Susan's Place Transgender Resources

Community Conversation => Transsexual talk => Male to female transsexual talk (MTF) => Topic started by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 02:16:28 PM

Title: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 02:16:28 PM
I am having huge problems... So i am being evicted. I finally have a job though aftr 2 months. my ex who was living with me left to his parents he said he wanted to be friends but hes not suppose to talk to me for 2 weeks so he can get over me. I have no one to help me.. if i had my paycheck now which i wont get till the 9th. i would just move. I am lost with no options.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Kim 526 on September 03, 2011, 02:40:46 PM
Ouch, Natalie so sorry to hear that. Is there any way you could talk to your current landlord/landlady to ask if you could stay until you get your paycheck? And also - make sure you know the eviction laws where you live. In many cases it's very difficult to evict someone without a long and structured legal process taking place. Since you have potential to pay in the near future this might help your case. If you're not sure find a legal aid attorney who may be able to advise you for 0$.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 03:33:20 PM
i went to court and i did try. they said i would have to be out by monday or my stuff will be on the corner.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 04:07:14 PM
ok so its bumped up to tomorrow... i have to be out by then apparently.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: azSam on September 03, 2011, 04:15:29 PM
Wow Natalie. Do you have any family that can help?
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Amazon D on September 03, 2011, 04:57:32 PM
Where do you live? There may be one of us close by to you who can help, but we need to know where you are. I am in central Pa
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Lisbeth on September 03, 2011, 05:03:00 PM
I was in your shoes three months ago. Where do you live?
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 05:31:44 PM
i live in lubbock tx, my parents cant really help either... they are sending 100 dollars now but idk im stuck because of labor weekend. ive txted/called everyone, they all told me sry i cant help. ive been crying all day.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Randi on September 03, 2011, 06:38:43 PM
I am sorry to hear you are going thru this. Contact some of the churches in your area-many of them I am certain have compassionate ministries that would help you with money, food, or a place to sleep.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Amazon D on September 03, 2011, 06:47:38 PM
I supose you have a car. I would use the money from your mom for a rental unit to store your things. I live in a house with no plumbing so i get along well and i have lived in a vehicle before. What kind of work are you getting? Wow lubbock is like so out there... sorry about that guy leaving you stranded.. some men like to do that.. use you for a place to stay then go on..
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: JennX on September 03, 2011, 07:14:08 PM
Wow girl, that sucks. Sorry.  :-\

Any shelters, churches, cheap hotels around? The renting a storage unit idea sounds pretty good too.

Did your landlord previously notify you of his intent to evict you? Most states have pretty specific laws when it comes to evicting tenants from a property. There is usually a 30-45 day period from the first notice, until the final eviction date. They just can't tell you to be out tomorrow, unless you don't have a written lease agreement.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 08:13:39 PM
i cant drive... idk what to do. asked a church they couldnt help either... been trying for a while. and getting no where. no one seems to understand. i am at my end. i just cant do this anymore
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Rabbit on September 03, 2011, 09:43:33 PM
~hugs~ I know you must be under SOOO much stress right now... but don't give up. You will get through it.

First check craigslist (or couchsurfers or something like that), maybe you could find someone with a place who are looking for a roommate...you might be able to work something out shorter term with them (from their point of view, they have an empty room and they are paying for it... someone living there for a couple weeks and then paying when they get the paycheck would save them money).

If that doesn't work, maybe find something short term to do as you wait for your next job to start. Could you go visit family? Extended family? Maybe there is an ex in your past who you have a good relationship with still that might help because they still care about you.

Then, if worse comes to worse, you can always camp it out in your car for a little bit (it SUCKS, but it isn't the end of the world).

Really, you just have to get over this little bump and your life will be back on track :) It might seem like things are horrible, but a couple months homeless with a job you know is waiting to start in a few months is really managable (even though, again, it sucks a lot).
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 09:47:23 PM
no car no family and everyone here is charging 300+ to live in a room and ppl learn that im trans then say horrible things. i am stuck... i have dont litterally everything. even craigslist.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Forever21Chic on September 03, 2011, 09:49:09 PM

 
Quote from: Natalie <3 on September 03, 2011, 08:13:39 PM
i cant drive... idk what to do. asked a church they couldnt help either... been trying for a while. and getting no where. no one seems to understand. i am at my end. i just cant do this anymore



    Awe girl don't give up hope, i was in the same situation awhile back and i def know it seems hopeless but there's always a way. Try asking your friends for a place to stay for a few days or something?  *Huggs* 
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 09:51:26 PM
i know no one here i asked a trans friend she said she cant  cuz her ex is sleeping on the couch. and no one else will help me they all say sry.. and thats it.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Rabbit on September 03, 2011, 09:53:50 PM
Are there LGBT resources in your area you could turn to? Or start researching homeless shelters or options like that?

