Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transgender talk => Topic started by: BillieTex on July 25, 2011, 09:07:46 PM

Title: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: BillieTex on July 25, 2011, 09:07:46 PM
Ok a first fo me, I have been working part time at a place with a lot of regulars for 5 months, and a lady walked up with the I hate to ask.... she and her friends were split 50 50, i admitted i was not a gal (wasn't even trying to be)  and she said "I thought so" I told her it happens from time to time and don't sweat it.... 50% and wearing a cami with a shelf bra under my t shirt to keep 'em in check, mayby next week no cami and let my hair loose he he he ;D I was not embarassed, and quite happy tonight, gonna be a good night's sleep Yeaaaa!!!!! Sorry I know many of you are long past this point but let my have this moment... ;D
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: Princess of Hearts on July 25, 2011, 10:31:22 PM
Seems rather rude to ask outright.  It is late here so perhaps I have read your post wrong?    Would you go up to a person and say 'err...I hate to ask but are you a homosexual?'   I am glad that you aren't embarrassed and are happy within yourself, self acceptance comes before everything else. 

P.S. I see that you are a staff member that might explain it.   

Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: BillieTex on July 26, 2011, 05:53:02 AM
Of corse it's rude to ask!!!! that goes without saying!!! I try very hard to ignore rude and look to the positive - seems most of my life has been filled with negitives and dissappointments so I'm at a point I gotta try. Oh, and - staff? I'm happy ot have a job(s) he he
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: Kimberley on July 26, 2011, 06:25:12 AM
Yes it was rude to ask but I see a positive to this. If she had to ask then she wasn't sure which means that you are passable. If you were not passable then she would not have asked.


Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: tekla on July 26, 2011, 09:03:38 AM
Seems rather rude to ask outright.

It's the USA, we're pretty much the rudest people on earth.  It's simultaneously our best and worst national trait.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: Hikari on July 26, 2011, 09:11:30 AM
Some people have a bit more tact at least. Yesterday when I was in arby's dressed in male clothes (though, Tripp pants are kinda gender neutral, and so are t-shirts. I did also have a bit of eyeliner on, but hey I was wearing all black) and this woman who was walking by our table on her way to the bathroom stops in her tracks, waits a second, and then her expression changes a bit, as if she figured something out and tells me "oh, that is some nice hair you have there". I say thanks and even though I know that she was trying to figure out my gender, she complimented me in the end, rather than insulting me.

I am kinda used to being stared and and such, so it isn't too big of a deal, but it is nice when people have some tact.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: BillieTex on July 26, 2011, 07:16:22 PM
there we go trying to make a negitive into a positive
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: GinaDouglas on July 30, 2011, 12:10:44 AM
I never had a customer at work ask me, but a few have asked my co-workers.

But what I think is rude is when a complete stranger comes running after me and asks if they can take a picture of me and them.  I do it, but geez.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: Dana_H on July 30, 2011, 01:38:03 AM
Wow!  That IS rude.  I would never go up and ask a total stranger for a picture!  Well, I do it at the science-fiction conventions with cosplayers, but that's completely different.  ;)   (I am SOOOO looking forward to GalaxyFest this coming February!)
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: JulieC. on July 31, 2011, 12:08:21 PM
It's rude but I would take a positive out of that too.  Half of her friends vote I was female.  And in the end they had to ask to be sure.  For me that would be.....Yeahhhhh! 
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: eshaver on July 31, 2011, 08:27:27 PM
I dunno, some des folks ain't got no decent upbringin............. ellen  :P
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: Keaira on July 31, 2011, 09:01:22 PM
My best friend, who works in a different area of the factory I work at told me last night she has had 4 people ask if I have had SRS yet. She tells them she knows about as much about my junk as she knows about theirs. 1. you'd think that with a rumor mill as fast as ours would have that answered/ twisted by now 2. why the fascination? 3. Maybe I some secret admirers? 4. I still dont look very feminine.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: noeleena on August 02, 2011, 04:13:59 AM
Hi.

Rude not at all . for me i wellcome people coming up to me & asking . tho i preempted that because of being in the media  on T V  & interviews for Papers as well. & being well known.  those that dont know me will look at me & wonder. as you see in my pic a bit different . im not trying to be male or female so as people see me & get to know who i am ,   i enjoy being seen & talk to & with people ,

This of cause will depend on self worth , confindece in your self  as a person , & being one strong woman who knows who she is , & how to be constantly  in front of people all the time, i said woman because thats how im accepted . tho im intersexed , that has helped me tremendously. both men well some , & women accept im different yet no problems  ,

women are more at ease with me of cause, . & thats not to say i dont have some neat men as friends , & that has surprised me because i thought most would shun me , so it goes to  show , there is acceptance when you go about it in the rightway, & my demeaner shows as i interact with people , being out going interested in others as well. & inviteing people in to you life is really just so neat, . why do i have ,,,,so,,,so,,,, many friends , i think youll know why.

...noeleena...
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: justmeinoz on August 02, 2011, 05:43:22 AM
Best answer-"and which are you?" But then I do like to mess with peoples heads.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: jmaxley on August 05, 2011, 09:40:45 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on August 02, 2011, 05:43:22 AM
Best answer-"and which are you?"
Win!  ;D  The next time someone asks me, I'm totally using this.
Title: Re: "I hate to ask II"
Post by: BillieTex on August 06, 2011, 05:28:34 PM
Quote from: justmeinoz on August 02, 2011, 05:43:22 AM
Best answer-"and which are you?" But then I do like to mess with peoples heads.

I love it that!!!! >:-)