil and took over the world, now humans are slaves.  :(

I wish I didn't have to retake the MPRE.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 06, 2013, 07:24:15 PM
Quote from: LearnedHand on August 06, 2013, 07:21:45 PM
Wish granted, but only because all the fairies turned evil and took over the world, now humans are slaves.  :(

I wish I didn't have to retake the MPRE.

Wish granted, you become an evil bloodsucking lawyer ;)

I wish I knew 10 years ago what I know now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 06, 2013, 07:26:22 PM
Granted. You revert to age 17, intellectually.

I wish I felt more awake.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 06, 2013, 09:47:28 PM
Granted! You have thirteen coffees and have acquired insomnia.

I wish I had a tail!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 07, 2013, 05:58:20 AM
Your wish is granted. You now have a tail but it's connected to your chin.

I wish i could download instantly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Liminal Stranger on August 08, 2013, 12:26:53 AM
Granted...but your wifi adapter breaks in every device you own containing one.

I wish I could have a cyborg body that wouldn't fall apart.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 08, 2013, 12:32:56 AM
Wish granted, but your doll no longer wants to live with you.

I wish I could just skip all the in-between stuff and just become who I am inside already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 08, 2013, 04:11:21 AM
Your wish is granted, but unfortunately you are now 54  :P

I wish i could live forever
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 08, 2013, 04:15:20 AM
Wish granted but you still age. Ever wonder what a 900 year old man looks like?

I wish my wishes would stop being corrupted
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 08, 2013, 04:52:40 AM
Your wish is granted, but you no longer have any wishes left now  :P

I wish i could travel at the speed of light
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: wrabbit on August 08, 2013, 05:44:01 AM
you travel at the speed of light!!! and crash horribly :(

I wish I didn't have to go to work tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 08, 2013, 05:48:30 AM
Your wish is granted. You don't have to go to work tomorrow but you will need to make up the time.

I wish my Mum a Happy Birthday
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 08, 2013, 07:05:04 AM
Granted. You will be mute for the next twelve months!

I wish that domestic air travel weren't such a hassle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 08, 2013, 12:44:05 PM
Wish granted, but your next plane will crash horribly.

I wish i could sing like Ian Gillan did in the 70s
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on August 08, 2013, 11:22:14 PM
Wish granted, but your face now resembles a diseased pancreas and you will die within the next five years.
I wish I could be the next doctor.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 06:47:13 AM
Your wish is granted. You are now the next Doctor to appear in Casualty (It's a medical drama).

I wish i never clicked on LocustsBlotters tumblr  :-X
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 09, 2013, 08:57:02 AM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 06:47:13 AM
Your wish is granted. You are now the next Doctor to appear in Casualty (It's a medical drama).

I wish i never clicked on LocustsBlotters tumblr  :-X

Granted. You have no fingers.

I wish I didn't have to move.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: mikaelmackison on August 09, 2013, 09:56:20 AM
Quote from: suzifrommd on August 09, 2013, 08:57:02 AM

I wish I didn't have to move.

Granted.  You spend the foreseeable future at home, in a catatonic state.

I wish life were less complex.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 02:12:44 PM
I granted your wish. I have erased you from existence  >:-)

I wish i could do magic
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on August 09, 2013, 03:19:53 PM
Wish granted, but you have to pay for an hourly subscription, which is 283,000 dollars.

I wish senpai would notice me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 06:21:22 PM
Granted. He notices the bad odor that follows you around.

I wish fireworks shot out of my nipples
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 09, 2013, 06:30:27 PM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 09, 2013, 06:21:22 PM
Granted. He notices the bad odor that follows you around.

I wish fireworks shot out of my nipples

Personally I think that wish is corrupted in itself, I can't see that being pleasant even for a masochist, but,

wish granted, the aim isn't all that great and they end up destroying things and hitting you in the face

[edit: forgot to post my wish]

I wish I was 40lbs lgihter
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 09, 2013, 08:22:48 PM
Granted. You just lost one leg and one arm in a freak pony riding accident.

I wish there was an easier way to tell my friends that I'm a girl.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 10, 2013, 05:56:38 AM
Wish granted. You now have a tattoo on your forehead saying, "I'm a lady".

I wish i was a wizard
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on August 10, 2013, 07:10:35 AM
Granted. You are Dumbledore and you get killed.
I wish that I could kill all the transphobes and not have to spend a pesky life-sentence in jail.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ZoeM on August 10, 2013, 07:53:12 AM
Quote from: LocustBlotter on August 10, 2013, 07:10:35 AM
Granted. You are Dumbledore and you get killed.
I wish that I could kill all the transphobes and not have to spend a pesky life-sentence in jail.
Granted. You get twenty-one consecutive death row sentences instead.

I wish I had a pet llama.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on August 10, 2013, 08:14:53 AM
Granted, but the llama chews off your ears while you are asleep.
I wish I didn't have to fill out surveys to access certain websites.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 10, 2013, 08:46:43 AM
Granted... pending your application to the wish Depot in triplicate....  fill in this form.

I wish I was Olivia Wilde... but lesbian.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 10, 2013, 04:56:28 PM
Wish granted, but i don't find you attractive.  >:-)

I wish i had a bubble machine
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keaira on August 10, 2013, 05:01:36 PM
You get a bubble gum machine in the mail from Bertie Botts. It contains an endless supply of gum balls. the flavors are Tabasco Sauce, Marmite, Vomit  and Ear Wax.

I wish my van wasnt broken
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 10, 2013, 06:42:56 PM
Granted but someone highjacks it in preparation for GTA V and you never see it again.

I wish I had a kimono
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 10, 2013, 06:53:15 PM
Wish granted.  You had a kimono. You no longer have one.

I wish for infinite wishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on August 11, 2013, 05:41:27 AM
Granted

You get infinite wishes, but they are all the same.
You wanted a more female voice and got Julia's! ;D

You know who I mean. Ouch!

I wish for a new pussy cat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Zoe Louise Taylor on August 11, 2013, 06:28:23 AM
Quote from: Jenny07 on August 11, 2013, 05:41:27 AM
I wish for a new pussy cat.

Granted, you get a new pussy cat

But it turns out to be a lion cub and grows up and eats you! :/

I wish i could win the lottery
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 11, 2013, 06:38:59 AM
Granted.  You win the lottery and the shock kills you.

I wish the star wars prequels never happened.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 11, 2013, 07:29:18 AM
Wish granted, the Star War prequels never happened but instead George Lucas made terrible spin-offs; 'Yoda: How I Became a Jedi', 'Boba Fett: The Assassination I Regret', 'Chewbecca: The Force Within Me'.

I wish i had a bubble machine (bubbles, not bubble gums  :laugh:)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LocustToybox on August 11, 2013, 09:05:02 AM
Granted, but the bubbles are made of hydrofluoric acid.
I wish I was happy with my voice and body.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on August 11, 2013, 11:59:25 AM
Your wish is granted and you are so deliriously happy that your friends "can't stand it" and become distant

I wish for nothing and work for what is needed
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 11, 2013, 04:46:46 PM
Quote from: Tessa James on August 11, 2013, 11:59:25 AM
I wish for nothing and work for what is needed

Granted. You look around. Every thing you ever had is gone. You literally have ... Nothing.

Time to get to work...

I wish my upcoming move will go smoothly and quickly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kaitlin4475 on August 11, 2013, 05:33:23 PM
wish granted... discover new place has rodent problem and thieves stripped all the copper >:-)
I wish I had cute set of boobies and a cute but average jane body
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 12, 2013, 05:30:14 PM
Wish granted, but your boobs are constantly leaking milk everywhere

I wish I had a disco ball
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on August 12, 2013, 05:48:53 PM
Granted! You have just received a disco ball, it has a 2 inch diameter.

I wish I had a prescription for HRT, (of the appropriate assortment, quantity, and type!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on August 12, 2013, 11:57:13 PM
Wish granted but.....oh never mind you can read about all kinds of problems with HRT right here.  ;-)

I do wish my favorite brother would visit
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 13, 2013, 07:49:33 AM
Granted bur he steals from you and is no longer your favorite brother.

I wish I had more money to buy the video games I want.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 13, 2013, 04:01:37 PM
Wish granted but I took your hands.

I wish I had a wacky inflatable man
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 13, 2013, 08:11:16 PM
Wish granted,  but he realises that he is really a she inside and asks you to save up for surgery. It costs 30k.

Oooh topical :)

I wish someone would make me a sandwich.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Roxanne_Burste on August 14, 2013, 02:08:22 AM
Wish granted, but you're literally made a sandwhich. You can't walk, see, hear, feel, or taste, you can just sit there basking in your own deliciousness.  >:-)

I wish I had a vagina instead of a penis.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 14, 2013, 03:26:39 AM
Wish granted.  Its on your forehead.

I wish I had a shark with a frikkin laser beam on its head.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 14, 2013, 05:39:22 AM
Wish granted, but the shark is not ill tempered.

I wish I had a fembot
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 14, 2013, 05:41:14 AM
Granted but her personality was illegally downloaded and she tries to kill you.

I wish i could memorise the lyrics to "Billy The Mountain".
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 14, 2013, 06:18:41 AM
Granted.  We had to clear some space for it, so ultimately all you can remember are those lyrics and the alamo.

I wish I was irresistible to women.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 14, 2013, 06:20:01 AM
Wish granted, but all men hate you.

I wish i could play the guitar plays from "RDNZL" and "Drowning Witch"

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kinetik on August 14, 2013, 04:07:32 PM
Wish granted, but you can only play them backwards.

I wish I had a FleaBass.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 15, 2013, 06:36:45 AM
Granted.  A strange fish insect hybrid animal arrives in the male and drains your blood.

I wish I was like totes daubs.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 15, 2013, 03:05:45 PM
Wish granted, but in the colour of brown. (I have no idea what totes daubs is :/)

I wish a I had a monkey
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on August 15, 2013, 03:06:37 PM
Granted but it runs away

I wish my arm wasn't so itchy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 15, 2013, 03:22:22 PM
Wish granted, your arm comes alive, hack itself off, and runs away :P

I wish I didn't clog the toilet (joking!)

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 15, 2013, 03:55:18 PM
Wish granted, you clogged the sink instead

I wish I could stop time at my leisure
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on August 16, 2013, 03:57:27 AM
Granted but you can't get it going again so are stuck forever.

I wish I could go back and stop my mum meeting my dad.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 16, 2013, 06:23:54 AM
Wish granted. You get stuck in the past and you have to constantly make sure they never meet.

I wish I had a time machine
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 16, 2013, 06:25:16 AM
Wish granted, but it malfunctions and you get stuck in London during the Blitz, but hey, meet the Empty Child.

I wish i had a pair of bongos. Bongo Fury!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 12:59:43 PM
Granted, but everyone else has bongos too. So many bongos that all you hear all day, every day, are bongos bongos bongos! You get so sick of bongos that you never want to see them or hear them again, but you can never escape the bongo fury!

I wish the person from the phone company would show up already and fix my damn phone line!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 16, 2013, 04:25:33 PM
Quote from: Jillian on August 16, 2013, 12:59:43 PM
I wish the person from the phone company would show up already and fix my damn phone line!

Granted. Except they misunderstood. Now the only place you can call is the nearest dam.

I wish my divorce were over with already!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 16, 2013, 04:44:15 PM
Wish granted, but upon celebrating you black and wake up hitched to someone else.

I wish I had an ancestor that was a mob king back in the day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 16, 2013, 04:49:44 PM
Wish granted, but the mob is on your tail for some debt he still owes to them

I wish that my confusion would go away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 05:14:41 PM
Granted. You are no longer confused -- about anything! You understand EVERYTHING. And the information overload makes your head explode.

I wish celery tasted like chocolate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Zoe Louise Taylor on August 16, 2013, 05:51:15 PM
Wish Granted . . . Celery now tastes like chocolate, but you lose your taste buds, and therefore cannot taste the difference!! :/

I wish that i could go on a giant shopping spree and someone else would pay for it!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 06:16:05 PM
Granted. They paid for it alright! You shopped until THEY dropped. Dead.

