So, I went to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes tonight and one thing I noticed is that my aversion to violence seems to have intensified... to the point where I really don't want to watch anything with violence in it for a good, long while. Things like that never really bothered me before, but now, it's almost.. I don't know. Painful, or something. I was wondering if anyone has noticed an increase in aversion to watching violence since starting HRT?
Abso-->-bleeped-<-ing-lutely! [sic] Sex and the city :-)
It REALLY puts me off so much, I would just get up and leave.
Violent stuff I now find most revolting.
It's been coming a long while though, and is not just due to HRT. Some Old Age? Eh.
Honey... I think with less T we do some more social growing up.
Even those violently noisy car and bike exhausts REALLY revolt me.
ALL seem to have written one BIG T on them. Ridiculous.
Would that violent noise output be inversely related to member size?
I keep wondering
Axelle
for the most part, yeah. i still like to play fighting video games/ actions games sometimes, but of course i still want to play as a female character. i think i enjoy that different from feeling "macho." i enjoy movies like elektra. it's a certain kind of thing i admire in females, because it's unique that they aren't the complete gender stereotype. i play some of the fighting games i used to play as a kid. that was my outlet. that was the thing i did to forget all about my problems. it's kind of just a thing you want to keep doing once you've tried it. i'm not really consistent the way you all might be.
Thought it was just me :laugh: :laugh:
I never liked it in the first place.
It's all about anger, one does something bad and the other one takes revenge.
I like movies who will touch me in some way, sometimes a movie who will give me tears in the eyes and another time movies who will make me laugh.
About the violence in real life.....I don't get it.
It looks that people are forgetting how to talk.
They can't get a agree to disagree or making their points clear.
It's apparently easier to use violence to make your point clear......stupid.
So, hugs everyone from a peacefull
Annette
I have not start HRT yet, I hope to on Monday when I see my Doc. but I think that yes the T has a great deal to do with the agression that male's have and like to see, this is just in general, there are men who can keep there male behavior under control, not many but they are out there, that being said when your T is lowered and estrogen is taking effect then yes I think it would change your view of the male T driven activities. Aloha.
Jennie
Quote from: annette on August 07, 2011, 03:30:46 AM
I never liked it in the first place.
It's all about anger, one does something bad and the other one takes revenge.
I like movies who will touch me in some way, sometimes a movie who will give me tears in the eyes and another time movies who will make me laugh.
About the violence in real life.....I don't get it.
It looks that people are forgetting how to talk.
They can't get a agree to disagree or making their points clear.
It's apparently easier to use violence to make your point clear......stupid.
So, hugs everyone from a peacefull
Annette
Nice point.
The only violent movie I have seen for a while and 'liked' was 'No Country for Old Men' but it was a repugnance of violence that drove the film.
I've posted before saying society is getting more violent, and have been, rightly, shot down for not supplying the proof. I think we have the same degree of violence, or less, that the past generations. But we are so more effective at achieving the outcome. It is difficult to beat someone to death, unless you are either an unlucky amateur or a professional. Any fool can shoot some one. I think we are more violent and we are more effective at it and very less caring.
Young men have forever have strutted their stuff. It is what boys do,
Young women bitch to be top bitch, that's what women do.
(I'm deliberately being sexist)
But now we kill each other. Before we fought.
I won't go on.
Cindy
HRT sounds so boring. =.=
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on August 07, 2011, 03:49:05 AM
HRT sounds so boring. =.=
Did you enjoy that movie sucker punch??? you know fighting and girls in tight cloths?? well every boy does!! and when i left half way because i was disgusted every guy couldnt understand so yea hrt fixes those stupid enjoyments we had :D :D bring on twilight lol ;) ;)
Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on August 07, 2011, 03:55:15 AM
Did you enjoy that movie sucker punch??? you know fighting and girls in tight cloths?? well every boy does!! and when i left half way because i was disgusted every guy couldnt understand so yea hrt fixes those stupid enjoyments we had :D :D bring on twilight lol ;) ;)
I watched the movie with 2 girls and a guy.
I hate it and left half way through, the other three kept watching, the other 2 girls liked it, the guy i think had mixed feelings.
Go figure, maybe it's cause not everyone's the same and these things are personality differences only marginally related to HRT?
I find so many of these threads attribute things to HRT that seem to me to be just as easily explained by psychological personality traits, possibly evolving as a result of progress in transition physiologically and/or mentally.
I hated sucker punch, not cause of the violence so much (I have a violent streak), but because the plot was extremely thin and seemed only to justify extended action sequences.
