Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Ryno on March 24, 2011, 09:22:38 PM Return to Full Version
Title: Family-related rant...
Post by: Ryno on March 24, 2011, 09:22:38 PM
Post by: Ryno on March 24, 2011, 09:22:38 PM
Since my aunt and dad became aware of my transition, they seem to be trying to "control" the situation. I completely understand any advice and whatnot they may have when it comes to my education, finances, jobs, where I live, etc. But this is territory they know nothing about. They barely understood (although supported) my sexuality when I came out as attracted to women. So for them to step in and tell me I "need" to do this or I "need" to do that, is completely out of place and it's pissing me off.
my relationship with my aunt has always been amazing. She's awesome, I love her. But this is hurting that relationship. She has a huge personality that barely allows anyone to get a word in edge-wise in a conversation. When I try to answer a question or explain something she interrupts and tells me what I should be doing.
She just contacted me on Facebook saying we need to talk, after I made a post about seeing my endo. I have a very strong feeling she is going to tell me I "need" to wait or should not go on hormones. She's going to go on and on about all the negative effects and the permanence of this decision, assuming I know nothing of any of it and won't even hear me when I say "I FKING KNOW."
This is my decision, my life, and unfortunately, along with my dad, she feels she has a part to play in when I make my decisions and how they're made. I'm twenty. I'm a legal adult who's carving my own path through MY OWN life.
I'm really scared how much strain this transition is going to put on my family relationships. I know there's absolutely no relationship in life that you can take for granted. I can't expect anyone to be there by my side forever and always. All I can do is appreciate those who do and let go of those who don't.
I kind of just wish sometimes I can set my family aside for a while, put them on pause or something, or just move the ->-bleeped-<- away for a few years and come back fully ME and not have them barging in on my decisions. In the end, it's none of their god damn business.
my relationship with my aunt has always been amazing. She's awesome, I love her. But this is hurting that relationship. She has a huge personality that barely allows anyone to get a word in edge-wise in a conversation. When I try to answer a question or explain something she interrupts and tells me what I should be doing.
She just contacted me on Facebook saying we need to talk, after I made a post about seeing my endo. I have a very strong feeling she is going to tell me I "need" to wait or should not go on hormones. She's going to go on and on about all the negative effects and the permanence of this decision, assuming I know nothing of any of it and won't even hear me when I say "I FKING KNOW."
This is my decision, my life, and unfortunately, along with my dad, she feels she has a part to play in when I make my decisions and how they're made. I'm twenty. I'm a legal adult who's carving my own path through MY OWN life.
I'm really scared how much strain this transition is going to put on my family relationships. I know there's absolutely no relationship in life that you can take for granted. I can't expect anyone to be there by my side forever and always. All I can do is appreciate those who do and let go of those who don't.
I kind of just wish sometimes I can set my family aside for a while, put them on pause or something, or just move the ->-bleeped-<- away for a few years and come back fully ME and not have them barging in on my decisions. In the end, it's none of their god damn business.
Title: Re: Family-related rant...
Post by: PandaValentine on March 25, 2011, 08:38:02 AM
Post by: PandaValentine on March 25, 2011, 08:38:02 AM
Despite what you're feeling maybe you should ask your aunt if she wants to be more involved? Like if she'd like to come with you. I know you weren't asking for advice, just felt I'd share anyway.
Anyways good luck with all that, I never really had the 'control' issue in my family as my mom really just let me do whatever, but then it took a year just to get an appointment with my endo because of all the problems in my prior attempts with psychologists. Hopefully time, will help heal this relationship, I know what its like to watch people I once deeply cared for slip away.
Hope the appointment with your endocrinologist goes well too!
Anyways good luck with all that, I never really had the 'control' issue in my family as my mom really just let me do whatever, but then it took a year just to get an appointment with my endo because of all the problems in my prior attempts with psychologists. Hopefully time, will help heal this relationship, I know what its like to watch people I once deeply cared for slip away.
Hope the appointment with your endocrinologist goes well too!