Susan's Place Transgender Resources

I whento pick up some papers for my wife from her friend. My wife had told her friend that I was transgendered at first it up set me, but I felt better knowing that it was I one less person that I had to tell. I drove over to the public librery where she was making copies of something for my wife. It was eating at me that she knew that I was trans yet had never said anything to me. I said, can I ask you a question? She said, yes. I asked her what did my wife say to her? You mean about you going to Houston to find a theripist for your transgender issues. I found myself talking about things that I think was helping her understand me better. I lot of the questions were the same stuff that I have heard before. Do I like men? AM I  confused about who I am? What sex do I want to be? She was affraid that she was going hurt my feelings by saying the wrong thing. She wanted to talk more but was in a hurry to get home and said that if I needed to talk let her know. It felt good to talk to some one.

Oh, that's cool. I've noticed a lot of people don't say anything because they're nervous about saying the wrong thing and don't want to hurt your feelings. That's what a lot of my friends are like.

Usually, though, I feel awkward talking about it. For some reason, I tend to feel like it's something I'm not supposed to talk about. I'm pretty open about it if somebody asks about it, but I feel awkward bringing it up. I try not talking about it, honestly. But I guess, in the end, we all have to do what makes us feel better, right?

It seems to me that it is good to have someone other than a therapist or your SO that you can trust to talk to about how you feel. My boyfriend has a very supportive female friend who is there for him if ever he needs someone to talk things over with. It's great for him because sometimes he doesn't know quite how to phrase his feelings, and she doesn't judge him for that. She is a neutral party, and he doesn't have to schedule time to talk to her. :)

Yea I would find that quite relieving for someone else to share with. My wife is fairly supportive w/me and sometimes I do feel she has mentioned it to her sister. For whatever reasons, I really am ok with who she may tell. My wife is a very smart lady and would handle things well. I do start an on-line session with my therapist next week. I am looking foward to that. However, I do want to do a face to face visit asap. I want my therapist to not just be that, but also a gender guide as well. But yea, someone else to know, I would be ok.

Quote from: Devyn on October 30, 2010, 09:35:55 PMUsually, though, I feel awkward talking about it. For some reason, I tend to feel like it's something I'm not supposed to talk about.

Ditto here.  I'm finally out to my whole immediate family (wife and kids), and the thing I want most is to get over the feeling that I have to sneak around or feel like a criminal if I need to wash a wig and set it out to dry, or hang my clothes in the closet, or deal with my body hair.  I want to get to where I can do what I need to do without having to feel like I'm making anyone uncomfortable, and that's the main thing for me right now - I feel like I'm supposed to be careful not to upset them.  Hopefully we'll have a good family talk tonight and be able to get past that...