I wish I could draw amazing portraits of people.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 16, 2013, 06:19:29 PM
Wish granted, but one of your portrairs comes to life and kills you.

I wish i wouldn't be afraid of costumes and go into acting.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 06:42:17 PM
Granted. You're cured of your fear of costumes and get the lead in a play, but on opening night the costumes revolt and slaughter everyone in the theatre.

I wish I could grant real wishes!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 06:45:50 PM
Aww, you caught me in mid-edit. :P

Granted. Now wish for something before times runs out and destroys the uni-- too late.

I wish I wouldn't be so picky about every little detail.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 16, 2013, 07:30:00 PM
Fine, now you're a complete slacker surrounded by flies and mold.

I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, and, I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any
other weird surprises.  You got it?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 16, 2013, 08:12:03 PM
Got it. But it still gives you food poisoning. You wanted mayo on that right? No? Oh, my bad. ::)

I wish I had a butler.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 17, 2013, 05:29:45 AM
Wish granted. They are useless.

I wish I had some Krispy Kreme donuts
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 17, 2013, 07:47:37 AM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 17, 2013, 05:29:45 AM
I wish I had some Krispy Kreme donuts

Wish granted, but only a few. 3,904 to be exact. You've now gained 400 pounds.

I wish everything in my life didn't get crazy all at the same time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 17, 2013, 05:46:12 PM
Wish granted. Your life is boring now.

I wish I could now lose the 400 pounds I gained from eating exactly 3,904 Krispy Kreme donuts
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 17, 2013, 06:36:39 PM
Wish granted, everyone else smells rosies but you always gag smelling your own

I wish I didn't get the sevre diarrhea and nausea from losing weight
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 17, 2013, 10:05:07 PM
Granted. Now you're fat again.

I wish people wouldn't be so quick to pass judgment.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 18, 2013, 05:49:22 AM
Wish granted, but tissue always magically appears and hangs out. You can't get rid of it. The more you try, the more stains appear.


I wish I had a cowboy hat
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 18, 2013, 09:59:13 AM
Granted, Unfortunately its too small for your head.

I wish houses where affordable.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Phoenix_2812 on August 18, 2013, 10:24:48 AM
Granted. You can now buy an affordable house, although everyone has moved onto massive spaceships at no cost and are moving to far away planets and you're all alone. :eusa_boohoo:

I wish I could fly.

Chris
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: CalmRage on August 18, 2013, 12:33:36 PM
Granted, but he's a complete douche.


I wish i was the next Jimi Hendrix
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 18, 2013, 02:45:45 PM
Wish granted. You start believing in yourself and continue to do so, but no one else does.

I wish could eat souls
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 19, 2013, 06:40:08 PM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 18, 2013, 02:45:45 PM
Wish granted. You start believing in yourself and continue to do so, but no one else does.

I wish could eat souls

Granted. Filet of Dover sole sauteed in a white wine sauce.

I wish people would stop thinking that the world is entitled to know I'm trans.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 20, 2013, 04:45:29 AM
Wish granted. Everyone can now read minds so be careful.

I wish I could lick my elbow
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 20, 2013, 01:16:18 PM
Granted. You now have an arm on your face.

I wish I didn't have scars on my legs. :(

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 20, 2013, 05:45:54 PM
Wish granted. You have moles instead now.

I wish I didn't have scars as well :/
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Night Haven on August 20, 2013, 06:13:47 PM
Wish granted. You're invisible; soon you'll be on the run from government-endorsed mad scientists.

I wish... I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 20, 2013, 08:06:24 PM
Wish granted, but unfortunately because of horrible pollution, humans die instantly if they leave their cone huts.  :(

I wish I had three day weekends.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 21, 2013, 05:58:41 AM
Wish granted, but you have to work overtime during the week.

I wish I had all the time in the world to do whatever I want to
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 21, 2013, 09:50:46 AM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 21, 2013, 05:58:41 AM
Wish granted, but you have to work overtime during the week.

I wish I had all the time in the world to do whatever I want to

Granted. Alas, your time freezer is jammed in the on position.

I wish that I weren't constantly bombarded by advertising.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 21, 2013, 12:47:32 PM
Granted. Now you're constantly bombarded by yellow snowballs.

I wish it would stop raining.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 21, 2013, 12:56:56 PM
Quote from: Jillian on August 21, 2013, 12:47:32 PM
I wish it would stop raining.

Welcome to Mars!

I wish money grew on trees. Literally.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 21, 2013, 02:03:32 PM
Wish granted. Most people become hostile trying to gather money.... You get killed by me ;)

I wish I had I could erase things from my memory
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 21, 2013, 02:07:42 PM
Granted. Your hippocampus trots away to the stables.

I wish the world were flat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 21, 2013, 02:15:08 PM
Wish granted, but in order to become flat the world had to be squashed out - like dough under a rolling pin - so now everybody is paper thin and dead.

I wish I could play the Cello.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 21, 2013, 02:44:23 PM
You can... as long as it's tuned in fourths! Hah!

I wish I could travel back in time.





Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 21, 2013, 02:57:36 PM
Granted. You travel back to before the earth existed and, having no way to travel forwards again, you freeze and implode in the lonely vacuum of space.

I wish my house had a secret passage!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 21, 2013, 03:05:29 PM
Granted. Your house is now a Klein Bottle.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2Fthumb%2F5%2F5c%2FKlein_bottle.svg%2F240px-Klein_bottle.svg.png&hash=d20f5c07d58e6209264c5c5688e08c7291cca271)

I wish that my banjo would stay in tune.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 22, 2013, 04:27:47 AM
Wish grated, but whatever you play sounds awful.

I wish there was a Pokemon game with all the regions


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 22, 2013, 04:58:51 AM
Granted but all the Pokemon die in a hell type fire.

I wish my bad luck would come to an end.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 22, 2013, 07:34:40 AM
Luckily a piano falls on you, ending you run of bad luck.

I wish I could make you all happy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 22, 2013, 04:04:53 PM
Wish granted, but at the cost that you will never be.

I wish my new card arrived tomorrow
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 22, 2013, 04:33:16 PM
It did arrive tomorrow, only by the time you get there it wont be there anymore....

I wish the next person's wish on this thread is the same as mine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on August 22, 2013, 08:24:08 PM
Granted. The thread continues on this way forever but the universe isolates the loop and rejects the paradox, forcing my wish to change.

I wish for free internet access for all. :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: TheLance on August 22, 2013, 09:19:14 PM
Granted, but it is very limited and government monitored internet access.

I wish life was easier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 23, 2013, 04:53:11 AM
Wish granted, but you can't afford the price that is in place.

I wish I was a peeping tom -shrugs-

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 23, 2013, 04:29:41 PM
Wish granted. You wear a cape and get sucked into an airplane. "No capes!"

I wish I had powerful telescope
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 23, 2013, 05:28:35 PM
Granted! Power telescope--complete with flawed mirror and resulting spherical aberration.

I wish that I could overcome uncertainty.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on August 23, 2013, 06:00:13 PM
Wish granted, you are now sure about every decision you ever have to make and life becomes boring.

I wish the next person to post would post this:

"Wish granted but now the thread will be going into an infinite loop

I wish the next person to post would post this:

"Wish granted but not the thread will be going into an infinite loop""
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 23, 2013, 06:13:58 PM
The universe implodes in a fugue of self-reference.

I wish that I could move objects with my mind.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 24, 2013, 04:04:35 AM
Wish granted. You can move objects with your mind, but you'll never get the hang of it.

I wish I teleport
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on August 24, 2013, 08:47:03 AM
Wish granted.  The destination is random.

I wish I was a super heroine.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 24, 2013, 01:56:00 PM
Wish granted, but you are really clumsy.

I wish next day delivery was free and guaranteed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on August 24, 2013, 07:13:13 PM
Wish granted, But only on things you don't want.

I wish I never had to pay for anything.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 25, 2013, 05:48:29 AM
Wished granted. You no longer need to pay for things as you are now invisible.

I wish I could find that one song I am looking for
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 25, 2013, 08:45:23 AM
Granted. All songs now sound indistinguishable.

As I young child, I used to wish for one of these:

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimages2.wikia.nocookie.net%2F__cb20070709025203%2Fcandh%2Fimages%2F5%2F5a%2FTransmogrifier_zap.png&hash=8733d2465b2ae056c458e58f864fec0460ab5397)

I still wish I had one now.

Maddy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on August 25, 2013, 02:02:08 PM
Wish granted but it malfunctions and never transforms you into what you want.

I wish I always knew the answer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 25, 2013, 02:06:40 PM
Wish granted. You know the answer to everything but you speak backwards.

I wish my external harddrive was working
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 25, 2013, 02:16:00 PM
Granted, it works well but can't seem to communicate with your computer.

I wish I had money for a lavish lifestyle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on August 25, 2013, 04:25:00 PM
Wish Granted, but you run into your grand mother and are scared by the image of her and your grandfather being intimate running through her head.

I wish I was a shape shiftier.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 25, 2013, 05:38:03 PM
Quote from: ComplicatedMe on August 25, 2013, 04:25:00 PM
I wish I was a shape shiftier.

Granted. You're a triangle. Now you're a square. Back to a triangle again. Oops, now you're a circle...

I hope my students accept me as a female tomorrow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 25, 2013, 05:45:04 PM
Quote from: suzifrommd on August 25, 2013, 05:38:03 PM
Granted. You're a triangle. Now you're a square. Back to a triangle again. Oops, now you're a circle...

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fd202m5krfqbpi5.cloudfront.net%2Fbooks%2F1328835831l%2F108302.jpg&hash=536ad9828ff19457913524a336bad6d43866d545)

;D ;D ;D

Quote from: suzifrommd on August 25, 2013, 05:38:03 PM
I hope my students accept me as a female tomorrow.

Honestly, I can't corrupt this one. I hope they do, too.

I wish that school bathrooms weren't gendered. I'm convinced that's half the problem.  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on August 25, 2013, 07:04:08 PM
Wish granted, whatever it may have been

I wish folks were able to stay on topic
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 25, 2013, 07:08:39 PM
Quote from: V M on August 25, 2013, 07:04:08 PM
Wish granted, whatever it may have been

I wish folks were able to stay on topic

Granted. We all produce identical widgets for the rest of eternity.

I wish the threading structure were two dimensional, so that tangents didn't disrupt the flow of the main discussion.  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 26, 2013, 03:20:29 PM
Wish granted. The forum now operates in all 11 dimensions. Unfortunately, as you are only able to perceive four of them, you are missing out on a lot. (Though tangents are, indeed, now far less in intrusive).

I wish I had a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 26, 2013, 04:07:30 PM
Wish granted. It makes your brain go mushy. You couldn't handle it. You'll never be the same again.

I wish I had more time
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 26, 2013, 04:54:49 PM
Wish granted, but the universe implodes so that nothing is left except time and your consciousness.

I wish no one ever felt alone.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on August 26, 2013, 05:00:20 PM
Wish granted but there is never any privacy and someone is always with you.

I wish I was the best in the world at something.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 26, 2013, 05:41:53 PM
You are, no else can be you like you can.

Wish granted, but no one appreciates it so it just don't matter.

I wish for a well paid hobby.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 26, 2013, 05:49:48 PM
Wish granted. You take up garbage sculpting... it smells so awful that people pay you to go away.

I wish I could impress people with displays of physical prowess.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 26, 2013, 07:25:24 PM
Wish granted. They arrive. ...But they like it so much that they just keep coming back, in greater and greater numbers. And before you know it Earth is an alien holiday resort and humans, regarded as nothing more than the local wildlife, are photographed and gawked at by alien tourists on tacky safaris. Some of us are even shot and mounted and brought back as rugs to furnish alien homes. Not to mention the illegal pet trade that springs up...

