Susan's Place Transgender Resources

This is turning into a weird week - ever since I was more "out" at Exeter Pride last weekend, and after seeing the psychiatrist for the first time, my sense of how I want my body to be is getting much stronger, and I've been finding myself more and more uncomfortable being covered with body hair (I'm a pretty furry semite at the moment).

So I've just ordered a Braun epilator (that you can use in water). This will be a long, slow, and wince-some process, but I really need it to happen, and want to be in control of it - and I bet it'll work out cheaper than all the waxing I'd need otherwise. I'll let you know how it goes :o.

Hi yoxi,

You may find getting a wax first, helps. Instead of pulling out large areas of 'male' hair with an epilator.

I found epiltors to be torture. I prefer having my upper lip zapped than the pain of using an epilator on my legs.  By waxing you could then start to epilate with shorter, but not too short hair. I think one of the problems I had was that the hair was so long it curved around the  pulling out bit and you get several whammies for each time the hair is pulled. You don't need professional waxing get a friend or some friends and have a waxing party. Really good way of bonding :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Hugs

Cindy

Cindy is right about hair length, if the hair is more than about 1/8th of an inch it starts to get painful.
I used an electric clipper with a No.1 guard. 
First time is painful, second not too bad as the hair grows back at different rates.  I now use mine weekly and it is not bad at all.
Karen.

Oh yes, I'm abosolutely going to use my industrial-strength beard-trimmer all over first :). The word on the street is that these "use them wet" epilators are less painful, and better at pulling stuff out since the skin is warm and relaxed (and its owner is less tense!). We'll see. I may have to hold a discrete waxing party for my hard-to-reach parts...

Hi Yoxi, I was just thinking about all my body hair and how I can take care of it, so thank you for posting this.
What is an epilator?
If you pull the hair out will it grow back?
if I wax my arm hair does that mean it will grow back even more and more if I keep waxing or shavint my arm hair.

Hay Yoxi I am sorry for kinda hijacking your post so wadaya say you all come over here to Hawaii for a waxing party:)
Hay thanks "girls" or in Hawaiian Mahalo nui loa "Wahine"
Aloha.

Jennie

Hi Jennie,

I love Hawaii.

Since I'm almost hair free except in a few unfortunate spots can I reply? Sorry Yoxi, not stealing your thread. An epilator is a little bit like an electric razor except it has  either a rotating wheel or something similar that grabs the hair and pulls it out. The hair does grow back but after a number of applications it is much finer. Waxing is similar in that a cloth covers warm wax that you have spread across hairy skin, tearing the cloth off pulls the hairs out. Again the grow back but again with repetitive treatments there is less hair. Laser destroys the hair follicle and will permanently or for a long time remove tha hair. Again you need to have a number of treatment, and it only works on dark pigmented hair. I have a virtually hairless face now and it has taken 5 (I think) treatments. Electrolysis is putting a very fine needle into the hair follicle and passing an electric charge through it that destroys the hair follicle. It is usually regarded as the 'gold standard' for hair removal. Of course it takes a long time to do and often people use it to 'clean up' hair they cannot get rid of by other methods. You can also shave but the hair grows back quite quickly, depending upon you hormonal status etc. And there are hair removal creams such as Veet. All hair removal tends to work for longer if you are on anti androgens to kill testosterone production. T makes you hairy >:(. Which of course the guys tend to like and the girls don't  :laugh:
Many girls say they get a lot less hair growth after HRT,  they may not bother about getting their legs and arms treated until they see the effect. Facial hair is largely untouched by HRT, unless you can get it pre-pubescent.

Electrolysis, laser, waxing and epilation can be painful from the mild to the tears. Depending upon your pain threshold, the part of the body and where you are in your hormonal cycle. Prices also change dramatically from salon to salon. Go somewhere you feel comfortable and can relate to the technicians.


Laser and electrolysis has to be done in a studio by trained technicians. Some parts of your body you can wax your self but again most go to a studio, you cannot wax your own back :laugh:. Some areas are more sensitive to treatments than others and you should not use hair removal creams on your face or bottom. They are caustic and can burn you so you should do a test patch first..

Happy hair free times
I'm in Australia so Hawaii is special because the Waikiki sand is shipped in from Australia, which I find hilarious. 
Hugs & Aloha

Cindy

's okay, I feel neither hijacked nor hijilled :). I've been away on a singing weekend, and am recovering today (not much sleep!) so I'm only just getting to my browser.