"Women don't like violence" is a gender stereotype people. Real people, real life people, come in all kinds of personality types.
And it's hard to attribute causes. But please don't make out that it's 'unfemale' to be violent. It's a stereotype.
Quote from: Asfsd4214 on August 07, 2011, 04:02:23 AM
I watched the movie with 2 girls and a guy.
I hate it and left half way through, the other three kept watching, the other 2 girls liked it, the guy i think had mixed feelings.
Go figure, maybe it's cause not everyone's the same and these things are psychological different only marginally related to HRT?
I find so many of these threads attribute things to HRT that seem to me to be just as easily explained by psychological personality traits, possibly evolving as a result of progress in transition physiologically and/or mentally.
I hated sucker punch, not cause of the violence so much (I have a violent streak), but because the plot was extremely thin and seemed only to justify extended action sequences.
"Women don't like violence" is a gender stereotype people. Real people, real life people, come in all kinds of personality types.
And it's hard to attribute causes. But please don't make out that it's 'unfemale' to be violent. It's a stereotype.
calm down just playing with trista :) :) and
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on August 07, 2011, 03:56:37 AM
TT.TT
haha
It is difficult to beat someone to death, unless you are either an unlucky amateur or a professional. Any fool can shoot some one. I think we are more violent and we are more effective at it
That's why on the American Frontier they called the Colt .45 'the great equalizer' - before that, the biggest, strongest and meanest ruled, what did Hobbs call it? The war of all against all?
But Kat,
You were one who chastised me that modern society is less violent. It may be but it is more successful at it.
So what weight do we use?
Cindy
Here's the weird deal, and I've looked at some stats on this too, so it's not just anecdotal. The vast majority of people I know who have really got their ass kicked had it happen outside the US. Australia, England - and Scotland, parts of Edinburgh is particularly nuts. Apparently Groundskeeper Willie is not a parody. And here's what I think is going on. There is nothing to worry about. Bullies and naturally violent people get away with casual violence because there is no higher trump card on the table. It makes people more willing, more eager and less cautious. You really better think a couple of times, and a few more too, before you call someone down in a country where between 25-39% of the population own guns. Those kind of fights - brawls, fisticuffs, (don't the Irish have a 20 different words for a big fight? Donnybrook) are pretty rare in the US, at least in comparison to other gun controlled Western nations. How does the saying go? An armed society is a polite society.
Hmm.. in response to "perceived difference on HRT versus psychological evolution", I try to be cognizant of abstract, unreported effects. When juxtaposing differences and perceived differences, I usually try to err on the side of caution and chalk it up to the latter rather than the former.
However, this case *seems* to be more a matter of hormones, for several reasons:
- With hormones, the highs are higher and the lows are lower emotionally. Watching a movie, you emotionally invest in the characters.
- Being invested in the characters, you empathize more with protagonists.
- Testosterone is an aggression drug, which is why there's such thing as "'roid rage".
- When the violence was happening on screen, the violence just plain scared me so much that it hurt. I found myself jumping in my seat and then scolding myself because it was just a movie.
It's not that I've ever been pro-violence. I've always been a peace advocate. Things like guns scare me. However, I've never had a problem disassociating myself with movies. Movie guns are not real and people don't really die. Now, though, violence just plain scares me. I don't know why and it's not some kind of feminine ideal I'm trying to adhere to. Just wanted to see if anyone else had experienced it. :)
Movie guns are not real and people don't really die
Not so fast. The first safety rule in my union handbook (we do movies and TV too) is: The gun is always real. The gun is always loaded. You can - and people have - died as a result of getting hit in exactly the right spot by a blank. Did you know that the ATF has a seperate division just to send agents to movies and TV filmings to supervise the guns? When Benson and/or Stabler pulls that gun out, it's a real gun. It's not loaded with live ammo, but you need the right weight to make it look right.
Today I stopped at McD's (hereafter to be known as "the golden tits") for lunch. At the next table were two women and their children who were discussing some scary movie that the kids had seen. The discussion then moved on somehow to violent computer games.
I felt like telling the mothers to get the kids a copy of Eli Weisel's "Night"; about his childhood experiences in Auschwitz; so they would find out what real life is like. T don't think they would never look at another horror movie again.
Karen.
Quote from: justmeinoz on August 07, 2011, 06:08:21 AM
Today I stopped at McD's (hereafter to be known as "the golden tits") for lunch. At the next table were two women and their children who were discussing some scary movie that the kids had seen. The discussion then moved on somehow to violent computer games.
