so, I just got my haircut...first time having anything even near my shoulders and I still feel like it's not short enough. Of course not being out to my mom stopped me from getting the actual hair cut I wanted. I wanted a longer buzz, but for now, I'm stuck with shoulder length until I muster up the guts to cut it short and deal with the consequences and whatever conversations may come with it. I was wondering, how many of you stuck with longer hair (longish?), or did you cut it all off. I think pre-t it's safer to go with short hair if you want to pass more, but that's just my opinion.
What do you think?
pictures are good too. If you have a comparison between short and long hair on someone...just appreciated though, not needed
Thanks guys
~<3~Aiden
Honestly, I've heard of a lot of transguys saying that a buzz (Even a longer one) usually accentuates the feminine features in your face, that and it accentuates the shape of your head, which I heard is bad for passing. I've read a lot about haircuts on FtMs and a lot of people suggest getting it short on the sides and just a little longer on the top - think of a typical business man's haircut. I hear that the 'Traditional man's cut," and "Traditional boy's cut," is most popular among most FtMs.
And then...there's me...I'm not like most FtMs xD My cut is EXTREMELY unconventional. The sides and back were all cut to a 3 and the top is approximately seven to nine inches long in the front. I have it swept to one side and then it's angled to be shorter in the back, much like an a-line. Mind you, I have huge hips and a huge ass, and I can't hope to pass, even now that I'm on T, but the cut suits me well - for now anyway.
Good luck!
Just before I started coming out (almost 2 years ago, dang) I got a pixie cut. You can pass it off as a trendy girl's cut to people you're not out to, and it's easy to style in a more masculine way.
Now I get it cut progressively shorter just about every time I get it cut. At first I hate it and think it's too short, but after 2-3 days it doesn't ever seem short enough, haha.
I think that for most pre-t guys it's probably easier to get read as male with a shorter (not too short!) hair cut. That being said, the first time I was read as male I had a girl's hair cut and I wasn't binding. So, the hair cut isn't everything, and there are some guys that pull off the longer hair better. It probably depends on your face to some extent.
When I came out to my mum she was like, 'so do you want me to cut your hair now?' It was pretty long, but I'm into the whole metal scene and all that jazz, but off it went and the shorter I've had it the more I seem to have passed, though the look totally didn't suit 'ME'.
Anyway after the last cut I decided to grow it back into a styleable length, but it's just kind of coming out of the really awkward Jewfro stage now, the longer hair could be to do with this (it's at the longest, finger length...) but I haven't passed in ages. I can't remember the last time... /sigh
I'm thinking of getting a cool cut but I dunno if it will turn out how I picture it in my head haha but yeah when I am on T and I've had the surgery, and I've got me a goatee, I will just bust out the metaller waterfall of hair. Beard= man so if I'm mistaken from behind I'll just turn around and be like, what you talkin' bout fool.
Or I'll get a nice hat.
Quote from: DevinJW on June 13, 2011, 01:04:47 AM
When I came out to my mum she was like, 'so do you want me to cut your hair now?' It was pretty long, but I'm into the whole metal scene and all that jazz, but off it went and the shorter I've had it the more I seem to have passed, though the look totally didn't suit 'ME'.
Anyway after the last cut I decided to grow it back into a styleable length, but it's just kind of coming out of the really awkward Jewfro stage now, the longer hair could be to do with this (it's at the longest, finger length...) but I haven't passed in ages. I can't remember the last time... /sigh
I'm thinking of getting a cool cut but I dunno if it will turn out how I picture it in my head haha but yeah when I am on T and I've had the surgery, and I've got me a goatee, I will just bust out the metaller waterfall of hair. Beard= man so if I'm mistaken from behind I'll just turn around and be like, what you talkin' bout fool.
Or I'll get a nice hat.
That sounds like a good plan. I like "longer" hair, but then again, I also like the shorter on the sides and longer on top cut too, mostly because you can spike it...and I like spikes
Oh, and i can only hope that my mom will be that chill if and when I come out to her.