I'd love to join you for a depilation party, but Hawaii is 7300 miles from me, so I'd need to start rowing now. There's no painless way to remove hair. If you can't afford laser/electrolysis, the wax/epilator options are cheaper but non-permanent - but they do reduce the hair and make it grow back finer meanwhile. I went for an epilator because I'm pretty damn furry, and I figured it would cost less in the end than the wax mountain I'd need in order to achieve the same effect (and probably take less time too, what with all the faffing around with wax and heaters and strips of cloth and and...) - it's an investment in smooth :).

and ofc hrt and good AA take their toll on body hair prior to srs for most us

i was fortunate enough to loose almost all mine and what little i epilate , i really enjoy that though ive grown to embrace it  >:-)

Quote from: yoxi on April 13, 2011, 06:09:32 PM
my sense of how I want my body to be is getting much stronger, and I've been finding myself more and more uncomfortable being covered with body hair (I'm a pretty furry semite at the moment).

The same thing happened to me. I never did like wearing the fur suit but after I started coming to terms with myself I couldn't take it any longer.

Like Cindy had mentioned if you wax or shave first, the hairs grow back at different rates so you're not pulling out as many with one pass and I doesn't hurt as bad. I can barely feel it when I do my arm and leg below the knees, guess I'm lucky that way.

Please do let us know how it works for you and if you figure out any good tricks.

Folk here were quite right, going straight into the epilator from scratch is bloody agony! I trimmed all my hair first, but maybe I shouldn't have started on my chest, which is quite sensitive.

Anyway, I'm just going for shaving for the moment, and maybe Veet or something like, and then I'll try the epilator again once the hairs have got more used to being messed with.

Quote from: yoxi on April 19, 2011, 06:57:43 AM
Folk here were quite right, going straight into the epilator from scratch is bloody agony! I trimmed all my hair first, but maybe I shouldn't have started on my chest, which is quite sensitive.

Anyway, I'm just going for shaving for the moment, and maybe Veet or something like, and then I'll try the epilator again once the hairs have got more used to being messed with.

I've tried the chemicals- veet and nair- and I don't have the patience for them (nor did they really work). After six weeks on AA's and a week on estrogen, I've noticed my hair growth isn't so aggressive. I don't think I'll be able to avoid the laser. For now it's the razor.

Also, the AA's seem to have an effect on my head hair. I was freaking out as I started to notice more of my hair falling out than I usually notice- what I think is happening is a thinning of my incredibly thick curl.

I'm going to minor hijill your thread: When do you think you'll start HRT, friend?

As soon as the guy who gets to say I can, says I can :).

Seriously, this is building in me in great waves now. I think I said this elsewhere already, but when I first visited this forum, I wasn't really able to empathise with other people's stories about their dysphoria. But in the last couple of weeks, especially since I saw the psychiatrist and therapist (and felt like they and I were taking me seriously), the sense of discomfort and urgency is building up in me.

I feel like I've woken up in the wrong body.

I'm not overwhelmed by this (yet), but it is stirring me up a lot, and when I see the psychiatrist again next month, I'm going to need to talk to him about time-scale and whether he's willing to recommend HRT yet.

Quote from: yoxi on April 20, 2011, 02:21:24 PM
As soon as the guy who gets to say I can, says I can :).

Seriously, this is building in me in great waves now. I think I said this elsewhere already, but when I first visited this forum, I wasn't really able to empathise with other people's stories about their dysphoria. But in the last couple of weeks, especially since I saw the psychiatrist and therapist (and felt like they and I were taking me seriously), the sense of discomfort and urgency is building up in me.

I feel like I've woken up in the wrong body.

I'm not overwhelmed by this (yet), but it is stirring me up a lot, and when I see the psychiatrist again next month, I'm going to need to talk to him about time-scale and whether he's willing to recommend HRT yet.

You'll probably get a mental reset as soon as you start estrogen- you'll be vaulted right back into your dysphoria being weirdly unique, to muted. This will probably confuse your therapist, it shifts gears and you become dysphoric on different levels, gradually. I can feel it happening as I type.

My mental state is "weird" too, and even though it was similar to some other stories here, I still felt like I was having trouble trying to relate, as you were. Don't worry, as we go through this we can both be misfits, if you like :) I've followed your story with great interest. If you find yourself coming up against a threshold, don't be afraid to PM me, I get messages at all times no matter where I am (smart phones are so awesome).

Thanks - my therapist worked at Charing Cross in the 70's, so she's probably not so easily confused :). I'm grateful for the offer, you may well hear from me - if only to rave about Ursula Le Guin :D.

