Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: Illusionary weapons on March 03, 2011, 10:40:22 PM Return to Full Version
Title: The many ways of defeat: Love, and only that postpones
Post by: Illusionary weapons on March 03, 2011, 10:40:22 PM
Post by: Illusionary weapons on March 03, 2011, 10:40:22 PM
I'm in a complete minority but I think this forum is for another kind of trannsexual to ones like me, though there's going to be similarities it's also going to cause miscommunication.
When I was 8 or 9 years old from that moment of complete realisation reading at reading that newspaper article, seeing that picture of a man who transformed into a woman, I knew that was who I was and I denied it, why? Because of the complete loyalty and love of my mum.
So I would ask people to not think they love someone less by being true to themself, you're actually not loving that person you don't want to hurt by not being true and open.
I'm 'lucky' in that I've never wanted a high-falutin career happy to sing at weddings and at small venues, I've fallen in love with women but never willing to have a child, and having children and raising them to be fantastic human beings is the greatest thing anyone can ever do and something that would fufill me completely.
This is has all gotten incredibly complicated because I'm sexually attracted to men, every thought in that regard is a man and a woman. But I can only ever think of falling in love with other women. I think this is classic female thought, get pregnant and the man moves on.
Typing here actually clarrifies though, but I am thinking how did you majority of older people have careers and children while forced into a male role? Society can go do a ->-bleeped-<-ing jump would I compomise that much.
Anyway only love defeated me, and that was only a postponement.
When I was 8 or 9 years old from that moment of complete realisation reading at reading that newspaper article, seeing that picture of a man who transformed into a woman, I knew that was who I was and I denied it, why? Because of the complete loyalty and love of my mum.
So I would ask people to not think they love someone less by being true to themself, you're actually not loving that person you don't want to hurt by not being true and open.
I'm 'lucky' in that I've never wanted a high-falutin career happy to sing at weddings and at small venues, I've fallen in love with women but never willing to have a child, and having children and raising them to be fantastic human beings is the greatest thing anyone can ever do and something that would fufill me completely.
This is has all gotten incredibly complicated because I'm sexually attracted to men, every thought in that regard is a man and a woman. But I can only ever think of falling in love with other women. I think this is classic female thought, get pregnant and the man moves on.
Typing here actually clarrifies though, but I am thinking how did you majority of older people have careers and children while forced into a male role? Society can go do a ->-bleeped-<-ing jump would I compomise that much.
Anyway only love defeated me, and that was only a postponement.
Title: Re: The many ways of defeat: Love, and only that postpones
Post by: Janet_Girl on March 03, 2011, 11:09:00 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on March 03, 2011, 11:09:00 PM
I have been married three time, and I have four children, three boys and a girl. I began transition two years ago, at 54. I wish sometimes I had don't it 20 years ago. But no sense crying over spilled milk.
I am happy now, except for the fact I still need SRS. But that is the end of my transition. Oh and I do have a girlfriend who knows my past. It does not bother in the least bit. She has BTDT.
I am happy now, except for the fact I still need SRS. But that is the end of my transition. Oh and I do have a girlfriend who knows my past. It does not bother in the least bit. She has BTDT.
Title: Re: The many ways of defeat: Love, and only that postpones
Post by: japple on March 04, 2011, 12:32:47 AM
Post by: japple on March 04, 2011, 12:32:47 AM
Life happens while you are busy making plans.
I am also attracted to men and women and have fallen in love with both. Anyone I've dated knew I was trans. I have an amazing and perfect career and a child and one on the way.
Society didn't force me into a male role...I did. I went bald in high school, 5'11", broad shoulders. I tried to live as a women at 20 and did not pass at all. I don't think I'll ever pass...but will begin HRT and some sort of balance soon.
I am also attracted to men and women and have fallen in love with both. Anyone I've dated knew I was trans. I have an amazing and perfect career and a child and one on the way.
Society didn't force me into a male role...I did. I went bald in high school, 5'11", broad shoulders. I tried to live as a women at 20 and did not pass at all. I don't think I'll ever pass...but will begin HRT and some sort of balance soon.
Title: Re: The many ways of defeat: Love, and only that postpones
Post by: Illusionary weapons on March 04, 2011, 11:34:09 AM
Post by: Illusionary weapons on March 04, 2011, 11:34:09 AM
Janet you don't look 54 at all, I thought mid forties at most :) And yes spilt milk, I'm thinking sometimes it has to happen I'd certainly not be the whinging fool I am today otherwise :)
Japple what career are you in? I'm not complaining to be honest as I do love my work immensely. My academic career is still there too, several lecturers expected good things from me, transsexuality gives us a unique perspective on the world. It's just now again the realisation of exactly who I am at a fundamental level is filling me with confusion but I've never experienced moments of joy like it.
Japple what career are you in? I'm not complaining to be honest as I do love my work immensely. My academic career is still there too, several lecturers expected good things from me, transsexuality gives us a unique perspective on the world. It's just now again the realisation of exactly who I am at a fundamental level is filling me with confusion but I've never experienced moments of joy like it.
Title: Re: The many ways of defeat: Love, and only that postpones
Post by: japple on March 05, 2011, 01:16:05 AM
Post by: japple on March 05, 2011, 01:16:05 AM
Quote from: Safiyah on March 04, 2011, 11:34:09 AM
Japple what career are you in?
I own a creative firm. We do design and other things for TV, Film, and interactive. I get to travel, meet celebs, speak to colleges and conferences, and work on creative stuff all day.