Sorry, ths is going to be more of a rant than anything seriously thought-provoking.
So I started my Senior year tuesday. That would have made today my second day at school. I'm already so done it's insane.
This summer I came out to ALL of my close friends, and I only really hung out with them, so I got used to being called Kyle and a guy and not treated like a girl.
Last year I was very quiet, shy, and generallly just stayed away from people. Since I had the chance to really be myslef, I sort of grew into a much more outward and talkative person. I'm more relaxed and casual and people would read me as a guy.
And even though everyone at school is oblivious to my being Trans, I feel like they are reading me as a guy because of the way I act, but they are treating me like a girl. I know they are just gnorant, but it's driving me crazy that I hear my friend call me 'Bro' and 'dude' and then calls me by my birth name right afterwards.
I should be happy that I'm getting read more like a guy than last year- but I have no clue how I'm going to last with this everyday. I've even seriosuly considered making my transition more public. Due to my location and the general close-mindedness of the people I attend school with, it would probably be more trouble than it's worth.
Is school doing this to anyone else?
I haven't started school yet.
But what if you just told people that you wish to change your name to "Kyle."? Tell them that you just like that name, you feel like it fits you better. You don't got to tell them that you're trans first.
Omagawd! Fellow new senior! *high five* ^.^
I'm sick of school just because I'm sick of school. Apart from the usual reasons to be sick of it, (It's the last year for one) it's also one of those things that'll keep me from hormones, I'm still in the closet to everyone, and I don't wanna come out now. But actually I am a lot happier this year because I know my identity. It's not like the first 2 where I was stressed about everything. Still, really would like the hormones. =.=
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on September 07, 2011, 11:00:15 PM
Omagawd! Fellow new senior! *high five*
I'm sick of school just because I'm sick of school. Apart from the usual reasons to be sick of it, (It's the last year for one) it's also one of those things that'll keep me from hormones, I'm still in the closet to everyone, and I don't wanna come out now. But actually I am a lot happier this year because I know my identity. It's not like the first 2 where I was stressed about everything. Still, really would like the hormones. =.=
* High five* And yes, Im sick of it because it's Highschool, too. Having a really nice hold on my identity personally helps me out, too. I jut find myself on edge with everyone. A guy buddy of mine was sitting at the end of a row. He looked at me and said, "Aw, I'm stuck by all the girls." So I immediatly replied, "I'm about the least feminine perosn here, so I think your good."
He was like, "Yeah, but technically your still a girl." And I had to agree.
More ranting- It doesnt help that half of my schedule is health classes. Anatomy and Phyisiology is just my FAV~ -eye roll-
Quote from: JohnAlex on September 07, 2011, 10:55:57 PM
I haven't started school yet.
But what if you just told people that you wish to change your name to "Kyle."? Tell them that you just like that name, you feel like it fits you better. You don't got to tell them that you're trans first.
I would really like too, but if I asked them that, my sister would catch on (She's a junior) and that would lead to a chat with my parents. =/ I feel so stuck.
Quote from: Kyle_T on September 07, 2011, 11:07:48 PMI would really like too, but if I asked them that, my sister would catch on (She's a junior) and that would lead to a chat with my parents. =/ I feel so stuck.
Oh I see. so I'm guessing your parents wouldn't be accepting of you?
How would your parents respond if they knew you wanted to change the name people call you by? Would they make a big deal out of it?
Being trans is a pretty big deal.
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on September 07, 2011, 11:15:53 PMBeing trans is a pretty big deal.
Oh of course it is. but I wasn't saying he should tell them that he's trans. just that he wants to change his name. And would his parents care too much if he wanted to change his name.
They know my girlfriend has a boyfriend named Kyle and they would make that conncetion and start asking questions. I thought about maybe trying out a more androgynous name. Lynn. It's my birth middle name and I did start trying to get a few eople to use it but they have been calling me 'Liv' for so long they wont drop it -.-
Quote from: ~RoadToTrista~ on September 07, 2011, 11:15:53 PM
Being trans is a pretty big deal.
Especially in a tiny country school with a max four hundered students. It wouldn't be overlooked.
Quote from: Kyle_T on September 07, 2011, 11:34:59 PMThey know my girlfriend has a boyfriend named Kyle and they would make that conncetion and start asking questions. I thought about maybe trying out a more androgynous name. Lynn. It's my birth middle name and I did start trying to get a few eople to use it but they have been calling me 'Liv' for so long they wont drop it -.-
Yeah, a gender-neutral name is what I went with for just that reason. I picked a name like "Kelly", it can be a guy's name, or it can be a really fem name. Instead of a name like "Alex" which can be a girl's name, but is traditionally male.
I mean, whatever works for you and you like.
And as far as them not wanting to change to call you by your new name, you just have to be tough with them. For me, it took me hating my birth name so much that I go to the point where I would yell at or (almost) punch anyone who dared to call me by my birth name. People changed when they saw how big of a deal it was to me. You kinda just got to be tough with them and force them to change. Otherwise, they don't think it's a big deal and don't want to bother.