I'm extremely lucky. My whole family and everyone I know is very open minded, before I came out, and as the kind of person I am, I kind of avoid associating with closed minded / bigoted people. Luckily, again, I have that luxury because I live in London :)
People here are bothered by some things and not others. Like, I could be FTM but if I followed the right style (trendy or chav) they probably wouldn't care, but being alternative, THAT gets you looks down streets ;P
For me, the hair made all the difference. Before I cut my hair, I dressed in guys clothes, bound my chest, and did everything I could to look masculine, but I was still always read as female. As soon as I cut my hair short, I began to be read as male, or at least as someone of indeterminate gender, about 90% of the time (which was awkward, because I was not out to anyone at that point). And I like having short hair - it's so easy, and I can cut it myself. For reference, here are some old photos of me (3-4 years old at this point):
Pre-haircut
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi66.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fh277%2Fhikergirl89%2FFall%25202007%2FPA200116-1.jpg&hash=30c06d7f5aed1357598e2abed5d3c13c1d00946c)
Post-haircut (still pre-T)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi66.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fh277%2Fhikergirl89%2FFall%25202007%2Fn570861772_1044294_4006-2.jpg&hash=4728474c92ef599e322336684dac6918f812eba2)
But a lot of folks like having long hair, too, and there's nothing wrong with that, although it probably would make it more difficult for most people to pass as male, at least without being on T.
Quote from: GentlemanRDP on June 13, 2011, 12:59:56 AM
Honestly, I've heard of a lot of transguys saying that a buzz (Even a longer one) usually accentuates the feminine features in your face, that and it accentuates the shape of your head, which I heard is bad for passing.
From my experience, being pre-hrt, I would say that's true, at least for me. But I've never grown out my hair that much.
The most I can say is don't do something you're not comfortable with. If you go for a crewcut because everyone tells you "you CAN'T have long hair, that's TOO GIRLY" and you're uncomfortable, people are gonna pick up on that.
First time I shaved my hair into a mohawk, it was shouldlength and dyed blonde and pink. Without even trying, I passed about half the time, and that was years ago. I shaved it and I just had instantly more confidence, and it obviously showed.
If you're able to at all, try photoshopping different hairstyles onto yourself. That's what I did with hair color for a long time, to see if it'd look decent before going out and wrecking my hair on a whim.
I did look into different hairstyles and did a little photoshop, but couldn't really find anything. I found that if I pull my bottom layers back and just let my top layers down in a more boy-like style, I recognize the person in the mirror...after 17 years, I see me. I know I want shorter hair, not super short, but shorter than I have...it's just, explaining it to all of my friends that remember me in october with ringlets to my butt. I know I shouldn't have to explain it to them, but... they're very conservative, and think i still am, but i'm really not.
That's a pain, dude. I'm sorry, I had to endure a lot of that from my less-close family members when I chopped 14 inches off my hair a few years back.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi52.tinypic.com%2Fzwnma.jpg&hash=bf39a6b29589eefa4b8b28fa3462c7c0f22bc1d7)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi55.tinypic.com%2F152di03.jpg&hash=c8ed03f54ccd14710cde0c51a59e54c0a01be635)
I hated getting rid of my locks, but I felt that passing was more important than keeping them. I love short hair, but I really want to lock my hair again in the future.
Skakid: love your locks! I looove me some dreadlocks :-) (your buzzed head looks great too by the way!)
Its funny--I buzzed my head all the time pre-T, like for years and years.
Now that I'm transitioning I have been letting my hair grow out a bit. Granted, I really love a buzzed head on girls and long-ish hair on guys but still...
I have found that buzzing my head used to make my face look a little more round and feminine while having a bit of a sticky-up faux hawk or otherwise taller hair makes my face look more angular (and me a bit taller).
Don't feel the pressure to get a traditionally male hair cut; go with what you're comfortable with.
I cut about 2 feet off shortly after my hysto, months after starting T. It is now to my waist and growing back ever so slowly. I quit cutting it when my Dad quit cutting it back when I was 10 or 11. I haven't noticed any problem in passing due to my hair. To each their own tho.
Quote from: xchrisx on June 13, 2011, 09:03:32 AM
Skakid: love your locks! I looove me some dreadlocks :-) (your buzzed head looks great too by the way!)
Thanks so much. I really loved them too. I cut them off myself and I still have them in a ziploc bag in my room. I'm waiting for a good day to bury them.