We'll see - I used it on 2 spots, and it felt like I imagine a tazer feels, and immediately made the area red and blotchy and sore as hell. Maybe one I've endured some waxing...

Try taking some pain relief half an hour before you need to defur.

Yoxi posted:

Seriously, this is building in me in great waves now. I think I said this elsewhere already, but when I first visited this forum, I wasn't really able to empathise with other people's stories about their dysphoria. But in the last couple of weeks, especially since I saw the psychiatrist and therapist (and felt like they and I were taking me seriously), the sense of discomfort and urgency is building up in me.

I feel like I've woken up in the wrong body.

I'm not overwhelmed by this (yet), but it is stirring me up a lot, and when I see the psychiatrist again next month, I'm going to need to talk to him about time-scale and whether he's willing to recommend HRT yet.

Welcome my sister. :icon_bunch: :icon_bunch:

I saw/felt it in your early posts. Possibly why I felt safe to to pm you :laugh: :-* :-* :-* (not that I have many fears :laugh:)

Love and Hugs and I wish you a safe journey. You will never walk it alone as long as you are with your sisters.

Love Pandam

Cindy

Quote from: JohnR on April 22, 2011, 04:39:51 AM
Try taking some pain relief half an hour before you need to defur.

Yeah, I'm thinking gin & berry smoothie :). I'm not a drinking gal in general, but I have some great organic gin on the premises for medicinal purposes (no, really - I was having to self-catheterise for a while and it really helps!) and it's great with smoothie - plus you can kid yourself that it's healthy ::).

Quote from: CindyJames on April 22, 2011, 04:52:04 AMWelcome my sister. :icon_bunch: :icon_bunch:

I saw/felt it in your early posts. Possibly why I felt safe to to pm you :laugh: :-* :-* :-* (not that I have many fears :laugh:)

Love and Hugs and I wish you a safe journey. You will never walk it alone as long as you are with your sisters.

Thanks Cindy, I'm enjoying the ride, but it's kind of fast and twisty at the moment :o. And I don't think I've ever felt this motivated about anything!

After removing the worst with some cold strip waxing, I've just used the epilator for the first time. Bearable except on my tummy, where I'm very sensitive so it's pretty grim. Effective, though, and seemingly less brutal than the waxing was. I'm such a delicate flower!

It's an amazing feeling having smooth skin, though - and colder when it's cold, cooler when it's hot, a fair trade. It's so strange what turns out to be important. Now I want someone to touch me! (after all, it is spring...)

I always remember the first time of shaving my legs. I felt so nice, sensations I had never had, coursed through me. Can't explain it as it was a very physical rather than mental sensation. Now a days its just routine. Just another thing you do in the shower. Part of being me.

How is the new house? I saw the response over the problems in getting furniture in, that sounds nutty :laugh:.

Have you a job in the new area? Sorry maybe I should pm but I'm cooking a pie and responding and doing several things.

Hugs

Cindy

I'm getting more into using the epilator now that I've done some waxing - I can do my legs and arms, and tonight I did my belly, but the chest is still very painful as I'm very sensitive there. And the Brazilian region will take quite a run up too! Worth it though, it seems to upset my skin a lot less than the cold wax does. I have to put the stereo on loud when I'm using it, because I'm self-conscious about the neighbours hearing it!

Oh and a couple of very persistent builders managed to get my loom around the staircase dogleg with minimum impact on the paintwork, so now all my weaving gear is ready to roll, huzzah!

Just ordered an epilator myself, I don't know if it has been reviewed here (epilady sport - which got good reviews elsewhere), but I will put it to work on the arms and legs mostly.

Soon, my polywonderful friend, we shall enjoy the same delicious pain!

"It Gets Better" ;D

Maybe I'm just a sooky lala but I can't handle epilating more than my legs. :o I tried honest.  :'(

Karen.

Doing my belly was the hardest - and I haven't even got to my chest yet, which is going to be no fun at all. Hence the awaiting gin smoothie - for medicinal purposes. I'll have to wait a while to see if my new fella is into helping me wax my back (I don't think I'd ever let anyone else loose on me with an epilator!)

It does get easier each time, as there are less hairs to be yanked. I think when I did my belly, I broke a lot of hairs because I was pussyfooting, so there'll be more to keep doing there.

Meanwhile, I have my first electrolysis session this Wednesday (should have been last week, but I had a heavy cold, and didn't fancy sneezing in the middle of a follicle burn). We've done a deal on having hour-long sessions, but I'll have to see how often I can tolerate it, and how long it takes my face to recover from each session. I wish this didn't matter so much, but it really does, I have to get it done. HRT/AA really can't happen soon enough.