I felt like telling the mothers to get the kids a copy of Eli Weisel's "Night"; about his childhood experiences in Auschwitz; so they would find out what real life is like. T don't think they would never look at another horror movie again.
Karen.
Or maybe, crazy thought here, we should just let kids be kids and have fun?
Everyone could stand to have a bit more fun and be a bit less serious.
EDIT: Yes I see the irony in this post.
Isn't it at least one accepted fact that T as opposed to E will have a different "emotional filter".
Do you ever see guys cry in a movie? No
Do you see females cry? Yes
1) The feminine by nature, is nurturing and supportive.
And let's please, PLEASE, can all those exceptions.
Exceptions will only confirm the rule.
2) The male by nature is acquisitive and goal oriented. (Hunting the mammoth)
And in this case Milage will Not Vary, sorry.
Why do I think of differences in orgasms now...?
In any case, the female runs on E, and so do most of us.
Nurturing and supportive DOES NOT SPELL LIKE VIOLENCE - unless you start to threaten her offsprings or some such.
Violence in movies is fodder for repressed T aggression, prevented to express it self.
'Young guns' by nature pine for domination and that spells VIOLENCE.
Easy peasy...
It is obviously what nature had in mind for E and T and so we have to get by with it.
Acquisitive and goal orientation BTW makes the male sexy to the female --- up to a point, that is.
Let's not get into the violence of rape. It is of course all connected.
Axelle
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on August 07, 2011, 03:49:05 AM
HRT sounds so boring. =.=
+1
Quote from: LilKittyCatZoey on August 07, 2011, 03:55:15 AM
:D :D bring on twilight lol ;) ;)
Yeah!! +2 (LOL)
EL BANANERO - TRAILERAZO 6 - CREPUSCULO ABIERTO [VERSION OFICIAL] (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zUn-5WlzFL4#)
Quote from: Asfsd4214 on August 07, 2011, 04:02:23 AM
"Women don't like violence" is a gender stereotype people. Real people, real life people, come in all kinds of personality types.
And it's hard to attribute causes. But please don't make out that it's 'unfemale' to be violent. It's a stereotype.
+XD , exactly
Do you ever see guys cry in a movie? No
I do. I see other guys cry at art/theater/music stuff all the time. When we did the big rally scene for Milk almost everyone out there was crying, and we were just staging it.
Quote from: Audrey Jo Taylor on August 07, 2011, 12:21:56 AM
So, I went to see Rise of the Planet of the Apes tonight and one thing I noticed is that my aversion to violence seems to have intensified... to the point where I really don't want to watch anything with violence in it for a good, long while. Things like that never really bothered me before, but now, it's almost.. I don't know. Painful, or something. I was wondering if anyone has noticed an increase in aversion to watching violence since starting HRT?
I've noticed that a number of movies have incorporated a lot more gore over the past 20 years (as noted elsewhere, I began HRT a long time ago) and I was never a fan of gratuitous blood and gore just for the sake of it being on the screen...my aversion to most modern movies is more related to the fact that a majority are pure crap and that I am not going to pay ten bucks or whatever the ticket price is to watch a remake of something that sucked twenty and thirty years ago. I'm not sure I would sit through a remake of M*A*S*H* even though I loved the original movie and even the first few seasons of the series that spun from the movie...I just know the directors would ->-bleeped-<- it up.
And to link to the OP, the original PoA was good...the first sequel or two were a 'meh' but now that they want to resurrect it again, it is like FInal Destination part 83 or whatever number they are on. Some things are just best left to die a quiet death...
perhaps I should also add that I am a little jaded when it comes to blood and guts simply because of the number of crime scene photos I have had to view through the years...
really, the "manly" men who choose to repress their emotions are just weaker than most women, and the more "feminine" men who will let them flow. for one thing, i am a girl, but i'm pretty uncomfortable with emotions. i fear emotions like sadness and fear itself. i have a tendency to try and leave it behind, but it takes it's toll on me when i do so. in fact, there was one part of my life where i was very anxious and obsessive. i couldn't sleep or eat. having a 30 minute crying spell seemed to bring me back to normal.
I personally agree to both sides of thought: The general idea that HRT has shifted enjoyments from violence, and then Asfds's opinion that it's personality-oriented. The male body seems more oriented towards combat-capability, (muscular development, larger size) so I personally think that to an end men are more "Yay!" about making big noises and excessive violence just over being men. Given that testosterone is associated with male development, I feel convinced that the brain's designed to work with it too to help motivate itself to such ends. ---However, men and women are both quite simply human, so all the 'manly' instincts and 'womanly' instincts are inherit in any guy/girl, the ends are just varied to be 'appropriate'...and on top of it someone is always who they are before they're male or female.