...I wish I didn't get so carried away in corrupting wishes.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 26, 2013, 07:50:46 PM
Wish granted, but the cows are so heavy they break the trees limbs, fall, and hurt themselves.

I wish my dog didn't shed so much.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lajs on August 27, 2013, 02:20:55 AM
Granted - a new type of person comes along who is twice as unreasonable, making all those who seemed unreasonable before now seem much more reasonable in comparison.

I wish I had a chariot.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SaveMeJeebus on August 27, 2013, 06:03:12 AM
I can't believe I read carrot. I was going to say, 'Wish granted, you get a carrot but you have to eat the stalk.' That is corruptible, is not it no?  ::). If you wish for me to corrupt the chariot as well, well then... You get a chariot, but with square wheels and no horses.

I wish my laptop battery didn't die on me today ;_;


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on August 27, 2013, 06:44:45 AM
Quote from: SaveMeJeebus on August 27, 2013, 06:03:12 AM
I wish my laptop battery didn't die on me today ;_;

Granted. It's a live. You can't kill it. It's got a mind of its own. It's sending messages to everyone you know. You can't stop it!

I wish estrogen didn't make me gain weight around my middle.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 27, 2013, 07:05:09 AM
granted, you now have a very big caboose.


I wish I knew how to foil corrupt wishes.  (no aluminum please.)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on August 27, 2013, 12:18:43 PM
Granted, you know how to foil them but you can't actually do it.

I wish cleaning didn't take so long.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on August 31, 2013, 05:10:36 PM
Granted, cleaning is now a breeze and you turn to drink to fill the spare time.

I want to be a witch!

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.futurama-madhouse.com%2Fgrabs%2F3acv18%2F318-25.jpg&hash=de1002db13ed2fe10ea2a93bcda9983109e9627b)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 31, 2013, 05:15:29 PM
Granted.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.burton-on-trent.org.uk%2Fwp-content%2Fimages%2FEarlyHistory%2FStake.jpg&hash=ae53233a8eb3278d43fe093ab9764ecc6fac7267)

I wish that my banjo would stay in tune.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 31, 2013, 08:21:27 PM
Granted, but it got lost in the lost luggage area of an airplane.

I wish my bank would hurry up with my replacement ATM card so I could renew my subscription to Susan's.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on August 31, 2013, 08:30:55 PM
Done, and when you do, you accidentally sign up for the "Plutonium Subscription" valued at $2200/year. Good for the site, hard on the bank balance.

I wish I had more time to read.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 31, 2013, 08:39:30 PM
Wish granted, unfortunately you only have more time because a giant hurricane came through and knocked all the power out. It's nighttime and you have no flashlights or candles to read by,

I wish I could eat all day, only workout when I feel like it, and still be in perfect health and have a perfect figure.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on August 31, 2013, 08:46:59 PM
Granted but now you  eat all day and have no time for things like friends or spending money.

LOL @Plutonium Subscription.

Now if only there was a lifetime subscription amount.

I wish for sanity. I keep asking at every store I go to and they always say they are fresh out.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jenny07 on August 31, 2013, 08:51:05 PM
Granted
I get you a $100 gift voucher for Sanity.

I wish to be slightly more annoying
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: DriftingCrow on August 31, 2013, 08:52:29 PM
Granted, you're more annoying but people like to hang out with, and bother you all the time, because now you're a rich celebrity and everyone wants to have the high life rub off on them.

I wish I could just snap my fingers and things would clean itself like in Mary Poppins. **snap, snap**  :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on September 01, 2013, 05:42:39 AM
Quote from: LearnedHand on August 31, 2013, 08:52:29 PM
I wish I could just snap my fingers and things would clean itself like in Mary Poppins. **snap, snap**  :(

It works great. So well, in fact, that you spend most of your time all day every day searching for stuff that got magically put away heaven knows where.

I wish school administrators would realize that every hour a teacher spends in a meeting is an hour taken away from activities that actually benefit students.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on September 01, 2013, 06:49:50 AM
granted, but you do it so well that they double your class size

I wish I could read minds sometimes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on September 01, 2013, 11:39:41 AM
Granted (and you did add that qualifier of "sometimes") but sometimes you hear too much and decide to become a hermit living far from our tedious thoughts.

I wish that you all were here to party with.  Its the Labor Day weekend!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on September 01, 2013, 11:47:46 AM
I came to party, but everyone was called to evacuate.



My hermit shell needs redecorating. I wish someone new a good cheap home decorator for hermit shells.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ComplicatedMe on September 01, 2013, 05:35:54 PM
Wish granted, but he only works one day a year so it'll take him years to do it.

I wish everything I like came in my size.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on September 01, 2013, 10:26:56 PM
granted but it's too expensive for you

I wish I was a smart person.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: wrabbit on September 22, 2013, 05:04:41 PM
*poof* you're now a genius but horrendously ugly!

I wish I had a never ending bowl of ramen
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 22, 2013, 08:39:49 PM
Wow, I totally forgot about this thread

Wish granted only you can't stop eating it and your whole life is all about eating ramen

I wish the world was the way I want it to be
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Darkie on September 22, 2013, 09:07:06 PM
The world is the way you want it to be, but you are trapped in a bunker underground.

I wish I had a beautiful house in a small town.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keely Mcbain on September 22, 2013, 10:09:13 PM
Quote from: Darkie on September 22, 2013, 09:07:06 PM

I wish I had a beautiful house in a small town.

Your wish is Granted!
Unfortunately it's the Only nice house in this small town that has attracted a large group of thugs and criminals.

I wish I had some nice tasty Bacon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 22, 2013, 10:15:08 PM
Quote from: Keely Mcbain on September 22, 2013, 10:09:13 PM
Your wish is Granted!
Unfortunately it's the Only nice house in this small town that has attracted a large group of thugs and criminals.

I wish I had some nice tasty Bacon.

Wish granted!
Only the bacon is rotted partly and you get AIDs from it.

I wish i was a pretty, long living, happy girl. :laugh:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Keely Mcbain on September 22, 2013, 10:20:19 PM
Quote from: Xhianil on September 22, 2013, 10:15:08 PM

I wish i was a pretty, long living, happy girl. :laugh:

Granted. Although. something goes wrong with the tansition and you're now a wish you where a guy.

I wish I was a more confident person.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Darkie on September 22, 2013, 10:31:53 PM
You're now a more confident person but everyone is intimidated by your confidence and shys away from you.

I wish I had unlimited money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 22, 2013, 10:36:37 PM
Quote from: Darkie on September 22, 2013, 10:31:53 PM
You're now a more confident person but everyone is intimidated by your confidence and shys away from you.

I wish I had unlimited money.

Wish granted, go to the nearest blackhole and reach in to collect.

I wish for the ability to cause spontaneous human combustion to those who hate me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 22, 2013, 10:42:12 PM
Wish granted but you start to feel the guilt of killing people that have children and other loved ones who care about them, you begin to hate yourself and therefore spontaneously combust as well

Wish I could be part of that woooooooooooooooooooooooooorld
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: lovelessheart on September 23, 2013, 06:43:16 PM
wish granted. you now live in a world where humans are the ants and ants are the humans.                                    i wish he loved me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 23, 2013, 08:01:55 PM
Wish granted, he loves you but you realize for you it was just a crush

I wish I had control over everything.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 23, 2013, 08:24:08 PM
Wish granted, you now control everything, but now nothing functions without you controling it and billions die.

I wish for a tasty, fresh cooked, BLT.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Darkie on September 23, 2013, 08:40:14 PM
Quote from: Xhianil on September 23, 2013, 08:24:08 PM
Wish granted, you now control everything, but now nothing functions without you controling it and billions die.

I wish for a tasty, fresh cooked, BLT.

You are given a fresh BLT but later find out the B doesn't stand for Bacon.  It stands for Baby.

I wish I could have a penguin named Pengy-san.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 23, 2013, 11:15:02 PM
Wish granted, sadly the penguin has rabies and eats your face.

I wish for a heart smily, as in <3.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on September 23, 2013, 11:17:01 PM
Granted but it only lasts for a day.

I wish all of the "guests" would come back here.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 23, 2013, 11:18:40 PM
Wish granted, all the guest come back, along with every spammer.

I wish for mars.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 24, 2013, 12:36:25 AM
You own the planet, but since you can't get there or do anything with it, it doesn't mean anything.

I wish for a tasty steak dinner
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on September 24, 2013, 12:39:21 AM
Granted but you have to cook it.

I wish I had a ballon that was popped.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 24, 2013, 12:44:06 AM
Granted, it mutates into a moster that gets revenge on you for popping it.

I wish for the deed to the USA.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: lovelessheart on September 24, 2013, 07:09:18 AM
wish granted. but the world has ended two seconds ago so everything is now nothing.                        i wish my hair would grow down to my butt whenever i want.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on September 27, 2013, 04:22:00 PM
Granted, but now your torso shrinks as well, so your hair and butt meet in the middle. ;)

I wish for an edible, tangible, delicious (to me) chocolate chip cookie.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: lovelessheart on September 28, 2013, 12:09:30 PM
wish grated but everything that is good to you now will be nasty and everything nasty to you will be good.                  i wish i was a mermaid
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on September 28, 2013, 03:27:48 PM
Wish granted, only you get a fish body and a humans legs.

I wish the drinking age was 15 in the USA.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on September 29, 2013, 01:31:28 PM
Granted. Fifteen martian years, that is.

I wish my dog would go walk herself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: calico on September 29, 2013, 07:34:04 PM
Granted your  dog can walk herself, but someone calls the pound and she is picked up.

I wish the IRS would disappear, and the letter they sent me  >:(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on September 29, 2013, 07:57:12 PM
Granted.  The irs and all their communications are now invisible to you.   They however can still see you.

I wish it was legal to punch people who stop at the top of escalators.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 29, 2013, 08:22:46 PM
Hate to corrupt a wish that I agree with....but

Wish granted but its also legal for them to punch back

I wish I knew Jesus
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: lovelessheart on September 29, 2013, 10:15:35 PM
wish granted. you punch people but you feel the pain.                        i wish i won could win the lottery
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on September 29, 2013, 11:11:34 PM
Quote from: lovelessheart on September 29, 2013, 10:15:35 PM
wish granted. you punch people but you feel the pain.                        i wish i won could win the lottery

Am I invisible?
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: wrabbit on September 30, 2013, 08:13:44 PM
No you're not~ i gotcha

You now know Jesus, but he's actually a large fishlike creature, not at all like you expected him to be

I wish I could fly (not like in a plane, i mean like my body can fly~!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 01, 2013, 08:48:50 AM
Wish granted, but now you get horribly airsick.

I wish for a nice, frosty root-beer. :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on October 01, 2013, 11:45:41 AM
Quote from: robinmack on October 01, 2013, 08:48:50 AM
I wish for a nice, frosty root-beer. :)

Granted. It's frosty. Really frosty. In fact it's a solid block of ice. You fall asleep waiting for it to melt. When you wake up you have one of those creases on your face from sleeping on something textured that takes all day to go away.

I wish I could have just one day without painful drama.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 01, 2013, 01:22:44 PM
Granted, but you sleep through it.  So there.  ;)

I wish for a flashlight is fully charged and never burns out when I need it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on October 01, 2013, 04:51:32 PM
Wish granted, you now lose 100 pounds every minute.

I wish the earth was a cookie.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 01, 2013, 04:57:54 PM
Granted, but alas, the rules of physics being what they are, the cookie doesn't have enough mass to avoid imploding into a highly compressed, gooey ball of super-hot scorched cookie dough, destroying all life as it becomes a toll-house cookie ball of doom the size of North Dakota.

I wish I had a butt. ;)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on October 01, 2013, 07:07:35 PM
Quote from: robinmack on October 01, 2013, 04:57:54 PM
I wish I had a butt. ;)

Oh Robin, you make it too easy.

Granted. You're riding down the highway when some slob in a dirty pick-up tosses his cigarette butt through your open window. It's now all yours...

