what evil thing or biological adaptation creates the condition we experience, then scatters us to the four winds so we lack even the companionship of others like us who can validate our experiences as similar to their own. we are the minor of the minorities for even minorities cluster in communities to support each other with shared experiences and culture. sure their are support groups but how many of us have gone, and of those who have, how many have seen what i have? a small group of terrified souls hoping they wont be cast out by the community they so rightly belong for not being trans enough or not following the norms in appearance of their professed gender. what i saw were terrified women and men peaking out from behind their walls of gender normality pleading in silence please see me, oh god please let them see me, and what of the ones that have no access to even this condolence they are like ghosts in an abandoned building tapping on walls and windows pleading to the living who arnt present in hopeless attempts to validate their existence
i deeply admire all the t girls and t men who progress threw this hell with their souls intact.
Jessi
I have a belief that it is genetic. We are not the only creatures on this earth that this phenomenon occurs. Many gastropods (snails, slugs, etc) are known to live half their lives as one sex and the other half as the other sex (sequential hermaphroditism) while others live with both sets of male and female reproductive organs at the same time(simultaneous hermaphroditism) but cannot self fertilize. ;)
Thank you Jesse, great question. I have wondered this too, often in kind of a "why me?" sort of way. Why did I get anointed with this? But, whining aside, I've also been blessed with other beautiful and wondrous characteristics (music, technical skills, children, love). Guess it's all just part of the big mosaic that is me.
I've always been trans and I always will be. There are just some times where I'm more at peace with it.
Jesse, Just try & relax. It is just who we are & nothing absolutely nothing we can do to change. Try to accept & enjoy your life as much as you can. Enjoy the emotions & be glad for the person you are.
At least we are no longer alone. I have brothers and sisters who I love and can talk to. The shell that surrounded me has gone. I can now live. I would never have been able to do that without you people. My family, my friends, my sisters and brothers.
Love you
Cindy
Thanks to Susan's Place I can contact my brothers and sisters all over the world and seek comfort and advice.
Otherwise there is really only one other trans person I know locally and they are relative anyway.
Why does this thing happen? Ultimately as there is no way to reverse the process, it is irrelevant, but it looks to be partly genetic or epigenetic, and partly at least fetal environmental factors.
Either way we have to deal with as it affects us now, so it is pointless getting involved with self pity and "why me?". The important thing is how we deal with it.
As Karen, I now view life with a lot more empathy, and insight into others suffering in various ways, and an explosion of emotional sensitivity that is astounding me all the time. I can now feel true joy, where before there was mild satisfaction. And lots more, all good. I refuse to judge others, so I won't be terrifying anyone into silence. I can only speak from my own limited experience, so if someone disagrees with something I say, that's ok too.
Karen.