I think that pre-t guys probably pass better with short hair but I passed just fine regardless. I keep it buzzed short with a rattail now though.
I feel more confident with my hair at a medium length in a really choppy, modern style. I think I look like a dork or really fem with really short hair. I can't grow sideburns or anything so that makes it even worse to me and I think people can tell straight away.
all pre t
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi150.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fs95%2Ftriggercity79%2F06c6f02a.jpg&hash=9cdceece317087197ed1e544fdb510fce1311649)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi52.tinypic.com%2Fayvr68.jpg&hash=cb9cc75dbc3b889eb229ea5b0f3143ef7e4632b9)
then me now (my display pic)
I think my hair where it is now is the shortest I'm currently comfortable with it being, but passing isn't so much a first priorty for me at the moment because I live with my parents, and I'm not out. It's current legnth though is a pretty drastic change from where it was nearly at my butt just two years ago. I'm really getting into j-rock/visual kei and I kind of enjoy the slightly femme look I can get with my hair.
This is what my hair looked like a year ago. Pre T.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi.imgur.com%2FugDuq.jpg&hash=c95b475afb7eb40b49800c0cc959fee92daf2912)
It's shorter now, but still long for a guy. Since I'm starting T soon I don't know if I should let it grow so the facial changes are easier on my mom or get it cut. It's long enough to touch my collar in the back now. I honestly wouldn't even know what short cut to go with.
Quote from: KrisRenee on June 13, 2011, 12:52:10 AM
so, I just got my haircut...first time having anything even near my shoulders and I still feel like it's not short enough. Of course not being out to my mom stopped me from getting the actual hair cut I wanted. I wanted a longer buzz, but for now, I'm stuck with shoulder length until I muster up the guts to cut it short and deal with the consequences and whatever conversations may come with it. I was wondering, how many of you stuck with longer hair (longish?), or did you cut it all off. I think pre-t it's safer to go with short hair if you want to pass more, but that's just my opinion.
What do you think?
pictures are good too. If you have a comparison between short and long hair on someone...just appreciated though, not needed
Thanks guys
~<3~Aiden
i'm not an ftm, but i would suggest not to change something about yourself unless
you want to. don't do it just because of the belief that men wear their hair short. it's far from true, especially nowadays. just as there are women who will chop all their hair off, there are men who wear their's long.
I'm not doing it because of what other people think persay, it's more to what and who I see in the mirror. I feel like it's the difference between seeing a girl, and seeing me. I'm not going to do anything for anyone, but others opinions and comments can keep me from doind something i want to do, but that's just the kind of person I am. I want to...trust me, I do, I'm just scared to deal with the after effects.
Wow, really glad this topic was brought up. I was thinking for a minute "dude does every FTM have to cut their hair?" I have (dred)locs to about my lower back and don't plan on cutting them unless I want a differnt style but as for passing ...yeah not so much of a big deal to me as much as how I feel on the inside. A lot of guys in my culture rock long hair. I am not on T, I bind, & I have a feminine face :( or at least I think I do..unfortunately.... so I don't pass except for a brief second when they say "Sir" then the shocked look a few seconds after. I say whatever makes a person feel good.
I was trying to give an image but haven't figured that part out yet..sorry :-\
Funny you mention the "sir" thing. One of my friends that I came out to recently who was totally surprised and in the mindset of "you're joking right?" actually called me sir a couple weeks ago. I froze and just looked at him. I think he's going to come around. Buuut, he's also the one that told me he'd kill me If I cut my hair. We'll see I guess.
Quote from: KrisRenee on June 13, 2011, 08:40:27 PM
Funny you mention the "sir" thing. One of my friends that I came out to recently who was totally surprised and in the mindset of "you're joking right?" actually called me sir a couple weeks ago. I froze and just looked at him. I think he's going to come around. Buuut, he's also the one that told me he'd kill me If I cut my hair. We'll see I guess.