I wish this headache would go away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on October 01, 2013, 07:50:14 PM
Wish granted, but you should have specified US currency, now you're stuck with 1 million Zimbabwe dollars, worth nothing but the paper they're printed on.

I wish I could control all of space and time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on October 02, 2013, 06:50:01 AM
Quote from: <3 on October 01, 2013, 07:50:14 PM

I wish I could control all of space and time.

Granted. You are all powerful. You are hit with such information overload, your first thought is "make it stop." Oops, you're back to being yourself. Oh well.

I wish there were good news for a change.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 02, 2013, 09:54:28 AM
*POOF* a four-inch band starting at your forehead disappears, leaving you with your hairline coming in at your eyebrows.  ;)

I wish I had a publisher for my novel.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on October 02, 2013, 12:58:16 PM
Quote from: robinmack on October 02, 2013, 09:54:28 AM
*POOF* a four-inch band starting at your forehead disappears, leaving you with your hairline coming in at your eyebrows.  ;)

I wish I had a publisher for my novel.

Granted. A vanity press cons you out of thousands, but your book is published.

[seriously though] Try Createspace.com. You can publish a book (and listed it on the prominant e-book sites) for the cost of a single copy.[/seriously though]

I wish my wife and I could finally agree on a divorce settlement and move on already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on October 02, 2013, 05:20:09 PM
Granted. Your butt's in gear. Coal miners gear. NOW GET TO WORK!

I wish I had a big office to count the profits from my coal mining industry.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Darkie on October 02, 2013, 07:58:03 PM
Quote from: Devlyn Marie on October 02, 2013, 05:20:09 PM
Granted. Your butt's in gear. Coal miners gear. NOW GET TO WORK!

I wish I had a big office to count the profits from my coal mining industry.

You get your big office but unfortunately the building has a mouse problem and now you share your office with a nice little family of 2 parent mice and 25 children.

I wish I could have close friends where I live that actually have time to hang out with me..
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on October 03, 2013, 08:41:08 AM
Granted. Your washing machine just died.

I wish that I weren't bald.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 03, 2013, 11:26:56 AM
Granted.  *Poof*  You now live in Saudi Arabia, where, as a woman, you are not permitted to leave the house without a full hijab and the permission of a male who is responsible for you.  :P

I wish for women's rights world-wide to be the equal of men's
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on October 04, 2013, 04:52:23 AM
Wish granted, every girl now has the same rights as a male felon in prison.

I wish for a healthy, playful, cute, well behaved puppy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alice Rogers on October 04, 2013, 04:57:44 AM
Granted 'Tada!!' You now have a healthy, playful, cute, well behaved puppy and it only cost you your entire life savings!

I wish for a more feminine shape that looks damn good in my girly clothes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Danielle Emmalee on October 04, 2013, 06:18:49 AM
Wish granted, you never wake up, you just sleep forever.

I wish I could find that math thread started by Jamie D.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MoonThief on October 07, 2013, 07:37:13 PM
You are able to sleep, but you don't wake up until 5 years pass.


I wish I could visit the moon.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Darkie on October 07, 2013, 08:22:14 PM
You get to visit the moon but your spaceship breaks down and you are stuck there.

I wish I never get dementia as that is most likely my fate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 08, 2013, 09:46:24 AM
Alakazam!  Your car is suddenly shiny and new, with all the upgrades.  You can see the knobby thingies on the brand new luxury tires and a glint of sunlight from the polished chrome around the license plate catches on the tears on your face as the car speeds away, driven by a car thief.

I wish I had another 12 ounces of fresh, non-poisonous, delicious tasting coffee at 105 degrees Fahrenheit in temperature.  ;)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: King Malachite on October 09, 2013, 07:25:08 AM
Quote from: robinmack on October 08, 2013, 09:46:24 AM
Alakazam!  Your car is suddenly shiny and new, with all the upgrades.  You can see the knobby thingies on the brand new luxury tires and a glint of sunlight from the polished chrome around the license plate catches on the tears on your face as the car speeds away, driven by a car thief.

I wish I had another 12 ounces of fresh, non-poisonous, delicious tasting coffee at 105 degrees Fahrenheit in temperature.  ;)

Granted but before you have a change to drink it, you spill it all over yourself.  Have fun with that.  :)

I wish an easy job where I wouldn't have to talk to people and had great pay would just fall into my lap.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 09, 2013, 08:45:57 AM
*poof*  You have an awesome, fulfilling the job where you can stretch your skills and are appreciated for all that you do, all from the comfort of your own office.  It's for a foundation for the deaf, owned, staffed, and managed by deaf people.  Unfortunately, this includes you now.  Oh, and you are paid in currency local to this foundation, which turns out to be intricately carved boulders of two to three hundred pounds apiece, which drop into your lap at regular intervals. ;)

I wish for my girlfriend to be restored to perfect health.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: wrabbit on October 10, 2013, 11:57:13 AM
wish granted... but now that no one is breaking the law, they decided there's no gray area for uncertain situations and the court system is dismantled in favor of an automated one, sending many innocent people into detention   :(

I wish I could eat whatever i wanted and i wouldn't ever get fat from it!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Makalii on October 11, 2013, 11:58:43 AM
Granted. You've developed a rare disorder where unless you're eating every second of every day, you will starve to death.

I wish my mother would let me start taking estrogen.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on October 11, 2013, 01:03:22 PM
Granted,but she no longer cares about anything you do good or bad and you end up losing the essential her.


I wish I would heal faster so I could attempt to pay my bills before I lose my home,...again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on October 12, 2013, 10:25:16 PM
Granted. You lose your home and suffer internal bleeding!  >:-) ::) (response courtesy of my eight-year-old)

I wish that everything in life goes wrong (again, courtesy of my eight-year-old)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lauren5 on October 12, 2013, 10:29:09 PM
Granted, but everything in your life goes left.
I wish I could be myself at all times.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kittenswithmittens on October 16, 2013, 06:53:05 AM
Granted, but turns out you're actually a maple tree and not a willow!

I wish I could fly! ^-^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on October 16, 2013, 11:56:51 AM
You got it Hon but it was before there were people.

I wish our lives could more readily be understood by the masses

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lauren5 on October 16, 2013, 12:01:15 PM
Granted, but the masses are Kilogrammes.

I wish I could find my keys.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: suzifrommd on October 16, 2013, 12:05:44 PM
Quote from: Willow on October 16, 2013, 12:01:15 PM
Granted, but the masses are Kilogrammes.

I wish I could find my keys.

Granted: Clairvoyant powers that allow you to know the location of every key in the entire world. Your phone won't stop ringing. Everyone wants you to help find their keys.

I wish I had a more supportive group of friends.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 16, 2013, 12:08:14 PM
Quote from: suzifrommd on October 16, 2013, 12:05:44 PM
Granted: Clairvoyant powers that allow you to know the location of every key in the entire world. Your phone won't stop ringing. Everyone wants you to help find their keys.

I wish I had a more supportive group of friends.

Granted!  Your current friends all become pillars of the community.  Literally.  I mean, they are instantly transformed into stone and used to prop up the roof of the local community center.  ;)

I wish wishes were fishes...  :)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lauren5 on October 16, 2013, 12:11:44 PM
Granted, it rains trout.

I wish I could hug you lovely people.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Abby on October 16, 2013, 12:35:51 PM
Granted, but porcupine embellishment is very in this season.

I wish I could find my stupid phone charger which seems to have up and left
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on October 16, 2013, 12:51:03 PM
Granted. You're raking leaves for an eternity.

I wish I had some chocolate. (Again!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Robin Mack on October 16, 2013, 12:58:23 PM
Granted!  A nibble of the most miraculous chocolate materializes in your mouth and settles on your tongue, melting instantly and filling your mouth with its flavor.  It is unlike any chocolate you have ever tasted; so amazing that it must have been perfectly tailored to your unique taste, adjusted for your individual taste buds.  You are blown away by this, the ultimate chocolate experience.

Alas, you spend your life searching in vain to recreate the experience; that chocolate simply does not exist anywhere in the world.

I wish my cell phone screen would repair itself.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kittenswithmittens on October 16, 2013, 01:05:35 PM
Granted, but it has no battery.

I wish some of the world's greatest (and now dead) artists would have made so much more material when they were still alive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kittenswithmittens on October 19, 2013, 10:37:53 AM
Quote from: Joules on October 16, 2013, 02:19:51 PM
Granted.  A vast treasure trove of previously unpublished material is discovered in the basement of Capitol records, hours and hours worth from every previously published musician.  Unfortunately, you died in the earthquake that caused the discovery of the material.

I wish my nose would stop running.

Granted. Grats on a chronically clogged nose.

I wish the snow would go away.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Alaia on October 24, 2013, 03:57:25 AM
Granted. Welcome to the sunny side of Mercury.

I wish I could get some sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on October 27, 2013, 03:57:23 PM
Have fun, Sleeping Beauty...

I wish that the police would break up the gang of local thugs using the playground across the street from my house as their turf.  :-\
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ~RoadToTrista~ on October 28, 2013, 01:54:32 PM
Granted. You are now toddler sized. We will have so much fun finding frilly little toddler dresses for you!! *picks you up*


I wish more people would participate in mah story thread. =D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on November 03, 2013, 12:52:43 AM
Granted. Special interest groups railroad the thread!

I wish explicit evidence would emerge linking Stephen Harper to the Senate expense scandal. Liar!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Lauren5 on November 03, 2013, 12:55:43 AM
Granted, but for some reason Stephen Harper becomes president for life and nothing can happen to him because of it.

I wish I didn't have to pay for the essential women things that normally your mother buys for you the first time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 03, 2013, 02:59:14 PM
Granted, but you won a years worth in a contest you never entered and they gladly promote their stuff with your name in public media.


I wish I knew where I am going to be by next summer.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on November 06, 2013, 09:30:02 PM
Granted. Welcome to HELL! >:-)

I wish dogs and cats would unite!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: BurningBrilliance on November 06, 2013, 09:36:30 PM
Quote from: Jillian on November 06, 2013, 09:30:02 PM
Granted. Welcome to HELL! >:-)

I wish dogs and cats would unite!

Granted but they unite to destroy our homes, it's pet anarchy (at least for dogs and cats). They're dumping the litter box on your bed, leaving presents on the couch, and what happened to your cousins canary, the one he loves more than you?

Kay, it's my turn. I wish I was invisible.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 06, 2013, 09:40:55 PM
Granted, but my genie powers suck and it turned off gravity whenever you are invisible.


I wish for peace.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on November 06, 2013, 09:45:02 PM
Granted. The world disarms, everyone becomes friends, and aliens enslave the human race.

I wish I could shape shift!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 06, 2013, 09:52:26 PM
Granted but the bones never quite make it and you are left as a flesh bag of bones.


Inner peace Please!!!!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on November 06, 2013, 10:05:02 PM
Granted absolutely but you become bored after the first million years of it

I wish I could meet you
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on November 06, 2013, 10:12:59 PM
Granted as That's already happening too but she chooses to be demure and less revealing?

I wish for normal intestinal flora


Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JillSter on November 07, 2013, 01:34:44 AM
It's summer, but you're on Mercury.

I wish people were friendlier to strangers.
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mariax on November 07, 2013, 04:09:46 AM
Quote from: Jillian on November 07, 2013, 01:34:44 AM
It's summer, but you're on Mercury.

I wish people were friendlier to strangers.
Granted! Complete strangers will smile at you all... day... long.

I wish the laundry would fold itself...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 07, 2013, 08:27:16 AM
Granted but origami laundry isn't fun to unfold for wearing or fit in a dresser drawer.



I wish for a way out of my dismal existence .
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Xhianil on November 07, 2013, 08:29:06 AM
Wish granted, you get mine.

I wish for a gun.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 07, 2013, 02:35:06 PM
Granted, it is still summer, but you never asked about leaving that other planet and so you remain.