I'm sick of school already and the semester just started. I'm taking online classes and the first week one of my teachers posted 3 hours of video to watch. So much for easing in. I also get the joy of seeing my lovely girly name everywhere on the site.
I where out on my first school as trans but still they ignored it as the topic because they said I wasnt allowed to "make other feel unconfortable"
I got to use a bathroom for myself in the showering insteed of the girls or guys and thats where it,
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the next school refused to let me in because I where trans,
I were very disapointed, but after I showed alot of effort I got in anyway and the teachers and pupils accepted me very well, I never been so accepted they just asked me whatever I would sleep with the guys or girls and if I said guys there where no problem, where on my last school I would have been scold for even being in there room a certain time at the night.
--
my last school said I had to go to the girls shower with the other girls, and such thing,
they know im trans but the acceptence is 50%
I also got a bath for my own but it where because I told them where taking homones and it maked a small penis, and I didnt thought it would be confortable for the girls if I where in there shower.
I go to night school and I hate it because I'm in an all girls class, although the other day I snuck into the boys room and thankfully the teacher was good at math so I said I needed him to help me with my Algebra and they let me stay. Also I can't check out any girls because the boys go straight to their class and the girls have to wait in the hall and I like to look at the girls who get out of day school (Day school lets out when night school starts) and I can't do that in a line full of girls because they'll give me dirty looks. Whenever I have to go to the bathroom they'll get on their little walki talkis and say "I have a young lady that has to go to the restroom" Ugh, that makes me want to throw up. and then my counselor was talking to me yesterday and said "You're a something young woman" and In my head I'm like "Young man, stupid." I would rather go to day school. At least I don't feel so depressed when I go to day school.
I actually came out as a freshman, last year, but I know a lot of the upperclassmen, mostly seniors and sophomores, so they've all pretty much knew my sex, and refereed to me by sex rather than gender. This year though, has gone surprisingly well. I came out to my teachers, sent them all an email and gave them a letter on the first day of school, and they all refer to me as Kayden, by male pronouns, and then today a girl from South Africa came into the office and then my principle, who I've never even spoken about this matter to, had introduced me to said girl as Kayden. It felt great. But I am very excited for school to be over. Because I've heard some rumors about me already, and although I laugh at the ridiculousness of all of them, it still hurts. I had to quit drum line because my doctor said if I continue to wear binders, I have to wear two to be comfortable and to give me a seemingly flat chest, I couldn't participate in marching band, so I was forced to join pit. And I have no idea what to do, because I play clarinet and then normally play bass drum in drum line. And then the section leader in pit refers to me as my birth name and uses female pronouns, and I feel like he's creeping on me and is always touching me and it just makes me feel extremely dysphoric, but I've learned to just shrug him off. I want summer back, or at least go to a different school, and start anew.
i feel the same its my second year out at school im sick of doing the same thing for years its only the 3rd day. it bothers me a lot all my peers are asses and i cant exactly talk to my friends about my life besides school stuff.
"Tired" and "School" should never be used in the same sentence unless a "Not" is in the middle, as far as I'm concerned. If I'm ever tired of school it's due to boredom or the students.
However I have yet to go to school as a guy so I wouldn't know. My current school is a uniform school and girls are forbidden from wearing skirts so there's no way I'm going to be read as a boy there.
Weellll. This post and how mutual these feelings can be made me try out soething today. I had an appointment with the counsler about financial aid for some dual college credits classes that I' having trouble paying for. At the end she said bye ad I didnt get up.
I said, " So. What exaclty counts for confidentiality to hgh school counslers?"
And she gave me a list of stuff like brekaingt the law, wanting to hurt yourself or others, etc....
And I danced around it for about five minutes and then told her. She acted all supportive but used my brth name two more times in the convo about it and kept calling me 'sis', the term she uses for all the girl tudents when trying to relate. It's nice she didn't freak out but sort of discouraging.
She gave me a speech about how not to listen to what people say when they are mean. And that I'm not a freak or weird or different. It sounded sort of... rehearsed. Like a script. She said if anyone harrased me to tell her immediatly. I told her that I doubt people would assume I'm trans and I get called a lesbian because of the way I dress.
Then she asked if I was attracted to girls. And I was like- Well.... -.- Yeah.' I didnt tell her that i had a girlfriend of nearly four years and she didn't seem convinced.
My favorite part of the convo was when she said "I just don't want you to feel likeyour a freak for being confused about your gender... "
And I quickly and very firmly said, "I'm not confused."
We talked a little bit and then I left. I don't really know how to take this as a whole.
Sorry it's so long D=
It sounded sort of... rehearsed. Like a script.
It is.
I haven't really started school yet, but I'm gonna be homeschooled when I do. :icon_mrhappy:
But yeah, before I sure was tired of school. So I pretty much just stopped going. Which led to my parents being forced to let me be homeschooled. And I'm kinda looking forward to the teacher getting here and stuff. Because he is gonna call me by my preferred name and male pronouns. So that's positive. Although I don't suggest using my technique because I have missed an awful lot of school. And I am quite worried about that. :-\
And I am quite worried about that
You should be, its a highly competitive world, and guys vs. guys is very, very competitive.