So all-in-all, I think the idea that changing the chemicals in your brain will play with your drive a little bit on its own, but at the same time a more severe level probably comes from re-evaluating how one acts to realign with their active identity of physical sex.
For me, personally, I haven't noticed any change, but I'm really early into my transition and in the first place I already get turned away by realistic gore and loud noises. XD
I have never liked violence since I was little, but I never considered (and still don't consider) that it's because of my gender. I wouldn't like it anyway because I think it is just stupid. However, I do agree that the average male is more inclined towards violence. There are countless males who aren't, but on average they are.
I think to a large degree the 'emotionless guy' is not a historical truth, but rather a very specific anomaly. It was specifically the generation that grew up in the Depression who then had to go off and fight in Europe and the Pacific who really were kind of distanced from their feelings and emotions as a basic survival mechanism for getting through all that. (Good thing too, or else we'd be writing in German.) It's just that that one generation stood so large over the last half the last century that it was the only thing a lot of people saw.
Quote from: Axélle on August 07, 2011, 07:49:44 AM
Isn't it at least one accepted fact that T as opposed to E will have a different "emotional filter".
Do you ever see guys cry in a movie? No
Do you see females cry? Yes
1) The feminine by nature, is nurturing and supportive.
And let's please, PLEASE, can all those exceptions.
Exceptions will only confirm the rule.
2) The male by nature is acquisitive and goal oriented. (Hunting the mammoth)
And in this case Milage will Not Vary, sorry.
Why do I think of differences in orgasms now...?
In any case, the female runs on E, and so do most of us.
Nurturing and supportive DOES NOT SPELL LIKE VIOLENCE - unless you start to threaten her offsprings or some such.
Violence in movies is fodder for repressed T aggression, prevented to express it self.
'Young guns' by nature pine for domination and that spells VIOLENCE.
Easy peasy...
It is obviously what nature had in mind for E and T and so we have to get by with it.
Acquisitive and goal orientation BTW makes the male sexy to the female --- up to a point, that is.
Let's not get into the violence of rape. It is of course all connected.
Axelle
What a bunch of sterotyped crap, but then old people are always saying stupid backwards stuff aren't they?
Yes I was being ironic, no I wasn't serious (ok not entirely).
Yes I see men crying in movies, I also see women being violent. And unless you believe in god (and being an old person you probably do... oh wait there's that stereotyping again), nature doesn't have anything in mind.
Sorry for the hostile post, but I thought you might like to see the negative intolerance stereotypes breed. ;D
That and you kinda implied that as a female I'm not allowed to like violent movies, and that by having violence movies automatically loose any artistic merit, and I'm a big fan of Fight Club. ;D
The fastest growing category of violent crime are those involving girls/women aged 15-25 as the attacker.
Asfsd4214
honey, seems you mostly believe into the exceptions to the rule - which tends to prove them, eh.
1) Now the above statement will also be crap because it comes from an old person (me).
2) Yes I was being ironic, no I wasn't serious (ok not entirely).
Also have no idea what God would have to do with all that this?!
Now please go see 1) followed by 2) once again.
Don't know what's your case really, who said ANTHING of not being ALLOWED to watch violence?!
By my guest babe.
Eh... what we have here is failure to communicate...
Now let me go cry some more about being so misunderstood.
Love conquers all.
Kiss, kiss,
Axelle
Quote from: tekla on August 10, 2011, 01:25:57 AM
The fastest growing category of violent crime are those involving girls/women aged 15-25 as the attacker.
Wondering where you got that from Tekla...
(https://www.susans.org/proxy.php?request=http%3A%2F%2Foas.samhsa.gov%2F2k9%2F171%2F171FemaleViolenceFig1.jpg&hash=70b51994a38457b26442eaa95c00a8979172bca4)
Figure 1 Table. Past Year Violent Behaviors among Females Aged 12 to 17: 2002 to 2004 and 2006 to 2008 Violent Behavior 2002 to 2004 2006 to 2008
Got into a Serious Fight at School or Work 18.3% 18.6%
Took Part in a Group-against-Group Fight 15.0% 14.1%
Attacked Others with the Intent to Seriously Hurt Them 6.0% 5.7%
Source: 2002 to 2004 and 2006 to 2008 SAMHSA National Surveys on Drug Use and Health (NSDUHs).
http://oas.samhsa.gov/2k9/171/171FemaleViolence.htm (http://oas.samhsa.gov/2k9/171/171FemaleViolence.htm)
Maybe its more than T & E, but some other molecules as well.