I wish for 2 lavender tuxes and 1 gorgeous lavender dress for Amy.
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Mariax on November 07, 2013, 04:39:35 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on November 07, 2013, 02:35:06 PM
Granted, it is still summer, but you never asked about leaving that other planet and so you remain.


I wish for 2 lavender tuxes and 1 gorgeous lavender dress for Amy.
Granted! You both get picketed by Elton John because you make lavender look better than he ever could.

I wish the morning train wasn't so crowded.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 07, 2013, 04:46:20 PM
Granted, you are on the sole train to nowhere.


I wish I made sense in my own mind.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on November 09, 2013, 12:31:29 PM
Granted, but you don't make sense at all in the outside world.  :icon_boxing:

I wish that I didn't need to sleep.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 09, 2013, 12:47:04 PM
Granted, but now you have so much spare time on your hands that you bore yourself to death.

I wish I were better at easing others mental anguish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on November 09, 2013, 06:06:08 PM
Granted with an amen on that one for our fellow travelers so seriously in pain.  With anguish universally resolved however, people forget how to cope and reach out on their own

I wish you and I could make a rescue visit to Texas
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 09, 2013, 06:13:52 PM
Quote from: Tessa James on November 09, 2013, 06:06:08 PM
I wish you and I could make a rescue visit to Texas

Me too. So instead of granting it, I'm adding my wish to yours.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kittenswithmittens on November 09, 2013, 06:26:19 PM
Quote from: LordKAT on November 09, 2013, 06:13:52 PM
Me too. So instead of granting it, I'm adding my wish to yours.

Ah, mathematics. A wish to a wish is a negative wish so it gets granted, but then it gets ungranted.

I want a glass of soda.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on November 09, 2013, 08:21:11 PM
Granted but with "special" math 2 Cat wishes equally cancel leaving us wishful-filled again and your soda overflowing with effervescent love

I wish we all felt the love of ages
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on November 09, 2013, 10:09:00 PM
Granted, everyone is hugged and smothered by their dead great grandparents.


I wish I could do something right. Somehow, I think I missed the mark again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on January 29, 2014, 07:47:09 AM
Granted. You became such a goody goody two shoes, you were locked in a windowless cell and died from the lack of sunshine.

I wish I was the first woman on Mars
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadeleineG on February 12, 2014, 07:49:01 AM
Granted.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fd1w7nqlfxfj094.cloudfront.net%2Fwp-content%2Fuploads%2F2013%2F05%2FWelcome_to_Mars.jpg&hash=ec70f16ca38c4f9f4fa041f0f680e69aeffdfbdd)

I wish I were more aware of interpersonal politics.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on February 12, 2014, 08:09:10 AM
 :icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_lol: :icon_mrhappy: :icon_mrhappy:  Qwynne that is just sooooo funny.

Granted
Unfortunately you became so aware of interpersonal politics that you ended up prejudging everyone so much you were forced to become a recluse, were shipped off to a desert island and died shortly afterwards when you failed to resolve an internal political dilemma.


I wish I was a spinning top.. (A red one of course  ;D)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Vyx405 on March 05, 2014, 05:02:58 AM
Granted: You are now a red spinning top, however you are a beyblade and must now participate in a 12 on 12 battle to the death.

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fak2.static.dailymotion.com%2Fstatic%2Fvideo%2F930%2F444%2F20444039%3Ajpeg_preview_large.jpg%3F20100329000953&hash=c534a8143ab7babe3c378b50753949256ee1f287)

I wish I was as cute as a newborn wolf pup. :laugh:
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 05, 2014, 06:04:24 AM
Granted.
Regrettably you inherited a latent genetic disorder that saw you transform into a handsome Prince, only to be usurped by Shrek and deposed to live in exile in a green slime swampy back water of the kingdom.

I wish I was the first woman on Mars.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: FalseHybridPrincess on March 05, 2014, 06:16:30 AM
Granted.Though while you were on mars the earth got destroyed by a meteorite so you died alone there :/

I wish I had money
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 05, 2014, 06:38:21 AM
Granted
Unfortunately as you were one of the few to have it, the Govt levied a 500% tax on you to pay fore the gross domestic debt. As you weren't able to pay they threw in jail and threw away the key. You died in jail, a pauper.

I wish I had a ship the size of QE2 so I could entertain all the poor and disadvantaged people on earth, and show them they can make it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on March 05, 2014, 08:35:53 AM
Granted! *insert trite and predictable thunderclap here*

Unfortunately as you are singing and dancing to entertain the disenfranchised passengers the ship strikes an iceberg covered in hungry polar-bears.
You and many of the passengers are trampled underfoot and eaten whilst scrambling towards the lifeboats.
Those who do make it to the relative safety of the lifeboats soon discover that not only can the bears swim comfortably in freezing water, but that their claws have a way of puncturing inflatable refuges (as well as refugees).

I wish that I really had the power to grant wishes.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on March 06, 2014, 10:29:19 AM
TA-DAR.  Shezam !!! Boooooom.  GRANTED!!!

You became the Grand Poobah Master of wishes. You grant sooooooo many wishes, so quickly, you get caught up in the rapidly changing landscape so much so, you have to seek shelter, or risk being consumed in the diatribe of events.

Finding a rusty old lamp in the corner, you leap in slamming shut the lid so tight, it will never open again. Sadly, nobody ever found that rusty old lamp, and over the years it became entombed in the shifting sands of time. You spent the remaining years alone and so cramped you couldn't wave your magic wand to grant even such a simple wish, as to get out of this stupid damn lamp. So much for being the Grand Poobah Master of Wishes.

I wish I was a song on the wind.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MadStalker on May 31, 2014, 08:28:46 PM
Quote from: Catherine Sarah on March 06, 2014, 10:29:19 AM
I wish I was a song on the wind.

Wish granted! You are now an old, poorly written Marlyn Manson song being flopped about by a soulless hurricane.


I wish that I didnt suffer from so much insomnia.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on May 31, 2014, 09:57:12 PM
Wish granted, sleeping beauty. Unfortunately, your prince couldn't get his GPS to work and gave up.

I wish for this vile feeling to end.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 01, 2014, 12:22:26 AM
Quote from: LordKAT on May 31, 2014, 09:57:12 PM
Wish granted, sleeping beauty. Unfortunately, your prince couldn't get his GPS to work and gave up.

I wish for this vile feeling to end.
Granted. Now you'll never feel anything anymore.  :o
I wish for a giant muffin
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ReaverMarcus on June 01, 2014, 12:28:32 AM
Granted, but Derpy came and ate it.

I wish I was a pony.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 01, 2014, 12:37:12 AM
Granted. People became scared of you so you had to be locked away in the barn
I wish i could fly
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ReaverMarcus on June 01, 2014, 12:41:04 AM
Granted, but you ended up squished.

I wish my mama didn't have a cold.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 01, 2014, 01:08:03 AM
Granted, now she has a hot since she got transported into negative world. It also lacks color, but that is just a side effect.

I wish my mouse would behave. It has gone on a rampage and thinks for itself now.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ReaverMarcus on June 01, 2014, 01:11:59 AM
Granted, but it gets lost when you turn your back.

I wish I had money.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 01, 2014, 01:19:05 AM
Granted. Your being put on trial on accounts of robbing the national treasure bank
i wish i didnt have a migraine
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 01, 2014, 02:44:01 AM
Granted... You walk into a pole and knock yourself out, when you wake the migraine is gone but now you have a painful knot in your head

I wish whatever I wanted to eat would magically appear when I wanted it
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 01, 2014, 02:46:06 AM
Granted, but something got messed up and it keeps sending more than you asked for and soon your apartment and neighbors have to move top make room for it all.

I wish wishes came true.
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 01, 2014, 05:45:14 PM
Granted! Happy times! And then someone wishes for everything and everyone to turn into grilled cheese.

I wish i knew why this owl flying around my neighbourhood is screaming
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 01, 2014, 05:48:02 PM
Granted. Now you have a pack of wolves howling at the moon all night long and will attack you if you step outside
I wish my foot wasnt itching so much
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 01, 2014, 07:06:31 PM
Granted, you now have no foot.

I wish, I could find my bank card
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 01, 2014, 07:31:56 PM
Granted but when you do find it,it will have been used as a puppies chew toy.

I wish I had some ice cream for my pie.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Bombadil on June 01, 2014, 08:00:31 PM
Granted. But you get so much ice cream you can't even find your pie and it's oozing everywhere

I wish my house was warm
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 01, 2014, 08:10:39 PM
Granted but it is now a tent in the middle of the Sahara

I wish I could catch up on all the back log of work I have to do.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 01, 2014, 08:29:57 PM
Granted, but your boss increases your work load.

I Wish my teeth were healthier
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 02, 2014, 12:25:39 AM
Granted... Your teeth are so perfect that you are constantly hounded by people wanting to see them and you have no privacy

I wish more people understood my kinda wacky sense of humour
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 02, 2014, 12:53:00 AM
Granted.
Sadly your sense of humour became a world wide phenomena to the extent no further intelligent thought, work or actions were ever processed in the world. With everyone in the world totally incapacitated through constant laughter, the natural bush land and forests took over the world. Mankind then became extinct.

I wish Hershey's chocolate syrup plant would set up in Australia. 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 02, 2014, 12:58:26 AM
Granted. the factory blew up and caused everyone and everything to turn into inedible chocolate objects
wish my computer wasnt lagging
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 02, 2014, 02:12:39 AM
granted, but now it has no screen

I wish I didn't think too much
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 02, 2014, 02:32:05 AM
Granted now you don't think at all. (Don't fret thou you are now perfect for a career in politics)

I wish I was ruler of the universe
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 02, 2014, 02:50:44 AM
Granted, but this gives you a greater perspective on reality. You see that the universe itself is insignificant compared to all existences, and what you thought was everything that existed turned out to be just one grain of sand on the beach of realty. And what you thought was ultimate power turned out to be pretty pathetic in the new perspective.

I wish dr who was real.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 02, 2014, 03:10:02 AM
Granted.  While the White Guardian has the Dr. K9 and Romwna searching for for the key to time. The cybermen choose this time to visit Earth.  Prepare to be upgraded

I wish to have the power to control life and death
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 02, 2014, 04:10:22 AM
Granted, you mistakenly wish death upon your immortal self and cause time to stand still. 

I wish I knew what my work schedule was for today.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 02, 2014, 12:57:04 PM
Granted, but you miss the call to tell you no to bother turning up because ther has been an emergancey and the door will be locked.

I wish i had a job
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 02, 2014, 01:09:23 PM
Granted but it literally pays in peanuts and requires 90 hour workweeks.

I wish I had correct stamps to get all my bills paid.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 03, 2014, 06:51:12 AM
Granted. All your mail got sent to the wrong address on a different continent
I wish i didnt have to wake up so early today
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 03, 2014, 07:10:39 AM
Granted because gypsy caused time to stop.

I wish I knew what I was planning to do next. This timelessness is making things difficult.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 03, 2014, 07:23:40 AM
Nice coming back from an earlier post >:-). Granted. You remember it was conspiracy to overthrow the government. Now caught your in federal custody till the end of time.
I wish someone would bring me back to life
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 03, 2014, 07:31:13 AM
granted, but now time just keeps looping so you die and get back up, over, and over and over ....

I wish everything made sense.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 03, 2014, 08:07:57 AM
Granted. You lost all perceptions and senses of whats real and whats fake.
I wish my phone wouldnt die so often
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 03, 2014, 08:22:00 AM
Quote from: Grim Reaper Brianna Terryal on June 03, 2014, 08:07:57 AM
Granted. You lost all perceptions and senses of whats real and whats fake.
I wish my phone wouldnt die so often

that is more like the opposite of my wish.

granted, it dies permanently.

I wish to not wish any more.
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 04, 2014, 07:14:42 AM
Granted. But you become a stone.

