Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Hi everyone.

I've always wanted FFS and I've been saving hard, but the older I get, the less point there seems. Older faces do not seem to benefit much, even when someone like Dr Ousterhout does the surgery. I transitioned when I was 27 (56 now) and although I don't seem to frighten the horses, I'm pretty much invisible to everyone. I thought that if I maybe got rid of the remaining male facial features it might help, but I'm less and less sure of that now. Almost everyone here seems to be in their 20s and get superb FFS results. It's very depressing. In consultations in the UK, both Dr O and Dr Z said they could help me, but then they would, wouldn't they?

Does anyone have any advice?

Sarah-Jane.

I'm older also, but can't really help much as I haven't gone through it.  I am also in the search though.  You're statements confused me.  You say that you are "invisible yet want to get rid of remaining male features as it might help".  If you are passing already, is the intent of the procedure to be pretty? or are you having trouble passing?  I am much more interested in ffs than in having grs.  Dr. O requires more money than what I wish to part with and hope that a few "modest" procedures can tip the scales and make passing a real possibility. 

Hi Cindy.

Well there's a difference between being invisible and passing (though I do seem to pass). What woman wants to be invisible?

You know it's strange; I'm not pretty (far from it) but I don't often have passing problems even though I'm in a job where I'm constantly giving presentations to large groups of people. I sort of think my confidence allows me to pass even though my face is against me. (After all there are some quite ugly women out there, but they're still regarded as women). The thing is, I don't want to be a confident ugly woman with no passing problems; I'd rather be a confident attractive woman with no passing problems. I'm just worried it may not be possible at the age of 56.

Sarah-Jane.

Well, I'm with you there.  I would hate to be ugly, because that can attract as much attention as being pretty.  I am married for life so attracting a mate is less important for me.  I just want to be able to go about my day, make a living as a woman.  Damn, when you look at what is available, you could spend a kings ransom.  If you then amortize it over, let's say 20 years, then you have to set limits.  If I was 24 and was going to amortize it over 50 years, you could justify Dr.O's prices.  That would be assuming I had that kind of money at 24, which I didn't.  As far as results, we have some people here in hollywood that still look great, though a bit windswept, in their 70's.  Look at Joan Rivers at 77.

If you have the funds it works but if your poor and doing it well i can surely think of better things to buy. The money i spent made me almost totally broke then i gave away the last 20k opening up trans homes for girls who didn't get FFS or guyz or girlz who would be homeless and i am much happier with the money i spent helping others than spending it on myself. If i had that money i could buy another piece of property to help trans peeps with a nice safe home but my 20k just went into helping others who owned homes and well there is now only the palatine NY home left and i heard they may lose that one due to their fighting to not pay taxes calling their unknown religion non taxable.

Hey i am looking for a partner out here in the country on my farm and were almost the exact same age and well we could help some people and finish this place and well many of the amish women have lots of facial hair and are stronger than any city man.

PS: If you are rich make sure you plan to get the facelift etc because getting the bones reduced will give you major saggy skin afterwards

Hi there, I am almost 53, will be this Sat. I feel I pass too, but I still want FFS. Doing a search about it reveals it can happen and help at all ages....

I say do what makes you happy. There is no guarantee that you are going to like the outcome no matter what your age, FFS and other surgery's aren't a cure all. If you feel like it is something you want, and something that has the potential to make you happy than there is no reason to be hesitant. :)

My mum is 60 and she said that becoming invisible in her 50's after always being attractive was one of the hardest things that she has had to come to terms with and it's clear that she still gets upset by it, so I don't think that it's just a trans woman thing. If a bit of a spruce up is what you feel is needed and you have the cash, then why not? :)

Quote from: Cindy Stephens on January 05, 2011, 11:28:26 AM
As far as results, we have some people here in hollywood that still look great, though a bit windswept, in their 70's.  Look at Joan Rivers at 77.

Money, yes I know what you mean. To get everything done is a major mortgage.

The woman who amazes me is Debbie Harry, I mean have you seen now she's gone from hot to granny to hot? I want to know who her surgeon is!

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi208.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fbb60%2FSouthsideGar%2F0109_debbie_harry.jpg&hash=64fe371f211a1b69871850cbe113d827a3dd0e4d)

Debbie Harry is pure class.

Blondie, "Heart Of Glass" (live) Glastonbury 1999 (HQ) (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQ2YQ4Bo2ts#)

In Thailand I met a very lovely 64 year old Canadian trans woman who had just had FFS. She was having some minor nerve complications, but otherwise everything had gone very well.

I am 57 and I am thinking of maybe just a face life, but not the whole thing.

Older we get the more FFS dependent for good results we get. Young ones can do their hrt and resulting halt of bone growth and feminizing effects  make them instantaneous female( almost instantaneous ). 40s and 50s are a FFS must unless absolutely feminine to begin with. Go for it, I am sure you will be very beautiful, and Dr. Osterhout is a master at what he does and hopefully will do it for some time to come, I will be ready for him in about couple years but know that he is getting to that retirement age though.

Sarah I think if you want to get it done it's worth it, you're worth it :)

Hi Sarah-Jane - I was in the same position as you. transitioned in my 20's but got to my 50's and decided that even though I passed no problem, I too was invisible and I wanted to look pretty once again. So I let Dr Zukowski loose on my face, and I have to say, it's been a revelation. My FFS was 2 years ago and I'm truely delighted, with the skill of the man. Naturally it's tough right afterwards but I knew what to expect so wasn't alarmed when I looked like I'd been in a car crash. 2 Years down the line, all scars have gone, all swelling has gone, and my looks are more feminine than before and I look much younger. The op cost about $25000 which was well worth it.
Not everyone is happy to be just invisible - I wasn't.