I got my back waxed yesterday in a salon I was amazed by how little pain their was. My laser on the face was agony, but no choice. But using an epilator, I tried, Oh no, way to much.

Haven't caught up with the new boyfriend, gossip please.

Cindy

"New boyfriend" is a bit pre-emptive, but definitely going to happen :). We're waving our diaries at each other from afar at the moment, trying to plan a more 'intimate' meeting. He lives an hour's drive away from me. It's probably going to be frustrating to begin with, not getting to spend time together too often.

Sounds wonderful.

You lucky girl, you know what guys are like he'll be around in seconds for a home cooked meal >:-)

Hugs

Cindy

Haha! Yep, the way to a man's heart begins with his belly :)

Well that works for me, because a (slim) man's belly is pretty much my favourite part of him >:-).

Well, me vs. epilator round one:

I got both forearms done, they both feel sunburnt! Stuck through it though, my s.o. Felt my arms arms and wants to use it now! They are unique torture devices, but if you just do it, the payoff is very nice :)

let us know if electro is similar!

I had my first electrolysis session yesterday, an hour, plus another laser zap to my top lip and sideburns. I took a couple of codeine tablets beforehand, which helped a lot, but it really wasn't that painful, it mostly just felt like tweezing hairs, apart from a few that were more painful than that because they were right over a nerve. But I'm beginning to realise just how long this is going to take - looking in the mirror after an hour of this I couldn't see any difference at all :(. Hey ho.

I tried epilating my chest, but it was too painful, so I'm sticking with cold wax at the moment, which is pretty effective now that I've done it twice and there are less hairs to pull. It's still quite sore for a couple of days afterwards (as are my arms after epilation - they look spotty and blotchy for a few days before recovering). It's such a relief to be smooth, though.

I have been using VEET then epilating, and going over the area every few days to get the new growth, once it is all plucked out I can go to once a week and it isn't that bad but, the pain level can be through the roof the first time on some areas.

The easiest place for me was my lower legs, but going above the knees was a definite increase in pain level. The chest though, that is a hard area to deal with, I still haven't figured out what to do about the pain there.

Quote from: Padma on June 16, 2011, 02:41:29 AM
I had my first electrolysis session yesterday, an hour, plus another laser zap to my top lip and sideburns. I took a couple of codeine tablets beforehand, which helped a lot, but it really wasn't that painful, it mostly just felt like tweezing hairs, apart from a few that were more painful than that because they were right over a nerve. But I'm beginning to realise just how long this is going to take - looking in the mirror after an hour of this I couldn't see any difference at all :(. Hey ho.

I tried epilating my chest, but it was too painful, so I'm sticking with cold wax at the moment, which is pretty effective now that I've done it twice and there are less hairs to pull. It's still quite sore for a couple of days afterwards (as are my arms after epilation - they look spotty and blotchy for a few days before recovering). It's such a relief to be smooth, though.

Have you noticed any difference at all with the laser? I know it can take multiple visits... No way I'm using the epilator on anything other than my arms and legs!

Quote from: Adele on June 16, 2011, 03:02:29 AM
I'm kinda nervous to try the epilator on my arms. Everywhere else is fine, but then again, everywhere else is covered up, too. I usually wind up with red spots and ugliness after epilating, and I really don't want to be flashing that stuff around on my arms for days afterwards. :/

After waking up today I only see a slight redness and have some sensitivity on my arms. It was painful, very painful, worse than getting a tattoo. I will go over it again in about three days (sunday), and hopefully once a week or so thereafter.

Quote from: EmmaM on June 16, 2011, 10:05:13 AM
Have you noticed any difference at all with the laser? I know it can take multiple visits... No way I'm using the epilator on anything other than my arms and legs!

Yes, but since I'd only had 2 sessions before, the dark hair at different stages of cycle has now come up. I had a couple of
months where I didn't seem to have any dark hair on my upper lip any more, but now it's dark again and just been zapped.

I'm pleasantly surprised - the electrolysist gave me the impression my face would be very sore and read after the session, but it's barely noticeable today. PRominsing!

Hi Padma

We seem to be on a similar timeline at the moment, so I read your posts with interest! I started with laser on my face, as I figured this was the one area where shaving just wasn't going to cut it, it you'll pardon the pun.

Before starting laser, I looked like desperate dan a few hours after shaving, and was never clean shaven regardless of what I tried. Laser has been really effective for me, my photo was taken not long after my second session, and I had
my 4th one yesterday. What it has done is shown how much grey is in my facial hair, mainly on my chin and neck, so electrolysis is the next stop for me.

