Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Post operative life => Topic started by: Vallin on May 21, 2011, 05:35:33 AM Return to Full Version
Title: Romance post-op
Post by: Vallin on May 21, 2011, 05:35:33 AM
Post by: Vallin on May 21, 2011, 05:35:33 AM
I'm a (mostly) cis-male trans-admirer. I haven't seen this question in this forum yet, so: Assuming you dated men ("heterosexually") pre-SRS, have your preferences for men (particularly your physical preferences) and your preferred type of relationship changed post-op? I'm especially interested in hearing from those of you over a year post-op.
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: rejennyrated on May 21, 2011, 06:01:06 AM
Post by: rejennyrated on May 21, 2011, 06:01:06 AM
Well of course they did. For a start I wouldn't date any male who would have classed themselves as a trans admirer, because I no longer considered myself to be trans.
For a second thing I never liked anal, but postop that translated into I would literally KILL the first person who tried to go there!
Finally, I had always been at least notionally bisexual, but I found that postop I became more attracted to women than had previously been the case. I also tend to like very smooth sophisticated men (think Pierce Brosnan, David Tennant or maybe Jonathan Frakes). The slightest whiff of Alpha-male will make me run a mile because I am the Alpha myself and I don't appreciate the competition.
For a second thing I never liked anal, but postop that translated into I would literally KILL the first person who tried to go there!
Finally, I had always been at least notionally bisexual, but I found that postop I became more attracted to women than had previously been the case. I also tend to like very smooth sophisticated men (think Pierce Brosnan, David Tennant or maybe Jonathan Frakes). The slightest whiff of Alpha-male will make me run a mile because I am the Alpha myself and I don't appreciate the competition.
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: juliemac on May 21, 2011, 07:26:10 AM
Post by: juliemac on May 21, 2011, 07:26:10 AM
Quote from: rejennyrated on May 21, 2011, 06:01:06 AMWow. What she said. ALMOST to the letter.
Well of course they did. For a start I wouldn't date any male who would have classed themselves as a trans admirer, because I no longer considered myself to be trans.
For a second thing I never liked anal, but postop that translated into I would literally KILL the first person who tried to go there!
Finally, I had always been at least notionally bisexual, but I found that postop I became more attracted to women than had previously been the case. I also tend to like very smooth sophisticated men (think Pierce Brosnan, David Tennant or maybe Jonathan Frakes). The slightest whiff of Alpha-male will make me run a mile because I am the Alpha myself and I don't appreciate the competition.
I just like men more and Patrick Stewart than Frakes :)
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: ToriJo on May 21, 2011, 11:55:23 PM
Post by: ToriJo on May 21, 2011, 11:55:23 PM
As a cis-male, my opinion should not count for much in this as I don't have the experience of others.
But I'd suspect that having a body that matched your gender would increase a person's self-confidence and, thus, impact attraction in all the ways that self-confidence does for cis-women. Confident women - just like confident men - are more selective (not necessarily in a physical sense), among other things.
I'd also suspect that most people identify as female - whether cis- or not, pre- or post-op, etc, would probably not be attracted to someone who saw them as either male or as a third category. Most people aren't attracted to people who make them feel worse about themselves, and I suspect being treated as male or a third category would make most women feel worse about themselves. Of course I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions, and, once again, my opinions are not those of someone with first-hand experience, so I'm willing to be corrected by those with that experience.
But I'd suspect that having a body that matched your gender would increase a person's self-confidence and, thus, impact attraction in all the ways that self-confidence does for cis-women. Confident women - just like confident men - are more selective (not necessarily in a physical sense), among other things.
I'd also suspect that most people identify as female - whether cis- or not, pre- or post-op, etc, would probably not be attracted to someone who saw them as either male or as a third category. Most people aren't attracted to people who make them feel worse about themselves, and I suspect being treated as male or a third category would make most women feel worse about themselves. Of course I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions, and, once again, my opinions are not those of someone with first-hand experience, so I'm willing to be corrected by those with that experience.
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: Michelle. on May 22, 2011, 01:44:25 AM
Post by: Michelle. on May 22, 2011, 01:44:25 AM
I call digs on Worf!!! I like it's a little rough.
On a serious note, in regards to the OP. Why do you find yourself attracted to post ops?
Also, how do you define and in what context; do you mean "mostly"?
On a serious note, in regards to the OP. Why do you find yourself attracted to post ops?
Also, how do you define and in what context; do you mean "mostly"?
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: FairyGirl on May 22, 2011, 07:25:41 AM
Post by: FairyGirl on May 22, 2011, 07:25:41 AM
I am exactly 11 months post-op yesterday, and I like the same kind of men now as I did pre-op: the ones like Valerie described, very masculine, strong, confident, take-charge kind of guys. I like to be taken and always have. But I also love the way my boyfriend likes to just cuddle up and kiss me to sleep after sex; I love waking up in his arms in the night, kissing some more and then going back to sleep. That to me is pure bliss.
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: FairyGirl on May 22, 2011, 08:10:41 AM
Post by: FairyGirl on May 22, 2011, 08:10:41 AM
hey, men have their ways of getting what they want but so do we. I hope you get that ride in a Porche Valerie, either his, or your own, or some other man who can't resist your charms ;)
Title: Re: Romance post-op
Post by: pretty pauline on May 23, 2011, 07:46:48 AM
Post by: pretty pauline on May 23, 2011, 07:46:48 AM
Quote from: FairyGirl on May 22, 2011, 07:25:41 AMExactly its pure bliss
the ones like Valerie described, very masculine, strong, confident, take-charge kind of guys. I like to be taken and always have. But I also love the way my boyfriend likes to just cuddle up and kiss me to sleep after sex; I love waking up in his arms in the night, kissing some more and then going back to sleep. That to me is pure bliss.
Pauline