Any bone reduction will mean a facelift though, so would be expensive, but you're worth it.  :)

I wouldn't mind being invisible.  :)

Quote from: Sarah-Jane Lambert on January 05, 2011, 09:55:11 AM
Hi everyone.

I've always wanted FFS and I've been saving hard, but the older I get, the less point there seems. Older faces do not seem to benefit much, even when someone like Dr Ousterhout does the surgery. I transitioned when I was 27 (56 now) and although I don't seem to frighten the horses, I'm pretty much invisible to everyone. I thought that if I maybe got rid of the remaining male facial features it might help, but I'm less and less sure of that now. Almost everyone here seems to be in their 20s and get superb FFS results. It's very depressing. In consultations in the UK, both Dr O and Dr Z said they could help me, but then they would, wouldn't they?

Does anyone have any advice?

Sarah-Jane.

Sara-Jane:

I am a proud "Z" girl.  And I had my FFS/BA when I was  56.  I too thought that I may be too old to really make a difference.  But I can assure you that it easily took ten years off my face.  I feel I am attractive now.  What do you think?

(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Flh3.ggpht.com%2F_g_6DN1ifQPs%2FTSVjZ_RCzaI%2FAAAAAAAAACc%2FesbhSqJXf-0%2FSandyPhoto.jpg&hash=bbdf83b120d5b1fb246e7c0f9f21c6bdef20b9db)

Naturally, I have a soft spot in my heart for Dr Z, but any of the world renowned doctors that we all know will give you a significant improvement. If you have another consultation with the doctors, ask very specific questions about what they recommend and what effect the change will have.  Naturally this isn't something to be taken lightly, and it will hurt a lot.  But the results, in my opinion, are worth it.  To this day I cannot pass any reflective surface without sneaking a peak at myself.  I feel much better about myself.  And that may be the whole point.

-Sandy

Every time I see FFS I read it as For ->-bleeped-<-s Sake.  :icon_redface:

Quote from: JohnR on January 06, 2011, 03:59:09 AM
Every time I see FFS I read it as For ->-bleeped-<-s Sake.  :icon_redface:

Well thanks John, that's pretty damn helpful. I wouldn't expect a man to understand the problems of a woman stuck with a man's face anyhow. F2M faces masculinise really well with hormones. The reverse is often more difficult. Everyone (all women) who replied so far have been really constructive. Until you. What makes you think anything you've said is relevant?

Sarah.

:police: Calm down everyone. It was obviously supposed to be a joke, even if it was one in rather poor taste. Now, lets not over react here.

Rule 15 of TOS states

15. Items under discussion shall be confined to the subject matter at hand, members shall avoid taking the other users posts personally, and/or posting anything that can reasonably be construed as a personal attack.

I agree it may have been in poor taste but I think all JohnR was trying to do was lighten the tone, and I'm sure he may wish to apologise if the comment has upset you.

Right lets get back on topic people please. Thank you  :police:

Quote from: Sarah-Jane Lambert on January 06, 2011, 08:36:23 AM
Well thanks John, that's pretty damn helpful. I wouldn't expect a man to understand the problems of a woman stuck with a man's face anyhow. F2M faces masculinise really well with hormones. The reverse is often more difficult. Everyone (all women) who replied so far have been really constructive. Until you. What makes you think anything you've said is relevant?

Sarah.

Sarah and all the other ladies at Susan's, I really am sorry to have upset any of you. It was never my intention to cause offence or for my post to look as though I was in any way making light of the issue.

I had intended my post to be self deprecating, showing up my own ignorance on the matter, rather than cause any of you, for even one second, to feel anything less than the ladies that you are.

Sometimes abbreviations can mean different things, as in the case of FFS.

I would never make light of a serious issue for any of you, I'm sorry.

Hey Sarah,
I signed up for the Yahoo ffs group.  Seems to be some good info there as well on various procedures. Seems like various motivations and expectations are all over the place.  It is good to get a broad spectrum of people responding. 

Quote from: Cindy Stephens on January 06, 2011, 09:49:09 AM
Hey Sarah,
I signed up for the Yahoo ffs group.  Seems to be some good info there as well on various procedures. Seems like various motivations and expectations are all over the place.  It is good to get a broad spectrum of people responding.

I agree Cindy, I posted a similar query over there and people have been really kind in replying with lots of helpful opinions and information. I didn't really think anyone would be interested in the difficulties older women experience. Places like Youtube have many inspirational stories, but they're nearly all from young women. More at home with the technology I suppose.

Best wishes,

Sarah.

Indeed Johnnie, I though it twas funny, but then again I've a thing for the darkside, unless it too up-close and personal.....lol

Yep I hope there's a point to it or else I'm just about to blow a load of my savings on a waste-o-time...

Which I doubt!! As my surgeon is a Professor of Surgery otta Harvard Medical School and Chief of Craniofacial Surgery at Massachusetts General Hospital...

On the 25th I'll be having ffs and face nip-n-tuck....with him in fact. 8hrs plus I'm told...

So will let you all know how I get on out there in Boston....

And back to pain, grin and bear it time....

BTW I'm 52 going on too grow old disgracefully..... an all that.....  :P

I didn't take any offence either, John.  And actually I thought it was kind of a snicker myself.

STP, FFS, BA, SRS, GRS, GCS, GRS, PCOS, AA, TG, TS, TV, CD, FTM, MTF, HRT, AIS, LGBTQQA, and all the rest.

It is such an alphabet soup that we have to deal with. 

When I go over to the boys boards, I can sometimes be bewildered about some of the terms you guys use as well.

-Sandy