The fights in school I normally hear about are between girls.
My Sister once taught at a large inner city Middle School, the only fights she ever had to breakup were the girls.
The fastest growing category of violent crime are those involving girls/women aged 15-25 as the attacker.
I've noticed this trend as well... Some girls even younger have attacked people because they know they can get away with it... They have learned how to "work the system" to their advantage, carrying out violent attacks and then acting all Innocent
Quote from: V M on August 10, 2011, 05:08:06 AM
The fastest growing category of violent crime are those involving girls/women aged 15-25 as the attacker.
I've noticed this trend as well... Some girls even younger have attacked people because they know they can get away with it... They have learned how to "work the system" to their advantage, carrying out violent attacks and then acting all Innocent
Its true girls can say the man attacked her so she protected herself who are we to say shes lying if she seems genuine...... here in lies the problem some womyn are using the fact that men usually are the cause to get away with it but hey a few rotten eggs wont change the system. Never would of guessed girls cause more fights because in my schools their hasnt been a single fight involving a girl in 5 years yet boys fight weekly but hay different area's different people :)
Well Zoey lives in this part of the world as I do. It may have to do with those different perceptions.
Unless nature by some mutation now has in mind, to make more and more females into territorial bitches?
If we look into the wild in Africa we of course see territorial females, but that is not the rule by far.
What if they get killed in a fight? Their offsprings will perish... not a good survival strategy, now is it?
BTW, we also not so far removed from such consequences IMHO.
Axelle
Not so much nature in this part of the world as the influence of drugs, gangs and fragmented life in large cities anywhere. Ethnicity plays a part too in the U.S., gangs!
SandraJane,
sounds just like some new version of the "wild" --- or back to caves if you wish.
3rd world slowly more civilized then the 1st? What a reversal of "progress"...
Thinking,
Axelle
You're right, I guess we think we are inventing something new. But the girls get caught up in the gang life also, like prison. Violence begets Violence.
* Violence begets Violence. *
That's it.
Some of our 'violence apostles' aught to take note.
It is not only in the physical practice of it, but also in one's 'mindset' i.e. 'digital based violence'
(have I just created a new word?:-)
Axelle
Quote from: Axélle on August 10, 2011, 06:20:34 AM
Some of our 'violence apostles' aught to take note.
It is not only in the physical practice of it, but also in one's 'mindset' i.e. 'digital based violence'
(have I just created a new word?:-)
Axelle
So far Axelle I can't find the term 'digital based violence' as such, but 'violence apostles' is a winner!
Still on the subj of violence, here's an interesting article from some 'violence apostles' on the different types and the mindset...
http://www.nononsenseselfdefense.com/four_types_of_violence.htm (http://www.nononsenseselfdefense.com/four_types_of_violence.htm)
Well there is "digital-violence" the word I first had in mind.
That does exist already.
Though as a ex-IT person it sounds a bit odd. Violating bits and bytes... ?
OK, so digital-violence is fine by me.
The point is NOT to ban it.
It would be like banning junk food.
But making provision on one's dietary plan and not ingest too much of the stuff.
Like, "you are what you eat", --- but also "you are WHAT YOU THINK"!!
Gosh, that website is also a some beyond my mental dietary plan.
Eish,
Axelle
Axelle, I'm surprised that I couldn't find the exact term "digital violence", like we hear allusions to it all the time on the news, print about computer and video games, but what is it exactly?
You've got a good handle on the language, how would you define it for "Webster's"? And you warned about banning it...
Honey, as they say: Google it... books get old too
Digital-Violence,
About 100,000,000 results
Should keep you busy some time babe :-)
Axelle
Bing'd it instead! Lousy results. Seriously, you have something definite in mind.
* Seriously, you have something definite in mind *
EVERYTHING on display is digital these days. Even the movie stock is going the way from analogue.
So EVERYTHING WE SEE IS DIGITAL(ISED) and every bit of violence shown uses this media. Simple as that.
All this stuff is like junk-food for the mind.
As for an adult it is bad enough, but for kids it be junk-food breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
Also, some of us adults can stay away from mental junk-food, kids really can't.