I wish i could go to San Fransisco now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 04, 2014, 07:46:08 AM
Granted... You board a trolley that never stops to let anyone off but keeps loading more and more people on and are forced to constantly eat Rice A Roni

I wish I had a decent acoustic guitar 
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 04, 2014, 07:58:57 AM
Granted, but it gets stolen in less then a week.

I wish I had a horse
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 04, 2014, 08:02:30 AM
Granted you pick it up from the taxidermist tomorrow.

I wish I had coworkers that new what they where doing
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 04, 2014, 08:27:48 AM
Granted... They all quit and become strolling minstrels who perform on horseback and leave you alone to be the only one who knows what they are doing there

I wish my computer had a better ability to play online radio stations
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 04, 2014, 12:04:48 PM
Granted, bur you speakers fail, and you have to use head phones

I wish people didn't argue with other people for feeling the same as them about something :(
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 08, 2014, 03:11:42 PM
Granted.  Sadly that didn't stop the arguing at all. People then chose to argue with other people for feeling different from them about everything. Which worsened the situation to a degree everyone in the world spent more time arguing than eating. Needless to say mankind became extinct shortly after Maccas went broke from not selling burgers "do-you-want-fries-with-that.

I wish there was a bridge between Earth and Mars. I'd like a nice weekend away sometime.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 08, 2014, 03:13:51 PM
Granted, but the Martians end up being rather maleccntric and offer you the elevator to Venus.

I wish I could meet so many lovely people in person.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 08, 2014, 03:16:32 PM
Granted. those people turn out to be aliens who try to do weird experiments on you
i wish i could change my eye color
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 08, 2014, 03:18:45 PM
Granted. The whites of your eyes are now red.

I wish I could change my mood.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 08, 2014, 03:27:38 PM
Granted, but now it changes so often that bipolar doesn't even scratch the surface.

I wish my back didn't hurt.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 08, 2014, 03:32:36 PM
Granted but once you realize that your back no longer hurts,you jump up for joy and land on your ankle wrong,and it now needs to be in a cast for six weeks.

I wish all the outside work I have to do would be done for the year.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 08, 2014, 03:34:45 PM
Granted. A huge fire breaks out, burning everything to ashes
wish i didnt feel so heavy right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 08, 2014, 03:45:43 PM
Granted. Fortunately a truck bearing a load of helium stopped by and pumped you so full of helium you floated up through the stratosphere outbound towards space and beyond galaxies yet to be discovered, needless to say, you were never seen again.


I wish ther were no international time zones so I don't have to stay up all night talking to others in their day time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 08, 2014, 03:49:47 PM
Granted, but now that every gets up or not as they please, you never know when to call.

I wish for accurate wishes....
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 10, 2014, 10:53:05 PM
Granted. A pile of "Accurate" brand tires fall from the sky crushing you as they land. Each one has the word "wish" painted on the side.

I wish for a yummy ham sandwich on whole wheat with Swiss cheese please. And a glass of milk.
:D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 11, 2014, 12:56:13 AM
Granted. The thing you most love in the world is now a yummy ham sandwich on whole wheat with swiss cheese and a glass of milk.  Bon apatite

I wish I wasn't so tired right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 11, 2014, 01:04:28 AM
Granted. your going to be inflicted with terrible hallucinations because you are now a massive insomniac
I wish upon a star
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 11, 2014, 01:43:24 AM
Granted you are now the first person to wish upon a star. Scientists are not sure what was your demise the lack of atmosphere in space or the gas and radiation from the star. But congratulations you wished upon a star.

I wish my voice would return
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jo-is-amazing on June 11, 2014, 02:56:50 AM
Granted: but its the voice of Johnny Cash

I wish I was in a successful band
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 11, 2014, 04:03:27 AM
I'll walk the line

Granted but your the drummer.  Let all the jokes at your expense commence.

I wish I was back in Queensland right now
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jo-is-amazing on June 11, 2014, 04:12:10 AM
Granted: But you have to live in Woodridge.. and not the good part of Woodridge
The 'woodridge' part of Woodridge

I wish I lived in London
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 11, 2014, 04:43:38 AM
(Woodridge doesn't bother me. Living that close to Alexandra Hills and relatives I can't stand. My wish has been corrupted. Bravo)

Granted your new home is in the center of London covering 12 acres, while your room is 27m high. Welcome to the tower (yes you are stuck in your room)

I wish my brain was firing so I knew what to say when needed instead of playing games
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 11, 2014, 06:02:26 AM
Granted, you always know what to say,....245 hours too late.

I wish I could be paid and not have to work.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 11, 2014, 08:38:33 AM
Granted, you are now an old well, I which people throw coins.
I wish for everyone in the world to be happy.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jo-is-amazing on June 11, 2014, 08:51:36 AM
Granted: But how can happiness exist if there is no sadness?, emotions are relative, so in essence no one would feel anything,
YOUR WISH HAS STRIPPED HUMANITY OF ITS... humanity?

:o Shock Horror  :o

:P sorry about the hole relative thing, I couldn't resist

I wish I was secretary general of the United Nations*

*(Yes, I am a politics nerd :P)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Erik Ezrin on June 11, 2014, 09:46:51 AM
Granted, you are done with med school and still alive and happy, but you become such a workaholic you won't marry someone (and if you already have someone you'll lose him/her), nor have friends (you're always occupied with work), and are constantly sleep deprived. But you love your job, so at least you are happy! ;)

I wish I could do magic!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 11, 2014, 09:56:43 AM
Granted. you become overloaded with mana particles that you'll exploded after casting a spell
i wish i was swinging on trees
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ravensong on June 11, 2014, 09:58:09 AM
Granted: You are now a parapalegic monkey...

I wish I could transform into, and back from, a raven at will, keeping my own mind intact.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 11, 2014, 10:05:47 AM
Granted. you fly into a cave after one of your transformations and all my vampire bats swam and attack you
i wish i didnt wake up sweating from the heat
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Erik Ezrin on June 11, 2014, 10:07:36 AM
Granted, but now your body overheats and you die.

I wish there weren't so many stupid people!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Elanore joey on June 11, 2014, 10:27:08 AM
granted but you are now the stupidest person on earth

i wish i could be be with my best friend
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 11, 2014, 10:31:14 AM
Quote from: Elanore joey on June 11, 2014, 10:27:08 AM
granted but you are now the stupidest person on earth

i wish i could be be with my best friend
Granted, but your best friend is convicted of a felony and falsely names you as an accomplice. You're both given 25 to life and housed in the same cell.

I wish you a merry Christmas.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 11, 2014, 10:58:09 AM
Granted. a rain of fire comes from the sky and destroys the world on christmas
i wish my headphones could speak
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 11, 2014, 01:09:32 PM
Granted. But they speak nonsense in your ears all day and all night long, and you're now completely insane and obsessed with pineaples.

I wish i had seen a unicorn once.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 11, 2014, 02:32:21 PM
Granted, you saw a unicorn with madusa riding atop. You are now turned to stone.
I wish I was immortal and forever young.
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dee Marshall on June 11, 2014, 02:43:21 PM
Quote from: Kova V on June 11, 2014, 02:32:21 PM
Granted, you saw a unicorn with madusa riding atop. You are now turned to stone.
I wish I was immortal and forever young.
Granted. Until the universe dies you'll be six months old.

I wish I were in Dixie. (Hooray, hooray!)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 11, 2014, 02:59:09 PM
Granted but your wearing Union Blue

I wish for astronomical cosmic powers
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 11, 2014, 03:03:15 PM
granted. a black hole sucks you to an alternate dimension where there is unicorns and and animals singing the happy song
i wish i had mosr control over my lightning magic xD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 11, 2014, 07:35:51 PM
Granted. You not only have complete control over lightning but actually become lightning and are sucked into the nearest electric outlet where you become trapped in a rechargeable battery plugged into the wall in the other room.
I wish for a dish of squishy fish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 11, 2014, 09:02:30 PM
Granted but they turn out to be plastic squeeky toys.

I wish I was done with cleaning out my blackberry patch.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 11, 2014, 11:35:36 PM
Granted, all blackberry patches are now bare but you are covered with so many thorny scratches that you are bandaged head to toe and can't enjoy the summer outside.

I wish my fingers weren't dyslexic.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Codia on June 12, 2014, 08:09:54 AM
Granted, mind you now you're tyrirlby lecdysix yuersofl

I wish when I slept with a book under my pillow I'd remember the information absorbed throughout the night
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ravensong on June 12, 2014, 09:59:05 AM
Granted, but now you are blind and unable to read normally.

I wish I had my musical instruments with me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Marcel on June 12, 2014, 10:04:02 AM
Granted, but your instruments are broken.
I wish I could have the girl of my dreams.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Ravensong on June 12, 2014, 10:11:56 AM
Dang You!!!  Argh!!!!

So...Granted, only she can't stand you and loves your best friend.

I wish I could BE the girl of my dreams.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 12, 2014, 12:45:31 PM
Granted. You are the girl of your dreams in real life but you've fallen into a deep sleep and can never wake up again.  You are trapped in your own dreams!
*sings*
Oh I wish I were an Oscar Mayer wiener, that is what I'd really like to be, cause if I were an Oscar Mayer wiener, everyone would be in love with me!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: LordKAT on June 12, 2014, 10:14:48 PM
Granted, but you went the way of the hotdog and, well, face it, was covered in kraut and devoured.

I wish I mattered in ways that matter to me. Long story.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 23, 2014, 10:02:49 AM
Granted.

Sadly, on your way home from the office one late spring day; you were caught in the most strangest cosmic disruption ever seen or recorded. This spontaneous disruption caused all matter to become anti matter and subsequently, immediately disappeared without a trace, you included. You were never seen or heard of ever again.
So we'll never know if you lived happily ever after.

I wish I was a bright little dew drop on a warm summers day.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Serenahikaru on June 23, 2014, 06:21:39 PM
Wish granted, but you evaporate.
I wish I was one of those anime catgirls
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 24, 2014, 05:09:51 AM
Granted, but you can't stop dancing and singing 'Caramel Dansen'.
I wish my friends could know what i feel and that i didn't need to explain it to them
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 24, 2014, 05:22:02 AM
granted, now you feel nothing, and have nothing to explain, but they repeatedly ask, how can you feel nothing. and they get abgry when you keep asking what is feel?

I wish, I WENT shopping more
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on June 24, 2014, 06:12:43 AM
Granted. However no matter how many times you go shopping you always seem to come back with the same things:
A lefthanded screwdriver
Tin of checked paint
Bag of steam

I wish this cold wasn't going straight through my uniform
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 24, 2014, 07:58:57 AM
Granted . Now you're naked !
I wish there was no traffic on the roads when i drive
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on June 24, 2014, 04:03:15 PM
Granted... Everyone is afraid to be on the road when you drive

Wish I wasn't so darn tired
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on June 24, 2014, 06:30:33 PM
Granted, you sleep forever, you've never felt more rested.

I wish... I could Fly! XD
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 24, 2014, 06:41:48 PM
granted. you struck by a bolt of lightning and become paralyzed
i wish for a million more wishes
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on June 24, 2014, 08:46:51 PM
Granted,but there is a glitch in the million wishes,what you end up with is a Ground Hog day where you get to relive the same wish 1 million times.

I wish my body didn't hurt so much right now.

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: HoneyStrums on June 24, 2014, 10:17:50 PM
granted, it hurts so much more, every other Thursday for the rest of your life.

I wish, I knew everything but nothing.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on June 24, 2014, 10:23:12 PM
granted. your head explodes from to much knowledge and you turn into a zombie for knowing nothing and get your head cut off by a undead hunter
i wish that airplanes in the night sky were like shooting stars
Title: Re : Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ForceMustang on June 28, 2014, 06:24:58 AM
Granted! Every plane from now on burst into flame when flying in the skies. You now need 4 weeks of boat/horse-riding whenever you want to go somewhere. Because of that, all the economics markets collapse and it's apocalypse on Earth

I wish it wasn't so cloudy, cause today we march, cause today it's the LGBT Pride in Paris !
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on June 28, 2014, 10:29:11 AM
Granted! The cloud instantaneously condenses to rain and falls as one giant sheet of water killing thousands and dampening everyone's spirits :(

I wish that the next persons wish isn't corrupted
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on June 28, 2014, 11:27:32 AM
Granted. The next wish will not be corrupted...
I wish my wish is corrupted!
(its like one of those weird Möbius loop things!)

