Looking For Validation in All the Wrong Places
http://womenborntranssexual.com/2011/08/16/looking-for-validation-in-all-the-wrong-places/ (http://womenborntranssexual.com/2011/08/16/looking-for-validation-in-all-the-wrong-places/)
8/16/11
By Suzan
Over the weekend I had encounters with two different people. Both were confrontational. One demanded I validate her life. The other tried to invalidate my life.
Now if you think about it, I think it should be clear that both are different sides of the same coin.
I was left thinking that I have better things to do with my time than fight with either of these people.
One party came off as seriously disturbed the other came off as very seriously needy.
I'm not particularly into giving either of the aforementioned people what they want.
I've read some of the articles she has written. She strikes me as an extremist type individual. And, I make no judgments about her being left, right or other. Just that her positions border on the extreme of whatever she writes.
At times though there worms through some very salient and important points to her views. One being that if you need validation for you being yourself by someone else, you're in trouble. Your may be looking for help and validation in the wrong place! Taking people like Susan to task for their views on subject matter is one thing. But, giving them a way to needle you in your own insecurity that is perceived by them as asking for validation of yourself, is troubling and something all together different. It will be a rough ride!
It's also their weapon of choice to tear you down when they sense you may be insecure in your sense of self. Even if you are confident in who you are; if your view is different from their narrative and dare to speak to it, the haranguing your going to receive will be merciless.
Thick skins and complete confidence in your own validity are prerequisite to keeping your sanity when addressing the other extreme issues they hold. It's also useless to try and convince them of who you are once they think you aren't. So, venture carefully when encountering one of these extremist type transsexuals.
Dawn
"I did what I had to do to make an impossible life merely difficult.
I love it! Who needs validation? All you need is a safe place to work where you get the respect that you can earn. The rest of society can think what they will. You need not cater to their dribble.
Cindi
I thought every morning of waking up was essentially a validation.
!Beep beep beep!
"Awwwwwwwwwwwww"
'Who am I? Where am I?'
-General yawning and opening of bleary eyes, taking in the scene, remembering some items but not always from this room-
~Oh yeah, that's who I am~