That is the tragedy of digital-violence. Only radio may still be an exception --- and funny enough it is mostly analogue, hm.
No idea if that answers the question, but there you are.
Ta, ta,
Axelle
Good Enough. Radio...theater of the mind...
I don't know but.... when people start saying things like "If you are a man you are violent and are insensitive and if you are a woman you are nurturing and emotional" is basically saying to me "if you want to be a woman you better stop playing video games that are violent, stop enjoying shows like the Soppranos and take up knitting" to me. Sorry but I am still gonna ride my motorcycle when I feel like it and no, that doesn't make me "less of a woman" because I don't sell my bike and spend that time dreaming of raising children...
All in good measure, why always get to the argumentative extrem of STOPPING?!
Nobody said that!
Eish,
Axelle
I'm with the OP on this one. My aversion to violence was already pretty strong given how badly I was abused as a child. But before HRT, I could still play video games like GTA or Red Dead Redemption without feeling anything. It was just a harmless video game, right?
Not anymore... now, the thought of it all makes me absolutely sick. I can't even handle digital violence. I can't handle lots of swearing. One thing I've never been is a prude, and I'm still not a prude, but violence and vulgarity make me very sad for the human condition and that just starts me crying. Yes, I cry when I see violence for the sake of violence.
I don't like real violence, but if it's fake I don't mind at all.
* ... now, the thought of it all makes me absolutely sick. I can't even handle digital violence. I can't handle lots of swearing. One thing I've never been is a prude, and I'm still not a prude, but violence and vulgarity make me very sad for the human condition... *
Yep, I feel the same as Zoë has put it. Also more strongly after HRT, and that's just fine by me.
Maybe we ALWAYS had this in us, and HRT just made us connect more to it, so?
An added issue, if digital-voilence is banned say on TV, it is so often replaced by digital-stupidity. Just as depressing. I stopped watching TV, it is > 90% mind numbing for me, adds and all.
Axelle
I'm a long time gamer; games were always my favorite escape from reality. I was also ridiculously good at them, in particular violent games. The game violence never got me excited though, even on T. Instead for me the games were about competition; something we all can enjoy. The violence in games doesn't really pull at my heartstrings the way real violence does. Like for instance, I can't watch violent movies or horror flicks at all. I tried watching the movie "kick ass" with my cousins last week and my feelings went from disgusted, shocked and back again. I HATE violent movies. Even before, on T, I disliked them.
Though with games, even with HRT and feeling fully feminine in every other way, I can still sit down and do really good at violent games. In particular military shooters like the Battlefield series. My cousins had that new Mortal Kombat and even though it made me cringe with its X-RAY shots (not to mention sexism!) I still played it just because I was good at it. My cousins needed me to beat the hard levels, heheh. Maybe I can stand it because the game sprites just don't register in my subconscious as real people the way movie actors do.
I have to admit though lately, I feel a lot happier playing peaceful games like Cityville on Facebook.
Quote from: Zoë Natasha on August 10, 2011, 09:27:27 PM
I'm with the OP on this one. My aversion to violence was already pretty strong given how badly I was abused as a child. But before HRT, I could still play video games like GTA or Red Dead Redemption without feeling anything. It was just a harmless video game, right?
Not anymore... now, the thought of it all makes me absolutely sick. I can't even handle digital violence. I can't handle lots of swearing. One thing I've never been is a prude, and I'm still not a prude, but violence and vulgarity make me very sad for the human condition and that just starts me crying. Yes, I cry when I see violence for the sake of violence.
This probably most closely relates to my life experiences. My dad beat me when I was a kid, so I kind took a pacifist bent growing up. However, LOVED action movies, the movies from the Saw series, anything with martial arts, etc. It was just good fun. I didn't want to take part in the violence, but I got the adrenaline rush from watching them. I have a high degree of self-cognizance in regards to hormones stuff. I try to always be aware of my feelings, my surroundings, and to note how things change. Hormones definitely hasn't been any kind of "magic switch" for me to feel a different way. I just get to the point of almost tears with violence now. I just can't handle it. It's not that anything in my perspective has particularly changed either. I really don't act overtly feminine because that doesn't feel natural. I really think that HRT has perhaps increased my ability to feel for others, maybe, or something. I mean, there's already an anecdotal adage that the "highs are higher and the lows are lower" in regards to emotions, so why wouldn't it stand to reason that aversion to violence, since it's tied to an emotion, would be strengthened somewhat as a result of your body chemistry being messed with?
I guess this is the last I'll post on it. Thanks everyone for your responses.