Ok so today i was chatting with my friend she had asked me why i wasnt wearing a bra and i looked at her and said they not that big yet, she disagreed and we started talking about this when another friend who doesnt know about me pops up. she over hears a bit and assumes we are talking about gay guys and just says they are disgusting........... I tried for 40 min to change her mind but she was soooooo stubborn and well i am upset because she was my least religious catholic friend( i have way to religious the pope says gay is wrong so has to be kind of Catholics[the sadest stereotype ones])........ I am sad because i know know that their is no point in me telling her or any other friend because well yea shes homophobic and that means her simple mind wont see me as a girl but some freak which hurts............
Just had to speak my mind sorry.
Baby shoes,
you starting to go through the whole gambit of bigotted, dogmatic religious teachings hitting you full braodside.
Like: "You not meant to "change" what the Good Lord made you... girl brains with a Wini between your legs. Eish!" Like to hell with your brain, the Wini sausage is what counts, eh!
It is INDOCTRINATION that makes them think that way. All of homophobia is. Mention the cows and the bulls on the meadows and they say: "WE ARE SO SUPERIOUR TO THEM!!! Or do you want to be a cow or bull or dog for that matter?"
Heard it all and seen it before. All a lot of selfrighteous hogwash.
Fact remains though, it's not just you that has to transition --- your friends too - WITH YOU, in order to accept you.
SOME JUST CAN'T COME ALONG ON THIS JOURNEY, it is asking just too much of them.
Don't be judgemental, they have their own issues to deal with... that's just life.
I hope this makes some sense?
Now go out to buy a sports bra, and stop bickering about it. Put it on and move on.
IT IS NO BIG DEAL, so don't make it one either.
You a girl, girls wear bras (most of them, most of the time, right?)
Hug,
Axelle
I had a Roman Catholic friend who didn't accept me as a girl either; she wouldn't mind if I looked like one but made it clear that in her mind I would never be one. I tried explaining but it didn't help at all.
But that was better than I thought already, since she is very devout. At least she didn't just say "you're such a freak, I won't be friends with you any more", and she has never suggested that it's wrong or sinful or whatever that I want to be / dress and act like a girl. I tend to think from their point of view—having been brought up thinking that way all along, it's really hard to change such preconceived ideas that they think to be true for their whole life. We all have our own such preconceived ideas too, that are very hard to change. So I was never too overly upset about it, except for one particular night after we came back from the beach and somehow we ended up arguing I am or am not a girl as we were walking home.
Unfortunately, from the moment I moved somewhere else and became full time as a girl, I can't quite afford to have friends who won't even try to accept me as a girl, because it would be detrimental to my state of mind, as well as presenting big problems if I see her and she starts referring to me as a guy as I generally don't tell anyone around me these days that I wasn't born a girl... so I quietly stopped contacting her. Despite this, I really don't feel angry or hurt by her about this; I can understand why she wouldn't accept this part of me. I know many will say that they don't deserve to be your friend if they can't accept the person you are, but I think that's too idealistic an idea of friends. I myself am not sure I can accept a friend who, to list some extreme examples, tells me they are a paedophile, or a criminal organization leader, or a spy against my country, etc. etc. ... if in their minds, being transsexual is something also on that list, then of course they aren't going to accept me, and I don't blame them.
So I hope you won't be too upset about it either! However, I know that a large number of Roman Catholics (especially those with higher education) secretly disagree with many of the Vatican's official teachings but wouldn't even think about missing going to church every Sunday (I would know—I was Catholic too and had been in many Catholic schools), so don't always assume that they won't accept you. After all, President Obama isn't supposed to support some things as a Christian himself either, so...
Never mind. Being trans you are almost certainly a few points higher than them on the IQ scale having had to be alert all the time, and you have the moral high ground. Have you asked her why a woman can be a saint but not a priest, for instance?
Karen, wearing her heretic's hat.