growing my hair seemed to take me from male to female. i'm not entirely sure if i truly passed as male before transitioning, maybe more androgynous since i had such feminine features. alot of mtf might say "oh, lucky you, you're so lucky!" not really. having to live as a male who's feminine in appearance and mannerisms is no cake walk
I'd had my hair short for years before transitioning, just changed the style so I could pass better. However, I'm getting sick of it - now I've been on T for a while, I want to get away from the ultra-masculine look and go for something more *me*. Something like this: http://evanstyle5.cafe24.com/xe/men_best/467782 (http://evanstyle5.cafe24.com/xe/men_best/467782)
Will probably have to dye it, though - don't know how well the salt 'n' pepper look goes down with longer hair :P
My hair is at my shoulders now but when I came out I got a short back and sides as I wanted to pass, I didn't pass at all. I thought there was no point keeping it short as I didn't pass and prefered long hair so I grew it out. I passed when it was medium length like 80% of the time and now I have long hair again I don't pass even though i'm almost over 8 months on T. I like my hair though so i'm not cutting it.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi32.tinypic.com%2F2nixkix.jpg&hash=d0753bac23afdafc3a3b1a5e04d0f7de38dd10e2)
I passed most when my hair was this length.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi55.tinypic.com%2F2zybner.jpg&hash=7bfc2bbdcdcbe8ec72002c9bedcca21428eb23b0)
My hair is this length now, I normally tie it back as I don't pass with it down. This picture isn't that bad passing wise as my hair is a bit behind my ear and away from the face.
Quote from: Nathan. on June 14, 2011, 03:22:11 PM
My hair is at my shoulders now but when I came out I got a short back and sides as I wanted to pass, I didn't pass at all. I thought there was no point keeping it short as I didn't pass and prefered long hair so I grew it out. I passed when it was medium length like 80% of the time and now I have long hair again I don't pass even though i'm almost over 8 months on T. I like my hair though so i'm not cutting it.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi32.tinypic.com%2F2nixkix.jpg&hash=d0753bac23afdafc3a3b1a5e04d0f7de38dd10e2)
I passed most when my hair was this length.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi55.tinypic.com%2F2zybner.jpg&hash=7bfc2bbdcdcbe8ec72002c9bedcca21428eb23b0)
My hair is this length now, I normally tie it back as I don't pass with it down. This picture isn't that bad passing wise as my hair is a bit behind my ear and away from the face.
Your hair's about the same length mine is, just styled differently.
I had a moment of "argh, must do something" a while back and chopped off all my hair.. and lost every last piece of passing I had.
I looked like a feminine man with it long, but a butch woman with it short, and you know what, I "am" a feminine man, I just thought somehow that shorter would make me pass better, it didn't at all.
Since then, I've let it grow out, dyed it dark blue, and dreaded it.
Much better!
Screw passing! I love my hair this way!
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2F30.media.tumblr.com%2Ftumblr_lmssg4CmJf1qdbe0ro1_500.jpg&hash=889b2202ba1224f1948a95d87111cd7d4dd71eab)
Miniar, if you don't mind me asking, what's your tattoo?
Also, the hair looks good on you.
It's a runestave constructed out of my husband's "nickname" I have for him. It's symbolic of where I am in life and who with.
I love this cut http://evanstyle5.cafe24.com/xe/men_best/467782 (http://evanstyle5.cafe24.com/xe/men_best/467782) Nemo ! I too have a salt & pepper in the mix..go for it!!! Miniar I'm with you... "long hair don't care" ... it's respect that I want the opinions don't matter, so passing ...maybe one day. KrisRennee hope everything works out for you.
Quote from: kalshady on June 13, 2011, 01:43:57 PM
all pre t
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi150.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fs95%2Ftriggercity79%2F06c6f02a.jpg&hash=9cdceece317087197ed1e544fdb510fce1311649)
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi52.tinypic.com%2Fayvr68.jpg&hash=cb9cc75dbc3b889eb229ea5b0f3143ef7e4632b9)
then me now (my display pic)
You totally rock the long hair and the short hair. I probably wouldn't believe you were born female if I didn't know already.
I used to have short hair as a kid and once i hit puberty people would call me "pat" and "it" wondering what i was. so i grew my hair out so i wouldn't get picked on/bullied. As soon as came out to my family i cut my hair short.
It was weird, living as female i was more comfortable with short hair. Now, I like keeping it longer. Don't ask me why. Haven't cut my hair in a year, since last june. I was sick of going and having them use clippers. When I was a kid I went in and said "I want it short" and the hair dresser would cut it short.