>:-) >:-) >:-)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Serenahikaru on June 30, 2014, 09:08:52 AM
Granted, but loop continues

I wish I never aged after I turned 21
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on June 30, 2014, 09:58:42 AM
Granted. Sadly the opposite ageing process kicked in with a vengeance causing you to grow younger by the minute. Within the hour you had regressed to the egg from which you came.

Sad, isn't it?

I wish I didn't win Powerball tonight.   ;D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on June 30, 2014, 01:21:08 PM
Granted, your game is cancelled after marsupials overrun the premises.

I wish that humanity had access to magic.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Serenahikaru on July 01, 2014, 08:11:18 PM
Granted, but its impossible to master.

I wish Pokemon were real
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on July 01, 2014, 08:42:47 PM
Quote from: Serenahikaru on July 01, 2014, 08:11:18 PM
Granted, but its impossible to master.

I wish Pokemon were real
granted. a charizard flew in and torched you with flamethrower
i was i had a fountain of juice
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on July 01, 2014, 10:32:57 PM
Granted. You suddenly remember a past life when you "had" a fountain of juice. 

I wish for only everything good to happen for everyone ever. ^_^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Umiko on July 01, 2014, 10:36:43 PM
Quote from: Kova V on July 01, 2014, 10:32:57 PM
Granted. You suddenly remember a past life when you "had" a fountain of juice. 

I wish for only everything good to happen for everyone ever. ^_^
granted. now your stuck with all the misfortunes and unhappiness of the world
i wish my hair would hit that 3rd inch already so i can get my extensions
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Two Bodies/Same Soul on July 02, 2014, 06:45:53 PM
Granted. Though it applied only to nose hairs. Specification people!

I wish I lived in tamriel.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on July 02, 2014, 10:01:38 PM
Granted. You now live in the stomach of a giant space whale who's name is tamrial.

I wish up was down, left was right, in was out and cats and dogs are bestys. ^_^
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: AnnaCannibal on July 05, 2014, 07:57:46 PM
Quote from: Kova V on July 02, 2014, 10:01:38 PM
Granted. You now live in the stomach of a giant space whale who's name is tamrial.

I wish up was down, left was right, in was out and cats and dogs are bestys. ^_^

Granted!  Because of the sudden universal shift in physics, everything collapses in on itself and the cats and dogs were only bestys for a micro second before being crunched into oblivion. 

I wish I could befriend a giant snail!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on July 06, 2014, 11:41:58 AM
Granted.
Sadly before you could get down to the serious business of developing a life long relationship, the snail was whisked away by feral hunters looking for truffles, who mistook the snail for one. It was even sadder to hear unfortunately due to a cruel twist of fate, you had been caught up in the snails tail. You apparently were unable to free yourself and ended up in a sleezy dive French restaurant on the west side and eaten by a destitute woman later identified on the late news as Lady Elizabeth Gurtrude Willamena Frogmore the 4th.

I wish I was Cinderalla, post ball.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on July 06, 2014, 01:10:53 PM
Granted, your bones lie in a grave marked Cinderella. Time is a fickle mistress.

I wish that the weather was less predictable :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on July 06, 2014, 01:52:49 PM
Granted you now live in Victoria Australia.  A place where if you don't like the weather you just wait five minutes and it changes.  Of course down here pretty much every animal is either poisonous or deadly in some manner. Good luck surviving a week.

I wish someone could find those missing episodes of doctor who
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dee Marshall on July 06, 2014, 01:57:40 PM
Quote from: immortal gypsy on July 06, 2014, 01:52:49 PM
Granted you now live in Victoria Australia.  A place where if you don't like the weather you just wait five minutes and it changes.  Of course down here pretty much every animal is either poisonous or deadly in some manner. Good luck surviving a week.

I wish someone could find those missing episodes of doctor who
Granted, in fact you find them yourself. Unfortunately, they were stolen by the Daleks because they gave away too much info and now they have you, too.

I wish I could go home now.
Title: Re: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: AnnaCannibal on July 06, 2014, 02:22:49 PM
Quote from: Dee Walker on July 06, 2014, 01:57:40 PM
Granted, in fact you find them yourself. Unfortunately, they were stolen by the Daleks because they gave away too much info and now they have you, too.

I wish I could go home now.

Granted.  You are instantly transported home NOW.  You are also stuck in now and forever remain in the same position, the same time and must eternally view the moment of now.  The fridge forever makes the same noise, a fly is stuck mid air right in front of your face, and the same horrible stench of a dead mouse you will smell.

I wish I had a house in the woods.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Emmaline on July 21, 2014, 07:02:12 PM
Granted.  You had a house in the woods.  You no longer do.

I wish my cat could talk.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on July 21, 2014, 08:06:26 PM
Granted, it took you a while to teach her but after eighteen months you have finally gotten your cat to talk. Now enjoy spending the next eighteen years getting her to be quiet and listen to what you say.

I wish, I wish, I wish I knew what to wish for
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jera on July 24, 2014, 05:51:18 PM
Granted, and now this is the only thing you know. Good luck remembering how to count!

I wish I had the power to end all wars.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Eris on July 24, 2014, 07:15:33 PM
Granted, the next word you speak will cause a shockwave which will level cities, shatter mountains, and scour all life from the face of the earth.

I wish that the existence or non existence of god/s was definitively proven one way or the other.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Fox in Socks on July 24, 2014, 08:54:21 PM
Quote from: Falconer on July 24, 2014, 07:15:33 PM
Granted, the next word you speak will cause a shockwave which will level cities, shatter mountains, and scour all life from the face of the earth.

I wish that the existence or non existence of god/s was definitively proven one way or the other.

Granted, but we find out that the known universe is actually just his attic and that we're just a project he forgot about billions of years ago.

I wish I had a magical journal or diary that I could use to communicate with long-dead famous people in their own time.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: AvaCadaver on August 10, 2014, 03:49:56 PM
Quote from: Fox in Socks on July 24, 2014, 08:54:21 PM
Granted, but we find out that the known universe is actually just his attic and that we're just a project he forgot about billions of years ago.

I wish I had a magical journal or diary that I could use to communicate with long-dead famous people in their own time.
Granted, but they have nothing to say.

I wish I could teleport without science manipulating my physical form every time I change location
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: FTMKyle on August 13, 2014, 05:15:34 PM
Granted, but now you can only teleport to other planets, and you never find your way back to earth.

I wish my mom were sane.
Title: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: EvanAidan on August 19, 2014, 10:40:34 PM
Granted. But now your the crazy one, and everyone around you is now sane.

I wish my employees had a brain and could do their jobs!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Gothic Dandy on September 08, 2014, 01:56:32 AM
Granted. Your employees now share one giant, collective brain stored in a glass container in your plain sight which allows them to perform their jobs more efficiently.

I wish I made money with one of my creative projects!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on September 25, 2014, 07:59:34 PM
Quote from: Gothic Dandy Luca on September 08, 2014, 01:56:32 AM
Granted. Your employees now share one giant, collective brain stored in a glass container in your plain sight which allows them to perform their jobs more efficiently.

I wish I made money with one of my creative projects!
Granted, you make three cents more per creative project you undertake. Unfortunately economic inflation makes everything  more expensive by four cents.

I wish I wasn't always depressed.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Miss_Bungle1991 on September 25, 2014, 08:06:55 PM
Granted.

You are now so happy and chipper at all times that you annoy everyone around you.

I wish, I wish I didn't kill that fish.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on September 25, 2014, 08:57:08 PM
Granted but now nobody knows anything about Portia Porcupine

I wish I didn't have to go into the city to pick up medication today

(I have actually quoted that episode on someone's wedding day)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Chris R. on September 26, 2014, 01:07:27 AM
Granted, medication doesn't exist anymore

I wish I didn't have to look for motivation
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on November 05, 2014, 11:23:42 AM
Granted, now you're on the go so much you're looking for a nap.

I wish I had a magic wand.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: m1anderson on November 05, 2014, 11:49:51 AM
Granted, the only downside is your magic wand is an appendage like Pinocchio's nose in lieu of your middle finger on your strong hand.

I wish my body was the same as Jane Fonda's in the 1968 classic, Barbarella.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MelissaAnn on November 05, 2014, 12:00:09 PM
I wish my body was the same as Jane Fonda is in the 1968 classic, Barbarella.

Granted, but you're paralyzed and can't move it.

I wish I had smaller hands.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on November 05, 2014, 12:11:57 PM
Quote from: m1anderson on November 05, 2014, 11:49:51 AM
Granted, the only downside is your magic wand is an appendage like Pinocchio's nose in lieu of your middle finger on your strong hand.

I wish my body was the same as Jane Fonda's in the 1968 classic, Barbarella.

I'm a Boston driver, you're probably underestimating what I can get done with that middle finger!

Quote from: MelissaAnn on November 05, 2014, 12:00:09 PM
I wish my body was the same as Jane Fonda is in the 1968 classic, Barbarella.

Granted, but you're paralyzed and can't move it.

I wish I had smaller hands.

Granted, but you won a turn in the Cash Grab Booth......and could only snatch two bucks.

I wish I was drowning in chocolate.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on November 05, 2014, 07:12:43 PM
Granted. You are drowning in a river of chocolate but soon an underwater, or rather underchocolate, pipe sucks you up, past the chocolate lake, next to the chocolate waterfall and into the marshmallow room where you'll be made into marshmallows in five seconds. Soon you'll be drowning again in lots of little cups of hot-chocolate as fluffy white marshmallows dissolving away into a sweet sugary goo.

I wish I was a young immortal robotic space alien six-armed flying amazonian woman from a future where animals talk and vegetables walk and we all sing scarey-happy songs all the time forever.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: gabimoneratt on November 05, 2014, 08:05:53 PM
Granted.  But you can't move any of your six arms and can only fly in circles, very small ones btw. The vegetables grow huge and take over the entire Galaxy. Oh,  and now they feed off of any living creature. So you end up getting stuck inside a massive cauliflower and get eaten forever since you're immortal. (pretty smart cauliflower if you ask me... Infinite food sonds pretty interesting lol)
Quite a torture... Being eaten by cauliflower while you're all singing scarey-happy songs for eternity. I'm  sorry :/ hahaha

I wish I could eat everything I wanted without getting fat or having health issues  :P
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on November 06, 2014, 01:27:24 PM
Granted. Unfortunately now all you feel like eating is beans, lentils and cabbage. No health issues but still a small gas problem that is keeping people away from you.

I wish I could go outside in the daylight without having to wear my sunglasses to see
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MelissaAnn on November 06, 2014, 03:24:53 PM
Quote from: immortal gypsy on November 06, 2014, 01:27:24 PM
Granted. Unfortunately now all you feel like eating is beans, lentils and cabbage. No health issues but still a small gas problem that is keeping people away from you.

I wish I could go outside in the daylight without having to wear my sunglasses to see

Granted, unfortunately you are a vampire cannot step into daylight.

I wish I had a full head of hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: gabimoneratt on November 06, 2014, 03:55:53 PM
Quote from: MelissaAnn on November 06, 2014, 03:24:53 PM
Granted, unfortunately you are a vampire cannot step into daylight.

I wish I had a full head of hair.
Granted, but now your whole head is just hair :(

I wish I could actually cook well.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amato on November 08, 2014, 11:30:53 PM
Granted, but now you work for Chef Ramsey.

I wish I never had to drive to get where I needed to be.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on November 09, 2014, 03:47:36 PM
Granted, and the lawn needs mowing again.