Or, maybe you could find a place to stay for a little bit out of state? Then return when your job is going to start? A bus or train ticket isn't that bad if you need to get around.

Don't panic! You just have to stay calm... and figure out a plan for tomorrow. Find out where you will put your stuff... and keep researching like crazy tonight to try and figure out your options.

Maybe you could even chat with your employer? Explain the sittuation and try to start sooner? Or get an advance or something?

Really, not everyone is heartless or doesn't care. Some are horrible and will react badly, but there are others who are truly good people.

I would keep trying craigslist in the meantime. And keep sending out messages with ideas on how to make it work out for both parties.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 09:56:48 PM
 tried the shelter there are no beds and no other shelters here. there are so many homeless here.. i started my job and i get my first check on the 9th. i have to be out by 9 am or they will throw me in jail and my stuff will sit on the corner is what im being told. i did talk to my employer they said that sucks.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Forever21Chic on September 03, 2011, 09:57:38 PM
Quote from: Natalie <3 on September 03, 2011, 09:51:26 PM
i know no one here i asked a trans friend she said she cant  cuz her ex is sleeping on the couch. and no one else will help me they all say sry.. and thats it.


  Well if it's that bad break out a phone book and look up any shelters (homeless shelters, women's shelters etc). There are alot of free services out there from the government, im def guilty of milking the gov for every possible thing i can lol. I wish i could do something for you but i live multi states away from where you are. Don't give up hun  :'(

*Edit* oop's rabbit beat me to the shelter advice..
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 03, 2011, 10:03:01 PM
i literally have untill 9 am tomorrow nothing is open they screwed me on this.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Rabbit on September 03, 2011, 10:17:08 PM
Just throwing out ideas here...have you tried http://portal.hud.gov/hudportal/HUD?src=/topics/homelessness (http://portal.hud.gov/hudportal/HUD?src=/topics/homelessness) ?

Humm, you can hang out in libraries and coffee shops during the day when you aren't working. And otherwise you will be working...

So basically, you just need a place to bunk for the night.

Maybe the idea of a storage shelter for your stuff is a good idea then? You only need to do it for about a week.

Or going to a camp site? Camping out for a week? They have restrooms and showers and things there... sucks sleeping outside, but you could manage it.

You just got to get to the 9th. And to do that you just need a place to sleep at night. Kind of like an adventure! It isn't for that long... and most your time you will be sitting around in shops or other places with AC anyway (with internet access!).

You can do it :) One of my classmates last term was sleeping in his car at nights because he was so busy. He wasn't even homeless! He just needed to work and the labs closed at night...so he just did what he had to do to save the most time. You definitely can do it!

You definitely have options. They aren't the most fun (and you might feel like crap all week), but you will get through it and once you get your paycheck you will be over the hurdle and be ready to move into a new place (get that set up as soon as possible).
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: sonopoly on September 04, 2011, 10:36:20 AM
I am praying for you, Natalie.  I know you are in dire straits right now.  You are in a tough situation, but now there is nothing to do, but to try to endure in the best way possible.  Set up a paypal account where people can donate. Keep posting and giving us updates.  People do care, but there's only so much they can do.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Randi on September 04, 2011, 11:23:30 AM
Maybe you could find a room share on Craigslist that might be willing to work with you until your check comes in. I too lived out of a vehicle for a time-a toolshed for a while longer than that. If my relationship at home ends anytime soon I will have to find a room in someones house that is for rent.

Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 04, 2011, 02:12:59 PM
Well I have a place to stay for 4 nights. I get paid on Friday so I should beable to get an afficiency apt
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Rabbit on September 04, 2011, 02:42:32 PM
~hugs~ see? it worked out! :) Yay :)
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: sonopoly on September 04, 2011, 03:28:43 PM
I'm so happy to hear this, Natalie. I'm glad you were able to figure something out.  Keep us updated on how you're doing.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: Amazon D on September 04, 2011, 05:41:00 PM
Yea prayers do work for those who prayed.

God is love
Love is God
we make a resting place in our hearts for LOVE/GOD
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: BillieTex on September 04, 2011, 06:03:42 PM
very happy to hear something worked out for you prayers really do help  :angel:
although we all wish there was more we can do when someone is in a bad way.
Title: Re: what can i do?
Post by: drvotion86 on September 04, 2011, 07:35:56 PM
My ex finally talked to me... he thought I was mad he up and left. I kinda was but I'm over it. He keeps me calm even if I don't love him in that way I still love him.