Now, I have to be specific which is very frustrating. You're the expert, cut it short and make me look good. How hard can that be?
So yeah, just wear it how you want! Often cutting it short if you're pre-t WILL accentuate the feminine features.
My friend and I actually just set a date for buzzing my hair...she's coming over to do it this friday, I'm pretty excited to say the least. I hope I like it, but if I don't it's just hair, it will grow back, and the way my hair grows it'll be back close to my shoulders in six months. just in time for snow...
It really just depends on how you style it I think. I like my hair cut short in the back and my bangs down to my chin or at least my cheek bone. Right now its at my chin and my bangs below my cheek bone. I don't care if I look fem. I just like my hair easier to deal with and to stop blowing around slapping me in my face when it was almost to my waist. I hate long hair now.
Good luck with your haircut :D
Okay, so my mom chickened out on letting my friend cut my hair, so she paid for me to get it professionally done... I love it. Maybe still a little long, but much shorter and I'd be bald, so I'll keep it. It's what most girls would consider a short pixie, but still versatile enough to be styled the way I want it...Very happy with it. I'm thinking I will keep it for a while.
Quote from: Brent123 on June 16, 2011, 10:36:12 PM
You totally rock the long hair and the short hair. I probably wouldn't believe you were born female if I didn't know already.
haha thanks dawg. i loved my long hair but the short hair is jus...more me. honestly ive "passed" since i was 5 and jus an example that sticks out is the girls lockin me outta the bathroom in 6th grade in a new school. ->-bleeped-<- like that used to happen all the time, ppl would tell me i was goin in the wrong bathroom etc. they wouldnt believe me when i told them my name, still dont if i gotta use my legal name. i even get ppl think my id is wrong bc of my name and the F
been like this forever
long hair:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1230.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee481%2Fajborelli%2Ftumblr_li9cbbQmwn1qdvc21o1_1280.jpg&hash=87c202a17acc0fb9345579f67cea03ae18a895ad)
and than short hair(ignore how silly i look):
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1230.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee481%2Fajborelli%2F247266_104212056338314_100002485593630_32840_4645940_n-2.jpg&hash=ff04a5718209a325edf6bf48f96cb266e6b84bb6)
i pass much better now i think. i look more mainly and there is less of annoying strands of hair lol.
Quote from: ajborelli on June 24, 2011, 01:19:42 PM
long hair:
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1230.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee481%2Fajborelli%2Ftumblr_li9cbbQmwn1qdvc21o1_1280.jpg&hash=87c202a17acc0fb9345579f67cea03ae18a895ad)
and than short hair(ignore how silly i look):
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fi1230.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fee481%2Fajborelli%2F247266_104212056338314_100002485593630_32840_4645940_n-2.jpg&hash=ff04a5718209a325edf6bf48f96cb266e6b84bb6)
i pass much better now i think. i look more mainly and there is less of annoying strands of hair lol.
you do look a lot more like a guy, good for you! cute too lol
aw thanks :) and i like to act like i am a 6 year old boy lol
I took this one morning when I was getting ready for work. I looked cuter in the mirror than it came out in the photo, but that's always the way with me. I wasn't trying to pass or anything, since everyone knows me as female there (or if they think "it", they keep it to themselves for the most part), and I don't plan on cutting my hair much shorter than about shoulder length. I'm afraid of looking too much like a butch woman, when I'd rather look like a pretty boy.
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Fimg823.imageshack.us%2Fimg823%2F9210%2Fmirror011211.jpg&hash=674b7e63e0b43c8427bc2c222a288e86303be114)
I've been cutting my hair short for the longest time.
Since I was 13.
This is my typical haircut:
http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/197164_10150125174274341_646704340_6268719_3898852_n.jpg (http://a8.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/197164_10150125174274341_646704340_6268719_3898852_n.jpg)
It's grown out a little, though.
And this is me, with the same haircut, "manned up" with makeup (warning: I look angry...but I'm not):
http://a6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/184609_103030156446071_100002172611267_24149_7971469_n.jpg (http://a6.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/184609_103030156446071_100002172611267_24149_7971469_n.jpg)
I let my hair grow really long a couple of years ago, and loved it.
But I would rather be a male with long hair than a female with long hair.