I wish it wasn't getting dark so early.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on November 11, 2014, 05:36:25 PM
Granted But now the sun shines 24/7/265 days a week so you can no longer fall asleep.

I wish it was snowing.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Tessa James on November 12, 2014, 10:25:15 AM
OMG so this is your fault!  Your wish was apparently granted but now people are freezing and cursing their stuck cars and looking for shovels.  Skiers and snowboarders, however, love you.

I wish dreams didn't fade so easily in the morning.  There are some almost real sensations I'd like to savor.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 12:28:19 PM
Granted,  but now you only have nightmares and you can't forget them... You start to lose sense of what's real and what is not and get paranoid thinking that there's a huge monster running behind you all day, everyday.  :-\

I wish i was a bit shorter so I could wear heels without looking like the statue of liberty haha
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MelissaAnn on November 12, 2014, 12:36:27 PM
Quote from: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 12:28:19 PM
I wish i was a bit shorter so I could wear heels without looking like the statue of liberty haha


Granted, But now your feet are way to large for your size body and you look like you have clown feet...!

I wish I could smell the roses...!
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: m1anderson on November 12, 2014, 02:26:31 PM
Granted, but the roses smell like a Portillo's Maxwell Street Polish.

I wish I had no facial or body hair.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on November 12, 2014, 06:01:42 PM
Granted but now you are also bald.

I wish I could get a good nights sleep
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on November 12, 2014, 06:38:07 PM
Granted  you get your good nights sleep and don't wake up for ten years

I wish it wasn't so bright outside
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SarahM777 on November 12, 2014, 06:40:29 PM
Granted But now you find you are always walking around the dark.

I wish I had a blueberry pie
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 07:47:09 PM
Granted, but the blueberries used were all rotten :(

I wish I had natural straight hair...
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Amato on November 12, 2014, 08:00:38 PM
Quote from: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 07:47:09 PM
Granted, but the blueberries used were all rotten :(

I wish I had natural straight hair...

Granted, but now people wont stop touching it without your permission, cause they can't believe such awesome hair is real.

I wish I had an endless supply of sketchbooks and art pencils.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 08:11:31 PM
Quote from: AnonBear on November 12, 2014, 08:00:38 PM
I wish I had an endless supply of sketchbooks and art pencils.

Granted.  But now you have way too many sketchbooks and art pencils and they keep coming in. They have taken over your house and backyard, and you can't even get in your house anymore :(

I wish I could fly
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: immortal gypsy on November 12, 2014, 08:23:25 PM
Quote from: SarahM777 on November 12, 2014, 06:40:29 PM
Granted But now you find you are always walking around the dark.

I wish I had a blueberry pie
Fine by me I generally see better in the dark


Quote from: gabimoneratt on November 12, 2014, 08:11:31 PM
Granted.  But now you have way too many sketchbooks and art pencils and they keep coming in. They have taken over your house and backyard, and you can't even get in your house anymore :(

I wish I could fly
Granted but now you can never land and must remain at least ten feet above the ground.

I wish I was better organized
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: JamiePhsx42 on October 14, 2015, 09:34:49 PM
Granted but now you've become an office drone.

I wish that pigs could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ChiGirl on October 14, 2015, 09:43:26 PM
Granted, but now they ALL do.  All the time. And they're everywhere. Pig poop falling from the sky at any given moment. 

I wish my dog would stop barking at 4am.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: traci_k on October 15, 2015, 08:23:28 AM
Granted: Your dog now sleeps all night being too tired from barking at folks from Westboro Baptist Church protesting outside your home all day.

I wish I lived in Hawaii.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Matthew on October 15, 2015, 08:27:29 AM
Granted: You've immediately moved to Hawaii, but seeing as it was with no notice, none of your belongings are with you. Good luck  ;)


I wish for an endless supply of sushi
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: traci_k on October 15, 2015, 08:38:49 AM
Granted: but they're all made from an endless supply of blowfish and therefore deadly poisonous.

I wish I had some clothes to wear in Hawaii
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rachel89 on October 16, 2015, 03:02:13 AM
Granted, but its from the luggage of someone who was visiting Alaska.

I want laser hair removal.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: ChiGirl on October 16, 2015, 04:02:59 PM
Granted, but they use the laser Dr.  No used to try and kill James Bond.

I wish I could turn invisible.

Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk

Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Kova V on October 16, 2015, 04:14:16 PM
Granted but while you're invisible to others in the outside world, everyone is invisible to you.

I wish I could meet new friends!! :D
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Jera on October 17, 2015, 12:06:06 AM
Granted, but you believe when they tell you not to be alarmed that nobody else can see or hear them.

I wish that renting an apartment wasn't so expensive.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on October 17, 2015, 10:15:44 AM
Granted. The next apartment you rented, the landlord paid you. Just as well, because the tissue paper walls would always get wet when it rained.

I wish traveling to the States wasn't sooooooo long (26 hours)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Matthew on October 21, 2015, 08:14:18 AM
Granted: it's no longer 26 hours, but now it's 52 hours

I wish that I wasn't sat in a history exam right now  ::)
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on October 21, 2015, 10:51:53 AM
Granted. The chairs are gone and now you're standing in a history exam.

I wish it were lunchtime.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Rejennyrated on October 21, 2015, 11:01:01 AM
Granted it is now lunchtime but an army of cats has invaded your canteen and stolen all the food.

I wish I could lose about 15 kilos of weight and be 30 years younger.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sebby Michelango on October 21, 2015, 11:10:56 AM
Quote from: Rejennyrated on October 21, 2015, 11:01:01 AM
Granted it is now lunchtime but an army of cats has invaded your canteen and stolen all the food.

I wish I could lose about 15 kilos of weight and be 30 years younger.

Granted. You would lose 15 KG and be 30 years younger. But you would be so small, no clothes in the world would fit you. ;)

I wish I could get all my guy parts that I was supposed to have - Become a cis-guy
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: KyleEdric on October 21, 2015, 12:35:39 PM
Quote from: Sebby Michelango on October 21, 2015, 11:10:56 AM
I wish I could get all my guy parts that I was supposed to have - Become a cis-guy

Granted! Your pecs are now on your back, penis on your ankle and, naturally, balls under your armpit; just like a cis guy!

I wish I could write a best selling novel.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: soaringPhoenix on October 21, 2015, 12:42:50 PM
Wish granted! But your novel is about a topic that you are against, and a lot of bad people read it. It gets banned in your country.

I wish my mum could lose some weight so she can live with me longer.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rachel89 on October 21, 2015, 01:10:49 PM
Granted, but unfortunately, someones escaped pet tiger has now gained weight...
I wish I had a job.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: KyleEdric on October 21, 2015, 06:03:39 PM
Granted. The pay is superb, but it's as Donald Trump's personal butt kisser.

I wish my cough would go away, already.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 21, 2015, 06:22:54 PM
Granted, your cough goes away but so does your voice never to return and all you can do is grunt and point and you go mad and are institutionalized


I wish I felt like my life still had purpose and reason
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Devlyn on October 21, 2015, 06:59:36 PM
Big hug! Granted. Your life has more purpose and reason than most of us could wish for. I mean that.

I wish I had a subscription to the Ice Cream of The Month club.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rachel89 on October 21, 2015, 07:12:33 PM
Granted, but the flavors for the year are asparugus, pepper, sardine, tripe, brussel sprout, dirt, vomit, cough syrup, dog breath, machine oil, rotten egg, and paste.

I wish to go back to 1985.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Dee Marshall on October 21, 2015, 07:55:07 PM
Granted. But 1984 WAS like "1984". Hope you like Victory Gin.

I want to move where it's warm and sunny and there's no snow.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: rachel89 on October 21, 2015, 08:21:54 PM
Granted, but you are now living in Somalia.
I wish for a kitten.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SilverWing on October 21, 2015, 08:25:21 PM
Granted. However, this is a saber-toothed tiger kitten. You'd best keep on your toes.

I wish for a hat.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: soaringPhoenix on October 21, 2015, 08:29:17 PM
Granted, but your hat has a huge drawing of a penis on it... And you can never take it off.

I wish I had all the gaming stuff I wanted.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SilverWing on October 21, 2015, 08:43:09 PM
Granted, but everything there is a Decepticon.

I wish for a phone with unlimited memory.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MsMouse on October 21, 2015, 08:44:37 PM
Granted, but it records all your calls and posts everything on the Internet.

I wish for my own personal TARDIS.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: topit on October 21, 2015, 09:55:52 PM
granted but its in a portapotty instead of like a phone booth or whatevr it is in that tv show

also it smells bad

i wish i could breathe underwater yo
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 21, 2015, 10:26:16 PM
Granted, but the only place you can do that is in Davy Jones' locker among the other unfortunate crustaceans of ill fated sailors   

I wish my chicken dinner could cook itself ready at the time which I desire
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: MsMouse on October 21, 2015, 11:03:19 PM
Granted, but dinner tonight is "Chicken Sashimi"

I wish my car would stop leaking oil.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Laurie K on October 22, 2015, 12:34:09 AM
granted you ran your car outa oil....


I wish I could have a nice pair of breasts
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Daniel92 on October 22, 2015, 07:00:40 AM
granted, but they're blue :D

I wish I could fast forward to March
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SilverWing on October 22, 2015, 08:29:22 AM
Granted, but you miss the alien invasion in February and have no idea what's going on.

I wish I had a clone sister.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Matthew on October 22, 2015, 08:37:17 AM
Granted - you have a (robot) clone sister - however being a robot she s far superior to mere mortals and overthrows the human race.


I wish I had some food to eat
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Catherine Sarah on October 22, 2015, 08:57:40 AM
Quote from: Matthew on October 21, 2015, 08:14:18 AM
Granted: it's no longer 26 hours, but now it's 52 hours

Just by way of interruption Matthew, I attempted to book via Etihad Sydney-JFK. They have it up to 38 hours 14 minutes. (Insanity gone totally mad) That's with a meager 5 hour stop over in Dubai. Looks like I'm back to United. Where is this bloody time machine, Back To The Future promised.

Granted. You now have soooooo much food to eat, not only do you attempt to consume it all and bombed out once you reached 782 lb, but the excess started to rot, giving off excessive amounts of methane gas that exploded and you were decimated because you weren't able to move.

I wish I had a cent for every < insert appropriate value > [Winners will be announced in the Philadelphia Daily News Sat Nov 14 pg1]


Catherine
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: Sebby Michelango on October 22, 2015, 01:04:48 PM
Quote from: Matthew on October 22, 2015, 08:37:17 AM
Granted - you have a (robot) clone sister - however being a robot she s far superior to mere mortals and overthrows the human race.


I wish I had some food to eat

Granted. Your next meal is a rotten raw snake. You have to eat it, before you can choice to eat normal meals again.

I wish I could fly.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SilverWing on October 22, 2015, 01:50:34 PM
Granted. However, you are now a registered aircraft and have to file flight plans and carry a transponder beacon, black box, and a radio to communicate with air traffic control.

I wish the pair of panties I bought today actually fit me.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: KyleEdric on October 22, 2015, 02:07:47 PM
Granted. They fit, but they become riddled with holes after two wears.

I wish I could eat bacon again.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: soaringPhoenix on October 22, 2015, 06:22:16 PM
Granted, you can eat bacon again, but it's the only thing you can eat, forever.

I wish I had a bunny rabbit.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: SilverWing on October 22, 2015, 07:42:19 PM
Granted. However, this bunny rabbit is ten feet tall, has chainsaws for teeth, and eats humans. You'd better be careful.

I wish one of the Nascar cars had the transgender pride flags and symbols all over it.
Title: Re: Corrupt-A-Wish
Post by: V M on October 24, 2015, 02:53:54 AM
Hi friends  ;D

Time for a new one  8)  Please visit Corrupt-A-Wish 2.0 (https://www.susans.org/forums/index.php/topic,198103.msg1761405.html#msg1761405)

Hugs

V M