Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: lost904 on June 11, 2011, 02:21:43 PM Return to Full Version
Title: am i moving too fast?
Post by: lost904 on June 11, 2011, 02:21:43 PM
Post by: lost904 on June 11, 2011, 02:21:43 PM
my dad has come right out and said he doesnt support my decision and that he thinks im moving too fast because im unsure.in the past two months i have gotten a binder, cut my hair again and started wearing mens boxers (the last one without my parents knowing). now my hair is bright pink and im getting ready to buy mens shirts....
i dont think im moving too fast. after nearly 21 years im ready to make the change and when it comes to me i never do things half assed or slow.
its not in me.
am i really moving too fast? im not unsure and it makes me mad that my family would think this.i would think that i need to go at the pace that is right for me.
i dont think im moving too fast. after nearly 21 years im ready to make the change and when it comes to me i never do things half assed or slow.
its not in me.
am i really moving too fast? im not unsure and it makes me mad that my family would think this.i would think that i need to go at the pace that is right for me.
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: Janet_Girl on June 11, 2011, 02:29:02 PM
Post by: Janet_Girl on June 11, 2011, 02:29:02 PM
You are moving to fast for HIM. He just doesn't want to see you change. Of course you could be 50 and you would still be moving to fast for him.
If you are happy with how things are proceeding that is all that matters.
If you are happy with how things are proceeding that is all that matters.
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: quinn on June 11, 2011, 02:41:08 PM
Post by: quinn on June 11, 2011, 02:41:08 PM
I agree with Janet. It's only too fast if it's too fast for you. You're the one who has to live with (and hopefully, be happy with) the changes you're making, not your dad. Do what feels comfortable for you. You shouldn't rush into anything permanent, like surgery, but what you're doing can easily be reversed if you decide you don't identify as ftm and prefer to be androgynous, or whatever the case may be.
By the way, that's awesome that you've got bright pink hair now ;D
By the way, that's awesome that you've got bright pink hair now ;D
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: TaylorMade on June 11, 2011, 02:57:59 PM
Post by: TaylorMade on June 11, 2011, 02:57:59 PM
Your not moving fast...you do what your happy with and what you feel inside you...
My mom wouldnt even invite me to her wedding cause I wouldnt wear makeup or a dress, I told her that is NOT who I am inside..needless to say her only child was NOT at her wedding..and with me starting to looking into FtM she would prob totally disown me, I am proud of you..you stand up for you..
My mom wouldnt even invite me to her wedding cause I wouldnt wear makeup or a dress, I told her that is NOT who I am inside..needless to say her only child was NOT at her wedding..and with me starting to looking into FtM she would prob totally disown me, I am proud of you..you stand up for you..
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: Frank on June 11, 2011, 03:53:14 PM
Post by: Frank on June 11, 2011, 03:53:14 PM
I have to agree with it just being too fast for him. You're old enough to do what you want, and I'll bet you know what you want so go on ahead.
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: Alex37 on June 11, 2011, 05:11:17 PM
Post by: Alex37 on June 11, 2011, 05:11:17 PM
It may be too fast for your dad, but as long as you're moving at your own pace, you're not moving too fast. I remember when I first started binding and got my hair cut; it was so freeing- congrats!
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: lost904 on June 11, 2011, 10:03:18 PM
Post by: lost904 on June 11, 2011, 10:03:18 PM
thanks everyone! yeah i dont plan to start major streps like surgury until i get the money, which could be years. and even then ill only have my breasts removed and maybe go on T. im excited to begin my journey...it doesnt feel, idk i dont want to say natural but its scary because everyone knows im not a boy and its not a matter of course yet. but ive adjusted to wearing the binder and boxers and thats comfortable but i dont know, it feels right but at the same time...i guess im just scared of someone hurting me.ive found that living transexual is a constant state of confusion when your just beginging to transition. i dont know if my family will keep being around me physically, whether someone will commit a hate crime against me in public, stalk me.....its all very scary. i already have so much to deal with, but i know i cant turn my back on who i am and what i want.i just hope that i make myself happy.
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: Alasdair on June 12, 2011, 01:02:03 AM
Post by: Alasdair on June 12, 2011, 01:02:03 AM
Got on here to reply but of course all you good people say what I want to say! :D
Title: Re: am i moving too fast?
Post by: sneakersjay on June 12, 2011, 07:18:36 AM
Post by: sneakersjay on June 12, 2011, 07:18:36 AM
I think I did things very fast, but then I am more than twice your age. LOL
Figured things out in Feb, had a gender therapist by April, on T by July, hysto in Aug, top surgery in Dec. All the same year.
That was 3 years ago. When it's right for you, it is right for you.
Agree with the others that it is too fast for HIM. It will always be too fast or too soon for them. Nobody wants you to change. So you need to ignore the naysayers and do what is right for YOU. Just as you wouldn't transition because someone else said you should, you shouldn't NOT transition because someone else says you shouldn't.
Figured things out in Feb, had a gender therapist by April, on T by July, hysto in Aug, top surgery in Dec. All the same year.
That was 3 years ago. When it's right for you, it is right for you.
Agree with the others that it is too fast for HIM. It will always be too fast or too soon for them. Nobody wants you to change. So you need to ignore the naysayers and do what is right for YOU. Just as you wouldn't transition because someone else said you should, you shouldn't NOT transition because someone else says you shouldn't.