I also have an epilator, and can just about get away with it on my arms, lower legs and front of my thighs, but the back of my thighs is torture, and I managed about 4 seconds around my bikini line... :-/ Hopefully HRT will thin out some of my
body hair...

One thing I would recommend for those who are struggling to afford laser is using Groupon/KGB/Livingsocial or similar sites. I am also now having my chest and underarms lasered (as I couldnt bear the pain of epilating there!), and the 6 sessions cost £120 in total! In the London listings, Laser or IPL comes up at least
once a week, and you just have to be choosy about the provider you pick.



The things we do for beauty!

Yeah, Groupon etc. are thinner on the ground out here in the sticks, and it all seems to be golf rounds and makeovers. Keeping an eye out for lasers :).

Im not in London, but close enough to take advantage without it being a massive chore getting there and back.

I think it is now about 6 weeks since my last laser and no signs of dark hair. Some light blond stuff that is easily got rid of.  I think I had seven sessions in total. Chest and tummy are also totally free.

I'm Happy, and has made a big change in confidence and presentation.

Cindy

I'm thinking about asking the place I'm going to how much a torso laser would cost. I know I should just wait for HRT, but it's harder to bear the hair than I thought it was going to be. Weird how this has crept up on me.

For me, It was so much quicker and no pain at all. They use the same power laser but it sucks the skin into the head in about 5 cm areas (?) I didn't have the same sensitivity on the torsos as my face.
Nipples were sensitive but she used the high power spot laser around the areolae, and was careful not to hit the nipple. Bikini line was sort of fun.
We were both nervous, she had done it on 'females. including XXX laser (which sounds like you need a very steady hand :embarrassed:), but was a little worried about the junk. Neither of us could vocalise the concern. No matter how
we accept each accepted other
I was still a man with breasts and junk or a woman with junk and breasts (and don't anyone dare pick upon that comment, even though I'm no longer a Mod I will slam you :-*). It is a situation that we all reach,
we talked about doing the junk if they were cleaned shaved, and they are, but she was reluctant. I willingly accepted her concerns.  She also said she had only ever worked on 'woman' in that area. I totally accepted, and respected it.

People are people, that why I love them

Padma, do make sure you moisturise and sunscreen if going out after laser. I sort of did and got very told off because she picked skin damage from the 'odd' half day I didn't. Naughty girl :embarrassed: :embarrassed:

Cindy

I just had my second electrolysis session, and for some reason neither of us could fathom, it was a lot more painful this time round. Same areas of face, same painkillers(!) - the only thing that was different was that my stubble was a lot shorter this time. I found myself wondering whether the facial nerves got sensitised by the previous session, or maybe it was just that today's hairs were all "difficult" ones compared to last time. Still pretty bearable, but my face is red and a bit welted this time, which it wasn't last time. On with the witchhazel!!

I also used icepacks.

I also found pain varied from session to session with no logical reason. My tech did say it could be hormonal, as women coming into their period get more pain sensations.

I also think it is psychological, I was so happy to start I could bear it, the last few were painful and I had less hair!

I have to go back for an upper lip again.

Oh Well

Cindy

It won't stop me going back - I just need to neck my codeine a bit longer before the session starts, I think :). As for hormones, mine are all my own work at the moment, so I've only myself to blame. I'm still wondering about the sensitised nerves thing, because the pain reminded me of when I got my chest tattoo (don't ask) and about halfway through the two hours it took to ink in, it suddenly got a lot more painful - the tattooist said yes, the nerves will kick themselves up a notch sometimes to draw attention to damage being done!

I just tried out this Veet facial hair remover creme for women that a friend told me about - I suspected it wouldn't cut the mustard on bloke hair, and I was right, it didn't even make a dent on my upper lip hair. Roll on, HRT ::). I'm going to see my private psychiatrist in 10 days' time, he hinted that he might be up for recommending me for HRT by then, now that I've had time to settle in my new home and all that (it'll be our 3rd session, and 3 months since the first one). Fingers crossed.

Hope you get the HRT.
I was told that the anti-AAs are really good in preventing regrowth. I've been told to never use Veet or similar products on the face. Most of these contain sodium hydroxide (check the label), if you get sodium hydroxide (NaOH is the chemical name) in the eyes, you are blind just about instantly. No way back.

Hows the loom work going?

Cindy

don't bother trying to kill facial or body hair with T in your body although the fact that I was 19 at the time might have impacted it it just regenerates too quickly... it regenerates alot even with HRT.