Oh honey pie, I SO do want be a Saint, halo and all.
Not so sure about a priest, eh.
Have too bad a reputation collected for me in my life this far.
Too many walked through their own pee, pretending they now can walk on water... not so good.
Axelle
"walked through their own pee, pretending they now can walk on water..."
I'll remember that in case it comes in handy!
I remember from my previous Catholic "education" that it's because Jesus only chose men to be his disciples, so that implies that God only wants men to run his church! :laugh:
Quote from: Axélle on August 03, 2011, 07:00:09 AM
Now go out to buy a sports bra, and stop bickering about it. Put it on and move on.
i think its now down to laziness lol :D
Quote from: apple pie on August 03, 2011, 08:05:55 AM
I remember from my previous Catholic "education" that it's because Jesus only chose men to be his disciples, so that implies that God only wants men to run his church! :laugh:
:laugh: :laugh: haha perfect example of how corruption can use anything
And that is not even so! Because there was Marie-Magdalene with quite some jealousies by the other guys do to her high importance to Jesus.
Also, there was a trans-man being a Pope. Well documented when he/she gave birth during some procession. So still now, becoming a new pope, they have to lift up his/her gown to make sure there is a 'dangle' there as prescribed, eh.
Welcome to THAT creed, eish.
Axelle
Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on August 03, 2011, 08:14:10 AM
i think its now down to laziness lol :D
I bet you'll love it, so stop procrastinating and get one next time you pass by the department store or whatever :D
Apple Pie, I SECOND THAT!
all this talk about bras... like so pre-puberty.
BTW, one thing since are still at it for the OP.
Bend over forward so that your chesticles (boobies) dangle, think of a cow udder, and then put the chosen cup to see if you fill it.
That's your cup size, the band size you measured before UNDER your breasts.
Right? Right!
Axelle
Quote from: Axélle on August 03, 2011, 09:20:23 AM
Apple Pie, I SECOND THAT!
all this talk about bras... like so pre-puberty.
BTW, one thing since are still at it for the OP.
Bend over forward so that your chesticles (boobies) dangle, think of a cow udder, and then put the chosen cup to see if you fill it.
That's your cup size, the band size you measured before UNDER your breasts.
Right? Right!
Axelle
lol you just made me picture myself as a dairy cow!!!!!!!!!!
Heehee, same system ain't it.
Once they get real big and saggy even more so.
It's what we want, it's what we get, eh.
:-)
Axelle
PS: But that cup-size-dairy-cow-system works, even the Queen of E is using it --- if it makes you feel any better. Giggle
A lot of people feel one way about some group of 'others' then they do when it comes down to people they know.
Most people who are not prejudiced began that journey by meeting, or knowing, one person. One person who it wasn't true about.
You can't try to change her mind, that will only make her put up her defenses. You have to take a more subtle approach, take everything she says and repeat it back to her in the form of a question. After she answers do it again, eventually she'll stumble on her own logic and then things will start to sink in. I feel like a lot of people don't like gays because they think it's the appropriate response based off society, and not a response they derived themselves.
I had somebody tell me once that they thought 2 guys having sex was about the most disgusting thing they could imagine, and that's why they didn't like gay guys... and I said well guess what, 2 straight people having sex is just as disgusting to them, and they don't hate you for it.
I find it's best to not try to change someones mind, but simply point out their own logic to them and see how they respond.
Mmm... Sometimes people can surprise you though. My Mother-In-Law is very religious. The last time I saw her I had come out to her husband. I was pretty depressed at the time but he said that he knew. And so did pretty much everyone. But she told me that she loves me no matter what. I was totally blindsided by that. We had discussed my being transgender years ago. And she had not been supportive at all.
So, never give up hope sweetie. *hugs*
It is very tough to go on sometimes when others don't accept us as we are but instead try to see us as they want to. In the end you have to be true to who YOU are not who they want you to be. And as you know-it's not always easy.
Randi