Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Female to male transsexual talk (FTM) => Topic started by: Father Way on August 21, 2011, 09:47:45 PM

Title: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: Father Way on August 21, 2011, 09:47:45 PM

I'll be seeing her for the first time in ten years. She absolutely doesn't know about me being FTM (1 yr post-op, a few month on T).  Any advice? I don't want to lose her :(
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: kyle_lawrence on August 21, 2011, 10:19:44 PM
I assume you are meeting up with her somewhere in person, and she is expecting to be looking for a girl?   That alone could be an issue.  If you are already on T and had surgery, you probably don't look anything like what she is expecting.   I would suggest telling her before, at least warn her that you have changed quite a bit and then fill her in on the details later.  I would just be concerned that if she is expecting a girl, and then a guy comes up to her, that she may freak out a bit.  Not the best way for her to find out.   

I know this sounds super cliche, but if she is really a friend, you won't lose her.  Just keep in mind that you may completely blow her mind, and it may take some time for her to understand and deal with it.
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: cindianna_jones on August 21, 2011, 10:57:46 PM
Make sure to let her know before you meet. It could be very uncomfortable if you don't.
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: tekla on August 21, 2011, 10:58:42 PM
The best surprise is no surprise.
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: Electric Wizard on August 22, 2011, 01:55:11 AM
I fourth the sentiment of warning her before she sees you.
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: Michael Joseph on August 22, 2011, 02:18:12 AM
i agree with the rest of them, i would def give her a heads up and maybe explain more when you see her
Title: Re: Going to see one of my best friends.. Need advice
Post by: Father Way on August 25, 2011, 05:04:06 AM
Thanks guys. I sent her a message and waiting for her response. AND I added that I'm totally gay!


Quote from: kyle_lawrence on August 21, 2011, 10:19:44 PM
I assume you are meeting up with her somewhere in person, and she is expecting to be looking for a girl?   

Yes, that's the case.